SOFT_VAL67's SparkPeople Blog SOFT_VAL67's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community brother can you spare They say, when it rains, it pours. Well, that has literally been the case here for the last week. While I really do enjoy the cooler temps, for walking and sleeping. I dread the coming winter and I am sick of darkness and dreary days. <BR> And it has also been that way figuratively as well. <BR> After working a regular shift on Sunday, Honey, who was pretty sick from a bad cold and sore throat, went out to work anyway on Monday and about an hour later, arrived back home, with a lay off slip.... Wed, 17 Sep 2014 10:42:51 EST i have no bucket list, i dont even have a bucket I guess I have taken a short break from SP, without even really intending to. <BR> I didnt realize it had been 4 days since I last blogged. Actually have taken a short break from most social media. I went thru my FB list and unfriended about 20 more people the other day. <BR> <BR> I hardly speak to these people, I never see them post anything. If I were to run into them in the flesh, they wouldnt speak to me, some of them probably wouldnt even nod hello. <BR> I had done the same thing her... Sun, 14 Sep 2014 09:42:52 EST on this day It is this time of year. This month. September. Almost every day holds some memory, someones birth, or death, anniversary. <BR> The 10th thru the 14th especially hold special memories for me. <BR> I am not sure what date it was, probably around the 2nd of 2012 that my car window got busted out by a stray rock thrown off the weedeater of one of the city work crew. <BR> He was out there today cutting weeds while I walked. <BR> Took me back to all the days I have walked, things I have seen, p... Wed, 10 Sep 2014 10:57:04 EST early morning mind ramble I am feeling kinda bad this morning. I have been up since 4, and here at nearly 630, I am really wishing I had laid back down. <BR> Have an early morning appointment, so I just decided to stay up and get the day started. <BR> Have had my coffee and getting ready to run the sweeper thru the house, then jump in the shower. <BR> I have had the beginnings of a sore throat the last two days, but luckily I woke up this morning not feeling it. <BR> Really I think I should have slept. <BR> <BR> But ... Tue, 9 Sep 2014 06:13:01 EST mold mildew and malaise I know I am probably going to sound like a hypochondriac and maybe I am becoming one, but I have been doing some reading and I believe I have developed this neurological problem, what is causing the numbness in my foot, from exposure to black mold. Very high exposure. <BR> Here is my reason why I feel this way. <BR> I own an older mobile home and no one has lived there for some time. In June, I was staying there and stayed there for about 2 weeks, well, after I came home, the very first nigh... Sat, 6 Sep 2014 07:08:22 EST wake me up when september ends!! Here it is, September. <BR> This month holds many dates for me. Some good. Some not so good and some I just as soon forget. <BR> Well, not really. I think even the bad things that happen to us, happen for a reason and mold us and shape us. <BR> I have often said I am going to get a tattoo of just the word September. Then I wont ever be able to forget the things that pain me so deeply. And the good things too. <BR> It is a mixed bag. <BR> I havent walked in a few days. It has either raine... Mon, 1 Sep 2014 09:06:39 EST drum roll please....and the winner is..... <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I still need to find a doctor to tell me what I need to do from here. <BR> Basically, I guess it is telling me I have moderate neuropathy. <BR> What is causing it? <BR> Could be one of many things I read, weight, low b12, diabetes, which I do NOT have. poor thyroid function. metabolic disorder, which I know I do have. <BR> But those would likely cause neuropathy elsewhere in my body. <BR> Poor circulation, but my c... Fri, 29 Aug 2014 09:03:14 EST just an overall pretty decent day despite one or two small complaints First, I am just going to say this, and this is just my own opinion, I do not care at all for the new format on SP. <BR> I constantly have trouble finding my friend feed and I dont like these changes, I never liked the new start page. <BR> It is getting as bad as FB to make changes when everything was working just fine. <BR> Ok, that being said, moving right along. <BR> <BR> I have been trying to add some personal touches to my home. I bought some little plastic bowls, filled them with the ... Wed, 27 Aug 2014 20:44:33 EST some good gains and some great losses So far today has been pretty good. Compared to yesterday. I called to ask, after 3 weeks if there were any reports back about my foot. <BR> I was spoken to in a very rude manner by the woman at the Neurologists office. This was my own fault, I had my reservations about going there but I gave in and wanted fast results, well, lo and behold, still nothing. <BR> I called my doctors office and asked her nurse to see if they could get any news for me. And as of yesterday, they were told the tes... Tue, 26 Aug 2014 14:00:05 EST nothing new I havent been here much the last few days. <BR> I have been dealing with a flooded driveway, that will need a new drain pipe across the creek to keep from future flooding. This is my landlords issue to decide upon. <BR> I can not get to my place right now without parking across the street and walking. Not a far walk, but a nuisance all the same. <BR> I was lucky, the drain could have clogged much worse and flooded my whole yard. <BR> Also, I have been dealing with a jimminy cricket, the nice... Sun, 24 Aug 2014 10:45:40 EST on second thought Walked again today. For only 30 minutes, but it was ok. My problem wasnt my foot alone. <BR> I had other things I had to get done this evening, namely cleaning the kitchen and getting things moved to get ready to paint next week. <BR> I went to the cemetery to visit my brothers grave and had to check the mail and go to the bank. <BR> So, while I was there I went ahead and walked since the track is right there. <BR> and it was still very hot out. <BR> I really need to try next week to do morni... Tue, 19 Aug 2014 22:34:03 EST fiber filled sunday sumday. I spark and I track and I track my food!! <BR> and yet no matter what I add or change or exchange I can never get my fiber up on SP. <BR> I think when those foods were added onto sp the fiber content wasnt added. <BR> So, from now on I am going to manually add my own foods and spark from my food favorites list. It is the only way I can be sure I am tracking my fiber. <BR> I know I am eating more than 2 grams of fiber. I have been adding ground flax to alot of my meals. I dont understand wh... Sun, 17 Aug 2014 10:27:25 EST i walked in my new shoes. (review, and pics!) <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> The new shoes arrived yesterday. <BR> I had hardly heard of the brand, Saucony, until I seen them online, and only had online revie... Fri, 15 Aug 2014 20:00:50 EST shoes and feet and weight and scales and coffee and such Something I learned today doing some online research. <BR> The shoes I had ordered and had to send back, due to the wrong size, wouldnt have been very good for me anyway. <BR> As I was reading about shoes that work well with orthotic inserts, I read that instead of stability shoes, which I had been focusing on, I should be wearing neutral shoes. <BR> The article said that stability shoes coupled with orthotic inserts, puts too much support on the foot from different angles and allows little t... Mon, 11 Aug 2014 14:13:09 EST do you really count?? do we really count?? Calories? <BR> Fat? <BR> Carbs? <BR> Whatever it is that you count, or spark. Do we really do it right? I am sure that most of us are off by a few calories daily. <BR> Sometimes I know for a fact I am off by 100, and some days I know that I am off by even more. <BR> Yesterday for example, I forgot to spark a sweet tea I had purchased in the supermarket and drank on the way home. <BR> Completely forgot about it. <BR> Today, I had a couple of spoonfuls of rice, and had forgot to spark it with ... Sun, 10 Aug 2014 21:33:53 EST sunday waiting for no news monday Another doctors appointment tomorrow. <BR> I had hoped to find out some answers about my foot tomorrow, but I was told that they dont read the results of the Nerve tests until after the 18th. <BR> So, here I figure I will go to my doctor tomorrow for my regular 3 month check up, blood pressure check, get my refills and then what? Go back again after the 18th so she can discuss my test results or, more than likely and this is what I expect to happen, get a phone call from her nurse, saying, "y... Sun, 10 Aug 2014 15:48:43 EST this moment When you realize that your life is spiraling out of control. Out of whose control??? Yours??? <BR> Are we ever in control of our own lives??? <BR> Arent bill collectors, doctors, parents, teachers, authority figures, children???? <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I dont know why this is on my mind this morning. Sitting here in the quietness of the house, working on the bills, finally a day alone, and its raining outside, so much so that I can... Fri, 8 Aug 2014 11:50:26 EST the from head to toe blog <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Normally I pay around 80 dollars to have my hair cut and colored. <BR> Money has been a little tight lately so, I decided to do my own color. <BR> Box colors dont work real well for me, as I have hard to color gray. sssshhhh, thats our little secret!!! <BR> However, I decided to take my chance, and I think it turned out pretty good. <BR> A l... Tue, 5 Aug 2014 20:37:52 EST the dread was warranted, but im glad its over, now answers. All I can say is, if you have never had EMG or NCV tests done. Hope you dont!! <BR> I hated it, I asked the tech if it was going to hurt and that b10tch lied!!! <BR> It hurt like a cowbite, no, make that 16 cows biting your in unison for like 30 minutes!!! <BR> If you have ever used a tens unit for pain, imagine turning it up on high and times that by at least 4. <BR> Some parts of it wasnt so bad, they did the muscle tests which I had imagined would be the worst but no the nerve conduction w... Mon, 4 Aug 2014 18:00:15 EST getting my ducks and piggies in a row I am still stuck in struggle mode. <BR> I wake up daily with the best intentions and for the most part I do pretty good, but I am finding myself back to late night snacking, mindless grazing. <BR> I havent gotten on the scale in about a week. I have no desire to do that right now either. <BR> But when I woke up this morning, I knew something had to change. <BR> I have only been to the walking track once in 6 weeks. Tomorrow is my appointment with the Neurologist so I am really hoping these t... Sun, 3 Aug 2014 12:04:09 EST miss indecisive made a decision!! alert the press!!! I did it!!! <BR> I ordered a pair of shoes. <BR> This might seem like a whats the big deal moment to some of you. <BR> But I am a very indecisive person. I have been doing some reading about it, and it seems it is a very real disorder associated with anxiety. <BR> I suppose for most, the choice to buy a pair of shoes is as simple as how they look, or how they fit, or even how much they cost. <BR> For me, it is will my orthotics fit in them easily, and still allow my feet room to not be squee... Thu, 31 Jul 2014 15:31:28 EST help, anyone, hello, Bueller? Bueller???? One thing I have discovered about myself, is that I am not a traditional girl. <BR> Or the stereotypical girl I guess is a better way of putting it. <BR> I despise shoe shopping!!! <BR> So, I am coming to you, spark friends for some much needed advice. <BR> Walking/Running shoes for the overpronator (flat foot)! <BR> Brooks was recommended to me by the people that fitted me for my orthotics. <BR> I understand that they sell this brand and therefore would recommend it, but is it a good shoe? <... Tue, 29 Jul 2014 20:19:26 EST 4 pounds gone. small victories can be huge!!! I know the last few blog posts have been somewhat dark, negative nancy. But I have just been dealing with inner demons that seem to show up in the form of over indulgence and they make me feel so bad about myself and the people around me. <BR> <BR> But today I can post a happy-ish blog. <BR> I got on the scale to discover a 4 pound weight loss. Now keep in mind, that I had gained 8 pounds the last time I got on the scale, after vacation. <BR> I was a little taken aback by the 4lb loss, I s... Mon, 28 Jul 2014 09:37:49 EST when do you give it all or not at all? can there be a middle? <img src="">When do you get really serious about your health? <BR> A man I know just died this morning, he was my age, 46. I have known him all his life, since we were little children. <BR> and he has always been overweight, obese, morbidly obese. <BR> I had suspected he had some kind of weight loss surgery in the last few years, as he had lost alot of weight, but he was still very obese. <BR> He had been in and out of the hospital for th... Sun, 27 Jul 2014 08:59:16 EST when its time to let go, let go, dont wait til your fingers bleed!!! Today I had intended to make cabbage rolls, but instead I ended up just throwing everything into the crcok pot and I ended up with a delicious soup. <BR> Cabbage, ground beef, tomatoes, carrots, mini bell peppers, of all colors, and rice. <BR> Garlic, oregano and ground red pepper. <BR> I dont know what its called, but it is tasty! <BR> In other news. I got my appointment for August 4th to have my nerve conduction study. <BR> Hopefully this will give me some idea of what is going on with my f... Fri, 25 Jul 2014 19:16:12 EST i talked myself into it, or did i I came to a conclusion this morning. I am a very very indecisive person. <BR> Making something as simple as a doctors appointment, or a hair appointment, for most people, takes as long as picking up the phone and making the call. <BR> But for me, it takes weeks of research, asking questions, and then picking up the phone and laying it back down at least half a dozen times. <BR> I sit here, one month into this problem with my foot and still havent made an appointment with a Neurologist. <BR> T... Thu, 24 Jul 2014 14:04:32 EST calling dr. good manners <img src=""> <BR> <BR> From the garden of my neighbor, who is 87 years old and still works his garden every year. <BR> So, today I am going to visit the local farmers market, hopefully to find some green beans and local honey. <BR> Also hoping they will have some fresh local berries. We picked blackberries in our yard til we got all the good ones, now they are just dried out. <BR> I woke up in an optimistic mood, despite that my shorts ... Tue, 22 Jul 2014 10:42:32 EST are you there foot, its me, valarie!!! Today I wanted to walk so bad, so I laced up my shoes and went to the track. <BR> For the first time in a month. <BR> <BR> After only 20 minutes, sadly I had to give up. <BR> My foot is so numb that all I could feel was my the numbness of my toes to go as a guide. <BR> Fearful of misstepping with my numb foot, but then I began to have some pains up in my bend of my knee. <BR> My leg is beginning to get numb as well up from my ankle. <BR> I am very worried now. <BR> It has been a month since ... Sun, 20 Jul 2014 23:31:54 EST my name is valarie and AM I an addict????? I am just so beyond ready to get back to healthy eating and eliminating the junk from my life and the toxins from my body. <BR> And I will not be tricked by my mind into believing I am hungry when I know I am full and I wont give in to cravings for that junk. <BR> It is a detox, they call it that for a reason, junk food is just as addictive as cigs and alcohol. <BR> I have been listening to this singer named Jason Isbell, and he sings alot about drug addiction and recovery from that and alcoh... Fri, 18 Jul 2014 10:14:01 EST theres a reason going down hill to the bottom is so easy Today I got on the scale for the first time in about 3 weeks and I have gained 8 pounds!!! <BR> I knew vacation I had let things go and since returning home I have found it very difficult to get back on track. <BR> I had assumed maybe I had gained 2 or 3 pounds, but EIGHT!!! <BR> So, all games end today and all the relunctance to cook and eat healthy and make better choices when deciding what to eat. <BR> It all has gotten out of hand and this isnt the first time and this wont be the last tim... Thu, 17 Jul 2014 20:25:38 EST the impatient patient The last few days have been pretty much playing catch up from vacation. <BR> Cleaning house, laundry, grocery shopping and two doctors appointments. <BR> Here is what is going on with my foot----the numbness set in around June 20th and hasnt let up, even on vacation, which meant for me not alot of sight seeing and walking. <BR> So upon my return home I went to see the orthopaedist who treated my broken foot last year. <BR> According to him and his xray, my broken bone has healed nicely and th... Wed, 16 Jul 2014 09:36:40 EST dog saga ends happily The story of the dog---my son took his dog with him camping a few weeks ago, and let him off his leash because they all went into the lake and the dog loves to swim. <BR> So, instead of putting the wet dog back into his car to drive back to the campsite, he allowed the dog to walk back with a group of friends he trusted. <BR> But they didnt put the dog back on the leash and the dog chased after my sons car and got out in the road. <BR> My son looked for the dog all that night and the next day... Tue, 15 Jul 2014 18:54:18 EST day after docs appointment I overslept, I got there on time, but one thing I hate is getting up late and not having time to sit around awhile first. <BR> Anyway, good news and not good but maybe not bad news too. <BR> First, the broken bone in my foot has healed. The doc said since he seen me a year ago, it is fully healed, and while there is some arthritis and bone spurs in my foot, he didnt see anything around the break that might be causing my numb foot. <BR> More than likely, it is tarsal tunnel syndrome, or a p... Mon, 14 Jul 2014 20:42:48 EST the night before doc appt Beach pics---only a few, as I am short on time tonight. <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I will try to add some more another blog. <BR> Tonight I am anticipating this long put off and long awaited for doctors appointment tomorrow to get some answers, or at least begin the process of getting some a... Sun, 13 Jul 2014 21:31:28 EST vacation is over!!! really really over!!! Home from vacation. Had a good time, but not as good as it could have been. <BR> First, injuries and pains and aches plagued me the whole time. <BR> On July 3rd, I injured my thumb. I hyperextended it and had to go to the ER. <BR> Xrays showed no break or dislocation, but they wrapped it up to my elbow, and that lasted all of about an hour. <BR> I went to Walmart and bought a thumb stabilizer, which I had to wear the whole time. <BR> I am just now beginning, a week later, to get some of the u... Sat, 12 Jul 2014 08:18:27 EST the numb foot, got my doo did, second blog of the day As some of you know by now, I have been having an issue with my foot for going on 2 weeks now. <BR> Today, while doing some research I happened across a condition called tarsal tunnel syndrome. <BR> Similar to Carpal tunnel of the hands. but this is in the feet. <BR> After reading, I came to the conclusion, without medical support mind you, that this is what is wrong with my foot and the cause for my numbness. <BR> One of the causes is an injury that doesnt heal right, such as I had with my b... Wed, 2 Jul 2014 19:08:13 EST bad good bad good I thought I had done poorly yesterday. I was feeling discouraged, but when I sat down and sparked all my food for the day, I found out I had eaten below my calorie level and still could have a snack, so I had a white chocolate strawberry yogurt and a cup of milk. <BR> I think the reason I am feeling so discouraged is because I havent been able to walk. I wake up daily with the best intentions, but the fear of worsening the condition of my foot keeps me home. <BR> Yesterday I walked a little ... Wed, 2 Jul 2014 09:07:53 EST its a twisty turny blog By now I had hoped to be celebrating a minor loss and be psyched for vacation. <BR> But I am not. <BR> I am not prepared, I need to start packing and organizing, I am a firm believer in making lists and so far, I havent even done that. <BR> Went shopping yesterday and just wasnt into it, couldnt think of anything I needed. <BR> My mind is in a fog and my body is in a funk!!! <BR> I had thought and hoped that the numbness in my foot was lessening. But I now think I am just getting used to it. ... Tue, 1 Jul 2014 08:21:27 EST i would dig my heel in, if i could feel it!! No matter what I do, I never feel like I am doing enough. <BR> Or, I never feel like I am doing the right thing. <BR> I have two good days then a bad day. the day after a bad day, I say ok, today is a new day, but is it really??? <BR> Can you really undo the damage of two bad days in four good days?? <BR> Other than making you feel better physically, but the emotional damage is still there. <BR> I had a conversation today with a young man, my sons age, who is a nurse, and a fine young man, ri... Sat, 28 Jun 2014 22:35:33 EST the long blog about changing my inheritance and destination A whole week without blogging!!! <BR> That was a little much needed break for me from sparking. It becomes overwhelming for me from time to time. <BR> Counting every bite and calorie. <BR> <BR> Well needless to say, my big 5 pound loss two weeks ago has probably been forgotten. <BR> I have been afraid to get back on the scale. <BR> Stress eating and snacking mostly. <BR> Spending the entire day at the hospital with my dad, trying to convince him to have the ct scan to try to find out what ... Fri, 27 Jun 2014 10:07:01 EST 16 days til sand between my toes I have been watiing til late night to blog. But today I decided to go for it early, maybe it will help me to stay motivated. <BR> I havent walked now for 2 days and I am really beating myself up about it. <BR> I knew rain was coming last night and today so why I didnt walk yesterday morning, was the threat of rain. <BR> Let me explain a little. Rain does not bother me, I dont mind rain and wouldnt even mind walking in a light drizzle. But the track where I walk, for some reason, is slippery ... Fri, 20 Jun 2014 09:02:37 EST short and no sweets To begin, just get it over with. I went over my calories today. <BR> But I didnt eat any junk. I just had finished my food for the day, then I wasnt finished, so I had more food and sent me over by 300 calories. <BR> I could make excuses and say I did this or that, but truth is, I was just straight up hungry. <BR> I wondered earlier in the day if it might be my supplements making me hungry. I was fine before I took them, then I got really hungry. <BR> Anyone else have this??? <BR> I took iron... Thu, 19 Jun 2014 21:21:45 EST its always clearer in the light of day Ok, three quick things before I get onto the blog. <BR> 1. I need new music for my playlists for when I walk. I am not really so much into the poppy stuff that gets air time, so if anyone has any suggestions for some good upbeat music please let me know. <BR> 2. I am quickly approaching my points limit and wondering what happens once you reach the top??? I suppose I will reset my whole program, and will let everyone know if I make a new account. <BR> 3. I finally solved the mystery as to why ... Wed, 18 Jun 2014 22:31:59 EST should i weigh or should i wait I was feeling ok today, but things havent been that great, I cracked the acrylic on my tanning bed, which I have only had 3 months to the day today. <BR> It is going to cost nearly 300 to replace and I just do not have it right now. <BR> I suppose I could risk using it with the crack, but I dont feel safe doing that. <BR> I was feeling good just before getting in. <BR> Now I just feel like a fat failure. <BR> <BR> I had planned to weigh in tomorrow. After reading a Spark article warning abo... Tue, 17 Jun 2014 20:16:45 EST nine I decided, since my son borrowed my pedometer, to start counting my laps on the track. But I can never keep counting, after about 3 or 4 laps I lose count. <BR> I usually walk one hour no matter how many laps that is. But today I think I walked 13 laps in an hour, maybe it was 12. I know it was somewhere right in that neighborhood. <BR> Then once I had finished the hour, I walked around the park to the steep cemetery road and I went down the hill on the other side and back. <BR> Adding an ex... Mon, 16 Jun 2014 21:48:44 EST day 8, not bad but not great The weekend was so so. <BR> I did pretty well thru the day yesterday, had a nice salad for lunch. <BR> Snacked a little too much last night, but it was yogurt and jello. Today was so so as well, I decided to skip my walk because my feet were hurting last night, I soaked them in epsom salt and this morning they were very sore. <BR> Think maybe I had overdone it on the track, and maybe its the shoes. <BR> I am going to stay on track this whole week and walk when and if I can. <BR> Overall, I wo... Sun, 15 Jun 2014 23:38:31 EST day 6, hang onto your head!!! One thing I still dont understand is the sudden change in my calcium. It is ranging upwards of 450 and I know that makes no sense, when months ago I would spark the same food and it would be around 120 or so. <BR> Even drinking 3 cups of milk a day its still higher than ever. <BR> Oh well, who knows. <BR> Day 6 started out pretty good, got a late start on the walking track, but walked an hour regardless, was feeling pretty good, but today has been the highest in calories, I went over by a cou... Fri, 13 Jun 2014 22:15:48 EST day 5, the rainy day. Day 5. <BR> The rainy day. I knew when I awoke there was no chance of walking, so I rolled over and listened to the rain and fell back to sleep for yet another hour. <BR> It actually felt kind of nice to sleep. It rained and stormed here all day, and I wasnt out of the house all day. <BR> I did pretty much nothing, but watch Netflix, and do a load of laundry, lay in the tanning bed and watch more Netflix. <BR> Then I cooked soft chicken tacos for supper, I added some spinach and lettuce and... Thu, 12 Jun 2014 20:35:31 EST countdown day 4, why am i beating myself up? This day has been an up and down kind of day. <BR> First, I did go walk this morning. But I was so slow, tight, sore, achy and was just dragging. <BR> But I got my hour in and started out doing really well. <BR> I came home and for the first time in awhile I got on the scale and according to mr. scale, I have lost 5 pounds. <BR> I was jumping for joy. <BR> I just felt so good, I dont want to jinx it, I dont want to plan ahead and say next week I will...... <BR> I just want to savor the day a... Wed, 11 Jun 2014 20:21:16 EST day three, not that awful. So, day three. <BR> Success or semi-fail?? <BR> Ok, the weather man reported last night that would probably see rain early today. So, I slept a little later than usual. It was my own poor decision number 1--sitting up late watching Netflix. <BR> and number 2---not going to the walking track early this morning. <BR> I waited all day for the rain, of course it never came and as the evening wore on, it got hot. <BR> Around an hour ago, the skies turned black and the rain poured down. <BR> But I ... Tue, 10 Jun 2014 21:04:24 EST