LRHODES8's SparkPeople Blog LRHODES8's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Trying Harder I am trying harder to focus on making healthier decisions about my life. This losing weight process is non-stop! I'm overwhelmed by the constant small and big decisions I am faced with throughout the day regarding the goal of losing weight. I forget to drink water...I choose not to drink water.... I drink a little water....and the issues go on and on. I've lost about 24 pounds very slowly (over about 3 years) but now I need to get serious and lose the weight at a faster pace. I feel like... Mon, 3 Mar 2014 21:57:20 EST Trying to Understand Tonight I am trying to understand what lead to my current health status and weight. I find myself really reflecting on problems with relationships that go way back-even when I was a young girl. I guess I can dwell on the past or make up my mind to go forward from this point on. I really don't want to dwell on the past yet I don't want to repeat mistakes. So I guess I'm trying to find a sense of balance in my life rather than feeling like I am being pulled by a variety of people in a bunch... Sat, 23 Jun 2012 04:03:41 EST The Gift of Time I am very thankful that I now have some time to myself. I love teaching but by June there is so much pressure and so much to accomplish that it can get crazy. This past month or so has not been that great for my weight. I have just been doing what I can to get by and to survive the moment...and that is not the best approach to use. So, tonight I am grateful for the gift of having some time now to work on me and to simply enjoy my life more. Thu, 21 Jun 2012 01:54:52 EST Starting to Breakthrough My Denial I can't say that I've completely changed the sense of denial I feel about my weight. However, it is strange that after now losing almost 30 pounds (from my heaviest point) I sometimes feel MORE aware of just how heavy I am than ever before. I found out recently how much two of my friends weigh and it was very, very humbling to me because I was so sure they weighed more than me...and they don't. They weigh less. So, I am having to face the harsh realization that the me I see in the mirror ... Wed, 2 May 2012 01:35:23 EST