MARY1964's SparkPeople Blog MARY1964's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Small victory I went out to lunch because one of my team is leaving today. It was sad and bittersweet but I planned my food and I ordered what I planned. I had one small piece of bread and left the rest there. This is a victory for me because usually I order a mushroom burger and fries at this place. I don't like fries much any more but I do like this place's fries. <BR> <BR> Anyway I had a grilled chicken salad tossed with wing sauce and no dressing and I enjoyed every single bite! Wed, 15 Oct 2014 17:58:31 EST Catching up with myself I'm slowing down so I can catch up with myself. It seems I've been experiencing one thing after another this year. This weekend I went shopping and bought healthy foods. I cooked on Sunday and I'm set for the week. Yesterday and today I skipped lunch mostly because by the time I realized what time it was it was really too late to eat. That makes me lowish on the calories but I'm going to get back on track. I'm tracking everything regardless. <BR> <BR> So we'll see how we do ... this time a... Tue, 14 Oct 2014 18:19:51 EST Ahh! So much food! I have to consume a lot of calories to get to my minimum and it reminds me of why my metabolism is so ridiculous. It seems like I'm constantly eating ... well because I am. :) I eat about every two hours when I'm eating right. I haven't actually gotten back to that yet but I'm working at it. <BR> <BR> Right now I'm baking some apples and blueberries in the microwave and I'm going to add a little crunch with some Natures Path cereal THEN I still have to eat a bag of popcorn before I leave.... Wed, 27 Aug 2014 15:22:36 EST Vacation over I did okay not going crazy with the food. Now this week I'm stepping it up. I skipped breakfast today which I know is a bad thing but I just didn't feel that great. I have a bit of a headache and it's causing me to feel a bit off. <BR> <BR> For lunch I had leftovers from dinner last night. I went to this Mediterranean place for dinner because I wanted a lentil salad. I thought that was the place I had seen one on the menu but it was not. So I ended up ordering falafel and chicken shwarma... Mon, 25 Aug 2014 14:28:46 EST Life ... What can I say? Life got in the way. Ever since I found out my company was being sold and I was going to be out of a job at the end of this year I have been working more hours than ever before. The company sold on 8/1 and I spent the last two weeks just getting all the reports etc out of the way and establishing new processes for me and my team to work with the transitional team. <BR> <BR> This week I'm on vacation. When I go back next week I'm committed to working 40 hour weeks - in at ... Tue, 19 Aug 2014 21:04:13 EST Friday! It has been a long week. With my company being sold and me being out of a job sometime later in the year (no date yet) things are pretty stressful but I'm doing my best to deal with them. I hate not knowing my own future, it's just so scary. I'm having dinner with two of my work friends tonight and I'm very much looking forward to that. I'm hoping to spend some time with my family this weekend if things aren't too crazy for everyone. <BR> <BR> I have a lot of work to do and a lot of discipli... Fri, 27 Jun 2014 12:38:20 EST Been missing in action for a while 1 - MRI - no major issues other than the arthritis so that's good. I'm taking more medication for pain and some additional muscle relaxers etc and getting PT. The PT guy is helping me to improve my posture, build up my abdominal and hip flexor muscles and overall change how I walk and stand. It is not easy but I'm doing it. I can't work out until he gives me the "okay" and he's not thrilled with my slow progress. I do see a difference. (feel really) <BR> <BR> 2 - Where have I been? Well ... Fri, 20 Jun 2014 18:06:45 EST MRI So I did it. I went and had an MRI on Friday night. It wasn't an open one like they said. It was larger though so it didn't feel quite as restrictive. I was in for half an hour and I was pretty much ok. I'm glad it's over. <BR> <BR> I will get the results on the 15th. I'm tired and sore today but it's nice so I am taking short walks Sat, 3 May 2014 18:10:30 EST Couldn't do it I have been re-scheduled for an open MRI for I guess Friday. <BR> <BR> I'm upset about it but it is what it is. I guess I felt like I couldn't breathe. <BR> <BR> Tue, 29 Apr 2014 20:29:49 EST MRI day Nervous as hell. I picked up the Valium last night and it was supposed to be two. One for an hour before and the second right before the procedure. The doctor only called one in. I need things to go exactly as planned or I'm going to freaking lose it. <BR> <BR> Okay time to go. Tue, 29 Apr 2014 11:06:18 EST Weekend Wow! This is kind of huge. <BR> <BR> On Saturday I got up bright and early and went to the Farmers Market. (Thanks for the suggestion again Snowmaiden) I walked around for a while and sat when my back started to hurt. I met a friend there and we shopped together. She was patient about my having to rest my back which made it nice. After I bought my produce I went to Target, the grocery store and the butcher. Then I went and put away all my stuff, took a shower and headed out for the night. ... Mon, 28 Apr 2014 10:47:20 EST Hmm four days off plan and four pounds gained Not exactly sure how that's possible to be honest. I really didn't follow the plan but I didn't go crazy and consume tons of calories either. <BR> <BR> Well stress does cause me to retain weight or it has historically anyway and this week has been rough. We'll see what next week brings after I've had an opportunity to process all of this stuff happening with my back. I have the MRI Tuesday afternoon. <BR> <BR> I'm in a funk today so I don't have much to say. Or I guess more aptly I have a ... Fri, 25 Apr 2014 13:22:46 EST Well four days off plan I'm not thrilled with myself. I'm pretty sure I've undone some of the good. I just kept giving myself permission with every bite. I have to say it wasn't worth it. I feel bloated and swollen and my stomach isn't feeling so hot this morning. I'm sure a lot of the stomach upset is the new medications I'm taking so I'm not going to stress too much about that. I'm going to give myself ten days to get accustomed to the medication then see where we are. <BR> <BR> Eating healthy however starts tod... Thu, 24 Apr 2014 11:51:09 EST Vacation over and it might be a good thing since even though I stayed okay on caloric intake my ratios were very off. Lots of fats. <BR> <BR> I guess we'll see how badly or how much damage I've done in the next week or so. <BR> <BR> My appointment with the pain management doctor was really good. There's a lot for me to process so I'll wait until I've slogged through it all before I blog about it. <BR> <BR> I'm on three more "all the time" meds which irritates me but I'm optimistic that there is a li... Wed, 23 Apr 2014 11:39:01 EST Easter Well I ate what I wanted but in moderation. I made and brought spinach artichoke dip and everyone loved it but I stayed away from it for the most part. I had dinner with the family and then later that night at home I snacked on fresh veggies. All in all I think it was a success although my ratios were screwy. <BR> <BR> My younger sister is a force to be reckoned with on any given day. I wish we were closer but we haven't been for a very long time. She keeps me at arms length and I have to r... Mon, 21 Apr 2014 13:57:47 EST Rough night Well I can say that my first three weeks were great. Yesterday was all planned things were going good and I had an emotional upset. Just like always I reverted to give myself permission to eat badly. I used to deny that I had an emotional eating issue but that ship has sailed. <BR> <BR> So here I am on the other side of it - sleepless night, lots of introspection, some self-justification and I'm back on track. I have to keep telling myself that I can backslide and it will be okay. One bad d... Sat, 19 Apr 2014 12:37:02 EST Week 3 weight check in Normally my weekly weigh in day is Monday. I'm not going to be here at the office (where the scale is) on Monday so I'm making today this week's weigh in day. As a matter of fact I've just this moment decided that starting this week Fridays will become my weigh in day. I think it's better this way anyway because if I'm going to carry extra water weight it's going to be from a weekend of not enough water and higher sodium content foods. Fridays will be a more realistic (and favorable let's fac... Fri, 18 Apr 2014 11:43:33 EST Avocados I love avocados but in order to eat clean I have to buy them whole and wait for them to ripen and I never quite know when the perfect time to cut into them is and they have such a short time when they are just perfect. This morning I had half an avocado that was just a little past the perfect stage with my eggs and sausage and it was good but it would have been better yesterday. <BR> <BR> Allergy season is upon us. I had to take a Zyrtec last night not for the hives but so I could breath. I ... Thu, 17 Apr 2014 11:25:48 EST Breakfast! This is the best batch of turkey breakfast sausage patties I've made yet. The problem is I didn't measure anything, I just kind of threw in a bunch of stuff. I bought fennel seed just for the sausage too and forgot to put it in. <BR> Next time I'm measuring and writing down everything I put in it. I just hope I can re-create these. <img src=""> <em>4</em> Wed, 16 Apr 2014 10:09:19 EST "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead" Have you heard about this documentary? I watched it last night (well most of it, I fell asleep during the last part) and I was so impressed. I'm going to try to re-watch what I missed tonight. Very inspiring. <BR> <BR> This very nice man from Australia goes on a sixty day doctor supervised juice fast. Actually his doctor on this adventure was Joel Fuhrman who I'd heard of before. I'm not sure I'm prepared to do a sixty day juice fast but I feel like maybe a ten day one when I hit my first pl... Tue, 15 Apr 2014 10:37:28 EST Weigh in - Week 2 Five pounds more for a total of eleven pounds since 3/31/14. I know this kind of weight loss won't continue but it sure is nice to have it now. I was actually hoping for a nice even number like twelve. <BR> <BR> I'm very pleased with myself today. Mon, 14 Apr 2014 10:14:07 EST Burned my beans I think my slow cooker is broken. It's okay though I just threw them out and will try again with my other slow cooker. I went to dinner at my moms house today. That was nice. She's a great cook. <BR> <BR> I really wanted ice cream but I pushed the craving back and drove home without stopping. I'm pretty proud of myself for that. <BR> <BR> Sun, 13 Apr 2014 23:07:59 EST Let the cooking commence! My creation black bean gumbo has begun! I cannot wait to smell those smells in my house. In a half hour I will throw in the meat and get on my way to errand running. Yum! Sun, 13 Apr 2014 13:09:31 EST Best friends I spent some quality time with my very best friend in the world last night. We sat and talked and enjoyed the beautiful evening. We caught up on each other's lives and just took time to re-new and re-group. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful person in my life. Everyone should have a friend who is there through it all supportive and encouraging but also there to throw up the stop sign if we get out of control. <BR> <BR> She is my person. We have known each other since we were fourteen yea... Sun, 13 Apr 2014 12:34:14 EST My journey ... not yours I think everyone here is on a journey but we all have to figure out what works best to keep us on the right path so we end up where we set out to go. We will, most of us, veer from the path for a little bit but if we truly want to continue the journey we will find a way out of the muck and the mess and find our own way back to the right path for us. This is not a diet for me - this is a lifestyle change. <BR> <BR> Again, all of us have a different path but I am here to say that I do not see... Sat, 12 Apr 2014 16:09:13 EST Dinner out Dinner out last night went well. I ordered exactly what I'd planned to order and even with trying a piece of pizza someone else had ordered I stayed within my ranges. I was a little low on protein as far as ratios yesterday but that's to be expected. <BR> Thu, 10 Apr 2014 09:40:49 EST Day Ten Day ten and I'm still feeling good about this. I'm tracking my nutrition and my fitness (what I've managed which isn't much) and I'm making strides toward a healthier life. <BR> <BR> I did skip breakfast today unintentionally. I realized after I'd gotten about halfway here that I'd left my food at home today. I have veggies here for snacks but I'll have to grab something out for lunch. I considered maybe just having some protein shakes today but I'd rather do this on whole foods at least unt... Wed, 9 Apr 2014 10:34:05 EST Seriously though In October 2006 I celebrated 100 pounds lost. I lost most of it on Sparkpeople. Probably about twenty of it was before I found this website. That was 7 1/2 years ago. Where has the time gone? <BR> <BR> I have gained that 100 pounds back of course and being that I'm quite a bit older now it's taking more of a toll on me this time around. I'm unhealthy. All of my adult life I have been overweight but I was always strong and hardy. I could still go places and do things etc. <BR> <BR> with my... Tue, 8 Apr 2014 20:03:37 EST I overslept today I remember hitting the alarm but instead of snooze I guess I turned it off. I woke up ten minutes before I was due at work! So I got her an hour late - not an auspicious beginning to the day. It's all good though I'll make it up. <BR> <BR> I went a bit off the reservation last night. I tracked it and it is embarrassingly bad. Fast food is not my friend. I just gave myself the excuse to do it and then the old "Well I've already ruined the day so I might as well ..." monster reared it's ugly ... Tue, 8 Apr 2014 10:45:04 EST First week results Six pound weight loss my first week. I'll take that. :) <BR> <BR> This weekend was an opportunity to de-stress and re-group and I did both. I did not however get the cooking completed that I wanted to. It's all good though, I'll just do it during the week. <BR> <BR> Produce and protein shopping is tonight. <BR> <BR> Mon, 7 Apr 2014 12:21:09 EST Edema Boy can I tell the difference already in the way I feel without the edema. My fingers look and feel different and my legs don't feel as heavy. I hurt my knee a little going up the stairs in my building. It's ridiculous that I've let my body get so out of condition that climbing stairs has become such a huge ordeal. It makes me heartily sick of myself. I'm trying really hard not to do the "if onlys" right now. I lost a lot of weight a few years ago and was really doing extremely well. I lost m... Fri, 4 Apr 2014 10:52:11 EST Meetings We had a five hour meeting today and we ordered out for lunch. I ordered a salad with greens, chicken, mandarin oranges, carrots, red bell peppers and a sesame ginger dressing and it was yum! It came with a wheat roll and a dessert. I gave my dessert to my friend. I'm very proud of myself! <BR> <BR> I am currently trying to catch up on my proteins because of the pitiful amount of chicken on that salad! :) I just mixed a scoop of chocolate whey protein powder with a packet of stevia and a c... Thu, 3 Apr 2014 18:40:44 EST Ugh Had to reset my tracker back to my original weight because I gained it all back. Sure as heck doesn't take long. I'm feeling frustrated but in all honesty I have no one to blame but myself. I am a stress eater and I let the events around me impact my eating habits. I don't over eat per se but I eat bad for me foods and stop cooking and start eating or ordering in. <BR> <BR> I have put myself back on plan and am very happy with how well that is going. The weight re-gain was an issue and I ne... Wed, 2 Apr 2014 13:31:05 EST Wednesday I'm craving a cup of coffee but I'm going to abstain today. Mostly I just want to let my stomach heal for a while. I tend toward a lot of stomach acid as a rule and with the stress of the last months added to the acidic and greasy foods I've been eating I'm struggling a bit with heartburn and some relux. I'm hoping if I can avoid coffee, tea, fruit juices etc as well as fried food and spicy foods and other trigger foods. So far so good. My system seems to be falling back into a good pattern f... Wed, 2 Apr 2014 11:00:04 EST Food choices I'm feeling pretty happy and empowered with my food choices. I had a lovely lunch today with lots of fresh raw veggies and another chicken salad sandwich. It wasn't all clean but it was healthy and fairly preservative free. The Arnold multi-grain sandwich thins are kind of questionable but they're a great source of grains and fiber. The first ingredient is whole wheat flour so that makes me feel a little better. They were on sale 2 for $6 so I grabbed them. <BR> <BR> If I'm going to eat cl... Tue, 1 Apr 2014 14:57:20 EST Small victories Today at lunch I ran to the butcher shop and the grocery store and picked up the rest of the items on my lists. I didn't get anything that wasn't on the list either which is good for me. <BR> <BR> I wasn't able to make the big veggie salad I wanted for lunch because I ran out of time but instead of using that as an excuse to eat badly I just re-arranged my nutrition plan for the day. Chicken salad made with Greek yogurt on a sandwich thin with popcorn and a bag of Steamfresh mixed veggies wi... Mon, 31 Mar 2014 17:37:53 EST Some thoughts Yesterday was a year since my father passed away. I've been busy so I don't think I've really allowed myself to sit down and mull that over. Today I'm feeling kind of down but not nearly as bad as I thought I'd be. I need to take some time for myself just to process it all I guess but I'm not sure when. I couldn't sleep last night so I'm pretty wiped out today. I miss him so much. <BR> <BR> It has been a tumultuous few weeks for me and I could have used some of his good old fashioned common... Mon, 31 Mar 2014 12:50:36 EST New beginnings Every ending is a new beginning. Someone said that. I have been lower than low lately and it has really de-railed me in every aspect of my life. I read recently that therapists advise not making any life changing decisions for a year after losing a close loved one. I lost my Dad on 3/30/13 and I'm still dealing with the pain of that loss. On top of it what I predicted has come to fruition and I'm struggling to deal with it as well. My father was my link to my family. My relationship wi... Wed, 5 Mar 2014 10:09:28 EST Well here we are ... again I went off the rails. This story is getting kind of old. I used to tell people that I was not an emotional eater. Here's the thing. I don't binge and purge when I'm feeling low. I don't sit on my couch and eat a quart of ice cream. I don't actively eat more food when I'm in a funk. <BR> <BR> What I do is get lackadaisical which might be worse because it's insidious. If I were binging or eating twelve tacos in a sitting or baking a pan of brownies and then sitting down in front of them with a... Wed, 12 Feb 2014 13:15:49 EST Eating right I stayed well within my ranges this weekend. Still not managing to consume more than 1100 calories a day so I need to step that up. Planning is key until it becomes a habit again. <BR> <BR> Today started out okay, mostly because I remembered to heat up a breakfast burrito before I left the house. I'm thinking I'm going to start doing some make ahead smoothies in the morning because I'm getting very sick of the plain yogurt and fresh fruit snacks. Today I literally had to force myself to ... Mon, 13 Jan 2014 12:22:09 EST Not a great food day I'm way under in everything. I'm just chalking it up to poor planning. Time to start planning my menus. I didn't eat breakfast today. Too much going on at work. I have to take the time to heat up a wrap. It only takes two minutes! Geez. Anyway tomorrow's another day. Time for sleep. <BR> Wed, 8 Jan 2014 22:04:43 EST I've had a good week so far I'm eating well and tracking. I overdid things a bit today due to bad planning but I'm not worried about it. I made so much food this weekend it's nuts! I was kind of snowed in so I cooked and baked whatever struck my fancy. It is nice not to be eating crap. <BR> <BR> I had to come home tonight and package and freeze all the extra food. Seriously I made enough food to feed an army. A huge pot roast with tons of veggies, Caramelized fennel and onion soup with chickpeas (pretty good and I boi... Tue, 7 Jan 2014 23:42:10 EST Went MIA for a while I'm back though. After Thanksgiving things kind of went south for a little while. I've had some emotional issues to deal with and some serious re-evaluation to be done. After a lot of self recrimination and soul searching I have decided that it's time to eliminate negative influences from my life. I tend to hold onto people much longer than I should as a rule and I need to learn to give over and give up. <BR> <BR> It feels wrong to walk away from these people because in some cases they have ... Mon, 30 Dec 2013 11:41:19 EST Joining a gym Well I made it to the parking lot outside the gym last night. I didn't park but I did slow down. I have to laugh at myself because I cannot believe how absolutely frightened I am to walk into this place! I'm just going to have to try again and again until I can get up the nerve and get it done. I'm such a baby! LOL More than likely at this point it will be in December now since I won't be back until then. <BR> <BR> Last night I realized that I'll be in New York in a week. I am so not ready. ... Wed, 20 Nov 2013 09:53:10 EST Well I didn't lose any weight last week I guess it's my own fault for eating higher over the weekend. The thing is though I didn't go over my highest allowable the entire week even this weekend. I'm trying not to let it get me down but it's hard when you work so hard. <BR> <BR> I keep putting off going to the gym to sign up. It's fear of the unknown and I know that but even in knowing I still can't get myself to push past it. I have some sweatpants I can wear and I'm sure I can find a casual t-shirt that isn't too tight. I have ... Tue, 19 Nov 2013 10:08:33 EST Wow there is a learning experience I was craving a BLT so I went to Sonic and ordered a BLT Toaster. 510 calories, 26g fat, 1000+ mg sodium. Next time I'll just ignore the craving and make my own when I get home! Sheesh! <BR> <BR> It didn't kill my day though because I just adjusted accordingly. This is a lifestyle not a diet so I have to be adaptable and learn from my experiences. Right now I'm eating steamed veggies olive oil and balsamic. <BR> <BR> I'm looking forward to having some down time this weekend. Sunday will ... Fri, 15 Nov 2013 16:14:28 EST Starkist chunk light tuna in a pouch I know I've said this before but I hate fish. I can't stand the taste or the texture. That having been said I bought some of these Starkist chunk light tuna pouches on sale at the grocery store and they've been staring me in the face for a few weeks. I had one today mixed with a tbsp of greek yogurt, a tsp of pepper and half a mashed avocado on a slice of ezekiel bread toasted (open faced). I devoured it! It was pretty good actually. Now all of it did not fit on the bread so I'm scooping... Thu, 14 Nov 2013 15:53:38 EST Ugh I'm so distractable today! One of my friends just emailed me a recipe and I completely lost my will to work for a minute. <BR> <BR> I have been making a list for a week. I am now up to six different things I want to cook this weekend. I have to slow my roll because I cannot eat all of this food! :) I have been to the grocery store three times since Sunday. I keep coming up with more but I .... have .... to .... stop. For heavens sake in twelve days I'm headed to New York for a week so I have to stop the madness! I ha... Thu, 14 Nov 2013 11:23:11 EST Thursday I am waking up tired and logey again and I don't like that feeling. I'm hoping it's just this cold or whatever it is I have and I'll be back on track soon. Saturday I'm sleeping in! <BR> <BR> I'm feeling pretty good overall, just need to get rid of this stuffy head. My fingers are thinner and it's easier to climb stairs so I know I've gotten rid of a lot of the water weight I was carrying. <BR> <BR> Anyway short post today I have a ton to do at work. Heading off to make an egg sandwich an... Thu, 14 Nov 2013 09:40:12 EST Weight loss I am very happy today. Not only did I re-lose the three pounds I had gained since 10/14 but I lost two more for a total of five pounds down last week. <BR> <BR> I took the day off yesterday. I had a fever, sore throat and a headache but I'm not surprised since a lot of people at the office have been sick in the last few weeks and if it has anything to do with sinus or upper respiratory I'll get it. (God I sound like an old woman) I pretty much slept all day yesterday and healed. Today I'm fe... Tue, 12 Nov 2013 13:34:58 EST