ROSEPETAL80's SparkPeople Blog ROSEPETAL80's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Everything is going to be alright Yesterday I found out that a friend of mine was thrown a massive (but wonderful) curveball. While I know she is deep down thrilled about it, I also know that she must be a little scared. She and her husband are planners, they knew how they wanted to do things in their life and when, so I'm sure they have very mixed emotions right now. <BR> <BR> It made me think about how I handle the curveballs in my life. Both small and large ones come up all the time. Do I just roll with it, or do I freak ... Wed, 17 Jun 2015 05:53:36 EST Everybody Talks Today's mini rant is about how I need to handle criticism and comments people make. <BR> <BR> I have a tendency to take other people's remarks personally. If a certain person in my life feels it's necessary to instruct me on every little thing (even things I already know), then it's not because they think I'm stupid or incapable. Just because there are people in our lives that always have something to say or remarks to make that are less than flattering, does not mean that they are out to hu... Tue, 16 Jun 2015 05:51:20 EST Revised my achievements I decided I wanted to revise my page a little and removed my old achievements. I had lost at least 25 a couple of years ago before gaining it all back and then some. <BR> <BR> I am NOT belittling what I did before and I'm certainly not going to beat myself up over gaining it back. But I AM going to push myself to do better this time around. Mon, 15 Jun 2015 12:27:45 EST Old too big clothes I'm keeping one set of my nicest too big clothes from my biggest size. The rest I'm donating as I replace them. <BR> <BR> I love that some of the clothes I couldn't wear a couple months ago are starting to fit. Sun, 17 Nov 2013 09:08:08 EST Distract the Binge Monster List Today's blog assignment: distract the Binge Monster, make a list of things to do that will keep me from giving in. <BR> <BR> 1. Crafts. I love to cross stitch but I really haven't been doing it at all lately. I have a ton of projects I'd like to do that I haven't even started. <BR> <BR> 2. Heavy Duty housecleaning. Holidays are coming, I feel like I need to make the apartment sparkle. Plus, I have no desire to eat with the smell of heavy cleaners in the air. <BR> <BR> 3. Spark. Hop ... Fri, 15 Nov 2013 05:31:15 EST 5 reasons to get my workout in So my "blog assignment" today was 5 reasons to workout. <BR> <BR> 1. To lose weight. My biggest reason to be here really. <BR> <BR> 2. I feel good when I do. After I've exercised, I feel really good the rest of the day. <BR> <BR> 3. To get healthy. Weight issues considered, skinny people have health problems too that can be helped with exercise. <BR> <BR> 4. Me time. I have a 3 year old daughter and a 37 year old husband, I need me time. I read, check my emails and spark while I'm... Thu, 14 Nov 2013 05:56:54 EST One day at a time When they say one day, one meal, one workout at a time they weren't kidding. When I get up in the morning, I think to myself "just get up and go". When I get to the gym I read and I don't watch the clock, before I know what my workout is done and I'm on my way home to start the rest of my day. And so far it's working wonderfully. I feel so much better going to work knowing that my workout is done. Wed, 13 Nov 2013 07:09:07 EST morning workouts day 2 So the ladies I work with think I'm insane for getting up at 3:30 am to go to the gym but I'm loving it. I feel more accomplished. It's done in time to get home before my husband gets up to get ready for work. Tue, 12 Nov 2013 19:39:54 EST Really? I found a picture from when I was in my high school band during the Memorial Day parade. I wasn't anywhere near as heavy as I thought i was. Why did I allow the other kids to make me feel like I was so huge? I spent my whole life feeling like then becoming the "fat girl". For nothing! I wasn't fat then, but I am now. Self fulfilling prophecy. I became what others made me believe I was. Mon, 11 Nov 2013 07:46:09 EST PMS and the Binge Monster So far so good. I feel better, and not as bloated as I felt last week. I think a HUGE part of last week was hormonal. It was that time of the month and I couldn't stop eating. Why is it that as soon as my PMS hits the Binge Monster starts knocking? <BR> <BR> Granted, while the Binge Monster was calling, there was a tiny voice of reason that stopped me sooner than it would have in the past. I'm not saying that I did well by far last week. If I did well, I wouldn't have gained. But, the little... Thu, 7 Nov 2013 05:51:41 EST Recovery plan So I set some new goals/mini goals to work towards over the next 6 months. <BR> <BR> I've also decided to avoid the scale until Monday to give myself some time to burn off some of the weight I'm sure I gained. (new pants size still fits but is snugger than it was a couple weeks ago. Still not uncomfortable so I might not be in terrible shape.) <BR> <BR> The gym will be minimum 3 days a week and I'm making a point to get in my walk during break. At work I'm also changing my work habits so I'... Wed, 6 Nov 2013 06:08:17 EST embarrased, ashamed I'm afraid to step on the scale. I've been bad lately with my food. I know I didn't gain everything I lost but I can feel that I gained back some. Making a point to get back in the swing of things. With the holidays here, there's not a lot of wiggle room for slacking off. I think I need a little support. Mon, 4 Nov 2013 20:57:07 EST missed the gym Last night my daughter had a horrible tempter tantrum about going to bed. By the time it was all over with, it was too late for me to make it to the gym. Well, we all have days like that. I'll be making it up tonight. She's usually so good about bed time. Tue, 15 Oct 2013 05:43:47 EST For the Glee fans I generally ignore a lot of the news, gossip, celebrity reports etc. I however just watched the tribute episode of Glee and cried my eyes out. They did it very tastefully. I had read that they planned the death of Corey's character to be drug related. I wasn't sure how I felt about it. But the episode didn't mention how he died. It was simply all the other characters grieving. As sad and depressing the whole episode was, it was good to see how well they handled it. <BR> <BR> I realize that ... Sat, 12 Oct 2013 06:12:39 EST Not quite at 30lbs and not so satis-fries Before I start, I want to be perfectly clear, I am not beating myself up and I am proud of how far I've come, I'm just laughing at myself a little. I step on the scale and my total weight loss is now 29.6 lbs....why? Why not that extra 1/2 a lb? How rude of the scale to deny me my 30lbs loss marker for one more week. <em>225</em> <em>334</em> <BR> <BR> The other day my aunt who is also a heavy woman (who absolutely carries her weight a lot differently than I do. I carry my weight in ... Fri, 11 Oct 2013 05:44:17 EST overweight dachshund loses 50 lbs!!! Had to share this! Amazing. Poor thing was way too heavy but is healthy now! <BR> <BR> <BR><BR>ses-50-pounds-in-viral-photos <BR> <BR> <em>338</em> Wed, 9 Oct 2013 20:26:44 EST Motivated by my tracker! Took a walk last night to light up my tracker since I wasn't going to the gym. Should have walked another 2 minutes. When I got home I was short about 100 or so steps of the goal LOL. So I paced around the kitchen grabbing my evening snack and such. Wound up short 4 steps. Obviously I quickly fixed that before bed. <BR> <BR> I can definitely say the tracked is motivating me. I'm taking longer walks during work just to try to get it to count as a workout. If I don't have an errand to run dur... Wed, 9 Oct 2013 06:16:41 EST One Handed Blog Can't wait to see the typos on this one. My daughter woke up early and is cuddling with me while I 'spark'. Her thing is holding my thumb and feeling my nail. I think it's a comfort thing. <BR> <BR> Since the cold is still in my head and not my chest, I went to the gym last night. I tried the bike because I wanted to read during my workout. I didn't sweat as much but my activity tracker said I burned more calories. I'm not sure if I believe it but the next time I use the bike, I'll increase ... Tue, 8 Oct 2013 06:20:38 EST Clarification and a sick day I was definitely feeling my cold yesterday. I got up early to get ready for the gym then fell fast asleep on the couch. I decided to take the day and try to rest up a little and try to get better. <BR> <BR> As far as the donut thing from the other day. I got some less than constructive feedback so I wanted to clarify something. I am absolutely not encouraging to eat a donut everyday. What I believe is that there is room in our lives for all the 'treat' foods within reason. I'm trying to inco... Mon, 7 Oct 2013 06:20:35 EST All calories are not the same Today should be a busy day and I'm looking forward to checking out how it went on my activity tracker. I have to say that I'm so glad I splurged and got this for myself. Even my daughter likes tapping it to make it light up. I'm already finding myself trying to sneak in extra steps here and there just to get more lights to glow. I've been making a point to take longer work walks at break just to see if it I can get it to count as a workout. Of course, I need to take advantage of all this befo... Sat, 5 Oct 2013 06:30:16 EST Finally Friday Should be a good day. We ate out lunch yesterday instead of today and I ordered the steamed chicken and shrimp with Chinese vegetables again. It was so good and I only used about half the sauce they serve with it. Was still within my calorie range but I'm thinking that next time I get it, I'll dip my fork in the sauce like I do with creamy salad dressings. I'll wind up using a lot less. I also want to get a cheap set of measuring cups and spoons to stash at work so I'm more accurate about my ... Fri, 4 Oct 2013 05:56:17 EST Activity Tracker, Goals, and Plans for Fall/Winter I got my activity tracker yesterday afternoon and absolutely love it. I used it during my treadmill workout and it's a huge improvement over trying to find the right treadmill speed for my calories burnt. I LOVE that although it does count my steps it does not count my everyday stuff as a workout. It did however include the few minutes walking from the treadmill back to my car as part of my workout and you know what? I'll take it. I was still in cool down mode. <em>545</em> <BR> <BR> Scal... Thu, 3 Oct 2013 05:53:38 EST Walking to work and "slacking" on rest days I think I'm going to try a leisurely walk to work this weekend to time it out. I need to pace myself so I don't get there all hot and sweaty, but it's still a workout. My daughter stays at my grandmother's house 2-3 days a week which is through my backyard and we're about a mile or so away from work. It's completely doable but I have OCD about being late for anything. I need to know about how long it should take me and if I can do it without getting all gross. I may even consider getting mys... Wed, 2 Oct 2013 06:14:27 EST 5K aftermath After my 5K, I was shaking, I was sore, and if I bent over to remove the magnetic tracker, I thing I would have fallen over. The next couple days I was sore in places I never thought would hurt after simply walking. Shins, yes, I expected, but my rear and shoulders hurt too which surprised me a little. <BR> <BR> Here's what I didn't expect. Confidence. I went to the gym last night for my normal workout and was amazed at how I felt. Last week, I found the 3 minute jogging intervals very diffi... Tue, 1 Oct 2013 06:22:49 EST Spark Activity Tracker Just bought it, am kind of excited about it. I've been wanting one but I didn't want to spend a couple hundred dollars on the higher end ones. The only concern I have is it tracking calories for "every day" activities. Aren't those already considered under your BMR? <BR> <BR> Anyone have theirs yet? Like it? Hate it? Please share. <BR> <BR> I'm a little disappointed in my weigh in this morning. Given the 5K, I expected a better number but, I'm sure I've got some water retention and figure ... Mon, 30 Sep 2013 06:04:52 EST I did it!! The 5K is over. <BR> I did it! I'm a little sore but I'm so glad I did it. I did catch myself looking around before the start thinking, wow, I'm the fattest person here. Didn't matter, I did it I less time than I thought I would and I did not come in dead last. Now hopefully my daughter naps today so I can too. <em>364</em> Sat, 28 Sep 2013 10:53:42 EST Thanks for the support Once again I have to take the time to thank everyone who's been supporting me on my sparkpage, blogs, and on the message boards. This is the most successful I've ever been on Sparkpeople and I have to say that all of you are a huge part of it. Joining in on the Sparkteams and message boards has been an amazing experience. It's wonderful to go in and just lay it all out there, good or bad, successes or failures, and meet people who are not judging me. All of you are amazing! Thank you so much!... Fri, 27 Sep 2013 05:57:13 EST 26 lbs done! Really? 26lbs? I can't believe it. only 9lbs left until my 10% goal. That seems like nothing now. I planned on making 10% by Nov 1st and it's starting to look like I may beat that goal! So excited. <em>7</em> <BR> <BR> I've slacked on the blogging lately mostly because I've been allowing myself to sleep in a little and simply ran out of time when my daughter woke up. I think I've been pushing myself too hard with the extra workout at 3:30 am. So, plan is to get more sleep in, get up at 4a... Thu, 26 Sep 2013 06:03:04 EST Countdown to 5K I can't believe how fast this is coming up. I've decided that due to the cold mornings here, I'm going to leave my daughter at home with my husband. I still have a fear of coming in dead last but I don't really think it'll happen. I just want to be able to come back and say I did it, no matter how I finish. I just need to run to the store sometime this week and grab a hat. I didn't have time this past weekend. <em>331</em> <BR> <BR> I'm still kicking myself a little bit for the weekend b... Mon, 23 Sep 2013 05:54:52 EST Beating myself up a little So I had a few bad for you meals the last two days. I'm certain part of it is PMS, it seems like every time I hit that time of the month, I want to eat bad things, wings, pizza, Chinese food. Normally (at least lately) I'm able to make adjustments and work around indulging without overdoing it. Not this weekend...Friday started out...ok. The wings we had at work, I split a meal with a co-worker rather than eating the whole thing myself. But I got home and my husband had a pizza. Then yesterda... Sun, 22 Sep 2013 04:44:32 EST Unbelievable There is a little over 10lbs left before my 1st 10% goal. Amazing! I can't believe how well this is going. <BR> <BR> I've lost weight in the past but I don't think there has ever been a time where I've done it with both diet and exercise. I used to work retail and technically I was getting the exercise in because I was on my feet all day but, I was younger and eating pretty much whatever I wanted to. The other time I lost a lot of weight I was going to fitness classes 4-5 days a week but I s... Thu, 19 Sep 2013 05:54:55 EST rough start but the day got better Started off just not feeling right. Didn't get in my morning workout because I was just plain tired. I also wound up in the mood to eat junk so I'm probably hormonal. But I stayed on plan and walked/jogged at the gym. I just hope my crappy morning doesn't reflect on the scale. Hopefully I feel better tomorrow. Wed, 18 Sep 2013 21:13:23 EST Ugh Scales LOL so with 2 minutes I gained/lost 10 lbs.... <em>225</em> <BR> <BR> I'll have to "verify" my losses on my grandmother's scale when I drop off my daughter this week. <BR> <BR> My MIL brought my daughter to the store yesterday and bought her an oversize sweat shirt. I'm thinking that would work well over a long sleeve shirt the morning of the 5K. I don't want to overdress her but she's going to be seated the entire time so she'll feel how cold it is out more than I will. I think I should... Tue, 17 Sep 2013 06:26:19 EST Sparkpeople recipe I tried out a pumpkin spice muffin recipe I found on the spark recipe site. Not only was it super easy, but it was REALLY good. It was also only 92 calories. Definitely not the same as Dunkin's but saving over 350 calories is well worth it. Will absolutely make them again. <BR> <BR> I'm going to be bumping up my treadmill time the next couple of weeks to get ready for the 5K. I'll probably still walk the whole thing but I want to increase my stamina at least a little bit. <BR> Sun, 15 Sep 2013 19:55:48 EST Jogging The jogs are getting easier. I've found myself increasing the speed a little during the jogging intervals. In fact, I've actually got to watch it. I almost stumbled a little because I tried to move faster than the treadmill....oops <em>198</em> That would have been fun. Then again, if I fall, I just have to pick myself up, brush myself off and so long as there's no injury, hop right back on. Regardless, I bumped up the speed a little and kept moving. I'm feeling better after the workouts a... Sat, 14 Sep 2013 20:24:37 EST Disappointment will not ruin my plans So I officially signed up for my first 5K. I paid my registration so there's no turning back now. I felt good so I called my mother and told her about it. I told her that if the weather's good I'm going to take my daughter in the stroller with me. Her comment was "you're going to put her through that??" <BR> <BR> I didn't even know what to say. When I said that this was a good thing she said, "yeah, its good for you, she's not going to be able to handle being in the stroller for that long" <... Thu, 12 Sep 2013 19:31:30 EST DIY 5K I made inquiries about the 5K in my area, I have a couple more weeks before registration ends so once they get back to me I'll sign up. I've decided to map out my own 5K and take my daughter out, weather pending. Maybe after I've done it, it won't seem so scary to me. Who says I have to wait for a public event to do this? <BR> <BR> I'm not sure what exactly scares me about the 5K and is holding me back. Maybe I'm afraid of being judged or criticized. I really shouldn't worry about what peopl... Thu, 12 Sep 2013 04:58:43 EST Planning and flexibility So I usually go to the gym 3-4 times a week in the evenings. Last night my husband told me he's subbing on his dad's bowling team tonight which means no gym for me tonight or tomorrow. (He plays pool on Thursday nights) So, time to make adjustments and whip out the DVD exercises. Tonight I'm thinking bellydancing, and maybe pick some random new video on Hulu and try it out. <BR> <BR> I log my weigh in's on Thursdays and Mondays but I'm looking forward to tomorrows' it looks like another 3 lb... Wed, 11 Sep 2013 05:54:14 EST Pedometers and possible 5K? I'm not all that excited with my steps during the day. I didn't even hit 5000 steps but I didn't wear the pedometer during my workouts so maybe it won't be that bad. I may try using the pedometer to measure my distance/calories when I take walks outside. It's tough working at a desk all day but I'll find a way to sneak in some exercise. I'm tempted to buy one of those mini bikes just to stick it under my desk LOL. <em>108</em> <BR> <BR> I've been looking at the local 5K coming up and I'm ... Tue, 10 Sep 2013 05:58:08 EST Throwing it away I'm thinking of doing some serious de-cluttering. We have so many things that we don't need in this house. I have clothes from before I gained more weight that I need to sort through. I'm pretty sure there are some I don't even like in that closet. I have a bread-maker that we didn't use much because it didn't come out all that great and there was too much. A George Foreman type grill that we never use. so much junk in such a small place. <BR> <BR> I bought the Jillian Michaels Ripped in 30 ... Mon, 9 Sep 2013 05:37:18 EST Slightly disappointed I went to the store ready to replace my too big clothes with new ones, especially my gym clothes and pajamas. I'm still proud of myself but this is one of the reasons I wanted to lose weight, I can't find things I like in my size. The biggest size in active wear is two sizes smaller than my new size and they didn't even have plus size pajama sets unless I want a muumuu nightgown. I did find pajamas in my size online but I'm not sure if I want to spend that much. Don't they know that big girl... Sun, 8 Sep 2013 10:09:24 EST My legs are killing me Ok, so I did week 5 of the bootcamp workout. I forgot how much I hate outer and inner thigh workouts. It included laying down leg lifts then circles. I pushed through it but OMG that hurts LOL. I used to take strength training classes and when the instructor felt evil, she made us do the leg lifts but instead of circles we had to "write" the alphabet, sometimes in both upper and lower case. I know that these workouts will get easier the more I do them. I also know that I need to challenge mys... Fri, 6 Sep 2013 05:41:10 EST 17.4 lbs gone <em>225</em> <BR> <BR> Today I don't hate the scale. Actually, most days since I've gotten back on track, I don't hate the scale. I'm half-way to my first 10% goal and that excites me. I'm dying to see 300 go away. My 10% goal is 312 pounds. Once I hit that, losing another 13 doesn't really look all that bad. I know I talked about rewards and such but I'm thinking since I will need to do the shopping anyhow, my reward with mostly be clothing to replace the clothes that are too big. This t... Thu, 5 Sep 2013 05:41:18 EST Thanks Everyone and Good morning I just wanted to say thanks for all the comments and compliments I've been getting on my blog. There are so many reasons I'm doing this and it's nice to know I may be helping someone along the way by sharing this experience. <BR> <BR> One of the big reasons I've been blogging is to keep honest with myself and to keep myself accountable. What's nice about this is I can also pass on my failures along with my achievements and I'm not being judged. You're all wonderful and supportive people. <BR... Wed, 4 Sep 2013 05:36:08 EST Camera Shy I hide from cameras. I really need to stop. Regardless of how I look now, this is who I am at this point in my life. No matter how much weight I lose, I cannot erase the weight that I had. But, I can't hide from life and be absent from pictures because I'm fat. Someday my daughter may ask about them, "where were you mommy?". This obviously goes beyond cameras. I was listening to Jillian Michaels podcast and she was talking about putting things off until... <BR> <BR> I know I'm as guilty as m... Tue, 3 Sep 2013 05:53:38 EST Sparkpeople bootcamp day 1 and almost 15lbs down Good morning everyone and Happy Labor day. <BR> <BR> This morning I started the Sparkpeople 28 day bootcamp. I've been poking around on the videos and just have to say how happy I am that they have links to post them on your fitness tracker. I use the quick track normally for my strength training because I think those minutes should count but it would be nice to know how many calories are being burned too. <BR> <BR> Day 1 is a cardio workout and while I couldn't do some of the moves (no jum... Mon, 2 Sep 2013 05:28:21 EST New nephew and potty training woes We met my nephew today. He's 5 weeks old but was a little premature so between him still being at the hospital an hour away and not being able to be around other children (ie my daughter) we haven't been able to go to see them. <BR> <BR> He is a beautiful baby boy and my daughter is in love with her baby cousin. He was the first infant she has been around and she did a great job. I'm very proud of my little girl. She touched his hands and feet very gently and was extremely concerned when he ... Sun, 1 Sep 2013 19:37:58 EST Temptations... <img src=""> <BR> <BR> ..... <BR> <BR> <BR> Yeah, that's what happened yesterday afternoon at work. Luckily the manager who brought it in came in during lunch so I was satisfied enough not to be as interested. But the I logged on to Sparkpeople and looked at my nutrition tracker....checked the calories for my favorite Boston Crème....390 calories....ok, chocolate glazed....270 calories....glazed? 220 calories... I logged o... Sat, 31 Aug 2013 12:00:18 EST Finally Friday and 10 % at a time The weekend is almost here and despite the rough start I had a really good week. I've got a busy weekend ahead and I'm praying it doesn't rain Sunday. I already got the passes to the zoo from our library but if it rains we are stuck. But at least we can still see my nephew. On that note, I already know that my brother is ordering pizza for lunch. So I'm going to make sure I plan my calories accordingly. I'm not going to go crazy, I'll stick to one slice and make sure I have and apple before w... Fri, 30 Aug 2013 04:11:18 EST 4 more pounds gone I actually stepped on the scale 3 times to make sure I wasn't dreaming. I know I shouldn't take the bad weigh ins too seriously as long as I'm still doing my workouts and staying within my calories, but when I lose it feels so amazing. I almost want to do a little happy dance. <em>355</em> <BR> <BR> I was extra surprised because I was on the higher end of my calorie range yesterday whereas I normally stick close to the bottom. <BR> <BR> At work we order out every Friday. This week I wan... Thu, 29 Aug 2013 04:12:54 EST