LBFROMBUFAD's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=LBFROMBUFAD LBFROMBUFAD's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Day 13. I Really Miss Half & Half http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5731293 I've been fine without so many things, but not having half and half in my coffee is destroying me. I'm not even drinking coffee because drinking it black feels like a punishment. <BR> <BR> Coconut milk "creamer" is sweetened and I LOATHE sweet coffee, so there really is no non-dairy alternative that isn't riddled with corn syrup solids or chemicals. I am sad. <BR> <BR> Then I get mad because I think I'm crazy to want to cheat just for a DECENT CUP OF COFFEE when there's tea and stuff, but... Thu, 3 Jul 2014 11:59:18 EST Weathered A Storm http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5725599 Last night was rough. <BR> <BR> Yesterday morning started out with a bang: I actually got my ass out of bed, got down to my basement and did 20 minutes on my treadmill and then lifted some 8 lb. dumbbells: arms, shoulders, chest. My husband and sons have all these posters on the wall down there for a total body workout - different posters for different body groups, they're very helpful. After MONTHS AND MONTHS AND MONTHS of no official exercise (not counting walks with girlfriends), this... Wed, 25 Jun 2014 11:56:07 EST Little Wins! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5724091 This elimination diet is no joke. I am already beginning to feel a difference in my energy levels, which is very gratifying. <BR> <BR> I hit our local farmer's market on Saturday and picked up a TREMENDOUS head of curly red-leaf lettuce which is enough for two giant salads. The first one is almost gone since the whole family loved it. <BR> <BR> I actually packed my lunch today and made sure I had a huge portion of salad and a nice dish of roasted veggies and leftover quinoa from last ni... Mon, 23 Jun 2014 11:59:18 EST Day 1 - 30 Day Elimination Diet http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5721432 There's lots of things that suck about being fat. I've gotten over a lot of the shame about the way my fat looks, mostly because I dress well for my shape and I'm sassy as hell and I'm too old to be all that worried about it. My husband digs me, that's all that matters to me. <BR> <BR> However, I'm sick of all the health issues I'm having and many of them may because of the foods I have been choosing to eat. Some of it is that my hormones are all fakakata: PCOS and perimenopause do a num... Thu, 19 Jun 2014 13:31:03 EST I Feel Like I Weigh 1,000 Pounds, And 800 Of It Is Christmas http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5579304 Not too much more to say, the title says it all. <BR> <em>15</em> <BR> <BR> I've decided that I'm going to go back to Overeaters Anonymous, at least one meeting a week to kind of keep my head on straight. I know I'm a compulsive overeater, I know I use food to manage my feelings and to help me escape, and I know I'm not going to stop abusing food and my body unless I deal with the underlying crap. <BR> <BR> I'm starting this year with a new attitude -- I'm not so much focused on a goal... Thu, 2 Jan 2014 11:28:30 EST Dumping Random Thoughts Here http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5494908 This has been an odd year for me health-wise. I went through a whole GI Series and happily found out all I have is Irritable Bowel Syndrome which is annoying but not fatal and can be controlled if I avoid MY FAVORITE FOOD ITEMS. Dude, if I could do that, I would NOT need SPARKPEOPLE!!!! <BR> <BR> Yeah, just stop eating white bread or baked goods or anything with flour - which is IN ALL THE DELICIOUS THINGS. I have had feeble starts and attempts at it and for now I'm going to claim prog... Tue, 24 Sep 2013 13:12:47 EST Would You Tell Your Best Friend Her Stomach Is Disgusting? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5439944 I like to read a lot of different websites, from the ridiculous Hollywood gossip to literary to everything in between. <BR> <BR> I found this great article today on XOJane.com, and while I wouldn't tell someone to SHUT UP about talking about how much their body sucks, I kind of agree that this way women bond is toxic and unhelpful. <BR> <BR> <link>www.xojane.com/beauty/unpopular-opin<BR>ion-please-shut-up-about-your-body-issues </link> <BR> <BR> "The effect negative self-talk has on u... Wed, 31 Jul 2013 15:02:01 EST Acting http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5433057 I am pretty sure I wrote a blog entry on this subject before, but I'm too lazy to go back and find it. <BR> <BR> I was talking to a sober friend via Facebook Chat yesterday and both of us were bitching about being heavy and out of shape. I was willing to whine and complain and talk smack about myself but he pulled some AA Jedi Mind Tricks on me and shut me up and got me thinking. <BR> <BR> I'm like an AA expert (well, nobody's perfect, but I can say I've been to thousands of AA meetings an... Thu, 25 Jul 2013 11:42:25 EST This Is My Plan For A New Era Of Health And Awesomeness http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5424128 YES!!!!! <BR> Fresh fruit and veggies -- 5-8 servings a day <BR> Water <BR> Lean meats <BR> whole grains other than wheat <BR> healthy fats <BR> natural sugars <BR> Dairy in moderation <BR> Aspartame in MINIMUM moderation <BR> Consciousness of Portions <BR> Mindful eating <BR> Enjoying what I eat <BR> Learning new ways to prepare veggies <BR> 5-6 meals at home nightly & less take-out <BR> Planning meals for the week ahead of time <BR> Bringing lunch to work <BR> <BR> NO! <BR> Refined white s... Wed, 17 Jul 2013 11:30:58 EST The Hideous Truth http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5422881 Over the last six or so months I have lost my mind and have completely forgotten that: <BR> a) I want to lose 100 pounds <BR> b) I deserve to feed myself nutritious food <BR> c) I am 45 and no longer have the metabolism of a 15 year old <BR> d) I'm pre-diabetic and need to work toward lowering my blood sugar every day <BR> e) That I am a compulsive overeater and addict (in general) and I use food to cope with life and <BR> more often, use food as a club against myself when I am angry w... Tue, 16 Jul 2013 10:07:29 EST The A-Z of Me http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5230086 Borrowed from LIBELULITA: <BR> <BR> A - Available or married: I'll be married for six months on Saturday - having an awesome time. <BR> <BR> B - Book: So many, but let's say A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole and A Wrinkle In Time by Madeline L'Engle - two favorites I can read over and over. <BR> <BR> C - Cake or Pie? : Pie - preferably chocolate cream. <BR> <BR> D - Drink of Choice: Unsweetened Iced Tea with Lemon <BR> <BR> E - Essential Item: Mascara <BR> <BR> F - Favor... Wed, 30 Jan 2013 10:55:48 EST I Haven't Eaten Any Form of Chocolate In The Last Five Days http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5227269 ...and I haven't KILLED ANYBODY!!!! <em>104</em> <em>335</em> <em>218</em> <BR> <BR> It hasn't been a total breeze, I've struggled with temptation, but I'm treating it like I treat alcohol: just not an option. <BR> <BR> I am finding that banishing chocolate means I'm hardly eating any kind of sweet baked goods or sweets of any kind. Chocolate is all I wanted. I'm only going for 30 days, but if it still feels good to avoid chocolate, I might just keep going. <BR> <BR> For today... Mon, 28 Jan 2013 14:08:46 EST FAKING IT UNTIL I MAKE IT Because I'm not Feeling It. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5212892 I've been on and off Sparkpeople, lurking, not really participating because I felt like a phony since I'm not really doing anything. Not really eating well, not eating that bad, but living like I don't have a weight problem. Not working out. <BR> <BR> I have been wondering when the desire to be strong, healthy, fit will overcome my inertia and lack of enthusiasm for "doing the work" to BE strong, healthy and fit. <BR> <BR> Like someone else posted, I KNOW what to do, I just can't seem t... Fri, 18 Jan 2013 11:15:50 EST Trying To Get The Feeling Again http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5170280 This old gem popped into my head when I was thinking of a title for this blog post: <BR> <link>www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfkLaO0e7XY </link> <BR> <BR> It's not about romance for me, it's about my commitment to myself. I miss being all fired up back in the Spring and early Summer. I wish I knew when apathy took over so I can recognize the early warning signs and either ask for help or head it off at the pass. <BR> <BR> ANYHOW, while I have lost a little faith in myself, I haven't lost fa... Tue, 18 Dec 2012 15:29:07 EST Needed To Read This Today... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5096335 I'm a big fan of "thought for the day" type books; I have all kinds: recovery, codependency, compulsive overeating, buddhism, creativity, "living juicy", etc. I don't read each one of them every day - I'd never get to work on time! I just pick the one that "calls" to me and I read what it has to say. I also get a daily email from Hazelden.com (big recovery site) and I saved this one to read over and over, because this is one of my biggest problems: <BR> <BR> "Easy Does It <BR> <BR> So, y... Fri, 12 Oct 2012 10:44:57 EST Today is an Anniversary of A New Beginning http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5091204 Today I have SEVENTEEN YEARS clean and sober. <BR> <BR> 17 years ago I was in so much emotional and spiritual pain that I wanted to die: I couldn't imagine going on living the way I was living, but I didn't know any other way and couldn't imagine living with out alcohol or drugs. My sponsor in OA was also in AA and had quietly and patiently watched me bottom out for months and when I called wailing in despair and talking about how badly I wanted to just STOP EXISTING, he casually suggeste... Mon, 8 Oct 2012 11:41:03 EST New Attitude http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5054378 <link>www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWfZ5SZZ4xE </link> (Yes, I have to post the song, because why should I be the only one with Patti stuck in my head?) <BR> <BR> I am so sick of beating myself up about my little slippin' and backslidin' and stuff. My first thought was to just give up on this "dieting" thing and just be fat and find some way to accept myself as I am, because I can't do this, I can't seem to get it up to work out, I can't do it RIGHT, I can't blah blah lies blah blah negative s... Tue, 11 Sep 2012 12:35:33 EST Sugar Free Me, Day Two http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5037543 Day 1 started off great, two days ago. Then one of my coworkers held out a chocolate frosted donut to me. It had festive sprinkles on it. <BR> <BR> Several brain chemistry processes were triggered and within microseconds, my dopamine centers in my brain lit up like a pinball machine, my best intentions were shoved aside and I became nothing but a being of WANTING. There was no distance between the WANTING and the TAKING and the EATING. Halfway through the donut, I kind of remembered th... Thu, 30 Aug 2012 13:41:47 EST No Sugar - Day 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5034581 All right, my Sparkpeeps, my "motivation" has come back in the form of desperation. I have gained 10 pounds in the last month. I don't need to tell you how discouraging and painful this feels. I am not going to beat myself up, what's done is done, I'm leaving it behind me and focusing on the solution, rather than the problem. <BR> <BR> Although, how is it that it goes on so much faster than it comes off? Oh yeah, I'm 44 and have metabolic syndrome/insulin-resistance/PCOS! That means that ... Tue, 28 Aug 2012 12:00:13 EST Dear Motivation, I Miss You, Come Home! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5025035 Hello, Motivation, it's been a while, I know. So, um, what happened? What did I do? <BR> <BR> In the beginning, we were all kinds of hot and heavy. I woke up, you were there, you actually got me out of bed 5-6 mornings a week when you knew I'd rather snuggle with my husband...people passed around baked goods at work, and there you were, by my side. <BR> <BR> Life was glorious together! We tracked my food, we planned meals, we drank so much water together, it was ridiculous. I felt str... Tue, 21 Aug 2012 14:22:41 EST Back To Life, Back To Reality http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5015241 ..back to the here and now, yeahhh...OK, I'm a nerd who loves 90's R&B. <BR> <BR> <link>www.youtube.com/watch?v=TB54dZkzZOY </link> And yes, I have to post the link to the video because now the song is stuck in my head. Caron Wheeler has a sick voice. <BR> <BR> OK, done with my ADD spaz out/digression. <BR> <BR> I'm back to my "real" life, even though it's slightly different. Same guy as the last nine years but now he's my husband instead of my boyfriend. Same two teenagers but now t... Tue, 14 Aug 2012 14:14:13 EST This Guy "Drew Toothpaste" Is Hilarious http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4996622 He writes these insane comments on company facebook pages, this one had me on the floor, since it's weight loss related, I thought I'd share: <BR> <BR> http://www.drewtoothpaste.com/050712/ <BR> <BR> Yes, it's twisted. Wed, 1 Aug 2012 15:18:48 EST Need To Get Back On Track, For Real http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4991875 Oh brother, do I need to get back on track! <BR> <BR> This weekend was wonderful and crazy. I had my nieces for a second night (they spent the whole week in CT at my mother's house between their first visit and their last with me) and we went to a very fun annual event, the New Milford Village Fair Days. <BR> <BR> For two days at the end of July, our village green is bedecked with white tents from one end to the other. On one end of the green you'll find local businesses, political parties... Sun, 29 Jul 2012 16:03:43 EST It Starts Much Too Early http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4979203 I have mentioned that I live in Teenage Boytown. This whole summer my house feels like the Island of Lost Boys because in addition to my two, we've had at least two or three more who seem like they are always there. It's pretty fun, but I admit that means that my sense of humor is at the level of a teenage boy (fart jokes! woo hoo!) and my feminine sensibilities are brushed to the wayside most of the time. <BR> <BR> Happily I have been blessed with two nieces I loves to pieces! Lorelei is ... Fri, 20 Jul 2012 12:13:35 EST Dreams Coming True Can Be So Stressful http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4973119 I haven't mentioned it yet on here, mostly because I'm so used to keeping it a secret that I'm kind of afraid the cat will be let out of the bag before it's supposed to be, but since I'm so close to "D-Day", here goes: On August 2nd I am eloping and marrying the love of my life!!!!!! It's a secret because we can't afford a wedding and we thought it would be really cool if it was just Randy and me, with the boys as witness. I'm very excited! <BR> <BR> This morning we picked up our marriage ... Mon, 16 Jul 2012 16:20:07 EST Had to Share It...Maybe http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4964645 Coffee Cake with Frosting, it no phase me...but you got cookie! So share it maybe! <BR> <BR> <link>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qTI<BR>Gg3I5y8&feature=player_embedded </link> Tue, 10 Jul 2012 22:20:14 EST DONE GIRLS Red Hot Heartbreakers Mini-Challenge http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4960659 I need a good challenge, so I'm going to participate in the Red Hot Heartbreakers Challenge, here's my goals: <BR> <BR> My goals ~ <BR> Start weight ~ 245 <BR> One Voice (725) ~ <BR> Relaxation (8/15) ~ <BR> Labor Day (9/3) ~ <BR> World Heart (9/29) ~ <BR> Total loss aim ~ 20 lbs!! Woo hoo! Let's get it DONE! <BR> <BR> I'm being ambitious by shooting to lose 2 lbs a week, but if I'm honest with myself and choose not to use food as a crutch, I can do it. <BR> <BR> Here is the body I ... Sun, 8 Jul 2012 14:16:04 EST 50 Questions -- Looks Like Fun http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4960305 Saw this on Redskingirl's blog when I went to her page to congratulate her for having the Done Page of the Month for July. If you want to steal it from me, be my guest, I'd love to get to know you better!!! <BR> <BR> 1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? <BR> My mother claims it was for a character named Laura in a book, but I've never been able to track down this book..."White Birds Flying" -- my middle name Elizabeth is Biblical which is the tradition in my family -- Biblical middle names. <... Sun, 8 Jul 2012 10:07:09 EST Thoughts After Bringing My Older Son to UConn for Orientation http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4953385 On Children <BR> Kahlil Gibran <BR> <BR> Your children are not your children. <BR> They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. <BR> They come through you but not from you, <BR> And though they are with you yet they belong not to you. <BR> <BR> You may give them your love but not your thoughts, <BR> For they have their own thoughts. <BR> You may house their bodies but not their souls, <BR> For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, <BR> which you cannot visit, not e... Tue, 3 Jul 2012 10:59:36 EST Is It Possible To Be In Love With A Sandwich? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4941942 Because I am. Panera bread's Mediterranean Veggie Sandwich. Half a sandwich is 295 DELICIOUS crunchy spicy calories. We had a meeting at work, and they brought lunch in for us (nice) so not only was it delicious but it was FREE. I saved the second half for tomorrow, YAY! <BR> <BR> Here's a shot of the family after Tyler's graduation. <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/7/1/l715747445.jpg"> <BR> <BR> We went for Italian afterwards, and I had the lobster ravioli which I'm ... Mon, 25 Jun 2012 16:11:21 EST Being Human and Having A Twisty, Windy Path http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4936294 The last two weeks have been strange and kind of awesome - only in the sense that I've learned a heck of a lot about myself and it's only made me a little more accepting of myself and a little more committed to this process of getting healthy, losing weight, and cultivating a positive outlook by deeply accepting that I am in this for the long haul. <BR> <BR> I could have written a whole blog post about what a failure I've felt like and how I totally stopped doing EVERYTHING that I had been... Thu, 21 Jun 2012 12:57:23 EST Interesting Connection... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4922012 Lack of sleep can lead to our brain's reward center being more turned on by junk food than if we're well rested: <BR> <BR> <link>www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnew<BR>s/9321697/Lack-of-sleep-may-cause-obes<BR>ity-by-affecting-brains-ability-to-cho<BR>ose-healthy-food.html </link> <BR> <BR> Considering my chronic lack of sleep and my vulnerability to junk this past weekend, I can attest that this might be true. <BR> <BR> One of the things I think I want to add to my list of goals is ... Mon, 11 Jun 2012 16:58:22 EST Mad! I'll Show YOU, Too-High Blood Sugar! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4914323 My doctor called me Monday night to tell me that my fasting blood sugar is 116. ONE HUNDRED SIXTEEN. I hung up and shook both my fists at the skies, screaming, "KHAAAAAAAAN!!!!" and then wanted to cry. <BR> <BR> I was so hoping that my number would have gone down since I've been living a healthier lifestyle, but I have to be honest with myself - it could be healthier. I don't want to get nuts or anything with food restriction (not quantity, quality) because then everything I say is verbot... Wed, 6 Jun 2012 07:56:22 EST Chef Meg's Orange Chicken http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4904995 Tonight I made my first recipe from the Sparkpeople Cookbook. <BR> <BR> FRIGGIN YUMMY!!! I can't believe it was only 210 calories, it was SO delicious! I served it up with some Forbidden Black Rice and a big serving of my favorite squash dish - caramelized onions, basil with the squash thrown in at the last second and heated through for a few minutes, with a sprinkling of goat cheese when on the plate. It was an awesome dinner and even the boys liked it -- the trick with them is to not tel... Wed, 30 May 2012 21:53:54 EST I'm Not The Only One Transforming http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4902500 This weekend something I didn't think would happen for at least a decade happened. My son Ryan asked to get his hair cut. <BR> <BR> Here's Ryan the way I've known him for the last 4 years: <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/9/2/l923190662.jpg"> <BR> <BR> And here's Ryan today: <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/3/7/l371796910.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I liked his long hair, but I love his new haircut! We can see his cute face! <BR> <BR> What is it about makeovers ... Tue, 29 May 2012 10:50:29 EST Happy Memorial Day, Everybody! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4901139 I walked about four miles yesterday, managed to ignore the zeppoles at the Feast of St. Anthony in Little Italy and had a great time with Randy. <BR> <BR> This is brief because we're going to Randy's mom's house for a barbecue today. I'm bringing a big salad full of chopped veggies. <BR> <BR> BY THE WAY if you have the opportunity to see "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel" - I highly recommend it, I LOVED it! Although it made me crave Indian food something fierce. Mon, 28 May 2012 11:56:47 EST Fighting My Way Out Of A Fog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4896083 Since I've started this journey at the end of March I've been pretty motivated and focused. Even when I've had food days way outside my range, I haven't beat myself up or told myself that I shouldn't even BOTHER trying to lose weight, and that one or five heavy meals doesn't mean I've failed and should quit. <BR> <BR> It seems like the last few days I've completely forgotten who I was and what I'm doing. I'm still tracking my food, I'm still making mostly healthy choices, but I haven't exe... Thu, 24 May 2012 11:58:10 EST Mleh http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4893121 I don't have too much to say today, trying to remember that it's all one day at a time. <BR> <BR> My sweet Aunt passed away this morning - she had been battling cancer off and on for several years and while we knew the treatment wasn't working, we didn't think it would happen this fast when she stopped treatment. I'm heartbroken for my Uncle - the two of them have one of the closest relationships I've ever seen, they were BEST friends and were inseparable. <BR> <BR> There isn't going to ... Tue, 22 May 2012 14:46:47 EST Planning Meals For the Week? GREAT Idea! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4887357 The most exciting thing I'm learning about this journey with SP is that a little self-discipline makes big differences. My rebellious nature balked against any and all forms of structure as "stifling" and "uncreative" and whatever other b.s. you want to call it, because I realize that I was b.s.ing myself. <BR> <BR> Last weekend I spent about half an hour looking up recipes (using Tosca Reno's Eat Clean Diet Recharged and the Eat Clean Cookbook) making shopping lists and deciding what we ... Fri, 18 May 2012 14:01:07 EST Temporarily Out Of Gas http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4883220 I don't know if it's the soggy gloomy weather - my super-busy weekend, self-sabotage or what, but I haven't exercised in 4 days straight. In fact, I should be exercising instead of telling all of you that I'm not exercising, but right now I'm watching part 4 of "Weight Of The Nation" on HBO which is alternately breaking my heart and pissing me off. <BR> <BR> My motivation seems to be missing. My food is good - what I don't understand about myself is why can't I have a good food day and a g... Tue, 15 May 2012 21:21:04 EST Monday May 14th 2012 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4881054 What a great weekend! <BR> <BR> Many years ago when I was a young lassie, I was really into what was then called "New Music" - it was the late 80's early 90's and I lived in a college town that has a great radio station and a pretty healthy music scene. Violent Femmes, Depeche Mode, Nine Inch Nails, Ministry, The Cure, The Smiths, Fear, Sisters of Mercy, Joy Division, Siouxsie and the Banshees, B-52's, Public Image Ltd., Erasure. This was right on the edge of grunge and raves. Every Wedn... Mon, 14 May 2012 14:32:52 EST My Scale Is A Jerk http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4874534 Well, not really. I just didn't like what it had to tell me, even though I knew it wouldn't be pretty. And even though I said I wouldn't weigh myself, I couldn't help myself. <BR> <BR> I am reminding myself that I retain water like crazy because this girl can't let go of ANYTHING. I also had a pretty high sodium dinner last night (the boys talked me into KFC and I was too lazy to make myself something that wasn't almost my ENTIRE DAY'S ALLOTMENT of calories, so I won't be doing THAT agai... Wed, 9 May 2012 20:16:06 EST I Might Have Eaten My Weight In Tapas This Weekend http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4870734 I can add a new NSV badge to my sash --- after eating pretty clean for the most part, I am no longer able to eat until I am past full without grave repercussions. <BR> <BR> As I have mentioned, my best friend in the world came to CT this weekend and we had a FANTASTIC time - we laughed and hung out and went shopping and unfortunately, hit a few restaurants together. Add this to TWO birthday parties this weekend, my sweet 16 year old stepson and my boyfriend's niece's 19th - and I am ready... Mon, 7 May 2012 14:45:30 EST Pretty Good Day http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4863761 Gotta give a WOO HOO. I stayed in my calorie range, two days in a row. I squeezed in some rope-jumping and got up to 9 and then 14 in a row (new record). <BR> <BR> I think I'm going to do a rest day for working out because it's getting late and last night I did my Couch to 5K training and couldn't get to sleep until 2:00am which made me a little cranky this morning. <BR> <BR> I'm going to double up my Spring In To Shape Bootcamp Challenge workouts tomorrow and do that in the morning and b... Wed, 2 May 2012 21:26:06 EST Adios April, Hola May! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4861925 I recommitted to my journey towards health and weight loss in late March and came back to Sparkpeople to give it an honest try since I had been kind of lurking but not using all the tools off and on for years. <BR> <BR> My only real goal was to just stick to tracking my food no matter what and try to exercise at least 4 times a week, and I had a bunch of long term goals, but no real structure for myself. One thing I did differently was reach out to the community of Sparkpeeps and I eventual... Tue, 1 May 2012 20:37:12 EST Lesson Learned: My Snacks Need More Substance http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4859640 One of the great things about the Nutrition Tracker is that I can print them out and then look at my whole week in black and white. <BR> <BR> I have noticed a pattern. If I do not have a snack around 3-4pm, and if it does not contain enough fiber or protein, I am RAVENOUS when I get home from work around 6, and I am vulnerable to temptation. Since I live with teenage boys, there ARE snacks in the house that I should leave alone, but several times last week I came home like PacMan and neede... Mon, 30 Apr 2012 16:15:48 EST Not the Best, Not The Worst http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4853978 Despite feeling crappy yesterday afternoon, I drank a lot of water, found my big girl panties and went to meet up with one of the personal trainers at the New Milford Sports Club for my complimentary personal training session. <BR> <BR> I explained to Donna (who is a rockstar and my hero) that I've been working out at home which is why I tried to quit the gym in the first place. She said, "Then let me show you things you can't do at home, maybe you'll want to stay here anyway." <BR> <BR>... Thu, 26 Apr 2012 21:27:22 EST Warning: Whining http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4851810 I usual revel in being female -- cuter shoes, lipstick, I can cry in public without being shamed -- but man oh man, it's not fun this month. My hormones must be in an uproar - I've had a migraine for about three days, and vicious cramps for the last two. <BR> <BR> Naturally, I feel very sorry for myself, and yesterday used this as an excuse to eat certain things that are not clean. I kind of want to do the same thing today, but there's this quote that keeps rolling around in my head: <BR> ... Wed, 25 Apr 2012 14:13:09 EST We Interrupt This Blah Monday Morning For Some Cubicle Dancing... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4848078 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5EmnQp3V48 <BR> <BR> Copy and paste into your browser and shake it down, shake it DOWN DOWN with me!!!!! Mon, 23 Apr 2012 12:19:54 EST Record Store Day! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4845998 Yes, today was record store day. My boyfriend and I took our teenage rocker boys and two of their rocker friends and squashed together in the truck to hit one of the local independently owned record stores. <BR> <BR> I purchased a huge David Bowie compilation full of his hit singles from 1968-1993, the debut album by Alabama Shakes (the lead singer has this amazing powerful blusey Janis Joplinesque voice that makes my hair stand on end), and a Putomayo world music compiation, "Acoustic Braz... Sat, 21 Apr 2012 23:39:36 EST