VERSESTHATHURT's SparkPeople Blog VERSESTHATHURT's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Refocusing I'm not going to call this starting over, because I never really quit. I just sort of veered off the trail a little bit and lost sight of the finish line. <BR> <BR> It's been two months since I quit my 9-5 job and I've spent a lot more time doing self-care type things. <BR> <BR> We also went on a conference/vacation cruise and it was amazing. We had a wonderful time, but we ate tons of food and drank even more. We've back a little over a week and I think I'm still shedding water weight from... Wed, 3 Aug 2016 09:14:34 EST Frustrated So, as usual it's been awhile since I've been on here. Lots of things have happened. My husband got a great new job. I quit my day job less than a month ago and started freelancing full time. It also lets me spend more time with my mom. <BR> <BR> I'm still working on getting a schedule for myself in place, but I've done pretty well. I'm not sitting at a desk all day anymore, so I'm more active than ever. I'm also going to the gym a lot more than I have all year. I haven't really been exerc... Fri, 24 Jun 2016 08:58:01 EST March Measurements and Other Updates February was both good and bad. I did okay with exercise and eating. Just okay, not great. I did start some new habits, doing yoga Monday, Wednesday, and Friday when I wake up. Nothing crazy, just a 15ish minute stretch. On Tuesdays and Thursday mornings I'm going some kettlebell swings and some pilates rollups with a pilates ring. I went to Miami with The Husband at the beginning of the month for a conference he was speaking at. Met some awesome people (and some not so awesome people) and as... Tue, 1 Mar 2016 10:14:02 EST One Month So, I decided that every month I was going to do an official and measurements thing. <BR> <BR> Since January 1st, I’ve lost 2.4 pounds. Not great, but not terrible either. <BR> <BR> I’ve lost 1.5” around my waist! <BR> <BR> I’ve lost 1” around my hips! <BR> <BR> Thighs stayed the same. <BR> <BR> Upper arms stayed the same. <BR> <BR> I lost .5” from my calf. I’ve always had massive calfs (calves?) even when I was a significantly thinner teenager, so .5” is pretty good! <BR> <BR> And, I ... Tue, 2 Feb 2016 10:27:58 EST Gone, But not Forgotten I've missed you guys! I'm not going to into large amounts of detail about the last few months but I'll say this: <BR> I was sick a lot after I got my IUD, and between work stress and mom stress I've fallen off the wagon with my eating. Work is sort of getting back to normal now, but my mom's pulmonary fibrosis is entering the end stages and it's hard. She's on oxygen 24/7 and is basically couch bound. I thought I had built the skills up I needed to deal with all this, but I didn't use them. <... Fri, 1 Jan 2016 10:24:30 EST Things Life has been crazy. I'm still doing my class, but I only have a month left. Last weekend I relaunched my website (wrote all the code myself) and I'm hoping to start picking up some freelance work. <BR> <BR> I've gone off the wagon with my exercise for a few weeks because we were on vacation. The when we got back my mom was admitted to the hospital and stayed for a week. And I got sick again during all of this. <BR> <BR> So the situation with my mom is that her pulmonary fibrosis is progres... Thu, 10 Sep 2015 15:03:44 EST Still Here, Still Busy Sorry for the radio silence. I have been super ridiculously busy since starting the web design class. I've also been working on another baby quilt for a friend and that's another major time suck. <BR> <BR> And, I haven't been feeling 100% since I got the IUD. I'm getting better and I finally feel like my hormones are leveling out, but I gained eight pounds in the first month. I feel like a lot of it must have been water weight because I somehow magically lost four pounds between today and la... Thu, 30 Jul 2015 10:55:37 EST Long Time, No See Wow, I can't believe it's been over a month since I posted. <BR> <BR> So, what's been going on? I'm still on my six days a week at the gym workout plan, but it seems like at least once a week something has come up and I've missed a workout. I finally gave up completely on that one water aerobics instructor that I didn't like, and started going to yoga on those days, BUT, now she has some kind of injury and will be out indefinitely and that lady filling in on Saturday is great! So it's kind o... Thu, 16 Jul 2015 12:24:11 EST Focus I had a rough yoga class last night. I had a bad case of "nervous park squirrel" brain and just could not focus on what we were doing. It was so bad I had to stiffle a laugh when the teacher told us to do calf presses in dolphin. It was a "Are you kidding me?" laugh. <BR> <BR> Anyway after class she came up to me and hugged me and told me I looked great. It really meant a lot. She asked me how my week was and I told her it had been kind of crazy and that I had been slipping this week with my... Fri, 5 Jun 2015 10:16:25 EST Not Dead, Still Going I haven't posted a blog in awhile mostly because I just didn't feel like I had much to say. <BR> <BR> In general I feel good about how things are going. I'm losing weight again, roughly a pound a week. And after a really long time of losing two pound gaining two, I feel good about seeing the scale moving. <BR> <BR> Most weeks I'm working out six days a week, but for the most part I like what I'm doing and that makes it infinitely easier. <BR> <BR> Monday- a little cardio and strength train... Tue, 2 Jun 2015 10:00:10 EST PSA: Keep "the girls" under control! There's this lady that recently started coming to our water aerobics class and pretty much everyone is convinced she's either heavily medicated or not medicated enough. Like, I don't even know how to properly describe it. She's over enthusiastic to the point of being a distraction in class. She screams when she gets in the water when it's cold. She makes up her own moves when we're doing specific things the instructor is doing. <BR> <BR> She's also probably the most generously endowed woman... Wed, 13 May 2015 10:19:47 EST Losing My Favorite Instructor On Tuesday I found out that my favorite water aerobics instructor is leaving at the end of the month. She said it was never supposed to be a permanent gig that she was just there to help the gym get started. <BR> <BR> I can't handle three days a week with the instructor at the other location. First of all, major personality conflict, second she's not a real instructor and her classes are not as intense as I need, and third our city is in the middle of a major road construction project that m... Thu, 7 May 2015 12:26:04 EST Measure It All My measuring spoons and cups, and food scale came yesterday. It's been... interesting. I wanted to get all these things because I've been really concerned that I was eating more than I thought I was. So far, it looks like I was actually under estimating more often than over estimating. <BR> <BR> We had steaks for dinner last night, and I know I would have logged it as a 6 oz steak. It was 4.84 oz. When I measured out my cereal this morning, I noticed I've been pretty spot on with my almond m... Mon, 4 May 2015 09:56:17 EST Portion Control & Calorie Count Confession I've been back on track with food logging for awhile now. But I have a confession to make. I'm an estimator. When I cook and when I portion my food out I estimate the sizes. <BR> <BR> And I think that was fine when I first started losing weight, because it worked. But I think it might also be part of the reason my weight loss has slowed now. <BR> <BR> I need to be more precise. <BR> <BR> Part of the reason I've been an estimator was that I didn't have all the proper tools I needed to meas... Thu, 30 Apr 2015 10:47:39 EST Weekend in St.Louis The Husband and I drove up to St.Louis Friday and it rained almost the entire way. And it was unexpectedly colder there than in Memphis. We got to our hotel about 6 and decided to go to the Schlafly Bottleworks for dinner. We both got burgers with their house made beer cheese. The husband got a flight (beer sampler) and I had a Radler (their kolsch beer mixed with blood orange san pellegrino). <BR> <BR> We made it through the St. Louis zoo Saturday morning before it started raining. We walke... Tue, 28 Apr 2015 11:02:13 EST Self Care Next weekend The Husband and I are going to St.Louis for a long weekend. Between now and then I'm going to do some nice and much needed things for myself. <BR> <BR> Saturday after water aerobics I'm going to get my eyes checked and get new glasses and sun glasses. Then, I'm getting a pedicure. Being barefoot in front of people other than my husband and cats at yoga Sunday made me realize it was time for some warm weather foot care! Then, on Wednesday my aunt is cutting my hair again for me. ... Thu, 16 Apr 2015 13:51:52 EST Weekend Workouts I've been trying to go to the Saturday morning water aerobics class even though I'm not crazy about the instructor at the location near my house. At class Thursday night (at the other location where the instructor is awesome) we had a new zumba instructor observing class and getting tips. So Saturday the lady that was observing subbed for the Saturday morning class and she was great! It was her first time doing a water aerobics class but she was infinitely better than the regular lady at that... Mon, 13 Apr 2015 09:25:22 EST PT and The Side Effect of Weight Loss I called my insurance yesterday to check on what they'll pay on PT just so I wouldn't have any surprises when I got there for the appointment. Insurance will pay 100% after my deductible has been met. As of the phone call I was $136 away from meeting my $2500 deductible. Most of which is for all the tests the hematologist ran, that I still haven't seen bills for. <BR> <BR> They set me up for appointments twice a week for the next three weeks. We'll decide after that if I need to do the other... Thu, 2 Apr 2015 10:45:50 EST The Plan, Hopefully My first physical therapy appointment is this afternoon. Provided that my insurance is actually going to pay for a few visits I'm going to propose going to actual PT once a week and doing two days on my own at my gym. <BR> <BR> If my insurance won't pay for any I can't really afford more than one or two visits out of pocket. And even if my insurance will pay, that's time off work not making any money, but paying money out. And I'm trying to pay off debt, not make more. <BR> <BR> I've had tw... Wed, 1 Apr 2015 09:39:01 EST Busy Active Weekend Friday night I went over to my BFF's house to play games with some friends. We played Betrayal at House on the Hill twice. And I didn't get to bed until 1 am. <BR> <BR> But, I still got up for water aerobics at 9 Saturday morning. And... the instructor never showed up. The Saturday morning class is with the instructor I'm really not crazy about. There were a handful of other people there so we just decided to do class without the instructor. Apparently, we were supposed to know class was can... Mon, 30 Mar 2015 10:29:09 EST Femoroacetabular Impingement (FAI) That's what I have, the cam type. Basically for whatever reason the ball of my femur doesn't fit right in the joint and over time the friction has caused a bone spur. <BR> <BR> Treatment options: Lose weight. <BR> <BR> I got a little frustrated because the first thing the doctor offered me was a referral to a nutritionist. I pretty much said thank, but no thanks. I told him I was working on weight loss with the referring doctor and that I had already lost about 70 pounds in two years. <BR> ... Fri, 27 Mar 2015 13:46:23 EST Just What I Needed To Hear I didn't want to get up this morning at 5am when my alarm went off. I mean, who really ever wants to get up at 5am, right? I stayed there for a few minutes contemplating how much another 45 minutes of sleep would really help, and then got up. <BR> <BR> I was aiming for twelve laps in the pool this morning and was a little over halfway through when I stopped between laps to catch my breath. The guy in the lane next to me said something, but I couldn't hear him because I wear headphones and li... Wed, 25 Mar 2015 09:38:30 EST Con Review and Doctor Updates So, I went to the convention Friday and Saturday and had a great time! Most of these people last saw me 70+ pounds ago so I kept getting stopped in the hallways by people telling me how great I looked. And that was nice until... <BR> <BR> This catty mean wench that I really try to avoid stopped me Saturday and asked about my weight loss in a not so nice way. It was that "I'm going to compliment you, but not" kind of thing. So she said I looked great and asked what I was doing. We're not frie... Tue, 24 Mar 2015 11:25:06 EST To Yoga or Not to Yoga (and a swim update) So, I've really been wanting to try a yoga class at the gym. I'm pretty apprehensive about it because I know doing a dvd a home isn't the same as going to a class. Also, the idea that the yoga instructor might be as untrained as one of the water aerobics instructors is... worries me. <BR> <BR> I was thinking about going to the Sunday morning class yesterday, but that got derailed by stuff that happened on Saturday. Nothing bad. My mom was helping me with my costume and we had an unexpected ... Mon, 16 Mar 2015 11:00:15 EST Fat Fan I've never talked much about this here, but I'm kind of a geek. I love things like Firefly and Doctor Who. I even spent several years running different departments for our local big scifi/fantasy convention until I got burned out and tired of the politics and the push back every time I tried to update things and make stuff better. <BR> <BR> I've always wanted to try my hand at costuming...but when you're obese it's hard enough to find nice looking regular clothes much less incredibly specifi... Thu, 12 Mar 2015 09:57:38 EST Challenge Day 1, and weekend whatnot A few days ago I challenged myself to track my food and spin the wheel every day in March. Yesterday was March 1st and we (me, my mom, aunts, and my cousins) got together for a girls lunch and to belatedly celebrate my grandmother's 77th birthday. We had finger food and, chocolate fondue, and lemon cake, and champagne. So... it was difficult to accurately track everything, but I got it all listed even if the counts are a little questionable. <BR> <BR> Saturday morning I got up about eight an... Mon, 2 Mar 2015 10:07:51 EST Better I can't say I'm 100% today, but overall... I'm feeling better. It occurred to me this morning that I'd been off my vitamin D for a few days too and I'm sure that didn't help anything. <BR> <BR> So yesterday I flip flopped all day about whether or not I was going to go to the aquafit class by the house. Ultimately I decided ex-friend could screw herself and I wasn't going to let her stand in my way. It ended up being moot though because traffic was horrid and by the time I got to the house I ... Fri, 27 Feb 2015 10:36:56 EST Pity Party I know part of this is just hormonal and in a few days all I'll be over it, but right now I'm cranky and tired and frustrated. <BR> <BR> I'm cranky and tired. I haven't been sleeping well this past week or so and part of that is because I still have way more sinus drainage than I really should. And the husband's cat has been waking me up the past few night by climbing/walking all over me. And, locking her out of the bedroom isn't an option. <BR> <BR> I'm frustrated because I'm not happy at ... Thu, 26 Feb 2015 10:02:41 EST A Wash This week has been a complete wash. Late Sunday night through most of Monday we got about an inch of ice. Luckily it was sleet so it didn't really stick to the power lines and very few people lost power. But, I was pretty much iced in until yesterday. It's one thing to be home from work, but it's something completely different to be stuck in the house! <BR> <BR> So, I missed my Monday morning swim. I missed aquafit on Tuesday, and it was about ten degrees this morning so I didn't get up to g... Thu, 19 Feb 2015 09:56:14 EST Ghost of Friendships Past There was a girl in middle school and through most of high school that I was really close to. Not my BFF, but we were very close and spent a lot of time together. And the relationship was...very toxic. It took me a really long time to see it and long story short I went no contact during the beginning of our senior year. It was hard and painful and it shaped all of my relationships for years afterwards. It's been almost fifteen years and as I found out tonight it still hurts. <BR> <BR> Tonigh... Tue, 27 Jan 2015 22:16:46 EST Cranky Headache Day I did twelve laps Saturday and was kind of annoyed because the water was a little cloudy. I think it's because they've never really cleaned the floor around the pool since they opened so it looks kind of muddy. Like they tracked junk in during construction and just never cleaned it. Also, the pool cleaners have been really hit or miss for the last week and some of the other swimmers are starting to complain. <BR> <BR> This morning the water was even more cloudy and it was a strong sweet smel... Mon, 26 Jan 2015 10:25:07 EST Aquafit in Review I went to the other new location of my gym last night and took the aquafit class. I was super apprehensive about going because: scary new thing, people, bathing suit in front of people, and mostly dumb introvert reasons. <BR> <BR> But, I put my big girl panties on (or I guess my big girl bathing suit) and went. And I'm so glad I did. Aside from the fact that it was an great workout and I was sore before I even left the building, I had a great time. <BR> <BR> The other people in the class we... Wed, 21 Jan 2015 09:59:43 EST Status Quo It's weird how the more you change about yourself, the more you become unsatisfied with other areas of your life. <BR> <BR> I've been talking about it for awhile, I 'm sure I mentioned it here around this time last year, that I was considering a career change, but it would require learning some new skills. It came to head last week when my current job (I've been here almost seven years) cut my sick time down from 40 hours to 24. Everyone here is pissed about it. <BR> <BR> And I decided I c... Tue, 13 Jan 2015 10:06:03 EST Time Off I decided to take a few days off from the gym because my sinus funk wasn't getting any better, but it was definitely getting worse. I still didn't feel all that bad, but was starting to get nose bleeds. I went to clinic in our grocery store (it's like a minor med, but faster, and with just nurse practitioners) on New Year's Day. Anyway, she said I was lucky that it hadn't moved into my chest as bad as it was. So, I've been on some pretty hefty antibiotics and that combined with TMI have had m... Mon, 5 Jan 2015 10:38:55 EST Paddling Along I totally spaced on weighing in last week. And probably did a bit too much snacking this weekend. <BR> <BR> The last two days of my long weekend were not too great. I don't feel bad, but I'm pretty sure I have a sinus infection. I'm mostly okay during the day, but overnight the drainage is really bad (I had a sore throat yesterday from it) and the congestion is really bad when I first wake up. And, then there's the telltale funky colored snot. And I've had a few nose bleeds. Not gushers, but... Mon, 29 Dec 2014 10:13:31 EST Swim! My new gym opened up Friday afternoon. And, Saturday morning I tweaked my back. But I was determined and figured swimming might actually help my back, plus there's a whirlpool at the new gym. <BR> <BR> So my first go up the lane, I guess I thought I was racing someone because I was out of breath by the time I made it to the other side. So I just stopped took a deep breath and told myself it didn't matter how long it took me to get across the pool. I did six laps in twelve minutes and was poo... Mon, 22 Dec 2014 09:52:35 EST Info Dump I haven't written since the first of the month. I was super busy at work trying to learn to be the backup title clerk. It's a lot of detailed stuff to try and remember, and after two weeks of notes and working the desk with the title clerk I still don't know it all. But I worked the desk by myself for two days while she was gone and didn't screw anything up too horribly. <BR> <BR> Our dryer (it's only three years old and we just bought a new washer!) broke over the weekend. We bought a part ... Thu, 18 Dec 2014 11:42:05 EST New Month, Fresh Start Whoa, December! Where did this year go? So, I need to mail my Planet Fitness membership cancellation on Wednesday. My new gym is supposed to be opening soon. The other location they're building here might be open by this weekend, and I think mine is about a week behind theirs. I cannot wait! Which is kind of funny since I've had no motivation to go to the gym for about a month. But I think December is going to be a good month. <BR> <BR> I'm feeling a little wonky because my thyroid medicine ... Mon, 1 Dec 2014 11:26:12 EST Weekend & Phentermine Take 2 Despite my freakout over the blood work and referral on Friday I had a good weekend. I told my husband Friday and he took it pretty well. I was afraid about what it would do for his anxiety, but aside from being quiet he seemed fine. I was very, "we don't know what's going on, so let's not get all freaked out over nothing." I did tell him specifically that I didn't want to tell my parents. I tell my mom pretty much everything, but again, I don't want to her having any added stress over somet... Mon, 24 Nov 2014 09:13:51 EST Don't Panic I was poking around on the web portal for my doctor's office this morning because I had gotten the automated email that my lab results from my appointment Monday had been added. There was a referral to a doctor listed that we hadn't talked about at the appointment. <BR> <BR> If what's on the website is correct, they're referring me to a hematologist/oncologist for abnormal blood chemistry. The last few times I've been in my WBC stuff has been wonky. Not like crazy bad, but not right. <BR> <... Fri, 21 Nov 2014 11:03:43 EST Doctor Visit Of course by the time I get to the doctor my rash is looking much better. Isn't that how it always goes? He thinks it might be eczema or psoriasis so he's sending me back to another dermatologist. <BR> <BR> Despite the fact that I gained back half of what I lost on the phentermine and haven't lost much since then (mostly because I've been a massive slacker), he was still pleased. He said it's not unusual to gain some of it back, particularly since I lost so much on it. He wrote me another sc... Wed, 19 Nov 2014 09:35:52 EST Surprise Snow! When I turned my alarm off this morning I could see the window ledge and the a/c unit had a coating of ice. Which... did seem weird as it wasn't supposed to rain or anything last night, though it is unusually cold for Memphis right now. <BR> <BR> When I got out of the shower and turned the news on they were doing the traffic report and there were accidents everywhere, because it snowed last night! Not a lot, mostly just a dusting. But we weren't expecting any wintery precip so the sand truck... Thu, 13 Nov 2014 10:59:26 EST Weekend of Meh and SAD It's been TOM and I've been very meh for the last few days and have had very little motivation to do anything but sit on my butt and eat candy. I'm still fighting the mystery rash on my arm too. So, it was pretty much gone Friday, but then Saturday I had a new rash in the same area, though I suspect that might be a reaction to the tea tree oil I was using to dry up the first rash. Because I can't win when it comes to skin stuff. I'm now rotating between benedryl cream and cortisone cream. <BR... Mon, 10 Nov 2014 09:48:52 EST Swimming! So I went to the LA Fitness preview center after work and signed me and The Husband up. They waived the sign-on fee, but I had to pay first and last month fees for both of us, so $120. They don't have an official opening date set, but they're thinking beginning to mid December. They're not open quite as much as PF on the week days, but longer on the weekends. And as long as the gym is open, the pool is open. <BR> <BR> I'll probably cancel my PF membership the first week in December, since I ... Thu, 6 Nov 2014 10:20:06 EST On Washers and Rashes So we knew our washer was dying. It came with the house and was old. The knob broke the day we moved in and my dad "fixed it" so it was at least usable. A few years ago a hose broke, and water went everywhere but we weren't in a financial position to replace it, so my dad just replaced the hose for us. But, two weeks ago it started screaming during the spin cycle on larger loads. It wasn't out of balance, it was just... angry. So I started doing really small loads just trying to get us throug... Tue, 4 Nov 2014 10:13:24 EST Weekend (so much stairs, garden work, and attempted compost theft) I didn't go to the gym this weekend, but I did get plenty of physical activity. On Saturday I was the event photographer for an all day tech conference. My fitbit tracked 14 flights of stairs climbed, and about 4.6 miles walked. And let my tell you by the time I got home I felt every step. We left the house about 6:30 Saturday morning and got home about 7:30 that night. I went to bed about 8:30 and slept for like twelve hours. <BR> <BR> Sunday morning The Husband and I had brunch at Celtic ... Mon, 3 Nov 2014 09:43:50 EST Moving Along I didn't make it to the gym or do anything intentionally exercise like this weekend. BUT, I did spend a little over an hour gardening! I cleared all the weeds out of the front flower bed, trimmed my smoke bush, and my wisteria which is looking a little scraggly this year. I continued the on-going epic battle with an oak sapling the took hold inbetween the house and the air conditioner. I think what I tried this time might actually kill it. I also started cleaning up the back raised bed that I... Tue, 28 Oct 2014 10:05:37 EST Squirrel! Something I read this morning on a sparkfriend's blog struck a major chord with me. STEPH-KNEE mentioned often talking about diet and exercise plans but not usually following through with them. I have this problem, and not just in relation to weightloss. <BR> <BR> It's why it took me over a year to finish re-doing my office at home, why I have one mostly knitted sock, a foot stool in my garage that is completely disassembled and conveniently sitting on top of another unfinished project (an ... Fri, 24 Oct 2014 10:08:34 EST I Like Dirt I'm terrible with houseplants (except for my office a work which looks vaguely jungle like) but I love our door gardening. Unfortunately I don't do it very often. <BR> We bough our house seven-ish years ago and I had grand plans. My dad and I even spend like two weekends digging up bushes and planting stuff in the front yard. Then I hurt my back. I had two herniated discs and life sucked for a long time health wise. <BR> <BR> Then about four years ago I convinced the husband to help me build... Thu, 23 Oct 2014 11:36:15 EST All the Things The last two weeks have been a complicated. <BR> <BR> My husband was offered a job with a start-up that would have been a huge pay bump. He had more or less decided to take the job, but then found out the company only had for sure funding until March. All this was happening right around when it was time for his yearly review at work. He decided to stay, and they gave him a 10% raise and a yet-to-be-determined title change. So it's not what he would have gotten at the start-up, but it's somet... Tue, 21 Oct 2014 10:39:48 EST