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BLUEROSE73's Blogs

Today ... looking back on a very difficult week
Wednesday, November 16, 2011      3 comments

I had no idea going into the weekend last week just how difficult the road was going to be. I have to start with a disclaimer. This blog contains very touchy and emotional stuff. It involves abortions. If you have strong feelings eithe... Read more
Today ... I'm actually kind of scared
Thursday, November 10, 2011      8 comments

No fitness yesterday. Instead, Tammy came home. It was great. She is back with her kids. I went out for the evening. Wings and a movie with a friend. Just to give her space with her family and her home again. I found out something las... Read more
Talk about pushing his luck...
Wednesday, November 09, 2011      0 comments

Terry's still keeping in touch via text messages. Well, last night after I figured all was done for the night, he texted to see if I was still awake. Turns out he used some lame excuse of his room mate checking on the tractor to try and get an... Read more
Tuesday, November 08, 2011      3 comments

I realized something last night. I am so far beyond my breaking point, it's not even funny. I mean most people reach it and shut down. Well, I've been shutting down some things, but still functioning. I need to. But I'm looking forwar... Read more
Today ... a reflection on this past weekend
Monday, November 07, 2011      1 comments

Wow, it's been busy. And a lot has happened not just to keep me busy, but also personally. Last blog I was saying how Terry's not being there for me when I needed a friend again was the last straw. I know I'm kinda wishy washy when it com... Read more
No rest for the wicked
Friday, November 04, 2011      4 comments

Last night my friend Tammy ended up back in the hospital. I spent the entire evening basically getting her back to the hospital. We had to make two ER trips before they admitted her. I guess I don't have the luxury of falling apart anym... Read more
Lost touch with my inner strength
Thursday, November 03, 2011      6 comments

I just realized something. I've lost touch with my inner strength. Again. Yes, I do this quite often. When I'm aware of it and feeling well, I take for granted I'll never loose it again. I mean, it's right there. Inside me. I don't ... Read more
Thursday, November 03, 2011      4 comments

Been taking it easy since yesterday. I know in my head why I'm sitting teetering on my breaking point. It's just a delayed reaction to all sorts of stuff. But I've found knowing is just not quite enough to to stop it all. Tammy is back h... Read more
Reached my breaking point ....
Wednesday, November 02, 2011      9 comments

I'm under so much stress lately. And I know it. But today at work I finally reached my breaking point. I have been pulled in 5 different directions today. And normally I do well with things like that. I actually like to be busy. But ... Read more
Today ... Just kind of sitting in limbo
Wednesday, November 02, 2011      0 comments

I was so tired yesterday it wasn't even funny. So it was a rough evening. Even the boys were tired. And RJ had too much sugar. But it was all okay. We got them all settled and into bed without too much problem. And we did it early. Te... Read more
Today ... very tired and thinking of making a HUGE mistake, or maybe I already did
Tuesday, November 01, 2011      4 comments

I'm just checking back in really quick. I don't have a lot of time to be online today. But right now I'm waiting for information to come in, and not expecting it for at least an hour or so. Last night I went and picked up my daughter. It... Read more
Today ... just a quick check in
Monday, October 31, 2011      4 comments

My daughter is coming to visit me for a week. She'll help out with the kids while I work, so that's all going to be okay. As for Terry, I tried to talk to him. It didn't go too well. I think he's off avoiding my texts and everything again... Read more
Today... What a crazy week!!!
Friday, October 28, 2011      5 comments

Tammy had to go into the hospital. She called and asked me to take care of her kids for her. Of course I did. At first, the arrangement was for me to be there to take care of everyone during the evenings. During the day, her dad was going... Read more
Today ... still emotional baggage I have to dump
Tuesday, October 25, 2011      5 comments

I am still not running. I'm not rushing back into it. My body will tell me when I'm ready. And I'm not yet. And I'm okay with that The only problem I have with it is the fact it's my emotional release. Helps keep my mind on an even keel... Read more
Today ... more emotional stuff you may want to skip
Sunday, October 23, 2011      7 comments

Right now my head is all over the place. A few reasons. The biggest have to do with the marathon, and the stress it put on my body. I also haven't been out running since. I am still recovering first. And then there's Terry.... There's alwa... Read more

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