STEPH-KNEE's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=STEPH%2DKNEE STEPH-KNEE's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Dland Part 2: Revenge Of The Mouse + Game Has Begun! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5784464 Okay, so I totally went to Disneyland again, but this time with a friend/coworker! I had a blast with my uncle, but boys aren't as "picturey" as girls are! LOL. We like to take pics, and go do little silly stuff that maybe a guy wouldn't be interested in doing. We had a blast and are headed back the first week of October, the second week of October I'm headed back with my uncle... but this coming Saturday I'm headed to Universal Studios Hollywood Horror Nights! So excited! The thing with that... Mon, 22 Sep 2014 03:54:59 EST Who Wants To Play A Game? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5782057 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/2/l1261308457.jpg"> <BR> Okay, so not a scary game, but a fun game! Okay, maybe fun is over advertising a little bit! <em>246</em> I was trying to come up for a way that my coworker and I could get back to business and kind of feeling like we are working on our weight loss together. As everyone knows, our Disneyland goal kind of went in the toilet, but we are going to Disneyland on Friday anyways. <em>246</em> We are ready to have some fu... Thu, 18 Sep 2014 03:00:59 EST So Here's The Problem... LOL! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5780793 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/7/l1728648979.jpg"> <BR> This is totally one of this ridiculous "non problem problems"! <em>246</em> I have been thinking a lot about everything. How I am still up 8ish pounds from my lowest weight... That I am still almost 30 pounds away from my goal weight and I was trying to really figure some things out. Before I think I was scared of the success... I think I'm to a point now where I'm not really scared and I'm definitely not self sabota... Tue, 16 Sep 2014 07:31:15 EST Opinions Are Like ________... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5778320 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/7/l1764344721.jpg"> <BR> <BR> So every quote about opinions ended in something quite inappropriate... so I will just let you fill in the blank the word of your choice! <em>211</em> <BR> <BR> I am often open to hearing other people's ideas and opinions... a lot of the time I learn something new or different! I don't always agree with them, but I typically don't mind listening to what others have to say. I also do my best to remember that i... Fri, 12 Sep 2014 03:01:46 EST Is The Glass 1/2 Empty Or 1/2 Full? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5775558 September 2014: 190ISH <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/0/l1017842740.jpg"> <BR> <BR> July 2013: <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/4/l1454752672.jpg"> <BR> ^It may be only a few pounds difference, but I definitely see big changes in my face comparing those 2 photos! <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/9/l198252379.jpg"> <BR> I have to say, I can be very fickle, with just about everything! I change my mind, my plan, my goals, everyth... Mon, 8 Sep 2014 03:04:16 EST Disneyland, The Zoo & 25,000 Step Badge, OH MY! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5773736 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/4/l1429700257.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Wednesday was just an all around amazing day! <em>334</em> I could go on and on for hours about how Disneyland wasn't really crowded, we rode about 15 rides and our longest wait was a mere 30 minutes! We met lots of characters and we walked an amazing 9 miles! So the fun part isn't Spark related, but let me repeat, we walked 9 miles! Not only did we walk 9 miles, I came home and walked Sparky 1 1/2. Then I paced... Fri, 5 Sep 2014 05:03:30 EST Sometimes You Just Gotta Do It Yourself... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5772340 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/3/l1360348068.jpg"> <BR> <BR> <BR> Weight loss journeys are not easy, we need all the support and accountability we can get! In an ideal world, everyone in your household would hop on board, eat the same foods you do, and walk hand in hand with you as you embark on this healthy journey! Some are lucky enough to have that support, but that isn't the case for everyone. I have always admired anyone who can lose this weight in a household where h... Wed, 3 Sep 2014 03:01:09 EST Quiet Time Is Over & No Weigh September! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5769740 It was a mere 2 days ago that I said I needed to take some "quiet time" for myself to kind of figure out what was going on with me. Well, quiet time is over! <em>246</em> So seriously, I really can't stay away from Spark. It just goes to show how much this is a part of my life, my weight loss journey and my everyday routine. I think I was just feeling really overwhelmed, but luckily that feeling has passed! I'm not back on track, but I am ready to be! That might sound silly, but I guess th... Sat, 30 Aug 2014 05:15:04 EST Day 4: SPLAT! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5767124 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/6/0/l600371912.jpg"> <BR> <BR> In my last blog I talked about how the ball was rolling in the right direction... but I was like Indiana Jones, trying to stay ahead of it, hoping not to get squished! I wish I could tell you that some unforeseeable circumstance came in, tripped me up through no fault of my own, and that is what caused me to fall down and get squashed by the giant boulder. <em>246</em> But one thing that is pretty cool about me ... Tue, 26 Aug 2014 06:35:38 EST The Ball Is Rolling In The Right Direction... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5765817 But I'm trying to make sure the ball won't crush me! <em>246</em> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/9/l1919435658.jpg"> <BR> <BR> <em>145</em> I don't like to count my chickens before they're hatched, so I'm trying to be extra careful here! <em>20</em> It's not that I really believe I am actually going to jinx it... I just know that sometimes when things are going well, something unexpected can pop up and throw me off my game! <BR> <BR> But Friday I completed ... Sun, 24 Aug 2014 03:10:39 EST A Backslider VS. A Quitter... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5764659 So it's no secret I have been having a rough time, I am oh so very vocal about it! <em>211</em> I have been working on "shaking it off" and moving forward... and I am definitely taking baby steps in the right direction. My 2 most important things that I am working on are getting back on track with my weight loss journey and getting my house organized. Those are two pretty big tasks, especially when you feel overwhelmed. There's so much to do it's one of those things where it's like "where ... Fri, 22 Aug 2014 03:17:05 EST Time To "Shake It Off"! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5763303 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/4/l241595097.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Do you ever hear a song at the perfect moment and go "that is what I needed today?" Well Taylor Swift's new video for Shake It Off gave me such a laugh that I needed! You can love her or hate her, I actually really don't care, but I do like a few of her songs. But seeing her dance around without a care in the world gave me a laugh that I so desperately needed. It also gave me a renewed attitude. I don't need to wor... Wed, 20 Aug 2014 03:01:41 EST STEPH-KNEE Uncensored: Volume 2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5761859 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/0/l2059334275.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I did a blog like this back in July. The difference between a blog like this and my "regular blogs" is that I am uncensored... I am always honest on Spark with ALL of my blogs... but I am also very aware that I am writing a BLOG for lots of people to see. So I might leave out certain things that might come off wrong or that are too personal. So when I do these uncensored things, I just share EVERYTHING. These blog... Mon, 18 Aug 2014 04:35:55 EST Case Of The Blahs, Clean Slate & A ? For All Of You... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5760661 <em>228</em> Based on past experiences posting "negative/blah" things, I have to start with a disclaimer LOL! I know everyone here does their best to help and be supportive, but sometimes we can get the wrong impression from a post. So I just wanted to say that I am generally a very happy person... right now I am feeling blah and this post will reflect that, but it is not how I feel on a day to day basis. Why the disclaimer? Because the last thing I need to hear when I am having a blah day ... Sat, 16 Aug 2014 03:01:48 EST Disappointment & A Lesson From Sparky! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5759369 So I can't lie... there is a part of me that never wanted to mention the whole Vegas trip again. To just come back and move forward, start fresh and not look back. But I think part of what works for me is venting through blogging... it really gives me a sense of accountability and it helps me to take steps in the right direction again. <BR> <BR> I really wanted to come back with a sparkling report of how I did in Vegas, but I can't do that. Even my recent status update said I did 5/7 good da... Thu, 14 Aug 2014 05:18:23 EST Disneyland Goal, Rubber Band Ball & New Hobby http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5752620 <em>304</em> First of all, thank you so much for all the kind comments I have gotten on my last few blogs! I only blog when I want to share something with all of you, and I have clearly had a lot to share this past week. I am just thankful you all aren't sick of me yet! <em>246</em> <em>211</em> <BR> <BR> I will be the first to say that even though I know *I* am the one responsible for my weight loss, as I am the one doing the work... I truly believe that I wouldn't have been able t... Mon, 4 Aug 2014 03:17:36 EST Binge Monster On The Loose! BEWARE! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5751481 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/4/9/l499361101.jpg"> <BR> I am coming to you LIVE, just moments after I had a surprise attack from the Binge Monster! <em>333</em> I will say it was a battle, and he was winning, boy was he winning! But I managed to stop myself mid attack. That is not usually something I can do! Here's the scoop... <BR> <BR> Today was a pretty stressful day. I will spare you all the details but I really really felt the need to stress eat. Not only that, but be... Sat, 2 Aug 2014 05:01:19 EST Successful People Do It Too! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5750800 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/6/l565938761.jpg"> <BR> We all know the healthy habits that successful Sparkers do to lose this weight and keep it off! Although each person is different, we know that they all most likely have the following things in common: <BR> <BR> <em>301</em> Watch their food intake (whether it's tracking, counting carbs, portion control, etc). <BR> <em>363</em> They exercise or stay active. <BR> <em>91</em> The drink their water. <BR> <em>7</em>... Fri, 1 Aug 2014 03:00:36 EST FINALLY 90 Pounds Down! Time To Party! :D http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5749365 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/1/l1163659821.jpg"> <BR> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <BR> This milestone has been a long time coming! Before I kick up my heels and celebrate this awesome accomplishment, I want to be serious for a moment. <em>20</em> I hit 80 pounds down September 4, 2013 and if you told me on that day that I would be claiming my 90 pounds down ... Wed, 30 Jul 2014 03:05:11 EST The Days Are Flying By! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5746736 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/7/l1758533393.jpg"> <BR> I noticed that when I'm on track and doing well the days just sort of fly by! I am happy, content, feeling good and they just come and go. When I am off track, doing poorly and gaining weight, it seems like the days go by and just sort of "slip away". That is definitely not a fun feeling! So I'm glad that I'm on the upswing right now. <em>104</em> Whenever I first get back on track, I find it motivating to count the g... Sat, 26 Jul 2014 03:18:33 EST So Close, Yet So Far Away! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5745400 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/9/l596077000.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Since starting my "new plan" that I mentioned in my last blog, I have been weighing daily. I know I have talked many times about needing to break my daily weighing habit, because it typically makes me crazy! I let the scale affect my mood and sometimes even affect my progress (or lack thereof) for the entire day. But when I started this plan, I really wanted to document daily weigh ins. I wanted to see the daily fl... Thu, 24 Jul 2014 03:07:16 EST "What's Your New Plan?" http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5743127 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/2/l1286488999.jpg"> <BR> So I didn't mean to be a tease on my last blog, I promise I didn't! <em>211</em> It was never meant to be a secret. <em>246</em> I had a few inquiries about what that new plan might be... especially after I lost about 5 pounds the first week. (I lost 5 pounds in my "spark week" from Wed-Wed but 7 pounds in the first 9 days on the plan). The thing of it is, I know this was mostly water weight. When we start a new p... Mon, 21 Jul 2014 03:02:03 EST 5lbs Down & Lots Of Milestones On The Horizon... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5740271 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/7/l1731208467.jpg"> <BR> I lost 5 pounds this week! <em>104</em> <em>244</em> I know I am kind of obnoxious about that, but that really never happens anymore, so it is exciting news. <em>20</em> I do know the reason behind it, it's because I've started a new eating plan... I am not quite ready to spill the details, but it is an experiment in the making. If I do it long enough to form an opinion and have results from it, then I will sh... Wed, 16 Jul 2014 17:54:57 EST The Puppies & Rainbows Are Back & Better Than Ever! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5737654 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/6/5/l655717061.jpg"> <BR> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <em>338</em> <em>437</em> <BR> <BR> I have been on this journey for close to 28 months (yes I count <em>246</em> ), and I often get distracted... it doesn't take much to distract me either! The scale can stall, I get distracted, get lazy, gain a few pounds. Or the scale even drops to an all new low numbe... Sun, 13 Jul 2014 03:04:17 EST Never Before Seen "Before" Pics! ;) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5735762 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/9/l1921708682.jpg"> <BR> <link>oi60.tinypic.com/9sqnbn.jpg </link> <BR> I let my weight hold me back from having my picture taken... not only that, but the few that were taken never really saw the light of day, because I looked fat and didn't need anyone to see that. I realize how silly that is now, if they knew me, they knew I was fat, they knew what I looked like, so there was no reason to hide it. But if you check my Facebook, all the pic... Thu, 10 Jul 2014 03:12:50 EST Perfectly Timed Perspective... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5733495 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/2/l1245809193.jpg"> <BR> I have been struggling for quite a few days now... I am not panicking yet... but it is getting close to that <em>230</em> zone. So what happened today could not have come at a better time. But to paint a better picture... let me give you a little extra insight into today... <BR> <BR> I am feeling bloated, crummy, TOM is coming any second, I feel like a fatty-mc-failure... made terrible food choices, and just feel al... Mon, 7 Jul 2014 03:01:54 EST STEPH-KNEE Uncensored... Volume 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5731744 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/4/l548932170.jpg"> <BR> <BR> So I am always very honest here on Spark...when I'm doing great my blogs are all about positivity and <em>338</em> 's and <em>437</em> 's.... and when I am in the pit of despair, they are doom and gloom, but usually with some positivity sprinkled in at the end to try and help me to get out of the pit. I've always been honest and I always will be... but I will say that when I blog, I am very aware that at least ... Fri, 4 Jul 2014 06:47:16 EST Ready For More And Realizing I'm Lucky... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5729573 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/0/l2057151747.jpg"> <BR> <BR> <em>137</em> I'm feeling quite lucky today, and am realizing I have so much to be thankful for. When I started this journey 27 months ago (yes, I count <em>246</em> ) EVERY aspect took a great amount of time, energy and planning. Learning to track my food was an adventure in itself... learning to stay IN the calorie range was even tougher. Trying to get in 8 glasses of water per day was pure torture! Who cou... Tue, 1 Jul 2014 06:18:45 EST Once Upon A Time...(36/41) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5728117 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/2/l1239184042.jpg"> <BR> <BR> <em>188</em> Once upon a time, a long long time ago, in a far away land... there was a girl named Stephanie who had lost her motivation. It didn't happen all at once, it was a gradual decline. It started with a bad day here or there, then it was every other day that was a bad one... and then <em>530</em> Everyday was off track... she was eating and eating and doing the bare minimum in exercise, and she didn'... Sun, 29 Jun 2014 03:06:44 EST What I Learned From The Great Bod Pod Fiasco... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5726087 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/4/l549620298.jpg"> <BR> <BR> So first off, I'm not complaining at all that my Spark Blog was featured in the Spark mail, that is always an honor and privilege and always blows me away when it happens! But I do have to say I was a little embarrassed/mortified that my Bod Pod Meltdown ended up in the Spark mail. <em>246</em> I wrote that in the heat of the moment, when I had gotten home from my Bod Pod testing, and my emotions were running hi... Thu, 26 Jun 2014 05:45:23 EST Me and my bright ideas.... (BOD POD) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5725862 It took everything for me not to cry getting the results. I knew it would be high, but I kept joking with a coworker I didn't want to be half fat. Well guess what, I am 49.9% fat. <em>46</em> There was a part of the test where you must blow into a tube and it measures the Thoracic gas volume... it said every time I was "high" so we did it 4 times and he finally said we will just do predicted. So it estimated that part based on my height and weight... I am not sure how much that could skew ... Wed, 25 Jun 2014 19:45:14 EST If You Don't Toot Your Own Horn, Who Will?! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5723814 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/9/8/l98805087.jpg"> <BR> <em>215</em> <em>321</em> <em>215</em> <em>321</em> <em>215</em> <em>321</em> <em>215</em> <em>321</em> <em>215</em> <em>321</em> <BR> After entering my most recent status update here on Spark... I realized something. My "spark feed" is update after update of me tooting my own horn. <em>246</em> <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/0/l1079026993.jpg"> <BR> <BR> My first though... Mon, 23 Jun 2014 03:23:51 EST The Ultimate Weight Loss Reward... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5721819 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/6/1/l619541191.jpg"> <BR> ^My beautiful Billy. <BR> <BR> When I started this weight loss journey in March of 2012, I tried the whole reward system. You know the one... <BR> <BR> Lose XX pounds or XX% and get <em>144</em> <BR> <BR> For some reason, it did not motivate me at all. There is nothing wrong with that reward system, it just did nothing for me at the time, and I ended up abandoning it altogether. <BR> <BR> But when my coworker and... Fri, 20 Jun 2014 03:07:10 EST Trying To Beat Self Sabotage... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5720322 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/7/0/l707037763.jpg"> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/3/l1320716838.jpg"> <BR> This morning I took a sneak peek at the scale... I weigh in every Wednesday and record it on Spark and for the BLC. But usually by Monday or Tuesday I start to get antsy and want to know where I stand so I hop on. If the scale rings true again tomorrow I will be somewhere in the region of 186.6... and that is the <em>230</em> zone for me! How do... Wed, 18 Jun 2014 03:20:28 EST How Is This My Life?! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5716920 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/9/l1985406471.jpg"> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/5/l1504897437.jpg"> <BR> ^Earned my second one of these today! <em>334</em> <em>208</em> <BR> <BR> Today I got to take my mom to the Zoo. According to my Fitbit we walked 5.6 miles! Not only that, but I still owed Sparky a much needed walk, so I went 1.5 miles with him. If you would have told me 2 years ago that I was going to get to a point on my journey where I c... Fri, 13 Jun 2014 03:04:14 EST Time To Crunch The Numbers... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5713218 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/8/8/l882600378.jpg"> <BR> Anyone who has ever tried to lose weight has done the whole "numbers game" before. We know weight loss is all about CICO (calories in, calories out), and that roughly 3500 calories = 1 pound of fat. Most everyone wants to reach that 2 pounds per week mark (okay, we REALLY want more, but 2 pounds is the top of the healthy range, so it'll do)... which means that deficit of 7,000 calories, coming out to 1,000 per day. Then ... Sun, 8 Jun 2014 04:33:56 EST Trip To The Zoo & Weekly Weigh In http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5710996 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/6/l1686913941.jpg"> <BR> <em>134</em> I love animals, and I could talk all day about the trip to the Zoo... wait, don't leave! <em>246</em> I will try to keep it to the highlights. I will attach a bunch of photos to the bottom of this, so if you are interested in just the goods, feel free to head straight there. <em>211</em> <BR> <BR> Highlights: <BR> <em>219</em> A little girl, maybe 5 years old walked up to the meerkat exhibit a... Thu, 5 Jun 2014 03:55:06 EST Like A Little Kid On Christmas... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5709442 Last night I was like a little kid excited that it was almost Christmas morning! The recumbent bike I ordered last week was finally to be delivered today! <em>316</em> I live in a condo, and I often hear cars or track passing by (stinkin' thin walls <em>246</em> )... I thought I heard the delivery truck and even got up to check but I was wrong. So I headed back to bed. I had a doctor's appointment, and checked one more time, nothing. <em>39</em> I came back home, still nothing... RATS... Tue, 3 Jun 2014 03:03:08 EST Time To Start LIVING! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5707845 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/8/l180447708.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I have to say, at 28 years old, I have allowed my weight to hold me back from doing SOOOOOOO many things. I know that it was my fault and my choice... all of it was. I am responsible for the weight gain, and I am responsible for missing out on things because I was too upset or embarrassed about my weight. There are overweight and obese people that are living life everyday, and living it to the fullest... I unfortun... Sun, 1 Jun 2014 03:03:30 EST Happy Days Are Here Again... (NSV, Rubber Bands, Etc) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5706488 First off, thanks to everyone for the support, words of encouragement and advice on my last blog about my coworker Saboteur! <em>334</em> I was really just venting because I was so annoyed, but the response from all of you made me realize I need to remember who I am dealing with and not let her get the best of me. She is going to be the way she is regardless, so I just need to take care of myself, stand my ground, and not put anymore time or investment into trying not to hurt her feelings o... Fri, 30 May 2014 03:06:03 EST Get Outta My Way! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5704883 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/5/l1518594205.jpg">; <BR> I have a coworker that is an awful saboteur when it comes to me trying to lose weight! I could go into all the things I've dealt with over the years... but I personally do not want to relive all those things. So I will try to give enough background information to paint the picture here: <BR> <BR> She is in her 50's, loves to cook, loves to feed people, is at least 40 pounds overweight for her frame (and has put on 20 ... Wed, 28 May 2014 03:09:35 EST This Could Be The Start Of Something Good... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5701853 Sometimes we feel like we need a fresh start or a fresh perspective on this weight loss journey. I have seen people reset their tickers, or go as far as resetting their entire account or even making a shiny new account. Whatever works to keep us on this journey is definitely the way to go! For me, this journey is on going and as it's a lifestyle, it never ends. The idea of clearing out my Spark page or making a new account doesn't interest me (although I see why some people would want to go d... Sat, 24 May 2014 03:30:33 EST Obligation VS. Desire http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5701198 <em>149</em> The definition of obligation is as follows: an act or course of action to which a person is morally or legally bound; a duty or commitment. <BR> <BR> <em>149</em> The definition of desire is as follows: a strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen. <BR> <BR> When I started this journey over 2 years ago, I had a strong desire to lose weight. I wanted to lose weight, I wanted to feel better both mentally and physically, and I wanted to bec... Fri, 23 May 2014 03:37:53 EST Time For A Reality Check! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5697408 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/6/8/l680882884.jpg"> <BR> <BR> You know the feeling... that first initial gain... "Oh, it's only 5 pounds. Nothing to worry about! It's probably just water weight, yeah that's it. It'll come back off, nothing to be alarmed about". That is all fine and dandy, until it's 10 pounds, then it's 12 pounds and your pants are starting to cut off your circulation. <em>246</em> That's the feeling I had today putting on my work pants... <em>15</em> I ... Sun, 18 May 2014 03:07:44 EST This Is Where I'm At... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5693034 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/2/l1263790249.jpg"> <BR> <em>228</em> Disclaimer: I am in no way, shape or form complaining about Spark, or whining in any way. I love Spark, always have and always will. I am also so incredibly blessed to have so much support from my Spark friends and I assure you I NEVER EVER take that for granted. That support and kindness is what has kept me going on days where I really wanted to just throw in the towel and give up. There is no better pl... Mon, 12 May 2014 03:07:24 EST The 190's Are Like A Bad Boyfriend... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5686188 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/0/l1003628597.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Picture it, southern California, July 23, 2013. A 27 year old girl gets on the scale to reveal the Onederful number 199.6! She was officially in Onederland for the first time in at least 9 years! It was a tremendous day, celebrations with Spark friends and an amazing sense of accomplishment. The 190's were a beautiful sight to see, and gave that girl so much happiness! <BR> <BR> Fast forward to present day, May 3... Sat, 3 May 2014 03:05:49 EST Looking At The Bigger Picture http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5682864 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/1/l511674956.jpg"> <BR> I have gained quite a few pounds in the last couple of weeks. I was eating like it was going out of style. I know exactly how those pounds got there, and I am not ashamed. I did it, I made choices, and I am human. I never expected this journey to be perfect or easy, so I have learned to roll with the punches. <em>326</em> With that said, my pants are a little tighter, walking is becoming more of a chore instead of bei... Tue, 29 Apr 2014 03:02:54 EST Getting Off The Merry Go Round! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5680684 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/0/l1004699317.jpg"> <BR> In my last blog, I talked about how screwing up and giving up were two different things. Giving up meant throwing in the towel, no longer caring about your weight loss journey and leaving all of your healthy habits in the dust. Screwing up meant that you were momentarily doing the wrong thing, but had every intention of getting back to business. I truly do believe we have it in us to turn things around even when time ge... Sat, 26 Apr 2014 03:05:10 EST Screwing Up VS. Giving Up http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5678376 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/3/2/l322151765.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I pretty much consider myself an expert on the topic of "giving up" when it comes to weight loss. In all my previous attempts, I always ended up throwing in the towel. I managed to quit Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Nutrisystem (twice) and even Spark People twice in the past. Lately I have been off track and screwing up, but I am realizing there is such a huge difference between that and giving up. <BR> <BR> Givin... Wed, 23 Apr 2014 04:39:27 EST Me?! In A Walking Group?! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5674041 Joining a walking group probably wouldn't be a big deal to most, but it is a huge deal for me for two reasons. The first is physical, I was a girl who was 272 pounds and would go up 7 stairs to my bedroom and have to stop and rest. I am obviously not that same girl anymore, but I do still have arthritis in my knees, a metal plate in my leg and screws in my ankle. The second reason is the fact that I am shy at first, so agreeing to join a GROUP of strangers was something I would have never don... Thu, 17 Apr 2014 05:27:15 EST