TWEETYKC00's SparkPeople Blog TWEETYKC00's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Tuesday's Tickle "Normal is nothing more than a cycle on a washing machine." <BR> <BR> <BR> Whoopi Goldberg Tue, 22 Jul 2014 08:07:06 EST Monday's Silly "Aim high, and you won't shoot your foot off." <BR> <BR> <BR> Phyllis Diller Mon, 21 Jul 2014 06:11:08 EST Sunday's Thought All of us do not have equal talent, but all of us should have an equal opportunity to develop our talents." <BR> <BR> <BR> John F. Kennedy Sun, 20 Jul 2014 13:55:59 EST Saturday's Silly What has 12 legs, six eyes, 3 tails and can't see? <BR> <BR> <BR> 3 blind mice! Sat, 19 Jul 2014 12:54:51 EST Friday's Funny You never really know how good your memory really is until you try to forget something. Fri, 18 Jul 2014 06:21:54 EST Thursday's Funny How do bees dispose of their honey? <BR> <BR> <BR> They cell it. Thu, 17 Jul 2014 06:26:25 EST Wednesday's Wisdom "Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth. the air and you." <BR> <BR> <BR> Langston Hughes Wed, 16 Jul 2014 08:36:22 EST Tuesday's Tickle "Somebody asked what I wanted on my gravestone. I'm just going to put: 'Glad I Could Help.'" <BR> <BR> <BR> Dick Van Dyke Tue, 15 Jul 2014 09:42:57 EST Monday's Silly "A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it." <BR> <BR> <BR> Jerry Seinfeld Mon, 14 Jul 2014 06:39:44 EST Sunday's Thought "Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier." <BR> <BR> <BR> Mother Teresa Sun, 13 Jul 2014 11:33:46 EST Saturday's Silly "I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch." <BR> <BR> <BR> Gilda Radner Sat, 12 Jul 2014 10:32:33 EST Friday's Funny In the winter the dog wears his coat. In the summer he wears his coat and pants. Fri, 11 Jul 2014 06:53:38 EST Thursday's Tickle Did you visit the origami store? <BR> <BR> <BR> That's ok, it folded anyway. Thu, 10 Jul 2014 06:08:13 EST Wednesday's Wisdom "Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do." <BR> <BR> <BR> Ben Franklin Wed, 9 Jul 2014 07:11:46 EST Tuesday's Tickle "I used to be Snow White, but I drifted." <BR> <BR> <BR> Mae West Tue, 8 Jul 2014 06:41:02 EST Monday's Silly Why does a dog wag his tail? <BR> <BR> <BR> He couldn't find anyone to do it for him. Mon, 7 Jul 2014 07:08:38 EST Sunday's Thought "Labor is prior to, and independent of, capital. Capital is only the fruit of labor, and could never have existed if labor had not first existed. Labor is the superior of capital, and deserves much the higher consideration." <BR> <BR> <BR> Abraham Lincoln Sun, 6 Jul 2014 09:51:44 EST Saturday's Thought "I never considered a difference of opinion in politics, in religion, in philosophy, as cause for withdrawing from a friend." <BR> <BR> <BR> Thomas Jefferson Sat, 5 Jul 2014 15:01:06 EST Friday's Thought "I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread." <BR> <BR> <BR> Bill Cosby Fri, 4 Jul 2014 07:16:05 EST Thursday's Tickle Which witch is good when it's dark? <BR> <BR> A lights-witch! Thu, 3 Jul 2014 07:03:28 EST Wednesday's Wisdom "There's only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self." <BR> <BR> <BR> Aldous Huxley Wed, 2 Jul 2014 06:40:25 EST Tuesday's Tickle "The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was a genius." <BR> <BR> <BR> Sid Caesar Tue, 1 Jul 2014 06:34:39 EST Monday's Silly "If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets." <BR> <BR> <BR> Mel Brooks Mon, 30 Jun 2014 06:18:05 EST Sunday's Thought :When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure." <BR> <BR> <BR> Peter Marshall Sun, 29 Jun 2014 12:07:35 EST Saturday's Thought "My fashion philosophy is, if you're not covered in dog hair, your life is empty." <BR> <BR> <BR> Elayne Boosler Sat, 28 Jun 2014 15:04:19 EST Friday's Funny What happened to the dog that swallowed the firefly? <BR> <BR> <BR> It barked with de-light! Fri, 27 Jun 2014 06:24:49 EST Thursday's Tickle Most love triangles turn into wreck - tangles before long. Thu, 26 Jun 2014 06:29:42 EST Wednesday's Wisdom "One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other." <BR> <BR> <BR> Jane Austin, Emma Wed, 25 Jun 2014 07:40:38 EST Tuesday's Tickle "My boyfriend and I live together, which means we don't have sex - ever. Now that the milk is free, we've both become lactose intolerant." <BR> <BR> <BR> Margaret Cho Tue, 24 Jun 2014 08:38:24 EST Monday's Silly Why couldn't the pony talk? <BR> <BR> <BR> Because he was a little horse! Mon, 23 Jun 2014 07:28:42 EST Sunday's Thought "We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools." <BR> <BR> <BR> Martin Luther King Jr. Sun, 22 Jun 2014 11:32:18 EST Another Long Day Gearing up for another day at the garage sale. I can't wait until this is all over. Hoping to be back to normal soon. Have a good day everyone. Sat, 21 Jun 2014 04:51:17 EST Friday, It's gonna be a long one. It's been a long week and it will be a longer weekend. Been setting up for a rummage sale. I am beat! I won't be able to spark much for the next few days. I hope everyone has a good weekend. Fri, 20 Jun 2014 00:13:32 EST Thursday's Tickle "I found a money back guarantee on a beauty cream. Rushed down to the store. They took one look at me and paid me in advance." <BR> <BR> <BR> Phyllis Diller Thu, 19 Jun 2014 07:36:24 EST Wednesday's Wisdom "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." <BR> <BR> <BR> Ralph Waldo Emerson Wed, 18 Jun 2014 16:37:10 EST Tuesday's Tickle "Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other." <BR> <BR> <BR> Ann Landers Tue, 17 Jun 2014 07:43:16 EST MOnday's Silly The difference between learning to drive a car and learning to play golf is that in one case you hit everything and in the other you hit nothing. Mon, 16 Jun 2014 06:00:22 EST Father's Day Thought "I want to congratulate all the men out there who are working diligently to be good fathers whether they are stepfathers, or biological fathers or just spiritual fathers." <BR> <BR> <BR> T.D. Jakes Sun, 15 Jun 2014 11:31:48 EST Saturday's Silly "I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure." <BR> <BR> <BR> Mae West Sat, 14 Jun 2014 09:27:23 EST Friday's Funny A moth leads an awful life. It spends the summer in a fur coat and the winter in a bathing suit. Fri, 13 Jun 2014 06:18:44 EST Thursday's Tickle To speed is human, to get caught, a fine. Thu, 12 Jun 2014 06:46:00 EST Wednesday's Wisdom "The keys to patience are acceptance and faith. Accept things as they are, and look realistically at the world around you. Have faith in yourself and in the direction you have chosen." <BR> <BR> <BR> Ralph Marston Wed, 11 Jun 2014 07:18:01 EST Tuesday's Tickle "I don't have pet peeves; I have whole kennels of irritation." <BR> <BR> <BR> Whoopi Goldberg Tue, 10 Jun 2014 06:22:16 EST Monday's Funny "My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee." <BR> <BR> <BR> Phyllis Diller Mon, 9 Jun 2014 06:54:53 EST Sunday's Thought "What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you." <BR> <BR> <BR> Ralph Waldo Emerson Sun, 8 Jun 2014 10:42:37 EST Saturday's Silly Thought "Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." <BR> <BR> <BR> Jim Carrey Sat, 7 Jun 2014 17:01:50 EST Friday's Funny A Cat is said to have nine lives, a pedestrian only the one! Fri, 6 Jun 2014 06:33:08 EST Thursday's Thought "Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble , but reasonable confidence in your own powers, you cannot be successful or happy." <BR> <BR> <BR> Norman Vincent Peale Thu, 5 Jun 2014 07:08:22 EST Hump Day Happy When rain falls, does it ever get up? <BR> <BR> In dew time. Wed, 4 Jun 2014 07:06:57 EST Tuesday's Thought "Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." <BR> <BR> <BR> Thomas Edison Tue, 3 Jun 2014 06:59:23 EST