Frozen Crabs and the Blonde
Frozen Crabs and the Blonde
A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde flight attendant to take care of them for him.
She took the box and promised to put it in the cr... Read more
A WOMAN was flying from Seattle to San Francisco . Unexpectedly, the plane was diverted to Sacramento along the way. The flight attendant explained that there would be a delay, and if the passengers wanted to get off the aircra... Read more
The Green Thing
In the line at the store, the cashier told the older woman that plastic bags weren’t good for the environment. The woman apologized to her and explained, “We didn’t have the green thing back in my day.”
That’s right, they didn’t have the gr... Read more
Who Does What????
WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.
The hu... Read more
What if there isn't "anymore"
One day a woman's husband died, and on that clear, cold morning, in the
warmth of their bedroom, the wife was struck with the pain of learning that
sometimes there isn't "anymore".
No more hugs, no more special moments to celebrate to... Read more
Using credit/debit card?
Read this note very carefully.
I did not know about the clear button,
but I will be pushing the clear button before I swipe my gas or debit card
and after just to be safe.
People are get... Read more
Where do we go to eat?????
A group of 15-year-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner.
> Finally, they agreed to meet at the Dairy Queen next to the Ocean View restaurant because they had only $6.00 among them and Jimmy Johnson, the cute boy in Social Studi... Read more
"ICE" your Phone
Apparently this is a standard procedure paramedics follow at the scene of an accident when they come across your cell phone.
ICE - 'In Case of Emergency'
We all carry our mobile phones with names & numbers stored in its memory but no... Read more
In the year 2010, the Lord came unto Noah,
Who was now living in England and said:
"Once again, the earth has become wicked and over
-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me."
"Build another... Read more
How to Stay Young
Stay Young My Friend
We all need to read this one over and over until it becomes part of who we are !
HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Try everything twice.
On one woman's tombstone she said she wanted this epitaph:
"Tried everything ... Read more
A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no
Lessons, nor prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted, and the
Horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a ... Read more
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE PETS, THIS IS A TRUE STORY.
FOR THOSE THAT DON'T, IT IS A TRUE STORY.
The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door.
Dear Dogs and Cats: The dishes with the paw prints are yours and co... Read more
This new version of the "footprints" story really caught me off guard at the end...What a blessing.. IT'S AWESOME!!!
Imagine you and the Lord Jesus are walking down the road together. For much of the way, the Lord's footprints go along ... Read more
Quick Thinking Oldster
One day an old German Shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.
The old German Shepherd thinks... Read more
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Why do I like about retirement
Question: How many days in a week?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday
Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
Question: How many retirees to change a li... Read more