NEWMOON's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=NEWMOON NEWMOON's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Checking in again - http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5931394 The intestinal plague is starting to go away. I still can't predict what's going to happen after I eat, but at least not EVERY meal results in a mad dash to the "powder room". <BR> <BR> Because the plague wasn't bad enough, I'm also dealing with some peri-menopause stuff, that is best left at that and not described. <BR> <BR> I'm physically exhausted, which is "funny" because I already have CFS. Just when you think you can't BE more tired... <BR> <BR> I wish I had something positive a... Wed, 20 May 2015 12:15:09 EST Checking in - still sick :( http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5928718 Just wanted to say thanks to everyone for well wishes. <BR> <BR> Still have the intestinal mayhem. <BR> <BR> Wishing everyone a healthy weekend. Fri, 15 May 2015 15:25:18 EST ugh. Sick. :( http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5927039 i have some nasty intestinal thing and I just wanted to post in case someone wonders where I am. I'll be back. :) Tue, 12 May 2015 15:34:51 EST I'm so hungry. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5924954 And so what? <BR> <BR> It's not like I haven't had any food today. I know there are people in our world that eat less in a week than I ate today. So far! <BR> <BR> How spoiled am I? My stomach growls, therefore I must put something in it? I'll have my dinner in about an hour. Fresh asparagus, roasted new potatoes, crab cakes baked in the oven. I am so very fortunate. I had eggs for breakfast, a great salad with chicken for lunch, fresh fruit. Some people in this world will never... Fri, 8 May 2015 18:26:41 EST Tool Box for Recovery - let's dust off this bad boy and take a look, shall we? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5924205 I think it's time to open this up and pull out anything and everything I need to get back on the path to health. <BR> <BR> All of these things helped me in the past. When I am at my lowest and darkest, I have a hard time believing that anything will help me. I lose hope, temporarily, and while I know it will eventually pass, in those moments I simply don't see it. <BR> <BR> I'm grateful for a new day. I'm thankful for the friends I have here, who refuse to give up on me. I'm happy tha... Thu, 7 May 2015 10:26:59 EST Why can't I stop? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5920869 I just don't get it. Years of this. YEARS. Therapy weekly, medication. <BR> <BR> I am killing myself with food. No reason to sugarcoat it (no pun intended). I read that and I "know" it's truw, and I hear it, but it somehow doesn't sink in. Do I truly not care about what happens to me? I find it so hard to believe. Yet, it is a fact. I'm over 50, got Type 2 diabetes in 2005, and clock in at about 430 lbs today. <BR> <BR> Where is the disconnect? I'm not a bad person. I certainl... Fri, 1 May 2015 14:56:34 EST So much easier to stick with it when I stick with it. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5917495 Yeah, that makes no sense LOL. Or it's a keen insight to the obvious. BUT, I have noticed over these many years that if I don't eat The Usual Suspects, the struggle is much less difficult than when I have an "allowable" amount of sugar/simple carbs. <BR> <BR> Everyone is different and it's clear that some people can incorporate every type of food into their meals and lose weight. <BR> <BR> But, if I do that, the part of my brain that craves a binge, wakes up and starts screaming for mor... Sat, 25 Apr 2015 14:18:33 EST Newmoon's FULL FIGURE FABULOUS FASHION FRIDAY! PART ONE http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5916987 OK, I'm not promoting or even listing websites for these clothes. If you want to know where they're from, all you need to do is a search on the common plus-size websites and you will find them. I am not affiliated with any of the companies. I just love clothing and I think we all deserve to look as fabulous on the outside as we are on the inside. <BR> <BR> Today, I'm focusing on the Maxi-Dress. I'm so so so glad that they are in style. I have lymphodema, which causes my legs to swell ... Fri, 24 Apr 2015 12:43:04 EST Sugar and "simple" carbs are Satan's Snacks LOL http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5916861 First of all, HI AGAIN! I keep coming back here. You can't get rid of me! :) <BR> <BR> I posted some time ago about how I discovered the major impact sugar and processed carbs have on my emotions. As I get older, and my hormones do all kinds of wacky zany stuff, I find that if I consume any quantity of white bread or pasta, or something like a scone or a cupcake, all Hell breaks loose. I will hit rock bottom emotionally, and cry uncontrollably. And then there's the uber-grouchiness, li... Fri, 24 Apr 2015 09:16:40 EST Still trying. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5910456 After a few weeks of weight watchers, I starting gaining. I was extremely disgusted and sort of gave up. <BR> <BR> I had an appt to see my Dr last week and we talked about the point allowance that was assigned and it's obviously too high. I think I am much more sedentary than whatever is built into the WW calculations. <BR> <BR> Also, my Dr, prescribed a medication for Binge Eating Disorder, called Vyvanse. My insurance company won't release it without a bunch of stuff from the Dr. s... Mon, 13 Apr 2015 10:39:11 EST One week of WW http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5891258 I lost 7 pounds in the 8 days since I decided to start WW (again). <BR> <BR> Their Points Plus system is different from what I did with them before, and it's been so long since I officially signed up that it's taken some adjusting (what? I don't use calories?), but I'm getting in the groove. <BR> <BR> If you're reading this and you're in your 20's, 30's and 40's, LOSE YOUR WEIGHT NOW. <BR> <BR> Trust me, the older you get, the harder the weight sticks. I mean, this stuff does NOT wan... Wed, 11 Mar 2015 17:32:53 EST Carbs and depression http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5889350 I've noticed that carbs have a huge impact on my mood lately. <BR> <BR> I know the nutritional info and how carbs metabolize, so it makes sense, BUT lately their impact is really drastic. <BR> <BR> For example, I had some pumpernickel bread for lunch today. Here I am, an hour or so later, crying because I read a sad post on another message board about someone having to have their dog put down. <BR> <BR> I felt fine until just recently. Nothing in my life is happening to cause this sad... Sun, 8 Mar 2015 17:05:17 EST "Are my friends and family making me fat?" Warning: Mini-Rant http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5888072 I think maybe it's the full moon, but everything is irritating me today. <BR> <BR> This article is here on Spark: <BR> <link>www.sparkpeople.com/resource/nutriti<BR>on_articles.asp?id=909 </link> <BR> <BR> I haven't read it, because of the whole easily-irritated thing going on, and I'm sure it's well-meant and helpful, like pretty much everything on Spark. <BR> <BR> BUT <BR> <BR> No one is making us fat. Unless we are strapped down and food is being rammed down our throats, we're d... Fri, 6 Mar 2015 10:58:27 EST A letter to me, from me http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5887413 Dear Me, <BR> I know you're in there and I want to take this time to tell you that I am trying so very hard to do what I have to, to get you out. <BR> <BR> You are yearning to have your life back, I know. You dream of walking the streets of NYC, of New Orleans, of Philadelphia again. Your heart hurts to look at pictures and know that your physical body is in such poor shape that all you can do is WISH you were there and remember how happy it made you. <BR> <BR> I know how much you wan... Thu, 5 Mar 2015 09:55:11 EST Starting WW Online tomorrow - Need a reboot http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5886496 I just signed up for WW online. I start tomorrow. I have been trying to do this on my own and I need more structure and discipline right now. <BR> <BR> I've done WW several times before, so it's nothing I don't already know. BUT, tracking points instead of calories, etc. will give my brain the change it needs to switch things up. <BR> <BR> I wish with all my heart that I could afford to go back to the facility in NC. I hate that only the reasonably well-off can afford a place that k... Tue, 3 Mar 2015 21:32:41 EST Oh, yeah, it's back. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5876618 About a week ago, I woke up and the hideous food addiction/binge eating disorder, or whatever you want to call it, was gone. <BR> <BR> And it stayed gone. <BR> <BR> Until Saturday afternoon. It came back in a big whoosh and I was so disappointed that I cried. <BR> <BR> Having that time without it constantly in my head was like being freed from prison. If anyone knows what B.E.D/food addiction feels like, it is like having some creature inside you, poking at you almost constantly. Wh... Mon, 16 Feb 2015 09:00:26 EST So, let's go shopping for dresses. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5871297 OK, here are the dresses that come in 8X. <BR> <BR> Knowing that I am 5'7", 417, and have almost no "bosom", I feel pretty certain I need to stick to the A-Line, and probably go with the Empire Waist. I want to avoid "shiny" fabric, because it catches light and shadow and makes you look even bigger than you are. <BR> <BR> All of these dresses come with a matching shawl, which I will convert to a jacket, using a spiffy trick I saw on youtube. These upper arms will NOT be out and about fo... Sat, 7 Feb 2015 14:12:52 EST Waking up without Food Addiction http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5871173 I woke up just a bit ago and something is missing. The thoughts of food. The wanting to eat for the sake of eating. Gone. I'm sitting here, stunned. Don't get me wrong, I'm not looking a gift horse in the mouth. But, it's as if someone waved a magic wand and **POOF**, it's gone. <BR> <BR> I am no fool, and I am not allowing myself to think that whatever is in my brain that flipped that switch on, somehow shifted, and turned that switch off permanently. <BR> <BR> BUT, I am going to... Sat, 7 Feb 2015 10:29:55 EST Angry today and don't want to be HANGRY today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5870019 I'm blogging right now in an attempt to avoid turning anger into Hanger (hungry anger). <BR> <BR> I just read a headline where another company was hacked and 80 million people have that their personal info stolen. It's a healthcare company, and you can find it online if you want the specifics. <BR> <BR> My husband's info was used last year to file a fraudulent tax return with the IRS. We didn't even know until I tried to file our tax return and it was rejected. This has happened to a... Thu, 5 Feb 2015 11:29:06 EST Dresses up to 8X! Huzzah! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5868792 First off, if I haven't thanked you yet... <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/5/l1594725785.jpg"> <BR> <BR> For your support, for your ideas, etc. <BR> <BR> I found several sites and an ebay seller that sell beautiful formal dresses up to 6x. <BR> <BR> I found TWO sites that sell beautiful formal dresses up to 8X. Actually one of them has only one dress that big, but it's beautiful. <BR> <BR> The other site has quite a variety of formal dresses up to 8X. Since I... Tue, 3 Feb 2015 16:07:30 EST Too big for a pretty dress? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5866054 In the continuing saga of trying to find a fancy-schmancy dress for not one, but TWO fancy-schmancy weddings... <BR> <BR> I found several dresses on a site called jjshouse. They have an option to have the dresses made custom, so I got five kinds of excited. <BR> <BR> When you select "Custom Size", a bunch of drop-down boxes open and you enter your measurements. HOWEVER...the maximum measurement for Bust, Waist, and Hips is all 63", <BR> <BR> My hips are outside of the 63" range. <BR> ... Fri, 30 Jan 2015 17:06:53 EST Missing important lifetime moments due to weight http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5864679 I'm writing this because I need to get it out. <BR> <BR> My husband's Brother and Sister are both getting married this year. NOT to each other. <BR> <BR> His brother's wedding is in April. My husband is a groomsman. The reception is being held in a gorgeous historical venue, complete with a painting by my favorite artist. The wedding and the reception are both going to be like a dream-come-true. <BR> <BR> When his brother announced the date, a year ago, I was determined to lose e... Wed, 28 Jan 2015 18:06:26 EST Today is all that matters http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5864634 Trying so hard to stay in the present. Trying even harder to keep the hounds at bay. <BR> <BR> The hounds = the overwhelming all-consuming torturous urges to eat for comfort, taste, pleasure, stress... <BR> <BR> Realized today how blasted long I've been in the 400's and this foolishness has to stop. <BR> <BR> I don't remember when I was in the 300's, but I need to get there and stay there, until I hit the 200's. <BR> <BR> I wish people knew what this is like. Many people don't unde... Wed, 28 Jan 2015 16:33:32 EST Diet Rage - HULK SMASH :) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5763766 GRRRRRR. I have PMS and I want chocolate and salty crunchy things and then more chocolate. Chocolate-covered salty crunchy things. <BR> <BR> So, I'm sitting here, trying to be all Zen about it, talking to myself about what I want more...to be healthy, to have mobility, to travel again...and then the food addict in me says "EFF THAT! All you have is today, and today I want PLEASURE and you know how good it all tastes. Why are you depriving yourself of something that makes you happy?" <B... Wed, 20 Aug 2014 18:46:59 EST My current "intentional activity" plan http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5763066 Going from completely sedentary to doing some kind of "intentional activity" (I can't use the word exercise without wanting to hide somewhere) is a challenge. <BR> <BR> I have never enjoyed doing it for the sake of doing it. When I was active and healthy, I played tennis, walked everywhere, rode a bike, rode horses, went dancing, etc. My physical activity was FUN. <BR> <BR> Until I weigh less and can move easier, I've come up with my own personal plan that is DOABLE. Some people might ... Tue, 19 Aug 2014 17:37:49 EST Tool Box for Recovery - Added 10 and 11 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5761962 These are the things that have helped me with recovery from compulsive eating. <BR> <BR> I'll repost it when I add to it. <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/0/l50950882.jpg"> <BR> <BR> 1. Write about it. Blog, journal, whatever. Get it out there for accountability, for support, for the sake of speaking it and not holding it in. <BR> <BR> 2. Music. If you already have an emotion identified that's causing the urge, pick something that either matches it, or will c... Mon, 18 Aug 2014 08:55:05 EST Tool Box for Recovery - Revisted http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5761421 Time to revisit and update my Tool Box. <BR> <BR> These are the things that have helped me with recovery from compulsive eating. <BR> <BR> I'll repost it when I add to it. <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/9/l593982152.jpg"> <BR> <BR> 1. Write about it. Blog, journal, whatever. Get it out there for accountability, for support, for the sake of speaking it and not holding it in. <BR> <BR> 2. Music. If you already have an emotion identified that's causing the ... Sun, 17 Aug 2014 12:29:47 EST Plus ca change, plus c'est la meme chose http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5761302 The more things change, the more they stay the same. <BR> <BR> And so it goes. <BR> <BR> In the almost 4 months I've been gone, I've lost weight and gained weight. I've been in a hole of panic, anxiety, and depression. <BR> <BR> I've stuck to a healthy eating plan for a few weeks, and then something extremely stressful happens, and I stress-eat. <BR> <BR> I've been losing and gaining the same 20 pounds literally for years now. <BR> <BR> I know what needs to be done. <BR> <BR>... Sun, 17 Aug 2014 08:58:39 EST Where I've been and where I'll be http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5682259 First of all, thank all of you who have been checking in on my page. Your concern and support mean the world to me. <BR> <BR> Here's what's going on. <BR> <BR> When I filed our Federal Income Tax (online), the IRS rejected it, and after talking to them, I found out that someone used my name, date of birth, and social security info to file a fraudulent tax return (based on some imaginary job/income) in order to receive a fraudulent refund from the IRS. <BR> <BR> I've since learned that in... Mon, 28 Apr 2014 10:12:34 EST Time to stop borking around http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5667332 " 'Borking' is not a word", you say? Feel free to insert your favorite. <BR> <BR> While I haven't been free-range binge eating, I started doing the math in my head instead of tracking, making less-than healthy choices for a meal here and there, and getting sloppy with just about everything. <BR> <BR> All a recipe for disaster. <BR> <BR> So, time to get serious again, and do what I know works. Track my food, count the calories, watch the sodium, plan meals, cook pretty much everythi... Tue, 8 Apr 2014 11:33:18 EST April 8 through April 14-Orange/Yellow Fr/Veg Challenge http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5666682 NOTE: If you copy/paste this somewhere else, please be kind enough to give me credit. I worked many hours to gather the nutritional info and to put this list together, and it is original work. Thanks! <BR> <BR> Here are the rules: <BR> 1. You eat a min of 3 different Orange/Yellow fruit/veg during the week of 4/8-4/14 <BR> 2. You eat a min of 1 Orange/Yellow fruit/veg daily. <BR> 3. You eat a min of 5 fruit/veg daily (including your daily Orange/Yellow fruit/veg). <BR> 4. Blog about it (opti... Mon, 7 Apr 2014 16:18:40 EST Week one Eat a Rainbow results http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5666472 I ate at least one purple/blue fruit of veg a day. <BR> I ate at least 5 servings of fruit/veg a day. <BR> The purple/blue fr/veg I ate this week: <BR> Blueberries <BR> Eggplant <BR> Purple Cabbage <BR> Purple Onion <BR> <BR> YAY <BR> <BR> <em>242</em> <em>277</em> <em>242</em> <em>284</em> <em>242</em> Mon, 7 Apr 2014 11:45:52 EST April 1 through April 7 - Purple/Blue Fruit/Veg http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5658492 NOTE: If you copy/paste this somewhere else, please be kind enough to give me credit. I worked many hours to gather the nutritional info and to put this list together, and it is original work. Thanks! <BR> <BR> <BR> Here are the rules: <BR> 1. You eat a min of 3 different Purple/Blue fruit/veg during the week of 4/1-4/7 <BR> 2. You eat a min of 1 Purple/Blue fruit/veg daily. <BR> 3. You eat a min of 5 fruit/veg daily (including your daily Purple/Blue fruit/veg). <BR> 4. Blog about it (... Fri, 28 Mar 2014 10:08:58 EST Here is the Challenge, should you accept it... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5658466 I developed this Challenge for the Chair Exercise Team, but if you want to join me, go for it. <BR> <BR> Just make sure you give me credit for, OK? No stealing it and posting it on a team somewhere without saying where it came from! Yes? Yes. I spent many hours on researching this, so R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Thank you! <BR> <em>334</em> <BR> <BR> Every week in April, you focus on a specific color family of Fruit/Veg. <BR> <BR> Green is a gimme, since we're all probably getting green veg o... Fri, 28 Mar 2014 09:37:57 EST "I'm going off the rails on a crazy train" http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5656269 Yep, that was me for about the last week. Not tracking my food, not counting calories, and eating whatever I wanted. <BR> <BR> I made those choices consciously. I knew when I had the sub, fries, pizza, etc., that the food wasn't healthy for me. <BR> <BR> I have lots of reasons, no need to list them. <BR> <BR> The bottom line is that I need to take myself by the hand and guide myself back on track. <BR> <BR> Had a healthy bfast and lunch, and the food is tracked. Need to figure out dinner,... Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:06:53 EST Moving forward http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5651527 So, between TOM and then an intestinal virus, my food choices have not been the wisest and I just noticed that I haven't tracked my food since the 12th. <BR> <BR> While I have not been binge-eating or emotional eating, my meals have not been the healthiest. <BR> <BR> Moving forward. <BR> <BR> The past is gone and there's no need to look backward. All I have is this moment, and the choice is mine. <BR> <BR> Today, I will track. Today, I will choose healthier options for my meals. ... Wed, 19 Mar 2014 11:44:46 EST COOTIES! I got 'em! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5647640 Intestinal, that is. <BR> <BR> Yesterday was ugly. No one needs the details. <BR> <em>40</em> <BR> <BR> Not tons better today, but I think the worst is over. <BR> <BR> Going to spend today recuperating and hydrating. <BR> <BR> Much love to all you wonderful SparkFriends for your ongoing support. <BR> <BR> Keep rockin' it! <BR> <em>252</em> <BR> <BR> <BR> Fri, 14 Mar 2014 10:27:45 EST I can barely stand myself right now LOL http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5646312 I'm so grouchy from hormones that it's almost funny. ALMOST. <BR> <BR> I'm struggling with wanting to eat everything that's not tied down. <BR> <BR> I won't do it, but I really really really want to. <BR> <BR> I'm distracting myself by watching old episodes of Project Runway through my Roku, so there are very few commercials, and fortunately none have been food-related. <BR> <BR> Tim Gunn is comforting to me. So is really bad fashion. <BR> <BR> So, I'm curled up under a soft ... Wed, 12 Mar 2014 16:00:12 EST Mini Rant http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5645325 This has been working my last nerve: <BR> <BR> Since Jan 29 2014 I have been on this site somewhere every single day. <BR> <BR> BUT...if I don't spin the stinkin' wheel, it's as if I wasn't here. <BR> <BR> I logged my food, blogged here, posted on someone's page, answered sparkmail,and/or any combination of things, BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. <BR> <BR> One day without spinning the &*&$#($#&#@ wheel, and I lose CONSISTENCY???? <BR> <BR> I have more important things to do here than worry ... Tue, 11 Mar 2014 12:03:47 EST Feeling grouchy, resentful, etc. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5644522 I know it's mostly hormones, but my attitude is just plain horrible today. <BR> <BR> Yesterday we had no internet, which was fine, but no blog post here from me, which kind of threw me a little off track. <BR> <BR> I don't know why it should bother me that I couldn't post. Probably that all-or-nothing thing I'm cursed with. <BR> <BR> Regardless, in spite of having a bunch of negative feelings like frustration and anger, I didn't eat from it all, so that's good news. <BR> <BR> I th... Mon, 10 Mar 2014 13:47:13 EST Blurgghh. Feeling sick, but somehow glad about it. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5642377 Had a light breakfast and thanks to losing track of time, lunch came and went, and I had a bunch of calories left for today. <BR> <BR> I haven't had ribs in a long time. Had the calories for them, so why not? <BR> <BR> They're sitting in my stomach like a rock. When I think about them now, I'm legitimately disgusted. All the things I loved about them before, are just totally revolting now. <BR> <BR> SO, I sit here, feeling ill. <BR> <BR> But, I'm glad because it means that my bo... Fri, 7 Mar 2014 18:31:59 EST This is my blog for March 6th - Moderation? Wasssat? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5641910 Yep, had the darn thing all typed up, got distracted and never hit the "post blog entry" button. <BR> <BR> Filling in for the leaders (TEMPORARILY!!) for The Chair Exercise Team happened for a reason. Actually more than one reason. I'm not a person who thinks every tiny thing that happens to me is the result of some Universal Event, BUT, I KNOW that some stuff lines up all at the right time, right place and whammo, you've got some learnin' to do. <BR> <BR> So, what are these lessons? ... Fri, 7 Mar 2014 07:56:34 EST Hectic Day! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5640021 I don't know what I expected from today when I woke up this morning, but somehow I'm now acting co-leader of the Chair Exercise Team. <BR> <BR> Helping out while the 2 leaders take a break for health reasons. <BR> <BR> I'm excited about it, but I have a lot of reading and catching up to do, as I have not yet started to exercise again, so I haven't been active on the team page. <BR> <BR> I DO know that it's an excellent place for support and information on getting a workout when faced wi... Wed, 5 Mar 2014 01:06:50 EST More stuff I learned that helps me http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5639025 Just some random thoughts as I get ready for bed at the end of day 33 without emo eating. <BR> <BR> > Learning to accept that people will act they way they act. I am learning to stop expecting people to do X if I do Y. It helps with feelings of disappointment and frustration, which are 2 big emo eating feelings for me. The less I feel disappointment and frustration, the less I have to battle the emo eating. <BR> <BR> > It's NOT about me. LOL, that's a hard one. Of COURSE it's ALL ... Mon, 3 Mar 2014 22:24:33 EST GAAAAHH ads are harshing my mellow! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5637883 All the ads here are making it next to impossible for me to navigate around the site. <BR> <BR> Yes, I know the ads are revenue to keep the site running, and I love this site, so yeah... <BR> <BR> BUT, it's to the point now that they're locking up my laptop and I'm getting so frustrated that it's almost to the point that I don't want to come in here anymore. <BR> <BR> ALSO...many of the ads are for FOOD, and it's not healthy food. Pizza, breadsticks, pasta, whatever from Pizza Hut or ... Sun, 2 Mar 2014 17:24:06 EST What I learned in 30 days of recovery from food addiction http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5636102 1. You have to have support. <BR> <BR> 2. You cannot always find/get support. <BR> <BR> Of course I learned much more than that, and I've blogged here about all of it. But, those 2 things stick out more than anything else. Maybe because that's what I personally need the most? <BR> <BR> This site is fabulous for support. There are so many wonderful people here who keep me going hour by hour. I honestly believe that I would not have 30 days behind me if it were not for the folks her... Fri, 28 Feb 2014 12:35:13 EST 29 days with no emo eating http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5634842 Thank you to everyone who reached out on my earlier post about loneliness. Just wanted to report that I made it through witbout eating. <BR> <BR> Special thanks to Reyafae for the friendship and support tonight. <BR> <BR> I hope you all truly know how special you are! Wed, 26 Feb 2014 23:23:18 EST Nope. Not going to emo eat from loneliness. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5634560 Feeling lonely right now and my addiction wants food for "comfort", but I know how my addiction lies. <BR> <BR> Any nano-second of enjoyment that comes from food is certainly not going to take away this feeling. If anything, a lot of the loneliness I'm feeling right now is due to emotional eating. My size restricts my mobility, and I've created a situation where it's difficult to so many of the things I used to do before the ME/CFS and subsequent emo eating weight gain of 200+ lbs. <BR>... Wed, 26 Feb 2014 16:54:21 EST A breakfast from around the world :) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5634396 Here are some pics (no instagram) of one of my breakfasts. <BR> <BR> USA (2 eggs) <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/7/8/l788793919.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Greece (yogurt) <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/2/l1220109867.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Mexico ("Mexican" cheese blend) <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/4/1/l413925073.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Thailand <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/1/l1111376944.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Take a moment to ... Wed, 26 Feb 2014 13:12:01 EST A sobering sight and a reminder to make each moment count - Warning: Sad http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5634242 I was on Facebook this morning and saw a pic posted by an old school friend. <BR> <BR> It was snow, but there was a patch of bare ground. It was where he found his dog last night, who had apparently been killed by a hit-and-run driver. The bare patch of ground was the silhouette of his dog. <BR> <BR> I immediately started to cry. I'm crying now. I haven't seen this person in 30 years and he lives out of state. <BR> <BR> That picture, with the dog-shaped bare patch of ground in t... Wed, 26 Feb 2014 10:36:05 EST