Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like he'd just
been run over by a train.
His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised
and he's walking with a limp.
"What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender... Read more
Questions That Puzzle Me
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
... Read more
An Irishman is in a pub about as drunk as itís possible to get.
A group of guys notice his condition and decide to be good Samaritans and take him home.
First they stand him up to get to his wallet so they can find out where he liv... Read more
Keep Your Berries Mold-Free
The key to prevent berries from molding.
Berries are delicious, but they're also kind of delicate. Raspberries in particular seem like they can mold before you even get them home from the market.
There's nothing more tragic than... Read more
10 Men and 1 Woman
Eleven people were hanging on a rope, under a helicopter.
10 men and 1 woman.
The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to leave,
Because otherwise they were all going to fall. ... Read more
Well, A Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other,
And finally they got married, and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam.'
Of course, they wanted the best for Yam.
When it was time, they told her about the f... Read more
The Philosophy of Charles Schultz
The Charles Schulz Philosophy
TRUER WORDS etc., etc.
(This is marvelous!! There are two sets of questions.
Scroll slowly and read carefully to receive and enjoy full
The following is the philosophy of C... Read more
Medicare in a Nut Shell
The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, 'Hello..'
'Mrs. Sanders, please.'
'Mrs. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week... Read more
Things I Learned in the South
THINGS I LEARNED IN THE SOUTH
A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.
There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of... Read more
Idaho Hunting Laws
A Washington state Guy and an Idaho Man were hunting in up-state Idaho near the Canadian border when an illegal alien runs across the field.
The Idaho Man takes careful aim, shoots him.
"You can't do that!" cried the Washington Guy.
"No,... Read more
After being married for 40 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, "Forty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 23... Read more
An Arab enters a taxi.......... Once he is seated he asks the cab driver to turn off the radio because he must not hear music as decreed by his religion and, in the time of the prophet, there was no music, especially Western music which is music... Read more
From Aesop to Leno
Subject: Political quotes
* If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates
* The problem with political jokes is they get elected.
~Henry Cate, VII
... Read more
While in China , an American man is very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom the entire time he is there.
A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with bright green and purple... Read more
The "Middle Wife"
The 'Middle Wife' by an Anonymous 2nd grade teacher
I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back.
Wh... Read more
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