MACKANDME's SparkPeople Blog MACKANDME's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Been gone way too long. HI my name is Michelle. I have let myself go and due to some life circumstances just stopped caring. But I bumped into someone at Petco and we started chatting. Of course I complained about my weight. <BR> 2 weeks later she calls and leaves a voicemail that she needs a workout buddy and wondered if I was interested. <BR> Well, I am and want to set some goals in pounds by measurement of percentages. Like lose 5% of total body weight in 2 weeks. Then set another for the next 2 weeks and so on... Fri, 22 Jan 2016 11:45:15 EST Question Can someone help me with something? A few of my friends have mentioned Fitness Pal. And now that I have made exercise an integral part of my daily routine I want to take my nutrition more serious. Too much or too little food is bad. <BR> Can you guys help me with this? It is telling me my net calories, which I get. And it is telling me how many calories I need to burn each week. So are they saying that if I work out 6 times a week, I should eat 1648 calories a day with the intent of burning... Wed, 26 Jun 2013 20:15:18 EST Bi-Polars may follow this blog better than most. lol Now you see me, now you don’t. That is just how it goes with me. Lately I have had more down swings than ups. I Seclude myself. Ha ha. I seclude myself so much that when I get in a real conversation with someone in person, I can’t shut up. It’s like I am trying to tell them EVERYTHING I have had no one to tell it to for the few months. Lol <BR> I don’t even know why I am trying to write a blog. My mind is drawing a blank. Maybe I am just throwing out a rope to see if anyone will catch it. Tha... Mon, 15 Apr 2013 22:39:06 EST . Beauty is but skin deep, ugly lies the bone; Beauty dies and fades away, but ugly holds its own. Trying to fit the mold of perfection will not mask an ugly heart. Fighting effortlessly to rise above what you once were yet the only thing that changes is what you have, not who you are. Mon, 4 Mar 2013 16:28:51 EST Didn't proofread, just typed. If you read it, don't judge. I am so hungry. I have been losing weight the past 2 weeks and am liking that part of it. But I AM hungry. I have all my calories laid out every day and make sure I have a snack calculated for my binge prevention bed time snack. Sounds counter production, but for me the trick is knowing that no matter will happen. And if I plan for it then I am am prepared and have it measured out. But I digress. I am tired of hearing about Valentines Day. Ya I am alone, so what. But DANG I would lo... Mon, 11 Feb 2013 22:12:43 EST Angels among us. I have not written a blog in a long time. I had actually recently got back in to it on a regular basis. Life just went to the crapper. With being a single mom who paid for everything…braces, sylvan learning center so he could graduate. I pleaded with the court and kept him out of jail. Meantime every time I asked his dad for help I was told it was a waste of money. I guess his son’s future was a waste of money. Needless to say I got my finances in order and even had all my credit cards paid o... Mon, 28 Jan 2013 23:56:07 EST That time of year again... I am only thinking out loud so don't say I should be glad to have a job. I AM. This is my journal, therefore my thoughts. <BR> <BR> Been feeling down this week. <BR> <BR> I did get rid of that kid that was supposed to be helping me. And one of the bosses said I didn't do a good job managing him. I was not the kids boss and he had other duties given to him by his boss and I can't manage someone who has someone else telling them what to do. Don't put the blame on me man. But I am worried abou... Fri, 12 Oct 2012 11:36:42 EST Missing you My son moved away last Saturday. This is the first time in over 20 years he has not lived with me. And it has been he and I the entire time. I thought I was ready for it, but I guess I was wrong. I cried like a baby for 2 days. Then I had no choice but to suck it up for work. Since then I have tried to stay as busy as possible. Last night was the first time I actually sat on the couch and watched TV and that didn't last long either. It seems my emotions are ranging from, missing him, being di... Mon, 13 Aug 2012 19:31:10 EST Jim is gone Well, Jim is 20.5 years old and has moved to SLC, UT. We were in Texas the past 2 years for his continued education, but he graduated a couple of months ago and were waiting for our lease to end to move back to Utah. Me to St George (Southern) and him to Salt Lake City (Northern). I thought I was ready for the split but realized very quickly I am not. He left Saturday morning and I have been crying ever since. I stay in bed as long as possible. I hate when I wake up and the reality of his abs... Mon, 6 Aug 2012 13:15:41 EST Weight loss for furr balls. <img src=""> Sun, 8 Jul 2012 20:02:27 EST LC Vegetarians? Hey peeps. I have been gone for a while. Gonzo is more like it. Life got the better of me and my ambitions and motivations. <BR> As I went looking through the teams....I found (or rather didn't find) anything for vegetarians trying to also do low carb. <BR> So I am not looking for a vegetarian team. I already have 2 that I like for the vegetarian side of me. But is there a team where a vegetarian can speak of low carbs as a main topic? <BR> <BR> Can you all believe I have gained 30 pounds i... Mon, 2 Jul 2012 20:06:48 EST Hey Hey Hey! ~ Fat Albert~Ninja! Hooowhuat! So like I don't eat meat right? But I don't get my fruits and veggies either right? What DO I eat? Well... everything else! <BR> But seriously, I just got a Ninja for my birthday. The kitchen master! YEAH! I had been wanting one for a long time but would not spend that kinda dough on myself. Okay great! But now that I got it, what do I do with it? <BR> Now I know I have some mean juice head friends on please post some ideas for a good drink. I like drinking my protein shakes which ... Tue, 27 Mar 2012 20:01:51 EST Determination I have tried so many wacky diets and restrictions that lasted for months, I know if I just track track and track some more I will continue to make progress. I have 14 pounds I would like to lose. I think this could be the year. Last year I lost about 24 pounds. If I stay on the right path I could potentially have it gone by the end of March. Just in time for my 46th birthday. What a birthday gift that would be to myself. <BR> It is not a new year resolution. Just a continuance of an ongoing... Sun, 8 Jan 2012 18:11:15 EST Dust in the wind.... <img src="">All we are is dust in the wind........ <BR> I have been sick for about 2 weeks. Today is the first day in quite some time I at least tracked my calories again. I am starting slow and will reduce gradually. I will work ST back in once I am officially 100% well. We are day 3 in the New Year, but better late than never right? <BR> There have been a lot of sadness since before Thanksgiving. I had lost interest in pretty much everyt... Tue, 3 Jan 2012 22:38:34 EST Sugars vs substitutes I have a question...I have switched to a product called Stevia in the is a brand just like Truvia is a brand. But Stevia in the Raw I noticed has Dextrose in it. I finally read the ingredients due to a recent conversion. <BR> So is Stevia in the Raw really any better than regular table sugar? And which ever the answer may be...what is the explanation that lie behind the answer? I have tried just regular Stevia but hate the bitter taste. Where as the brand Stevia in the Raw tastes m... Fri, 4 Nov 2011 12:36:11 EST That darned scale! Won' it ever budge?!? Yes, but ever so slightly. I wish it wasn't taking so long to get to my goal weight. Last winter I was wearing size 15 stretch denim of course. it wasn't until late Spring I got myself into 11's, still stretch denim. Finally about 2 months ago? I was ready for my 9's. I noticed some of my 9's were getting really loose and baggy so out of curiosity I tried on my 7's. I don't have as many 7's as I do the larger sizes because I have spent more time bigger than smaller. Bu... Thu, 3 Nov 2011 14:28:08 EST Woo Hoo. Yippy Kei Yay <img src=""> <BR> <BR> One year down. The rest of my life to go. But I CAN do it. Man there are so many things in my life that would have turned out so differently had I not been drinking. So many opportunities I either passed up or screwed up. My relationship with my son even suffered. I have ALWAYS been a super mom. But he IS very happy that I quit both drinking and smoking. He says I am so much easier to be around. And so many black h... Tue, 1 Nov 2011 17:54:48 EST To my fellow night night time binge/eating people This entry is not about overcoming our urges to eat in bed, if that is your thing. It is mine. Last night I heard mt cats meowing and when I went upstairs I saw what I though was a piece of cat poop. So I turned on the light's a little annoyed and when I saw what it was I let out a scream followed by shrieks. You see, I am petrified of cockroaches and the bigger they are the more I freak. This one was the size of my toe! It was the first one I have seen since living here (15 months) and it w... Mon, 24 Oct 2011 15:11:08 EST The boogie man-What I can't see CAN hurt me! I have a random question for anyone who knows. I now live in a city where every little noise at night scares me. So far in the last 15 months there has been 3 shooting incidents. Only one of which we witnessed. A couple of nights ago it happened again. Each time it happens I lay in my bed frozen with fear. Flight or fight? Neither, I just turn in to a statue. So I eventually get out of bed to check the rest of the house and make sure Jim is fine and there is no one in the house. Then I procee... Thu, 6 Oct 2011 18:09:11 EST Bah humbug So I normally get on Spark each day and visit my teams and participate, but yesterday and today I was without central cooling again...three times in the last 2 months and the last time was only 10 days ago. So am kinda like, oh the heck with it. <BR> They came and "fixed" it today and a couple hours later I called and asked how long should it take to start cooling down? He says 2 or 3 hours......ummm that doesn't sound right, but okay. It has now been 3 and a half hours and the thermostat has... Wed, 28 Sep 2011 19:26:04 EST Protein shake scoops I saw a question last week about the scoops in the protein shakes and other things that have the lines halfway up the scoops I don't remember if I gave that person the answer so here it is again just in case.... <BR> What I do is place the scoop on a food scale and zero out the scale with the scoop on it. Then I add the powder till I get the weight the container indicates as the serving. <BR> <BR> For example, I am making my drink right now and it calls for 48 grams which turns out to be 2 "... Mon, 26 Sep 2011 18:21:49 EST Geez Louise! Taking dummy cap off now... So for the past few couple of months I have not gotten my regular emails or updates on my team posts. So I was getting perty darned toot-en irritated. So I checked my email preferences and clicked on the EMAIL tab. I did this over and over again and yup my interests were checked off alright. <BR> Today I noticed "If you are not receiving emails you can visit our ..... <BR> "email troubleshooting guide." <BR> Then I saw.... <BR> 2. When logged in to SparkPeople, click on the "Account/Email ... Mon, 26 Sep 2011 18:09:38 EST Wow nothing like confusing yourself and coworkers and management! Sheesh! I made one little "dumb" mistake and all heck broke lose. I was chasing my own tail and confusing everyone around me. Every time I sent them information I was sending them information for more than one client but all mixed together so they were like...wha? <BR> I need a do over for this day. Can't wait till Mon, 26 Sep 2011 16:21:43 EST Night time bingeing, do I control it or does it control me I would honestly have to say a little bit of both. But I lose weight and get toned for a while then I suddenly stop. No it is not plateau-ing. It is my horrible night time bingeing sabotaging my hard work! It is like I am working my A** off just to over indulge. But even that is enough to stall me. So for the last few months my eating disorder has been coming back more and more. But last night I made myself stay in bed and not go downstairs once I was in it! Anyone who has a night time bi... Sat, 24 Sep 2011 14:20:19 EST TGIF, I guess No really I am glad for the weekend. Not because my week sucked or anything. Just because in stead of sitting by the computer answering emails (work) or calling people (work)...I get to get away from the computer. Saturdays I don't like much because I work at the gym, but it is worth the benefits I get out of it. And it helps the owners to get out a little. <BR> So ya....glad it's Friday. Free the <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR>... Fri, 23 Sep 2011 14:36:09 EST Lost my groove Since my last BLC I kinda slacked on SP. But I was still awesome at going to the gym and quality work outs. But the the gym relocated and I used that as an excuse to slack off. I did not gain any weight back, but I did hit a major stall. Well I finally reminded myself that I am important too. It isn't just all about work or convenience. <BR> Back in groove again and no matter what making time. My trainer wanted to go to lunch on Monday around 11:30 but I told her if I did that I would make i... Thu, 15 Sep 2011 19:04:32 EST Push through the pain. So since my women's only gym moved (over a month ago). I have only gone a few times. Partly because there is no A/C and with the hot weather it was just miserable. But also because now that I help them out on Friday night and Saturdays they tend to interrupt my workouts with their stuff, while I am hurrying trying to get to my full time, pay the bills job. <BR> I joined La Fitness since it is closer and I get a little peace. Even though the other place is free because I help them out with ru... Tue, 6 Sep 2011 19:42:57 EST Under/Healthy/Over/Obese I know it's not much, but as of today I am in the HEALTHY range on the BMI scale. For the first time in just over a year. And I was sooo hoping to start this BLC round with less weight than I ended BLC16. <BR> I ended BLC16 at 158.8 and am starting this round at 154! <BR> <BR> (And I just squeaked in the healthy range at 24.9. But I'll take it!) Mon, 5 Sep 2011 20:11:40 EST Wow. I couldn't help myself. I have lost 2.5 pounds since the end of the BLC16! I have always regained and this time hoped to maintain the loss of the last round. But NEVER did I imagine I would lose in between rounds! <BR> <BR> I am soooooooo happy! Oh my gawsh! <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> And in the spirit of my Spark name.... <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <BR> *Photos found on ... Thu, 25 Aug 2011 22:40:11 EST Wow. I couldn't help myself. I have lost 2.5 pounds since the end of the BLC16! I have always regained and this time hoped to maintain the loss of the last round. But NEVER did I imagine I would lose in between rounds! <BR> <BR> I am soooooooo happy! Oh my gawsh! <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> And in the spirit of my Spark name.... <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <BR> *Photos found on ... Thu, 25 Aug 2011 22:40:06 EST The plane! The plane! I mean the pain! The pain! <BR> Trying to make it over a hump that not is associated with hump day. Up and down and up and down. I thought I was within calorie range yesterday but over with my veggie tray. Too much of a good thing is still too much. So today I counted every morsel and carrot! <BR> So today I am counting every morsel today. I did lose weight in the last 2 months but now I am yo yo-ing up 2 down 2. Up and down up and down. <BR> And to top it off, my knees have been hurting pret... Wed, 24 Aug 2011 21:35:34 EST Changing from the inside out In response to a thread on one of my teams I said: <BR> <BR> I feel pretty good right now. I hit the gym hard today and upped my weights as well. I took on a part time job at the gym, in addition to my regular full time job. Friday night one of the ladies came in and we were visiting with a few other members and she out of the blue says: "Oh Michelle, wow! Every time I see you tour arms are bigger every time". <BR> I don't know if I would go that far, but for her to say something made me fe... Mon, 22 Aug 2011 20:33:36 EST Making my spare time make me money. Got lost yesterday. Got lost today...twice. I am sensing a trend. I am trying to lie it here, but so far getting lost all the time is making it hard. <BR> I did get a second job today. So I will be working 2 jobs to try to get out of this hole I am in. I will be working Friday nights, Saturdays and some Sundays for n0ow and every Sunday after Summer. This was my idea as they are not currently open on Sundays. But since I offered they agreed it was a good idea. So I should be able to bring h... Wed, 10 Aug 2011 22:40:03 EST Not yesterday, not tomorrow, but today. That is what matters. Another night of binging. Yesterday was horrible. From the time I got up it seemed like everything that cam my way had to been done and right now. I felt pulled in too many directions at the same item. Perhaps it is my own fault for not saying wait a minute hold on! <BR> I am also tired of letting my depression and the action of others affect how the rest of my day goes. Who was that lady that used to say "Stop the madness!"? Susan Powter I think? Well I feel that way far too often. I want ... Tue, 9 Aug 2011 10:22:10 EST Appetite out of control The last few days it seems like I just eat and eat and eat. Even when my mind knows I am not experiencing true hunger I continue to find myself with yet another plate in front of me. And when I get on binges like this that last for days instead of choices are not exactly prime. I know what to eat just as much as I know what not to eat. Then why is it sometimes I throw out the window? I am so ticked off at myself. I say ticked off because what I really want to say is not appropriat... Mon, 8 Aug 2011 21:13:47 EST I choose not. Oh my gosh. No matter how hard I try I just can't have a happy house. I am fine when I am alone. I am fine when I am at the grocery store or the gym. It is when my son is home that it all goes to hell. Neither one of us has made friends since we have been here ( been a year now). But I at least try to get out to do things I am interested in, like the gym. <BR> He goes to school, which at first he loved, but now? Not so much. He liked his job, but now? Not so much. He hates it here. He is lon... Sat, 6 Aug 2011 19:11:55 EST High expectations and motivation= SUCCESS I had to redo this because I had my trainer redo the measurements the other lady did. It is best to have the same person do them each time for accuracy. <BR> This blog is mostly to help me keep better track of my progress so I don't have to keep going back through my older posts. <BR> <BR> So this is what I set for myself on July 11th for the remainder of July: <BR> Weight loss. I am going to shoot for 8 pounds, starting from today at 159. <BR> BF I can hopefully get down 1% (1% is huge for... Fri, 5 Aug 2011 20:19:05 EST I don't want to do anything when it's this hot Had a doctor appointment today so I did not go to the gym in the morning like usual. Instead I went after my appointment. But by then I was way too hot, had a headache and was tired. I did do my ST but after only minutes on the elliptical called it a day. Now I am in my oven of an apartment roasting like a rotisserie chicken. <BR> I will call the management tomorrow to have them come check my A/C unit, but I am not looking forward to another sleepless night. <BR> The appointment with the new... Wed, 3 Aug 2011 20:32:15 EST Paint yourself happy! For my status today I said I was trying to let the beautiful colors of my Spark page lift my spirits. And they do. And maybe the pics themselves give me that inner peace or hope. So I googled what were happy colors and this was what I found: <BR> <BR> This was a Yahoo answer: <BR> Yellow is traditionally the happiest color, b/c it is the color of the sun... <BR> Pink b/c it is the color of flowers <BR> Lavender promotes relaxation <BR> Blue is loyal and always there <BR> Green is sign of ne... Tue, 2 Aug 2011 17:34:25 EST Progress report for July self challenge So this is what I set for myself on July 11th for the remainder of July: <BR> Weight loss. I am going to shoot for 8 pounds, starting from today at 159. <BR> BF I can hopefully get down 1% (1% is huge for 3 weeks.) So we are talking 23% down 22%. <BR> Waist is 33.5 and hoping to get to 32.5. <BR> Hips are 39.25 and hoping to get to 38. <BR> It took 12 weeks to go down 1/5" on bicep so I am not going to worry about that for this challenge to myself. <BR> <BR> Weight only came down 2 poun... Sun, 31 Jul 2011 14:10:54 EST Itching to ck progress I made a challenge to myself July 11th for the remainder of this month. And I know I have made progress. Just how much I am not sure. For the past 2 days I have been itching to take measurements and such. Today I tried on all my different size jeans. And boy was I pleasantly surprised. The beginning of July I was wearing my size 15 jeans....not now! Wink wink. <BR> I will be having the lady at the gym take my measurements tomorrow at the gym and I have been tracking my own BF. <BR> I can no... Fri, 29 Jul 2011 22:40:25 EST Almost there Geesh. It seemed like such a long week. I am still stressed about the bill factor, but somehow Fridays always feel better whether you have money or not. I found a swim tankini on clearance so I won't have to keep swimming in shorts and t shirt. Jim has already stated that he plans on paying for us to get in tot he lake so we don't have to just sit around just because I am broke. Sweet huh? <BR> The heat has been giving me lots of headaches the past couple of days and the stress may be helpin... Thu, 28 Jul 2011 21:09:57 EST Sleep my life away Sometimes I wish I could. Depression gets the best of me sometimes. Financial woes. Finances cause a chain reaction. Can't pay the power, internet or water. The first 2 I need to do my job. Because of finances I am hoping the power company will take a partial payment for the second time this year. Because of a check that I forgot about and it just cleared I am already in the negative before I even get paid. Then I am not sure I will have enough for my medications. I have already lowered my b... Wed, 27 Jul 2011 14:19:26 EST Gloomy slow and muggy And it's only Tuesday lol. My day has been thrown off a little starting from the time I got up. I woke up way early. And not the kind you can roll over and go back to sleep from. I actually had time to go to the gym before I even started for work. Did over 60 minutes of varied cardio. And was able to get in 30 minutes of ab work and some stretching in as well. <BR> But now what? The middle of the day is when I usually work out and getting it done early has left a huge hole in the middle of my... Tue, 26 Jul 2011 16:36:34 EST Shoulda wore a Jim and I spent the day at the lake Saturday. Yes it was the one that was an hour away, but it was great. So much so that we went back out Sunday too. And even thought the GPS says it is an hour, it doesn't seem like a long drive at all. And unlike the other 2 lakes that are closer, this one is so big that there is room for everyone with space to spare. I do however have a sun burnt head. My face, chest and shoulders are too, but it's all good. My son got the worst of it. His poor skin neve... Mon, 25 Jul 2011 13:10:19 EST No computers, just water Son and I both have had enough of the house and not doing anything for the past year so last night I suggested going to this lake I was told about. We have other lakes closer but they are just lakes. A round circle with water. This lake is about an hour away but it also has horse back riding, hiking, trails, fishing and boating. And of course swimming. By the time we made it out there we ended up just swimming for a few hours, but are going back tomorrow and getting in some trails before and ... Sat, 23 Jul 2011 22:45:27 EST Happy Friday Was feeling really apprehensive yesterday waiting for some lab results. I don't know why I let myself get all worked up over things I have no control over. I know worrying will not change the outcome of things. But none the less my results are in and I am fine. And I am relieved. Now I can enter the weekend with a sense of ease and well being. Hoping everyone a wonderful weekend. Fri, 22 Jul 2011 12:02:14 EST Really dumb but serious fitness question! Need answer. I like to take measurements from time to time. Today I calculated my Lean Body Mass. <BR> <BR> I am not talking about BMI or BF...but LBM. <BR> <BR> All I can find on the internet are charts for BMI or BF. <BR> <BR> Grrr so frustrating. I am a numbers girl! <BR> <BR> Okay, here comes the dumb part... <BR> I was 98.2 lb but went up to 104.8 lb. So is this good or do I need to make some adjustments somewhere? <BR> Mon, 18 Jul 2011 19:34:47 EST So far so good... Not a bad start for the week. Was able to go to the gym this morning. Called the vet and found out Smokie does not have a urinary tract issue, which means it is a behavioral issue. Basically he does not like sharing Jim with any other cat. Jim is his human dang it! He only pees on Jim's bed. <img src=""> <BR> So we have to keep him out whenever Jim is not in his room. But the vet did give me some medication that should help him with his at... Mon, 18 Jul 2011 17:50:33 EST Never enough, but always too much. I wrote last night. And I thought, this would be a good blog for Spark. But I wrote and wrote and poured my heart and all my feelings into this notebook. There are six pages of me crying a river of how specific individuals feel certain ways about me. <BR> I addressed the individuals separately in order for me to try to get all my feelings out on these pages in a fashion that makes sense. <BR> Which brings me to the root of my feelings. <BR> Everyone seems to have the same issues with me, an... Sun, 17 Jul 2011 21:33:15 EST