PUDGYNOMORE's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=PUDGYNOMORE PUDGYNOMORE's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ It's all about the pants http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5724794 This week my pants started feeling good again. <BR> No more tight waistband <BR> No more wedgies. <BR> <BR> Yesterday I went to the lake with my grand kids and felt prepared. <BR> I had my egg salad in two celery sticks, <BR> I had my afternoon yogurt in a smoothie safely tucked away on ice. <BR> I had two carrots cut up into yummy sticks and as a safety precaution <BR> I had an apple tucked away. <BR> <BR> I felt solid. <BR> <BR> Well...after hours of swimming and Kayaking it wasn't eno... Tue, 24 Jun 2014 10:27:01 EST Allow only love http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5677007 As I go more and more into silence <BR> It's easier to see where and how <BR> I fail. <BR> <BR> I have allowed judgement to <BR> flavor my words and actions <BR> In the past. <BR> <BR> Each time I opened my mouth to speak <BR> my words were flavored with my own pain <BR> and drama from the past. <BR> <BR> Today I start fresh <BR> Let me begin and end each moment with <BR> Love. Mon, 21 Apr 2014 11:11:13 EST Friends http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5514617 <BR> This year I started feeding the birds in earnest. <BR> I have four feeders. <BR> Two hold mixed seed. <BR> Two hold black sunflower. <BR> Sunflowers must be bird-chocolate because, <BR> Sunflower feeders need to be filled daily. <BR> <BR> In the beginning, the birds would fly away <BR> The minute I opened the door. <BR> After the first month, they would fly from the <BR> Tree, but stay nearby to see what would happen. <BR> Now a few flutter around my head as I try to <BR> Fill the ... Tue, 15 Oct 2013 21:12:44 EST Reset page by pushing ctrl 0 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5425533 Note to self. <BR> <BR> You know nothing. Thu, 18 Jul 2013 15:51:56 EST Casualties http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5313692 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/9/0/l909628217.jpg">A little deer climbed my hill today. <BR> At first I thought he was diseased. On his left side I saw a huge infection just below the right shoulder. When he turned I saw a hole just below the left shoulder. <BR> <BR> It’s rare to see a baby deer hit by a bullet and live. <BR> <BR> In sorrow, I stood at my window and sent love and healing his way as I wondered how many months he had struggled with his grievous wound. <BR> ... Sat, 6 Apr 2013 13:53:16 EST What do I value http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5221377 If you were to ask me what it is that I value, I would say Love, family, friends, quiet, beauty, art, nature, health, music and much, much more. But if you asked me how I spent my day, I would have to tell you that although many of those things that I mentioned are present, I spend way too much of my time in front of a glowing screen. <BR> <BR> With the Australian open going on I spend at least 3-6 hours in front of the television and I would say a good two hours on this computer. <BR> <BR... Thu, 24 Jan 2013 09:50:03 EST Being mindful...being love http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5196526 Being present in every moment is my goal. I still have a long way to go to achieve that one but anything worth doing takes practice and this practice is turning out to be well...fun and educational. <BR> <BR> I was reading a little of Thich Nhat Hanh the other day and came to a part about mindfulness. He wrote something about how sometimes we all do things that we know are not in our best interest but we do them anyway and asked the question. What is that all about? <BR> <BR> That senten... Tue, 8 Jan 2013 08:50:10 EST It's been a big food fest pig out week for me http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5168013 I grew up with guns and learned how to shoot by the time I was six years old. I couldn’t tell you what kind of gun I learned to shoot on, only that it was big and knocked me on my butt when I pulled the trigger. My father was a hunter of deer as well as a deputy in the county in which we lived. Growing up I didn’t have an opinion on guns even after a neighbor boy accidentally shot his brother. I thought that the kids were at fault for messing around with their parent’s things. <BR> <BR> ... Sun, 16 Dec 2012 10:41:11 EST One Get out of Trouble Free Card http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5162579 Christmas is just around the corner but after years of a house brimming with children,which always meant multiple christmas programs, Christmas concerts, Christmas fund raisers and wraping, wraping. As a result we are well...kind of tired of the whole Christmas thing. <BR> <BR> These days we keep the tiny little Christmas tree in it's box until the day the kids show up. Once in awhile we will have a big family shin dig and we go out and get a live tree and try to spruce the house up a bit.... Mon, 10 Dec 2012 20:59:28 EST Family gatherings...why do we do that again??? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5142504 Oh no it's Thanksgiving again. <BR> <BR> My childhood was a horror of alcoholics that used every excuse to drink themselves silly, with the holiday always disintegrating into chaos. <BR> <BR> For years holidays would start creeping up and I would get nervous. Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, and the 4th of July made me want to run for the hills. <BR> <BR> As I've gotten older and compared stories with friends, I've found that we all have the same family. Ok, maybe I had more then my s... Wed, 21 Nov 2012 11:33:26 EST The scale kicked my butt http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5137330 Ok, Ok, I wasn't going to weigh in until Monday, but it's impossible not to weigh in every day when you do the WII. I knew that my pants were tight but wanted to wait until Monday to let the salt leach out of my body. After 8 days sitting on my butt in the car, I knew it was bad, but this morning I found out just how bad. <BR> <BR> Eight stinkin pounds bad. 888888888888888888888888888 <BR> <BR> For the first time in many months my trusted wii said nasty words to me. <BR> <BR> "You are o... Fri, 16 Nov 2012 10:34:23 EST Changing life patterns http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5099608 After a year spent getting into shape and changing my eating patterns, I'm doing pretty good. I can see clearly how easy it would be to slip back into some old unhealthy habits so I will have to stay focused as I move forward to add new behaviors and patterns to the rest of my life. <BR> <BR> Looking around at my friends, family and myself, I can see how we all get "stuck" in our patterns. People that I have known for thirty years plus, are still dealing with the same issues that they were... Mon, 15 Oct 2012 09:25:55 EST Focus http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5081961 I've put a limit of 15 minutes on my computer time for the last two weeks. It's helping me to focus and to do the things that I want to do. <BR> <BR> "Only this one thing before me" Has become my mantra. <BR> <BR> Life is good. <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/6/2/l624920704.jpg"> Mon, 1 Oct 2012 10:41:48 EST Happy one year anniversary to my new body! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5047022 Can it already be a year that I started this journey with all of you? <BR> <BR> Yes it can! I feel like I've made life long friends and family as a result of staying true to myself and giving myself the gift of health. <BR> <BR> So one year ago I weighed a heavy 179 ish give or take a few honesty points. <BR> Today I am an honest 132. <BR> <BR> One year ago Today <BR> calves 15" 13" <BR> Thighs 25" 21.25" <BR> Butt 44.5" ... Thu, 6 Sep 2012 12:02:25 EST It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5007957 I stole that line from EE Cummings. <BR> <BR> I like saying to myself over and over again during the days and nights of my life's despairs. <BR> <BR> You know those moments when you just don't feel smart enough, nice enough, loving enough, clever enough. <BR> <BR> When I was overweight, it was all about the weight but not what lay underneath. As the weight came off, more and more issues floated to the top of my consciousness and Now I'm realizing that the work is just beginning. <BR> <BR... Thu, 9 Aug 2012 09:36:05 EST Getting thin one thought at a time http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4991449 <BR> Learning to change my thoughts has been the most difficult task of my life. I’ve been working on it for years but didn’t get serious about it until I started to lose weight in a serious way. <BR> <BR> As the layers came off on the outside, I noticed “trigger” weight. Places that I would stall at for long periods of time regardless of exercise or holding to my chosen diet plan. <BR> <BR> Instead of getting frustrated this time I began to look within to see if I could find a reoccurri... Sun, 29 Jul 2012 09:40:54 EST Relationship http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4946602 Today I read a blog that got me thinking about relationships. It's a great blog and deserves a read. The title "Is the Honeymoon Over?" By Valmr2 Check it out. <BR> <BR> Anyway. I love that title. <BR> <BR> Everytime one of my kids or friends gets into a serious relationship and comes to me for advice I always tell them one thing. <BR> <BR> Any relationship that is important to you requires that you work on it every day. <BR> <BR> Right now I'm thinking about my relationships. Mr. Sk... Thu, 28 Jun 2012 17:17:25 EST The importance of tracking http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4931237 I jumped on my wii this morning to do yoga and was shocked to find out that it had been 14 days since my last session. Whaaaat???? How can that be? I've been getting quite a bit of exercise without it but my morning workout on wi is kind of like the canary in the coal mine. If I'm not working out on the wii at 5AM something is out of balance. So what's up I ask myself and take a look at my trackers, the calendar and my journal. This past week we had a lovely time with family I see. Hmmm ... Mon, 18 Jun 2012 09:47:33 EST what a great week http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4926160 Grand kids, a nephew, Mr. Skinny, Siena and a Sister in law is a recipe for a fantastic week of camping and adventuring. Two little boys found lots of confidence when they both learned how to ride a bike without training wheels. <BR> <BR> Siena was in heaven with so many people to throw the ball and give hugs to. <BR> <BR> Mr. Skinny had lots of kid energy to play tag, explore and tell jokes with. <BR> <BR> I mostly just hung out and soaked in the love. <BR> <BR> Great week, now back to ... Thu, 14 Jun 2012 10:56:55 EST I just want cookies http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4915264 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/6/7/l676425550.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Here is a picture of the smartest, most loving and loyal dog that I have ever known. Her name is Siena and I almost lost her today. <BR> <BR> This morning she came to my side of the bed and put her paws on the mattress. I said "too early girl, go back to bed." She did go back to bed but ten minutes later she was back again trying to get me to go downstairs. I didn't open my eyes but firmly told her to go back ... Wed, 6 Jun 2012 19:31:17 EST Why I love being a team leader http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4913247 Community at its best. <BR> <BR> This has been a tough year for a lot of members on our team. We've shared illness, death, set backs and tragedy. <BR> <BR> This has been a great year for a lot of members on our team. We've shared new babies and grand babies, weddings, trips and magic. <BR> <BR> This has been an amazing year for a lot of members on our team. We've worked hard, learned a lot about ourselves, set new goals and learned to open up our hearts and minds to each other and the w... Tue, 5 Jun 2012 13:16:48 EST designing my life http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4899744 I was able to meditate 6 out of 7 days this past week. I don't have an excuse for the missing day. <BR> <BR> Today is a tennis day and the rain has stopped so I'm looking forward to being outside again. <BR> <BR> Unfortunately I learned how to play words with friends yesterday. I can see that it will be a big time dump if I don't limit myself. This little black box is such a time squeeze. I can feel it sucking my life right in as I sit here writing this blog. <BR> <BR> I've spent a lot... Sun, 27 May 2012 09:42:54 EST L.I.F.E Commitment http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4889637 Sunday morning gives me a chance to look back over my week and reflect on how well I did on my diet, my commitments, my spark streaks, my L.I.F.E. <BR> <BR> The other goals category helps me to track all aspects of my life from listening to positive music to daily meditation, water and anything else that I can dream up. What I notice this week is that I let myself down on my "daily" meditation. I only got meditation in 4 times. <BR> <BR> I told Mr. Skinny how I felt like I let myself down... Sun, 20 May 2012 11:06:59 EST Ahhh Chaco http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4883967 Chaco canyon has to be one of the most spiritual places on planet earth. We took the North road in after dire warnings about the south road being washed out. Mind you, the north road is no picnic...it's 20 miles of wash board dirt. We were a little afraid to take the trailer in but decided to give it a go. The 20 miles took an hour of slow and careful driving and turned out to be no problem. A lot of people don't go into Chaco because the road scares them off. It's not terrible if you d... Wed, 16 May 2012 10:42:39 EST Wake up http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4854720 I kept telling my son that my "mother radar" told me that he was fine, that all would be well. <BR> <BR> I just returned from a trip to my youngest son's home. As some of you know he had a tumor removed which turned out to be cancer. <BR> <BR> My first reaction was complete and total anger my that older son had the same "old man" cancer at about the same age (early 30's) as my younger son. For a minute I got caught up in the whys and how comes. <BR> <BR> <BR> Funny how that little six l... Fri, 27 Apr 2012 10:55:29 EST Courage http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4836683 How do you pick yourself up and put your life together after the worst you can imagine has happened? <BR> <BR> Courage. <BR> <BR> Some mornings just getting out of bed takes all the courage you can muster. <BR> <BR> Picking up the phone. <BR> <BR> Talking to a friend. <BR> <BR> Grief sucks the life right out of the brightest day. <BR> <BR> You look around and think...."What's wrong with these people, this car, this world." <BR> <BR> You think...."Shouldn't it all be at a stand still?... Sun, 15 Apr 2012 21:28:48 EST Life in inches http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4817717 Now that I feel skinny I'm kind of pissed off. <BR> Don't get me wrong. I love the small sizes that fit without cutting off circulation. I love not feeling winded when I walk upstairs to put laundry away. I love being able to vacuum my entire house on the same day. <BR> <BR> I'm pissed because the difference between feeling great about myself and feeling lousy turns out to be a matter of inches. It's interesting the difference an inch makes in the way clothing fits and the way that you f... Mon, 2 Apr 2012 23:00:58 EST Tucson, Silver city, Cat walk and Gila cliff dwellings http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4813758 Tucson is a huge sprawling city with beautiful mountains in every direction. The Cacti are everywhere and in every shape. Saguaro cactus is my favorite because they come with a sense of humor. Each is different and dresses itself with a different personality. Some are straight (they don't put on arms until they are around 70 years old) but most have crazy shapes that make me laugh. I remember reading a book years ago about monks at a particular monastery that specialized in doing somethi... Sat, 31 Mar 2012 15:20:43 EST The Valley of Fire Day 11 and 12 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4803002 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/3/7/l371217076.jpg"> <BR> <BR> The following morning we set off for The Valley of Fire, which turned out to be one of the most spectacular places on earth. <BR> <BR> The campground in The Valley of fire is right up against interesting red rock right out of a movie set. Actually it turns out a lot of westerns have been filmed in the park. <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/4/0/l409355640.jpg"> <BR> <BR> February is a great ti... Sat, 24 Mar 2012 18:22:38 EST Day 8 through 10ish Death Valley Oh the light! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4795843 Death Valley is 3 million acres of light, wonder, beauty, mystery and while we were there...wind. <BR> <BR> If you ever make it to this amazing park know that it takes time to fall in love with it. I can't imagine going in the summer months because of the intense heat. The winter and early spring are perfect for exploring and hiking the beautiful canyons. <BR> <BR> It's a National park so our poor puppy was not allowed on any of the hikes but we were able to walk her on the road and in th... Mon, 19 Mar 2012 22:05:49 EST Magical thinking http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4794693 I'm interrupting my regular scheduled travel blog to say a few words about weight gain. Here they are....Damn and Damn again! <BR> <BR> I just stepped on the scale and got the official reality check....2.4 lbs UP! <BR> <BR> I weighed in last Friday and was up 2.6 but wrote it off as dehydration....lack of exercise....a few too many sips of Mr. Skinny's Fru Fru coffee drinks. <BR> <BR> It was for all of these reasons and MORE so many more that I'm embarrassed to list them. The truth is ... Mon, 19 Mar 2012 10:16:13 EST Day 7 Red Rock Canyon in California just outside of Mohave http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4794118 A lot of California's State parks are closed for budget cuts. This park is open...kind of. You are on the honor system to pay. We are only one of two campers at this lovely Red Rock oasis. The desert starts getting very interesting in this area with Joshua Trees, horned lizards and various kinds of cacti. The stars outside tonight hang out just beyond our fingertips and the air is crisp and cold. <BR> <BR> We snuggle into our little nest of a home completly warm, comfortable and tired ... Sun, 18 Mar 2012 22:49:55 EST Northern California Day 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4793623 We started our trip on February 8. Of course we were exhausted from the preparations, of course we were late getting out and of course we really didn't care about those two facts. We were finally free after years of thinking and planning. This trip was to be the precursor for either many more trips to come or a new lifestyle of freedom which involved selling everything and living in simplicity. How amazing would it be to own just the things that you need to live. I knew that I had 4 plat... Sun, 18 Mar 2012 16:42:33 EST Day 13 in the desert http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4749718 I'm writing to you all in Lake Havasu, AZ. It's a warm 66 degrees. The coats are stashed for a few days as we head into the warm part of the adventure. Our favorite park so far is Valley of Fire. You might want to google it to see some of the pictures until I can post mine. There are petroglyphs everywhere. Sitting to meditate in a hidden valley at dawn the energy nearly lifted me off the rock. Ok, Just my imagination but it was very powerful. Only 200,000 people visit the park every ... Tue, 21 Feb 2012 14:34:59 EST Desert Lesson http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4743952 When I first arrived to Death Valley, it seemed foreign, hostile and forbidding. After a couple of days of hiking, driving and meditation in its canyons and open spaces, I have a deep feeling of connectedness to the land and sky that is somehow elemental. <BR> <BR> <BR> Views of ageless form combine their beauty with images in my mind of family and friends. The mixture of color and texture offers up memories of my life in a way that touches the core of my soul to a higher sense of being. ... Fri, 17 Feb 2012 20:22:22 EST In search of the sacred http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4726640 Mr. Skinny and I are heading out in the morning for parts unknown. Well...kind of unknown. We are heading to the Southwest for awhile to slow down our pace of living and to make time for quiet introspection. We both talked about writing down our intention for the trip so here is mine. <BR> <BR> I intend to spend quiet time everyday in meditation. I intend to stay on cycle three in order to solidify my new way of eating. I intend to honor my new body and to come back feeling like a skinn... Tue, 7 Feb 2012 08:51:04 EST Becoming 51% loving 24/7 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4723333 I've been working on this for about two years now. It's a real chore monitoring my thoughts, actions, words, and deeds but my life is changing quickly as I slowly get up to speed in making sure that I don't contribute to the negativity in our world. <BR> <BR> When my ego steps in, I work hard to correct my dysfucntional relationship to the now. Life is full, beautiful and wonderful when I can remember the simplicity of being. <BR> <BR> Gone are the days of listening to negativity from t... Sun, 5 Feb 2012 11:29:12 EST Sometimes it's ok to say shut up. Sometimes it's ok to yell it. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4708846 We spent the day with our grandchildren yesterday. As usual they always wind up teaching me something about myself. <BR> <BR> As usual when you have two children in a car together there was much squabbling. The younger one always imagining that the older was either picking on him, getting something better then him, or teasing him. Of course she is a master at getting under her younger brother's skin. <BR> <BR> We had talk after talk about how we make things up in our heads and how impo... Sat, 28 Jan 2012 15:03:02 EST Windows of opportunity http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4704763 The world beyond the window waits for anyone who refuses to see the wall. I wrote that years ago and try very hard to live by it. It's not always easy when you are trying to lose weight and keep hitting that wall. <BR> <BR> Last week I lost a dear life long friend who died blind, crippled and confused. Over the last 40 years we had many talks about that wall and window. He worked on his weight on and off for his entire life. I can remember a soup faze where he made a different kind o... Thu, 26 Jan 2012 08:44:45 EST Practice, Practice, Practice. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4699453 Most mornings I sit in meditation for around 30 minutes. It gives me time to clear my mind and open my heart. Most of the time as I go through the process I find my mind wondering and gently bring it back to present by concentrating on my breath or one of the numerous mantras that I use. Interspersed between the silence I offer up prayers of thanksgiving, surround people in need with white and golden light and sit in silence. Once in a great while I will have an amazing break through that ... Mon, 23 Jan 2012 16:43:27 EST Asking the right questions http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4697149 Last Tuesday we got a call that no parents wants to receive. Our youngest son told us that he had been passing out several times during the previous week and was heading to the emergency room to get some help. <BR> <BR> We jumped in the car and made the 300 mile trip to find him at home resting. He is fine now but it took some time and investigative questions to figure out that he was getting over dosed on some medication that was prescribed several years ago. <BR> <BR> Because of the 1... Sun, 22 Jan 2012 15:46:35 EST Friday the 13th must be my lucky day. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4678222 My weight this morning reflected the weight that I was exactly 13 years ago. The year was 1994 and we had just decided to foster a little nine year old girl. She had visited our home for a planned weekend respite . I got up in the middle of the night to her crying. When I went into the room she fell into my arms and begged me not to send her back to her other foster home. <BR> <BR> Mr. Skinny and I were not sure at this point that we were ready to take on a child. Our youngest son was ... Fri, 13 Jan 2012 12:00:27 EST How Spark People almost burned down my house http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4674538 I take being a team leader serious....maybe too serious. <BR> <BR> As some of you know I'm a silkscreener by trade. My garage is where I house my shop and I run back and forth from the shop to the computer in the dinning room several times a day to check and see if I need to respond to emails. <BR> <BR> I also keep my spark teams on to chime in, or send out goodies if needs be. Yesterday I was working hard on a 100 shirt run for the up and coming Martin Luther King celebration when ran to... Wed, 11 Jan 2012 18:41:26 EST The promise of a new grandchild. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4665746 My oldest daughter has been trying to conceive for over seven years. I woke to hear the good news on my answering machine that her prayers are finally answered. It's kind of hard timing but kids usually are. My daughter just graduated from nursing school on Friday. I don't know how this will effect her career that she is so excited about starting, but I do know that she will make a fantastic mother. I'm so happy for her but also feel a greater need to work harder to make the world a bett... Sun, 8 Jan 2012 09:35:18 EST Living out loud http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4650522 I was a shy kid no two ways about it. I sat quietly in school and tried hard not to get noticed even though "being noticed" was the thing that I longed for most. I grew up in a blended family with six kids, a harried mother and abusive step father. You know the story "typical american family" <BR> <BR> Like most people it took me years to survive my childhood. I still feel the repercussions occasionally but I've worked through the lions share of baggage that my childhood came with. I k... Mon, 2 Jan 2012 08:36:05 EST Why you will lose more weight in January http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4644777 Christmas is over, your house is starting to look like something you used to know again. The relatives have vacated the extra bedroom, bathroom, kitchen, family room, and car. They took with them the extra dog or two that still had some potty issues, and you've finally located that dirty diaper's location that's been filling your car with a certain bouquet. <BR> <BR> The TV is off for the first time in days. The teenager that had to listen to his music on full blast and wouldn't be reaso... Fri, 30 Dec 2011 11:36:28 EST My friend is now my lover. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4643237 Coffee used to be my friend. I would visit it once in awhile, we would talk, share space and enjoy each other's company. This morning after a long night in the emergency room sitting with friends, coffee has become my lover. There's no help for me, I'm head over heels for coffee. I love it's smell, texture, color and more importantly I love the way I feel when I'm near it. Love right?? Of course it's love. <BR> Ok, Ok, Ok, you think that I'm turning my back on green tea....I know, I kn... Thu, 29 Dec 2011 12:04:16 EST I'm losing it! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4638279 Well, tomorrow is my birthday and I thought that I would be at my goal weight based on my own not very scientific methods. I'm still 8 lbs off from my original goal of 130. So what! I know that the 17 Day Diet works and I'm staying the course. As a matter of fact I'm ready to up the stakes and change my goal to 125 which means I get to hang around this team longer. <BR> <BR> My youngest son and his wife bought me a Body Bugg for my birthday. I'm not very technical but I think that it's... Mon, 26 Dec 2011 00:04:00 EST I'm going to trust my body. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4631188 Now that I'm getting closer to my goal just about every well-meaning friend tells me that I need to stop losing weight. It always confuses me and makes me doubt myself. I feel fantastic and I'm on a roll right now where losing weight seems easier then ever. Now that I'm on round three I can look back over my journey and it's plain to see that traveling is my down fall for losing weight. I eat well when I'm on the road, but the combination of sitting and not getting in my exercise totall... Mon, 19 Dec 2011 09:56:01 EST Where did all my fat pictures go??? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4628643 I love digital cameras because the come with an erase button. I have not been brave enough to put a picture on at my heaviest and now I'm having a hard time finding one. I have two from last summer this isn't at my worst but I'm around 179ish. I don't know how it survived my vigilant deleting ego. I suppose it's because I couldn't bring myself to delete my sweet grandson. Notice how I have him strategically positioned in front of my belly? <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/n... Fri, 16 Dec 2011 22:50:41 EST