OOLALA53's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=OOLALA53 OOLALA53's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ things not to say if you're an emotional eater http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5921545 <link>www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/01/25/fo<BR>od-self-judgment_n_6517110.html?utm_hp<BR>_ref=diet-and-nutrition&utm_source=Shr<BR>ink+Yourself+Mailing+List&utm_campaign<BR>=d3b15a3748-Newsletter_05_03_15&utm_me<BR>dium=email&utm_term=0_26d4536828-d3b15a3748-242509333 </link> Sat, 2 May 2015 23:04:55 EST Compassion series http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5918127 I'm considering getting this series for myself, but for anger and feelings of incompetence at work. (It occurred to me recently that I feel a lot worse about those than I do about my eating these days, and I think making progress there would actually support better eating.) I read this woman's book and have heard her on a TED talk and a webinar. However, I'm in an online course now that meets for several more weeks and also involves some meditative practices and other "homework." I don't want... Sun, 26 Apr 2015 20:10:31 EST A binge on its own is not failure http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5903604 I sometimes gets emails from a site called Can You Stay For Dinner? run by an incredible young woman who lost, I dunno, about half her weight. She wrote about it AND her love, cooking, and eventually was offered a book contract. Even after several years of successful maintenance, she started slipping and bingeing and gained back about 40 lbs., I think. (I remember when I first saw her site, I thought her weight was going to be hard to maintain, though she said she thought it was her happy wei... Wed, 1 Apr 2015 13:56:26 EST What are we fighting? What are we giving up? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5902632 I was browsing the Byron Katie site for other reasons, and came across this story. <BR> <BR> I have a seven year old son on the Autism spectrum. I have been obsessively working on my son to “cure” his condition-to the exclusion of everything. My partner, my self, even really the boy who is my son. I woke up last night and i saw the truth. Here’s what happened- <BR> I’m in Bryce’s room, it’s late and all he wants to do is sleep, the diffuser is puffing out his calming oils and the... Mon, 30 Mar 2015 23:13:41 EST emotional storms and the present moment http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5899528 Though I have thought in the past that I was learning to stay in the present moment, I find I was not doing it, and am regrouping to try again, as I don't have much faith in anything else right now. I see there is an extremely fine art to being "in the moment" in the presence of normally very distressing thoughts. It means not believing them at the same time as not fighting them with anything more than unbiased attention. I've used so many techniques to thwart them, and here I am. I think I ... Wed, 25 Mar 2015 15:30:09 EST a spiritual take on goals http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5889503 A questioner asked my spiritual teacher today what to do about the resistance he was feeling towards some of the tasks this man has to do in order to expand in his professional life. He said he was excited about some new opportunities but was feeling a lot of resistance about some things he had to learn to do. My teacher said if you are feeling a lot of resistance, drop your goal. I know many of us were a bit surprised, and I bet the questioner (online) was, too. He paused and then said, if y... Sun, 8 Mar 2015 21:47:52 EST anxiety and eating and living http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5887752 This could be good news to some and bad news to others. <BR> <BR> I've been reading a book on treatment for anorexics, though my issue was bingeing. The doctor says at one point that most anorexics have a lot of anxiety. I know that anxiety can be associated with binge eating. I honestly don't know what else you would call it when you get the sensations and strong feeling to eat, and you feel that you've just got to. (Although you don't just got to eat; you just got to wait!) Maybe it's wit... Thu, 5 Mar 2015 20:46:17 EST No one IS her disorder http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5885750 I have been thinking about how people can get very caught up in the BED mentality and equate their habits with destiny. Just because I had a habit of frequently overeating, especially certain foods, does not mean I always will. I may be have to be rather purposeful about changing that habit, but it is completely changeable, at least at any one moment in time, because it is absolutely not necessary in any way for survival, physical, mental, or emotional. Anything that says different is a misin... Mon, 2 Mar 2015 18:18:42 EST I started a meetup! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5871452 I've been toying with the idea of starting a meetup group to promote the eating principles I've adopted from the No S Diet and my research on slim cultures in the world. I finally took the plunge last Sunday, but haven't made any immediate plans for my first meeting. However, I have 16 members in my group! <BR> <BR> Here is the "about us" blurb I wrote: <BR> <BR> Are you ready to be pleased to eat? This is a group for people who want to learn to appreciate the delightful pleasure of food wi... Sat, 7 Feb 2015 20:30:08 EST waiting it out http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5870421 Does anyone else sometimes (maybe often) feel as if she's waiting for something to happen? And not in an excited way. I often feel as if something is not complete, and it seems to be something beyond the everyday unfinished business of the day. I mean, how many days can things really be finished? That's an inside job, I'm sure. Not bingeing doesn't mean getting to feel complete. But it's still better than bingeing and not feeling complete! <BR> <BR> You may remember that I declared that I w... Fri, 6 Feb 2015 00:56:31 EST accepting uncomfortable thoughts/events/emotions http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5864085 I posted this with a different name, and decided to post it with a more descriptive name so that it might come up for more people who may have an interest in such issues. <BR> <BR> <BR> I've said before that life stresses after managing bingeing are just as intense, if not worse, than the urges to binge ever were. I'm not sorry I don't have to worry about bingeing like I used to, but if you are thinking all your problems are over when you eat reasonably... well, maybe and maybe not. Yet th... Tue, 27 Jan 2015 22:49:31 EST don't want to jinx it, but http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5863321 I've said before that life stresses after managing bingeing are just as intense, if not worse, than the urges to binge ever were. I'm not sorry I don't have to worry about bingeing like I used to, but if you are thinking all your problems are over when you eat reasonably... well, maybe and maybe not. Yet that's not the topic of this blog. <BR> <BR> I think I may be starting to see something helpful. I have rather strong anxiety and anger, and often put myself (and others) through a real wrin... Mon, 26 Jan 2015 21:54:31 EST break the binge habit http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5853165 Whatever else people think has to happen, there are basically two things people have to do: they have to have reasonable routines for eating, and they have to ignore the urges to binge. The two go hand in hand. If you don't have a routine in which your body knows you will get a reasonable amount of food in a few hours and it won't get food for a few hours, you will likely be plagued by the desire to eat quite often. (Most slim cultures do not eat frequently and they thrive quite well. They al... Tue, 13 Jan 2015 01:06:45 EST not meant to discourage, but- need to get real http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5837538 I am going to post a link to something that many may find discouraging. It shows that even when adhering to a diet, average weight loss is often quite low for all the effort put in, especially when figuring that most people won't stick to traditional diets for longer than six months. <BR> <BR> Why do I show this? Because reading very similar information more than ten years ago helped me get more realistic and, ironcially, more determined to find a viable solution to all the offered choices.... Tue, 23 Dec 2014 14:19:47 EST gene expression and exercise http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5835295 In my quest to inspire myself to exercise more consistently, I'm posting this link to an article about how the expression-not the chemical structure- of certain genes can be influenced by regular exercise. "Most of the genes in question are known to play a role in energy metabolism, insulin response and inflammation within muscles. In other words, they affect how healthy and fit our muscles — and bodies — become." Okay, like I don't know that exercise is good for me. <link>well.blogs.nytime... Fri, 19 Dec 2014 08:09:13 EST from a recent Beck newsletter http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5809438 Reducing my random eating to almost nil- meaning leaving the door open so that it's not fanatical- has been instrumental in the continuing journey to cutting my ties with food. So I cherry pick the connections! Even though I very much don't agree with Beck's emphasis on calorie counting and a few other strategies, I do like this newsletter message. This is from Aug. 19, 2014. <BR> <BR> <BR> In an article published in the Journal of Internal Medicine entitled, "The Epidemiology of Obesity... Sun, 2 Nov 2014 15:49:24 EST tiny house, messy garage, and not bingeing http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5796857 This is a post I decided was too long for the 21-day streak on Living Binge Free. I'm also repeating myself to some degree, but I know I need the same message most days. <BR> <BR> For various reasons, I've been very sporadic in posting, though I have been continuing my quest. From what I have been reading lately about habit formation in general and "addictive" habits in particular, I have just one thing to emphasize today: a person can be learning how to live with food differently permanentl... Sun, 12 Oct 2014 13:51:21 EST kindness & general update http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5792220 I've been reading a book on how families can be supportive of other members who are addicted to a substance. The research shows over and over that kindness and cooperation with any little move towards new alternate behaviors, not guilt-inducing rants or ultimatums, works. Giving up addictive substances is not actually usually done cold turkey. Making the person think and feel that she is not acceptable or lovable as is or as she goes through the ups and downs of changing does not allow for th... Sat, 4 Oct 2014 11:26:13 EST the barely bearable lightness of not bingeing http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5741193 This is in response to a member on the Living Binge Free team, who has had just a few binges in two years. Her record is a bit better than mine, but I feel I've done well in these four + years and a 40-lb. loss. It seems some days she is still just stepping by feel. She said, "It is not about the food or some special combination of behaviours that someone wrote in a book. Rather it is about me learning how to live peacefully with myself and my environment. " <BR> <BR> Bingeing is a door in... Fri, 18 Jul 2014 02:56:02 EST refusing to binge decreases the urges OVER TIME http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5732662 I had seen research that supported this idea years ago, but had not ever written it down. This is not the original information but it supports it just the same. (I put this up because so many people feel afraid to say no to binges, thinking it will make them feel deprived. Well, it WILL, until the cycle runs its course. Hang on through its course! Besides, when you binge, you deprive yourself of feeling comfortable in your body.) <BR> <BR> In the book "The Skeptic's Guide to the MInd," (yea... Sat, 5 Jul 2014 18:39:36 EST on the passing of a colleague http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5730652 I am very sobered by news of the passing of a colleague because, frankly, though heartbroken, I am not surprised. She joked for years that her doctor told her to eat better quality food, cut down on coffee, get exercise, etc, for high blood pressure and diabetes. She was even hospitalized for some small event on spring break. I worried for her, but she brushed it off. She would say she got headaches if she didn't drink coffee, and had to eat often because of diabetes. But you can even eat of... Wed, 2 Jul 2014 14:36:35 EST again, weight loss can't heal an eating disorder http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5729167 For anyone who needs to hear it, know that being binge free is its own reward. Any day that I can live WITH food without gorging or permasnacking, and without hinging high self-regard to eating, is a victorious day, no matter what the scale says. What if I am binge free, eating sanely for today, and I don't lose? Are my habits a failure? I am not on a diet. I am eating and living. The scale is always secondary when I am trying to heal from an eating disorder. My weight does not define me. ... Mon, 30 Jun 2014 15:19:15 EST rather catty and superficial, but http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5682006 I went for a walk with two colleagues during lunch up behind the conference center, which is in a rather open area of chapparal. We followed a fire road and were gabbing, missed a turn, and didn't realize it until we were pretty far afield. My anxiety kicked in, boy. I ended up jogging ahead because I was feeling I really needed to be back at the workshop. I am less familiar with the topic than my colleagues and I"m going to have to produce a portfolio of 12 items. I can't prove my being ther... Sun, 27 Apr 2014 23:37:43 EST Can we really see our bodies as they are? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5583036 In response to a blog in which a woman realized that she felt as fat 40 lbs. ago as she does now. She didn't know she was slim! <BR> <BR> <BR> Media images really do a number on our brains. We were all bombarded with images of very thin women, and still are. It definitely affects our expectations of ourselves. <BR> <BR> I weigh the same now as when I graduated from high school, but then I thought I was fat. I thought I HAD to lose 20 lbs. Now, it was true that many of my peers WERE actual... Sun, 5 Jan 2014 13:34:38 EST Oh, the burden of not being agreed with- rant alert http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5582221 Well, SO funny. I had a person come over for lunch yesterday to talk about eating issues because he saw me at the New Year’s Day brunch and noticed that I’d lost weight. He did some really restricted program a few years ago, and I remember thinking at the time, (I saw him at a similar event) hmm, I’ll be surprised if this works for him. I had lost about half my weight at that point, but said nothing because he didn’t ask. He was all excited at that time—in the honeymoon stage, as the research... Sat, 4 Jan 2014 19:34:25 EST I think I love this woman http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5569396 <link>abcnews.go.com/GMA/video/Australian-<BR>mom-lashes-back-fit-mom-21244555 </link> <BR> <BR> I mean the "realistic" mom. Thanks to Christa! <BR> <BR> Sat, 21 Dec 2013 16:30:59 EST If you fear obesity http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5526969 Just listening to a program on University of California, San Diego TV. It's being presented by a specialist on obesity and he just said a couple of things I already know. One is that exercise is effective for treating metabolic/cardio problems in obese patients even though they may not lose any weight, which is convenient because exercise is actually only marginally successful at getting the body to lose weight. The other is that if an obese person does not have obesity-related health problem... Tue, 29 Oct 2013 23:46:27 EST Back to high school weight http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5492784 Well, I'm here to report my quarterly weigh-in. I am now officially a bit below my high school graduation weight, BMI 23.8. I have not been here for 25 years, which was a little more than 15 years after high school. So, since my turnaround around New Year's of 2010, I've lost 22% of my weight. I'm turning 60 in 4 days. It is a nice reward for sticking to my guns of paying more attention to hunger and satiety + mostly regular meal times rather than the almighty calorie and scale. This is just... Sun, 22 Sep 2013 12:59:19 EST This bears repeating... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5486293 In answer to a blog in which the poster linked another blog on which the blogger said that compulsive overeaters are stymied by using weight loss as their motivation, here is my response. <BR> <BR> I don't mean to whine, but I've said this many times. Using weight loss and thinness, rather than mental and physical stability, as the incentive when it's just plain thinness someone wants has been a miserable failure at helping people learn to eat less permanently. This si not my opinion. Thi... Sun, 15 Sep 2013 14:35:54 EST A deeper look at breakfast http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5486240 When I greatly reduced my bingeing, thus eating dinner but not doing any night eating, I found I was often hungry for breakfast and ate it gladly. As the years have gone on, my appetite for breakfast has decreased as has my overall appetite. On weekdays, since I don't have a lot of choice over my time to eat, and I like to take my time and not rush through a meal during a 10-minute break, I have something small, and it's enough, along with a latte break, until lunch. <BR> <BR> On weekends,... Sun, 15 Sep 2013 13:28:06 EST Use that prefrontal cortex! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5466547 We know that deep, instinctual parts of the brain are stimulated by even the sight of highly palatable foods, making our bodies produce feelings and thoughts that ask us for the food. But did you also know that in weight loss maintainers who have consistently been choosing to eat in a moderate way, the prefrontal cortex, where rational decision-making is done. also gets stimulated at the same time? This can happen even when the person is not actively thinking about restraint. This can become... Mon, 26 Aug 2013 09:06:06 EST moderation or complete abstinence? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5425459 I know I will be criticized by some for posting this because I do not have at the ready the research that led me to the conclusions I've written about here. So be it. I came across those foundational ideas over the course of years and I didn't document it anywhere but in my memory; not much in the interim has proved me wrong, except for exceptions. If this resonates with you, I'm glad and hope you will take the next step. If not, truly I encourage you to stay where you feel supported and enr... Thu, 18 Jul 2013 14:23:19 EST stopping mid-binge http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5423994 You are talking about a very tricky skill here. It is the most advanced skill for a binger to learn. Most bingers get a lot better at just not taking the first bite or at not beating themselves up afterwards first. It also helps to start practicing slowing down eating when just eating regular meals. When a binger gets better at these and it sinks in that she is making these choices, she can imagine and even act on stopping mid-binge. This probably takes at least a year of practice, not a few ... Wed, 17 Jul 2013 09:52:37 EST surprise in the Foreman grill http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5416221 Part of my lunch was half a leftover pork chile verde burrito plus freggies. For some reason, half of that half didn't heat evenly, so I cut it in half and left part of it in the grill to stay warm. Got rushed after lunch in returning phone calls, picking up my car from the repair shop and taking it to another shop for a bid on the rest of the work to be done on it. Anyhoo, when I went to have dinner, I discovered the unfinished burrito and realized that though I had felt a little light right... Wed, 10 Jul 2013 01:41:37 EST eat less often http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5402366 Of course, the devil can quote scriptures for his purposes, but here is a link <BR> <link>www.today.com/health/two-meals-day-m<BR>ay-be-better-weight-loss-grazing-6C104<BR>23982 </link> <BR> <BR> to a report about the value of eating less often, which I committed to nearly 42 months ago and which has been instrumental in helping me tame my binge habit. This study was looking at people who ate two "larger" meals a day, breakfast and lunch. I am NOT advocating that, as I believe if an eati... Wed, 26 Jun 2013 11:52:38 EST quarterly weigh in and false idols http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5400169 Since I reached my normal BMI range 15 months ago, I weigh only quarterly, weighing for one week at a time and averaging the weight of the seven days. The truth is that I gained 2.5 pounds since my spring weigh-in. There, I said it. I know how it happened. Before my spring weigh in, I was eating very little, not on purpose, exactly, but as an experiment of going with my hunger. When I saw my weight loss, my thoughts went crazy. I started planning secretly for even more weight loss, fantasizin... Mon, 24 Jun 2013 12:06:31 EST hungry after dinner? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5382456 I started to post this on a thread but decided to make it a blog. It was a belated answer to someone who had posted that she was feeling hungry at 9 p.m. and never knew what to eat. <BR> <BR> My first suggestion after 38 years of trial and error for what to eat when you feel hungry at 9 p.m.(after having a dinner) is nothing. It's not likely to be real hunger, meaning an empty stomach and pressing need for food, and therefore should not be reinforced with food at odd times. It's just the ha... Sat, 8 Jun 2013 13:08:58 EST rocking the boat http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5381988 I know this may seem heretical to post this link on a site such as Spark because it's about fat acceptance, but I believe it has some valuable lessons about not using food and eating to keep us from realizing there's a lot to life beyond this pursuit. I have had much better compliance with a plan not to binge since I made that my focus rather than losing weight. I'm still working on life in between my wonderful meals. I haven't been a complete wallflower, but I've held back in some areas and ... Fri, 7 Jun 2013 23:24:50 EST A mostly finger-food day http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5298244 I had a day of mostly snacking, but okay snacking. I had to shop during lunchtime for a finger food to take to a potluck in the evening. I was out of town with meetings morning and afternoon. I also had to shop for a couple of small gifts during the time I had for lunch and I opted to take more time for the shopping than the eating. I ended up lunching on product tastes at Costco. The quality of the items was quite good! Really good bread, cheeses, Angus burger, and two bites of sweets. I d... Sun, 24 Mar 2013 13:13:43 EST 3-year weight chart- gradual and sustainable loss http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5295272 live_amazingly let me know the link I had put up to my weight chart will just take members to their own charts, so I will alter this blog. <BR> <BR> I started the most recent phase of my journey officially on Jan. 1, 2010, though it was really on Dec. 26, 5 days before. I now record my weight only quarterly, and did that today. I took the opportunity to use the feature that allows me to see the loss graphically. I don't know how to show it to others, but those who are not having plummeting ... Thu, 21 Mar 2013 17:01:32 EST help from Volumetrics http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5289822 Reading the book Volumetrics was instrumental in my being able to make long-term changes to my eating, but it didn't show up until years later. I adopted many of the habits even while I continued to binge on many dense foods. Eventually, I committed to ending the binging, and the meal habit of including a fair amount of water-rich foods was already in place. Plus, I think years of eating less processed foods has finally tipped the "scale" in terms of my actually preferring to eat relatively s... Sun, 17 Mar 2013 12:25:02 EST Thank goodness for high food prices! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5283030 A couple of foods I used to binge on were containers of whipped chocolate frosting and packages of chocolate chip cookie dough. I'd buy them and start eating them in the car on the way home. I used to think that if I were in a car accident, rescuers might believe the accident opened the packages, but wouldn't they wonder where all the dough and frosting were? <BR> <BR> Anyway, I adopted an eating wonderful, reasonable plan a few years ago and have pretty much weaned myself off bingeing. Sti... Mon, 11 Mar 2013 20:34:02 EST Deprivation ain't what it used to be... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5169560 I've changed my concept of what deprivation is. It can be deprivation to be too full all the time and hung over with eating. I don't want to deprive myself of reasonable hunger and the light and vital feeling that accompanies not overeating. In other words, nowadays, it has become more important not to deprive myself 1) of the pleasure of eating when I'm actually hungry rather than permasnacking, 2) of feeling comfortable and even lively in my body instead of overloaded, 3) of the peace I get... Mon, 17 Dec 2012 22:07:00 EST Are you fostering an eating disorder in your daughter? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5166880 Dealing with children and eating is a very touchy issue. <BR> <BR> "Parents play a detrimental role when they create an environment which emphasizes thinness and dieting or excessive exercise as a way to attain the desired body." <BR> <BR> "Daughter's concern about being or getting too fat was related to mother's complaints about her own weight as well as mother's comments about daughter's weight." both quotations from Children and Eating Disorders:A Review of the Literature by Emily Majo... Fri, 14 Dec 2012 22:51:38 EST Keeping treats "treats" http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5162575 Until recent times, treats for Christmas were limited to just a few days. People just didn't have access to so much sugar and the other ingredients needed. Treats were often a lot more work, too. This made them true "treats." I suggest people thoughtfully consider just how many times this season they should eat treats to get the effect of REALLY being treated. I find that when I do attend events more often, I can feel very "treated" even if I don't have sweets by slowly savoring the other wo... Mon, 10 Dec 2012 20:53:17 EST scary" scale? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5091130 In response to a question on a maintainers' team about whether members felt the scale was "scary," one person said not scary, but that she had a love/hate relationship with the scale. I'm not sure what the difference is. Why are people afraid of the scale? Or hate the scale? This is a response I wrote that I decided was too long and too controversial for the thread. You have to know from the beginning that the fact that many long term weight loss maintainers (not necessarily on this team, bu... Mon, 8 Oct 2012 10:33:10 EST eating right doesn't solve all my problems http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5073838 Am having some stress because I forgot to renew my driver's license. It will expire Wednesday and I have to fly back to California on Saturday. The airport security will absolutely not allow me on a plane with an expired driver's license. I have been trying all day to renew online and have just been hitting cyber walls. I follow the directions but it doesn't work. The online link sent me in an email doesn't work. I also was given a phone number to use and it was busy every time I called. I a... Tue, 25 Sep 2012 00:56:33 EST regarding shame- in response to another blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5061709 I wrote a long response and realized most of the message needed to be directed to myself, not so much these days in terms of weight, but of other "transgression." But I'll keep it as is for the purposes of Spark. <BR> <BR> May I gently say that your biggest problem is not your weight or your eating but your shame and lack of self-forgiveness about it. I don't believe you deserve this burden. But in our culture there is such a burden of perfection placed on people and the expectation that the... Sun, 16 Sep 2012 14:48:22 EST Is a goal weight really necessary? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5060755 I see over and over again people say they struggle with maintaining a certain goal weight. I can't help but think that having the weight be the center of the effort is a big part of the problem. There are many voices that reinforce using that center. There is a huge industry, more than one actually, to whose benefit it is to have the finish line be very hard to reach. They talk a big streak, and may even be sincere in thinking that it really is also in your best interest to "support "you in d... Sat, 15 Sep 2012 19:14:40 EST rough day at work http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5025537 I almost cried at work today. I felt like I am wasting my life and energy. I earned honors at school but knowledge is not honored by teenagers! But I also felt a sense of shame that I have never been able to find work that suits me better. <BR> <BR> I had that kind of frantic thought that I just have to be able to quit my job (high school teacher)but I know I won't. Kids really resent that I try to keep order in class and that I insist on them actually trying to understand the material. I'm... Tue, 21 Aug 2012 21:47:38 EST