MRFUZZ's SparkPeople Blog MRFUZZ's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Darkness into light I used to struggle to get my steps in. Then my car went missing and I found out what fitbit meant by steps when I searched for him. I found him, AND kept up the walking. That was 1 1/2 years ago. Ben has been dead now from cancer for 6 months. 😿🌈💔. My heart aches for him. I still walk. It’s Ben’s legacy. But I will always miss our life together. I am healthier for my walking. I have lost weight, lost cholesterol, lost some blood sugar, gained some sleep... Sat, 21 Oct 2017 23:18:29 EST Today Today I exercised on the treadmill two times so far. I don't know if I will make it a third time; I would like to. I don't know if I should get one star on the calendar or two. I don't know if I will eat properly. I don't know if I will exercise tomorrow. But this is what I have done today. In the past it seems I did not want to go over 200 pounds. Now it seems I don't want to go over 170 pounds. I'm not sure. I don't know if I am on a streak. Today, just for today, I have exercise... Sat, 15 Feb 2014 12:51:48 EST Victory! I was at the mall, and walked into a store with some cute clothes hanging on the rack. I asked the girl, (young and skinny of course), where a pair of pants would be for my size. She got me a pair which fit and looked very cute. Then she said I might want to shop at the other mall store they have over in clackamas because this store was the smaller sizes. I had gotten the biggest size they had, and they would have more in the other store. Wow! You mean I shopped in a skinny girl store a... Sun, 26 May 2013 08:56:51 EST The winter weight gain I work with a male coworker. He rides his bike to work every day. He eats healthy. He looks good. He mentioned the other day he had gained 5 pounds in a month. He now understood how easy it was to gain 50-60 pounds in a year "if you weren't paying attention". He hadn't been riding his bike because of the rain. He had been eating more Halloween candy, and more food in general. He also stated he was going to eat less, "nip this in the bud". He doesn't now talk daily about this and ob... Sat, 1 Dec 2012 10:34:15 EST Why I do I walk so fast, or so far? I was asked the other day why I try to walk so fast or so far. The person who asked me said she and her husband walk about 2-3 miles at about 3.5 mph. First, let me say, Any activity at all, is always going to better than none. Always. Read "The First Twenty Minutes". <BR> <BR> The simple answer is because I can. <BR> <BR> The longer answer is because I couldn't used to. I didn't walk at all. I sat on the sofa all day. I was depressed. In fact, I laid on the sofa all day. Th... Wed, 26 Sep 2012 12:53:11 EST Simple concept reviewed... Everything you need to know about fat loss....Wow! After reading this, I am totally revamping my diet. My indulgence of carbs is sabotaging my weight loss and blood sugar. The simpler the carbs, the higher the blood sugar. The higher the blood sugar, the more insulin produced. The more insulin produced, the hungrier I am. Simple concept; but I needed a review! More protein in the diet coming right up. Along behind, more veggies! <em>230</em> Tue, 11 Sep 2012 17:11:04 EST Some things I don't take for granted....any more 1. Number one, of course, is feeling good, not depressed. <BR> Sitting after exercise is so much more pleasant than just sitting all day long. It just feels different. <BR> <BR> 2. My ability to walk, to move, to climb a flight of stairs. I realize now, this gift of movement could be taken away at any moment. How lucky I am to be able to move! <BR> <BR> 3. Not being diabetic. I appreciate now that my body can better manage my blood sugar. That's a whole algorithm of compli... Sat, 23 Jun 2012 11:24:47 EST The first 20 minutes I have been reading a new book called the first 20 minutes. If I wasn't already exercising, this would certainly make me want to start! It also reinforces what I have been thinking...if you are a total slug as I was, and start exercising even twenty minutes at a time, you will have huge changes within your body. You don't have to work out hard to get these improvements. You just have to start moving, anything. <BR> <BR> It seems like most people on this site are running marathons. I a... Sun, 10 Jun 2012 22:51:45 EST What motivated me to exercise today? Today, after yet again another nite of poor sleep because of my shoulder, I did not want to work out. I couldn't make myself do it by thinking of the weight I had already lost. I couldn't make myself do it because of how much better my cholesterol and blood sugar are. I couldn't make myself do it by thinking of the heaviest person I know. I couldn't make myself do it by thinking of how embarrassed I would be if I regained the weight. <BR> <BR> Finally, I thought of how I would be feeli... Mon, 28 May 2012 12:41:10 EST Why exercise? So...I've been exercising on average 200 minutes per week since the end of January. It adds up to 6 lbs. (I recorded it in the spark app, and looked at the monthly spread sheet to get my calories burned, and divided that by 3600 (1 lb). ). <BR> <BR> So why bother doing all that exercise for 6 pounds? Well. Here's why. I have more tolerance now for activity, which means I have more stamina and energy, which has improved my outlook on life, which then really increased my quality of life... Tue, 15 May 2012 23:02:51 EST My secret? Do it at home Today I bought myself a home gym. Well, ok, not really. It was a spark goodie to myself. As I was finally earning my 1000 minutes of exercise/month award, (my first), I realized I would never have gotten this far if I had had to not only motivate myself to exercise, but also leave the house to do it. Having the elliptical at home is working for me. Yes, I probably owned it for two years before it was used as more than another piece of climbing equipment for the cats. But I did it! <BR... Sun, 29 Apr 2012 14:06:33 EST Some things I've learned 1. I've learned I can feel satisfied, food wise, without stuffing myself. Hunger is really not an emergency, a feeling I can't handle. I can tolerate a bit of hunger because I'm not feeling deprived. I stop eating when I am no longer hungry. But when I am hungry, I eat, just not as much as I used to. <BR> <BR> 2. I don't like exercise, but I dislike more the feelings of "I can't," being breathless, being unable to keep up with others, low self esteem. Exercise has improved all of th... Wed, 18 Apr 2012 17:50:50 EST Like the commercials I have lost weight. The commercials that I used to think we're just silly I now love. The woman at the goodwill box dropping off clothes because they are too big? Check! " You noticed!". Check! The woman now calling the soup company with the man answering? Finally she says " is there a woman I can talk to?". Check! I get it! <BR> <BR> I love this new feeling! People come up to me and say I look different. Have I lost weight? Yes, thank you for noticing! I have! These things he... Sun, 1 Apr 2012 14:32:24 EST Fat cat So, I used to tell my cat fuzz that he was fluffy like his mama. Well, mama is losing weight. She's not as fluffy as she used to be. So, I now realize after my workouts, I'm going to have to start playing more with fuzz, and doing a second workout, so to speak. (it always used to exhaust me to play very much with them). I can't in good conscience not try to help him. I can't limit hs food. I have 3 cats, and they free feed. The others are not fat. I work long hours. So, I will have... Sat, 24 Mar 2012 14:53:45 EST March 4. Time heals Todsy is my niece's birthday. I cannot wish her happy birthday because she is not in contact with me anymore. I do not know her phone number or where she lives. I hope she is ok out there in the universe. I hope today she will have a peaceful day. <BR> <BR> Time does really help heal the jagged edges. I will always miss her. I am thankful my pain of her absence has lessened. Take care, miss k. Love, auntie Sun, 4 Mar 2012 11:06:46 EST Birthday. No more all or nothing My birthday was different this year. I ate one piece of cake. Yes, I said one piece. And I didn't give up for the day, and then the week because I did. <BR> <BR> I seem to have changed. All or nothing doesn't work for me anymore. Well, it really never did. But it was how I thought. It was only with food. That thought was so irrational, my all or nothing thinking, that it could only apply to food and exercise. When I didn't quite stop at a stop sign, I still followed all the other tr... Sat, 25 Feb 2012 19:55:54 EST Minute by minute, better quality of life Today I had to make myself work out. I have been losing wt. But last nite I woke up at 2 am and somehow found myself lying in bed eating a can of peanuts. I mean, really? The sheets were fresh. I was on roll with the whole eating better and exercise thing. I wake up eating peanuts? So I felt I'm on the downward slide now. I don't wanna workout. Why bother if I'm going to eat peanuts? <BR> <BR> Yesterday's excuse was I have to watch whitney Houston's funeral. Yes, any excuse will do... Sun, 19 Feb 2012 13:54:42 EST I can do it!!! <em>249</em> Sun, 10 Apr 2011 13:48:28 EST Failure I was doing so well. Then the hour long workouts got to be too much. So I went into the all or nothing mode. Then I spiraled and my eating was out of control. Now I've gone from losing 16 lbs to losing 10. It came on so quickly. I have to get back to the program. In 2 months I will have my next dr appt. It will be evident I fell off the wagon and straight into the KFC and all the things I missed. My blood will tell on me . It will be evident by looking at me. I feel like some kind ... Sat, 9 Apr 2011 21:13:49 EST Starting over I was doing so well . It felt magical. I worked out, ate better andit just worked. For at least the last 2 weeks, my eating has gotten way out of hand. Then I let the exercise become hit or miss. I mean, what was the point the way I was eating? <BR> <BR> Well, back to the basics. I was working out for my health. It was my medicine, which I have started skipping, too. The exercise was my medicine. I also need to take my drugs. And the diet needs to become the bonus, not the point, ... Tue, 15 Mar 2011 18:37:45 EST Redefining my goals In the very beginning, I did not care how fat I was. I see people all the time who weigh more than me. I'm ok. Well, that is until I try on new clothes, since mine are getting tight. I finally find one or two. Ok, I'm happy. As I said, I see people all the time who appear to weigh more than me. <BR> <BR> Then one day I am like a drug addict, in this case a food addict, who gets "found out" by my doctor. My labs are all screwed up. My inner body has told on my outer body. So even i... Sun, 6 Mar 2011 18:46:20 EST The newness is wearing off.....and yet I have been working out almost 60 days now and have only taken 2 days off. I find I really don't look forward to the workouts any more. I think I have established my new habit of working out now. Time to look at my schedule for each week, and plan to take a day off. That way I will have that day to look forward to; and I won't feel like I am slacking. <BR> <BR> I do like looking at my belly now. I no longer look pregnant. The Velcro on my X-ray lead apron I have to wear at work actua... Tue, 1 Mar 2011 19:08:25 EST I do not need to be hungry I don't need to be hungry. <BR> But I need to quit eating when I am no longer hungry. <BR> I can eat tasty food. <BR> But I need to quit eating when I am no longer hungry. <BR> <BR> Exercise has helped stop the weight gain. <BR> But I need to quit eating when I am no longer hungry. <BR> <BR> Then I will lose weight. <BR> When I quit eating when I am no longer hungry. <BR> <BR> I sleep better when I don't overeat. <BR> I will no longer be so hot. <BR> When I quit eating when I am no longer ... Sat, 26 Feb 2011 11:37:50 EST My birthday Today is my birthday. God gave me snow for my birthday. Of course it was melted by noon. But that's ok. It didn't mess up our traffic too bad. <BR> <BR> Today I gave myself praise for working out. It's much more of a present to me to work out than sit on the couch. I don't have nearly as many aches and pains as I used to. Sleeping still eludes me many nights. I still grieve for the family who left last year. I will probably always miss them. But today no one is arguing why "the p... Thu, 24 Feb 2011 16:48:51 EST Only 10 AM. Already failure Tomorrow is my birthday . I craved chocolate last nite. Did not eat it. Today started out so well. I was -15lbs. Proud I didn't cave into the craving last nite. Then todayright after brkfst I ate 1200 calories worth of the cake. The self loathing is huge! No cake for me tomorrow. Because of what I've learned from the spark guy I won't do the downward spiral today. I will move on. I will still do the usual workout; but al <BR> almost would work out all day to make up for it if I cou... Wed, 23 Feb 2011 13:17:17 EST Me? Inspiration? Yesterday one of my co workers who is definitely in shape, eats healthy, and works out all the time, told me I was her inspiration for working out that am. In astonishment, I asked her why. She said she just didn't feel like getting up that morning and doing it; but she knew I would be up working out. She was right. If I don't do it before work I know I won't. So I was up working out. Today, however, she was my inspiration. I was off and didn't do it first thing. I got comfortable on ... Tue, 22 Feb 2011 18:13:28 EST Halfway! I have worked out 51 days now. I have lost 14-15 lbs. I have much more to lose; but my first goal is 25 lbs. It seems easier by breaking it up to into smaller chunks. It's more obtainable for me. Each bag of cat litter is 10 lbs. So I have lost about 1.5 bags. That's much more meaningful to me than envisioning fat. When I buy the cat litter I have to get it off the shelf, into the cart, into the car, into the house, into the cat boxes, out to the garbage, and whew, that's exhausting. ... Sun, 20 Feb 2011 12:40:20 EST Please pray My friend has cancer and has lost her insurance because her cobra has run out and she is unable to work. Now her so has almost sawed off his 4 fingers in his left hand and will most likely get 3 if them amputated. He runs his own business, so he can't work at least until June they say, prob longer. I don't know what else to do except ask people to please pray. He was fixing his neighbors mailbox when the accident happened. Thank you spark people! Sun, 13 Feb 2011 19:44:06 EST It's getting easier I have been working out 44 days now. In the past 46 days I have missed 2 days, yesterday being one of them. But I believe the rest was good for me . My legs were getting very sore. Today working out on the elliptical was easier. I could do it without feeling like I can't. My blood pressure is better. My blood sugar is getting better. And I have lost 13-14 lbs. I'm really starting to know I can do this. This is how long it took me for it to feel easier. Sun, 13 Feb 2011 15:45:42 EST Exercise Is My Medicine I began this journey because I was given the great diagnoses of "you have high blood pressure, high chol, and you are an out of control type 2 diabetic. You will end up on insulin. You can drop dead at any minute.". I literally left the dr office in tears. I sat in walgreens waiting for my prescriptions in tears. <BR> <BR> I went for my first diabetes class. I was down. I said I can't lose weight. The instructor said, "it isn't about losing weight. Exercise is your MEDICINE.". <BR> ... Sun, 6 Feb 2011 19:04:35 EST It really works This is the first time I have ever gone on a diet and the whole point wasn't to starve myself; but to adopt a new healthy life style. I am on day 35 of my streak. I eat THREE Meals per day plus snack. I always eat my full calorie allotment. I don't feel deprived. And get this! I am losing weight! Who would think it could happen? But my body doesn't feel deprived. I am learning new skills with this spark program that I can follow, for the rest of my life. I screw up sometimes an... Thu, 3 Feb 2011 15:28:26 EST Motivation Sometimes it's a fine line between doing the workout and not doing it. This morning I just so didn't feel like it. I hadn't slept well, which in turn left me wanting to do nothing. I knew someone might ask if I was still working on my 100 days. I could lie to them: but I WOULD KNOW. So that didn't help either. Finally I took my BP and Blood sugar. I saw how much better they were in 30 some days of this. That helped to motivate me. Finally I just got up and did it because once I went ... Tue, 1 Feb 2011 08:05:43 EST Music motivators You won't dance alone. This comes from the second pink glove dance. The first pink glove dance started at my hospital. Yahoo! The reason l like this song is because it is so uplifting. I'm starting on this "dance", and I don't feel I'm doing it alone. Yes, I work out alone in my home; but I have the support of all of you on spark people, my friends, my work friends, and especially ME! I feel I am coming out of a deadly disease into health. My diab and high blood pressure put me at ris... Sat, 29 Jan 2011 10:15:15 EST Motivation. Still going strong Day 30 now and still at it. I have been adding time and now do 30 minutes on work days and 2 30 or 40 min times on non work days. I told those I work with. I am becoming an inspiration to them. And they are becoming my support. I don't always want to do the workouts. But I just get up and do it first thing. It has started to become a habit now. I no longer dread it and have to make myself do it. I just get up and do it. This is transforming me. I have more of a spark for life. I h... Fri, 28 Jan 2011 22:02:21 EST Motivation Working hard on this. 17 days I have not sat on the couch. Still hard every day to get up and do. Still wiped after every workout. But I am motivated to become healthy. I am totally reconditioned at this point. But very motivated. So 1 day at a time. And now on to day 18. When will it be easier? I'm guessing 3-4 months at least <em>198</em> Sun, 16 Jan 2011 09:46:28 EST