MEL_UNRAU's SparkPeople Blog MEL_UNRAU's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Here we go again... I've not been super active on SP since the birth of my daughter nearly 5 years ago. I continue to check in, kind of lurk, spin the wheel (current log in streak, 704 days!)... just to keep a touch stone on my health and fitness, but the sense of community that I had built up before my daughter was born has evaporated here. I've not found the team that I click with again, because so many people come and go. <BR> <BR> Well, Saturday, Oct 22 I was out for a run. I was training for my 5th mara... Thu, 3 Nov 2016 09:06:49 EST The Biggest Loser I confess I have deep mistrust of the show Biggest Loser. And yet, season after season, I eventually come around to watching it. So, here I am, starting season 16. I am unsure of these new trainers. I mean, come on! Jessie is a smoker! How can he be an example of healthy lifestyles?! And he has carefully crafted his image to be a marketable TV personality. I don't like him. But, Jen! Well. I have a new hero. I looked her up. Her stats? Mine. She's my height AND my weight. That is what 150... Fri, 9 Jan 2015 10:30:23 EST Back at it... The big kid headed back to school this morning. So, now that there has been a turn in the tide in health, I decided to get back to it. Fitness and health 2015 has commenced! <BR> <BR> I took it easy, though. I am easing myself back in, so as to not get sicker from being tired. I did 2.5 walking miles and some light upper body ST over 45 minutes. That's it. That is the level at which I will work this week. Next week, I'll kick it up a bit, as I can... and so on, and so forth, as I rebui... Mon, 5 Jan 2015 09:56:40 EST Resolutions? Oh guys! <BR> <BR> It's resolution time. Can I tell you the truth?? I have no resolutions for this year yet! Okay. Not entirely true. I have one resolution. I plan to spend less time on my phone around my children and husband. When I'm alone, that's different, but with the family, I am drastically cutting my phone time. <BR> <BR> But... <BR> <BR> I like having some fitness resolutions and I just don't have one for 2015. I have a couple of goals I'd like to achieve, but I don't know how ... Thu, 1 Jan 2015 19:06:38 EST Reintroducing myself! I know, it's a crazy time to do this. That I could just keep at my routine through the holidays and maintain this pace, but I need to get back on the WL bandwagon. <BR> <BR> Anywho! <BR> I'm Melanie, a 37 year old stay at home mom to two of my own and nanny to another! I started my journey after my son was born nearly 8 years ago now. I lost over half my body weight over 4 years and lots of failures, before getting pregnant with baby 2. Who is now, nearly 3 years old! After my little ladyb... Tue, 25 Nov 2014 11:36:03 EST My last few weeks Have looked like this <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> And then like this <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> and then I got all of this <BR> <img src=""> <BR> Which weighed about 3 tons. Literally. <BR> <BR> And I moved it all to here and made this <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I got t... Fri, 6 Jun 2014 14:04:12 EST LIGHTBULB MOMENT!!! What has changed in my routine? <BR> What has lead to my over eating? <BR> What area of my plan have I not been doing for a couple weeks? <BR> When did I start gaining weight a bit? <BR> <BR> <BR> <em>189</em> <em>3</em> <em>189</em> <em>3</em> <em>189</em> <em>3</em> <em>189</em> <em>3</em> <BR> <BR> I stopped tracking my food!!! <BR> I usually only track M-F as Sat and Sun are always difficult to predict, but even on those days, I was tracking the foods I knew. <... Tue, 3 Jun 2014 13:37:20 EST Coming clean-- Okay... I've been killing it with my steps of late. Seriously, no cheating lots and lots and lots of steps. 15-22k every day but one last week. But, I'm not working out. I'm eating crap. I'm sure I'm gaining weight, but I can't bear to check. <BR> <BR> Last week was TOM and I started feeling gross and bloated then, but now it's over and it isn't going away. <BR> <BR> And the reason I'm not working out? I'm terrified. I've got an ankle that's bugging me and I'm afraid it's broken.... Mon, 2 Jun 2014 15:35:59 EST Titanium Girl v2 This is the second year (and final year actually) that I participated in the Titanium Girl Challenge. It is running two Half Marathons in one week. One is an all women's HM which is why the challenge is only open to women-- <BR> <BR> I ran my second race yesterday. <BR> I finished in 2:29:06 <BR> I finished the first race in 2:31:31 <BR> <BR> Last year, I finished both races at 2:15 and 2:20. Which means, my times this year are much slower than last year. And it really got me thinking ... Mon, 5 May 2014 09:39:58 EST Less than Stellar Yesterday, food wise was less than stellar, thanks to anniversary cake and potatoes. <BR> <BR> I didn't start my journaling yet. I need to do that today. I will find a note book and start journaling at my noon meal. Actually-- look-- there's one right there! Above my head. I'll use that and write what I had for breakfast. <BR> <BR> And I failed in another way with my food last night. It wasn't the worst thing I've ever done, but, I made a decision to do it. I knew what I was doi... Wed, 26 Mar 2014 09:01:26 EST The Demon It is amazing what a decent night's sleep will do for a person. <BR> <BR> I've made some decisions. <BR> <BR> I dropped out of a WL challenge. The last thing I need at this moment is an artificial pressure to succeed. <BR> <BR> I've got an appointment with my doctor on Thursday. I'll talk about the possibility of going back on my medication. I haven't used them since 2010, but I do not want this to get worse and if I need them for a while again, then I need them for a while again. <BR> ... Tue, 25 Mar 2014 09:05:58 EST Feeling a failure I feel like quitting. <BR> I feel awful. <BR> I feel like I'm an ugly, fat, hideous human being. <BR> <BR> I had a panic attack on Saturday night. <BR> After which follows a period of depression. <BR> It will likely last a week or two and then I will start to gain ground against the darkness. <BR> But, things look bleak right now. <BR> <BR> I know it's a chemical thing in my brain. I've been dealing with this for years. Years and years and years. <BR> <BR> But, it's been 18 months ... Mon, 24 Mar 2014 10:08:28 EST Changing how I log fitness??? I am enjoying my fitbit. I like the fact that it does link to SP and I can just click a button and upload my fitness for the day... but, I always go in and edit it, because it gives me SO many minutes and calories burned... because just being "active" for one minute counts as a minute when you upload. But, it's getting old already to edit the time and calories burned (and doing the MATH!) <BR> <BR> So do I just change my view on my fitness minutes and just upload and accept that my minutes... Thu, 13 Mar 2014 18:11:35 EST So it goes Thus ends the great SparkPeople Activity Tracker v. fitBit debate. <BR> <BR> My 6 year old had been begging to wear a tracker on and off for a while now. I let him wear my SPAT for an hour at Jump Rope For Heart night at the school last night. Annnnddd... It's gone. I went back to check the gym and I couldn't find it. I talked to the principal and she was going to have the custodian check as he swept, but... I don't have a ton of faith that it will turn up. <BR> <BR> I'm trying to not be up... Sat, 1 Mar 2014 05:24:11 EST One Day Comparison I got my Zip yesterday. <BR> <BR> Today is the first day of wearing both my Zip and Spark People Activity Tracker (SPAT). It's been a busy day, with grocery shopping, library story time, a long workout, and laundry. I've been on my feet a lot. <BR> <BR> The SPAT says I've done 19,478 steps and burned 1,075 calories through ALL activity with 824 of those being "workout calories". It says I've "worked out" for 107 minutes. <BR> <BR> The Zip says I've done 21,009 steps and burned 2,422 cal... Thu, 20 Feb 2014 18:02:16 EST Cleaning house!!! There was a time in my life where being a "spark celeb" was on the horizon and I added friends, right and left. It was important to be important. <BR> <BR> Today, I just sat down and deleted inactive folks, people I've never actually had any interactions with and the like. I needed to clean house. I needed to know that my friends list are people that are actually my spark family and to make it easier to reconnect and get active on spark in more than just a tracking capacity. So, I'm sorr... Thu, 13 Feb 2014 17:37:15 EST One pound!!! It's been a while since I've been weighing in regularly. I decided last week that I would start weighing in on Thursdays and to keep myself accountable and to help me stay on track. <BR> <BR> Last week I weighed 152.6. <BR> Today I weighed 151.4. <BR> <BR> It's been a while since I've done this and seen the scale go down instead of up. I'm happy. <BR> <BR> It's just a pound, but it's my pound. I did what I needed to do to lose a pound and I lost a pound. <BR> <BR> Huzzah! Thu, 6 Feb 2014 09:02:05 EST Another day of yurk! Tis the season. <BR> Another day, another illness. <BR> <BR> I am getting super tired of this. <BR> It seems like every year in our family there's one person who gets EVERYTHING. This year, it's me. <BR> <BR> It works like this. My hubby and kids will get the sniffles and a minor cough. I'll wind up with bronchitis. My hubby and kids will get a little upset stomach and gas. I'll wind up with the full fledged stomach virus. <BR> <BR> I'm so tired of it. <BR> <BR> I've decided that F... Mon, 3 Feb 2014 09:26:26 EST Feeling frustrated It's so annoying!!! <BR> <BR> I know all about it. I know why this is happening, don't get me wrong. But dang if it isn't one of the most annoying, frustrating pRts of the journey! <BR> <BR> You kick things into high gear. You buckle down. Watch what you are eating, like a hawk. You renew your commitment to exercise and you are killing it! ST and cardio. Alternating. Getting it all in. <BR> <BR> And you gain weight. <BR> I know about DOMS. <BR> I'm always telling people that it is part... Tue, 28 Jan 2014 10:27:40 EST Hungry! There was a time in my life where I could handle being hungry. I'm not talking low blood sugar, suffering, hangry kind of hunger. But, that normal, it's been a few hours since I've eaten kind of hunger. <BR> <BR> And I can't any more. I hate being hungry. I've gotten used, once again to constant food intake and hunger is an evil to be eliminated at all costs, immediately. <BR> <BR> No more. I'm working on being okay with being hungry again. Today is the first day and I made it to lunch w... Thu, 16 Jan 2014 12:35:00 EST Influenza and worries! I know that I am not the most up to date on this blog thing... or checking others blogs and all that... I rarely sit at my computer any more and do this. I SPARK mobile most of the time and I hate reading on my phone, let alone writing on it. But, I've really wished I had a friend to talk to about this... and I don't, so I'm talking to you about it and hoping that someone might read it and understand. <BR> <BR> I had the flu. Like H1N1 flu. Big time. It's the sickest I can remember being... Wed, 8 Jan 2014 14:39:47 EST Ok, you're a runner... I suppose if you are a runner, you have probably read Chad Stafko's article in the WSJ about being a runner. If you haven't, you can read it here. <link><BR>424052702304448204579186401818882202 </link> He really sounds very angry at us. And states that we are glory hounds, in this because it is visible and we can be seen by every car, leaf raker, etc. <BR> <BR> I read a "translation" of his article, which basically says "He's really angry." It's funny a... Sun, 17 Nov 2013 15:10:04 EST Marathon Girl! I did it! I did it! <BR> <BR> I finished my first FULL MARATHON! 26.2 miles done in one go! I finished in 5:55:33, so I am not any kind of speed demon, but I finished! I FINISHED! I set a goal to complete a full marathon in 2013 and I did it! <BR> <BR> It was crazy. It was fun. It was awful. And it was amazing! <BR> <BR> I woke up at 4:30 AM. I drank a coffee, ate an English Muffin and egg. I got dressed. I woke my hubby up and the kids at 5:30 then we drove the hour to Baltim... Mon, 14 Oct 2013 10:31:29 EST Insight! I am ruled by the scale. I live or die by the number on that little machine. I've gotten past the point where it gives my life value or not, but darn it... It's been driving me crazy that I cannot get back down into the 130s. Let alone the 120s, where I was 30 months ago... before I gained a few pounds to get pregnant, then 9 months of pregnancy, and now 19 months of beautiful wonderful Miss A. <BR> <BR> I am stuck. I am easily, comfortably, maintaining a 145. Plus a pound here, or mi... Fri, 30 Aug 2013 14:19:26 EST Logging back in... I'm back from vacation. <BR> I've got lots of pics. <BR> I had a ton of fun. <BR> I gained a ton of cheese and bread kilos. <BR> I'm jet lagged beyond words. <BR> Laundry drying on the line. <BR> Costco shopping done. <BR> Aldi's shopping still to do. <BR> Grateful for Spark's August back on track challenge. <BR> It's what I need right now. <BR> More to come. <BR> When I'm not so tired I can barely see. <BR> Fri, 2 Aug 2013 14:35:22 EST A Spark Sabbatical Hey Friends! <BR> I'm taking a brief sabbatical... known as a REAL vacation. We won't have tons of internet accessibility while I'm gone, so I'm going to be out of touch for a while. I'll be back the first full week of August. I tell you, so that I can get snarky comments on my page if I claim jet lag for longer than that. <BR> <BR> In other big news... <BR> <BR> I registered for a full marathon. Making the leap. I'm planning on going in as a "walker" rather than a runner, because I f... Thu, 18 Jul 2013 15:54:36 EST Oy! It hurts. Alrighty folks. I have a tendency for all or nothingness. I push and push and push, well into "pain" hoping that I can come out on the other side of it-- because I've set a goal! <BR> <BR> Today's goal was 20k steps or more. I did 25k Sunday. 17k yesterday. And I'm at 13k already today. 7k more to go. Which would normally mean a second workout to make goal. But, I hurt. My feet hurt. My back hurts. Everything feels pushed and strained. So, the steps will fall where they may today. And maybe ... Tue, 9 Jul 2013 13:16:11 EST PLEASE! PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE!!! Be DOMS. Please, Pretty Pretty Please, be DOMS. <BR> <BR> I've been keeping on track with eating! I've been throwing away left overs of things like pizza when we've had them (rather than saving them for a lunch). I got a salad at McDonalds yesterday, rather than a burger and fries like everyone else. <BR> <BR> I've been kicking my own bum. I'm trying to see if I can get up to 20 miles in one day by mid August to see if I register for half or full marathon in October. I'm up to 12.5.... Mon, 8 Jul 2013 09:43:31 EST Wagon Wednesday, ummm... Thursday So, I missed yesterday. I was busy, busy. I got in 20,200 steps by the time I took of my pedometer last night. The kids were crazy busy and the neighbor got robbed and I had his kid here for a while and it was just hectic. I remembered as I was rolling into bed that I hadn't blogged, so I promised myself I would blog first chance today. <BR> <BR> So, I've done really well with my food journal. I've written everything, I think, for the last week. I've been killing it with exercise. I started... Thu, 4 Jul 2013 11:22:07 EST Owning up. I know! It's not Wednesday, and I'm blogging. <BR> <BR> Mostly because I felt emotionally strong enough to step on the scale this morning. 147.4. I'm up 5 lbs from my "okay, time to stop and spend some time maintaining" weight. Which means, I'm not doing awesome at maintaining... which I knew... but now I've got some hard numbers to look at and deal with. <BR> <BR> I wrote in my food journal this morning, again...and that thing is going to have to be more prominint in my life. I may hat... Fri, 28 Jun 2013 11:17:12 EST Wagon Wednesday III So, another week, another post... <BR> <BR> This week, I've been better than of late. <BR> <BR> I actually used my food journal. Not consistently or any where near it... but it actually got written in! <BR> <BR> I've done several workouts. I'm both rowing and using my old at home workouts. I even went for one long walk/light jog. I'm building back up. <BR> There is a running event in late October that I think I am going to participate in. I am going to wait until August to decide... Wed, 26 Jun 2013 15:13:15 EST Wagon Wednesdays Part Deux Well... I did TERRIBLE at keeping my food journal and eating. I didn't do so hot on working out the last half of the week, either. It seems like I keep having really valid excuses to eat poorly. Normal Friday night pizza, then a mom date on Saturday, then my sister and nieces came into town on Sunday and so we ate out with them. Monday, I took them out to the airport and it was over the lunch hour so the kids and I hit IKEA for meatballs on the way home. I had a doctor's appointment yeste... Wed, 19 Jun 2013 17:46:47 EST Wagon Wednesdays I got back on the wagon again today. <BR> I've been on and off so many times of late, it's no wonder I'm struggling. My weight is all over the place and I'm munching on things when I'm not hungry and I had a realization this week that perhaps, my old binge eating issues are rearing their ugly heads. So, it's time to start making some old changes again. <BR> <BR> The first of which is, I am going to be accountable here, by blogging at least once a week on "Wagon Wednesdays". <BR> <BR> I am... Wed, 12 Jun 2013 15:47:04 EST nothing like clothes shopping... to make one fell a sense of impending doom. <BR> <BR> Massive amounts of prep to make me not feel like dog doo before heading out. <BR> Dye the hair. <BR> Pluck the eyebrows. <BR> Shave every last hair. <BR> Self tanning lotion. <BR> Actual make up. <BR> <BR> Those fitting room lights are harsh. I stupidly asked my niece to come with me and help me shop. She's 19, and a model. I'm a nearly 36 year old mother of 2 with sags and bags and she thinks I should shop at American Apparel! Ummm... Fri, 10 May 2013 10:41:53 EST A rant on the gender disconnect about weight Warning: allusions to very strong language ahead. I don't usually USE words like this aloud, I think them. But, some times, I don't know what else to say. And many are ACTUAL quotes. <BR> <BR> A friend posted on a gaming site about how she thought thought they were being inconsistent saying "Women should play video games! It's cool!" while at the same time posting pictures mocking heavy women in cosplay. The admin of the site went off on her for being offended. She pointed out that in ... Wed, 13 Mar 2013 10:07:51 EST Setting a Goal Weight That's it. I've decided. I've figured out what my goal weight is. When I get there, I am done. Period. No more trying to lose "just a couple more". <BR> <BR> I have been within the same 5 lbs for 7 months now. I keep gaining and losing it. Oh, wait... that is maintaining isn't it? Yep it is. So, even though I didn't realize it, I am practicing what maintaining my weight will look like. <BR> <BR> Funny thing is, despite having set a goal weight, I have no idea what it is. I am t... Tue, 12 Mar 2013 12:45:11 EST equal to the effort I know I've not been "active" as of late... posting or keeping up with friends, so it may be that there is no one out there who will read this. I would like to say that I will be more active and I hope I will, but things are SO different now from when I was posting every day and being so active. And it has been hard. Really Hard. HARD. To be active on Spark People. To be active in my life. <BR> <BR> I've been losing and gaining the same 5 pounds since August. <BR> It's been annoying.... Wed, 13 Feb 2013 13:45:52 EST Snatching Defeat from the Jaws of Victory I really feel this is what I have been doing. I've been so focused on the fact that I still have a few pounds left to "GOAL" that I've missed all my victory along the way. Sure, I have a few pounds (between 10-12) left to my ultimate GOAL but I've had so many GOALS that I've hit along the way. Today, I celebrate those. This week, I celebrate all my victories. <BR> <BR> I have lost 47 lbs in the last year. I weighed in at 191 on Feb 1. Admittedly, that was 9 months pregnant and what t... Mon, 21 Jan 2013 11:08:30 EST "Ladies Time" Warning: <BR> This may be graphic, contain semi-adult language, and for sure TMI. <BR> <BR> I had Mirena IUD between babies one and two. I take a long time for my cycle to regulate, so I never actually got "regular" before I got pregnant with baby two. I'm breastfeeding, so I'm not "regular" now and my cycles are all out of whack. <BR> <BR> But, seriously? This has been the worst. This one? The worst period I can EVER remember. My husband joked, "You are a walking stereotype!" I wa... Mon, 14 Jan 2013 09:55:24 EST Oi! Jan 3rd. 2nd work out. Kind of a wimpy workout, but I'm just going to plug away at things. 60 min a day, 5-6 days a week. Period. And getting back on track nutritionally. <BR> <BR> It's hard to feel "hungry" when I had a week of being full to the gills. <BR> Retraining my body. <BR> <BR> I can do this. <BR> I've also done 2 ST workouts. These flabby arms are going bye-bye! <BR> <BR> :) Thu, 3 Jan 2013 14:29:20 EST New Year! Well, my plans to be on track over Christmas-- fell short. This has been a really rough fall and winter. I only got one run in over the holidays. My plans to start 2013 off with a run, didn't happen... thanks to a migraine of epic proportions. I mean, I still have it. Obviously, since I'm up... its been reduced to "headache" but I'm still heading to the doctor this afternoon to find out what's up. I also had one one the 26th, which makes me nervous. 2 bad migraines in a week-- both eff... Wed, 2 Jan 2013 09:37:59 EST Pneumonia! JEBUS! <BR> Yes, It got worse. <BR> I now have pneumonia. <BR> Teach me to talk, eh? <BR> <BR> Actually, I feel pretty good. I don't feel sick. I don't feel awful. I just get really winded, still can't do any cardio, and cough up a storm periodically. The antibiotics for bronchitis kept it in check and kept it from getting terrible. I'm now on a super high powered 3 day course of antibiotics that should hopefully kick it. And then, hopefully... by next week, I will be back on my f... Tue, 18 Dec 2012 11:18:42 EST Silly really... I have worn contacts since I was 16. I hate the way I look in glasses. I think my eyes are really the only pretty thing about me and so I like to accentuate them. But, I've been in glasses for the last 18 months. My eyes became really sensitive to my contacts during the first trimester of my last pregnancy, meaning I switched to my formerly "bedside only" glasses. They are cheap and only okay looking. And I've said over and over again... I need to make an appointment to see the eye doct... Wed, 12 Dec 2012 09:36:58 EST I've decided! To view this bronchitis as natures way of forcing me to take a step back from exercise. I am itching to get back at it, but am in no condition to do cardio work right now... and we know I am a cardio fiend. But, I keep injuring my right leg. I keep injuring the same tendon over and over. I never give myself enough time to fully heal from the strain. So, I strain it over and over. I've done it 3 times now in the last few months. I know, from experience, that this tendon really needs abo... Tue, 11 Dec 2012 09:43:11 EST Bronchitis This annoying cough? The one that has been getting just a teeny bit worse each day? Yeah. It's bronchitis. So, I'm on antibiotics now. Just 12 hours on them so far, so no improvement yet. Hopefully very soon. I've got another script for steroids to help with my lungs, but I can't fill it until I check with A's pediatrician to make sure he is okay with me taking it while nursing. I probably won't take it unless there is no improvement. <BR> <BR> So, now my husband just needs to get s... Sun, 9 Dec 2012 10:31:10 EST ugh. just ugh. Ive been a bit absent here and in my WL efforts the last few weeks. I'm trying to hang in there... but things kind of seem to be on a bit of a spiral in the downward direction. <BR> <BR> I've been injured. I now have a chest cold. I've been dealing with all sorts of family drama. (I deleted a previous post detailing some of it, because while I needed it out there, I decided that perhaps it didn't need to STAY out there.) <BR> <BR> I'm still dealing with all sorts of family drama. I... Thu, 6 Dec 2012 10:28:10 EST A little overworked My body is in revolt. I tried too hard to quick to pick up and make up for a week of slacking exercise during J's hospital visit. It's screaming, "IM OVERWORKED!!! I can't do this! Don't try Don't make me!" So, I'm not. I'm taking it easy. I'm working out still, but I'm taking it easier for a few days. <BR> <BR> I hit this wall yesterday. I did my workout and it was harder than hard to do. And then, my blood sugar dropped. I wound up eating a lot yesterday. I was totally on track n... Thu, 29 Nov 2012 14:54:08 EST Longest week ever... OVER? Last week was the longest week in the history of my parental life. <BR> Brief recap: J falls ill during church on Sunday. Hospitalized on Monday. Hospital for Monday, Tuesday and most of Wednesday. Come home Wednesday night. <BR> Then I bake 2 pies, a cake, a casserole and make cranberry sauce on Wednesday night for Thanksgiving. <BR> <BR> The cousins are in town. Can't keep J away from them. Doctor says he's not contagious anymore, so we go to Thanksgiving with the family. J seems fin... Mon, 26 Nov 2012 09:38:09 EST Gratitude I have so much to be thankful for this year. <BR> We welcomed Amelia into our family. <BR> We bought our first home. <BR> We have grown and loved and learned so much this year. <BR> <BR> And one more thing is that Joshua will be home from the hospital to celebrate with us. He's coming home folks! He has to "eat a good breakfast" and then he will be discharged to come home and finish his recover with us! He is no longer contagious and can be around Amelia. He will even be able to go ove... Wed, 21 Nov 2012 08:31:03 EST Hospitalization Yup. Well, my little boy is hospitalized. He's been admitted to the PEDS dept and is now in isolation because he's got at the least, a nasty form of this years flu virus. It's likely there's more going on, but he threw up somewhere around 15 times. He's been running an extremely high fever that we can't seem to fully break. <BR> I've been at the hospital all day. I'm home now. The hubs and I traded-- I've got the baby now and the cozy bed. He gets to hover and sleep in a chair. If I... Mon, 19 Nov 2012 21:16:57 EST