MACILINN's SparkPeople Blog MACILINN's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Opps, my life got in the way! I am writing this blog to get my team 5 extra LTGL pts. I just signed up to be a determined daisy again hoping my drop of excitement didn't hinder my chances. When I started the challenge I was so gung ho! I had lost over 15 pds since Jan 1st and was on the way down w/the numbers. I was on fire... Then..... <BR> <BR> My 2nd daughter went back to work and left me with the caretaking of my youngest gdaughter 3 mos old. My youngest gson started walking and my nighttime babysitting got more ... Fri, 30 May 2014 03:13:39 EST "5% challenge getting ready to start!" join now! Hi sparklers, wow it's been an exciting yr. I started sparking again Jan 1st, at 171.8 pds. I had got up to 175 before I had the courage to step on the scale again. I avoided it like the plague. <BR> <BR> Today 88 days later I am 156.4. I've lost 15.4 so far this yr. It feels great! I am not afraid of the scale anymore. It's actually my friend. It keeps me on track and tells me when I might need to re-think my choices. <BR> <BR> 88 is a special number for me, it's not a coinsidence t... Sun, 30 Mar 2014 04:07:20 EST Join "100 days of weight loss" discussion with Maci! I have been doing a 100 day challenge since Jan 1st, and have lost 14.4 pds since then! I am on day 57 and have been on track everyday since Jan 1st. I feel really lucky, grateful and supported by all my wonderful sparking friends. <BR> <BR> Last wk I started teaching the challenge to my fav sparkfriends and they love it too! New ideas to ponder, new things to learn, things to remember too! Today I joined a new team and asked the leader if I could teach it to the sparklers on this team, ... Tue, 25 Feb 2014 23:30:32 EST Wow! Time to write another blog already! Day 50 and I am going strong, have lost over 13 pds this yr so far, feeling so successful, grateful and blessed. <BR> <BR> Today I won my league match, it was tough but doable, kind of like my spark path, tough but doable. I always say if it were easy than I wouldn't be here everyday doing it! This is a battle to be my best everyday and today I am on top of it all. I thank god everyday for the ability to keep on track, keep motivated, keep sparking along. Despite all the interuptions life ... Mon, 17 Feb 2014 16:49:36 EST "Just jumped over the service line!" This is very exciting to me, if you ck out my wt tracker it's a tennis court w/my star angel leading me to victory. Well I just hit a milestone, There are 5 lines on a tennis court, the backlines, service lines and the net line. I just jumped over my 2nd one! This offically makes me a net player, the net player makes most the scores! <BR> <BR> The backline player (where I started) just keeps the ball in, that is what I have been doing since Jan 1st, just doing what I know works, keeping ... Wed, 5 Feb 2014 21:32:41 EST Jan. 2014, It's gonna be a great yr! 9.6 pds gone so far! woohoo! Wow what a great start! I have made a few goals this month and have kept them all! I am feeling good. I came to the realization that it was my behaviors not just my food that has got me into trouble and created my current wt, so 2014 I am dedicated to changing behaviors one day at a time. Here is what I have been doing so far. <BR> <BR> I call these my dailys! (my no matter whats) <BR> 1. breckfast (to fuel my body) <BR> 2. vitamins (I take kids gummy ones, I love the taste and taking the... Thu, 30 Jan 2014 05:31:54 EST How do you define yourself? hummm. I had a dream/euphony the other day I want to share. The other day I had a dream, in my dream this mean girl walked up to me and asked me why do you belong here?, and looked at me as if I didn't belong. (I had a walmart sweatshirt & jeans on) and she was looking down on me because of it. <BR> <BR> My response: I belong Anywhere because I am kind person, honest, caring, good friend, dedicated wife and mom, & awesome gma and neighbor. I am wearing my walmart sweatshirt because I like it... Sun, 12 Jan 2014 15:50:27 EST *Remember, We are all doing the best we can! <BR> Have sweet dreams of peaceful places, joyful thoughts as your mind frolics through the pages of your memories. Think positive thoughts about special places and even more special people. Keep your eyes on the prize and remember that EVERYONE is doing the best they can, with who they are, what they know, and the tools and skills they have. Be gentle and kind with your words as you never know what tragedies, sadness, or issues those people you encounter may be facing - the pain, the triump... Wed, 5 Jun 2013 23:46:18 EST Sending you all Blessings today! Sending you all the blessings and sweet dreams, angel kisses, sunshine to warm you, raindrops to cleanse you and wash away the pain, and hugs and kindness from those you care about, gentleness and acceptance from those you don't even know YET, and a small reminder that what YOU do and say moves out from you in waves and touches many others besides the ones you actually SEE. Remember to make your words sweet in case you have to eat them later. Good night and God Bless you all. <BR> <BR> I c... Tue, 14 May 2013 22:16:30 EST "Time to put on my big girl panties" Again! Ok, damn I just blew it again! grrrr. You know what? it's been the first midnight binge in months. So I had one rough hr, I have had so many wonderful days, that this one tough hr is just a minute in time. I can't remember the last time I blew my dailys. And I even did do 4 out of 5! If you were crying the blues and telling me you had a blow it hr I would say "girl, put on your big girl panties and keep going!" You are doing great! You have been on track, loving life, doing great in so ma... Wed, 8 May 2013 15:58:54 EST Learning a new game!!! I am cheating on this blog: I am rewriting a blog I just read using tennis instead of baseball because I want it forever to be in my blogs. I loved it! <BR> <BR> Have you ever played tennisl? When you were learning to play did you hit the ball every time? Did you always hit the ball straight to the person you were hitting it to? Did you always hit the ball in when you were serving ? I didn't think so. It takes time and lots of practice to get good and even then you will not , hit the ball g... Sat, 4 May 2013 09:57:45 EST "My amazing feat yesterday!" <img src=""> <BR> <BR> This was the most amazing accomplishment I have achieved while sparking. This is a pic of our championship day. We are the division champs for ladies tennis in No Cty San Diego. It is amazing, Just 6 yrs ago I was a chubby couch potato. <BR> <BR> Yesterday i did something amazing that I had to share- My friend Annie rides her bike 14.4 miles everyday, she has done this over a month, well, yesterday I joined her... Mon, 29 Apr 2013 07:43:54 EST Chapter 5 "winning while losing" Stay in the game! Chapter 5 "winning while losing" Stay in the game! <BR> Tuesday, September 11, 2012 <BR> Hi sparklers, I wrote this series in June/July and never finished it, got injured and put on my back for the whole summer, I am recently back and thought now is a good time to finish what I started. Here goes! <BR> <BR> Chap 5- Stay in the game! "You have to play to win" *The hardest won victory is over self. <BR> <BR> Maintance Plan: You will have bumps in the road, good and bad (promotions, new rela... Wed, 12 Sep 2012 01:55:24 EST Christmas Time Challenge! Lose 12 by 12/12/12!!! I am so excited! I just posted my first challenge as a team leader! It is something we all can do! It's fun, doable, and we have 'plenty' of time to all be successful on it It is called the "christmas trim challenge- lose 12 by 12/12/12"Ck it out, sign up! We can all achieve this challenge together! HOpe to see you all say "count me in for christmas" today! <BR> <BR> Please post where you are! and how much you have to lose to make our christmas goal! I will post it on the challenges area o... Mon, 2 Jul 2012 22:18:48 EST Chap 4- Appreciate the small victories! Appreciating every small step y0u take in the right direction and all the "lil things" life has to offer are two of the smartest things you can do <BR> <BR> Shift your attn. from Neg to Positive, by celebrating your victories! Appreciate the small pleasures in life. The little things have the power to change your life and make you the happiest! the trick is to acknowledge and celebrate your small victories by, slowing down enough to enjoy life's simple pleasures! <BR> <BR> *Document and ... Sun, 1 Jul 2012 19:25:22 EST Chap 3- Part 2- Turning pain into power! You can love food and know it's always going to be apart of your life. We have to eat to live and if we never allow ourselves to have something that tastes good, we're going to feel deprived and prob end up binging and gaining again! Learn to embrace food! enjoy it. Keep it in single size portions! Moderation is the key! <BR> <BR> When you realize you are off track, or on the way off, GET BACK ON! Don't let one misstep lead to another. If you "blow it" pick yourself up and start where y... Tue, 26 Jun 2012 18:01:53 EST Chapter 3- "winning while losing" Turn Pain into Power! The only thing we really have power over is our thoughts! <BR> <BR> Emotional Pain is as much apart of life as pleasure and happiness. As long as you live you will have to deal w/it! <BR> <BR> Think of neg emotions as growing pains. There is an amazing amt of freedom and power knowing you can work through and overcome pain instead of running away from it of numbing out w/food. <BR> <BR> Step 3 teaches you how to turn your pain into power by healing the heartaches and resolving the issu... Tue, 26 Jun 2012 16:50:42 EST Chapter 2- Make a game plan! Step 1- Celebrate your success! <BR> Step 2- Make a game plan! <BR> <BR> Run off heart power- Commitment to a way of life. Nothing short of success can stop you! <BR> <BR> Defination of wishful thinking: maintaining wt loss w/o a plan. Unless you make a plan for success and stick to it, the only thing that will stay slim is your chance of success! 90% ! BE willing to do whatever it takes and learn whatever you need to learn too keep the weight off. Your mindset will have the biggest ... Mon, 18 Jun 2012 02:23:57 EST Chapter 1- "winning while losing" part 2 The first part of this chapter was about Celebrating your succcess's! Working from the inside out! Setting boundries, appreciating your achievements so far & <BR> your support team, dealing w/neg emotions, the reasons to journal and speak your truth, finding your voice , Stopping Stress! Here is where I left off. Remember Stress =wt gain! <BR> <BR> Action plan for stress free eating: "Do's" (most we know already) <BR> *Sit down in a relaxed atmosphere <BR> *eat at a comfortable pace ... Sun, 17 Jun 2012 08:17:07 EST Chapter 1- "winning while losing" part 1 Last night I started reading and making notes from a book I read long ago by a girl named Stacy she was on Oprah alot, she lost over 240 pds. It's called "winning after losing" Last night I did chapter 1. My goal is to do at least a chapter a wk. It has 7 steps. to keeping a winning wt loss . Last nights step was Step 1- Celebrate your success! Even though I havent lost it all yet, I want to change my mindframe to be of one who is a person will can keep motivated to keep going towards su... Wed, 13 Jun 2012 11:17:31 EST "114 days - Florida bound" Hi sparksistas Hubs and I just booked a cruise leaving oct 7th to the Panama canal. Leaving out of florida and ending in 0ur area San Diego. It's called a repositioning cruise, they are moving the ships to diff ports. We will be stopping in Colombia, Coasta Rica, Porta Vallarta, and Cabo San Lucas. The whole trip is 15 days. Our friends asked us to join them and their family. My gfriend just lost 50 pds and is feeling like a movie star, we are the same wt now. And I am 3 inches shorter!... Mon, 11 Jun 2012 05:59:27 EST "Winning the sparks battle is like tennis" Hi all, I am a league playing tennis player. I love tennis, I love it because it is something that I can get better at everyday. I can challenge myself, face my fears, try new things, use my strengths, statagise, work on, and be social with. <BR> Sparks, is Like tennis when I am focused on my game I am preety darn good. I do my dailys, I post, I take my vits, drink extra water, workout etc. Lose wt preety darn fast. <BR> Like tennis when I vacation, (take time off) my timing gets off, ... Fri, 1 Jun 2012 16:38:46 EST "Damn, was on a roll" well I decided to just be plain naughty this month. Ouch! I finally braved the scale and opps up 5 again. grrrr. I am hoping all that kettlecorn salt is just gonna wash away when I start drinking my water again. April I am back and committed to my goal I set the beginning of this yr. "to lose wt every month" so far I am 2 out of 3. About a B! Maybe a B-. The worse part is that March was my bday, 25th anniv month and we had company for most the month from out of state, so lots of pics and... Sat, 31 Mar 2012 07:26:00 EST "Almost at the net again" If you look at my lil tennis angel who graces my posts you will notice she is workin her way to the net again. It was not long ago that she was almost all the way across the court. I had to scoop her up and put her back on the baseline and start over in Nov. That was sad. but watching her move again towards the goal has been exillerating! I can't wait till she jumps the net. That will mean I am 1/2 way to goal. My goal since nov is to lose wt each month, and move her to the goal line. So... Mon, 5 Mar 2012 23:17:52 EST "Making the most out of March" I am changing! For the better, and loving it. It has been a slow and sure path for me since Nov. I made a commitment to lose wt each and every month this yr. so far so good! Tonight I have added a nightly commitment for March, of my 200+ I used to do. It is 4 sets of 25 bun and tum crunches and my "+" is twisting on a twisting board for 5 min. The reason I added this 200+ is that I am shaped like an apple. Meaning my hip/ waist measurement isn't that much different. The good thing abou... Thu, 1 Mar 2012 02:27:28 EST "I am doing Lent for the first time" A sparksister asked me to join her in lent. I said "sure" ! what I knew about lent was that you gave up something you really like until Easter. I thought it was to show a commitment to god. Well, as I told others I was doing this, I started hearing about ash weds, fat Tues, Marti Graw, etc. I thought those were just all party days but hummm I found out they were all related. So I decided to create my own version of what Lent meant to me, here it is! <BR> *Fat Tues meant last chance to ... Fri, 24 Feb 2012 00:07:14 EST "My first valentines w/my hubs, 25 yrs ago" My hubs Jim and I were work friends and our first date was right before christmas. We were the best of friends and occasionally flirted over the cook line back and forth. I was a waitress, he was a cook. We worked the graveyard shift, We had both been just recently divorced and both had 2 small children. After work sometimes he would ask if I wanted to bring my girls and come over to his home and he would cook us bkfst. Sometimes we would take beach walks. He was my fav person. <BR> In ... Tue, 14 Feb 2012 09:41:38 EST "Valentines Day is on the way!" What's your plan? Is it to eat sweets? take a beautiful walk? watch the sunrise/sunset? Eat at your fav restaurant? Eat your meals w/fresh flowers at the table? Watch a chick flick? etc... <BR> Make a plan to treat yourself like the sweetheart you are! or what you wish you deserved! You are amazing, and you deserve the best, esp from yourself. If there is noone in your life who will do it right than do it right yourself. If you have someone in your life who lives to treat you like the q... Sat, 11 Feb 2012 22:42:14 EST "That funky feeling" Grrrr. I just sent a long drawn out neg msg to one of my fav sparksisters! (yes you Kelly) It's amazing how all I have been working on w/attitude has vanished. I wish I could always turn off the neg feelings button. sometimes I just can't! What this means to me is that maybe it's time for a change, even a little one. sometimes it's just a change in attitude, my hubs says it 's a change in appreciation. That is hard to take when he is on my list of neg feelings! teehee. Luckily most times he'... Sat, 4 Feb 2012 05:36:51 EST "I'm on top of the world these days" Hi all! I am feeling on top of the world right now. I have been focusing on looking at the bright side of all things lately and it feels great. I feel really athletic right now. I feel really "in love" w/ my cute hubs, my gkids, my DD's etc. When anyone starts to throw anything negative at me (their neg feelings around them) if I don't want to join their conversation I am just changing my focus to something else. I am not taking it in. Not even thinking bad about having to deflect the neg eit... Fri, 27 Jan 2012 21:06:31 EST "I'm not slipping in the slime" This morning I played tennis w/my tennis partner and won more than lost, had in and out burger with 3 tennis friends, and I just got back from a 1 & 1/2 hr massage, when I walked in the door, my gkids were here, and my DD was cleaning. Within 30 min hubs walked in the door from work. al l this happened before 3pm. How lucky am I! What's funny is that with all those blessings around us, sometimes we can only see the slime below us. It's all about seeing the good in life, looking for it, an... Wed, 25 Jan 2012 18:08:11 EST "Vision for 2012" My DD and I took a class called "Make a vision board for 2012" It was really fun. We basically took magazines and cut out the sayings, we wanted to project into 2012. Than glued them on a pc of hard board. I made 2 small ones. My first one I cut into the shape of a heart and added 2 sm. hearts at the bottom for my hubs and my personal dreams/actions this yr. <BR> <BR> Here are some of the things I put on mine! (personal one, big heart) <BR> *Fit and trim *A rew easy changes, *sensibly... Sat, 21 Jan 2012 01:45:29 EST "Count your blessings today" Today some really awsome things happened! <BR> 1. Hubs replaced my partner at practice today and we played great together. fun too! He even cleaned our courts for the team! <BR> 2. When I showed up one of my team players said to me "Maci you and Jim are the nicest couple of people I have ever met" You both are so sweet! <BR> 3. We did a few fun team building exercises today that made us all laugh! <BR> 4. Had a fun lunch w/friends and hubs. In and out burgers rock! tom only! <BR> 5. 1... Thu, 12 Jan 2012 01:45:25 EST "First wk of 2012- mostly doing awsome!!!" I always try to do at least one blog a wk. This is a good place to start. I re-committed my dailys for 2012, here they are: <BR> 1. vitamins and water <BR> 2. Jems- (Journal, Exercise, Meals, Success's) <BR> 3. Sparks- Log in foods, ck in w/teams <BR> 4. Exercise- 6X a wk <BR> 5. Only Fruits and vegis after 8pm. <BR> <BR> Here is my wk of success! <BR> 1. yes, Vits and W- everyday. Ran out of vits ,got some more to be 100% <BR> 2. Jems- Yes logged them to a friend everyday. 100% <BR> 3. ... Sat, 7 Jan 2012 13:35:28 EST "Italy for the Holidays" What a great time to travel! Between Thanksgiving and Christmas, the streets are all lit up with christmas lights and there is just enough chill in the air to warm a light jacket and scarf. No crowds anywhere, and there are deals everywhere to be had. <BR> <BR> We started our trip in Venice, My cousin lives there, I posted a pic of her home. we started out trip with a trip on the vapporato (waterbus) down the grand canal and stopped at all the stops and saw the city first hand. It was won... Mon, 2 Jan 2012 02:15:09 EST "My Nov Challenge results!" <BR> 1 pt for each thing done each day: <BR> <BR> 1- *Take my vitamins! . <BR> 2- *daily accountability (jems) logged in- journal, exercise, meals, success's! <BR> 3- *Spark everyday! ( <BR> 4- *to do at least 30 min of exercise 6X a week <BR> 5- *Only F&V and popcorn after 8pm. <BR> <BR> My day 1 = Nov 1st! <BR> <BR> 1st wk. = 30.5 pts. out of 35! not bad. <BR> 2nd wk = 33 pts this wk! woohoo! <BR> 3rd wk = perfect score 35 this wk. <BR> 4th wk = Mon gone to venice italy! This challeng... Mon, 21 Nov 2011 02:00:15 EST "the greatest thing happened tonight" I was doing my sparks thinking.. hummm I haven't done any exercise today and I really don't want to! I have been 100% on my goals this Nov. and one of them is that I will exercise 30 min a day 6X a week. I even thought that maybe at our familys thanksgiving feast tomm I will just excuse myself and go walk around the lake. Than thought... Thats prob not gonna happen. so I walked into my gson's room and said "Blake, gma needs your help, I need to walk at least 30 min if you go with me we can... Sat, 19 Nov 2011 21:38:10 EST "Worried a bit! " I am leaving Monday 4am to get on a plane to Venice Italy, all those who are on sparkteams w/me or have read my blogs know this! I have one lil problem... I am abit scared about the exercise part of my sparkin. I know I will be on the go with walking, and I will hopefully will be fine w/food choices, but I won't be swinging my racquet. and I believe that is one of the reasons i lose wt so rapidly when I am staying w/i cals. Also i have a tendency to always eat healthier when i know I am g... Fri, 18 Nov 2011 00:41:30 EST Yeah! In the 150's! Woohoo! Weigh in went well. Re-Started sparks Oct 29th 167 pds. / Last wk 164.4. This week 159.4. Oh life is good! My tennis clothes are already feeling loser, my face is looking thinner and I have a new spring in my step. Plus I am not dreading the scale. What could be better than that. <BR> <BR> Last night Hubs and I went to a concert and saw Tim McGraw and I felt preety again, I may not be where I want to be yet, but as they say "The best is yet to come" If I stay doing my daily g... Mon, 14 Nov 2011 11:13:07 EST I can't wait to weigh in! tomm morn is w/i day, I feel like I ahve done so good this month so far, on track all month, I just pray it shows up on the scales. i may just do the measurements first just incase. LIfe is feeling so good. <BR> Tonight we are going to a concert, Tim McGraw is doing a concert on Base for the military, we love the base free concerts! I have on my boots and leggins and a new cute long shirt, I love this look, my DD's call it my Pat Benetar look! I think it's not only cute but a tad sexy ... Sun, 13 Nov 2011 20:27:30 EST OMG within cals yesterday! woohoo I thought for sure I was over than this morn I popped in my cals and yiola! 1350. I almost fell off the chair. Yes, the candy got me again, but only 4 mini pcs and I logged them and was still a success, plus I made good choices yesterday too! <BR> The candy has really got ahold of me this yr , and it isn't even the usual stuff, my gkids gummys. I bought tons of them for halloween thinking, hey if we don't use them than the gkids can have them later. Captn' America gummys. Who thought I wou... Thu, 3 Nov 2011 07:45:12 EST It used to taste great! what happened? Hi gang, well I just gagged down a salad. It's hard to believe that was my fav meal just a few months ago. It's hard to get back on track again. The only thing that excites my taste buds either melts or has sugar as the main ingredient. This kind of eating put my 20+ pds back on, so I am just going to have to adjust or learn to live, chubby! Not an option. For today I am better than I was yesterday, that has been my goal in the last week, to be better than the day before. Goal accomplished. ... Tue, 1 Nov 2011 21:24:07 EST "It's been awhile" I am sitting here at 4am blogging, because I really want to come back with vengence. I have been so flaky where my sparking has been concerned. Last yr at this time I was much thinner, because I was sparkin daily. My focus was on my cals, exercise and doing my daily goals. <BR> <BR> Today I am going to make a plan: I am going to start my day walking the beach to bkfst w/hubs. Than I am going to post my foods in my log and do my best to stay under 1800 cals. Usually I shoot for less, but ... Sun, 30 Oct 2011 07:11:43 EST " Wedding well wishes" It is almost 1am. I am sitting here with hair dye , taking away the gray as I type. This wkend is my youngest DD's wedding. It is gonna be a great time, but... I have so much out of town guests and trying to juggle entertaining them and getting ready for the wedding, I am afraid my sparking has been put onthe backseat for the last wk. As i write at my home is 3 of my gkids, My DD, My Stepdaughter, My stpson and his wife, my aunt and Uncle are staying around the corner ina hotel and the res... Sat, 24 Sep 2011 04:02:43 EST "New opportunity? or is it?" Wow, my hubs just got the job of a lifetime. It is made for him. One of his best friends worked hard to make it happen and we have decided to "go for it" oh I pray this is good for us. Here is the job <BR> <BR> My hubs is going to be service mgr for a resort community. Which means he drives around in a golf cart and makes sure the landscapers, cleaning personal, pool people, etc are all working hard. All the service people in this community wear ties and they even have pool personal who... Sat, 10 Sep 2011 16:03:55 EST "Say Yes today!" Hi sparklers out there , I was just reading a blog from a girl named Laura, she was telling us about enjoying foods for wtloss. Here is my take on that, <BR> <BR> Years ago, I contacted a "wtloss sponsor" she had lots tons of wt and was helping others do so to. She took me on as a student and I did loose wt, alot! <BR> <BR> Here were her rules for me <BR> 1. Eat your fav food everyday, out of the home, at the time mine was Thrifty choc chip ice crm, she said "get one everyday, a single... Sat, 10 Sep 2011 10:26:06 EST "First blow it day" Dont' know why sometimes I just choose to be naughty. I was done w/my logging, foods etc. and than watching TV last night late I just decided to forget my goal of not eating after 8pm except F & Vs. I had already gone just over cals, but was not in the danger zone yet. but my midnight munch put me over the top. I have to confess my first "blow it day" since I started sparks. A "blow it" to me is anything over 2000 cals. <BR> Luckily because of my new habits acquired I was able to get up ... Thu, 8 Sep 2011 09:46:30 EST PMP challenge! Spark log. My PMP progess log! <BR> <BR> 1. *"Starting Line", How many in one minute <BR> ?Crunches? 36 <BR> ?Situps?18 <BR> ?Pushups?14 <BR> ?long plank position? 50 secs <BR> ?pullups?0 <BR> ?squats?28 <BR> <BR> 2. *"What equipment will be you be using in this challenge?" <BR> My own body weight & Free weights and dumbbells at home . <BR> <BR> 3. *"What dumbbells weight level are you starting at?" 3pds each. <BR> <BR> 4. "Why do you feel the burning desire to grow stronger, to change shape,... Tue, 6 Sep 2011 16:04:24 EST "Out of the mouth of babes" Yesterday I was driving home and rehearsing all the nasty things I want to say to my SIL. I got home and realized that I am still crap talking, even thought I am not doing it out loud anymore. (sharing my thoughts w/others) I got home and decided to talk to my youngest DD. she is the least emotional and most educated of all of us. I asked her "Em how do you think I can make the crap leave me for good?" She said "Mom, have you ever had this prob before?" I told her yes, when her oldest sist... Wed, 31 Aug 2011 16:45:39 EST "going with the flow" It' is almost 11pm and I can't sleep. It happens alot, I used to love my sleepless nights when my fam was all tucked in, I'd clean the house, read. watch movies and had all my "me" time then. Now I have to admit I still do! teehee. My guilty pleasure. <BR> <BR> My biggest prob these days is flowin w/the flow of life, I just watched Brothers and Sisters and was amazed how close to their reality mine is. I am filled w/family all around me and the joys and saddness that spreads to me is s... Tue, 30 Aug 2011 02:10:12 EST