MRS.SIX's SparkPeople Blog MRS.SIX's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community I'm generally a pretty happy person. This is just how I've lived my life over the last couple years. I suffered greatly from bipolar disorder and major depression and decided one day to STOP. I do my best to control my own feelings. I suppose that seems like a random thing to write but as of late I have made a LOT of changes. Some of them aren't really connected to the whole eating way but then again maybe in a way they are. <BR> First and most importantly- I've decided to open my heart to the Lord. I was... Thu, 17 Mar 2011 19:55:10 EST wow so today I got on the scale and it read 200.8. At first I really thought- "well that CAN NOT BE RIGHT". I mean really- who the h e double hockey sticks loses over 10 lbs in a week? I mean really?? So I moved the scale. Several times. You know- sometimes the tiles tilt it or something. But it kept reading 200.8. It isn't that I'm not happy about this- actually thrilled is a more accurate word. It just doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Is it possible that I was really just eating that much bef... Thu, 13 Jan 2011 08:27:58 EST very excited because today I got on the scale and it said 202. That I'm excited by that when I had at one point gotten myself to 170 is a tad sad however this has been a long journey and I guess you just keep moving forward. The cool thing is that I know for sure that I was over 210 last week. The pants I wore last week did not fit and I remember that feeling from the last time I had gotten to 210. How I've managed to lose 8 lbs in a week I have no idea. I've cut back a tad but nothing to get excited abou... Wed, 12 Jan 2011 13:31:51 EST working on it today- I actually didn't do to badly this weekend. I think for right now I'm just going to focus on always packing my breakfast, lunch and snacks. One small step at a time. I had gotten a little crazy there for a while and was getting breakfast and lunch at work everyday. Not only was this getting expensive but I wasn't making the best choices either. Last week I did a lot better, only getting food once. This week I'm going to see if I can do the whole week. <BR> <BR> Feeling pretty good abo... Mon, 10 Jan 2011 08:57:06 EST no excuse really for not logging my food or doing what I need to do over the last couple of months other than I guess I wasn't ready. Things have been crazy truthfully- I know have two fur babies that are keeping me very active and I have also recently moved. Just to the next county but it was a big event. <BR> But what I'm thinking is: NEw year, new puppies, new apartment and I guess a new me. A coworker gave me a christmas gift of a Glamour Shots GC. I've always wanted to do it but I've always been ... Fri, 7 Jan 2011 10:16:41 EST Whew.. things finally settling down It's been a crazy couple of months to say the least. Luckily things are starting to settle down again, and I'm finally back to trying to work on me again. I say I'm going to be committed and then a bunch of "sh*t" hits the fan and everything goes down hill for me. The one good thing is that I learn a little something more about myself every time. <BR> <BR> Well I finally convinced my DH after almost a year of trying that I needed a dog back in our life. My buddy Diamond went to Doggie Heave... Thu, 30 Sep 2010 11:32:16 EST Giving it a big try Realized that the weight isn't coming off because frankly I haven't been giving it my all. So now I am for the moment anyway. I have to stop being so lax on myself. Thu, 29 Jul 2010 11:14:57 EST Not diet related had a lot to think about over the weekend and came to the conclusion that people hold back saying things that are sometimes more important than they think. Sometimes this is do to embarrassement. Rejection, fear of being laughed at. Who knows, probably a billion in ten reasons to not tell someone something you should have. Maybe people just don't take the time to stop and tell someone "you know I appreciate xyz", or "you know you really do have the power to do whatever you want", "you know yo... Tue, 6 Jul 2010 10:09:57 EST been a while and very crazy Things have been bonkers- good, bad, happy and sad. So much has happened since I was on here last and I can say that for the first time since I've been on Spark (over 5 yrs) that I haven't even logged my food. <BR> Where to start, so much drama- <BR> Well first, my mother fell off of a 7 foot wall in her yard in May. My mother is in poor health to begin with (she's only 52 but has ruined her life with drugs and alcohol). She just had most of her intestines and colon removed in Dec. Either wa... Tue, 29 Jun 2010 09:32:02 EST FitFlops Got mine today. I actually got the freestyle one's which aren't actually flip flops because they don't go between the toes. They are more of a slip on. This was my treat to myself for losing 10 lbs. I actually had a gift card for bath and body works that I received for Christmas and I was just saving it for a rainy day. Either way, these things are pretty cool. I can't say that they wobble or anything like I expected but this could be my indoboarding nature. They are however extremely comfort... Fri, 7 May 2010 19:26:55 EST 27 day update Ok, so I was going to get on here and complain because after all I've only lost .6 lbs since last week. Then I had to think about it. First and for most, hey that is still over half a lb. Second, it's TOM so well a little extra weight can be expected. Third, even though I stayed for the most part in my calorie limits I still ate junk off and on. So I think it was a combonation of things that made me not lose as much as I wanted. Some of it my own fault, some of it not. I'm going to keep plugg... Tue, 4 May 2010 09:44:24 EST Just some whining I seem to be coming down with a cold. Normally I wouldn't care too much. At my day job I come in direct contact with nobody. Seeing people walk from place to place is a rare occurance but does happen from time to time and I generally only see them through a very small glass window. Either way I don't worry about making others sick since I take very good precautions. Tomorrow night is my one night off during the week from the childcare at the gym. <BR> <BR> The problem is this is a HUGE baby... Thu, 29 Apr 2010 20:21:56 EST 21 day results Although I didn't see the 190.6 of Sunday, I was 192.6. This is my own fault. The phentermine is working great however I still haven't overcame my "need" to eat in the evening all together. I was doing good and then I started feeling tired and stressed. This lead to me eating about 1/2 of not really diet friendly macadamia nuts. On the flip side, even as I was eating them, I knew I didn't "need" them. I wasn't hungry and I realized that as I popped one after another into my mouth. I think I h... Tue, 27 Apr 2010 09:36:05 EST Keeping myself honest I generally weigh every day. Keep telling myself I'm not going to do that as I know it's not healthy and all to often if I don't like what I see on the scale I'm irritated all day. Case in point, this morning. Now tomorrow is my "official" weigh in day. However- yesterday I got on the scale and holy smokes, I'm 190.6. The neighbors down stairs must think I'm crazy as I was literally jumping up and down. Then I made corned beef for dinner. Now generally I wouldn't eat corned beef, after all it... Mon, 26 Apr 2010 21:00:02 EST 14th day results for the Phen/ Pro and I'm happy. Very happy. At the dr's office I was down 9 lbs since April 6th! I feel great! I have energy- I'm not hungry, and when I am hungry I feel able to make better choices. My days of grazing and snacking seem to be over. I still worry about what happens when I'm off the meds but I can only hope that I have it all situated by then and able to do it on my own. For now I'll take the assistance and be grateful for it. Currently I'm getting between 1100-1200 calories a day. I'm eating fa... Wed, 21 Apr 2010 08:40:37 EST Phen/Pro first week results Today is the seventh day of the phentermine/prozac cocktail. As of today I am down 5.1 lbs. It has tapered off, the first day I lost exactly 3 lbs. I knew even then that it had to be water weight. After that I have lost .50-.75 lbs a day and its been pretty consistant. some days I've even had trouble reaching the 1200 calories that I know I need to get. The night time munches are gone which was one of my biggest problems. I am starting to actually feel hunger here and there but I don't react ... Tue, 13 Apr 2010 18:40:04 EST Phen/Pro so the doctor has put my on a combo of phentremine and prozac. I've know a few people that are trying this combo and they are losing weight big time so I thought I would give it a try. I know I have the diet thing down (If I wasn't so hungry all the time it might actually work!), I know how to log my food and how to eat properly. I know how to exercise. However for the last 15 years or so this simply has not worked. I eat too much because I'm hungry all the time (regardless if it's real hunge... Wed, 7 Apr 2010 13:51:18 EST time to catch up so I was so all over the place on my last posting that I didn't write about all the craziness lately. <BR> <BR> First, I got laid off. Essentially my last day of employment would have been April 2nd. I had a lot of use it or lose it vacation and sick so I used it. I was officially "on vacation" starting the 15th of March. I have worked for my company for 5 yrs and love my job but contracted work is like that and you know the risks. I could have stayed within the company but I would have bee... Fri, 26 Mar 2010 10:00:07 EST yay for me- I'm pretty excited. Well I am and I'm not. I'm at the highest weight in 3 years. That is causing me major self esteem issues. However on the flip side of that it's also woke me up. SO I'm excited that I've woken up. I'm excited that for 3 days I've eaten how I was supposed to and that I've worked out. I'm excited that I'm all about moderation now. I'm excited that I went to Cheeburger Cheeburger for lunch today and simple got a grilled chicken salad! I have 8 weeks of breakfast, lunch... Wed, 24 Mar 2010 17:02:49 EST embarrased now that I realize I haven't written anything in a while. Hmm I'll have to do that at some point since so much has been going on. <BR> <BR> Life is however very good- Fri, 19 Mar 2010 18:56:22 EST Wow- totally didn't think I would be able to get any cardio in today. I even had a billion excuses: I feel broken from yesterday, I'm tired, I'll work out even more Wednesday. The list goes on. But I sucked it up and made it in there and I got in 20 minutes before I felt like my legs simply couldn't get any more in. I spent the day walking like a crab (can you say ouch! man my legs feel like over cooked noodles!) so I'm hoping that will make up for the other 25 minutes of cardio that I was suppose... Tue, 26 Jan 2010 21:02:40 EST OMG- legs are noodles and working out with the personal trainer was confirmation that I've turned into a complete "larda$$" and I generally try not to call myself names just because it's not good for the whole mind thing. But WTF! I've gained about 25 lbs since my dog passed and well it's time to move forward already. I was already over weight before the dog passed so really I can't even blame it on that (RIP my buddy Diamond Dogg I simply can't mourn forever). Excuses over! <BR> <BR> Either way the training ses... Mon, 25 Jan 2010 21:44:13 EST I'm going to try and make it a point to write something every day regardless of how small. Today I was 199 (despite me eating healthy this weekend! )and pretty upset about it. I meet with the personal trainer tonight so I'm excited about that. I have my breakfast, snacks and lunch packed for the day and I have dinner planned out. I think I might not step on the scale till next monday. I have to get away from stepping on it every day. <BR> <BR> Life is still good though- Mon, 25 Jan 2010 10:59:33 EST so I can't really say that I've been bad. However I most certainly can't say that I've been good. The good news is I have a personal trainer scheduled for Monday. I'm very very excited. I'm ready (of course I say that all the time) to stop this vicious constant struggle. I'm ready for my body not to hurt. Ready for a new obsession.. that being me. I'm ready to put me first. <BR> <BR> Yes- Life is good Wed, 20 Jan 2010 20:05:17 EST so like so many others I'm back into the full swing again. Actually I'm pretty proud of myself. I am back into full swing, diet and exercise! Today I got up and ate a very small breakfast, went to the gym, got to work, stuck to my meal plan, managed to make it to my second job and happened to cheat, but only went 45 calories over my daily max and still stayed in all my ranges (except sodium, which is always the worse for me) and my chart balanced out almost perfectly. AND..I didn't spend any money. Being poor shoul... Mon, 4 Jan 2010 20:23:49 EST sooo I'm still sucking- I'm working on it though. I made it to the gym today although I made it so late it only left me with about 7 minutes on a stationary bike. I could have not gone all together but figured it was best to go and get in the habit even though i didn't exactly have time to work out. Just going through the motions. Hopefully tomorrow morning I will be able to get out of bed in enough time to have a cardio session that is a little more rewarding. :) <BR> <BR> Life is still good Mon, 12 Oct 2009 13:31:31 EST I've decided I'm done with the whole Atkins thing. It was yummy but I really didn't lose any weight, I also realize the need for my body to poop. It just isn't normal to go that long with out doing the deed. Maybe it didn't work for me because I already had a fairly healthy diet. I need to cut out the night snacking and I would probably lose some. <BR> So here is back to the old "diet". Eating healthy most of the time and consuming veggies in fruits the way I want. Back is my Beloved Rabbit Pellets. <BR... Sun, 4 Oct 2009 12:26:44 EST Guess who's back.. back again After a long long long time away from Spark I have finally came back. Actually I wasn't really gone but I found that I could log my food on the blackberry to spark so did that for a while. Then I got lazy.. and did nothing for a while. But it is a new month and I'm back for more. I now have about 50 lbs to lose but I'm not going to sweat it. Going to work out like I should and just move forward. <BR> <BR> Life is good~! Fri, 2 Oct 2009 09:31:49 EST it seems to me that it has been a very long time since I was actively logging my calories. This is probably why my weight is creeping back up.. so logical and yet for some reason that wasn't clicking. I think I've been to busy and yet I know that isn't a very good excuse for letting myself go. I apparently wasn't to busy to eat poorly. If I spent less time eating poorly I would probably have more time to write down my food. <BR> <BR> Tomorrow is a new day- and life is good <BR> <BR> As a side note, I hav... Tue, 21 Jul 2009 20:47:35 EST long time but I always return. Haven't done bad or good or anything. Still going to the gym regularly (about 4-5 days a week) and that is something that I'm totally proud of.. not that I really look like I have or anything but I do definitely feel better. <BR> <BR> Life is still good- Sat, 13 Jun 2009 22:10:21 EST Monthly update well I say monthly but I suppse it isn't really a monthly. I just realized that I hadn't written anything in a long time. Which says a lot. I have been extremely busy working out! Woo Hoo for me! It has become my new "hobby". For 5 weeks now, 5 days a week I work out with a friend from work. We either walk outside for about 60-90 minutes or we workout at the gym for about an hour. It has been awesome! I've never had a "heathly lifestyle partner". (we are both watching what we eat as well. Alt... Sat, 25 Apr 2009 12:53:18 EST Gym Been going every day, 2 times a day except for the weekends. Not bad- Sticking to the diet pretty well too! :) Tue, 31 Mar 2009 09:31:14 EST Gym I didn't get to join the gym when I wanted but I was able to join today. It was really good as it would have been too cold to work out outside. I'm pumped. I even had the ability to walk into a Chinese Buffet and then turn around since there wasn't anything even remotely healthy to eat (omg the smell!!) ! Ended up at Subway eating my Veggie Delight. <BR> <BR> Life is good~! Tue, 24 Mar 2009 22:47:46 EST Joining the gym tomorrow with JUDYD174.. I'm writing it here because then of course I have to do it which will in turn cause JUDYD174 to do it. I'm pretty excited. And I'm ready. It's about time- yesterday we both managed to take a walk outside on the trail and I've been walking the dog and of course indoboarding daily (usually my dh walks the dog). I've been following my eating plan perfectly and I'm ready to step it up a notch.. <BR> <BR> Life is good! Thu, 19 Mar 2009 19:26:12 EST March 18, 2009 Things have really really been going well. I'm pretty happy about it. I've pretty much been on target with my eating. No fast food or real junk. I've been weighing and measuring just about everything. Even been exercising despite being sick.. fell back in love with the indoboard so that's always a good thing. Well here's to being on track! <em>224</em> Wed, 18 Mar 2009 20:51:03 EST March 1, 2009 Well today being the first day of the month seems like a good time to make sure that I change and start doing the right thing. How many times have I said that? I don't suppose it really matters- Little steps here and there. I always try to bite to much off at one time. Today I have done really well. Sun, 1 Mar 2009 15:30:24 EST 5 lbs lost in 2 weeks is acceptable. I'm pretty happy with that. I even had a couple completely bad days so that makes it even better. Maybe next week I will lose even more. Sat, 17 Jan 2009 11:20:10 EST LOL It's a new year.. and I've done nothing but gain weight up until this point. I am now up to a glorious 190 lbs. I'm a little distressed by this and yet I'm not. At least now I know that i have the tools and skills to lose the weight. A friend of mine at work is working on getting to her goal weight as well so maybe it will be easier now. <BR> <BR> I've started walking though and I'm proud of myself for that. Every week day I walk with other co-works around our offices for 30 minutes in the ... Sat, 3 Jan 2009 12:43:21 EST Today I am restarting again. I have to figure out something different. Things are just not going the way I want them to and I know this is from my own lack of dedication. Today I will start logging in again everyday no matter what if only to spin the wheel. I have to take more of an effort. Mon, 1 Dec 2008 21:36:37 EST I am so glad that I am getting back on track. Just logging my food makes me feel better. I must say I missed my hot pocket fix today. Those darn things are addictive. Nothing like processed cheese inside, with processed meat stuff, inside of processed pastery like shell that you heat up inside of a microwave. Truly wonderful. <BR> <BR> Life is good~ Mon, 10 Nov 2008 19:31:10 EST Hot Pockets is really all I've been eating lately. Not exactly the healthiest food. Not exactly the worse.. certainly not a salad. However very easy to keep track of calorie consumption when all your eating is Hot Pockets. Very lazy of me. However I really do like them. They tast pretty good, they are fairly filling. I guess I'm not being completely honest. I have eaten some veggies too.. Anyway... <BR> <BR> Life is still good.. <BR> Picture of my kid sister holding our niece <BR> <img src="http://pho... Wed, 5 Nov 2008 16:49:51 EST I'm glad that I don't have anything real pointful to write about. Lots of things going on and I have no urge to write about them. <BR> <BR> Life is good and I plan on making it stay that way. I refuse to let stupid things change how I feel. <BR> <BR> <em>140</em> <BR> <BR> *niece on her 1st birthday after demolishing a her cake* Tue, 21 Oct 2008 20:07:50 EST Salad nice, cold, crisp, tasty salad. Finally I was able to stock up on fresh veggies today. I'm very happy I'm going back to my salads for at least a while. Sun, 19 Oct 2008 19:59:33 EST ok so I've really fell off the wagon here. I have not been logging my food, I have not eaten what I should, and I haven't been exercising. I have no excuse either. I can't say I've been super busy or that I've had some terrible thing happen that prevented me from doing so. Computer works just fine. I just haven't done the right thing. This morning I had lentils for breakfast. That was my effort at being healthy minded. I had some brown rice at lunch but next to the batter fried white meat chicke... Thu, 16 Oct 2008 19:01:58 EST Dagnabbit On my wheel I had a video. On my wheel I watched the video go round and round and I watched me not win the video. It really really sucked. Years ago I one 2 bottles, a couple t-shirts and a really cool duffle bag. Years ago however they charged for the site too so I guess I can't complain! :) I just really want a keychain! <BR> <BR> Still terrible at logging my points on here but I have a general idea in my head of how i'm doing through the day. Last two days I've been way to low. Yesterday... Wed, 8 Oct 2008 20:38:41 EST Still Sucking at logging my food. Just doesn't ever seem like there is enough time in the day. I have however been fairly good. I am definitely missing my salads. <BR> <BR> However I've had awesome news. My cholesterol is now down to 214! <BR> <BR> Highest 3 yrs ago: 268 <BR> 6 months ago: 238 <BR> Current: 214 <BR> <BR> I'm pretty happy. <BR> Thu, 2 Oct 2008 19:28:22 EST I've really sucked logging my food lately. I've not been bad though just haven't really had the time. I made sure to log everything I could remember (which was a good majority since I eat pretty much the same thing during the week anyway). Hopefully I'm pretty much back on track again. I'm just so disappointed that I jacked up my "streak". Oh well. I guess I'll just have to start over again. <BR> <BR> Life is still good~ <em>125</em> Sun, 28 Sep 2008 21:06:13 EST Imagine my shock and excitement at seeing 175.6 on the scale today. I almost didn't believe it. Actually I didn't. I moved the scale around a couple times thinking maybe I was standing on it weird or maybe there was a spot in the tile that was different. But no it really read that. I was very happy. I'm not going to weigh myself for the rest of the week if I can help it. I don't want to jinx myself. ;) Mon, 15 Sep 2008 22:11:30 EST Today I finally got to move my ticker down. I never did reach my of 170/175 lbs by the beginning of Sept. I don't blame myself. I worked hard, my body simply was not willing to do it. Even now my ticker is simply reading 177.6. I got excited anyway. This week I won't be eating my salad. My financial budget won't allow for it. I almost had a little breakdown about not having my salads but you have to do what you have to do. Luckily we have plenty of other healthy foods laying around for me to pack f... Sun, 14 Sep 2008 10:19:23 EST I think I would be less agitated if this diet of mine was showing some results. One can only eat so many salads. Everyday it is basically the same thing or some combination of the same thing. It isn't that I don't like what I'm eating. I like it just fine, I'm just agitated that nothing is happening on the scale. I've even been exercising (not tons but more than I was). I will try upping it up a bit. <BR> <BR> Anyway.. I will keep plugging along.. Maybe I've just platued.. Maybe I'm supposed to be ... Sat, 6 Sep 2008 23:24:43 EST