TINKY739's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=TINKY739 TINKY739's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Me and the kid http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5418006 I have been doing ok with eating. Haven't really gained, haven't really lost. Now that it is summer, I find myself naturally eating less anyway. So, now really time to commit to the fitness. My gym membership has expired, which is ok. I prefer to do different things anyway. Every time I have tried to go to the gym it doesn't really work out long term. I need to find something I can stick with long term. I have been out running a few times. I really like it, but struggle by myself. I let mysel... Thu, 11 Jul 2013 15:08:59 EST Ups and downs http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5355384 I got on the scale this morning and it was at 178.2. I was happy with that since I didn't get in as much exercise as I would've liked last week. The scale has been up and down over the last couple of months, but is slowly starting to creep down, and that makes me happy. <BR> <BR> Today I am struggling. I was thinking of going for a walk/run tonight, but have a friend that needs help with a project, so I told her I would help. I may try and get in a workout when I get home, but that depends... Mon, 13 May 2013 16:15:00 EST Woo Hoo Wednesday! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5342199 So the last week or so, things have been all over the place. Last week I did make it to the gym 3 nights. I did my class both Tuesday and Thursday. I can't say enough how great the instructor is and how encouraging she is. She just passed her personal trainer certification stuff and is thrilled about it. If I could afford it, I would definitely have her as a personal trainer. On Friday night, I did the CrossFit again with Mike. He has come so far. He has lost 71 pounds and is down to 275. He ... Wed, 1 May 2013 15:55:40 EST Not feeling well http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5328395 The ridiculous weather changes around here have been making me feel awful. Wednesday it was somewhere in the 80 degree range. It was beautiful and a friend and I went for a wonderful walk. By the time I was ready to go to the gym last night after work it was about 40 degrees outside. The same thing has happened to me the last 3 Thursdays. It is awful! The prior two Thursdays I had zero energy. It was all I could do to get through the day. So, I didn't go to the gym. I was better yesterday, so... Fri, 19 Apr 2013 07:58:35 EST Ouchie http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5326187 I went to the gym last night and did 60 minutes on the elliptical, a few minutes on the treadmill and the class, and I can feel every bit of it in my legs this morning. And, I am still super tired. I slept ok, but don't feel super rested since I worked so hard. I was proud of myself though...burned over 1200 calories, and felt good about going. <BR> <BR> Wednesday is my official weigh in day and today was 182.4. When I started exercising a few weeks ago, it was 183.2. So, I am at least movi... Wed, 17 Apr 2013 09:34:42 EST Can I go to the gym now? Please? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5325487 I haven't been to the gym since last Tuesday. Between a combination of not feeling well and other activities scheduled, I haven't been. Today is class, and I am really ready for that. But my head has been in such a strange place today, I am ready to go now. And I still have another hour of work until 5, and then class isn't until 7. I have been struggling with some strange mental things today and I need to sweat them out. <BR> <BR> I have been weighing every day for the last week or so. I kn... Tue, 16 Apr 2013 17:14:19 EST Reflections http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5322670 Today will be an interesting day. I have reconnected with a friend that I have a lot of history with. He is taking me to lunch today and who knows where else. He has known me since I was 16 or so years old. He has seen me through weight changes, style changes, my marriage and more. In the last couple of years I have become more accepting of myself and started dressing better, wearing makeup, and having more style. I promised I would put myself together today so he can see how far I have come.... Sun, 14 Apr 2013 10:29:19 EST It is the weekend! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5313440 I have to work this morning until 12, but after that it will officially be the weekend. I went out for a short walk with some friends last night. Although it wasn't a lot of exercise, it was a nice 20 minute walk and we were out in the fresh air. It felt good. I kept running all kinds of thoughts through my head this morning as I was getting ready about what I want to get done this weekend, what I need to get done this weekend, and how much I want some extra rest. Last weekend my mom and step... Sat, 6 Apr 2013 09:19:47 EST Trying to get motivated and feeling better http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5311435 I felt awful yesterday. I know it is the ever changing weather here, but it doesn't matter. It still makes me feel like yuck. Today is Thursday, which means class at the gym. I like the class a lot, and I really don't want to miss it. But, I feel like I have zero energy and I can barely focus. Not a good combo for a high intensity class. I am trying to do what I can to make myself perk up some...lots of liquids, took my allergy meds, etc. I am enjoying actually looking forward to the gym, but... Thu, 4 Apr 2013 12:28:03 EST I can actually open a box...and surviving the skinny girls http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5308798 I bought a Heart Rate Monitor awhile back and it has been sitting there staring at me for at least a few months. I actually got up and exercised this morning (gasp!) and decided I would try it with the HRM. Since it was early and I was barely functioning, I pretty much got it out of the box and figured out how to make it go. It said I burned 303 calories. After I was more awake and sat down, I figured out how to enter my information. I also brought it with me so that I can figure out how it a... Tue, 2 Apr 2013 11:28:04 EST Gains, losses, and getting R.I.P.P.E.D. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5303538 I worked my butt off at the gym on Tuesday. I was so proud. I did an hour on the elliptical. While I was working away, I began to think about losing weight and the different experiences people have. I know I am not as overweight as some people, so I do not have many physical challenges, but I also know if I don't do something about it, I could end up there some day. I am not of normal size, I am a size 16. But, my size doesn't limit me much. However, there are lots of things that do. I began ... Thu, 28 Mar 2013 17:40:09 EST Getting going http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5292234 I have been doing better about getting to the gym and exercising at home. Not where I want to be yet, but at least I am making progress. I am hoping I can find a workout buddy eventually so that I am not so terrified of the weights. I know quite a bit of exercises, but I didn't feel comfortable on my own last night. There is a weight lifting class, but I don't really want to do that either. I guess I will just have to keep at it and see what happens. <BR> <BR> I have still been trying this a... Tue, 19 Mar 2013 10:27:20 EST Way to start the week! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5283096 I struggled with sleeping last night. I couldn't fall asleep. I laid there for hours, and finally went to sleep around 2am. That does not usually make for a good day. I typically struggle a lot on days I am tired. I made some good choices yesterday that set me up for a better day today. <BR> <BR> First, I made a stir fry with lots of veggies and crab that I had for lunch and dinner. There was enough left for dinner today, so I didn't have to worry about cooking tonight. While I was chopping ... Mon, 11 Mar 2013 21:28:12 EST The Motivation!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5277426 I finally came up with a few good ideas to get the motivation back. The first is I asked a friend to do this with me. She lives a few hours away so we can't work out together, but we can definitely be there for support. Then, I came up with a plan that we both really like and I think it is really going to help me out this time. <BR> <BR> We are both putting together jars for motivation. Mine is covered in motivational sayings. It has a hole at the top to put money in. For each day that I exe... Thu, 7 Mar 2013 12:44:20 EST A good Monday http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5272781 Allergy season has come early here, so I have spent the last week or so feeling like yuck while my allergy meds really kick in. Saturday I had a headache most of the day, but yesterday was better. Today I feel a lot better. And, I have my gym bag in the car and my heart is set on working out today. <BR> <BR> However, it is the first beautiful, sunny, semi warm day we have had in awhile. So, I am really tempted to go home and then head out for a walk in the nice weather. But, I know if I go h... Mon, 4 Mar 2013 13:35:28 EST The Good, the Bad and the Frustrating http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5269527 It has been awhile since I blogged, and I have been working hard at making some changes. <BR> <BR> The Good <BR> 1. I am in counseling to deal with other problems and it is going great. <BR> 2. I have been going to the gym a couple of times a week...so at least I am making an effort <BR> 3. I have not really gained any weight, and have at least been making some effort to eat better <BR> <BR> The Bad <BR> 1.I am not making progress, so I need to start working on that. <BR> 2. I am not exerci... Sat, 2 Mar 2013 09:56:04 EST My motivation seems to have disappeared... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5024945 I have been finding myself more and more tired lately and have zero motivation to do anything. I know it is partially because I have not been taking my vitamins like I should, so my vitamin D levels are way too low. I have to make myself do that every day. I also know it is because I am bored. I am tired of not having anything to do with other people. The few friends I do have are not readily available. And, the one who is sucks and is anti-social. <BR> <BR> I am going to kickboxing tonight... Tue, 21 Aug 2012 13:07:59 EST Looking towards the future http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5004791 I have actually exercised two days in a row (walking on Sunday and elliptical at the gym yesterday) and already have plans for a kickboxing class today. As I start to work harder at losing weight, I keep in mind why I am doing it this time....why it matters...and why I have to get it done. <BR> <BR> I just signed another one year lease for my apartment. It is up on July 31, 2013. I know that I will be getting a very sizable tax refund, and I am starting now to save money to move. It is scar... Tue, 7 Aug 2012 10:14:01 EST The goal line http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4992359 When I usually log my weight, I do it on my phone. The little graphic that shows your goal line is a bit hard to see. So, I finally looked it up tonight. I restarted everything on July 9th. I set my goal to lose 80 pounds by July 31, 2013. I am right on the line, right where I should be, which is awesome to me. I have lost 4 pounds so far, and I am happy with that. I am working hard at exercising more, but not stressing myself out about it. I am eating better, but don't feel like I am "dieti... Sun, 29 Jul 2012 22:50:08 EST Blogging to stay out of the kitchen http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4886280 Today has turned into a very bad day. I have eaten enough for the day and am working hard at not letting the stress turn into eating more and more. My job involves me doing a lot of things because my boss asks them of me. I get involved with things that don't have much to do with my actual job as an accountant, but I do things to help the business run smoothly. Part of my job is every morning I stop in at both locations, pick up paperwork, take the bank deposits, and then go back to my office... Thu, 17 May 2012 20:23:23 EST My ticker moved!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4885786 I have been so lax about everything, but this week I really decided to get after it. I have been logging, for the most part, and stayed within my calorie range. I got out and went for a walk on Tuesday with a friend, and will most likely do some form of exercise tonight. I am super tired though, so we will see how that goes. And, as a reward, I got to log a weight this morning that made my ticker move down. <BR> <BR> I know I am the only one who has done this to myself. And, I know it is n... Thu, 17 May 2012 12:59:43 EST Daily Motivators http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4872218 I need to find my lost motivation. So, today I am going to start setting goals of the things that I want to accomplish each day and muster up the motivation to get some of them done. My goals will be things from work to health to house to whatever. As long as I start making some progress, maybe I can break out of the funk and get my butt moving! <BR> <BR> Today's goals: <BR> <BR> 1. Finish February financials at work and get started on March. <BR> 2. Finish organizing coupons at lunch <BR> ... Tue, 8 May 2012 12:12:05 EST I can feel the depression http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4869917 I have put on about 10 pounds in the last 6 months, and I feel like it is because my depression is coming back. I have dealt with this before (in fact about this time of year a few years ago), and it is not fun. And, it is unfortunately not treatable. I feel like a lot of times when I blog on here that it is negative, but I see this as a place for me to put my thoughts to go back and look at to help identify how to make changes. <BR> <BR> My biggest problem with depression is I have no moti... Mon, 7 May 2012 07:08:50 EST Umm...well.... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4865917 Well, I actually got up and exercised this morning. It felt really good. I worked really hard and stuck with it for the whole workout. I did one of my kickboxing DVDs and it was hard. But, I did it. <BR> <BR> And, then I went and logged it. It recorded more calories that I remember it being. And, well...umm...that would be because I have gained weight. I didn't think about the fact I have put on a few pounds since the last time I logged exercise. <BR> <BR> So, here goes towards getting mor... Fri, 4 May 2012 08:35:59 EST Starting the morning off right http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4862576 The last couple of weeks have been a big struggle. I have had no motivation to do anything, and have let a lot of things go. My house is a mess, I haven't been taking care of things I need to take care of, and I have just been highly unmotivated. I know that a lot of it has to do with me feeling so lonely. It is hard to sit here by myself every night, with practically no one to talk to. I have been sleeping on the couch most nights because after so long, I am tired of sleeping alone. I know I... Wed, 2 May 2012 08:12:16 EST Getting back at it http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4849443 I did actually log most of what I ate yesterday, and it reminded me how much I hate doing it. It makes me feel like I am on a diet and that makes me feel like I am in the wrong mindset. What I want, what I really want, is to learn to make healthy choices without feeling deprived. That I enjoy choosing fruits, vegetables, and other healthy choices. <BR> <BR> I was watching a tv show on Sunday night about two people who had gastric bypass and were now having skin surgery. I don't ever want t... Tue, 24 Apr 2012 08:28:27 EST Wanted: A New Life http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4847360 The last couple of weeks have been a roller coaster. I finished up my part time job last week. And, the last day was a long one. A "friend" that I work with told my boss at my full time job I was thinking about quitting. So, at 8:30 at night I was on the phone explaining why I am unhappy. I didn't even tell him the half of it, and I still feel nothing is going to change. <BR> <BR> I took the day off on Friday because I wasn't feeling well. And, I spent all of the day at home yesterday. Toda... Sun, 22 Apr 2012 23:47:00 EST Things just keep on changing... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4830027 I am at a point in my life that I am just at a loss. Or a crossroads, or something. I by some miracle lucked into another financial gain. My credit cards are paid off, except for a little bit. I paid off two loans that I had. I managed to pay off enough debt to lower my monthly bills by at least $1000. For the first time in a long time, I make more than enough to cover my monthly bills. The stress from my financial situation is all but gone. I still have my student loans to contend with and I... Wed, 11 Apr 2012 09:44:56 EST "The Spark" http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4767115 This is a website for weight loss and the journey that people take to better health. But, for some it is so much more than that. It is a community of people who struggle with some of the same issues, have common interests, and want to feel a sense of not being alone on their journey. There are people who check in everyday, faithfully log, and stick to it. There are people who check in often, and maybe just aren't quite there yet with their commitment. And, there are people who check in every ... Fri, 2 Mar 2012 11:59:01 EST My how time flies... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4765238 Well, life has sure changed for me. I took on a second job to have some extra income and start making a dent in my financial situation. I know that is a big part of my overall health, and by having less stress about my finances, then I can focus more on other aspects of my health. I took on working evenings and weekends doing taxes. It is two minutes from my work, so no extra stress rushing to get there, and the people I work with are nice. But, boy was I in for a surprise. I was working unti... Thu, 1 Mar 2012 12:00:03 EST It's another week, and it will be a good one! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4668732 I have been slacking in all kinds of things in life lately. But, in the last week I have gotten back at it and really paying attention to what is going on. It was just little things here and there, but I am really going to work at making changes. Today I had a Slim Fast for breakfast and a fiber bar for a snack. I have stocked up on Slim Fast and am going to get some more. I am really, really bad about not eating breakfast before I leave the house, and then lately I have made it worse by goin... Mon, 9 Jan 2012 12:45:47 EST A New Year http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4652543 I am not one to make new year's resolutions, but it is finally time to get my butt moving. For months I have been so tired that exercising was a struggle. Just living has been hard. My bad habits have gotten worse, and my good habits have not been as prominent. I was so tired that I was taking a nap every day after work. People were trying to tell me that was normal, but I knew it wasn't. I had no energy to do anything, much less focus on eating right and exercising. I went to the doctor a co... Mon, 2 Jan 2012 21:33:34 EST Good things http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4557400 Well, today started off bad. Just bad. My "sister" is in town and didn't tell me...again. I am done. I can't do this anymore, and want nothing to do with her. I grew up with her as my step-sister so I have always called her my sister. When her real (and my other step) passed away in May 2010, she made it a point to tell me I was her only sister now. I guess I see how much that really meant. Hopefully she never finds out when her husband cheats on her, and is happy. But, I am done. <BR> <BR> ... Fri, 28 Oct 2011 12:30:56 EST Positive for today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4556264 I told myself that I would try and be more positive each day, and today has gone well. My financial situation has been somewhat straightened out for now, so my stress level has gone down. It's up to me to keep it that way, and I am determined to make things better. <BR> <BR> The big positive for the day is that in about an hour, I WILL be working out at the gym. I am so sleepy...it's been raining and gloomy here all day. But, that is no excuse. They only offer this class once a week, so I a... Thu, 27 Oct 2011 17:27:55 EST Day 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4554228 Yesterday was yet another bad day, so today I am just saying screw it and starting over. I received a wonderful, wonderful gift today that makes it easy to do that. And, I am hopefully waiting on some more good news that would really help me and my stupidness out right now. No elaboration on the second good news, but the first is awesome. I got a FREEEEEEEEEE membership to a gym. It is good now until the end of the year because of an agreement that we have through my work. He is going to rene... Wed, 26 Oct 2011 12:40:11 EST How stress affects health http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4544983 As you read through all the information on SP, and read other people's stories, posts, pages, etc. you see that stress is all around us. Different people deal with it in different ways, and for many of us, it is one of the main contributing factors to our weight gain. Events happen, we eat, and we find it harder to exercise. Stress is not an excuse, it is a real issue for most people, myself definitely included. <BR> <BR> The past month has been extremely difficult for me. In fact, my stres... Thu, 20 Oct 2011 13:01:44 EST Monday, monday, monday http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4504680 Here we are, starting another work week. I decided to start the week off right with a healthy breakfast. I had oatmeal, yogurt, and a banana. And a cup of hot tea. And, I ate it BEFORE I left the house. So far that has seemed to make a difference in how I feel this morning. I am taking it nice and slow at work. Getting my stuff done, but at a leisurely pace. <BR> <BR> Last week at work was a nightmare. This weekend didn't go so great either. There were some good points, and some really bad ... Mon, 26 Sep 2011 11:38:24 EST It is a woohoo Wednesday! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4496602 Today is going awesome. And truthfully, I didn't let yesterday get me down too bad either. Yesterday at work (I am an accountant at a garage) one of the guys walked off the job. We are already a person short from our cashier quitting a few weeks ago. And, I found out Monday that the new cashier that was to be starting next week has changed his mind. So, lots to deal with. But, I kept my cool and was proud of myself. I didn't let it stress me out. <BR> <BR> I went shopping after work at JCP... Wed, 21 Sep 2011 11:35:16 EST Allergies!! Ugh!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4492909 I had such good intentions last week, but sadly, they fell by the wayside. They gave way to feeling horrible and sleeping. Sleeping, sleeping, and more sleeping. I started feeling bad on Monday and was just worn out. By Thursday, in addition to having the allergy symptoms I was already medicating, I had body aches and I was beyond tired. So, I went home Thursday and slept from 3:30-6:30, and then after dinner, went back to bed at 8:00 and slept until 7:00 the next morning. I would have though... Mon, 19 Sep 2011 13:05:27 EST Sigh http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4480406 Are there ever days where you wake up in the morning with a big sigh and just wish you could have a different life? That was me this morning. This past week has been a big rollercoaster. My vacation went really well, and things have been ok since I came back. Work has been a headache, but what's new there. But, last night a friend and I were having a good discussion about a lot of things, and it just made me think...I wish my life was different. All of the things I want in life, I don't have.... Mon, 12 Sep 2011 10:44:23 EST Today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4464093 Today I will head off on a great vacation with just me and a friend. <BR> <BR> Today I will not worry about what I look like in pictures, I will hope that I look happy. <BR> <BR> Today I will be thankful that I am not so overweight that I can't get around. I am grateful that I will be able to walk everywhere I want to go, swim in the pool, and feel good. <BR> <BR> Today I will enjoy life and not worry about my weight, and trust that I will make good decisions. <BR> <BR> Today I will head ... Sat, 3 Sep 2011 11:53:41 EST I just don't feel good! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4454335 I log in every day and poke around the site. But, does that give me the motivation to actually log what I eat? Do some exercise? Make sure I am doing what needs to be done to be healthier?? Of course not!!! <BR> <BR> I have a lot of inner struggles with myself and a lot of times, common sense seems to lose. I know what I need to do be healthier, but why don't I do it? It does take extra effort. If it didn't, everyone would be thin and healthy. I know what it takes, but I always have to ask m... Mon, 29 Aug 2011 10:49:27 EST Woo hoo Friday http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4423202 I did good at eating and logging on Wednesday. The scale said 176.0 on Thursday morning. I did good at eating and logging on Thursday. The scale said 174.2 this morning. Yay! In addition I have taken my vitamins for 3 days in a row, and drank enough water. With the heat gone (and the boss on vacation) I feel pretty good today. I don't feel completely exhausted or stressed out. I am slowly cleaning off my desk, getting my work done, yet taking it easy at the same time. <BR> <BR> As I was sit... Fri, 12 Aug 2011 15:40:14 EST The best things in life are... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4420843 One of the things that so many of us struggle with is negative self talk, bad self image, and sometimes literally feeling so overwhelmed with these things that it is the end and things will never get better. There are days I feel like that. There are days I feel like a failure because of the choices I have made, the things I have been through. But today, it's all about the positives. The good in my life...the good in me. <BR> <BR> 1. I have a good job. My job allows me a lot of freedoms, an... Thu, 11 Aug 2011 12:45:43 EST Looking to the future http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4418688 I know that I have a bright future. I know I am not defined by my past. Yet, why, if I know these things, do I still struggle every day with the things that I need to do? <BR> <BR> I have not been logging, not exercising, and honestly not paying much attention. I know that I have not been eating as poorly as I was before, as the scale this morning showed 176.6, which is still down from where I started. So, at least I am doing something right and have only really put a pound or so back on. Bu... Wed, 10 Aug 2011 12:29:37 EST Something good has happened to me!!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4405029 I have not been logging like I should, and I have not been exercising like I should. But, I have been drinking my water, eating sensibly, and slowly going back down on the scale. It's working, I feel ok, so I am not stressing. It is 107 outside here today, and I just can't bring myself to exercise. <BR> <BR> In working on my health, I have been working hard on my happiness. I have been dealing with a lot, but really, really trying to do what I can. My finances are bad. I mean, really bad. S... Wed, 3 Aug 2011 15:51:45 EST Positive and negative http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4383910 I feel like a lot of what I write about in my blog seems like complaining and negativity. Being negative is part of what I deal with in my everyday life. My health and well being are something I struggle with and have since I got my divorce. There are days that I make mistakes, and I really wonder what in the world I am here for. <BR> <BR> I have put myself in a financial situation that is difficult. It adds to my stress, which adds to my depression and takes away from my overall health. I ... Mon, 25 Jul 2011 00:11:53 EST Can I really do this? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4372457 I watched Extreme Makeover: Weightloss Edition last night. It was a good show. Just shows that we often let life get in the way of taking care of ourselves, which I know I am guilty of. At the end of the show, Chris was talking about how busy Staci was...and that if she can lose 200 lbs in one year, what is your excuse? Well, I don't have one. At all. There is no excuse that I can't get to where I need to be. Not where I want to be, where I need to be. <BR> <BR> I am single. I don't have ki... Tue, 19 Jul 2011 11:46:43 EST Random thoughts for the day http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4362271 So, I did it last night! I keep talking, and I just did it! I exercised! I did 20 minutes of aerobics on one of my Kathy Smith DVD's, and then I got out my new workout for my Wii. Um...coordination? What's that? I swear I know how to do the moves for kickboxing. But, apparently I can't coordinate jabs and crosses with pushing the button when the box is in the square and I am actually punching. I will keep at it though, and it kept me moving for another 10 minutes so I actually worked out for... Thu, 14 Jul 2011 11:36:41 EST Important questions http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4360085 As I was getting ready for work this morning, I was thinking about how many questions you have to ask yourself when trying to do something as big as changing your health permanently. As I started to think about those questions, boy do I have some crappy answers!! It is a big effort to change the answers to the questions, so the biggest one is are you ready?? And, I know I am but here's what I have so far. <BR> <BR> 1. Why don't you exercise when you get home from work at night? Well...I am l... Wed, 13 Jul 2011 11:32:28 EST