LILBLKDRESS09's SparkPeople Blog LILBLKDRESS09's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Why I don't count Calories I was first introduced to calorie counting in 2009 right after having my daughter. I felt like such a failure for not losing the weight fast enough even though I was counting everything that went into my mouth. I began to get depressed and scale obsessed. <BR> <BR> I was on a yo-yo. I would lose some gain back more. After I did a whole 30 last year. I re-taught myself to eat. I no longer count calories. Instead I am mindful of hydration ( drink enough water) and portions. I am mindful of ho... Wed, 20 May 2015 12:35:12 EST Day's 4-8 of the whole 30 I made it to day 5 this time. But then I realized that I had run out of the foods that I could eat at home and I had run out of money in the bank. My husband and I are trying to buy a home so we are on a budget. I decided that I am going to do the best that I can for this whole 30. I don't think it possible at this time to eliminate all the food groups that are recommended. So I am going to focus on the sugar. I am going to continue the whole 30 as eliminating the artificial sugars. <BR> <B... Tue, 12 May 2015 11:25:48 EST Day 3 of the whole 30 I am not feeling so hot today. Have a little bit of a cold and want to just drink some hot chocolate. It's ok though.. I am determined to get my 30 days in. <BR> <BR> Have a great day everyone. Thu, 7 May 2015 11:40:25 EST Day 2 of the whole 30 No one should be responsible for how you view your self or your body. Often we allow others opinions of us to define how we see ourselves. It took me a long time to get over all of the negative things that were said about me. <BR> <BR> But once I did, a whole new world of possibilities opened up. It was possible for me to be beautiful and not thin.. and it was possible for me to be healthy and not thin. Suddenly being thin was not the objective anymore. Being healthy was. <BR> <BR> Don't a... Wed, 6 May 2015 11:21:58 EST Day 1 of the Whole 30 My mom has been here for a week and I decided to restart my whole 30 since I have over indulged... a little ( ok a lot) but that is what life is about. It's about the moments that make up some of your most precious memories. <BR> <BR> I try not to beat myself up regarding my food choices. I know that this is a lifestyle change not a diet. I am no hurry to look like a model. I want to be healthy and feel my best all the time. That way I can be an inspiration and a rock for my family. <BR> <... Tue, 5 May 2015 13:05:07 EST Day 5 of the whole 30 I am a little tired today. But I think it is because I was up all night with sick babies. On the plus side I feel a lot less bloated today and my jeans fit better. Only 25 days to go I know that I can do this. I have done it before. The best advice I have heard so far.. is to take it day by day try not to dwell on future events. My mom is visiting next week and I am dreading trying to stick to the program. But then I remind myself that I stuck to the program during Thanksgiving and Christmas ... Fri, 24 Apr 2015 12:07:20 EST Day's 3-4 of The whole 30 I didn't write yesterday I was just too grumpy.. the lack of sugar was really getting to me. I even had a dream that I was eating chocolate cake lol. But today I have woken up in a much better mood. I feel re-energized. ( I don't remember struggling this much the fist time I did the whole 30) <BR> <BR> Happy Thursday everyone! <BR> <BR> <BR> <em>386</em> Thu, 23 Apr 2015 12:18:35 EST Day 2 : of the Whole 30 I didn't think that I would be missing it this much. But I miss the little bit of sugar that I was consuming in my coffee every morning. <BR> <BR> 28 days to go :) Tue, 21 Apr 2015 12:41:55 EST Today Marks day One: ( Whole 30) Right before Thanksgiving I did a whole 30 challenge it was great I felt great. I have kept up with my new ways of eating pretty well. I allow one day of the week of eating out. I want to attempt another whole 30. I am doing this mostly to inspire my family. My husband is starting to want to eat better and I want to help establish good eating habits in my children. The first time around I did the whole 30 for me. But this time I am doing it for my family. If they see that I can do it. Then th... Mon, 20 Apr 2015 12:48:38 EST The compliments I used to wait around for the compliments to start, as if hearing " Wow you lost weight." Would somehow magically make my self esteem sky rocket.. that somehow hearing other people say it...then I would start to believe that I was beautiful. <BR> <BR> But this time around it has had the opposite effect. I no longer wait around for the compliments. I already know that I am beautiful and I love my body just as it is. When I hear a compliment now... I simply say thank you. <BR> <BR> But I no l... Fri, 17 Apr 2015 10:57:41 EST Here's the thing... I am not perfect. I am far from it. It is a daily struggle to take care of myself and to try and make better choices for my body. I try not to dwell on pounds and how big I think I may be. I try to treat myself with kindness...but it doesn't always end up that way. <BR> <BR> I need to remember to tell myself that I am worth it.. and I am telling you too. You are worth it!!! <BR> <BR> <BR> Happy Friday! Fri, 10 Apr 2015 13:51:33 EST It's ok to be you You are beautiful and unique. You are perfect just how you are. <BR> <BR> It took me many years to finally believe this message for myself. But it is true for every single one of you out there. <BR> <BR> I stopped focusing on the numbers.. and began to focus on me. I wanted to feel better. I wanted to look better, but above all I wanted to love myself better. <BR> <BR> It all starts with how you choose to view yourself. <BR> <BR> Chose to see your beauty and treat yourself with love an... Thu, 9 Apr 2015 13:37:53 EST Monday's Are my Favorite They are a chance to start over. They are the chance to change perspectives. They are the chance to let go. <BR> <BR> I dwelled for so long on the things that I didn't have. I dwelled on the facts that I couldn't change. I lived this way for 6 years. I hated my body.. I hated my life.. and above all I hated myself. <BR> <BR> I am finally ready to let go.. <BR> <BR> I don't hate myself or my body. I love getting up in the morning and choosing my outfits.. I love dressing my body and I love... Mon, 6 Apr 2015 12:46:40 EST I am taking my time I find that when I try to set an X amount of pounds to be lost in X amount of time.. It = Me Panicking. <BR> <BR> So I have rewritten my formula for success. <BR> <BR> Unknown amount of pounds in Unknown amount of time = Me happy <BR> <BR> I am taking it day by day.. not everyday is perfect but I am still going to get where I am going no matter how fast or how slow. <BR> <BR> My only goal for to get under 200 pounds which is more then doable. Yes I am happier not making the nu... Fri, 3 Apr 2015 10:55:51 EST Root Canals Are not fun...enough said. Happy Thursday everyone! Thu, 2 Apr 2015 12:03:12 EST We all struggle let it go and move on. <BR> <BR> Have a great day everyone! Wed, 25 Mar 2015 12:06:01 EST Believing in yourself You posses the power to make a difference.. not only in your life but in the lives of others. I know that it can get discouraging at times.. and sometimes it seems unlikely that your actions or the goals that you have for yourself can and or will affect those around you. But they do! <BR> <BR> You need to rise above it all and make a difference. This life is too short to live on the sidelines. <BR> <BR> Happy Thursday Everyone! <BR> <BR> <BR> <em>30</em> Thu, 12 Mar 2015 12:21:24 EST Celebrate the small things I have a long way to go to reach any of my physical or personal goals. Although sometimes the realization of how far I have to go dawns on me and I start to get overwhelmed. I try to remain positive and cut myself some slack. I haven't been working out like I would like to. But I am getting over a cold and I just have no energy. <BR> <BR> Normally I would beat myself up about it and eventually self medicate with food. I am finally in a place in my life where food is no longer the answer or ... Wed, 11 Mar 2015 11:51:43 EST Not always as planned It's funny how when it comes to weight loss everyone has an opinion. Everyone has the secret to losing it fast... but when you mention that your not in a hurry or that you don't mind losing 1lb at a time.. people don't always get it. But news flash I am doing this for me and only me. <BR> <BR> I don't deprive myself.. there are days that I eat nothing but junk and there are weeks that I don't exercise. But I never give up on myself.. I never stop believing. <BR> <BR> Things don't always ... Mon, 9 Mar 2015 11:39:31 EST Progress Picutres I have gotten into the habit of taking progress pictures... I think that you can really see the changes in pictures, even if the scale doesn't show. <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> Jan/2015 <BR> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> March/2015 <BR> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> * Slowly but surely there will progress. Happ... Fri, 6 Mar 2015 12:43:23 EST Balance It's easy to get caught up in the game of losing weight. You become obsessed with the numbers, calories in and calories out. how much the scale says you weigh. How many ounces of water you drank that day. <BR> <BR> It is very easy and it happens very quickly. You go from trying to lose weight to all of a sudden starting to develop a eating disorder. <BR> <BR> There has to be balance. You have to make changes that you can sustain while living a normal life. Not all days are perfect. You wil... Tue, 3 Mar 2015 13:54:44 EST Not always productive Sometimes as work I find myself surfing the net or day dreaming... and then I get side tracked and don't get all of my work done.. I really need to not do this and stay focused. This is my goal for March. What are you goals? <BR> <BR> <BR> Happy Monday! Mon, 2 Mar 2015 12:06:07 EST 30 days I am starting another round of the whole 30. :) Wed, 25 Feb 2015 11:24:10 EST Goal's ( Before 30th Birthday) Run a Marathon <BR> Compete in Iron Man Triathlon <BR> Get accepted In Nursing Program <BR> Buy Home <BR> Have a savings account (with money in it) <BR> Lose all the baby weight ( I have 35 pounds to go!) <BR> Read 30 books ( 1 for every year of my life) <BR> Continue to write in my Journal everyday <BR> Continue to play Football ( I want to play a tight end) <BR> <BR> These next two years are going to be awesome!!!! <BR> <BR> Happy Friday Everyone! <BR> <BR> <BR> Fri, 20 Feb 2015 13:35:20 EST So emotional I am super emotional today. I have eaten 3 girl scout cookies.. and 1/2 a chocolate frosty. I am trying to keep the emotions under control. ( I hate the time of the month) I am going to go home and get on my elliptical and watch friends. Thu, 19 Feb 2015 17:41:22 EST I am 28 today I am excited and blessed to celebrate another year in my life. I have 2 years till I am 30 and I have so much that I want to accomplish before then. 30 is the new 20 <BR> <BR> Happy Hump Day everyone! Wed, 18 Feb 2015 11:02:45 EST Don't be so quick to judge Just because I want to lose weight and change my body. It doesn't mean that I hate my body or that I don't like myself. On the contrary I am doing this because I love myself. I love being able to run a mile and not run out of breath. I love the way my body aches after a workout. I love knowing that I am getting stronger and that I feel better. <BR> <BR> We all have our own reasons for deciding to lose weight. The many times before that I was not able to maintain the weight loss.. I did it fo... Tue, 17 Feb 2015 12:09:51 EST Just keep going...just keep going... No matter how long the journey seems... just keep going. I have to remind myself daily of this as I am still stuck in this Plateau... I am sure that I will get past it soon enough. I am trying not to focus so much on the number on the scale and focus on how mush stronger I am becoming. <BR> <BR> <BR> Happy Monday Everyone! Mon, 16 Feb 2015 12:54:45 EST Emotional Eating We all do it.. and there is no shame over here, though I do have to stop myself sometimes when I find that I am stuffing my face with Cheetos out of nervousness. <BR> <BR> Some days on this journey will be text book and others will be a train wreck. Embrace the ride and don't worry so much about how fast you are losing the weight. <BR> <BR> Put in the work and the rest will fall into place. <BR> <BR> I have been at a plateau since Feb 2, 2015 it's driving me nuts.. but I am pushing past ... Fri, 13 Feb 2015 13:38:06 EST Back at the gym today! I can tell that I am starting to become addicted to my morning workouts! <BR> <BR> <BR> Happy Thursday everyone! Thu, 12 Feb 2015 11:27:05 EST You need a day off (really) As much as I enjoy going to the gym and sweating it out. I do and we all do need a day to let our bodies rest. <BR> <BR> So I am enjoying my day off. Can't wait to get home and watch me some Friends. <BR> <BR> Happy Hump Day!!! Wed, 11 Feb 2015 14:28:44 EST Sometimes you have to work past it The pain can sometimes lead to success.. at least in the gym :) <BR> <BR> Happy Tuesday Everyone! Tue, 10 Feb 2015 11:55:25 EST Starting to plateau I am not going to give up. My body maybe resisting the change but I will push forward. <BR> <BR> Happy Monday Everyone! Mon, 9 Feb 2015 15:35:48 EST I am ready I am ready to live my life. I am ready to stop giving up. I am ready to became who I have always known I could be. I am ready to thrive <BR> <BR> <BR> It is never too late to start over and it's never to late to correct past mistakes. Fri, 6 Feb 2015 13:45:54 EST Even if changes are small keep going (pictures) Progress sometimes is small. I don't rely only on the scale so I take pictures. <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> Jan/2015 <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> Feb/2015 <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Thu, 5 Feb 2015 14:24:57 EST Taking it one day a time Sometimes I have to remind myself of this. I have to slow down and realize that everything is going to be ok. <BR> <BR> I may have not lost all the weight yet or I may have not accomplished everything that I want to yet. But I am getting there. <BR> <BR> Have a great Hump Day everyone! Wed, 4 Feb 2015 18:45:01 EST February is here! I am hoping to get under 210 this month and I am also hoping to keep my gym stride going. I met with my personal trainer this morning.. I am excited about all the new exercises she has shown me. <BR> <BR> Make today a good one :) Mon, 2 Feb 2015 10:52:48 EST I am looking forward to the future I have spent the past 2 1/2 years wallowing in self hate because I couldn't lose the weight I would do so well and then throw it all away with a binge followed by another because I was ashamed and disgusted with myself. <BR> <BR> But I am no longer the same girl. I am done hating myself and done blaming food for all that is wrong in my life. Food and the scale only have the power if you give it to them. It has taken me this long to realize that food it not the enemy and that the scale is not... Fri, 30 Jan 2015 12:37:54 EST You need to only compare yourself to yourself Sometimes it's hard to remember that you shouldn't compare yourself to anyone but yourself. I find it especially hard when people start comparing your progress with theirs and making rude comments. <BR> <BR> I skipped all last week at the gym I was sick with the flu and had no energy. There are some people in my life that can't seem to let that go. <BR> <BR> Trying to remain positive and motivated today. <BR> <BR> Wed, 28 Jan 2015 11:37:24 EST Janurary is almost over I am so ready to get February started! I am hoping that it will be the month that I am finally under 210lbs in over 2 years... :) I know I can and I know that you can achieve your goals too. Tue, 27 Jan 2015 12:29:33 EST Happy Today is a good day. It is good to have a peaceful none stressful day once in awhile. I woke up with more energy today and I made it to my morning workout. Now I am planning on going home cooking dinner and relaxing with my children. <BR> <BR> Have a great rest of your day everyone! Thu, 22 Jan 2015 17:35:09 EST So tired! I didn't go the gym yesterday morning or today, I am so tired I can hardly function right now...must be due to my monthly friend... Any suggestions for more energy? Wed, 21 Jan 2015 11:50:43 EST Not giving up this time! So many times before I give up on myself and as I near my 2 month of eating clean and working out I have to wonder why it's so different this time? <BR> <BR> The answer: I am done <BR> <BR> done feeling sorry for myself <BR> done caring what others think of me <BR> done of hating myself <BR> <BR> Have a great Tuesday everyone! <em>30</em> <em>320</em> <em>482</em> <BR> <BR> * January is almost over.. are you where you want to be with your goals? Tue, 20 Jan 2015 10:57:12 EST Mind over body Sometimes I get cravings, like today I want to stick my head in a bucket of fudge.. but then I realize that I ate my breakfast had my snacks drank my water.... I am just stressed out and want fudge.. Thu, 15 Jan 2015 13:41:21 EST Hump Day ( leg day) I never imagined that I would sweat more from a 30min weights session then I would 30 min cardio session. <BR> <BR> My legs feel like jelly and I am loving it :) <BR> <BR> p.s. I think I am starting to get addicted to my morning gym sessions. Wed, 14 Jan 2015 11:42:29 EST 2015 the year of the new! New me! I am on week two of gym and I got a personal trainer! Tue, 13 Jan 2015 10:54:38 EST Moving Forward It took me a long time to forgive myself for allowing myself to fall so deep into self hate. But I am finally in a place where I am no longer in self loathing. I am ready to take charge of my life I am ready for positive changes in my life. Both physically and spiritually. <BR> <BR> We have to be brave enough to face our inner demons. We have to be smart enough to know that food is not the enemy. And above all we have to have the courage to change. <BR> <BR> I am done hating myself <BR> d... Mon, 12 Jan 2015 12:52:13 EST Moderation is key I ate a burger from carl's jr yesterday. I am not ashamed and I don't regret it. I am moving on it was just another meal. I am learning that food had no control over me. <BR> <BR> Happy Hump Day! Wed, 7 Jan 2015 12:30:44 EST It's the first Monday of 2015 Make it a good one! Mon, 5 Jan 2015 10:53:42 EST Going out and enjoying life I know that losing weight can be hard, It can be painful. And sometimes it can be scary. But what I have come to that life is not on hold while you lose weight. You have to do best with what is handed to you and move on. <BR> <BR> My husband surprised me yesterday with dinner and a movie. So I ate pasta and popcorn we split everything and I have no regrets I am not going to beat myself up about it. I am back to it today. <BR> <BR> One night out with my husband will not ruin my we... Fri, 2 Jan 2015 10:53:35 EST