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    BLUEROSE73   121,997
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Today

Wednesday, April 21, 2010      2 comments

I sent John a message today. Laid it all out on the line. Let him know how I feel. Let him know what I want, and what I am willing to do. I have a bad feeling he will pretend he hasn't read it, hoping I won't bring it up again. I tol... Read more

Feeling kinda down today...

Tuesday, April 20, 2010      6 comments

I am feeling kinda down today. I really feel lonely. I miss John. I know. I need to focus on me and getting to work and taking care of myself and my kids. It doesn't change the fact I miss him. I miss having someone to cuddle up next... Read more

I really need to believe in myself again...

Tuesday, April 20, 2010      6 comments

I ended up running into a judge from the dance competition on Sunday. He asked me what was wrong this weekend. After a bit of a talk, he informed me why my scores were so low. He had never seen me so disconnected when I was dancing. Ap... Read more

Competition Day today

Sunday, April 18, 2010      3 comments

Well today was competition day. The dance felt great. However, I got my lowest marks ever. Not really sure why. We will check the video. That just added to my bad mood today. He couldn't make it for my competition. I finally knew for ... Read more

Today

Thursday, April 15, 2010      4 comments

Well, there is still so much. I am so overwhelmed. If I stay in Calgary, I need to earn about $3000/mo to meet my basic bills. If I leave back to Saskatchewan, I could almost get by on $1000. Okay, more like $1500 and I could get by, includi... Read more

Photo's

Wednesday, April 14, 2010      13 comments

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Tonight's thoughts.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010      6 comments

Well, I told Bruce I really need my space. I told him how I feel, and how confused I am. I also told him if someday we come back together, we need the space first to find out if we want to come back together. My other friend is having iss... Read more

Any suggestions?

Tuesday, April 13, 2010      9 comments

He still isn't really talking to me. Lots of small talk, but nothing important. I sent him a message today telling him how lonely I am, especially since he won't talk to me. I don't really know how to get through to him. I don't mean small ... Read more

Sorry, more ranting.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010      6 comments

Well, I have done a lot of thinking today. I have also spent some time with local girlfriends on the phone. I think I have some idea about how to move forward. No matter what happens with my friend, Bruce and I need to go through with thi... Read more

More confusion...

Monday, April 12, 2010      7 comments

Well, its a new day. My confusion is still growing. Bruce was trying to win me back again last night. I had to tell him that although I was sticking around for a while, that didn't mean I was going to stop talking to my other friend. He ... Read more

Just needing to blog for a bit...

Sunday, April 11, 2010      6 comments

I am so confused right now. I guess I should start off by stating that I have been off my strict tracking and running for the past few months - work, no internet, and when I did have internet, the connection was too slow to even track my ... Read more

One year later...

Wednesday, March 17, 2010      8 comments

Well, the 15th of March was my one year anniversary on Spark. Looking back, I would have to say it's been a successful year. I did reach my original goal of 195lbs. I am still looking to loose more. I need to really sit down and decide... Read more

Some Photo's of my Road Trip

Tuesday, March 09, 2010      10 comments

Photos from the Harlequin Concert we went to in Brandon Manitoba. Read more

Hello again...

Monday, March 08, 2010      11 comments

Well, I know I have been hit and miss for a long time. I am still watching what I eat. My fitness has fallen to the wayside, but I did get up early this morning and went running. Still travelling, so things are still unsettled. They unfortun... Read more

Time to Celebrate

Thursday, February 18, 2010      12 comments

I got on the scale this morning and it actually dipped to 195. I figure it is actually closer to about 197 - it's not digital. Well, it doesn't really matter. What matters is that the scale hit my original goal weight. I have since lowered ... Read more


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