Standing in Hope!

Wed, 2 Jan 2013 23:01:38 EST

Today I changed my profile image. I chose another butterfly picture. 88 Butterflies are beautiful, and beauty is always uplifting for me. Usually when I am looking for something beautiful, the first images to catch my eye are things breathtakingly majestic - mountains, oceans, sunsets, etc.

Some of the things that are planned will be very enjoyable, but at the end of this long day, I am rather discouraged by how much is still on the agenda...

Time to create some positive momentum!

Sat, 10 Nov 2012 18:02:02 EST

We are 10 days into November (1/3 of the month over already!) and I have spent most of it stressed and feeling crummy! It is not a good place to be. Today is better, but that may be a reflection of not having to go into work! 211 I have plenty of positive thinking exercises that I can manage to pull myself together enough to do in the morning, but lately by the end of the day I am just wiped out and tired of the ins and outs of daily life. I have been slacking on exercise and...

Virtual 5K completed!

Fri, 2 Nov 2012 15:02:25 EST

This morning I completed the Trick-or-Treat Trot Virtual 5K race. I used the odometer on my car to map out the route and my lovely Timex watch to measure my time - 48 minutes! 244 That is no where near the fastest times posted, but it is certainly much better than I could have done 2 months ago!! 334

When I signed up originally I had planned to do a walk/run but in the course of the "training" for the race, I realized that I can't walk/jog as fast as I ...

November goals!

Thu, 1 Nov 2012 22:44:22 EST

Let me start by saying that I have a crazy month ahead of me, so my goals needed be adjusted to fit the situation:

1. To weigh 224 by November 30, 2012
This would be an 8 pound weight loss for the month, my current best for a month is 5 so this is a stretch, but I would rather stretch and not quite make it than aim lower... that said, in August I had hoped to be 220 by the end of November, so I am feeling behind as it is. If I can manage lose 12 lb this month and meet tha...

October Goals Progress - Week 4

Mon, 29 Oct 2012 18:37:55 EST

1. To weigh 229 by October 31.
Weighed in today at 232 -1 lb change this week, for the month 4 lb down, in 29 days, can't imagine I will shed 3 lb in 2 days, so I will offer my concession speech now: "230's you have had me in your strong-hold for 2 months now, and accept that I will start November under your thumb, but I promise that you will not keep me there long!! I am ready to say good-bye to you, and it will not be long now! Enjoy the last few days ruling over my scale, because th...

October Goals Progress - Week 3

Mon, 22 Oct 2012 20:17:22 EST

Not the most exciting title in the world, but it fits this blog!
Now on to my progress to date:

1. To weigh 229 by October 31.
Weighed in today at 333 -2 lb change this week, for the month 3 lb down, 4 to go.... It is probably unlikely that I will lose 4 lbs in 9 days, considering 3 lbs took 22, but that won't stop me from trying 211

2. To walk/jog a total of at least 18 miles each week.
Close but not quite... I did 16/18 for this week. I...

October Goals - week 2 progress report!

Mon, 15 Oct 2012 18:32:33 EST

1. To weigh 229 by October 31.
Weighed in today at 335 same as last week 0 lb change this week, for the month still - 1 lb down, 6 to go....

2. To walk/jog a total of at least 18 miles each week. 248

3. To do 30 squats, bicycle crunches and push-ups daily. 248

4. 100% attendance to SparkPeople for the month of October. Logged in every day, but forgot to spin the wheel yesterday 2

And to give a Spark...

Freaky Friday

Fri, 12 Oct 2012 09:17:08 EST

This morning I decided to go into my office a bit early to tackle the mess on my desk - I am determined to have my desk cleared again before the weekend. I live close to the office and walk to work every morning.

Today, it feels like Halloween! The sky was mostly overcast - the sun wasn't quite rising yet so there was a spooky, gray aura all around. The wind was blowing the fallen leaves all around. And to make the picture complete, there was a murder of crows flying about sq...

October Goals - week 1 progress report!

Mon, 8 Oct 2012 18:26:37 EST

1. To weigh 229 by October 31.
Weighed in today at 335 - 1 lb down, 6 to go....

2. To walk/jog a total of at least 18 miles each week. 248

3. To do 30 squats, bicycle crunches and push-ups daily.
Accomplished 5/7 days.

4. 100% attendance to SparkPeople for the month of October. 248
And to give a SparkGoodie, with a positive message, to someone outside of my circle of SparkFriends at least once each week. 248

October goals

Mon, 1 Oct 2012 10:32:40 EST
After evaluating my September goals and my varied successes at meeting them, here are the goals that I have set for October:

1. To weigh 229 by October 31. (This would be a 7 pound weight loss for the month, I lost 5 in Sept. and 4 each in Aug. and Jul., so this goal is pushing me beyond what I have accomplished in the past, but push I will!!)

2. To walk/jog a total of at least 18 miles each week. (This is three miles more than my weekly goal for Sept. and I have deci...

Sept. Goals Progress Report - week 4

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 17:55:45 EST
1. To weigh 230 by Oct. 3
I think that I am going to have to officially call this goal a lost cause - I weighed in today at 236. It is a 1 pound loss from last week and a total of 5 pounds for September. 5 pounds lost is definitely a good achievement, but I will still strive for more in October.

2. To walk at least 6 miles outside each week, and at least 9 with the WATP videos, for at least 15 miles total each week.
248 I walked 8+ outside and 10 with the ...

Embracing today!

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 10:39:34 EST
"He has made everything appropriate to its time,
and has put the timeless into their hearts..."

The reading I used for my morning meditation today is from the Book of Ecclesiates. (Think of the Byrds song "Turn! Turn! Turn!) The words fit very well with what was in my mind and heart when I resolved to embrace today recognizing all of the beauty, goodness and joy that is a part of my life today.

Experiences of Beauty, Joy and Goodness are timeless - they touch our...

Deep thoughts - well, deep enough for a Thursday evening : )

Thu, 27 Sep 2012 22:25:45 EST
Today my work-life has slowed down from fever-pitched insanity 46 259 back to its "normal" crazy boil! 198 There may be a bit of exaggeration in that last sentence but not too much!! 211 I work in an office that is always busy, and my days are generally peppered with changes to my agenda for the day. Most of the time that is really okay with me. Right now, I am just sick of it all. 234 I am working hard to overcome this dread of...

Sept. Progress Report - week 3

Fri, 21 Sep 2012 17:50:06 EST
1. To weigh 230 by Oct. 3
Weighed in on Wednesday at 237 - not looking terribly promising to meet that goal of 230, but I will keep striving.

2. To walk at least 6 miles outside each week, and at least 9 with the WATP videos, for at least 15 miles total each week.
Goal not quite met - I walked 9 miles outside and 7 with the videos, so still exceeded total mileage for the week, but didn't get quite as intense calorie burn.

3. To do at least 10 minutes of cardi...

Today's NSV

Wed, 19 Sep 2012 21:34:52 EST
This afternoon in my office building there was a minor emergency - and elderly woman took a serious fall (she is sore but otherwise okay) and I was able to be the one to run for help -- yes RUN!! It wasn't a long run in either direction, but I ran!! 312 363 Between the adrenaline and the new-found energy I have from exercising regularly, I was able to OUTRUN the help I found, that is definitely a first for me!! 211

That was just one event in a ...

Reweighed this morning

Sat, 15 Sep 2012 09:49:41 EST
This morning the scale said 238 - 2 lbs lost... not as nice as what I saw yesterday, but I think this is real loss, so I am still happy about it!!

Looking forward to a great weekend - hope you all have one too!!!
30

Sept. Progress Report - week 2

Fri, 14 Sep 2012 16:05:19 EST
1. To weigh 230 by Oct. 3
Weighed in at 236 this morning but I think I was completely dehydrated , so I am not confident that I have real weight loss here (I didn't update my tracker for this reason...)

2. To walk at least 6 miles outside each week, and at least 9 with the WATP videos, for at least 15 miles total each week.
248 Walked 7 miles outside and 10 with the WATP videos for a total of 17

3. To do at least 10 minutes of cardio and 10 minu...

252 Let me count the ways....

Wed, 12 Sep 2012 14:54:57 EST
252 because here I can be a 321 - offering encourgement 215 .

252 because my 223 s are here to remind me to 386 because 381 .

252 because it is full of 189 to keep me motivated and 208 when 248 .

252 because ...

Okay I have lost patience with the cutesy emoticons, but what I want to say is that I love SP! I sta...

Today's NSV

Mon, 10 Sep 2012 16:41:53 EST
One of the conference tables in our office has some strange chairs. The legs extend straight up above the seat and then turn outward for a few inches and then make another turn to form the arms of the chair. The result is that there is plenty of room in the chairs for big hips, but not for big thighs. Normally when I sit in these chairs, I need to sit all the way back so that my legs can fit snugly (not comfortably!). I am short, so sitting all the way back leaves just my toes touching the...

Another BEAUTIFUL day!!

Sun, 9 Sep 2012 21:38:43 EST
Enjoyed long walks two days in a row!! 2 hours yesterday, one hour today (but a quicker pace and a hilly route!)

It was great to be able to enjoy the nice weather -- It is even worth the sunburn and bug bites to show as evidence of my excursions!!

Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend!!

Sept. week 1 recap

Fri, 7 Sep 2012 22:24:37 EST
A recap of my Sept goals:

1. To weigh 230 by Oct. 3 (I am doing Wed. weigh-ins, but I did not get a very accurate weigh-in this week due to bloating, etc. so if this ends up being more than the ~9 lb that I expect, I may modify this by adding an extra week.)
*** it is 10 lb to go, but I am going to stick with the original goal date here...

2. To walk at least 6 miles outside each week, and at least 9 with the WATP videos, for at least 15 miles total each week.

Stop grinning at me!

Thu, 6 Sep 2012 22:55:32 EST
The day started off fine. I woke up, exercised, and I was feeling great! But then I went over to the scale. I was very optimistic about the weigh in this morning because yesterday the skirt I was wearing fit so nicely - I hadn't put it on since the spring, and it definitely didn't feel like it fit this well then!! After feeling smaller yesterday, I had high hope for finally seeing a 23_ number, but no, the crazy scale said 240! Actually I am quite confident that the scale was laughing at m...

I am not the Trash Can

Wed, 5 Sep 2012 21:42:29 EST
I did it!! I managed to leave food on my plate and walk away peacefully!!

At my lunch meeting today, I ate most of the salad, all of the Brussels sprouts (about the only veggie that I don't love) and left more than half of the beef strogonoff and noodles! My first thought when the plate was put in front of me was that the presentation left something to be desired - it was a drab and colorless plate and didn't look at all attractive to me! The fact that it didn't look good to me ...

Redefining Waste

Tue, 4 Sep 2012 22:44:48 EST
I am one of those people who has been trained since birth to finish everything on my plate. By nature and by nurture I am a frugal person, I don't like wasting anything - food, water, electricity, energy, time. . .

As a person who has a job that includes luncheon meetings (where the meals are provided and pre-plated) it is a challenge for me to balance my desire to eat healthy with my desire to not be wasteful of what has been given to me. I have one of these luncheon meetings...

Better than Yesterday!

Sun, 2 Sep 2012 10:03:52 EST
Day 1 of September ended on a better note than it began! I made it to bed early last night and so far today has been a much better. I woke up on time, turned on the coffee and exercised for twenty minutes to start off the day!

244 to fresh starts!!

After Church today, I plan on seriously attacking my closets - organized closets always make me feel much better about being in control of my life!! 211

Not such a great start... but I will turn it around!!

Sat, 1 Sep 2012 16:34:19 EST
Yesterday I was very excited to start September on the personal level - new goals, a fresh slate, etc. Unfortunately, some worries took hold of my mind last night and i had trouble sleeping. This morning I had a committee meeting for a picnic that we (the organization I work for) have planned for Labor Day, and before I even realized it, I had eaten 2 doughnuts! In my semi-comatose state, I am off to clean the house, and then fix myself a good supper and then head to bed!! I am not going ...

September Goals

Fri, 31 Aug 2012 22:31:11 EST
Putting the goals in writing will give me more motivation to succeed at meeting them, right? At least that is the plan - it will certainly be better than the vague goals that I had in my head for August to "do better" at everything...

1. To weigh 230 by Oct. 3 (I am doing Wed. weigh-ins, but I did not get a very accurate weigh-in this week due to bloating, etc. so if this ends up being more than the ~9 lb that I expect, I may modify this by adding an extra week.)

2. To ...

What to do when you are a guest for dinner??

Thu, 30 Aug 2012 11:11:36 EST
A neighbor invited me over for dinner last night. She is 80+ and still fit and active and living alone. We eat together a few times a month, and she knows that I am trying to eat lighter suppers these days.

The invitation went something like this:
"Deary, it is about time you come for supper again. I just made up a fresh batch of homemade apple sauce, so I can just throw some sandwiches together and we'll have apple sauce for dessert. How does that sound?"

I t...

A little growth in Self-Knowledge (Probably TMI for the men in the audience. . .)

Wed, 29 Aug 2012 15:02:40 EST
Yesterday evening my body revealed to me why it was so suddenly feeling depleted of energy. *That* time of the month had arrived and taken my motivation hostage. Pushing myself to do some exercise yesterday helped to restore both my energy and my mood.

This morning I felt all bloated, cramped, tired and cranky... then I weighed myself and I am +1 from last week. I remember from my first go at this regular weigh-in business a few years ago that I skipped the weigh-ins around th...

Fat = Potential Energy to burn!!

Tue, 28 Aug 2012 18:27:50 EST
This morning I commented on a SparkFriend's feed: "If you just do it, even if you don't feel like it, you may discover energy you didn't know that you had!!" As luck would have it, this afternoon, I didn't feel like exercising... at all, motivation = 0, no energy, not even a little bit of desire to move!!

If I am willing to give advice, I ought to follow it, right? If you think about it, I have 200,000+ calories stored up in the fat cells throughout my body - what is that but P...

The results of the Great Cookie Test are in!

Mon, 27 Aug 2012 21:38:14 EST
The cookies were a hit all around! They tasted great, if I do say so myself, and were well received by everyone in the office - especially the birthday girl 179 107 I managed to bake them without tasting the dough and refrained from eating any more than the portion I allotted to myself -- it helps that I had them all packaged up and labeled with each person's name as soon as they were cool enough! 211

What I hadn't planned on was the DQ Ice Cream c...

Planning for my next temptation. . .

Sun, 26 Aug 2012 10:58:43 EST
Tomorrow one of my co-workers is celebrating her birthday. She has worked in my office for 4 years now and it has become sort of a tradition that I bake chocolate chip cookies for her birthday. 495 She absolutely loves them, and she is a super healthy sort of person, so I am not feeding into an unhealthy habit of hers by doing this. I really don't want my decision to try to fight my weight problem to get in the way of the treats that I give others, but how will I do this afternoo...

A WooHoo for me!

Sat, 25 Aug 2012 18:06:39 EST
Another little food victory for me: 30

I have some "snack size" mini Keebler Fudge Stripe cookies - very high up on my list of favorite junk foods!! It has been a very good week for me - emotionally, physically, etc. and so I thought that I could indulge myself with a couple of the mini cookies - not the whole bag!

I went to the cupboard to open a bag armed with a clip to close it and keep the cookies left in the bag fresh. I opened up the bag, took out...

Hitching my wagon to a star : )

Fri, 24 Aug 2012 11:14:18 EST
Found this on my desk this morning :
"Take Time"
Take time to work -
It is the price of success.
Take time to think -
It is the source of power.
Take time to play -
It is the secret of perpetual youth.
Take time to be friendly - (This sentence is circled, with a "TY")
It is the road to happiness.
Take time to dream -
It is hitching your wagon to a star. (love this line!)
Take time to love and be love -
It is a God-given pri...

An amazing discovery . . .

Thu, 23 Aug 2012 14:27:32 EST
I love zucchini! I picked up some fresh zucchini from a farm stand because it seemed like the *right* thing to do. I like most vegetables, but I had never prepare fresh zucchini before. I like it well enough as part of a frozen vegetable mix, but I didn't expect to enjoy it this much. Now I have fixed it roasted with some "Mrs. Dash" and a touch of Parmesan cheese! Yummy!! and I have simmered some with fresh tomatoes - also a treat!

Now if only I can find myself a fruit to ...

Wisdom from my Peanuts Calendar

Wed, 22 Aug 2012 15:18:17 EST
Today's Comic Strip:

[Snoopy's thoughts in case you can't read them: frame 1 "That little bug lives in a world all his own. . ." frame 2 "He doesn't know anything about atmospheric testing, strikes, farm problems, medical care, education or income tax. . ." frame 3 "All he has to worry about is eating and getting stepped on." frame 4 "That's the secret . . . reduce your worries to a minimum."]

Today...

Happy Tuesday : )

Tue, 21 Aug 2012 22:24:10 EST
Today started with a small victory - I hit the snooze button but still managed to get myself out of bed before the alarm went off the second time. I have gotten into the bad habit of hitting the snooze 2-3 times, so this was definitely a noteworthy accomplishment for me today.

For a week now, I have been down to 2 cups of coffee-- also a victory in my book : )

Another positive - in the midst of a wild day, where no part of my day was as usually scheduled, I met my fi...

Finding the right place to focus - tomorrow will be better!

Mon, 20 Aug 2012 22:46:30 EST
After a good three weeks of staying within my calorie goals, I have gone over three times in the last week. A few days ago it was an over-abundance of yummy foods within arm's reach that tempted me beyond my powers to resist. That day was altogether good but exhausting , so I willingly allowed myself to splurge, knowing that I had been doing well and that I could start fresh again the next day. The unfortunate, though not unusual I suppose, side-effect of my splurging is that my food cravi...

Who do I think I am?

Sun, 19 Aug 2012 22:54:40 EST
My thoughts this evening are being directed by two articles that I have read in the last 24 hours.
The first SparkPeople featured article that I found on the start page, "Improve Your Self-Esteem with Journaling : Writing a Better You" www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellnes
s_articles.asp?id=237

The second is an article recommended by MPLANE37 in response to my blog yesterday "We are what we do"
www.psychologytoday.com/blog/redirec
t/201201...

Self perception - who is right??

Sat, 18 Aug 2012 22:20:52 EST
Is it possible that I am walking through life thinking that I am someone I am not?

An acquaintance of mine made a comment in passing about "people our size" and it has thrown me for a loop. Never in the entire history of our acquaintance have I thought of us as similar in size. And actually it isn't just size but she seems to think that we two are similar in countless ways that I just can't see.

The way I perceive her is larger in every way. We have a similar shape, a...

Worthy of the effort and the pain . . .

Fri, 17 Aug 2012 22:15:55 EST
Not to be deterred by lack of success yesterday, I tried another cardio workout video today. Still I feel like an uncoordinated fool trying to get my body to do what it is supposed to be doing when it is supposed to do it! Of course being obese with a life-long history of being challenged in the areas of both rhythm and hand-eye coordination does not help matters!

I finally did manage to get through the 11 minute chair cardio workout -- and at least there was no one there to see...

Three left feet?

Thu, 16 Aug 2012 15:00:44 EST
Yesterday was a long, exhausting day. I have a desk job, but yesterday I rarely sat down aside from my lunch break - and the office had a special catered lunch, so YUMMY, but I ate WAY too much!! (Did enjoy some fruit - but they were very decadent chocolate covered strawberries!) 4 It was such a busy day that I never had time for a coffee break in the morning or the afternoon - the plus side on that is that I didn't snack between meals (and there were lots of tempting goodies av...

Retraining my taste buds!

Tue, 14 Aug 2012 14:50:03 EST
My relationship with fruit is very ambivalent! I wish that I could say that I was a fruit lover, but alas I am not. There are times when I thoroughly enjoy a piece of fruit but I am not sure that I have every had a craving for fruit of any sort. (Tomatoes are the exception, but we generally call them veggies!)

Today I ate some tasty honeydew melon as my dessert with my lunch. While eating it, I was very conscious of the fact that it tasted "good" - it was ripened to perfectio...

Inspired by my Peanuts calendar for today:

Fri, 10 Aug 2012 14:18:42 EST
Snoopy is sitting on his dog house. The first frame shows a butterfly approaching, in the second frame the butterfly lands next to him, in the third frame the butterfly flutters off again. In the last frame with a smile Snoopy says, "My home is a haven for all sorts of weary travelers!"

For us weary travelers on the road of life, it is nice to have a place to stop and rejuvenate along the way! Sometimes it is rest that brings me back to life. I have great hope that someday ex...

Baby steps!!

Thu, 9 Aug 2012 14:53:08 EST
Technically, I have been a member of SparkPeople since Jan.2009. At that time I used the site, but had everything set to private and pretty much abhorred the idea of sharing this journey with anyone else, much less sharing it on-line for anyone to see! Using this site as a private motivator for a healthy lifestyle worked for a time, but for every step forward that I was able to make in 2009-2010, I have taken 2 back... I lost 25 pounds, and gained back 50... I gave up on exercise and portio...

My Better Self

Wed, 8 Aug 2012 09:29:29 EST
It feels like such a long time since I have seen "my better self." show her face! I think that she faded away slowly, caught up in the daily grind life.

My life is full in the sense that it is quite busy, but empty of many of the "better things" that at one time fed my soul. Ideally the better things in life have been given up for the Best, but at times I feel like the Best really need the lesser goods to show their true worth.

My commitments do not allow me to par...

KIWIANN's SparkPeople Blog

Are my arms getting longer?

Another Monday!

January 2013 Goals

Standing in Hope!

Time to create some positive momentum!

Virtual 5K completed!

November goals!

October Goals Progress - Week 4

October Goals Progress - Week 3

October Goals - week 2 progress report!

Freaky Friday

October Goals - week 1 progress report!

October goals

Sept. Goals Progress Report - week 4

Embracing today!

Deep thoughts - well, deep enough for a Thursday evening : )

Sept. Progress Report - week 3

Today's NSV

Reweighed this morning

Sept. Progress Report - week 2

252 Let me count the ways....

Today's NSV

Another BEAUTIFUL day!!

Sept. week 1 recap

Stop grinning at me!

I am not the Trash Can

Redefining Waste

Better than Yesterday!

Not such a great start... but I will turn it around!!

September Goals

What to do when you are a guest for dinner??

A little growth in Self-Knowledge (Probably TMI for the men in the audience. . .)

Fat = Potential Energy to burn!!

The results of the Great Cookie Test are in!

Planning for my next temptation. . .

A WooHoo for me!

Hitching my wagon to a star : )

An amazing discovery . . .

Wisdom from my Peanuts Calendar

Happy Tuesday : )

Finding the right place to focus - tomorrow will be better!

Who do I think I am?

Self perception - who is right??

Worthy of the effort and the pain . . .

Three left feet?

Retraining my taste buds!

Inspired by my Peanuts calendar for today:

Baby steps!!

My Better Self