LAILEE185's SparkPeople Blog LAILEE185's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Stuck in the middle Its been a while since my last update so I figured I should post a blog. I am still actively trying to lose the 30 lbs I gained during my pregnancy over a year ago. I have had lots of up and downs over that time. Peaking at 210lb before knocking some sense into myself and working it back off again. I havent gotten below 189lbs the entire time though. I always get stuck at 190lb. And so I feel as though I have been stuck in the middle for what seems like an eternity. <BR> <BR> I do try to foc... Sat, 27 Jul 2013 15:06:01 EST Jillian's Body Revolution My son wakes up way too early which leads to me watching way too many infomercials. Recently ,after seeing it advertised several times, I decided to check out Jillian Michaels newest series entitled Body Revolution. I personally like her workout dvd's. I have pretty much tried all of them and began my weight loss journey 3 years ago by using the 30 day shred in my routine. I am currently on week 2 of phase 1. Here is my review thus far. <BR> <BR> The thing that intrigued me the most about th... Wed, 6 Feb 2013 10:08:20 EST Motivator of the day This morning I discovered that I was motivator of the day again. My first thought was why me? Ive gained 40lbs back and still havent managed to lose it. Then I shook that nasty negativity out of my brain and had another thought, my glass half full thought. I have maintained a 90lb weight loss for almost 2 years now and through a pregnancy. I may have gained a bit back but I havent given up the fight. <BR> <BR> Now for an update.I gained 15lbs over the holidays bringing my weight to 205lbs.... Sun, 27 Jan 2013 08:19:35 EST Things are looking up Jason and I have made almost 2 weeks now. We have consistently gone to the gym and tried to control our eating. This is the longest I have made it since my son was born. Things are different this time. Instead of jumping in and going cold turkey on the things I like I have taken baby steps. Ive tried to keep busy and not eat when I am bored. It has taken me longer to lose this way but I haven't gained it all back 2 days later like in the past. <BR> <BR> I am down 5lbs thus far weighing in a... Sat, 8 Dec 2012 08:19:13 EST Small Steps Well we have made it 2 days thus far. Today is an off day from the gym so I have to try really hard to keep the eating in check. I had several comments on my previous blog stating that the gym isnt the only form of exercise I should look into. I appreciate the great comments and I do know that this is true. <BR> <BR> I have many at home video options as well as a set of weights at my disposal that I use in addition to our gym. The gym is essential to our family though. After 2+ years my hu... Wed, 28 Nov 2012 08:08:45 EST picking up the pieces Its been a long month and a half. I started strong and then just fizzled out. It may not be so much for others but losing weight while taking care of baby is friggen HARD! The amount of work it takes just to get to the gym exhaust me. <BR> <BR> Both my husband and I have really slacked the past 2 weeks. I am tipping the scale at 199lbs. I cant help but think that had I been consistent and lasted longer than a week I could be at 185lbs. Just like the many previous times before I have reached... Mon, 26 Nov 2012 08:18:44 EST Halloween aftermath It isnt as devastating as I would have thought, If I can stay away from the rest of the candy that is. <BR> <BR> So Im 2 1/2 weeks into my new weight loss journey. I lost 6lbs the first week. I had almost lost another 1lb then my daughters girl scout cookies came in and ya that was horrible. I ate 2 boxes in basically 1 day. I have tried to maintain gym and home exercise though. So i have been staying pretty steady at 192lbs which is a 4lb loss. <BR> <BR> I ate a ton of candy last night. A... Thu, 1 Nov 2012 10:25:42 EST I've been MIA for long enough Isaac turned 6 months old last week. And I have to admit I thought I would be back in shape by now, but sadly i am not. I think i have started over a dozen times between then and now. Even at one point attempting a master cleanse that only lasted 12hrs. I have had binge after binge. I have had a high of 205lbs and a low of 189lbs. The only thing i am proud to say is that i have maintained an average weight of 195lbs for 6months now. <BR> <BR> Enough is enough. Im coming off of a 3 day chocol... Thu, 18 Oct 2012 09:08:00 EST Baby Bus is here! Well baby bus has arrived! I have to sit here and think about how many days since he made his entrance, the days seem to run together. So here is my birth story. <BR> <BR> I had an appointment on Thursday the 5th doctor swept my membranes and was convinced she would be seeing me that night or the next day. She was wrong, lol. I had did have contractions everyday after that for 4-6 hours at a time. After 5 days of this I was getting pretty frustrated. Not knowing if this was it or not was beg... Sun, 15 Apr 2012 13:14:14 EST 9 months pregnant , almost there and Belly pics! So I have a little less than 3 weeks until my EDD of April 6th! I personally think my due date is April 12th but at this point I've switched to my docs EDD because its closer <em>30</em> . My mom will be here in 13 days and after that he is welcome to come anytime! Im am so ready to not be pregnant anymore. <BR> <BR> Im still gaining 1lb+ a week which sucks. I cant count the weight from my last appt. because it was at 1:30p and my usual appt. is in the morning. But im thinking it would have... Sat, 17 Mar 2012 08:29:00 EST Less than 50 days to go! Another month has gone by and I am that much closer to meeting my son and getting my exercise on!! I managed to only gain 3lbs ove the past 4 weeks so im pretty happy about that. Im actually getting pretty bored with food. Nothing ever sounds good anymore. I think I ate so much in the beginning that im just tired of all the junk. Which hopefully will help after im able to get my weight loss journey back on track. <BR> <BR> I kept up with my goal of light exercise and weights although I slack... Sat, 25 Feb 2012 10:57:14 EST Reflections that probably only make sense to me My oh my how fast the months add up. Needless to say this pregnancy is not going how I thought it would. But i've had many months to figure out why. However its a little late to fix what I screwed up in the first trimester. <BR> <BR> I know that the one big mistake was not easing into maintenance mode. Maintenance is a very very hard thing and I was NOT prepared for it in any way. Which led to me turning to junk food to fill the extra calories. Which in turn caused me to gain way too much w... Mon, 23 Jan 2012 09:24:39 EST the things i do to hide my weight gain i had to laugh at myself several times yesterday for my absurdity, lol. It was my monthly ob appointment. Last month I gained 6lbs and this month I really wanted to maintain. I managed to do so up until the week before my stupid appointment. So I came up with a clever solution to hide my little gain. <BR> <BR> When I weighed last month I wore jeans and tennis shoes which each weigh 1.5lbs adding 3lbs to my actual weight. So this time I opted for my crocs and the lightest clothing I own. I a... Thu, 17 Nov 2011 08:20:09 EST Almost halfway to baby I absolutely cant believe that thanksgiving is in 2 weeks. The holidays have come really quickly this year. Im not complaining though because i can not wait for all the yummy food!! Turkey, mashed potatoes and corn , exactly what im craving and I finally get to have it soon. <BR> <BR> In one week I will be 5 months along and halfway to meeting our little one. We had our sonogram last week and found out we are having a BOY! My husband was pretty disappointed because he wanted another girl bu... Mon, 14 Nov 2011 09:13:35 EST October update Well In June I managed to get down to my lowest of 157 and it all went down hill from there. I gained a little over the month maintaining 165 or less. Then I found out my mom was moving to Georgia and the stress bug made me do awful things. I gained a little more. Then The end of of July we found out I was pregnant and expecting our 2nd child. And although I was excited that it only took us 1 try to accomplish something that would have taken years when I weighed 290lbs I lost my way with my h... Tue, 4 Oct 2011 08:58:15 EST Pregnant after significant weight loss, how do I do this?!?! I literally do not know where to begin. I guess I will start with that I found out last week we are expecting baby #2 in April . We were planning to start trying in September anyway so although this was an oopsy we are happy. Now you may be asking where is the problem in that? <BR> <BR> Here is the problem. I have gained 15lbs over the past month! 15lbs!!! Im bursting in tears right now just thinking about it. I am so disappointed in myself. I just can't seem to find any balance and my weigh... Sat, 6 Aug 2011 22:04:19 EST Give me a S-T-R-E-S-S ! (pic heavy) Apparently somewhere along the way I gave up. The month of june has been a complete waste of time for me. Between stress and lack of caring I gained pretty much 10lbs in my book. Its more like 8lbs but I figure had I stayed on track I would have lost so im counting a few of those pounds. Had I stayed on track I would have been at goal in 2 weeks from now. Where do I even begin to tell you about this month. <BR> <BR> I think it all started with being late for my period. I have NEVER missed a ... Sat, 2 Jul 2011 10:19:24 EST Letting the scale dictate my life Yet another blog of new beginnings. However this one is different. This one is about how i'm deciding to start losing weight again. For the past month I haven't lost anything. A whole month of binges and basically exercising so I can eat more. And I have come to the conclusion that I am at the point where I let the scale dictate my life. <BR> <BR> From the very beginning of my journey I weighed every day if not several times a day. But I never saw this as a problem because I used the scale a... Wed, 15 Jun 2011 10:31:03 EST Incentive this week For the past 2 weeks i have pretty much just maintained my weight. Even though I had a ton of activity this week and should have actually lost at my weigh in today I didnt really. Why may you ask because my diet has consisted of raisins, animal crackers, homemade cinnamon rolls and chocolate ice cream. In fact for 3 days straight the only fruit or vegetable I consumed were raisins and lots of them. I think that I managed to maintain and not gain a ton this week because even though my food cho... Sun, 5 Jun 2011 09:00:26 EST I ran outside in a sports bra! Ok so yes everyone in the world could view my spark page and see me in my undies, but for someone to see me in a sports bra in person is a different story. Its finally starting to hit the 90's here this week. And when I run I sweat A LOT. So I waited until dark to avoid the heat and thought what the heck I'm going to run in just my sports bra. It was GREAT! I was so much cooler. I remember thinking a year ago that I couldnt wait until I felt comfortable enough to run in one. And I am finally ... Sat, 4 Jun 2011 11:28:42 EST boob job, cute panties, clothes, clothes and more clothes!! I have turned into such a shopaholic its crazy! I am able to control myself and not buy everything I like however. And it has to be on clearance for me to even think of buying it which is a plus. <BR> I discovered a few new stores while at the mall this past week. Vanity and wet seal are two of my new discoveries. Wet seal had THE cutest panties! So I bought 8 new pair. Honestly underwear is something that I was lacking. I think I had 2 pair left that actually fit me and even those were star... Wed, 25 May 2011 11:00:08 EST Spark motivator of the day?!? Im a little confused but excited. I woke up this morning to an inbox full of spark page comments congratulating me on being spark motivator of the day. I'm honored, thrilled and grateful for all the wonderful comments i'm reading! <BR> <BR> And im a little confused, lol. So being spark motivator of the day means that im featured in the daily spark emails right? Im not complaining but I kind of wish sparkpeople would have clued me in with a personal email or something. Or do they not do that... Thu, 19 May 2011 11:18:14 EST 130lbs lost and a healthy bmi !! So this morning I was excited about weigh in because I knew I was going to finally break into the 150's. I didn't realize what else it would mean until my lovely scale shared the news with me. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I officially have a bmi of 24.9. This means I am now considered the high end of a healthy weight!! Ok so technically 159.2 not 159.4 is what results in a bmi of 24.9. But the scale kept flipping between the two nu... Tue, 17 May 2011 10:23:19 EST The grass isn't always greener on the skinnier side I've been wanting to write this blog for several days now and just haven't found the time to do so. Before I share some of my thoughts I wanted to say that I have absolutely no regrets of making the decision to lose weight. I just wanted to share a few of the things I have noticed, since crossing over to the greener side, that when I was heavier would have never thought would be an issue after losing weight. <BR> <BR> My top 5 greener grass woes <BR> <BR> 1. Today its 55 out after several... Sat, 14 May 2011 15:50:03 EST A fluke but I just had to share. While I was out yesterday I decided to try on some size 6's just for the heck of it to see how far I had to go. I picked up 2 pair one denim the other khaki. I was shocked when I was able to actually button the Khaki's! I couldn't even button the jean capris, but they were actually a juniors size 7. So I figure I am a good solid 8 now. All of the 8's that I have fit comfortably and by the end of the day even require a belt. <BR> <BR> I actually had a great food day yesterday. And it looked ... Fri, 13 May 2011 23:30:59 EST Reflections I kind of gave up on my daily photo blogs. I do good somedays to track all my other stuff. A daily blog just isnt in the cards for me. So here is a long one because its been about a week since my last. <BR> <BR> Things have been going well the past couple weeks. Its been a little rocky at times with a few days of bad food choices. But I stopped it at one day and worked the rest of the week to do better. I'm back down to my lowest this morning of 161.8. Im happy about that. A little worried t... Tue, 10 May 2011 00:00:26 EST Excellent week, lets rinse and repeat! A week of period and DOMS water retentention, then a week to work that off, then a week of being sick and eating way too much junk and now a week of very clean eating. What a month with a ton of ups and downs. Last week I gained 2lbs this week I dropped 7.6lbs! I was astonished. So I decided to make a blog for myself to reference what I did this week that I most definitely will want to repeat over and over again <em>334</em> . <BR> <BR> * eat within 30 mins of waking up <BR> <BR> * no more ... Sun, 24 Apr 2011 18:22:11 EST 30 day photo blog day 8 Day 08 - A picture of your favorite color <BR> <BR> I would have to say that my favorite color is purple. I wear a lot of purple. So here it is my favorite shade of purple. <BR> <img src=""> <BR> Sat, 23 Apr 2011 18:06:09 EST 30 day photo blog day 7 Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item <BR> <BR> Well of course my most treasured thing is my family. I dont form attachments to things really even though I have a lot of stuff. I guess my most treasured item would have to be my camera. I love to take pictures of my daughter. When she was first born I took 20 pics every single day. I literally could have 365 days of Hannah. Its slowed down as she has gotten older. I'm sure my hard drive appreciates it. I think we have close to I dont... Thu, 21 Apr 2011 11:08:24 EST Updated with pic finally 30 day photo blog day 6 Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day <BR> <BR> Thats a hard one. Because even though at times we may wish to be someone else we all know that the grass isnt always greener on the other side. If I had been asked this when I first started my journey I would have posted a virtual picture of my ideal weight. But now that im getting close to the person I want to be its hard to imagine who I would ever what to trade places with for a day. <BR> <BR> Let me thi... Tue, 19 Apr 2011 20:25:57 EST A little surprise in my mailbox I've really enjoyed spark peoples new weekend giveaways. Every weekend I have entered hoping to win. Today I got my mail and found a little surprise. Apparently I won the giveaway for the yoga for small spaces card set! I assumed that if I were to win something I would receive an email stating so. I didn't receive anything but I don't mind because the surprise brightened my day! <BR> <BR> On another note, this week has gone really well. Even though I haven't been able to exert my normal ener... Tue, 19 Apr 2011 18:53:46 EST 30 day photo blog day 5 Day 05 - A picture of your favorite animal <BR> <BR> I missed yesterday so im just picking up where I left off today. <BR> Does an insect count as an animal ? Well its my blog and I say it does, lol. So my favorite would have to be a butterfly. As im sure that many of us favor butterflies on spark people. Their universal symbolism for change , transformation, new beginnings and their beauty appeal to us all. <BR> <BR> Such an awesome photo. <BR> <img src=" Mon, 18 Apr 2011 23:08:35 EST 30 day photo blog day 4 Day 04 - A picture of the cast of your favorite TV show <BR> <BR> well this is a hard one. A lot of our free time is spent watching tv and movies. Horrible i know but we have no friends so its all we have for enjoyment. I'm going to post 2 pictures for this one. A pic of a current tv show and a pic of a show that i wish was still on. <BR> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> Big bang theory has got to be our favorite comedy on right now. We ha... Sat, 16 Apr 2011 23:53:51 EST 30 day photo blog day 3 Day 03 - A picture of your inspiration for weight loss <BR> <BR> My inspiration for weight loss would have to be my daughter Hannah. Growing up there was always one thing that seemed to be a constant in my life, being overweight. I wish that my mother had gotten more involved in not only mine but her health as well. Food was always a focus and in the wrong way. I remember her letting me eat margarine straight out of the tub! For heavens sake who does that? <BR> I always found my weight t... Fri, 15 Apr 2011 15:01:01 EST 30 day photo blog day 2 Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest <BR> <BR> I would like to say it was my mother but it isn't. The person I have been closest with the longest would be my husband Jason. We met in December of 2003 and have been together for almost 7 1/2 years now. He is the only person in the world that I feel like I could share every single part of myself with. We spend practically every waking moment together. And although I would really like to have other fri... Thu, 14 Apr 2011 09:43:28 EST 30 day picture blog day 1 Thought I would jump on the picture blog bandwagon. Not to mention beef up my spark points with a daily blog. <BR> Day 1 - A recent picture of myself. This photo was taken tonight after an evening walk with the family. I need to find a faster walking partner, lol. I ran mile 1 then picked everyone up for mile 2. The dog and I ran down and then back up to meet Jason and the stroller every once in awhile. Even when I was heavy I was a fast walker. I always leave every one in the dust. Hannah k... Wed, 13 Apr 2011 23:21:40 EST Goal achieved for this week! After gaining 5.4lbs in water weight last week I set a goal to lose it all and return to my 178.6lb weight for the previous week. Well I DID IT!! Not only that but I lost an additional .8lbs for the week. Total scale loss was 6.2lbs, which definitely confirms to me that it was water weight. <BR> <BR> This was a really good week for me. I was a little bummed with such a daunting goal ahead of me, but I kicked its butt! And after looking back I realized I ran 5 times this week for a total of ... Sun, 10 Apr 2011 09:59:15 EST Happy birthday to me!! <img src=""> <BR> Ok so my birthday isnt actually until sunday. DH and I chose to have a day out today because the weekends are just way to crowded at the places we were wanting to go. We dropped Hannah off at my moms fairly tear free. I have been so stressed lately because we are experience some severe separation anxiety. Hannah refuses to be left at our gym child center, with my mom and even freaks out when I go upstairs without her. Fo... Fri, 8 Apr 2011 22:37:16 EST (pics included) Honesty and What I aspire to be So honestly Last week I gained 5.4lb putting me at 174lbs on Sunday morning. I gained steadily the entire week. I admit I let it depress me and only added to the gain with a few high calorie days. I knew that part of the gain was from pre period bloat. And I dont know about anyone else but as I get smaller I find that I bloat a heck of a lot more. I practically looked like i was 4 months pregnant. <BR> And as Thursday approached I found myself to be stumped. I was exercising, staying in my c... Tue, 5 Apr 2011 11:49:54 EST 120 lbs lost and a first for me! Well this day finally came! The day I saw 169.4 on that silly scale. I am finally out of the 170's for good!! It took me 4 months to travel through the 170's with lots of up and downs. It was actually inspiration from a fellow sparker that finally lit the fire under my butt To break through to the 160's. <BR> I have been following skinnymisskasey for awhile now. And if your reading this I hope you dont mind that I am mentioning you as my inspiration. We both have been neck and neck in our we... Wed, 23 Mar 2011 16:29:18 EST If found please return... my boobs! I think one of the hardest parts about losing weight has been losing my chest. Yes I know im healthier now, but after all my hard work you think I would have been left with a little more up top! At some point I hope that I will be able to afford cosmetic surgery. If i'm brave enough to go through with it that is. I want a lift and an implant. You know I could even deal with my smaller cup size if not for all the lose skin that has come with it. Im not sure if anyone else there is d... Sun, 27 Feb 2011 10:08:04 EST Back on track and feeling fine! This time I really am staying on track. I have had 4 days, count them 4, of good eating in a row. Ok so 4 may not seem like a lot, but to me thats a life time. I've survived 2 non gym days and managed to get some form of extra activity done on those days. I lost 5.2lbs this week. Which is a lot. But thats after coming off of a week of binging and no exercise. <BR> I am excited about continuing my streak this week and working towards my next 5lb mini goal. <BR> My picture of inspiration for ... Sun, 20 Feb 2011 09:38:22 EST Strength Today I feel strong. I have had 2 days of good eating and 2 days of kicking butt at the gym. Today i am going to let my body rest . I still plan on getting some kind of extra activity in though. And I am ready to make turn this into a 3 day streak. <BR> Over the past 3 months I dont know how many times I said I was ready to start over again fresh because of failure. This time its different , this time i'm going to go all the way. Spring is in the air and I have the itch for change. <BR> may ... Fri, 18 Feb 2011 09:53:57 EST Small goals So march 1, my year anniversary, is approaching fast. I thought I would be at goal by now. I'm not really complaining because I did lose 110lbs which is a lot. I am disappointed in my self for not trying harder these past 3 months. I guess it got too hard and I simply gave up. I've been in denial for some time now. Just because I still keep up with exercise doesn't mean I can eat whatever I want. One of the whole reasons for doing this was to be healthier. I have done nothing but eat pure su... Wed, 16 Feb 2011 09:52:20 EST My journey thus far in pictures I made this slide show for me. To remind me of where I came from and to inspire me to continue to go further. <BR> On days that I slip up and feel like throwing in my towel, I will look to this to keep me going. When I start to criticize my body, my loose skin, bread dough belly , shrinking and lets face it sagging chest I will remember. Even if I never shed another pound I NEVER EVER EVER want to return to what I was. I only want to be what I have become and even better what I have yet to ... Tue, 25 Jan 2011 22:44:46 EST I surrender Im waiving my white flag at december, I surrender , you win. I have lost a total of 2.6 so far this month. Its taken me 3 weeks to lose what I use to lose in a week. Weight loss use to be something I concentrated on to help me forget about life problems. This month life has put its foot in that door and will not let me shut it out. So december I give to you life, just dont leave me too bruised after battle. I'd still like to be walking come the new year. <BR> <BR> I'm going to try and start... Fri, 17 Dec 2010 09:54:53 EST The difference of a year We took our christmas pictures yesterday. It was so nice to only have to retake shots because my daughter wasn't smiling and not because I hated the way I looked. NO huge double chin this year. Only a small double chin this year because I couldn't get my mom to hold the camera high enough. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Christmas 2009 <BR> <img src="">Christmas 2010 <BR> <BR> I still have ... Tue, 14 Dec 2010 09:34:57 EST Body shots in pics In a previous blog I asked if these photos would offend. Everyone who commented said they would NOT be offended . And so here they are, me underneath it all. <BR> I also posted a blog with a slide show because I think its neat to see a before photo fade into an after. Now im going to post the actual pictures with weights and dates. <BR> <BR> March 29 272lbs 15.4lost~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Nov. 30 180.4 109lbs lost <BR> <img src=""> <img... Tue, 30 Nov 2010 16:38:53 EST Underneath it all, body shots of my progress Its not the best. The before shots aren't even from the beginning, but they are as far back as I took of certain angles. If I have time i'll mess with it and hopefully make it into something better. <BR> Tue, 30 Nov 2010 16:22:24 EST Trying to find Balance Everyone has always said that its harder to eat right and lose weight when you travel and are away from home. I have discovered that is not so in my case. <BR> I had 2 trips this month. One for 2 days to my DH's grandparents and then a very long road trip to Ohio for Thanksgiving and to see my new nephew. 2 days of 15hrs of driving and 2 days of family. I struggle all the time to control my snacking at home and I exercised almost everyday this month excluding my trips. I lost more weight on ... Tue, 30 Nov 2010 10:22:13 EST