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BLUEROSE73's Blogs

The first step to regaining my self-esteem
Monday, June 13, 2011      9 comments

I went running today. And had to keep convincing myself just a little farther. Keep pushing. The whole 5 miles was like that. In the last 60 seconds, I debated calling it quits. Then I realized 60 seconds! I can so kick that out and ... Read more
Is he seriously trying to drive me crazy???
Monday, June 13, 2011      8 comments

My room mate was his usual charming self again this weekend. Wouldn't talk to me. At all. Period. Left me sitting at home alone all weekend again. And this time he went with a group on a motorcycle road trip. I'm so done with his cra... Read more
Trying to get up 'n out
Sunday, June 12, 2011      1 comments

So today I forced myself into the shower. I went out to get a coffee. I was on the verge of not talking to Colin at all. Then decided he can't control my behavior like that. Or whatever. It will just be so much easier when this all blows ove... Read more
stuck in a funk today...
Saturday, June 11, 2011      6 comments

I'm trying to pick myself up out of a funk I've fallen into. It's not going so well. It's been building for the past few days. I've been sitting here working on reminding myself that my room mate is the way he is. He has absolutely no co... Read more
grounding exercises
Friday, June 10, 2011      5 comments

I see my computer screen I smell nothing really I taste scuzzy teeth. I brushed them. Must be effects of coffee I hear music I feel the keys of the keyboard I see my motivational posters, and Jillians face staring back at me I s... Read more
OMG! I finally get it.
Thursday, June 09, 2011      12 comments

I finally get it. I get why I am always hurting so much around Colin. And why it seems he has no empathy what so ever. And I finally get how I ended up here. ... Read more
June 8 Food - Photo Blog
Thursday, June 09, 2011      2 comments

Usual Breakfast. Banana and water. Had a few cookies through the day. Some at snack. Some at lunch... Read more
Personal Stuff that I've finally figured out...
Thursday, June 09, 2011      11 comments

This hurts to write. Heck, it even hurts to think about it. But I think it's time. This morning while I was wondering for the upteenth time why Colin was doing these things, it came to me. I have known for a while he believes the world... Read more
grounding and finding out what's wrong...
Wednesday, June 08, 2011      5 comments

I hear music I see my computer screen I smell my coffee I feel my butt in my chair I taste the vanilla stevia from my coffee. I hear Ken coming in, and Madeleine on the phone I see my hard hat, and my water bottle I smell my cof... Read more
Update on what happened at the BAD Rodeo and all that Jazz
Wednesday, June 08, 2011      3 comments

Well, yesterday I got a phone call from Keith. He's the guy who started the whole Bikers Against Diabetes group. There's a lot of history here that I won't really get into right now. Let's just say I was asked to be on the board. Within a mo... Read more
Wednesday, June 08, 2011      5 comments

My room mate was being a bit strange yesterday. He sent me a few text messages. I'm not sure if he is still very angry, or if he's trying to get over it and doesn't know how. Anyhow, I just let them blow past me yesterday. I responded,... Read more
June 7 Food - Photo Blog
Wednesday, June 08, 2011      2 comments

Breakfast - Banana and water. And coffee too. ... Read more
Today's kick in the butt....
Tuesday, June 07, 2011      4 comments

... or not so much. I read an article today about over training. I have been worried about this for some time now. I think I'll back off. Especially now that I'm going to be pushing so much harder to reach the next level. My train... Read more
Today's Reflection
Tuesday, June 07, 2011      1 comments

When things go wrong don't go with them. - Elvis Presley, rock idol This is one that I really need to work on. I let my room mate's mood really affect me. Far more than I should. I have always known I'm very empathetic. Y... Read more
June 6 Food - Photo Blog
Tuesday, June 07, 2011      2 comments

Breakfast - A Banana and some Water Lunch - A Salad with Romain Lettuce, Spinach, Hard Boiled Eggs (... Read more

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