SNOWANGELDIVA's SparkPeople Blog SNOWANGELDIVA's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community No Nekkin'! <img src=""> <BR> I'm sure everyone has that person in their life that their words of critism crippled their ego. <BR> I've been insecure about my legs since 17. <BR> Puberty hit and I got curves. <BR> I went from thin to this random mass of odd lumps and bumps. <BR> I felt gross and ashamed when my body morphed from girl to woman. It was validated by an ex's comment when I first sat in his passenger seat and the disgust in his voice wh... Sun, 25 May 2014 22:37:39 EST Teenie tiny blog Friday Night (last week), I was on gym duty with the 8-18 y.o. and my daughter and I picked up some hoops when the crowds died down. That night is a weekly escape from loneliness - not just for the kids. <BR> <BR> The pastor encouraged us to make it a weekly lesson and teasingly as what our deal was with these circles? <BR> I told him a circle reminds me of God's love ~ no ending can be found. <BR> <BR> I dance with despair frequently. It's part of Depression. I am shamefully critical of my... Sat, 19 Apr 2014 00:49:06 EST Geriatric Hair It's my hair or my body, but, I have yet to channel that negative energy wisely. I just find that I'm on autopilot and I don't clue in until the bleach has made my hair a rainbow of banana peel yellow, melted white and jello orange. That's when I remember to pray. <BR> *face palm* <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I am cruel to my hair. <BR> <img src=""> <BR> It's not like I have some nas... Thu, 10 Apr 2014 23:49:54 EST Reward Dress I bought a Reward Dress!!! <BR> <BR> I have been pondering on an inexpensive way to encourage (bribe) myself to remain motivated. I am so indecisive that it was a miraculous feat in more ways than one. <BR> <BR> It was $12 @ Walmart and I am positively in love. It was one of those times where I was running around doing a bazillion errands and as I walked by it time went in ...s...l...o...w... motion. I stopped mid stride and oogled it. Stroked it. Convinced myself that if I was to die today... Tue, 8 Apr 2014 20:56:08 EST Stop being selfish - choose healthy <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I ate my fridge and my scale squealed on me. My jeans all shrunk, same with my shirt, bra and skivvies. I thought that my clothes shrinking would bother me, but, it's looking like Spring in Ontario (7 robins spotted on my 5k walk this morning ~ the first of 2014!!!) and I'm looking for a ynew wardrobe FILLED with pastels. So what if it's a size 12 instead of 10? <BR> Big deal. <BR> Hubby keeps feeding me. It's his... Mon, 7 Apr 2014 11:34:08 EST Hair today gone tomorrow Combo of "Fun" and "What works for me", because it's fun to make vlogs where I banter about stuff that works for me. <BR> Vlogs are my logs in video form. Sometimes they're closer to a journal, but, that's also "What works for me." This is not edited. I am not adding music or cricket sound effects when I have a moment of distraction. <BR> Not today. <BR> Cherish something about yourself and you're less likely to give up on the whole package. My hair and my eyes I give my attention to. Some pe... Thu, 16 Jan 2014 18:49:29 EST Why is Moderation a bad word? Happy New Year, SparkWorld! <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I’ve had a second car accident in a year. My car choked to death on the guardrails I fed it when I was trying to brake for those kind people that neglect their signals lights, on an ice covered road. God Bless, Dipsticks. <BR> <BR> (Whomever loves winter driving, raise your hand – and smack yourself silly.) <BR> <BR> This time we can not recover financially from the accident. It w... Sun, 5 Jan 2014 00:26:11 EST Rinse Repeat Building mojo <BR> link><BR>ss_articles.asp?id=271 </link> Fri, 29 Nov 2013 22:19:32 EST Like a Circle First, 5 a.m., you suck. <BR> Second, I miss Sparkworld. <BR> I let fear swallow me. It just snuck up on me out of nowhere. A couple of times it caught me off guard. When I thought it wasn't looking I tried to slowly sneak away from it. My cloaking device acted more like a beacon and I just got scorfed up. Just like that bird that built it's nest on our chimney. Outta nowhere it fell into the darkness of my unlit woodstove until it was freed in the morning; closely resembling that of a bat o... Tue, 1 Oct 2013 05:40:02 EST Almost tomorrow... I'd vlog but, I'm wearing the same outfit I wore last week. <BR> My uniform. <BR> v/blog is my diversion from gnawing the handle off of my fridge from stress hunger. <BR> Is there such a thing as 'Stress Hunger'? <BR> There is now. <BR> <BR> So, I popped two pieces of teeth whitening gum in my mouth; for three reasons: <BR> <BR> A. any more than three I get flatulence that would get me an eviction from our house. Being that gender that dominates my home is male and the majority of them sti... Fri, 23 Aug 2013 23:18:28 EST 30,000"ish" Step Challenge It's the One Week Anniversary of the 30,000 step challenge. <BR> <BR> I was curious how much I now walk a day compared to when I began SparkPeople in 2010, so, I took up MOSTMOM1 on her challenge. <BR> <BR> 2010: 1,000/Day vs. 2013: 21,000/Day <BR> <em>252</em> <BR> <BR> Fri, 16 Aug 2013 21:07:54 EST Distraction in action " " Mon, 8 Jul 2013 22:34:07 EST Jill, remind me... ...and this is as good as she gets. <BR> <BR> My editor quit. <BR> <BR> OH! The ONLY photo mu man got of my daughter and I at her 8th grade grad. <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> Tue, 2 Jul 2013 23:03:52 EST Maintaining Chaos like herding kittens; entertaining and nerve wracking. <BR> Few can enter, even fewer can stay. <BR> <BR> I am wired for chaos. It’s also known as Crazy Lady Syndrome to the elite online self-diagnostic types. <BR> <BR> I am so tired of wasting time fruitlessly trying to straighten out my life just so that the ‘theys’ the world over will have an easier time trying to package me in cotton and stuff me in the closet to keep me (and their house) safe. I am done being the bull in th... Wed, 12 Jun 2013 23:23:21 EST RaNdOm coffee just random... <BR> unedited... <BR> blah blah blah... <BR> <BR> Virginia Creeper...the loin cloth for my house. <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Florida Georgia Line & Nelly ~ Cruise <BR> <link> </link> <BR> <BR> Demi Lovato ~ Heart Attack <BR> <link> </link> <BR> <BR> & JB ~ That Power <BR> <link> </link> <BR> ... Tue, 4 Jun 2013 19:48:49 EST Not Alone <img src=""> <BR> It's no wonder they thought Gigantor was initially fine. This is him before the emergency inflation of his left lung. <BR> <BR> I have 15 seconds to update, do my verbal diarrhea to get all this confusion and darkness that's trying to take over my cranium out and get my focus back. <BR> <BR> [F.Y.I. 5 kids is work.] <BR> <BR> I'm in hermit mode. It's been 2 months...or a year and 2 months to be brutally transparent. ... Tue, 21 May 2013 20:17:59 EST Thigh DeodoRANT My motivation to keep going is the ability to hug my knees. Once I was happy just seeing my knees let alone being able to hug them. <BR> <BR> Ugh. I remember when my thighs would neck uncontrollably and I would end up with a fiery rash on my thighs (that is not how I want my girl zone set on fire). I used deodorant and baby powder to reduce the friction. It didn’t matter that suits came in my size, I couldn’t trust my thighs to leave each other alone. <BR> <BR> I battle the 'Blues' and go t... Thu, 18 Apr 2013 07:51:33 EST Ten Minutes Tue, 16 Apr 2013 10:42:09 EST StarDate blahblah blah Good Morning, SparkFamily! <BR> <BR> I'm having difficulty uploading videos. I'm convinced Spock (ubergeek hubby) and Gigantor (manboy) have done something nefarious to my computer which is inhibiting my uploading marathon. I have vlogged everyday some nonsensical, distracting banter of warm fuzzies and I can't upload. <BR> <BR> [HOLY HEAVEN is that a frog?! It's like barely morning froggie dude. SHUDDAP! How did he not freeze in the Ice Storm? How is it that I was wearing a parka on Tuesda... Tue, 16 Apr 2013 06:10:26 EST We threw out the Third Wheel from our bed. <img src=""> <BR> (Beds I make at work) <BR> <BR> It's hour #2 and I'm counting shadows on the wall. The sleep aid that the pharmacist seemed all paranoid about I am convinced a placebo. It sure wasn't a skittle or a tic tac! Then, from the quiet dark, I hear a sigh from my hubby's side of the bed and I can't help but grin. His next move is his cocoon manuever. He begins a steam roller move to edge of the bed and the blankets follow thei... Fri, 12 Apr 2013 06:17:57 EST Banana Split Instead of eating one I grabbed my hoop and chucked on some tunes. I'm feeling like quite the country gal after the CMA's (yes, that does mean I'm swapping stilettos for red cowboy boots this summer), hence the variation from my usual Trance Dance stuff. <BR> I'm a visual learner. I am accepting it. I also clued in I am not the only one. I NEED to SEE how healthy people live, eat, play and battle demons. Not reality t.v. drama. Life is too stressful, I don't need to see that scripted or unscr... Mon, 8 Apr 2013 23:32:11 EST Dance Party Friday Dedicated to: <BR> <img src=""> <BR> "I really miss your dancing skills being broadcast, just saying :) <BR> I remember u distinctly saying that its what helped you to lose a lot of weight. <BR> Oh maybe some day I can see Liz dancing again - OOOOO may I suggest a little tom cruise sliding across the floor, maybe with some pink hair :D ..." <BR> <BR> <BR> ROGUE_RUNNER began them as part of her challenges with the Vlogger Team. I loved ... Thu, 14 Mar 2013 22:49:17 EST Not My Fault Ugh. <BR> I’m playing ‘Chicken’ with my appetite and it’s only ending up in physical, emotional and mental disaster. <BR> It all started when hubs took over cooking and that boy can cook. <BR> So, to show him my appreciation (and secretly hope he feels so valuable that he’ll take over the cooking until my dying day), I make sure I eat. I do. I eat everything to the power of 3 and that equals weight gain and feeling like crap. <BR> <BR> Does he pour it down my throat? <BR> No. <BR> Does he gu... Thu, 28 Feb 2013 19:53:59 EST You Grow Girl. “I’m tough, Captain. I am. I really am.” I insist to my boss (she’s ‘Captain’ since telling me she’s not old enough to be a “Ma’am”), I say it as tears of pain are streaming down my cheeks. Her usual sexy, raspy voice turned almost melodic when she comforted me with, “I know, but, it’s okay to not be tough all the time. Take some time to heal and call me. I can make sure you get your hours and some time to recuperate.” <BR> <BR> Then I was driven home to sleep, cry and growl my way through a... Tue, 26 Feb 2013 20:03:26 EST Swim Like Nemo You know when you dip your foot into the Lake and that quick little dip sends these siren-like screams yelling, "Holy crap are you freakin' kidding me. Your youngin's so lied about the temp!"? <BR> <BR> You already knew that. You are their mother after all. <BR> <BR> What to do? What to do? What to do? <BR> <BR> I think revenge is perfect. I know it's a dish best served cold and better if not at all, but, we can't end our story here. No. <BR> <BR> Girlfriend your girlzone will climb up an... Mon, 25 Feb 2013 07:30:11 EST Rapid Fire He’s clearing his throat again. <BR> <BR> The dude needs a smackdown. Blind much? <BR> My hands are full. I’m stressed to the hilt. If I stop to pay attention to you, do you not realize that all the cr@p I’m juggling is going to fall?! <BR> <BR> [Polite’ish’ throat clearing and that quizzical eyebrow thing.] <BR> <BR> I’m pi$$ed at Mr. Pompous now. He knows how to make my life easier and instead just stands there - mocking me. <BR> <BR> Dude, you’re a d!ck. <BR> <BR> Just sayin’. I’m c... Tue, 12 Feb 2013 05:10:24 EST An Adventure Today is Weigh-In for Week 4 "Future's So Bright" Team and I'm doing my insomniac thing with this week's temp flip from -30C to the +10C expected today. I left for work yesterday morning in a blizzard with school bus cancellations and icy roads and this morning the feet of snow that have been accumulating may be a closer resemblance to a puddle than an igloo by days ends. Ontario's weather is an adventure and how it ties in with my health journey is that I am very influenced by my environment... Tue, 29 Jan 2013 03:53:59 EST H8Rs gonna H8 [Hula Girl ~] <BR> <BR> H8Rs gonna H8 <BR> Don't slap them. That's illegal. <BR> Don't stoop to their sabotaging, undermining, green-eyed monster ways. Keep choosing to enjoy your life. <BR> <BR> Kill 'em with kindness. <BR> <BR> I used to be devasted when a jealous person would try to steal any joy I had with my life. It was usuallybecause my enjoyment exposed their misery and instead of claiming their own joy they tried to snuff mine. It was a more familiar maneuver and less w... Sun, 27 Jan 2013 19:39:26 EST Accountability 9 <link><BR> </link> <BR> <BR> I was feeling guilty clogging up Spark with banter. I'm saving it for impromptu Dance Parties instead. I doubt you'll ever get anything but nonsense from this chick. <BR> <BR> Water ~ Oops working on it <BR> Intake ~ oops 1.89 for some nasty blizzard icecream (I think was incecream?) put me at the tippy top, but, I'm doin' good (I love gum) <BR> Fitness ~ L-A-Z-Y today. It's my day off. I get one lazy day. ... Tue, 22 Jan 2013 16:45:46 EST Accountability Day 8 <img src="">I took my Dodge Caravan off-roading yesterday. Apparently it's not an off-roading vehicle. I bet if we weren't in Canada in the dead of winter it could be... <BR> <BR> Footage of results can be viewed at... <BR> <link><BR>video_id=9ZHf2hEosIU </link> <BR> <BR> Day 8 accountability. <BR> <BR> How I am losing weight is an absolute enigma to me. I'm BARELY staying in range, chewing gum l... Mon, 21 Jan 2013 19:59:38 EST Maid Wisdom Today I went and played maid at the resort. I love the serenity of working by myself and turning an icky space into a fabulous one. It reminds me of my journey. <BR> <BR> I take steps when I enter into a room: <BR> <BR> 1. I chose to be here. I remind myself that this job pays to feed my giant children. <BR> Just like being at have a reason to do this work. <BR> I forgot mine with exhaustion and personal drama. Personal demons fight back and sometimes they win the battle. The ke... Sat, 19 Jan 2013 20:10:18 EST One Word Answer LYNN and JULIA satrted it... <BR> <BR> " Not as easy as you might think! Copy and Paste into your own blog, change the answers to suit you. It's really hard to only use ONE WORD answers." <BR> <BR> Where is your cell phone? <BR> D@mn?! <BR> <BR> Spouse? <BR> Angel <BR> <BR> Your hair? <BR> *R*O*C*K*S*T*A*R* <BR> <BR> Your mother? <BR> Nag <BR> <BR> Your father? <BR> Jolly <BR> <BR> Your favorite thing? <BR> Smiles <BR> <BR> Your dream last night? <BR> Nightmare <BR> <BR> Favorite dri... Sat, 19 Jan 2013 18:50:02 EST Accountability 2,3,4,5 and 6. ya. Day 6... <BR> <BR> Food: Trail Mix. Nuff said. <BR> Water: Boo-yah! <BR> Fitness: Rockstar <BR> Attitude: At really high altitude. <BR> <BR> I miss my Hunny. I get to see him in 1 hr and a half. <BR> <BR> EDIT: <BR> Ahem, to clarify my husband doesn't say those nasty things, those were my inner demons projecting. Fri, 18 Jan 2013 22:05:41 EST Accountability Day #1 I <em>26</em> you Nan and Emily for sharing yours. It helps me remember perspective. <BR> <BR> My Daily Goals: <BR> <BR> <em>4</em> Calories 2, 260 - 2, 610 <BR> I burn a minimum of 11, 000 a week now. <BR> <BR> Spark has mentioned that they do not recommend that. They have a cap on your cardio/day. So, I kinda realize that I have officially gone from sedentary to holy-cow-active. <BR> <BR> My intake used to be 1250 - 1500 so this range my belly doesn't like. It's DOUBLE! <BR> <BR... Sun, 13 Jan 2013 19:54:13 EST Food Skank Quick note to say, "Hi, I'm not dead! I have not dropped off the face of the earth OR been abducted by green dudes (bummer on the last, cuz, I'm curious)" <BR> <BR> So, I'm ridiculously sleep deprived and Sleep Deprivation makes me a skank. Any food that walks through my door I just smile and open wide. <BR> <BR> Nasty. I know, I know, but, oh-so-frikkin' true! <BR> <BR> I'm justifying my indiscretions and realize I'm doing semi-tallies on my caloric consumption. <BR> <BR> It kinda goes l... Fri, 11 Jan 2013 22:00:08 EST Spin Me! is my gym. <BR> Tubing! Tue, 8 Jan 2013 19:33:39 EST All Good Things... I'm in the midst of getting my kids motivated for school and my youngest was asking about my friends from waaay back when I used a wagon to get to school and then she asked, "Why?" as in why were they my friends and it reminded me of the letter that was emailed the world over that encouraged people to be encouragers. <BR> <BR> So, in this spirit, SparkFriends, drop me a line. Your positive words strengthen me in my personal battles. <BR> <BR> I will return the sentiment. <BR> <BR> The in... Mon, 7 Jan 2013 07:56:39 EST All in Due Time "One week into the New Year and a Monday, could it get any more cr@ppy? I had this plan -see; it was going have me a supermodel by summer and claiming the Nobel Peace Prize by whenever they hand out that thing." <BR> <BR> I am so done with setting myself up with too much. <BR> <BR> I'm back in the workforce. It was a few solid weeks of busting my arse until my hands were burning from exhaustion. I had entered into Chambermaid Purgatory by getting hired during the Resort's busiest time of ye... Mon, 7 Jan 2013 05:18:17 EST I am a ninja. <img src=""> <BR> It's the 2nd of January, this is my "500 Fitness Minutes" trophy from SparkPeople for January. I know work will slow down when the kids stop it with the vacationing and go back to school, but, this *R*O*C*K*S*!* <BR> <BR> Woo to my hoo! <BR> Remember last year how I was struggling to go for a 2 kilometer walk - once a week ?! <BR> <BR> I went from confined to my bed 2 days a week to being a ninja. <BR> <BR> Happy Da... Wed, 2 Jan 2013 18:28:29 EST The Future's so Bright... <img src=""> <BR> <link><BR>ndividual.asp?gid=58843 </link> <BR> <BR> I successfully went from obese to healthy with SparkPeople. I daily chose to work hard towards healthy. I'm going to let go of the 5-10lbs that I've been maintaining to settle in the middle of my B.M.I. <BR> This is Part One of Two Challenges that I'll be doing. <BR> <BR> My focus is: <BR> Water (8-10) <BR> Portions <BR> Equippi... Tue, 1 Jan 2013 08:56:52 EST Week 52 On my SparkPage I wrote a little blip for each week of my journey to healthy. I don't know how many times in the year since I've repeated, Week 52. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I keep that Weight Log there to remind myself how it's done; One Day at a Time CHOOSING to care about my being. <BR> <BR> One of the things that helped me was purging my home of my enemy. They're allowed supervised visits, but, for the most part they've bee... Sun, 30 Dec 2012 07:07:15 EST 28.12.12. Bwahaha...too lazy to type. Fri, 28 Dec 2012 22:13:15 EST 27.12.12. LAG1212 you gave me shovel and it snowed. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> CROCHETMOMDIVA, we'll just make a snowman with it. <BR> <BR> I'm on Day 6 until I get a day off. I plan on using the passes that my employer has given to our family and do some serious snow tubing. This winter (if I survive this insanely physical job) I am planning on learning to Snow Board. <BR> <BR> I need my wallet to catch up with my techy needs. That way I... Thu, 27 Dec 2012 07:56:37 EST Apparently I`m on the Obligatory Diet. Surprises suck. <BR> <BR> I can't prepare for the unexpected. <BR> I don't roll with the punches. I'm like a cow with surprises. I chew on it, swallow and regurgitate it. <BR> <BR> It's painful and gross to watch. I hate seeing people feel uncomfortable, but, I need time to make decisions. I find I try to spare people by rushing the decision. When I rush a decision I just pull my decisions out of thin air. Oddly enough they`re rarely the right one. <BR> <BR> I had a surprise visitor show... Fri, 21 Dec 2012 17:57:45 EST Speaker Magnet Holy AWKWARD, Batman! <BR> Today was Orientation, yes, AFTER I've already been working there. That's cool, that's cool. It's a compliment to me that I was The First on-the-spot hire my boss has ever done and they are so very confident that I won't get lost or lose their customers. <BR> <BR> ever. <BR> <BR> No pressure. Nah, We all know I can handle pressure. <BR> <em>40</em> <BR> <BR> I have discovered it is "I" that instigates AWKWARD. I just naturally flag the fruitin' thing down to ... Thu, 20 Dec 2012 16:59:21 EST Nekkin' Thighs It may be the sunshine, but, I feel free. <BR> <BR> Knowing it and feeling it are two different states of being. <BR> <BR> You know that saying, "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels"? Who ever thought that up couldn't cook and didn't have anyone who would cook for them without having an aneurism. <BR> I guess if my options were charcoal and skinny, then, ya. However, if it's been 18 years of perfecting your favourite delicacies then it's a resounding, "HELL NO!" <BR> <BR> Feed. Me. <BR>... Wed, 19 Dec 2012 14:45:53 EST Just Enjoy the Show <img src=""> <BR> <BR> The wounds of a friend...blah, blah, blah...healthy psychology...blah. <BR> <BR> So, I'm going to get in the middle of my BMI. I'm done toying with it. It's like one of those STUPIDO brain teaser toys that I would chuck across a room in frustration or, OR that annoying Rubik Cube that I get 98 percent of the stupid thing figured out and then I just start yanking off stickers. Don't you shake your head at me. I'v... Tue, 18 Dec 2012 19:40:02 EST Superwoman seen through the Lenses of Love <img src=""> <BR> <BR> “You’re my idol.” <BR> ? <BR> <BR> (a.k.a. - me speechless) <BR> I shook the phone like a wii remote...d@mn glitchy thing. Maybe the battery is dying, cuz, <BR> <BR> ?! <BR> <BR> “You’re always so bubbly, energetic and such a go-getter...” <BR> Pregnant pause then a pleading... <BR> “What’s your secret?” <BR> <BR> {All said in a thick, feminine British Accent. God Bless accents.] <BR> <BR> I have no idea wh... Mon, 17 Dec 2012 21:55:59 EST I love my job The one I don't get paid for and this Chambermaid one. <BR> <BR> I was told that a lot of ladies bail before the first day is through because it's so physically demanding. <BR> <BR> Thank God, I've dropped 60+lbs. I was able to keep up and then some. <BR> <BR> I really enjoy doing my work and getting paid for it. At home I'm the Maid, but, not paid or with space respect. No one is under my feet destroying my work at the Resort. <BR> <BR> So far, so awesome. <BR> Off to spend time with th... Sun, 16 Dec 2012 18:32:52 EST Thank you for the support! <img src=""> <BR> I got the job as a maid at the Ski Resort! Hence the pretty little picture above. I'm a SnowBunnyMaid, but, this is not my uniform. I will however, pretend it is and make the scrubs and sneakers seem attractive. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> I've been a Homemaker for 15 years and my job is the best job in the entire world. <BR> <BR> Throw motherhood on top of it and... Wed, 12 Dec 2012 18:56:26 EST