SOULFISH80's SparkPeople Blog SOULFISH80's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Just blog..... Feeling down. Had a blow up with my sister last night. She left on foot to a friend's house. I feel terrible, but she's not better yet, and is very aggressive. She told us our marriage is horrible and lots of other not nice things, then she left. Very stressful. On a lighter note, I'm getting lighter. So this is good. Every couple days a lb drops off. I'm still not back to 40 lbs lost, but I'm past 35 lost, with a functional scale, so this is good. Moving right along. Got some fit mins in ... Mon, 24 Oct 2016 16:51:31 EST Just great! Things are going great this week, for the most part. My sister is on her way home with my Mom today. This is ending a month of worries. What's next remains to be seen, and hopefully it's smooth sailing from here. The scale is steadily showing a lighter weight every day or so. This is good. I've been pretty tight with my diet and water and have gotten a lil exercise in there too. I'm happy to know that this is my true weight, the scale is right, so all is well in this area. I've been cooking... Thu, 20 Oct 2016 18:52:54 EST New week's happenings So my sister is finally getting to come home on Wednesday. I was supposed to go with my Mom to help with what has to be done the next couple of days, but my husband put his foot down. He offered to go, again, with my Mom. As if the week he spent there earlier in the month wasn't fun enough. But my Mom refused his help. Her reasoning didn't make sense to me, but now I don't feel too bad for not going. She could have had help, but refused it.. my guilt can subside, right? I hope it goes th... Tue, 18 Oct 2016 13:08:58 EST Things.... It's a gorgeous day. I'm at work, doors open, smell of rain wafting through, so lovely. I get to go home in 2 hours, so that should be nice. I have some light cleaning, changing sheets, kitchen and vacuuming to do when I get home. Nothing major. I'd planned a nature walk today, but the place I go is closed today, so I need to go on a weekday. The scale discrepancies did not end up in my favor. In fact it ended up 10 lbs not in my favor after I finally changed the batteries in my scale. I've ... Sat, 15 Oct 2016 13:16:39 EST Scale woes There was some wavering with weight between numbers when I weighed this morning. So I reweighed a couple times and got readings anywhere from 299-316....Pretty big difference. So I changed the batteries, there was less wavering, but still a little. The numbers it came back to the most were 304, and 311. I was 306 yesterday.....or so I thought. So in my world either of those numbers could make sense. Of course 304 would be a 2 lb loss and obviously the other would be a 5 lb gain. Now I'm wonde... Wed, 12 Oct 2016 12:57:03 EST 41!!!! I hit my mini milestone today!!!!!! Yes, so happy!!! I've lost 41 lbs in three months. I'm proud of myself! Only 7 more and I break under 300! 9 more til 50 lost!!! Oh boy I'm excited! I love you spark peeps! Twoderland here I come, lol! Tue, 11 Oct 2016 11:22:57 EST Down baby! Lost a lb, finally!!!!! 2 lbs away from 40 lost. I'm happy! Already have my reward present picked out. Waiting is the hard part!!! I was up 5 then down 6 this week. Just goes to show that water weight can really account for a lot! I was supposed to go visiting today, but it fell through. I've been sleeping all morning instead! Feels nice. Would like to get up and get going now. Just not sure in what direction!! Maybe a nice, long walk? I'm sure after a shower I'll have a better idea what toda... Mon, 10 Oct 2016 15:30:56 EST Crisp, Fall weekend <img src=""> <BR> This has been a quick moving couple of days. We had a lil date yesterday after work, and I didn't go off my diet....nice one girl :) Got the car washed after our dinner date, it really needed it. I tried out a new recipe that I really like. It is a cauliflower rice bread substitute. It was yummy and easy to make. I'd like to do a large batch next time. After that we watched a lil TV and I went to... Sun, 9 Oct 2016 19:22:41 EST The seriousness of Inflammation <img src=""> So, tons of fun stuff going on. But I need to blog and possibly reblog about my body and inflammation. The culprits are, so far, simple carbs and sugar. I'm sure I have lil issues with other foods, but these two are my biggies. I mentally went through my last two weeks thinking of some of the things that passed my wasn't great. Some sugar and even more simple carbs. And even though I didn't g... Fri, 7 Oct 2016 12:50:09 EST Hmmmm, really? Well, this morning started off bummerish, I gained 4 lbs and I was not happy. Yeah, overnight. Didn't go off diet yesterday, but I somehow think it's water. Haven't had enough lately. That and sodium, probably had too much. So, it is what it is. Started off with my eggs and a full jug of water. So that's going in the right direction. I'm kinda excited though, because I might be moving into a new business opportunity. It's not for sure, but it could be exciting. Plus we'd (the owner here and... Thu, 6 Oct 2016 13:01:41 EST New findings I just found out I had to do a little something else to see my friends posts on a popular social network that shall remain nameless. I just thought tons of people dropped off the face of the planet. Nearly a year I've been using it and only seeing a few people's posts. It was like a family reunion this morning!!! I missed their shining faces :) My sister has a hearing today to find out if she's released. I hope she is so we can get this ball moving forward. But not if she's not ready, of cou... Wed, 5 Oct 2016 12:25:04 EST Feeling Fine I split my weekend almost in half, deep sleep/resting and full blown cleaning and cooking. It was pretty amazing. I got everything done, and more. Tim even commented on how clean the place even smells amazing. I tracked 4 hours heavy cleaning but it was probably closer to 8 or more, split between two days. I'll take the four, still don't know if I burned the calories it said. Still happy that every stitch of cleaning got done, including items I hadn't originally factored in, like... Tue, 4 Oct 2016 12:26:48 EST Break time <img src=""> Sparkpeople just shared this, I love it! I'm so pleased with my day so far. Everything on my to do list is done except bathroom, shower and sheets. I cleaned fridge and freezer, swept and mopped kitchen and entryway, vacuumed and shampooed carpets, did catbox and folded all the laundry. I may add dusting and pledging wood surfaces to the mix if I get the bathroom and shower done early enough. Feeling v... Mon, 3 Oct 2016 18:21:25 EST Full Fall Day All the windows are open, it's completely overcast and drizzling and my coffee is brewing. I went to the store. Picked up a spaghetti squash, cauliflower and broccoli. Two kinds of sausage, chicken thighs, alfredo and marinara sauce for the squash and V8, mmm. Also stuff for my buttermilk dressing, can't live without that! For today I have changing of sheets, folding laundery, vacuuming, carpet shampooing, clean fridge and freezer, catbox, bathroom and shower and sweeping and moping all floo... Mon, 3 Oct 2016 12:40:32 EST What will be I slept and slept and feel like I need to sleep more. The cold really kicked in yesterday and along with my period, I was thoroughly wiped out. I managed to get a healthy meal in today, which I'm happy about. I need to shop, which I'm not happy about :/ The laundery is going, mega dish pile got tackled and finished. Plans for carpet shampooing tomorrow are underway. It's needed it for months. I'm looking forward to that. Tim and Mom are sorting things out at Michelle's. I'm not sure exactl... Sun, 2 Oct 2016 18:20:30 EST Weekend begins I just got home from work and made Tim's lunch....biscuits and gravy. I'd love to say I didn't eat any, but I did. Not much, almost no gravy, but I had two biscuits....not exactly low carb diet food. I do have dinner planned, thank goodness. And it is diet appropriate. I really have to get back in the swing of things. It seems to be just one meal I've been slacking on. And, of course, I haven't been having my eggs in the am. Surefire way to ruin my eating for the day. I'm flowing like Niagar... Sat, 1 Oct 2016 16:28:35 EST Week in review It's Friday, yay! So much went on this week, but the happy part is Mom and Tim come home today. Yaahhooo!! My sis is staying there, by court order, in a hospital. So that means another Vegas trip in the future, but I'm not going there with that right now. One day at a time. I just wanna hug my baby, can't wait. The week could have been better, but it could have been so much worse. I didn't gain even an happy. I didn't weigh today because it's the first day of my monthlies, so I'm... Fri, 30 Sep 2016 14:51:10 EST Good things Focused on the good things. I'm home, and at work now. Saw an old client I love this morning. It was nice. Glad to be back. It was only 4 days gone, but it was a long 4 days. I weighed this morning and didn't gain an ounce! Thank God, I'm so happy. My food wasn't great these last couple days, but I did my best and that was good enough!!!! Yippeeeeeeee! My sister is safe in a psych ward. My Mom and hubs are having troubles with her car. But hopefully they'll sort that out today. They've bee... Thu, 29 Sep 2016 14:14:40 EST Little comments My aunt and I got in a little tiff yesterday. We've never gotten along well and I dreaded coming here to stay this long. I called her son to ask if he'd call her today to make sure she was ok. She was sulking yesterday and I didn't want to upset her, but she asked a few of the wrong questions and I answered honestly. Her son, in so many words, told me to kiss off. He also said "my Mom has put her problems on the back burner for your Mom's problems"??????? Excuse me? Our mother's have lived t... Wed, 28 Sep 2016 13:20:55 EST Allergies I'm allergic to something that grows in this town. I'm all stuffy and watery. I woke up early to go be with my cat for a few hours. He was sitting right at the door when I opened it, poor baby. I hate to leave him alone, but it costs 20 bucks in gas to drive home, so I can't go everyday. He seemed fine after an hour or so. We napped and played, then it was time to come back. My sister got transported to the psych ward at a nearby hospital. My Mom and hubs got to see her, finally. Tim said it... Tue, 27 Sep 2016 18:01:31 EST The day My aunt and I took a drive to the little delta town of Isleton. It was a nice day, a nice drive and a nice lunch. The town's buildings are really old and run down and yet it is still kind of cool. It's only 5 miles from here and sits right on the Sacramento River. It's quaint. The food was good and afordable. On our way back into town we went to the only grocery store they have, which is not affordable at all! My aunt grabbed a couple things and we got home before the heat completely consumed... Mon, 26 Sep 2016 20:30:05 EST Funday.... I titled my blog this in hopes to change my mind about today! I'm not really having too much fun. I'm aunt sitting for my very sick aunt. She lives with my Mom and my Mom and hubs are on their way to Vegas to bail my sister out of jail. I'm really anxious for all of this to be over, but fear it won't be for awhile. If my sister can't pay her rent, she'll be moving in with us! Not an exciting idea, especially if she's not mentally stable. I have to pray for the best and know it will all work ... Sun, 25 Sep 2016 19:45:59 EST Losing again I lost 1.5 lbs off my lowest weight this month. I'm happy because I was fighting those last couple lbs tooth and nail. I've been super busy, have 2 .5 hrs of fit mins I haven't tracked yet. My foods been good but not perfect, but apparently everything is ok. The situation may be getting better with my sis. My husband volunteered to go with my Mom to Vegas to settle things. I think she's happy to have a man go with her. I hope you all have a good weekend ♡ Sat, 24 Sep 2016 14:47:03 EST Au gratin!! <img src=""> <BR> Spaghetti squash au gratin. Comfort, low carb food. When feeling down ...cook! Thu, 22 Sep 2016 22:10:56 EST The unblog I feel like I can't just blog about my sister and this situation everyday, so I won't. Nothing interesting besides that has really me. On the other hand, the woman that owns the business I work under, had her boyfriend hang himself in her backyard while I was in Vegas. Yeah, very bad. She did, however, save his life. Amazing right! She stabilized him and then cut him down from her backyard patio beams. It's a really wild time in her life and mine, so we got together at her plac... Thu, 22 Sep 2016 12:57:44 EST 24hr Vegas trip We got home at 10pm last night, we were gone exactly 24hrs, we did pretty good considering it's a 9 hr drive! There was very little stopping and very little time spent there....obviously. Once we found out that my sister wasn't going to be released, we jumped in the car and came right back. We drove right past my home town and I even saw a friend I haven't seen in over 20 years. He was managing a truck stop that we stopped at. It was a very random encounter. He asked about my brother who happ... Wed, 21 Sep 2016 14:36:40 EST Oh my wow.... After searching for my sister....I finally found out she is in jail in Las Vegas. She's bipolar, so my mother, brother and I are driving all night to see if we can get her out and to a Dr. Wish me luck, I haven't napped or rested at all today. Hopefully I'll sleep the first leg of the trip. I've packed healthy food so hopefully my diet won't be disturbed at all. Here's to nothing..... Tue, 20 Sep 2016 02:26:34 EST Day's events <img src=""> <BR> I am having a busy day off ;) Started my morning off with laundry. It's all done and sorted, woo hoo. Ran to the store, made hubs his breakfast and put a butternut and spaghetti squash in to roast. They look and smell awesome! I'm going to dice up the butternut and have some of the spaghetti for dinner. I have a Dr. appointment in Davis at 1:30 and then off to care for my sister's cat. She's bee... Mon, 19 Sep 2016 15:31:09 EST Cooking <img src=""> The photo is my husband's dinner last night. Roasted veggies and filet mignon. I had thin sliced rib eye, roasted carrots and mashed cauliflower. It was a great dinner. For dessert I had "fat bombs", a dessert I found through an SP, low carb blog. It was the easiest thing, sugar free jello made with 1/2 cup cream substituting some of the water. I cut the water down a bit so the jello flavor would be st... Sun, 18 Sep 2016 18:09:56 EST Little things I had an awesome lunch out yesterday and was able to change it to suite my dietary needs. I'm so glad I thought outside the box and asked if they could accommodate my needs. It was a big win for me! You never know if you don't ask! (Plus I didn't gain any, so I'm pretty sure that could be a go-to meal when I'm out, around town in the future. ) I bought a kettle ball, and one of those roly, stomache strengthener deals. I used to have one and like it. I also bought some pure lavender oil for s... Sat, 17 Sep 2016 12:18:01 EST Fridaaaayyyyy Tim comes home tomorrow, which is great, I missed that guy this week! It's been a low energy week. I gave myself the benefit of the doubt, and figured I may still be detoxing. I've only been at it for a month, so this is probably the case. I haven't cranked out any fit mins in a couple of days, but I have been sticking to my eating plan. I could use a little help on water also, been at about 5-7 cups instead of my full 8. I'm hoping for a great weekend. The weather is glorious and I have a ... Fri, 16 Sep 2016 12:18:35 EST When things change.... This is a changing time of year. It's noticeably cooler and getting darker earlier. This time of year is magical to me and I'm soaking it up. I've been watching Fall themed/witchy themed movies and shows. For some reason I'm craving NY shows, because NY=Fall, right???! Anyway, I'm embracing the changes in the air, whole heartedly. I'm getting really excited about my upcoming trip. We're going to see Burney Falls. My Mom was partially raised there and I've never seen the falls. I've wanted to... Thu, 15 Sep 2016 13:16:35 EST Educational Each day holds new education about myself and specifically my body and it's been fun! The cutting coffe experiment was a huge fail, for now. I've had coffee with breakfast since high school, it's going to take a lot to successfully cut it out. I'm fine with that, it's my lil treat in the morning and the way I drink it, the carbs/calories are minimal. So, coffee stays for now. Not sure where the protein shake fits into things now. It's definitely not my breakfast replacement, learned that qu... Wed, 14 Sep 2016 12:27:18 EST Eggs Just posting this as a self reminder. Breakfast=eggs, PERIOD!!! Jeeze. I've had a few days of not eating my eggs for breakfast, including today. I bought a nice protein shake and thought it would make a good breakfast. Uh uh, I was hungry by 11, starved by 12 and this was with almonds and veggies for snacks. By my 1pm lunch I wanted to eat my hand off. I'd rather gag eating my eggs because I'm so full, than eat my hand off!!! Stephanie, you are eating eggs for breakfast tomorrow! No experimen... Tue, 13 Sep 2016 18:07:18 EST New Week I start my work week on Tuesday, so I always think Tuesday is Monday! I work on Saturday, so it all evens out :) I didn't bring coffee this morning, just my pea protein /almond milk shake. So far I'm not missing my coffee, but we'll see. I was able to drink some of the shake without gagging, so this may be my new breakfast, for now. I also brought one of my monster bags of veggies, just in case I feel like I need to eat something. The veggie bags have been a super big hit so far. They are gal... Tue, 13 Sep 2016 12:04:56 EST Changes underway So, I may have weighed too early in the am for an accurate weight. After doing a few things and then laying back down for awhile I weighed myself again, just to be sure. And my 5 lb gain in 3 days turned out to be a 2 lb gain. Better, but a gain is a gain and I'm sticking to my new ideas for change. I picked up almond milk, vegan pea protein and some more veg. I cooked up some cauliflower and chicken leg quarters. I'm prepared for the first half of next week. I tried out the protein shake and... Mon, 12 Sep 2016 21:35:29 EST Drawing board Trigger foods. Today is the 3rd day of gaining in a row. I am up 5 lbs and was really stumped as to what is going on, until I thought about it a bit and I think I may have some ideas. I haven't been tracking my foods this whole month, until yesterday. In the past I didn't track when I ate a low carb diet and had no problems losing weight just mentally tracking carbs. Well, I'm not going to do that anymore. I have the tools, so use them!!! Eggs. Everyday I eat eggs I maintain or lose. Everyda... Mon, 12 Sep 2016 07:49:04 EST No bread Cutting carbs is pretty easy. Especially the no bread. To me the star attractions of the sandwich shines with no bread. I just had a blt without bread. It was so tasty, I'm dreaming up all the other sandwiches I want to eat this way. Turkey, roast beef and pepperjack, tuna, chicken. Just delicious! It's all the flavor without the bread getting in the way. If you are bored with your meals, try some lettuce wraps! You'll be shocked at how much better things taste without the bread!!! Sun, 11 Sep 2016 12:40:11 EST Veggies ☆☆☆☆ <img src=""> <BR> Made up veggie bags. Best idea I've had in awhile! They're so cute ◇ Sat, 10 Sep 2016 19:42:41 EST Believe <img src=""> <BR> I believe......♡ Sat, 10 Sep 2016 13:18:14 EST Accountability Experiment In the past I loved posting lbs lost and just plain wouldn't post lbs gained. It was a sign that I was not willing to be responsible and accountable to myself. Blogs are ultimately for me. If I can't get the truth out for myself to work with, then I really can't reach my goal. One day at a time. So, in experiments there is no guilt, some things work some don't. Draw conclusions and go from there. This particular experiment is a life long one, so there is definitely no way I will feel guilty e... Sat, 10 Sep 2016 13:02:44 EST Rewards <img src=""> I took myself out for a rewards night. I've never done this with weight loss before, but yesterday it just felt right. I took myself to dinner, bought myself new pants and an expensive hair treatment that I love and rarely buy. I also ended up eyeballing, then buying a pair of Swarovski Crystal earrings. I've looked at these earrings for 15 years and thought they were a little pricey for what they are,... Fri, 9 Sep 2016 12:18:32 EST Tons of good stuff One small spark really does start a flame! I lost another lb. 35 down!!! Feels great. I can almost taste that 50 lbs lost milestone! In the past losing 15 lbs felt like climbing Mt. Everest, but now, with the low carb lifestyle, it seems easy. What's 15 more? These 35 have slide off pretty easily. I know it won't always be this way, but for now I'm soaking it all in!!! Tim doesn't throw compliments around very often. If you hear one from him you know he really means it. I got a very sincere,... Thu, 8 Sep 2016 14:59:16 EST I can see it. I just lost a blog I'd been working on all morning. I'm going to make this short because that was annoying, but I want to catalogue these experiences for myself. Today is the first day I can see the weight loss. It's mainly by how my clothes fit, but I see this as a really good thing. I was wondering when I'd be able to see any change, and today is the day. I was a size 18 for years and years. Last year I zoomed up to a size 23, then outgrew those and moved into all stretchy pants. I'm now b... Wed, 7 Sep 2016 14:05:11 EST Sliiiiiiiding So according to SP calculations I took off my last 2 period lbs plus 2 more, according to my calculations it was the period lbs plus 1. Just a matter of ounces I guess. Either way 3 or 4 lost overnight makes my day. Now I'm back on the countdown, 16 away from my next goal, which will be a 50 lb pound loss for the year. That will be the most weight I have lost in over 20 years. I'm looking forward to it. It will also put me back into the 200's, and well on my way to Onederland....ok, on my way... Tue, 6 Sep 2016 12:32:07 EST Labor Day Yesterday was spent eating date lunch leftovers and watching movies. We did get a short walk in and also lot's of RandR. I needed it, last week was particularly hard for me. I've started the laundery, we live in an apartment, so that entails dragging all my dirty laundry to the laundromat. The washers/dryers are here, on site, but it's always a 2 hour (miniumum) activity. I dream for the day we live in a place where we can have our own. I may be making a trip to the store, which I already ... Mon, 5 Sep 2016 12:51:21 EST Long weekend This Labor Day weekend is just a normal length weekend, minus 3 hours, for me. But, Tim has been home since Friday afternoon, and doesn't go back until Tuesday morning. Pretty fun. Our date day ended up better than I thought, complete with public hand holding, mutual appreciation of the food and tons of yummy leftovers that I can eat!!! Ok, public handholding, whaaaattttt? Yeah, well, marriage has it's ups and downs, so yes, that is something, at this moment, that makes me happy. We've hit 12... Sun, 4 Sep 2016 14:05:38 EST PerSonAl..... So, just realized I didn't have a BM yesterday, or this morning. Very weird for me. I'm usually a 3 before work kinda girl. So, I'm going to break out the psyllium husk. When I did this diet in the past it was part of my everyday routine. I forgot about it this time, so I'm happy that I already have some. I thought all the veg I'm consuming would be enough fiber for my system, but apparently it's not. Date day! Tim wants to go out today. He didn't get fired, so I guess he wants to celebrate.... Sat, 3 Sep 2016 13:30:17 EST Visualization When I was 155 lbs I couldn't visualize myself as healthy or my body as being attractive. Well, I've been visualizing myself in a healthy, attractive body for some time now. I even see body types in random places and think to myself how my body might compare when I get healthy. This may sound creepy, but I know that my mindset is 75 percent of the battle. If I can't see myself healthy, then I can't get there. I woke up an hour early today. Usually I roll over and sleep my hour away when that... Fri, 2 Sep 2016 12:08:45 EST Pheromones Oh jeeze!!!! Just now two muscled, young men came into the shop. They were chatting about the gym. I told them I was losing weight now and focused on my diet. After about ten mins of chatting they both told me I look good and one asked me to lunch.....after asking if I was married and me telling him I was! Lol! Does weight loss produce more pheromones? I remember the last time I lost weight, at about a 25 lb loss I started getting random attention like this. I know it's not the way I look, I'... Thu, 1 Sep 2016 15:35:01 EST