MICHELLE_391's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=MICHELLE%5F391 MICHELLE_391's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ I need a hug http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5875273 I've really lost my spunk, my drive and my will. I have been depressed for months - as in - on meds, using a happy lamp, and still working very hard to get out of bed in the morning. I find myself asking "what's the point" a whole lot. <BR> <BR> Some days are better than others . Let's just say that my therapist is a saint. <BR> <BR> On Wednesday I had a biometric screening at work. It revealed a fasting blood sugar of 100 - very close to pre-diabetic, cholesterol of 182, but the ratio i... Fri, 13 Feb 2015 18:44:41 EST Sluggish and thinking about time http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5796936 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/4/8/l480712525.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Oh my, this is a hard one. Soooo sluggish today. Sleep last night was horrible. I kept waking up coughing (allergy season) needing to pee (drank the last three cups of water just before bedtime like a dolt) and cramps in my legs (PMS). <BR> <BR> I had to be up reasonably early this morning because the dog's trainer was coming at 10 and I had things I needed to do before then. It was a rough session for him - he'... Sun, 12 Oct 2014 16:40:39 EST Weekend Update http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5796329 Not a very good end to my week. Stress and PMS caught up with me on Thursday and Friday. I didn't track, and I didn't eat very well. Sweets. Not even ones that are worth the calories - not an indulgence, not even a treat. Just sugar. I'm putting a lot of energy today into not beating myself up about this. I'm learning about self-compassion and I'm going to stick with it. <BR> <BR> It feels good to care about myself and to be forgiving. <BR> <BR> I've been doing well with my steps, and tod... Sat, 11 Oct 2014 12:16:09 EST Update to Reckless Morning http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5794292 As I thought, I pretty much didn't get hungry again until around dinner time. Lucky me! I must have had enough protein to protect me from the sugar crash. <BR> <BR> I knew that to get my protein for the day, I was going to have to eat a bunch of it for dinner. This gave me a 400 calorie dinner. And at the end of the day, I'm over calorie by 300. If I allowed Spark to add my fitness to my calorie count, I'd be fine. <BR> <BR> So given my wild and reckless morning, I think I did OK. I got al... Tue, 7 Oct 2014 21:20:51 EST Reckless morning http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5794024 It is 10:38 a.m. and I have 19-365 calories left for the day. At least that includes 31 grams of protein... but...er, 200 carbs. <BR> <BR> Not sure what snapped this morning, but I just wasn't present. I'm a bit stressed, trying to relax.. and not paying attention to myself. <BR> <BR> Look, it's a distinct possibility that I'm going to go at least a bit over calorie today, (Alhough lunch probably won't happen. It won't NEED to happen. I think it will be a while before I'm hungry again.) A... Tue, 7 Oct 2014 11:46:50 EST Inappropriate!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5793438 Lately, I’ve noticed the ads on Spark are becoming intrusive and inappropriate. Ads for diet fasts, “metabolic boost” bars, Snickers, fast food… “You can lose weight with this one ridiculous trick…” <BR> <BR> I know Spark needs to make money – but this is a site about getting healthy. None of the above items are of any interest to me. I can deal with the Zulilly ads and products that might I might actually use. But I don’t want to see fast food, junk and false diet claims on here – it makes ... Mon, 6 Oct 2014 13:48:47 EST No mistakes today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5793068 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/1/l2101090049.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Preach! I have made every mistake in the book when it comes to taking care of myself. I repeat these "mistakes" over and over again. But the quote above makes a very good point. When you know the pitfalls of taking a certain path, taking that path again isn't a mistake, it's a choice. We can choose our happiness, it doesn't have to be granted to us from approval from others or outside forces. If I want to be ha... Sun, 5 Oct 2014 22:33:22 EST Sobering morning leads to serene day. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5792529 My weigh-in day is Saturday. For the first time in a long time, I stepped on the scale and had a sobering experience. I knew I had gained a lot of weight back, but I didn't realize just how much. I now understand what's wrong with my knee. I'm making it work too hard, poor thing. <BR> <BR> I let the feeling sit with me for a few minutes and then reminded myself over and over that the number on the scale doesn't define me. I think that worked - I wasn't down today at all, and I was able to k... Sat, 4 Oct 2014 23:56:11 EST When opportunity strikes... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5791926 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/7/l1787294352.jpg"> <BR> <BR> For the first time since early this summer I embraced the opportunity of a new day. Here's how I made great use of today: <BR> <BR> 1. I get to work from home on Fridays now. And I took the opportunity to sleep another hour! <BR> 2. And I still got to take the dog on a walk a little over a mile <BR> 3. I ate a very healthy breakfast and "got to work" on time. <BR> 4. I used my time wisely, taking little breaks t... Fri, 3 Oct 2014 20:39:48 EST Do Again http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5791327 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/8/l1809786127.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Yup. That's pretty much been my life this year. Right now, I'm back at "do." I've actually been back tracking for a week, but I left blogging and enjoying the other delights of Spark until I could prove to myself that I am in it to win it. <BR> <BR> Today I updated and added substantially to my motivation board, made actual *decisions* about what I was eating, and I'm still planning another 3k steps to finish m... Thu, 2 Oct 2014 21:03:17 EST I am having some serious commitment issues http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5766629 Commitment to friends, family, work, and myself has all gone to the wayside. I’m all about being satisfied right NOW, while, of course, not really being satisfied at all. <BR> <BR> The past six weeks have seen me reverting to old ways of eating and not exercising enough. So many mornings I have promised myself that I will eat well, track food and up my exercise. And by breakfast each day, I have failed. <BR> <BR> My clothes don’t fit well, my stamina is way off, and my body is a big squish... Mon, 25 Aug 2014 09:56:35 EST Low-Key and OK with it. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5732505 Lucky for me that my social circle has become quite small. There was no picnic, no bbq, no party: no issues with being surrounded by unhealthy food in large measure or the empty calories of alcohol. <BR> <BR> In fact, I did quite well yesterday. For whatever reason, I was super groggy yesterday and spent way too much time in bed. But I got my steps in, actually did some housework and then went out for Thai and a movie with a friend. I was very measured (pun intended) about dinner. We ordere... Sat, 5 Jul 2014 12:05:25 EST Still alive http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5731189 Just wanted to pop in quickly and say I'm still around. But very round. I've really been neglecting myself (and Spark) in the past week or so, and that's a bad thing. <BR> <BR> I'm sure I've gained around 5 lbs due to eating whatever comes to mind and barely moving - I haven't crossed 10K steps since last Friday, I think. <BR> <BR> I so need to get my brain back in order. NOW! Thu, 3 Jul 2014 09:40:27 EST There is a question at the end of this blog. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5724069 Coming back to work after a week off isn’t easy. Getting out of bed at 4:45, getting dressed, walking the dog, driving in – all took extra time today as I dragged my butt around. I’m completely tuned out here at work – as in, I haven’t really started doing any work, and it is 10:15. <BR> <BR> Having friends out there who are un- or under employed, I feel bad about admitting this. <BR> <BR> Upon my return, I found out that many shenanigans happened in the past week. Nothing too new, just th... Mon, 23 Jun 2014 11:31:37 EST Catching up http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5723630 Wowie zowie! I've been out of touch for about a week now and it has felt really strange. I'm glad to be back in the swing of things. I need to read bunches of blogs and catch up with all of you! <BR> <BR> I spent the last week out in rural PA visiting my family. My sister's son graduated from high school, and a cousin of ours graduated as well, but she also had a clarinet concert featuring work by her dad. Shopping at DE outlet malls (NO SALES TAX ON CLOTHING) was fAN tastic, and good sister... Sun, 22 Jun 2014 20:45:13 EST Hunger: why not to analyze it. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5715230 Boy am I glad I did some cooking over my long weekend. I got home with a growling belly and was desperate to eat. Three minutes later, I had warmed up my yummy lentils and rice, and I'm a happy camper. <BR> <BR> I'm at the low end, but within my calories today, and I ate really good, filling food all day, so I'm not sure what that was about. I barely got any exercise. I guess it doesn't matter, if I'm hungry, I'm hungry. <BR> <BR> Funny, hunger. It is actually a normal response to it being... Tue, 10 Jun 2014 20:11:48 EST Monday, Monday (La, la, la, la, la, la) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5714190 For starters, this makes me sad: <BR> <BR> Uno's Chicago Grill Classic Deep Dish Individual Pizza - Chicago style pizza is delicious and selecting an individual pizza can seem like a great way to limit the nutritional damage. When you are talking about deep pizza, it is important to remember that all that space provides plenty of room for extra cheese, sauce, and toppings, which contribute over 2,300 calories, 165 grams of fat and 4, 920 mg of sodium as well. <BR> <BR> I read this in a Spar... Mon, 9 Jun 2014 12:26:10 EST Extra Lazy Saturday http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5713066 This week was as difficult as I expected it to be. I didn't always eat right, I didn't always get my water, and I certainly didn't get my exercise in, but I got through it, and I'm happy enough that. Well, not so much happy as relieved. <BR> <BR> I need to search around Spark to see if there is a stress group. I need to learn to deal with my stress better. I'm now having work dreams, nightmares, and just not sleeping very well. In fact, last night was so bad, I managed to pull the featherbed... Sat, 7 Jun 2014 21:36:26 EST An epistolary blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5710836 Original message <BR> Hello - My Fitbit One stopped tracking my steps today. It has a full charge. I tried resetting it a couple of times, but nothing changes. Do you have any other advice? <BR> <BR> __________________________________ <BR> <BR> <BR> Hi Michelle, <BR> <BR> We are sorry to hear that your Fitbit One has stopped tracking your steps. <BR> <BR> To better investigate this issue, please perform an accuracy test by doing the following: <BR> <BR> 1. Put your Fitbit on your hip ... Wed, 4 Jun 2014 21:52:31 EST My Fitbit broke my heart. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5710051 As I suspected, this is a tough week. I haven't really been tracking nutrition well enough, and just yesterday my Fitbit died. It no longer tracks steps. I contacted Fitbit for help, and they need me to send them a receipt for them to send a replacement. Of course, I don't have the receipt any more. :-( <BR> <BR> I'm hoping they take pity on me. <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> Tue, 3 Jun 2014 21:43:57 EST When the outside doesn't match the inside: looking like a zombie, but feeling human. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5708118 I feel human today!!!!! After having slept most of the day away yesterday, I woke up this morning feeling almost rested. I think the vitamins are starting to work. I wish I could check my iron levels like I check my weight. I'd love to actually see progress - not just feel it. I'm still white, white, white, in the face and I've still got my dark circles and wonky nails. <BR> <BR> But OMG feeling it IS SO IMPORTANT. It's lovely. <BR> <BR> It is really hot out today. Just to think that just ... Sun, 1 Jun 2014 13:39:38 EST Blah http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5707614 Saturday - very, very lazy. Very tired. Usually Saturday is my fun, energetic day. <BR> <BR> The last two days were horrible at work. An incredible amount of stress because of unrealistic expectations, miscommunications looming deadlines and angry, angry people. I even brought work home to do, which I haven't yet. I was going to do it today, but I just now decided that it can wait until tomorrow. <BR> <BR> Next week will be super hectic and then I think things calm down for a bit. <BR> <... Sat, 31 May 2014 18:08:06 EST “Rage, rage against the dying of the light” http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5705301 Ok, with all due respect to Dylan Thomas, the title of my blog today is something I’m trying desperately to do. The light I speak of lives inside of me and wants me to be healthy and be happy with the way I look. Sometimes it shines so brightly and fills me with energy, joy and determination. <BR> <BR> Sometimes the light starts to dim and die out. I lose perspective on who I am and what I want and why any of it matters. And that’s when life becomes a struggle. <BR> <BR> My self-esteem was... Wed, 28 May 2014 14:40:33 EST Exciting retro-action http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5703733 OK, so I cheated a bit. I had to jump on the scale this morning, just to see if I really REALLY hadn't lost a single pound in the last week. I'm glad I did, because I did - I lost a single pound. <BR> <BR> Today I invested in some retro technology. My VCR. It has been malfunctioning for about a year, but since I've been ignoring my step aerobics for a very long time, I haven't really cared. I've invested in some DVDs, but I have my favorites, and they aren't available on DVD. So I got a bug... Mon, 26 May 2014 18:14:18 EST One pound preventing a tailspin? Obsessive tracking? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5702853 Weigh in day: Zero pounds lost. Gah! I guess those three days of eating with wild abandon caught up with me and I'm just happy I didn't gain any poundage. It's too early in this round to have a "failure." Seriously, I think it would put me in a tailspin of "see? it makes no difference how I eat or live my life. I'm doomed to fatness." <BR> <BR> Is that true? No. I know it to be false. But emotions are by definition not rational. <BR> <BR> Yesterday was a very good day. I tracked 20,500 st... Sun, 25 May 2014 14:13:54 EST Stink eye http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5702093 It is a bright and beautiful Saturday morning. I slept until 8, stayed in bed until 8:30 and took the boy for a short potty break. We're going to take a long walk today, first to the park to play ball, then to go buy him some wet food. <BR> <BR> I was led to believe that I was meeting up with a friend of mine from out of town this morning, but it turns out that she's in a conference this morning and hasn't yet told me when she's going to be done. Color me pissed! I could have had other pla... Sat, 24 May 2014 11:32:33 EST Back in the saddle day... I don't know anymore! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5701719 I'm going to have to start getting more creative about my blog titles, because it seems I can't count past 17. <BR> <BR> The business trip went extremely well - the business part of it. I had a zillion meetings, met some really great people, but had a ton of stress, as my regular work still has to go on. <BR> <BR> The health part was abysmal. I set myself up to succeed, but I didn't even track the two days I was there. I started off healthy - oatmeal and fruit for breakfast, lunch at a re... Fri, 23 May 2014 21:35:24 EST Back in the saddle, day 17 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5698785 Here I am, in America's heartland. I made it, I'm alive, and boy am I tired. <BR> <BR> I made 15,000+ steps today, thanks to having the time to walk my dog to daycare/boarding, walking home, and walking around at the airport. I figured if I was going to have to wait for a delayed flight, I might as well make some use of my time! <BR> <BR> I really, really hope that the calorie alotment for today is correct, because I ate just over 2000 calories. The tracker says I can eat something like 2,... Mon, 19 May 2014 22:32:02 EST Back in the saddle, day 17 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5697923 Another good day. Unfortunately, I didn't sleep well, but I did make up for it in the form of a nap this afternoon. <BR> <BR> During the dog's morning walk, I discovered that the neighborhood was having a huge garage sale. I'm not sure how I missed this info. So instead of a brisk walk, we did a leisurely stroll through the neighborhood, meeting people and looking at stuff. I didn't see anything I couldn't live without. But it was good to get out and mix with people in the area. It was good ... Sun, 18 May 2014 21:37:47 EST Back in the saddle, day 16 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5697338 'twas a very good day, this one. Up early, walk the boy, off to a board meeting, then a nap, and then a 2.5 hour walk with the boy. A very good dinner, a little Glee, and now I'm doing laundry. So much laundry. The problem with laundry is that it is never truly done, unless you become a nudist. <BR> <BR> There are no plans for that in my future. <BR> <BR> TOM hormones took over my day yesterday afternoon, but I was back at it today. Sure, I had milk chocolate covered peanut butter pretzels... Sat, 17 May 2014 23:00:03 EST Back in the saddle, day 15 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5696380 Doing so well, feeling so crappy. Now that I know what my problem is, I feel worse. That’s the problem with me – I have a bit of hypochondria. It’s the thought that counts. Yes, I’ve been tired and weak and scatterbrained for months, but now that I know I’m anemic, I feel worse. <BR> <BR> Honestly, I’m just looking forward to the weekend when I can sleep. <BR> <BR> Things are going quite well nutritionally. I’ve now been back on the site for 2 weeks, and I’ve tracked my food and stayed wit... Fri, 16 May 2014 11:57:07 EST Back in the saddle day #13 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5695762 Boy I slept well last night, but I could have kept on sleeping. In fact, I’ve been positively exhausted for the past few months and can’t seem to get enough sleep. Now I know why. <BR> <BR> I got my blood test back, and it turns out that only one of my concerns was founded in truth. The cholesterol and all – fine. Seriously, fine. I don’t know the numbers, but I’ll get the report in the mail. <BR> <BR> The numbers I do know are this: Ferritin 4, Hemoglobin 6. THIS is why I am always tired, ... Thu, 15 May 2014 14:24:53 EST Back in the saddle day 12 - UPDATE http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5694987 So far, I'm managing today. Last night, for whatever reason, I could NOT fall asleep and when I did, I had all kinds of odd dreams. Needless to say that today I am a trainwreck in slow motion. <BR> <BR> Today it is my dedicated effort not to rely on sweets, carbs, and crap to stay awake. Well, ok, I am allowing myself a diet soda, because without the caffeine, I'll never make the 30 mile drive home alive. <BR> <BR> And I forgot my lunch today, but I did bring my breakfast and snacks. Betw... Wed, 14 May 2014 14:05:07 EST Back in the saddle, day 11 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5694417 Nearly two weeks and I've only lost one pound. I suppose I should be happy with this, considering I haven't been very consistent or mindful. <BR> <BR> Very soon though, I am going to have an eye-opener that will get my butt in gear. I went to the lady doctor yesterday, and although I wasn't expecting it, she ran a CBC blood test along with some others. I'm betting a few things: <BR> <BR> 1. Low iron and or feritin <BR> 2. High cholesterol/bad ratio <BR> 3. High triglycerides <BR> 4. High ... Tue, 13 May 2014 20:50:22 EST Back in the saddle, day 9 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5691947 SATURDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <BR> <BR> Eventually, I'll give my blog titles a bit more thought. I'm just using the "back in the saddle" titles to remind myself that it's early in this bend on my road, and that I need to be kind and patient with myself. Not lenient, but kind and patient. <BR> <BR> So yesterday was another binge day. Is this hormonal? It shouldn't be. I could be reacting to Mother's Day. I'm really feeling the loss of my mother this year. It's been 14 years, and I've been OK f... Sat, 10 May 2014 12:35:11 EST Back in the saddle, day 7 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5690502 I expressed optimism too soon. <BR> <BR> Yesterday was a complete and utter fail. After setting myself for success, eating all the healthy, tracked foods I’d prepared and packed that had me firmly set for the middle of my calorie range, I “needed” Oreos. The need was overwhelming. Every cell in my brain was crying out for them. <BR> <BR> But I didn’t listen. Instead, I drank a lot of water and tried to ride it out, but 30 minutes later, the pleasure center of my brain was screaming out – C... Thu, 8 May 2014 11:19:46 EST Back in the saddle, day 6 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5689679 Tomorrow will make it a whole week since I've returned to a responsible and healthy lifestyle. So far, I haven't really hit any road blocks or cravings I couldn't resist, but I know those are coming. My resolve is always strongest when I begin anything. <BR> <BR> Today I have a Benedryl hangover, and I don't understand why. Yeah, I took the stuff, but I've never felt hung over the next morning. I don't like it, but it is better than not sleeping because I'm up with a cough. <BR> <BR> As a ... Wed, 7 May 2014 10:39:40 EST Back in the saddle, day 4 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5687872 SO not in the mood for Monday morning. It is raining – and cold. Again. Note to the universe: Get with the program! APRIL showers bring May flowers. <BR> <BR> As a result, I’m spending time on Spark right now – I’ll get to the work I’m supposed to do in this office in a bit. When I’m in the mood. <BR> <BR> I’m starting to get some comments on my posts and thank you! It is nice to have the encouragement. Some people who have stopped by have locked profiles, so it’s hard to express gratitud... Mon, 5 May 2014 09:44:55 EST Back in the saddle, day 3 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5687514 It has been easier to get back into the Spark groove than I thought it might be. Measuring, tracking, thinking - I know all this. It is second nature to me when I decide I'm going to do it! Just like riding a bicycle. <BR> <BR> The challenge for me was that I went out for two meals this weekend. Dinner on Saturday and brunch today. Brunch was a buffet and was really easy to track. There was a lot of fruit, and I took advantage of the first watermelon of the season. MY LORD it was wonderful. ... Sun, 4 May 2014 21:35:50 EST Back in the saddle, day 2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5686394 I woke up this morning hungry and stuffy - stuffy, yeah, I get that. It is high allergy season for me. Thanks to Sudafed, I'll be feeling better soon. <BR> <BR> Hungry? I never wake up hungry. My body doesn't want food first thing. Coffee? Sure, but food? I was slightly under calorie yesterday because 1) I was overcautious, 2) I synced my activity to my calorie count and didn't notice my intake goal had changed. One day certainly won't kill me. <BR> <BR> Breakfast this morning - I'm decid... Sat, 3 May 2014 11:00:28 EST What a diffrence a year makes! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5686025 My last blog was a little over a year ago. In that time, I dealt with some nearly crippling depression and isolation. I started a job and am still in that job - I survived a bad boss and just got a shiny new one. My life has once again become my job During the week, I have very little spare time. <BR> <BR> I leave home at 6:15 and get home about 6:30. 2-3 hours of driving a day and a high-stress job leave me very tired. I come home at night, play with the dog, eat in front of the TV and go ... Fri, 2 May 2014 20:51:10 EST Still struggling. Sick of it. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5287853 I’m just so phoning it in today. I’ve had a very busy week, stressful on all fronts, and I just can’t bring myself to concentrate or do any work. Probably not something I should be writing on a work computer, eh? Brain fog has taken over. <BR> <BR> I weighed myself this morning to find that I’ve gained 5 pounds since starting my job. This is not good news, but it gave me the extra kick in the butt to find out why I still haven’t been granted access to the fitness room here in the building. ... Fri, 15 Mar 2013 14:33:47 EST Tuesday Morning http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5283668 Thanks for the encouragement and ideas guys! I need them right now. I am just baffled about how I can fit in more fitness. <BR> <BR> Yesterday was a STELLAR food day, and I've set myself up to have another one today. Steps were way too low at just under 7000. <BR> <BR> I thought the steps would be higher because I went and did my grocery shopping for the week during lunch. I walked around the perimeter of the store and then up and down every aisle. I AM doing really well with the flights ... Tue, 12 Mar 2013 09:38:06 EST Just a quickie http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5282242 Hello long-lost Sparkers! <BR> <BR> I guess I'm the one who is lost, or have been. I have to say it has been tough going. I still haven't gotten access to the health club here (WHY!?!) and haven't been able to figure out how and when to fit real fitness into my day. I'm not walking my full 10,000 steps a day several days of the week - mostly because of the weather. <BR> <BR> The little 10-minute videos here and there help a bit, but I just can't count them as a "real" workout. They are jus... Mon, 11 Mar 2013 09:24:06 EST Turn that Frown Upside Down - all day! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5248260 Today was one of those days where I just couldn't get out of bed. I was sluggish, didn't feel like starting my day, but then I did, and was well paid for it. <BR> <BR> No, not in cash, but in kind. It was a classic "turn that frown upside down" kind of day. For example, all I wanted to do was eat all day. I was actually hungry. I had eaten my breakfast, my mid-morning snack, part of my lunch, and an unplanned extra snack by 10:30. (The unplanned snack was coffee that I had with 2% milk and s... Tue, 12 Feb 2013 21:07:35 EST First Month at the Job - I'm starting to come to life! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5246929 Remember me? <BR> <BR> Actually, some of you really DO take the time to remember me, even when I'm not communicating on the site. Thank you for keeping me connected and for not giving up on me! <BR> <BR> <em>247</em> <BR> <BR> I've had the job for a month now, and it is really going well. The honeymoon period is coming to an end, I feel it, but that's OK. There is no such thing as a perfect situation, so I'm kind of glad the warts are starting to show. But these warts are no where near... Mon, 11 Feb 2013 20:50:49 EST Does it have to be money OR my life?? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5237822 In my last post I was ecstatic at how well I was doing with fitness minutes. <BR> <BR> Now I'm afraid to look, because this: <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/4/l244186841.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Is the reality of a desk job and 2 1/2 hours of driving. <BR> Mon, 4 Feb 2013 21:14:20 EST Sharing a moment of intense pride http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5216147 This past month, my life has been upended. My routines have all changed. I have new job that requires me to spend lots of time sitting at a desk, and I have at least a 90-minute commute every day. <BR> <BR> While I'm thrilled at the changes in my life, I've been concerned that I was going to become sedentary, and that the very physical life that I'd been building during my 10 months of unemployment would be sabotaged against these odds. <BR> <BR> My friends, I have been unable to do real, ... Sun, 20 Jan 2013 21:31:39 EST Aaaand Exhale http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5209083 I'm happy to report that I'm back to nearly normal now. After a very good night's sleep and some positive thinking, I woke up fever free and clear-headed. The cough is lingering as are the sniffles, but I feel human. <BR> <BR> Today was a great day in all respects. It was great to get in the office and get my hands dirty. People are actually expressing gratitude that I'm there! This is so new to me... I'm starting to like it instead of being suspicious. I think I work better when I know I'm ... Tue, 15 Jan 2013 21:31:33 EST WaaaaaCHOoooooooo http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5207435 Why anyone follows my blog remains a mystery to me. I am so completely inconsistent. Life is changing, and I'm struggling a bit to be flexible to bend with the wind instead of breaking in two. <BR> <BR> The only working out I have done lately is what my fitbit says I've been doing. And for the past week that hasn't been very much. <BR> <BR> See, all was going well with me and the new job. I had two lovely but busy days in Pittsburgh, then I came home and had a lovely day in the new office.... Mon, 14 Jan 2013 21:23:23 EST