WILLEYDEBORAH's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=WILLEYDEBORAH WILLEYDEBORAH's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Here I go again http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6375484 Well I'm going to try to tackle this again. I feel like such a quitter. I hate that I have such an addiction to food. It literally is like having a drug addiction. It seems like I just keep chasing the food. Once I get started on certain foods I just can't seem to stop. I don't know why it was so much easier for me to quit using drugs than to quit eating all this junk food. I feel like my will power and strength just aren't as good as they should be. I keep telling myself I know I can do this... Thu, 15 Jun 2017 10:56:48 EST Busy day http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6167802 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/83ffe103-1a82-4854-9e0c-ded99c3be88f.jpg"> I don't think I have had such a busy day in a long time. It felt so good to finish my garden today. It left me with a feeling of accomplishment. I have been working really hard to eat healthy and to drink more water. I think tomorrow I will make it a goal to put clothes away, clean up kitchen, and vacuum. Then I will go help my mom with her garage sale prep. All I all it has been a good day. Sat, 21 May 2016 22:17:45 EST Realizing my temptations http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6161764 I went to my care facilitator today and found out that I have gained back all but one pound that I worked so hard to loose. I knew it was happening bc once my mom came back from FL I have been going over to her house to help her out. While there I started to have a Diet Coke here and there then I found myself buying a 12 pack. I allowed my addiction to get in the way of my success. I know that bc of my addiction there are some things that I absolutely cannot be around bc I just don't have the... Thu, 12 May 2016 21:33:39 EST Pain,pain,pain http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6102484 I have been debating all night whether or not to go swimming tomorrow because my lower back hurts so bad. I know in my heart that I need to get up and go. I guess I will have to make myself do this! Mon, 22 Feb 2016 23:04:20 EST New adventures http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6094552 So today I finished up my scheduled physical therapy. So now I can close that door and open another one. I start going to the aquatic center here. I'm planning to go at least 2 days a week. They have a really nice therapy pool and they also have a competition pool. I'm so excited to start this new adventure. Fri, 12 Feb 2016 19:09:51 EST Why??? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6084228 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/5443d3fa-731b-4746-b3b8-a2ce5221c9e7.jpg"> Why are some days so easy to stick with the plan and others so hard? It feels like I take 3 steps forward and two steps back. I have to come up with something to help me stick to it. Sometimes I feel like my will power is to weak. Self control is such a battle. It's almost like my bipolar takes over. I'm either on a successful role or a downhill slide. Why can't I find a happy medium and stick to it? ... Sun, 31 Jan 2016 19:59:31 EST Dealing with program interruption http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6072402 Last night I thought I was going to get a good nights sleep. Then at one o'clock in the morning my son comes in and says he's spending the night. After I get back to sleep, at 3 o'clock in the morning my daughter comes in after work and said she's going to spend the night. So I laid in the bed for about another hour and couldn't go back to sleep so I decided I might as well get it. Even though I'm tired and I have things that I have to do I'm going to have to push myself through this day. I c... Mon, 18 Jan 2016 06:57:13 EST Indulgence http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6072027 Today I did a lot of housework and used a lot of calories so I decided to go ahead and indulge this evening probably a little more than I should have. This evening my son came over it was really nice to see him so we had pizza and I probably ate a couple more pieces than I should have. But that's okay this doesn't happen very often and I did a lot of work today so hopefully tomorrow I'll be right back on track again. Sun, 17 Jan 2016 18:54:21 EST Eating some place other than home http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6071107 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/9a935c18-7705-4867-bdcb-d9429bf6a478.jpg"> I went to my friends Chinese restaurant today. Everything looks so good and I usually get a little bit of this and that but I knew if I did that I would be blowing my diet. So much sauce on everything and mayonnaise on salad stuff and I just couldn't do it. So I exercised discipline. I had one cup of chicken noodle soup and some pineapple. I also tried to try something different at the salad bar. I go... Sat, 16 Jan 2016 14:54:03 EST Making adjustments http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6070329 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/41149c2e-8479-4a74-a813-8b5d0949b509.jpg"> I woke up later than usual this morning then found out that my cat chewed my phone charger and also chewed my earbuds. I was so angry I couldn't believe it. That stuff is just too expensive to keep buying and my phone was at 35%. So I got up made my bed, took a shower, and walked across the street to QD to buy another charger and come home and charge my phone. I figured well there went my morning just... Fri, 15 Jan 2016 15:34:15 EST Positive thinking http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6069616 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/eb2a586b-3b79-4196-90ab-401524d1cc30.jpg"> I had a good day today without the exception of a terrible call with social security. Before I got off of the phone the lady that I was talking to had me in tears. All I wanted her to do was explain something to me and instead she started yelling at me and telling me that I would just have to come in there if I want to know anything else. I started getting a little huffy because usually I would go off... Thu, 14 Jan 2016 19:23:14 EST Strong beginning http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6068857 I got up at 4:00am this morning and started my plans for the day. It was a really good feeling to have a clear and positive mind. I walked twice today for 10 minutes each time. I was able to get my housework done and spend some play time with my cat. I just hope I can keep up this pace each day. I know it will get better. Wed, 13 Jan 2016 21:43:05 EST Starting over http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6064406 So today I began doing water therapy for my knees. I have also been working on my diet. I know I can do this. I just need to keep myself pumped up and think positive. I believe there is going to be a big change in me this year. Fri, 8 Jan 2016 22:03:15 EST New year, new me! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5862758 Well I can't even remember the last time that I posted anything in spark people. I know it has been a while. I am coming back and trying again you know what they say if it first you don't succeed try try again. So that's what I'm doing I'm actually missing all of my spark friends and my support team so this is a new year hopefully I will be able to stick to it and hopefully I can reach my goal weight. I also gave up drinking diet pop it's been a little over a week now so hopefully that will m... Mon, 26 Jan 2015 08:17:09 EST Depression and lonliness http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5695881 I have noticed that the lonelier I get or the more depressed I get, the more I eat. Emotional eating is such a struggle. I have to keep myself busy to avoid giving into temptation. It really bothers me when I want a certain something to eat but nothing I eat satisfies that craving. Sometimes I feel like I need to work more on my thinking than on the physical aspects of dieting. <BR> <BR> When it really gets hard is when I think about this as a lifestyle change. It seems so structured. ... Thu, 15 May 2014 18:23:00 EST Friends and choices http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5687601 I find that when I am with my friends there is a lot of temptation to eat foods that are not necessarily good for me. I am slowly learning how to say no to certain foods and my friends can eat whatever they want while I will find something healthy to eat. Sometimes I will suggest to my friends that maybe we should go somewhere where they serve healthier foods such as Subway. I think the changes in my food habits are starting to rub off on my friends. Yay for me. Sun, 4 May 2014 23:17:48 EST Temptation http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5686100 I had a really hard time today with several different occasions of coming in close contact with foods that just sounded so appealing. I was actually able to say no like three times today. But then tonight I tried to justify my right to get a Mc flurry because I have been doing so good the last few days. Unfortunately now I feel guilty I don't feel too well I'm getting ready to go to bed. <BR> Blessings 😴 Fri, 2 May 2014 23:09:00 EST There is nothing like feeling like you failed. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5443319 Well I am no longer working. I really enjoyed my job but my supervisor changed the schedule during the time my mom had open heart surgery and I knew nothing about it. He said that they were phasing out the front counter position so he would have to let me go. I talked to one of the other managers and she said that he told her that I quit. Later I called to the corporate office to get verification of income and I talked to the lady there. She said that it was entered that I was fired for ... Sat, 3 Aug 2013 13:52:26 EST New Job, New Attitude http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5347689 I started working as a waitress today. I haven't worked in about six years. They had me on the schedule for six hours and I made it. That included my walk to work. Thank God my mom stopped in right before I got off so she was able to give me a ride home. <BR> <BR> I hope this will help me to shed the pounds, plus I am getting an opportunity to interact with others. <BR> <BR> Wish me luck! Mon, 6 May 2013 17:48:52 EST My mom is joining me. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5343808 I know it has been a while since I have blogged anything. I have just been out of whack. My mom is now joining me on SP. Hopefully we can be a good support and encouragement for each other. <BR> <BR> I hope I can get back into the swing of things. I start work next week so that will give me an opportunity to get some exercise. <BR> <BR> <em>244</em> Thu, 2 May 2013 23:20:37 EST Week 6 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5259313 Down 14 lbs and feeling good. Thu, 21 Feb 2013 21:52:21 EST Two steps forward; One step back http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5255097 Well I weighed in today and actually gained 1 lb. You can imagine my disappointment. Then I thought I would measure myself and much to my surprise, I have lost a 1/2 in off of my waist, 2 in off of my hips, 3 in off of my thigh, and my upper arm stayed the same. <BR> <BR> So I gained a pound but since I am loosing in inches I am okay with it. Now I just have to work harder. <BR> <BR> <em>244</em> Mon, 18 Feb 2013 16:19:04 EST Back to the basics http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5252036 So, I have been out of the loop for a few days. I am ready to pick up and keep on going. Editor writes some of the most beautiful blogs and they really get me to thinking. Who am I to love myself any less than God. He loves me unconditionally. I am really struggling with my focus. I need to remember that I need to focus on myself and my attitudes instead of those in the world. <BR> <em>252</em> Fri, 15 Feb 2013 21:26:18 EST Craving... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5244524 I hate it when I work so hard and don't see results on the scale. I really blew it today so tomorrow back on track. Every now and then I feel like I have to have comfort foods to satisfy my cravings. <BR> <BR> I drink tons of water plus I take a fluid pill everyday. But I still have cellulitis around my lower legs. Today it isn't too bad but last night they were so swollen and painful. I am going to have to faithfully wear my support hose every day. <BR> <BR> Time for bed tomorrow will be... Sat, 9 Feb 2013 22:41:34 EST Great Day http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5242188 This has been a busy day. I started by going shopping this morning and I bought all healthy foods. I am so proud of myself because several times I contemplated buying comfort foods but then I told myself that I had a goal to make a lifelong change in the way that I eat. I am actually starting to feel like I am thin which helps me to eat as if I were thin. <BR> <BR> I even made salmon tonight and I never eat fish. Surprisingly it was pretty good. I feel like I am making tremendous prog... Thu, 7 Feb 2013 22:35:42 EST My son's birthday http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5236947 Today is my son's birthday. He is 18 years old. Unfortunately he and I do not get along at all. He has absolutely no respect for me whatsoever and he says things to me and calls me names that just cut through my heart. Besides the pain I experienced 18 years ago, today has to be the worst pain yet. I let him out of my car last night because I refuse to take the verbal abuse anymore. I don't deserve it and I don't have to take it. Until he realizes that he is throwing his life away on a... Mon, 4 Feb 2013 10:34:11 EST Not a great week http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5229910 My seventeen year old has been causing me grief this week. He technically doesn't live with me because he has chosen to roam the streets and do things he shouldn't be doing. When he comes to my home he upsets the entire atmosphere and my stress level shoots sky high. He will be 18 in a couple of days but thinks that living the life of a hustler is all he can do. I hope he wakes up before it is too late. <BR> <BR> The scales say I gained a pound this week. I think it is due to all of the... Wed, 30 Jan 2013 09:01:02 EST Learning to deal with stress http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5222298 I am on my journey down in weight and up in self esteem. I know that this is going to be a life long change for me. I have become a recluse due to being self conscious and embarrassed by my weight. I am seeking new friends through SP so I can make this work. It is hard to do things if you feel like you are all alone. I love the support I get from SP. Today was a very stressful day for me but I am trying to learn to overcome. I don't deal well with change and I get overwhelmed if I hav... Thu, 24 Jan 2013 22:13:35 EST I feel great! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5219148 Even though the scales don't necessarily say so, I have been told twice in the last two days that I looked like I was loosing weight. <BR> <BR> It really feels good when the people you least expect to say anything comment on how you look. <BR> <BR> <em>244</em> Tue, 22 Jan 2013 20:18:41 EST I blew it today! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5215956 There is nothing like being out and about and forgetting to take a snack with you. I got so hungry today and stopped at BK to get a whopper, fry, and shake. The worse part is that I sat in the parking lot contemplating it for almost 5min. before I decided to order. I could kick myself in the butt. I ate a whole days worth of calories in one meal. <em>46</em> Sun, 20 Jan 2013 19:04:56 EST Not so great today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5213672 Today was such a busy day that when I got home I went straight for the comfort foods. Bad Idea! <BR> I guess tomorrow I will have to skimp and exercise more to work off today. Fri, 18 Jan 2013 22:34:32 EST End of week 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5210885 Video diary of my weight loss. Thu, 17 Jan 2013 00:14:21 EST Getting close to the end of the week. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5209196 Well tomorrow marks one week for me. i am really nervous about my weigh in. Hopefully it wont be disappointing. "One day at a time" Tue, 15 Jan 2013 22:42:57 EST The Beginning of my Journey http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5207423 This is a motivational video to keep me working towards my goal. Mon, 14 Jan 2013 21:16:37 EST Exercise-Cardio for Seniors http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5207399 <em>362</em> Well this was a really good day. I had quite a bit of energy and I did some cardio and strength training to a program with Angie Miller. It was low impact for seniors. I was amazed at how I was able to do it, but I still am not in shape enough to do the whole thing. At least I tried. <BR> <BR> My daughter told me today that she was proud of me and it really made me feel good. I don't really see any results yet but I can feel changes taking place. <BR> <BR> I am so ready... Mon, 14 Jan 2013 21:01:38 EST Day 2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5200996 <em>46</em> Darn it! I hate falling off a horse but I am going to get right back on it. Today was a very stressful day but I have much more optimism about tomorrow. It is really hard getting started but I know I can do it. No matter which way it goes I refuse to <em>227</em> <BR> <BR> I will take it one day at a time. Thu, 10 Jan 2013 18:42:17 EST