1. If walking/cycling is good for your health, the postman would be immortall.
2. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water and is fat.
3. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years.
... Read more
So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day.... About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, ... Read more
For those who don't know, I broke my fibula 11 days ago. I've been in a boot with limited mobility--which is hard for me.
Today I say an orthopedist and he said my leg was healing fine and I need to wear the boot for 4 more weeks. He did say... Read more
No one believes seniors . . . everyone thinks they are senile.
An elderly couple was celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired. H... Read more
Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter. The man at the counter asked the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"
"Eight," the boy replied.
The man continued, "do you ... Read more
Top Ten Reasons
Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women
And here we go...
#10 - You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.
#9 - You can keep one gun at home and have another for when you're on the road.
#8 - If you admire a fr... Read more
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times ... Read more
OLD PERSON PRIDE
I'm passing this on as I did not want to be the only old person receiving it.
Actually, it's not a bad thing to be called, as you will see.
•Old People are easy to spot at sporting events; during the playing of th... Read more
An old Italian lived alone in New Jersey . He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard.
His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to... Read more
TWENTY-NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE
1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences.
He thought he was God and I didn't.
2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Some people are alive on... Read more
Pecans in the Cemetery
On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old, pecan tree just
inside the cemetery fence.
One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree,
out of sight, and bega... Read more
> Tour boats ferry people out to the USS Arizona Memorial in Hawaii every thirty minutes.
> We just missed a ferry and had to wait thirty minutes.
> I went into a small gift shop to kill time. ... Read more
I have read all of the health articles on Spark People and I'm on my second read. I need those three points! Anyway, I've determined that I'm not going to die too soon. A lot of the ailments say that it's bad if you're losing weight with no e... Read more
I saw an infomercial on TV for a banana ice cream maker. This may be a good product but you don't need it. It takes frozen bananas and puts them through a grinder to mash them up. You can do this yourself. I have done it but I didn't like th... Read more