PAMELAHJ's SparkPeople Blog

Back Slide Back on Track!

Tue, 5 Jul 2011 19:13:14 EST

Well, I have to say I have had a couple of rough months. I did backslide (14 lbs) but I have now joined weight watchers and I am amazed at how I had forgotten the right portion sizes - and how satisfying eating a variety of foods are - especially fruit.

I think I will go on HCG one more time in September. I know people who think it is not healthy and does not work but it really does work the problem is you still have to live your life after losing and if you do not have the coping...

I Am So Touched...

Thu, 2 Sep 2010 17:42:50 EST

I am overwhelmed with gratitude for all of you who have given me gifts. I know that it is part of life - but it is a part that I could live without (couldn't we all).

I am putting one foot in front of the other and trying to get some motivation back and you all have given me such strength.

I am a guest blogger for a site and I have written a tribute to my father. I would love to share it with my spark friends...

http://tinyurl.com/thesaddesttruth

T...

I Navigated Rough Waters!

Mon, 14 Jun 2010 16:30:54 EST

This last week was on of my biggest challenges yet! I had a party every night with amazing food and I weathered the storm!! I really would just eat a small amount of a protein item and veggies or salad.

I found that it was extremely difficult - but I didn't die, even if I wanted to at some points. I realized that I am in charge of what I put in my mouth. I may not have had a loss as big as I could have but I didn't gain and that is huge for me. Especially when you are talking abou...

A New Push Towards My Goal!

Fri, 28 May 2010 14:12:43 EST

Well - I have been learning to maintain my weight loss and now it is time to take it to the next level - this last week has been a struggle mentally, just trying to get my head right with "the restrictions" I need to place on myself to make it happen but it is finally showing on the scales!

I am so close to losing a total of 60 lbs I can taste it - and once again I have began to have self-defeating thoughts.

Can You Believe It!!!

Geeze does it ever end - why a...

Zumba - Here I Come!

Mon, 19 Apr 2010 18:23:00 EST

Started zumba class - my daughter and I are going.

It is a blast but one hour is a long time. Especially when you have been working all day.

Anyone who hasn't taken it should try it, so fun and it doesn't feel like exercise - it is teaching me to shake those hips!

Reminds me of belly dancing on steroids LOL

Easter Weekend Blues

Mon, 5 Apr 2010 15:34:55 EST

OK, I have been really good - but I fell off the wagon! It began Saturday Evening - we went with some friends to "The Melting Pot" and it was pretty expensive. It is fondue and you cook your food right at the table. I was not to bad but I did have some desert who could resist dipping cheese cake into turtle fondue??

Our friends were so generous - it was our anniversary the next day so they paid a $200.00 tab. Amazing, and we didn't expect it we were planning on going dutch!
...

Shocking but TRUE!

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 16:03:43 EST

Lately I have been having a problem that is a good thing to have. My clothes are all getting to the point of being so big they are not only baggy - but are looking sloppy.

Before going out and spending money - I went into my upstairs bedroom to see the clothes that I had bought that were to small "but they were such a good price!" or I had worn a decade ago - and just couldn't part with...

And you will not believe they all fit me! Some of them were actually big!! I fo...

Hard to Believe - But it is Happening!

Mon, 8 Mar 2010 13:38:14 EST

This morning I decided to try on a shirt that I had bought - 3 months ago that was oh so cute but because it was on the sale rack - I bought way to small - all I could see when I put it on were lumps and bumps.

I couldn't pass it up - the price was too good.

What an affirmation.

I am almost 1/2 way to my goal weight - it seems impossible but 11 more lbs and I will be there. Just a few short months ago I felt hopeless like I would just be the way I was and t...

The Reality Is?

Mon, 1 Mar 2010 11:50:02 EST

I have a strange thing happening - I don't know if it is self sabotage's or what. I have now lost 40 lbs and I wake, up look at myself, and think "Big deal" I don't see the difference?

However I do actually see it most of the time, as my clothes are to big and I get complements everyday. I now have a very noticeable waist line - and my belly is vanishing - but still I start picking at what is wrong...

I actually can see how an anorexic must feel (not that I am ...

New Time - Same Old Delema

Thu, 25 Feb 2010 09:49:41 EST

Why is it that we (I) have such a hard time mentally with not sticking everything in my mouth? Even when I am not particularly hungry -- I want to eat! Such mental torture...

I was thinking last night that I love food - and I think that is healthy. A lot of my memories are around food. My grandma cooking on Thanksgiving - the wonderful smell of turkey and all the trimmings. Eating around the table when my children were little and fixing meals that they loved to eat.

The...

Stressed - and stressing out...

Wed, 3 Feb 2010 10:03:30 EST

It is so funny - I have never weighed myself every day. On this new goal setting - plan I am on, I must weigh every day and I feel stressed about it.

Why?

I am maintaining well - I am always withing 2 lbs of my goal of maintaining my current loss - one way or the other.

The only thing I came up with is, I am feeling a loss of freedom to just fly by the seat of my pants. I cannot just put my head in the sand.

OK, I admit it I am the type that li...

Close Call - or should I say I Dodged a Bullet!

Tue, 26 Jan 2010 13:57:46 EST

What is it with our thinking - sometimes I wonder why we (I) am so self defeating!

My husband and I decided to go stay a few days out of town. And I am suppose to take a scale and weigh each morning to make sure I am staying on track but true to form I didn't after all it was only 2 days.

We ate at buffets and I wasn't horrible but because they were so expensive I ate more than I should - so you guessed it when I came home and weighed I had gained 2 lbs ugh - so I thoug...

Feeling Better - Going Forward - but a bit Scared.

Wed, 20 Jan 2010 13:58:47 EST

I am really pleased with my progress so far - almost 34 lbs now I am in the maintenance phase until March. I think it is so much easier to follow a stringent diet then to have freedom of choice - I do have rules but I have to maintain this loss for 6 weeks. After that I can go back on the protocol for another 40 days.

The thing that makes this phase so hard is I should not lose more than 2 lbs or gain more than 2 lbs for these 6 weeks it is suppose to cause you to set you weight ...

I hate it when I am down!

Mon, 11 Jan 2010 15:45:05 EST

I have been sick for over a week. It is really just counterproductive! I took care of my little grandson when my daughter had this stuff - and I thought I was bullet proof but no not true.

Sore throat, ear ache, cough that keeps me up at night - but lets look on the brights side - I don't feel like eating... LOL

I was feeling a bit better yesterday but that went down the tubes - it is really horrible especially when I own my own business and cannot do my job.

Made it through the holidays - 13 more days to go!

Mon, 4 Jan 2010 14:15:22 EST

Well I made it through New Years Eve. I sent my husband to the party without me and then I showed up about 11:30 to ring in the New Year...

It may seem like I am weak - and when it comes to good food you have that one right. The funny thing is I am not really hungry with this diet but I am really ready to eat a "real Meal" again and the temptation would be very hard - why put myself in that place!

So far I have lost a solid 26lbs and I expect to reach 30 lbs lost if not...

Ring Out the Old - Ring in the New

Thu, 31 Dec 2009 11:22:35 EST

Well pretty soon we will be into 2010. Thinking about last year - I have learned invaluable lessons - and next year will be even a better year I am sure.

I am down 24 lb and feeling like I can really get to where I want to go. It takes a lot of work but I am really happy with this last month - I have had my lows for sure but don't we all.

Today I am going to write down what I want to accomplish this next year - and I have decided I am going to start a gratitude journal ...

Down 22 lbs but yet...

Mon, 28 Dec 2009 17:15:32 EST

It was a lot of blood, sweat and tears but I am now 22 lbs lighter (with a lot more to go!)

The strange thing is the conflicting emotions, I am really happy about the weight loss yet I don't feel the emotional connection - happy or joyful about what I have done.

My main goal is to be healthy - and the older I get the more important I realize that is - none of us should take that for granted.

The physical body is so important, yet becoming obsessed with ...

Christmas Time Thoughts.

Thu, 24 Dec 2009 09:51:48 EST

This morning I woke up to a program about how in years gone by we as Americans celebrated Christmas. They had old songs and history about Bob Hope and how he would go on Christmas tours to Vietnam. They had a skit with Jonny Carson and the Tonight Show.

The old time carols of yester year - Bing Cosby, Perry Como and more, it really brought back memories. When I was a small child my parents use to play these songs on an old record player - and I remember the variety shows with all...

Feeling Great - Keeping My Feet on the Ground...

Sat, 19 Dec 2009 17:27:28 EST

I believe my weight loss is a day to day commitment - and it is like being an alcoholic "one day at a time".

Today I am doing really well and have so much more energy. But each day is a new commitment and attitude adjustment, especially when you are in the holiday season and you cannot participate in the parties! OK lets say you cannot eat the food at parties...

I have lost 15 lbs to date and really do feel good - I am avoiding all parties that have food because even th...

When thing are going well - suddenly the monster appears!

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 17:10:33 EST

Things are going very well - I am feeling great and then it happens! Those self defeating thoughts.

I keep thinking things like, oh my gosh I was down 30 lbs not even 2 years ago so I will really just be where I was at - it will feel like I didn't lose weight at all...

Duh - why would I think that? Then I beat myself up over the weight gain over the past 2 years - or even the past 6 months when I just ate what I wanted and gave into my emotions.

It feels disco...

On Day 7 of HCG - Feel Great!

Sun, 13 Dec 2009 17:41:05 EST

OK - so as extreme as this diet may seem a lot of people say it is the only way they were able to take weight off and keep it off. I have to say up to this point I have not had any physical cravings - mental cravings yes.

When I eat my snack or lunch it does fill me up believe it or not - but I cannot go to long in between or I get really cranky! I have even become pretty good at developing some interesting recipes ...

Given the fact I have such a small amount of ingred...

Ok-OK Blue I will do it! HCG Adventure...

Thu, 10 Dec 2009 18:01:20 EST

My friend Blue - blew the lid off my latest trip down the journey of weight loss so I should probably confess...

I decided to try HCG and why do you say? Well in the beginning I like a lot of you thought well of course you would lose weight on such a low calorie diet - why in the world do you need the HCG?? But then I had a client that lost 200 lbs using it, that was a year ago but I still was not convinced.

Six months later a person who I really trust, looked into it a...

Starting Over.... AGAIN

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 08:28:53 EST

I am like a hamster on a wheel - you have seen them it looks like they are going 100 miles an hour but they are really going no where fast -

Today my weight is once again what it was at the beginning. I was hiding my weight and just putting pounds lost but have decided to be up front - honest.

My husband is really frustrated but that makes me upset because it doesn't help when he get angry. He is one of those that is always within 10 pounds of his perfect weight.
...

Are you ?

Mon, 12 Oct 2009 10:05:42 EST

Today I read a sparks people article that hit the nail on the head - it is an amazing read and if you are a procrastinating sort (like I am) - this is sure to be a great read for you.

If you are like me it will make you think - and take some action - at least for today LOL (I spelled it wrong on my tinyurl but that is the link)

http://tinyurl.com/break-procratination

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Taking Life on Lifes Terms

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 11:54:31 EST

Recently had a sever blow - my father went in for an operation and they could not correct the problem.

To make a long story short - there was nothing they could do. They sent him home he cannot eat - and that is that.

Can not imagine the horror of it all - telling him was the worst but he was more worried about us then what he is facing.

Staying sane is hard enough - staying focused impossible - I flew into my food addiction in a big way this weekend.
...

Body Builders Diet hmmm...

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 09:09:19 EST

This last week I visited my son-in-law who has lost over 100 lbs in the last 5 months. He has been doing what he calls the body builders diet.

What ever your goal weight is - you take that amount in grams of protein per day. But you also stick to a 1500 calorie diet - according to he and his wife - that will just naturally be a low carb diet - because of the amount of protein you must eat. The rest will be veggies, whole grains and fruits.

Minimizing the grains and frui...

A Discovery... HMMM

Tue, 8 Sep 2009 13:33:22 EST

I decided even though I have switched from a low cal diet to a low carb diet I would track and see how many calories I am actually eating - compared to low carb.

Some people say calories are the important thing some say to many calories and you will still gain even with low carb.

I am doing an unofficial study on myself. My first discovery is that a bacon and egg breakfast is less calories than 1 small frozen chicken pot pie (Marie Callendars)!

Wow and I am...

I did It !!! At least this weekend...

Mon, 7 Sep 2009 21:17:17 EST

I did it! We had a big party on Saturday Night - with tons of food - delicious Indian food - rice, naan, noodles - "Ice Cream Cake" argh... all the carbs to avoid...

Danced until 4 it was a lot of fun---

And I did it avoided what I needed to!

Ate only what I should - but today I am craving sweets can't believe it - why ?? I think it may be because I have been drinking diet soda the last few days and I really don't usually drink anything carbonated...

Good Calories - Bad Calories - WOW

Wed, 2 Sep 2009 17:41:37 EST

As you know if you have been reading my blog- I took a sudden turn, one I should have probably stuck with years ago - a low carb lifestyle.

I was introduced to it - but did get a little frightened and just confused about really what way to go with it all.

But thanks to Blue's post on my daughters site - that really sparked my attention. And it made me decide to re-evaluate my constant hunger and fighting to stay on this weight loss/gain merry-go-round.

...

Discovering - What Works For Me...

Mon, 31 Aug 2009 10:34:59 EST

Funny thing about conventional wisdom - sometime you have to question what is right for you and is it all it is cracked up to be.

Starting the low carb diet - I had a headache but towards the 3rd day I was feeling stronger and just more mentally satisfied. I was no longer hungry like before - and my cravings were much less.

I did cheat when I went to my slumber party - but it was not hard to jump right in again and start.

I have been doing some research on t...

Finding Things That Work...

Thu, 27 Aug 2009 09:38:03 EST

I have decided to go low carb - I know that I need to eat veggies, but I have been so hungry restricting my calories that I really think this will be a needed switch.

I will still be aware of eating in a healthy manner - I know it is never easy - I have been doing this for the last 3 days and it seems to me I am just not as hungry - I still have the issue of wanting to eat because of emotions - but that challenge is different than being physically hungry!

So - I am still...

Starting My Day Off Right...

Mon, 24 Aug 2009 10:26:06 EST

I have been so tired this morning - walked the 5 k run-walk on Saturday - man that was tough! It was sooo hilly and I hadn't trained (not very smart!).

I was really sore, my calves hurt like heck - so I soaked in a hot bath with epsome salts - amazing, all the soreness was gone! I recommend it if you have a sore aching body...

The afternoon - a dieters disaster but a culinary dream! Delicious Indian food - I had a memorial service - lunch - then a birthday party complete...

Big Mistake! ...

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 22:51:19 EST

I waited way to long to eat anything of substance.

I was off and running early in the morning ( 6 am) and had a protein shake.

Snack at 11 exercised and then wow I was so hungry - I almost went to Kentucky Fried - but I didn't YEAH...

Grabbed a piece of turkey and cheese and out the door. So dinner wasn't until 6 (when I finally got home and settled) and I was just sooooo hungry.

All my calories are gone because I grab a higher calorie selection f...

Really Enjoy This Product

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 17:15:42 EST

I bought a box of SlimQuick Appetite control (pink Lemonade)

Remember from earlier my draw full of unused diet aides...

Anyway I digress - I have been using it the last few days and it really does help get you over the hump until lunch or dinner.

So if you feel like you just need something to take the edge off this is a perfect solution.

Today - WELL...

Tue, 18 Aug 2009 15:17:23 EST

Yesterday was a day when I was so tired I really had to fight to stay on track. I went over a little but not much - It is amazing how we beat ourselves up.

I got up this morning and was so upset - I really hate to have to count and plan my time - it sounds strange but I want to live in the moment - and I do not like details - I mean I am a big picture person - an artist at heart - a free bird.

Maybe that is what got me into this mess in the first place. To have to count...

Tonights Episode of Ruby...

Sun, 16 Aug 2009 23:53:02 EST

I love Ruby she is so real - and I really find so much encouragement. Tonights episode was no exception - she is really having milestones and appreciating them. I could really learn from that - how to enjoy all the things in life we take for granted

Great Show!

Fighting Those Little Voices...

Sun, 16 Aug 2009 21:38:16 EST

I have noticed that I have had times when I have felt extremely joyous this last week - I am sure it is the fact that I am doing something positive for myself and when I eat right I feel better.

I am listening to what I am saying to myself - so I can be aware of my negative self talk - and boy oh boy. You should try it - you may be amazed - when I am at a weak point it is because of what I am saying to myself.

Remember - Thoughts trigger Feeling and this brings abo...

Am I Nuts?

Sat, 15 Aug 2009 23:18:02 EST

It is day 6 and I have been really good up to this point. It is a weekend and even though I have a lot of client work to do = I find my mind wondering to food.

I feel bored, or down, or something - but flat - maybe I am nuts but that is how it feels.

It is almost like I want to eat so I don't have to clear the cob webs of my mind - or untangle thoughts and emotions.

Strange - it is an over powering urge.

I am not going to give in... I am not go...

The Pride Before the Fall

Sat, 15 Aug 2009 15:03:44 EST

It is so funny how - it seems so easy when you look back on the days - I have been doing really well the last 5 days - however I have had this feeling before - and I know the minute I think this way - I may be in for a fall.

I always think of it as the pride before the fall because once I think wow I have lost xyz - feeling pretty good, got this thing whipped... I then find myself slipping back into bad habits - or I have a day that is not as I had planned and bam.

The ...

Hoodia or Not?

Thu, 13 Aug 2009 10:55:50 EST

I decided - as I riffled through my bottles of diet supplements I have - but don't finish - to take that bottle of Hoodia and use it.

I remember now why I quit using it - it changes the taste of food - I love food and want to enjoy what I eat!

In fact when I am managing (notice I didn't say diet!) my food properly I enjoy it even more. So here I am last night getting ready to eat fresh pineapple and it doesn't even taste good!

I am now wondering if I want to...

Angry - WHAT?

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 23:32:33 EST

I know it is ridiculous but when ever I restrict my food I get angry - that I have lost the freedom to eat what I want. Where does that come from? It must be a deeply embedded emotion from a much younger age.

I have done great for 2 day but so angry...

I am reading a book that is so interesting about business - but it holds some truths that are astounding - they have what is called T - E = A

What does that me? Well "thoughts cause emotions and that will brin...

Another Monday

Mon, 10 Aug 2009 09:33:51 EST

Woke up feeling great - my daughter and I are on a mission. We are doing a biggest loser thing with her friends so I am hoping my competitive spirit will pull me through.

I also signed up for a 5 k walk run - (crazy!!) but today I will start training for that 2 week before the race - wow...

My G** One More Time

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 10:32:22 EST

I am up - by 12 pounds since I was here. Just frustrating - It is my own actions nothing else. So I have to start all over from -0. I am so frustrated with myself. I have been exercising and joined curves that is a positive.

OK I am going to pull myself up from the boot straps and today is the first day of the rest of my life - no more beating myself up.

I am done.

Amazing but True...

Wed, 25 Mar 2009 10:28:34 EST

Really funny how I cling to even 2 ounces lost. I bought a Curves Scale that shows not only pounds but ounces - I think that may be one of the best things I have done. I know I shouldn't live and die by the scales but at this point even a drop of .2 makes me happy - just to see myself going in the right direction.

Since my slip on Saturday - I just have not seen the scale budge but I am not going to get discourage - thanks to you my spark friends. I find myself really wanting to go...

My fall from grace...

Sun, 22 Mar 2009 12:33:49 EST

I did something last night - I knew instinctively I shouldn't do - but I made my husband some rice like we make that is white rice with chick peas - oil - etc.

I am not eating white rice anymore and I have been on my eating plan for 5 days without breaking it. My husband is really supporting me and he would not have minded if I gave him something else but I know he was missing having some of his favorites - like a lot of men he doesn't have a problem with weight.

Well I...

Ephifany...

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 18:38:09 EST

As I was walking on the treadmill today - I realized that I am fighting with myself - truly. I didn't want to go to the GYM. Why? I am my own worst enemy and I don't know why. I feel so much better when I work out and eat right yet here I am trying to argue with myself.

I think it comes from deep within me - I need to do some more exploring

Trying to work out the kinks.

Thu, 19 Mar 2009 10:45:06 EST

I cannot believe how I really talk to myself. My husband and I were fighting all day yesterday - I was extremely frustrated, what was my first reaction - fine I will just go and eat whatever I want.

I have been on a kick-start program doing really well for the last 3 day and I just wanted to blow it. That is totally ridiculous.. I mean who am I doing this for him or me??

Who is going to feel better and get the health benefits... I realize how juvenile thinking this way ...

Believe It or Not...

Tue, 17 Mar 2009 16:23:42 EST

I decided to be stubborn in all the right places. Yesterday I made the commitment to stick to my plan - (finally) I mean the shift that takes place in your mental attitude.

I realize that I myself have to just bite the bullet and do it. Even being hungry last night I talked myself out of doing the wrong thing.

Felling great today -

Have you ever noticed how when you stick to one goal it transcends into other parts of your life? The eating is my drug of choic...

Getting Started

Mon, 23 Feb 2009 14:03:56 EST

My last blog entry was over a month ago and I am still in the same place! it is so hard to get organized - especially when you are running 100 miles an hour trying to get clients websites up and running.

Upside - great to have such a good business

Downside - Really no exersize working on websites and marketing online!

HELP!

New Year - Healthy Life

Sun, 4 Jan 2009 21:42:22 EST

As everybody does this time of year I am now going to this with both feet. I have purchased a book called Flat Belly Diet and it talk about how important it is to journal... What a perfect place to do that -

Tomorrow day 1 of my 4 day blitz - I am not going to let it throw me into dieters mode! NO it is going to be great to feel good and see how much energy I will gain in the next 4 days... 56