MINEA999's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=MINEA999 MINEA999's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Jealousy Rears Its Ugly Head http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5804581 Wow I didn't realize it had been so long since I did a blog entry. <BR> <BR> Anyway, this is something that's been bothering me for the past maybe week or two and I just thought I'd share my predominant mood lately. <BR> <BR> Jealousy. <BR> <BR> It's a horrible thing and yet so HARD not to have it!! <BR> <BR> So I have this very close friend of mine, she was around my starting weight a few months ago, and now she's lost more than I have. <BR> <BR> See I lost 70 lbs, gained 14 back be... Sat, 25 Oct 2014 15:20:17 EST Expectations for BLC26 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5784952 I expect that I will screw up. <BR> I expect that I will not feel like exercising on at least one day. <BR> I expect that I will want to eat chocolate for dinner instead of vegetables. <BR> I expect that I will not see a number that I wanted to see on weigh-in-days. <BR> I expect that my commitment will waver. <BR> I expect that excuses will abound. <BR> <BR> I also expect that I will forgive myself for screwing up. <BR> I also expect that I WILL feel like exercising on many other days. <BR>... Mon, 22 Sep 2014 18:43:06 EST I Want To Cut Off My Right Foot http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5781034 For months… okay a year… I’ve had pain issues in my right heel. I remember the day it started quite clearly. I was walking home from work, the back of my shoe was coming apart and started rubbing on my heel (basically shredding my heel). I started to change my gait to keep it from doing that and was walking kind of funny. I should have got on the bus but instead, I kept walking the rest of the 5k. And ever since then, I’ve had issues with pain in that heel and calf and I think I’ve reall... Tue, 16 Sep 2014 13:44:04 EST Wild Rose D-Tox Cleanse - Days 6,7,8,9,10 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5776526 I bet you were thinking I quit didn’t you? Cause I didn’t do a write up for days…. Well you would be…. Wrong! But I admit, I certainly came close a few times. Like on Saturday when we went through the McDonald’s drive thru to get my friend’s kids some ice cream cones (hot day) and she got a McFlurry for herself and I got….nothing. <BR> <BR> <em>46</em> <BR> <BR> I feel like the joy of food has been ripped away from me and all my choices are boring and restrictive. But I’ve made it... Tue, 9 Sep 2014 11:34:57 EST Wild Rose D-Tox Cleanse - Days 4 & 5 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5773351 I didn’t get around to blogging yesterday because I was running interviews all day and was nowhere near my computer. So this update is for both Day 4 and 5. <BR> <BR> Day 4 was okay, starting to get bored of the food. It all tastes so bland. Even though I add herbs and spices! I was even more lazy on that day and frankly pretty irritable. My bus was 40 minutes late getting me home due to a traffic accident and by then I was STARVING and had no intention of going to kickboxing. That wa... Thu, 4 Sep 2014 12:44:08 EST Wild Rose D-Tox Cleanse - Day 3 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5771942 So day 3 was very much like Day 2. Kinda lethargic, bit achy. I did finally get down to the gym for a workout but it took me all day to get there and I couldn’t quite get through the whole 65 minute workout (this is the trainer-designed one that I do 2-3 times a week) – I just didn’t have it in me. I got to 55 minutes – close enough. I also slept horribly the night before so that probably had something to do with it. My cat has feline dementia. Sometimes she goes down to the main floor ... Tue, 2 Sep 2014 13:51:48 EST Wild Rose D-tox Cleanse - Day 2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5771166 Day 2 was a bit tougher than the first day. Sugar cravings! Wanted something sweet after I'd finished every meal. So I'd chomp a few raspberries and wait a few minutes and it would usually go away. <BR> <BR> I was also very lethargic and a bit achy. I just bummed around the house all day and had plans to do all kinds of things but most of what I did involved lying on the couch watching Grey's Anatomy on Netflix (I only just discovered this show and now I'm addicted). The only things I ... Mon, 1 Sep 2014 12:54:48 EST Wild Rose D-tox Cleanse - Day 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5770527 So I decided to do this Wild Rose D-tox cleanse. No sugar, dairy or flour (and a few other things) for 12 days along with some supplements. Mostly you eat a lot of brown rice, fish, almonds and vegetables with some domestic fruits (berries, apples etc. nothing tropical). I've had many friends try it. Everyone had good results but different journeys (some had it easier than others). <BR> <BR> So yesterday was day 1. So far, no ill side effects with the exception of a slightly queasy stomac... Sun, 31 Aug 2014 14:02:33 EST To Detox or Not to Detox - Wild Rose? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5766743 So a friend of mine is trying the Wild Rose detox and was telling me about it. I'm thinking about maybe doing it too. It doesn't seem overly drastic and it's only 12 days. I thought maybe it could help me get back on an even keel. Reduce the cravings so I'm not wanting to mainline chocolate constantly. <BR> <BR> Has anyone ever done it and if so - thoughts? Mon, 25 Aug 2014 13:07:24 EST It’s 9:30am and I’ve already eaten 1,100 calories. And how are YOU today? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5764938 Starting yesterday morning, I decided to start getting brutally honest with myself. I’ve got the exercise thing on a good track, I like it, I look forward to it and I’m getting exercise 6 days a week. Like truly sweaty exercise. But my eating, oh man, my eating is out of control again. I haven’t been tracking for a few weeks (I’ve been pretty sporadic the last few months really). So yesterday I made a vow that no matter WHAT I ate, I was going to track it. This morning I ate my cheerios... Fri, 22 Aug 2014 12:37:19 EST Same issues, different week.lol http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5762275 <BR> I’ve been having a few rough weeks food-wise. I haven’t gotten on a scale in 3 weeks. This is a bad cycle to be in – ‘oh I had a really bad week, I’m going to skip my weigh-in’ (thus any weight gain that occurred in that period didn’t ACTUALLY happen right?). I’ve been great in the way of exercise – at least 5 days a week, usually 6. Kickboxing and trainer workouts have been helping me build muscle and strength but I know I haven’t lost any weight because I’ve been making some prett... Mon, 18 Aug 2014 16:42:26 EST Setting Myself Up For Destructive Decisions! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5754452 I’ve recently become very aware of one of my worst setup-to-fail situations. It has happened to me twice this week that I can think of and both times it has spelled DOOM. The problem? I let myself get too hungry. And when I get too hungry, I make poor decisions. I don’t just make poor decisions, I actually make destructive ones. Let’s take yesterday for example. I stopped at the mall after work to get some mascara and then decided to wander around the mall just a bit before I went home... Wed, 6 Aug 2014 14:01:55 EST Kickboxing My Psyche http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5745163 When I last checked in at the beginning of July I was totally planning on blogging at least every few days. But I’ve just been so darn busy working out I haven’t had a chance! Hehe <BR> <BR> So here I am 3 weeks later. The hope that some of the gain was water weight was in fact true. I lost I think 4 lbs in the first week of starting to track and drink water regularly – water weight! But the rest has not melted off so much. So my total gain was 11 lbs. However, instead of concentratin... Wed, 23 Jul 2014 18:16:29 EST Seriously. How is that even possible? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5729944 So the last time I weighed in was on April 9th. At the time, my therapist had suggested that I just stop weighing myself for a while and concentrate on my mental and physical well being without being tied to a number of the scale. <BR> <BR> In that time (almost 3 months now, hard to believe) I went to Italy for 3 weeks and yes I ate a sh*t ton of carbs with lots of bread, pasta and pizza. But I also did a hell of a lot of walking. I continued to work out 3-6 times a week when I was home. ... Tue, 1 Jul 2014 15:18:00 EST Ignorant Writers Perpetuating Myths of the Overweight http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5722150 I read an article this morning in my local paper entitled 'Nudge Nudge: Follow this easy plan to lose weight' <BR> <BR> The article is here: <link>www.timescolonist.com/nudge-nudge-fo<BR>llow-this-easy-plan-to-lose-weight-1.1<BR>137246 </link> <BR> <BR> This article pissed me off SO quickly, that for the first time in my life, I actually wrote the author. Below is my letter and the response I received within 5 minutes of sending it. <BR> <BR> ________________________________ <BR> Dear ... Fri, 20 Jun 2014 13:22:36 EST This Wasn’t Exactly What I Had In Mind http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5720077 So… yesterday was my birthday. I do not say this to elicit ‘happy birthday’ salutations but to put into context my mental status of the past few days. I turned 38 years old yesterday and I did most of my ‘celebrating’ (let’s be honest, others were celebrating, I was cringing) on the weekend and told everyone that I had a class to go to so I couldn’t go out ON my actual birthday. The class I had was actually my group therapy but I don’t make it widely known that I’m doing it because it’s a ... Tue, 17 Jun 2014 18:11:08 EST There’s Good Days, Bad Days, and Then There’s Binge Days… http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5714390 So since being back from vacation (and let’s be honest, about 4 weeks leading up to it too) I’ve been trying to reign in my sugar addiction that has become wildly out of control. I’ve been trying to get back onto my path of healthy eating and feeling good but it’s been a really rocky start. There were a few days last week where I didn’t just blow it from some not so great choices - I was full-on binging. Like on Wednesday when I got Thai takeout (pad thai and deep fried spring rolls) for d... Mon, 9 Jun 2014 17:37:20 EST Cat Wrastlin’ http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5710544 Ever tried to herd cats? Well that’s what I do for a living. Basically. So you’d think I’d be well skilled at herding my own cat and getting some medicine down her throat. But no, that’s a whole other skill set apparently. <BR> <BR> My poor kitty Purrl, who is 15 years old and has pretty bad arthritis but other than that is fine and a giant pain in the butt like every other cat, has not been feeling well. I think she didn’t take too kindly to my being away for 3 weeks. I left her wit... Wed, 4 Jun 2014 12:54:26 EST Forgive myself? Are you kidding me? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5709824 So for the past few months I’ve been doing this group therapy thing on Monday nights that concentrates on self-acceptance, body confidence and self-esteem. I missed the past 3 weeks because I’d been away and so last night went to the first one in a while. The topic we were concentrating on last night was forgiving ourselves. It was not about forgiving others for what they’d done to us or how they’d made us feel or a myriad of other things. It was solely concentrated on acknowledging thing... Tue, 3 Jun 2014 14:46:11 EST Pasta and Pizza and Bread - Oh my! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5709076 We all go through ups and downs on this journey to healthy amiright or amiright? <BR> <BR> How many times have you seen some of your favourite Sparkfriends disappear into the ether and then magically reappear (and then maybe disappear and reappear again etc. etc. etc.)? It happens. Life happens, you get busy, you stop making yourself your priority, you make excuses, you win your own internal argument that it’s just too damn hard to keep doing this all the time and then you stop checking... Mon, 2 Jun 2014 16:11:27 EST Oh White Bread How I Long For Thee http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5646199 We're not just talking Wonderbread here. I mean GOOD white bread. Bakery sourdough or french bread or real flaky french croissants (not those awful north american doughy kind that you make sandwiches out of) or those yummy half croissant/half cinnamon roll thingies. If it's white and crunchy - I'm drooling. <BR> <BR> I love white bread. I especially love to toast it and smother it in butter. I love butter too, now that I think about it. <BR> <BR> White bread is one of my biggest neme... Wed, 12 Mar 2014 12:56:10 EST Where Have I Been? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5643684 THAT is an excellent question my friends. I'm asking myself that same question. The last blog entry I made was at the beginning of January and it's now more than 2 months later. <BR> <BR> Well, where I've been is struggling. Oh sure, I still logged on everyday, I even tracked my food for most days - up until a few weeks ago I could tell you basically everything I'd eaten for the past year. But I've been half-assing that too lately, I'll track in the morning and then if I eat a poor choic... Sun, 9 Mar 2014 15:10:56 EST So THAT didn't go exactly as planned... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5581160 You know that saying 'The road to hell is paved with good intentions'? <BR> <BR> Yeah. That was the holidays for me. <BR> <BR> Going into it, I thought yeah, I got this. I've dealt with lots of my 'issues' and developed all these 'tools' so I can handle something as innocuous as several days off in a row, a hiccup in my routine and a few family dinners. <BR> <BR> Yeah not so much. <BR> <BR> Turns out, and of course you and I both knew this, that nothing has really been fixed in this gra... Fri, 3 Jan 2014 19:41:44 EST Hanging on by fingernails this week. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5560553 I've been having a rough week. A rough few weeks really. While I'm continuing to get my exercise in every day, my food issues seem to be rearing their ugly head (just when I thought I'd gotten a hold of them and started to 'master them'). <BR> <BR> I've been doing a lot of 'comfort eating' and a lot of 'just this once'. Except 'just this once' isn't supposed to mean just-this-once-a-day-along-with-a-bunch-of<BR>-other-crap. And I've been bingeing which I haven't done in a while. I've ... Mon, 9 Dec 2013 13:04:43 EST 20% Of Me Is Gone But Will My Brain Allow Me More? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5540220 <BR> So with today’s weigh-in, I have officially lost 20% of my starting weight. It took a little longer than I had hoped or planned (doesn’t it always) and every day was a struggle but I eventually got here. I have a long ways to go but that’s why it’s important to make interim goals so that you feel like you’re accomplishing something. My next goal will be to get to my lowest adult weight – that’s in another 16 lbs. Things are starting to slow down now, more like an average of 1 to 1.5... Wed, 13 Nov 2013 14:18:14 EST Feeding the Emotion Monster http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5528337 Since March my weight has been slowly going down, falling under ‘the yellow line’ on the weight loss report. Sometimes it’s a lot under it and sometimes it was just a little. But since I returned from my trip in early September, that yellow line is now BELOW where my weight loss is. Meaning I will likely not be hitting my goal for the year by New Years. <BR> <BR> Yesterday was my 3rd week of weighing in where I hovered in this same 2 lb range. And I was a total saint most of those weeks... Thu, 31 Oct 2013 12:20:58 EST FOOD. And lots of it! (pics) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5519420 FOOD. <BR> <BR> I love the stuff. Obviously. That’s why I’m here on Sparkpeople. Because I loved it so much that apparently I chose to keep carrying with me all the food I’ve eaten. My problem has never really been snacking or night eating. It’s been eating copious amounts of the WRONG FOOD. The deep fried, cheese laden, butter coated oohy gooey goodness that I would obsess over. That I would eat until my gut was crying for mercy. That I would keep shovelling in, using it to address e... Mon, 21 Oct 2013 13:04:52 EST Skinny Jeans. To wear or not to wear. THAT is the question http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5503555 <BR> So there’s a horrible side effect to this whole weight loss thing. It’s called ‘saggy bum’ and I’m its latest victim. I was down to only 2 pairs of pants that I could wear comfortably – my black cords (so soft, so comfy, so….loose), and my beat up blue jeans – but I could live with that. I mean, they’d make do until I absolutely HAD to buy new clothes, right? Let me clarify here – I hate shopping. I don’t think even if I was a regular size that I’d like shopping. I could be wrong ... Thu, 3 Oct 2013 13:54:53 EST Dating In My Post-Depression Era http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5500467 So this topic is something that has been very much on the forefront of my thinking for the past few weeks. To be really honest, for a very long time, I just haven’t dated. I was full of excuses and I easily complained that I never met anyone and that all the good men were married or gay. But the truth was, I never even put myself out there. It was so much easier to stay home and cocoon myself than to stick my neck out and risk being hurt. The couple of times I did try I couldn’t handle the... Mon, 30 Sep 2013 15:10:38 EST BLC23 Goals - Bring It On! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5495908 <BR> So I was mildly surprised and kinda stoked that when I got on the scale this morning I saw the same number that I had when I left for my vacation. When I got back, I was up almost 5 lbs but that seems to have gone away again and thus all that food I ate and booze I drank over the two weeks never happened. And you can’t prove it did. <BR> <BR> I’m still struggling with the next big goal. Since I’ve been home I’ve noticed that I’ve made some not so stellar choices and the little devi... Wed, 25 Sep 2013 13:04:05 EST My Boobs Are a Built-In Flotation Device and Other Insignificant Ramblings… http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5493824 <BR> Seriously, built in flotation device. I’m sure those of you that are similiarly endowed have noticed this too. I can float vertically and not drown without moving a single muscle. I swear. And in salt water? I’m practically Jesus - so buoyant I almost walk on water. If you think about it, it’s a huge bonus. I mean, if I ever fell out of a boat in the middle of the ocean, assuming it wasn’t like arctic cold and we were somewhere near Hawaii, I could totally float for hours until so... Mon, 23 Sep 2013 12:42:38 EST I'm Good At Spending Money I Don't Technically Have Yet. :) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5488823 Hey look what I just bought for my basement gym! <BR> <BR> I can't run or walk very far right now as I recover from my back injury, so I found a great used elliptical at a good price and splurged. I figure the investment is worth it right? Even if I could walk or run, it's more difficult as it gets darker out earlier so it will be nice to have this right downstairs! <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/1/l116319839.jpg"> Wed, 18 Sep 2013 00:05:00 EST Alright that's over... so now what? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5488474 Alright so the vacation is over, I’m slowly trying to regain those great habits I had before I left but I’m struggling because I don’t have a vision to work towards. You see, for the past 6 months I have had this looming date of the wedding. This was a rock solid date, there was a dress picked out and I was going to have to wear it. So I wanted to look and feel the best I possibly could. I think I accomplished that pretty well – I felt pretty confident on the day. I had lost a steady aver... Tue, 17 Sep 2013 16:18:15 EST What I Learned On My Summer Vacation (with pics!) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5484878 This is a long one so either bear with me or just scroll to the end and write 'great post!' I won’t know the difference anyway. I had so much running through my brain the last two weeks, I started to jot down notes for this blog entry! <BR> <BR> So I’m back from the great wedding trip of 2013. There are no more weddings to attend and with you all as my witnesses and due to the fact that I have no other siblings, I hereby vow never to be in another wedding again. That probably includes one... Fri, 13 Sep 2013 19:49:59 EST Taking and Giving Chances http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5470940 For those of you that are already my SP friends, you'll probably have noticed that I've slowly been making my way through 75 Ways to Stay Positive and posting one of them every day or two on my status updates. The reason I'm doing this is because along my journey I'm working on developing a more positive attitude and outlook to life. I've been a glass half-empty kind of girl that always expects the worst outcome for too long now. So I received the list of 75 ways in an email one day and I... Fri, 30 Aug 2013 14:22:59 EST Reflections on BLC22 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5468901 I joined BLC22 a few months ago not really knowing what it was. But I’d seen a few of my friends join up, so I figured I’d give it a try. I figured it might be useful to keep me on track and definitely has! <BR> <BR> I was so intimidated at first, it was all so overwhelming. Challenges to keep track of and fit into my schedule and all these people posting just post after post and I was thinking I couldn’t possibly get to know all these people and I couldn’t possibly post every day! But... Wed, 28 Aug 2013 12:12:10 EST Pasty Whiteness, Walking and Mothers - none of which are related. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5467197 So here's a fun fact about me. I'm white. Like PALE white. Like, all my ancestors are from Scotland and they never really saw the sun and I continue to live in Canada, and on the west coast no less so that I can ensure that it's only actually sunny here about a 1/4 of the year. <BR> <BR> My stomach has never seen the sun or at least, not since I wore that bikini when I was about 2. I think if I ever had the guts to sunbathe topless, I'd probably blind people. So for the past 2 months, ... Mon, 26 Aug 2013 20:50:01 EST Is It Wrong To Donate Blood Just To Eat Cookies And Show A Loss? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5461974 <BR> I’ll admit it. I purposefully booked my blood donation appointment the day before weigh-in day. And also because then I could eat cookies guilt free. I always pick the ones that I’d never buy – like Oreos. And I figured a pint of blood has to weigh… what? A pound? I know, it’s terrible. It’s practically cheating. But whatevs, I’ll take it. I’ve been donating blood for a long time but took a break for about a year. I’m back to doing it. It doesn’t faze me in the least to have it... Wed, 21 Aug 2013 12:16:43 EST What I Control From My Couch Kingdom http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5454248 So some of you know, and some of you don’t, that I have recently had to make best friends with my couch. It is where I have spent my entire life for the past 6 days with the exception of the odd jaunt to the bathroom, a few excruciatingly painful visits to the chiropractor and the final torturous climb up the stairs to bed. My constant companions are my ice pack and tv remote. I have somehow managed to sprain my s.i. joint which apparently are the muscles that connect your hip and your low... Tue, 13 Aug 2013 17:30:22 EST Mullet Dresses Are For the Thin and Pretty http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5438703 My anxiety is building as my brother’s wedding approaches. It’s only 5 weeks away now. This morning I saw on Facebook pics posted from the bachelorette weekend in Niagara that I wasn’t able to attend. It was just too far for me to fly for just a weekend. Looking at the pics just upped my anxiety again. I don’t know any of the other bridesmaids (there are 6 of us in total, which personally I think is kind of ridiculous but hey, it’s not my wedding) so seeing the pics was the first time I’... Tue, 30 Jul 2013 14:22:24 EST T.H.I.N.K.ing of a Kinder World http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5425504 <BR> I’ve been thinking the last few days about one’s ability to express themselves and where they draw the line between their right to say something and whether it does any good to say it. Obviously by law in both the U.S. and Canada we have a right to free speech. We can pretty much say what we want and then claim right to free speech. Whether it offends, harms or hurts anyone doesn’t matter. <BR> <BR> Recently I noticed some kerfuffle (good word hey?) on someone’s blog about the fact... Thu, 18 Jul 2013 15:15:33 EST I Am Choosing To Fake It Till I Make It http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5418000 I don’t know how many times in my life I’ve seen the saying ‘You choose your feelings’. Probably thousands. But it’s only been in the past few months that I have started to really ingest that idea and try to truly make it part of who I am. <BR> <BR> The concept of choosing your feelings seems so foreign to me. It means when someone insults me, I’m supposed to choose how I want to react rather than instantly be angry. Or when someone hurts me, I’m supposed to choose how much and how long... Thu, 11 Jul 2013 15:03:10 EST I Didn't Get the Job and My Garden Paid For It With Its Life http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5411562 I am absolutely deflated. I've got nothing left and I feel completely useless. I don't come first anywhere. Though I have friends and family that love me, I'm not their number 1. To any of them. And I can't even get that feeling professionally. <BR> <BR> After all that work and preparation, I didn't get the job. I was told that my presentation was outstanding but that the other guy had answered slightly better on some of the questions. My manager said some other crap too about how th... Fri, 5 Jul 2013 13:52:53 EST This Is Who I Am - Book http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5409614 If you follow the plus-size model Tess Munster on Facebook, you'll have seen her reference to this book 'This Is Who I Am' by Roseanne Olson. It is a photobook of nude women, all shapes & sizes sharing their stories about body love. I haven't read it yet, but I'm going to try and get a hold of a copy. <BR> <BR> Tess posted her favourite story from the book and I just thought it was awesome too so I wanted to share with all of you. <BR> <BR> May we all collectively raise a new generation... Wed, 3 Jul 2013 12:16:25 EST A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To Bed http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5404647 Yesterday morning didn’t start well and it only seemed to get more stressful as the day went on. I was woken early by my kitty howling in pain because her back hip was hurting her. She has arthritis and I think the recent wet, damp weather has really affected her. I was so upset hearing that sound – it’s an awful sound an animal in pain. I tried to get her to take her kitty motrin but she wasn’t having any of it. I ended up calling my mom to come and kitty-sit because I couldn’t stand th... Fri, 28 Jun 2013 13:31:57 EST A Little Bit Eeyore http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5400442 I’m not really sure what the deal is the past few days but I’m just not feeling as motivated or as sure of myself and my ultimate destination as I did even a few weeks ago. I’ve tried those ‘get motivated’ ideas like read other people’s success stories, change up your music, pick a new exercise activity etc. But I’m just sort of in the doldrums. I haven’t stopped doing my exercising, but I’m not getting that high after it that I was last week and the weeks before it. And I’m not really gi... Mon, 24 Jun 2013 16:53:07 EST Offense Is The Best Defense and How the Pretty People Win http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5396605 Yesterday I met with my career coach for the first time in a few months. He’s not really like your typical career coach because he doesn't just concentrate on career soley, he's a bit more of a counsellor and a life coach. We were talking about what my limiting beliefs were. These are ingrained beliefs that I believe limit me in my ability to be a successful person. Not a career-wise successful person but just a successful person in general as in a good human being that has their sh*t tog... Thu, 20 Jun 2013 18:58:38 EST BLC 22 Vision Board http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5389175 This was an interesting task. I wasn't going to do it at first. But then I decided I wanted to get full marks for the Strong-end challenge so I figured I'd do it. It was more difficult thatn I thought to surf through pictures and decide whether that was something I was striving for or not. It made me pinpoint some of the most important goals. <BR> <BR> These were: <BR> - It's not skinny that I want. I want a strong, healthy body. <BR> - I accept that I will never be a size 2 but that ... Fri, 14 Jun 2013 14:36:03 EST There Are No Pictures of the Future Me http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5385981 <BR> If you’ve had a history of yo-yo dieting like I have, you’ll have pictures of yourself over the years at different weights and in different sizes. And if you’re anything like me, you’ll remember what that weight or size was when you look at the picture. I can pinpoint significant moments in my life and tell you what I weighed at that moment. During first attempt at losing weight, I spent the summer working out like a fiend, eating well and dropping about 40lbs, I started 3rd year univ... Tue, 11 Jun 2013 15:16:08 EST BLC 22 Goals http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5382751 We're supposed to blog our goals for the BLC22 challenge, so for the 12 weeks my goals are: <BR> <BR> 1. Lose 21 lbs. <BR> 2. Lose 4 inches off my waist. <BR> 3. Exercise 250 minutes per week at least. <BR> 4. Strength train at least twice per week. <BR> 5. Eat a minimum of 5 freggies per day. <BR> 6. Track my food every single day. Every single morsel. <BR> 7. Do at least 2 sessions per week of positive thought meditation. <BR> 8. Continue working on the c25k plan with 3 runs a week. Sat, 8 Jun 2013 19:55:47 EST