SUNSETWATCHER's SparkPeople Blog SUNSETWATCHER's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Excuses are an Obstacle! Yesterday, I simply did not have enough time at work to fit in my nutrition - too much to do in just 3 hours in the morning before going into a 4 hour meeting for the afternoon at our Head Office. After the meeting I went grocery shopping which took a couple of hours as I wanted to make sure I got only fresh foods. It took longer in the fruit and vegetable section because I bought some produce I've never had before, so the decision and choice was not as quick as it is for other vegetables a... Fri, 18 Jan 2013 06:41:41 EST Keep moving forward I have spent countless times starting over with my weightloss without completion and have come to the realization that it becomes somewhat of a defeated battle if I am continually “starting over” all the time, yet never reaching my goal. <BR> <BR> Instead, I now look at the weight I have to lose as not something I need to start over with, but to keep going with where I left off. I never stopped trying to lose weight when faced with obstacles. I never stopped trying even if I was met wit... Mon, 14 Jan 2013 19:07:45 EST No two loaves of Rye bread... I spent most of my night (and into the morning hours) putting together a Nutritional Library of all the foods I eat and their nutritional values. Now I know Sparkpeople has the feature in the foods we track, but I often find that when searching for a particular item, I can’t find it. And I love the feature where I can record my own nutritional values for the foods I eat. This gave me the idea that perhaps I should have my own Nutritional Library, separate of Sparkpeople. Afterall, I’m not... Wed, 9 Jan 2013 10:26:42 EST Tough words to write Tough words to write are when I compare what I learned about myself during the months of fighting breast cancer and the weight I have countless times failed to lose but know I am capable of losing. <BR> <BR> Tough words to write are when I acknowledge the courage, the tenacity and the empowerment I felt during my battle with breast cancer when all along I have the courage and tenacity to lose weight and can feel empowered by the results. <BR> <BR> Tough words to write when I compare cancer ... Tue, 8 Jan 2013 17:32:47 EST What is the fear?? I've been down this road before. I get just a few pounds away from breaking past the 200 mark and something scares me off. All my efforts of whatever weight I had lost up to that moment, gets tossed out the window when I begin the sabotage of putting the weight back on. I never get to see if I can do it, if I can lose those few pounds and break free from the 200's. <BR> <BR> I don't know what it is that scares me. I can't imagine that it's the fear of feeling good because that's what I... Fri, 15 Jan 2010 18:59:16 EST Day 7 - Weigh-in WOO HOO! This low-carb lifestyle paid off. I lost 8 pounds this week. The most I've ever lost in a single week in any diet I have ever tried. <BR> <BR> <em>416</em> Fri, 23 Oct 2009 22:28:55 EST Day 5 - Pounds are dropping <em>192</em> <em>55</em> <BR> <BR> Since starting my diet 5 days ago, I've dropped 7 pounds. That's unheard of in my lifetime of trying diets, but this low-carb diet is doing the trick that no other diet was able to do. I feel like I'm on the Biggest Loser show because that's what some contestants would lose in a short period of time. I'm curious now...what will the weightloss be by the 7th day? <BR> <BR> I did a HUGE walk today. Not something I planned, but once I got out, I kept sa... Wed, 21 Oct 2009 20:06:05 EST Day 2 - Liking my new diet <em>274</em> <em>140</em> <em>490</em> <em>69</em> <BR> <BR> It's a low-carb diet which is something I have never considered to try because I thought I would miss my carbs too much. Funny enough though, I don't, and what's even more amazing is that I haven't had any problems with my acid reflux which is something I've suffered from for years, daily, so not having any of those symptoms is nothing short of a miracle for me. <BR> <BR> This diet is not just something I found in a book, or... Sun, 18 Oct 2009 23:47:45 EST Back to day 1 and starting over? <em>24</em> Not to start off my first day back with a sob story, but after having taken ill for two months, not knowing why or what the cause was, I thought I'd question if I am really back and really starting over or will this just be another attempt at nothing at all. I guess time will tell. Mon, 22 Jun 2009 11:54:45 EST Trying something different (even if it feels like I'm the only one) It's not me in the picture, but it could be, because the "something different" that I'm doing is what the woman in the picture is doing - Nordic Walking. I'd heard about this form of exercise a year ago and knew this was what I was meant to do, but for the life of me, couldn't find where to buy the poles. I also couldn't find a local fitness club or group that did Nordic Walking. It wasn't until I joined a running clinic last May that I had heard they were thinking about starting up a Nord... Wed, 27 Aug 2008 13:48:38 EST Fallen Spark <em>15</em> This is what I feel like and I'm struggling badly to get back on track. I can't seem to find the motivation I had months ago. Just writing this is a struggle. <BR> <BR> <em>39</em> I just don't know how or what I need to do to feel happy about myself. I'm definitely not happy about my weight gain, yet doing something about it has to come from somewhere and I know it can only come from me. <BR> <BR> <em>287</em> <em>262</em> I've been eating and drinking all the wrong ... Tue, 29 Jul 2008 13:52:50 EST I am... <em>185</em> I am a winner! I am beautiful and I treat myself with respect and love. I am encouraged to keep moving forward even if at times I can't bare to open the door to see what waits for me outside. I am creative and the beauty of my home is a reflection of my creativity. I am loving and supportive of my brothers and sisters and of their dreams and goals. I am abundantly rich; not all richness has value in money, therefore, my richness is what I give to others, not what I expect ... Mon, 26 May 2008 10:53:51 EST I did my first run today And I actually found it to be quite an empowering experience because of how it made me feel during and after the run. My running clinic doesn't start until May 26 and to help me prepare for it it was suggested I start with short runs during my power walks. That's what I've learned in talking to people about being a beginner runner and it is also what I will be learning in my running clinic as well and since I don't want to just wait until then to start running, I thought I would see what it... Thu, 17 Apr 2008 15:38:34 EST Stepping outside My program has been pretty much, off and on, the same thing. I keep falling off the wagon and crawling back on reluctantly, I might add as it does get harder and harder each time I fall off to get back on again. Something has to change. I have to change. <BR> <BR> For a year I've talked about being interested in taking up running and for a year I've done nothing about it. How does one go about being a non-runner into a runner? How does it start? Sure, I have the interest, but do I just... Sun, 6 Apr 2008 18:14:37 EST Day 369 - Happy Anniversary?? It's official. I've been on spark now for a year. I lost some weight, gained some back, lost again, and gained some back again. Now I feel like I'm starting from scratch again with my weight. Oh well. I guess the good news is that even though the weight is still an ongoing journey, I gained some really good healthy habits along the way like drinking water every day, getting proper sleep at nights, and getting more exercise. My sedentary, night-owl, snacking-at-night lifestyle is no more... Wed, 26 Mar 2008 15:45:49 EST Day 349 - Finding balance I’ve hit rock-bottom emotionally way too many times in my lifetime to want to hit it again, yet at times struggle with consistency in my health (physically, mentally and spiritually) to prevent it from happening again. Although my health is so much better this year then previous years, I still have such a long way to go before I have a balanced, consistent healthy life. I still have a lot of changing to do and still struggle with the concept of changing some of those areas of my life. Ofte... Fri, 7 Mar 2008 14:16:16 EST Day 340 - Fear of Success I continually sabotage myself everytime I embark on a new endeavour, idea or goal. I quit just as it starts to feel really real and looking back at my life, right back to my childhood, I’ve always been like this. I fear being successful and as long as I have this fear I can’t possibly move forward. Fearing success stops me from losing weight, and more then .5 a week, saving money, being out of debt, being in healthy relationships, or being successful at my endeavours and goals. <BR> <BR> ... Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:45:58 EST Day 334 - Self-loathing I don't know about you, but I am very guilty when it comes to self-loathing. So many mistakes I've made in the past are a constant reminder of all my failings and I would berate myself for not being stronger. So often I would look in the mirror and see this grossly obese woman looking back at me asking why I didn't stop the abuse of overeating that caused me to look so unkempt and unfit. So often I would be reminded by my wardrobe that fashion was obviously not my priority; I would hide in... Thu, 21 Feb 2008 12:44:55 EST Day 332 - Changing from "I can" to "I am" Every time I ever tried a diet or lifestyle change I would go through the motions of turning a new leaf over in my life and repeatedly while going through these motions I would say to myself "I can do this!". <BR> <BR> What was always so apparent to me was that although some changes were happening, I wasn't always so sure I was honestly ready for the changes yet I would continue to say to myself, "I can do this!". <BR> <BR> I knew there was a lot of emotional crap that hadn't been dealt wit... Tue, 19 Feb 2008 16:02:45 EST Day 326 - Where to put those doubts I would say that it was probably about two weeks ago when I started to put more effort into my weightloss. My weight is still at 216 which means I am maintaining what I’ve lost so far and I am singing the 199 song because I really want to be below 200. I no longer wish to fear reaching the goal of under 200. I am choosing to weigh less just as Chris chose to help the cause of fighting cancer by pledging herself in The Ride To Conquer Cancer which is a two day event to bike to Niagara Falls... Wed, 13 Feb 2008 11:31:02 EST Day 325 - Writing about it is everything!! My life is a journey and every day brings something new and different. No two days are the same, just as no two thoughts are the same. <BR> <BR> I keep several journals going at the same time and writing/journaling has always been a HUGE thing for me, ever since I was young. It is my way of sharing exactly what is going on in my head. You might think I was totally out of my mind, out of sync with reality if you read one entry on a particular day and a different entry from one of my othe... Tue, 12 Feb 2008 10:26:32 EST Day 322 - Asserting myself "Day by day our self-image is changing for the better. We're beginning to really like ourselves and to have a sense of importance as individuals. The more progress we make along these lines, the easier it becomes to recognize our physical, emotional, and spiritual needs and to assert ourselves accordingly. <BR> <BR> In the past, the hour we set aside for exercise or meditation was the first thing to be cancelled if someone needed something done. Today we take the time that's necessary for... Sat, 9 Feb 2008 12:47:10 EST Day 310 - Letting go "Letting go of the past and moving on is a tall order, it requires a kind of releasing that I still find difficult to do. My past will always be in the shadows of my memory to haunt me if I do not recognize it as a part of me. If I pretend it's not important, grit my teeth and force myself to numb the pain, I have missed the point of recovery. On the other hand, if I am unwilling to let go no matter how many times I have working through certain issues, I am also not allowing myself to be f... Mon, 28 Jan 2008 06:16:53 EST Day 297 - what's working, what's not It occurred to me yesterday that since July 2007 I had developed the habit of tracking my progress with my Habit Forming Charts and when I stopped doing them over my holidays and into the new year I was basically stopping a habit that became second nature to me. <BR> <BR> Yesterday, I talked in circles not knowing where or in what direction I was heading and today I feel focused and on track. <BR> <BR> My mother said to me during my holidays that sometimes we don’t have the luxury of always... Tue, 15 Jan 2008 12:42:32 EST Day 296 - what is it I'm really looking for? I've spent the last couple of hours reading member's sparkblogs, and my own; reading member's sparkpages and searching for a new team to join and wondering what is it I'm really looking for? Although I like being accountable for my actions, I don't have much to show for it. I've been with sparkpeople since March 2007, lost 15 pounds and gained back 12. I'm dead set at not gaining anymore, but what is it I'm really looking for? Will not being heavy really give me a better life? Will it gi... Mon, 14 Jan 2008 23:10:15 EST Day 295 - weekend ramblins' My live demo went really well. Better then expected and I got a good turnout. I'm fairly certain that there is now less confusion as to how or where to start on sparkpeople and what this website is really about. It was suggested at the demo that our company could have a goal that we could all strive for by a certain date and if met, the company would make a donation to our favourite charity. Now, if that isn't an incentive to work towards a goal, I don't know what is. <BR> <BR> It was ou... Sun, 13 Jan 2008 23:11:23 EST Day 292 - Live Demo What better way to spread the spark then to give a live demo to your company about sparkpeople. Well, that's what I'm going to do tomorrow and I must admit, it's a little nerve-wracking considering I've never done a live demo before. I thought it would be the best way for them to get to know sparkpeople better and because of their expressed interest in the Sparkpeople Employee Wellness Program. I know at first though that they felt somewhat lost as to where to start. I thought I was givi... Thu, 10 Jan 2008 19:44:26 EST Day 289 - Back on track I went away on some much needed holidays and feel much better. I have a new outlook on life. Sometimes I need to just take a break from life to understand it. My holidays helped me in that respect. <BR> <BR> So, 19 days later I find my weight did absolutely nothing. I'm still 218 and although I didn't lose any weight (I was so sure I would gain) I managed to maintain my weight throughout my entire holiday which is somewhat of a HUGE relief and a bit of a miracle considering there were so... Mon, 7 Jan 2008 22:11:18 EST Day 265 - Still trying I'm still here. I'm trying to do right by eating right. I'm trying to get a minimum of 30min of exercise in every day. I'm still working on my habit forming charts (on Chart 8 now). I'm still working towards changing my old ways into healthier ways. I'm still trying. Fri, 14 Dec 2007 21:25:51 EST Day 235 - I'm getting signals Do you ever get that feeling like you've been somewhere before or you've seen that face, or recognize a name, or recall a sound or smell but you can't quite put your finger on where that feeling, sight, recognition, smell, sound comes from. It's just there, like a signal from the past, nudging you, reminding you that you've been here before, you've heard this before, you recognize these signs only this time you're a stronger person, more emotionally stable, more self-assured, and proud of wh... Wed, 14 Nov 2007 14:44:15 EST Day 216 - Something miraculous I'm now in my 6th Habit Forming Chart and something miraculous is starting to happen. It's as if, up to this point, I'm starting to really connect to the reason why I started this adventure in the first place. I've had more HITS in this chart then in my previous charts and in this week alone...I've had 4 days of all hits. It has been a very red week for me, which means bullseye all the way. I'm very pleased with my progress. Fri, 26 Oct 2007 18:15:36 EST Day 198 - A scary place I had a goal to lose a certain amount of weight by my brother's wedding and I didn't make it. I did manage to lose some weight though so it wasn't a complete loss. I think setting myself up to lose weight by a certain time frame wasn't the best advice I've given myself and so my next goal isn't so much that I lose weight by a certain date, but that I just get to a certain weight without having a date tied to it. <BR> <BR> I would like to see myself below the 200 mark. It's actually a scar... Mon, 8 Oct 2007 15:42:45 EST Day 184 - Won't Fit Over the Labour Day Weekend, I got a chance to spend some quality time with my neice and one afternoon she asked about having a story read to her but only if we could cuddle. So I said, "let's cuddle and read your story on the couch" and she replied, "YOU'RE TOO FAT! YOU WON'T FIT!" <BR> <BR> She's only 4 years old. It was quite a slap in the face to get a comment like that out of a child. In all honesty, I was so taken-aback by her comment, I didn't know how to respond. Her father said... Wed, 26 Sep 2007 16:33:34 EST Day 183 - Fickle The word today is fickle... <BR> <BR> A friend once referred to me as "fickle" because I can never stay consistent in my choices. He said it in a derogatory way as if I should have been offended. But instead, I said, "thank you" because although I may appear fickle to him, or others for that matter, thank god I have the right mind to change my mind whenever I want. As a matter of fact, being fickle is not a liability, but actually an asset especially to a creative Gemini, such as myself. ... Tue, 25 Sep 2007 22:29:34 EST Day 178 - What is so wrong with being a Fruitarian? Eating fruit and raw nuts seems to give people the impression that I'm eating unhealthy because I'm not following the "food guide" and including vegetables, dairy and grains in my intake. <BR> <BR> I would like to point out that when I drink my naturally squeezed lemon juice every morning I am detoxing my body. When I have cantaloupe and honeydew melon in the morning I am alert and my energy is really strong as though I drank coffee all morning. When I have my raw nuts for my mid-morning s... Thu, 20 Sep 2007 23:27:59 EST Day 177 - Starting over again or moving forward Ok...yes...I've definitely gone back to my original 5 habits...and yes...I did eliminate one component from my third habit...but...wait a third habit originally had 2 components in it from the very beginning so technically I shouldn't make it an only one component habit...sooooo...habit 3 is back to two components...with a slight variation to it... <BR> <BR> 1. Up no later than 7am <BR> 2. 8+ hours of sleep <BR> 3. Stretching and/or Strengthening (it used to be Stretch & Strength... Wed, 19 Sep 2007 17:59:07 EST Day 175 - Going back to my original 5 It doesn't make sense for me to keep adding onto my habit forming chart and it doesn't make sense to work on a habit that has two components to it. So...I'm going back to my original 5 habits that I've been working on since the beginning when I started using these charts to make changes in my life. Habit 3 will now consist of only one component which is "stretching". If I can find consistency in my stretching, I know it will eventually lead me into body strengthening as they both coexist w... Mon, 17 Sep 2007 10:00:03 EST Day 165 - Progress I started my Habit Forming ways July 5 and I'm into my fourth chart now. I have my off days which you can see by the blue squares and my better days which you can tell by my red squares. My third chart looks like I did the best so far in that there are more red squares then there are of blue squares. I can tell you this though that I am getting better at getting my sleep which was probably my main concern and is what started me on this crusade to begin with. <BR> <BR> I went away to the c... Fri, 7 Sep 2007 13:58:50 EST Day 155 - No time For 7 days now my weight has fluctuated between 209 and 208. Seeing 208 was so exciting I couldn't contain my exhileration and screamed in joy. I so look forward to the day when the scale gets stuck at 208 so that I can maintain it until my next drop in weight. <BR> <BR> My habit forming chart is progressing quite well. I'm in my third chart of 21 days and still working on my original 5 habits, but for my third chart of 21 days, I added cardio into the mix: <BR> <BR> 1. up no later than... Tue, 28 Aug 2007 10:04:12 EST Day 148 - What I want, I got!! I wanted to see 209 on the scales and felt pretty certain with the steps I was taking that I would see 209 really soon. I was right because no sooner had I said that I've not seen 213 in my morning weigh-ins. For five days now the scale has read 209 which means not only did I meet my 209 goal, but I've been able to maintain my new weight for 5 days which is AWESOME! I am so proud of this great achievement and the more proactive I am with my health the more I see positive, healthy changes h... Tue, 21 Aug 2007 15:11:44 EST Day 141 - What I want I weighed in this morning at 211.5 and I will NEVER see 213 again in my morning weigh-ins. I am now working towards a 209 result and have no doubt I will see it soon as long as I stick to my raw-food, fruitarian lifestyle. By the end of August I want my weight to be at 205 or less. By the end of September I want to be in the mid to low 190’s and by the end of October I’m going to be in my 180’s, no matter what! November I will see the 170’s, probably at the high end of the scale and by th... Tue, 14 Aug 2007 15:28:11 EST Day 136 - deep within me One day I'm up; one day I'm down; one day I'm up; next day I'm down; talk about a yo-yo life. I think it's almost worse then being on a yo-yo diet!! <BR> <BR> I hate being in the state of mind where life is just blah; where the feelings and emotions are just floating in limbo with no roots grounding them to a specific time or event. It's like being in a vast void of space where nothing exists. <BR> <BR> Ralph Waldo Emerson said: “Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you... Thu, 9 Aug 2007 13:01:02 EST Day 135 - What's Up?? I've gained 3 lbs. I haven't tracked my nutrition or exercise in weeks. Some days I'm all gung ho, while other days I couldn't care less what I do. I've got to change the way I'm thinking about stuff, because it's destroying me spiritually. If my spirit gets diminished, it wrecks havoc on me emotionally, and if I suffer emotionally, my physical self will suffer because the motivation to exercise and take better care of my health won't be there. <BR> <BR> By the way...I caved in over the ... Wed, 8 Aug 2007 23:20:48 EST Day 130 - What to have for dinner? It's my first weekend in about a year, since my daughter came back from college, that I'm spending it alone. She went to the cottage for the long weekend and I stayed in the city. So…as I'm sitting in my livingroom, watching a movie, I started to think about dinner. "Seeing that it's my first weekend alone" I thought "maybe I could treat myself to a take-out dinner? I haven't had take-out since before joining Spark" and thought "I'm entitled to a treat." So…as I was watching my movie, I ... Fri, 3 Aug 2007 20:53:37 EST Day 129 - Pa's Birthday Pa’s 78th birthday was a smash! He had so much fun and I think having a few of his work and tennis friends and the rest of the family (who could be there) made a huge difference in how the evening went. Geoff and David Francey called from Vancouver with a song which was sung in Accopalla(?) style and I just happened to be downstairs when they called so I got a chance to hear it. It was great! Doug loves telling jokes and laughs at all his jokes even if nobody else does. Doug and Howard ... Thu, 2 Aug 2007 16:14:50 EST Day 125 - Healing It's almost insulting to get sick when I've been working so hard at living a healthier lifestyle, but the breakdown I recently have gone through with my health is a reminder that even during healthy times, I need to also take care of my mental and spiritual state and not just the physical elements of obtaining good health. <BR> <BR> I feel as though I am going through another transistion in my life like the changing of a season. It's a strange sensation to go through and I'm not really sure... Sun, 29 Jul 2007 15:08:17 EST Day 120 - where's my gumption?? It's been over a week now since my last entry and I just haven't felt motivated to write anything. As a matter of fact I've just been feeling out of sorts, in all aspects of my life, and I'm finding it difficult getting my gumption back. <BR> <BR> I miss my "sparkle". <BR> <BR> I've been eating more starchy foods this past week, then I have since being on SP. I've slacked off on my cardio, my strength training and even my walking. <BR> <BR> When I weighed in last Friday, the scale read... Tue, 24 Jul 2007 14:36:59 EST Day 109 - Changing of the Guard Keeping up with my health on a daily basis brings me enthusiasm, optimism and excitement because it’s like being in a new job that I absolutely love being a part of. Everything I do, I do because of the benefits I gain from giving myself healthier choices. Who knew that this is how it would be? I hear and read about success stories all the time, but unless I’m living in the NOW, it’s hard to relate to those successes. Sure, hands down, they are, without a doubt, inspirational stories, and... Fri, 13 Jul 2007 13:10:03 EST Day 107 - One step forward, 10 steps back That's what it felt like today, and no fault of mine. But there are some people in this world who bully you into thinking that you're not good enough to be the best. You could have all the positive teachings in the world; all the best teachers at your fingertips; all the right tools to get you where you are at today; and, a vast community of friends, and then someone comes along and literally pulls the rug right out from under you and expects you to be okay with it. <BR> <BR> I'm not okay ... Wed, 11 Jul 2007 22:20:15 EST Day 106 - Singing the 209 Song I'm really liking this new feature on SPARK because now when I say I'm singing the 209 song (it was the 213 song) you can see I'm really going all out to make this happen. I open up my Cakewalk program; I turn on my MIDI keyboard; I'm humming a tune, and before you know it...PRESTO...a song is born. <BR> <BR> This is my 209 song! Tue, 10 Jul 2007 22:45:32 EST