LOOZINITNOW's SparkPeople Blog

Gym Time

Wed, 15 May 2013 13:33:23 EST

Hey Sparkies! It was time to make some changes in my life with health and fitness. I was becoming bored with the treadmill at home and workout videos. Since my surgery, heat is not my friend so going outside is out of the question too.

I decided to challenge myself to do something that I have never done before. I joined a gym. Sunday afternoon, knowing it was a long shot, I asked my hubby if he would join a gym with me. By some miracle, he said "YES!" I was so excited! I went and ...

Break Through

Tue, 30 Apr 2013 19:38:05 EST

Hey! Two blogs in a day! It's a miracle, lol! For all of you who know me well, you know that I have had a lot going on lately as well as just having some mental road block. Well, things are starting to happen for the better.

I am not going to go into a long story but I have been dealing with a lot of baggage (otherwise known as being rejected by my father and father-in-law) from my life that I have had trouble getting rid of. I blame a lot of my emotional eating on it. I have been...

Not Enough Time

Tue, 30 Apr 2013 09:49:03 EST

Hey Sparkies! Just wanted to take a moment to check in and let you know what is going on in my world. I am still here, just not as active on Spark as I would like to be. I have been working more hours and on top of that my hubby is traveling for work now and is gone from home much of the time. He is gone the entire week this week. When he is home, we spend as much time as possible together. This leaves me having to take care of everything around the house on my own which eats up any spare tim...

Starting Here, In This Moment

Sun, 7 Apr 2013 09:34:15 EST

Hey Sparkies! I am alive and doing well. I am slowly starting to feel the motivation and excitement of my journey coming back. A week ago tomorrow, I started a Facebook Biggest Loser contest. I decided that this was a good opportunity to do something fun and help regain my footing. Tomorrow, is our one week weigh in. I am actually excited to weigh in. I feel bits and pieces of the former me reaching out and wanting more. I'm starting to remember that fit and happy feeling that I had not so lo...

Identity Crisis

Tue, 26 Mar 2013 18:13:35 EST

I really do not want to be writing this blog for fear of sounding like an idiot but I need to try to put it all out there in words.

I have had a lot of ups and downs since my surgery almost 9 weeks ago. I have been depressed, happy, mad, sad, angry and everything in between. I am doing a lot better since deciding to use hormone replacement therapy a couple of weeks ago. It was a hard choice but one that was right for me. I am starting to feel much better although there is still a...

A Time For Love

Wed, 6 Mar 2013 10:22:19 EST

I am now two days into making myself the #1 priority again. I am thoroughly enjoying using Spark Coach and feel that it has given me that little extra boost that I have been missing but something is still missing.

Upon close examination of myself, I realized that I have stopped loving myself again. I stay away from mirrors. I am scared of what the scale says and do not want to own up to the number staring back at me. I'm wanting to isolate myself more often. I've also noticed that...

Time For Change

Mon, 4 Mar 2013 19:59:37 EST

Ironically, the title of my last blog was, "I Don't Do Change Well". Well, since then, I have decided to change things up on my own by choice.

I went clothes shopping for work clothes last Friday being that I have once again outgrown (face of shame) 24 my clothes. We are talking three totes full of various sizes of outgrown clothing stored away. After trying on many things and only purchasing a few, I left the store on a low note.

Since then, I have been dep...

I Don't Do Change Well

Thu, 28 Feb 2013 23:30:40 EST

Well, a week ago, I was on fire and back to healthy habits despite still working on recovery. I was feeling positive and ready to take control again. Then, life threw me for a loop and I went out of control again.

It all started out with a substantial mood swing last Friday. I was just not myself for a couple of days. I was beyond irritable and lashing out at everyone who looked at me funny. I just wanted to sit and zone out or lay in bed. It was not pretty. Praise the Lord, it pas...

Your Body Knows Best

Wed, 20 Feb 2013 12:30:40 EST

I still get so amazed by what a difference making small changes can do. Two days ago, I was concerned about sleeping and wondering if I would ever be able to get this weight back off since being put into menopause. I'm not gonna lie, I was scared! Two days later, I am sleeping like a baby and have lost 5lbs!

What did I do? I changed up my diet. I quit drinking caffeine and replaced it with nothing but water. I'm eating lots of protein and raw veggies and fruits. I continue to get o...

Up And Back At It

Mon, 18 Feb 2013 15:54:37 EST

I am now just over three weeks post surgery. I have not been able to do a whole lot over the last three weeks. I am starting to come around and have started getting up and moving more. The weather was absolutely gorgeous yesterday so I left the house and took a walk outside. I was able to get in 15 minutes or so before I started getting uncomfortable. I see it as a start. I'm getting around the house more and starting to do more again but my back becomes easily sore after standing very long. ...

Wake Up Call

Fri, 8 Feb 2013 16:15:29 EST

Hello friends! Sorry it has been so long since my last contact with Spark. This last week has been tiring. I've still been dealing with some pain and tiredness and it's just hard to want to motivate to do anything beyond laying on the couch or in my chair. I do get up and try to do a few small chores every morning and then when I am done, I am exhausted for the rest of the day. Sitting in a hard chair on the desk top is not very appealing and I do not like Sparking on my phone or the tablet. ...

This Battle of the Bulge (May be TMI w/some humor)

Thu, 31 Jan 2013 15:36:10 EST

I know I am a heavy girl. Duh! Look at my weight. Yes, I am blessed with height which helps mask some of it. I can usually take an outfit and make it look pretty good, right? Well, the reality of it all has hit me.

I can pretend to use my height. I can hide in just the right clothing but it all comes down to the fact that I am only trying to hide a real problem. This all dawned on me in the last few days since the surgery. Normally, I do not spend time looking in the mirror at my ...

Post-Op Check In

Thu, 31 Jan 2013 11:45:23 EST

Hey Sparkies! It's been one week ago today that I had my uterus, cervix, fallopian tubes and ovaries all removed due to years of complications. The surgery was uneventful and went well. I stayed in the hospital overnight and then most of the next day. They were very good to me and took really good care of me. I came home the second evening and spent most of the first few days sleeping like I never have (probably due to anesthesia and pain management). I am starting to get up and around more t...

Taking A Step Back To Rest

Sat, 19 Jan 2013 22:57:44 EST

Good evening Sparkies! Sorry that I have been so quiet. I may be that way for a while. I'm just finding myself too tired and drained to do much of anything. I have good days and bad days dealing with the increasing pain. I have not been sleeping well and I am fatigued by mid-afternoon. I have decided to step out of the challenges that I am involved in and just rest. I do not feel up to committing and that is not fair to the teams. I am looking forward to getting this over with and behind me a...

Bad News Is Sometimes Good News

Tue, 15 Jan 2013 20:46:30 EST

Hey Sparkies! I have been quiet the last few days. I have a lot going on right now. My son has been really sick since the weekend. I took him to the Dr today and got him checked out. Thank goodness, he does not have pneumonia. Just a bad cold with some asthma going on. I also found out this morning that I will be having a total hysterectomy possibly as soon as next Thursday. It's scary but exciting at the same time after two years of fighting my reproductive system and not winning. So, I have...

Lisa...1- Devil...0

Fri, 11 Jan 2013 17:52:53 EST

Yesterday before work, I had to go by Target to pick up a prescription. Going to Target means facing the Starbucks that sits directly in front of the cash registers. As I paid, I peeked up at my beloved and tried to quickly fight off the urge. I thought I was going to be good with it and then the second I left the register and found myself standing directly in front of it, it seemed like time stopped. I just stood staring at the menu and my head suddenly filled with chit chat from all around....

It's A Family Thing

Sat, 5 Jan 2013 11:53:26 EST

I have owned a Fitbit for a couple of years now. I loved it the first year that I owned it and then got slack about wearing it last year. I began wearing it again this year and now remember why I love this little gadget so much! It really does motivate me to move more.

My daughter, who is 18, thankfully is very weight conscious and had asked if she could have my old pedometer. It needed a battery before it could be used. I knew at that moment that she would love a Fitbit. I ordere...

My Clothes Goal

Tue, 1 Jan 2013 20:28:30 EST

Happy New Year Spark friends! It has been a great start to the new year for me. I was really worried about the fact that I went to bed at 2:30 last night and whether or not I would be functional today. I have been wide awake and able to get quite a bit accomplished around the house as well as work on personal things for myself. I downloaded a journal app on my Kindle and began writing and plan on continuing to write daily throughout the year. I want to document everything this year because it...

It's Everywhere!

Thu, 13 Dec 2012 10:14:25 EST

Oh the joy of the holidays! Being in the workplace during the holidays is proving to be a challenge. Little did I know that the office would become saturated with all kinds of tempting goodies. We are not talking about Oreos or Debbie Cakes here. We are talking about premium, top of the line chocolates, cakes, popcorn and such. 40

Yesterday, I decided to say NO! I will not partake in those things. I packed some almonds and took them to work with me. Watching my coworke...

You Can Run But You Can't Hide

Tue, 11 Dec 2012 21:37:50 EST

I'm not gonna lie. Things have been rough for a few months. I have been up, down and everywhere in between. I started a new job after being a stay at home mom for 20 years. I had a cancer scare and surgery. My son had an injured knee for a few weeks and the list goes on and on. But, what I did wrong was let those things become forefront in my mind and taking care of myself became less important. I would try and then give up. Try again and give up until about a month or so ago, I just gave up ...

Gotta Get It Together

Thu, 22 Nov 2012 22:15:05 EST

Sorry for the long silence Sparkies. I have let life once again consume me. No real excuses other than lack of planning and truthfully not caring to take the time to plan. I couldn't think of a better day than today, a day of giving thanks for being so blessed to think about taking better care of myself.

It's been a long couple of weeks. My son is still injured. I took him to Urgent Care a few days ago. X-rays were done. No breaks or anything but blood and fluid was seen under the...

Surgery Update

Wed, 14 Nov 2012 21:24:33 EST

Yesterday, I went to my gyno for my follow up from my surgery almost three weeks ago. Can I say "I am relieved?!!!" She told me that she found a growth in the opening of one of my fallopian tubes that greatly concerned her along with massive amounts of tissue around the lining of my uterus. The pathologists examined the samples very closely and thank the Lord, no pre-cancer or cancer was found! I will have to monitor my monthly cycles and take Provera when needed to keep things regulated. She...

Busy, Busy, Busy

Tue, 6 Nov 2012 19:14:37 EST

Hey hey my sparkling friends! Yes, I have been sparse on Sparkpeople the last week. All for good reasons though. It's been a very busy few days but I am still hanging on and doing well.

Friday night, I got to watch my daughter be proposed to. It was the neatest thing ever! He did it at the college that they attend because that is where they met. He hid the ring inside a pair of cowboy boots that she had really wanted and she found it as she put the boots on. He took it out and ask...

Recovering

Sun, 28 Oct 2012 21:40:06 EST

Hey Sparkies! I have been quiet the last few days but that was in part to the fact that I went through my female related surgery last Thursday. All went fairly well. Recovery has been hard due to the cramping and bloating but I will survive. I will not know anything specific until 2 weeks from Tuesday. That is when I go back for my follow up and to discuss the lab results from the tissue samples that she took. I'm anxious but praying for a good outcome.

My eating was off this week...

My New Playmate

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 15:52:50 EST

I made some major commitments to myself this month and so far, so good! I am impressed with how far I have come in the first 18 days of October. I finally feel like I am back for good! With motivation and results comes the time to turn up the burner and get creative with my fitness. I am not one to stick to one thing very long so I have to have lots of options. So, this past weekend I added a new playmate to my fitness.

Meet my new friend....

Free As Teenagers

Sun, 17 Jun 2012 20:08:39 EST

As many of you know it was a crazy stressful week. I took the past three days to regroup my thoughts and just relax. I am ready to take on a fresh and preferably uneventful week.

Friday, I decided I needed a pick me up and took myself shopping. I haven't done that in a while for the simple fact that I knew I needed to jump up a size on the bottom since last summer. It breaks my pride knowing that I am back in the plus size section after shopping in the misses/juniors a year or so ...

Welcome My Daughter

Thu, 14 Jun 2012 21:57:28 EST

We are all recovering slowly from the dog incident. Truthfully, my kids were very mature about it and it was tougher on me than it was them. I would rather deal with myself crying then have to listen to their hearts break. Apparently, the week has taken it's toll because I did not wake up until 9:30 this morning. That is so not like me. I guess my body knew what I needed.

I never got a chance before the chaos started to introduce my daughter who is now on Sparkpeople. She does not...

Only Memories Left

Wed, 13 Jun 2012 10:35:36 EST

Our black lab passed during the night last night. From what we could tell, he was either bit by a snake or a spider. He got sick and passed away very quickly. By the time we realized he had become basically paralyzed it was too late.

We prepared the kids last night and they are doing rather well. Me, not so much. It breaks my heart too much. In the 3 months we owned him, he brought a lot of laughter and joy to our family. We will cherish the pictures and the memories.

I'...

Rough Day

Tue, 12 Jun 2012 22:54:48 EST

Hey guys! I'm really tired and wanting to go to bed but my head is not ready to shut down. It's been a rough couple of days emotionally. Our black lab pup that we acquired as a stray about three months ago is dying. He was fine and suddenly took a sharp turn for the worst yesterday and is going downhill fast. As bad as he is, the vet said it would take $400-$500 to keep him and put him on IV's but they could not guarantee that he would make it. We are not sure what happened but think maybe po...

Living Wheat Free

Wed, 6 Jun 2012 17:23:30 EST

I have officially been doing the gluten free thing for 2 weeks and 2 days now. In that 2 weeks, I have lost 8lbs and regained a lot of energy. Has it been trying at times? I'm not gonna lie, yes it has! Have I slipped once or twice? Yes, I have and I could tell it. My daughter's boyfriend made some cookie/brownie bars for my daughter's birthday Sunday and I convinced myself that just one would not hurt anything. That just one sent me back into the cycle of not only craving more but crashing s...

Rollercoasters and Ramblings

Tue, 29 May 2012 21:35:01 EST

Hey Sparkies! It's been a few days since I have gotten a chance to get on. My mom became very sick last Wednesday with cellulitis and was put in the hospital for three days. She is now home receiving antibiotics at home and recovering well. She deals with recurring bouts of this but it had been three years since she had last gotten it. Summer is a bad time for it as the heat aggravates it. She has to try to stay dry and cool as much as possible. This is one of the many reasons that I know my ...

I'm Back

Mon, 21 May 2012 09:51:49 EST

After many weeks of playing the crazy mother of a senior in high school, it is officially over! Events, graduation and parties are all finished! So, where does this leave me? Feeling old with a daughter that is beginning college but more importantly wanting to find myself again more than ever before.

I slipped far, far away from anything healthy the last few weeks. All three meals were fast, in the car and and very unhealthy (that does not include the candy and caffeine that kept ...

Stii Living The Crazy Life

Wed, 9 May 2012 20:18:26 EST

I'm alive, I promise! Things are still in full swing my daughter's senior year ending. This week has already consisted of her receiving an award for graduating with honors, her senior banquet and she made the local university Color Guard! Now we are gathering things and getting her ready to take off for St. Louis for a few days with the band. Phew! I need a break!

This past weekend we worked on the bathroom and got it completely finished. It looks so much better and has some warmth...