KFH3107's SparkPeople Blog KFH3107's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Death of our youngest daughter With deepest cut in life I am now arranging the funeral of our youngest daughter (only 37 yrs old). Many of my Spark friends have read my blogs over the past year or two of the trials of my daughter and lent their support and encouragement. Unfortunately I (we) are once again in a state of denial, pain and shattering exhaustion. Will not be very active on the site for a while. only minimal contact. Thank you for understanding. <em>51</em> Wed, 2 Apr 2014 23:50:07 EST Cultural Difference in Palliative Impacts the Heart <em>51</em> My heart was recently broken once again when the loss of my most recent palliative patient impacted me in a way that I was not expecting. The cultural traditions of this patient and his family has left me with a healed heart although scarred with the memories of his passing and the passing of so many others before him. Many family members came from the U.S. as well as Canada all with a common goal in mind - to honor the last wishes of this man and to honor his tradition for th... Mon, 20 May 2013 22:43:36 EST Turning daily sorrow into a daily blessing! I've been thinking as we get closer and closer to Easter about how best to deal with my daily stress in Palliative Nursing. The conclusion I've come to is that I need to consciously think of what blessings I've received from my patients as they are held either in my arms or connected to my touch. After great consideration I've concluded that there has not been one palliative patient that has not left me with some blessing. A truly humbling experience when I think back to how many there ha... Mon, 25 Mar 2013 22:42:45 EST Vitamin F to be up to 30 years younger! Recently I was sent a terrific reminder about the vitamins we all need and should take. Below is one that I fee was very important and apparently has been reported to be high on the list of must takes/must haves according to Dr. Oz.............. Please read and don't be afraid to express your opinion about this - I welcome the opinions. <BR> <BR> WHY do I have a variety of friends who are all so different in Character? <BR> How is it possible I can get along with them all? <BR> I think each... Sat, 19 Jan 2013 21:45:45 EST Redefining the Road Ahead The Christmas and New Years temptations are now a thing of the past for another year. It is time for me to reevalutate and redefine what my plans are to stay on track through 2013. I thought that losing the weight was quite difficult; however, staying at my goal weight is harder than I could have imagined! <BR> <BR> I am going to take this month of January to check out what I can do to change up my exercise routines, extra curricular experiences and trying some of my shelved artistic endea... Fri, 4 Jan 2013 01:00:16 EST The greatest Act of Kindness During this month and many others where people have committed to doing random acts of kindness we need to remember the "Greatest and Best Act of Kindness". This is the gift of God to us - His Son Jesus. If we are to honor this gift we must be true to being kind just as Jesus was. This means, instead of just doing the occasional act of kindness we must be kind to everyone in spite of the treatment we receive. God is kind to everyone regardless of whether it is deserved or not. The best th... Sun, 2 Dec 2012 20:39:39 EST Family Change Equals a Name Change For all of my friends - just a quick blog to inform you that I've changed my contact name from kateanddraco to kfh3107 due to the sudden passing of draco. Hopefully everyone will stay in touch as usual and we can continue to support one another. I have always had the pleasure of awesome support from all of you. Thank you for your understanding . <img src=""> Sat, 24 Nov 2012 01:25:49 EST OOPS! Up 3 lbs from goal Well well! Imagine my shock when I stepped on the scale this morning and found I was up 3 lbs! I tried to blame the scale by re-weighing several times in several different locations in hope that it would show my usual weight! After lots of laughing and cajouling from my hubby I accepted the fact that my body has changed once again. He has convinced me that I've added more muscle to my body due to the sheer amount I've been on my feet. Work has been extra demanding for the past two weeks.... Tue, 20 Nov 2012 00:29:17 EST CHALLENGE: Random Acts of Kindness... Today I posted a message on one of my teams about this very thing and thought I would put the challenge out to others in the form of my Blog Page. It is this simple: Try each and every day to do some act of random kindness to someone else. It does not have to be someone you know. In fact doing this for a complete stranger has rewards that are even more of a blessing to you (ourselves) often than it does for the stranger. The possibilities are limitless. You could leave a financial gift ... Sun, 21 Oct 2012 20:40:48 EST Finding inspiration! I had a thought today which is probably not all that original BUT worth contemplating. My thought was this: Why do we not think of our own failures & accomplishment big and small a source of inspiration? Well, in attempt to answer this question I first had to search my own thoughts on where do I find inspiration and in what do I find inspiration? My mind naturally went to others who inspire me and things that others have attempted and/or accomplished as my usual source of inspiration. Af... Wed, 10 Oct 2012 00:39:51 EST The Butterfly Inside Us Finally I've emerged from tragic circumstances that caused much self- reflection. The result of this reflection has been a great deal of exercise for my "emotional core". In short - the self reflection has caused me to initially question every aspect of who I am as a person. It is wonderful to be able to say that the old saying "eventually all will be revealed" is true. Harsh road at times but ooooh so true. If there is one thing that I can pass on to each and every person who passes thr... Sat, 18 Aug 2012 01:42:06 EST Just Move On! Well folks - here I am once again facing a dilemma. Have you ever had someone you thought was a true friend betray your confidences and then tell you they don't want to be friends any longer??? Well this is one situation I never thought I would find myself in. It is a very bitter pill to swallow and adding any amount of sugar will not help I guarantee you! How did I deal with this you wonder? Well let me give you a quote I read, "Only God has the authority to judge and we are to judge onl... Mon, 23 Jul 2012 22:36:23 EST Out of the Fog into the Sunshine Just a quick blog to let all my friends and fellow sparkers I am so grateful for your support over the past 5 months. It has been a long journey to feel like living my daily life without my best friend. Her passing left a major void for everyone in my family. We are all finally able to do things in our daily lives that although they remind us of our dear friend we no longer fall into a state of dispair. I look forward to getting back into the groove of my spark life. Lets Spark on my fr... Tue, 17 Jul 2012 00:20:28 EST Absent in S park time but not in mind or heart! A quick note to let all of my spark friends know that I am still part of the teams but not yet in a state of healed grief that will allow me to do more than go to work and have an occasional check in on the site. I apologize for my absence and inactivity. My dearest friends passing has left me with the difficult task of healing myself mentally while my body goes through the motions of daily work. Not since the ordeal of my daughter's illness have I felt at such a loss of ability to help mys... Mon, 28 May 2012 22:18:30 EST Dragging/Bleeding Knuckles Done Now!!! Well friends - here I am finding almost all of January of the new year gone and a memory in the past. Amazing how work can make our lives such a blurrrr! This is not a good thing but being employed in such an unsettled economy certainly is. I often find myself thinking of those less fortunate than I and wishing I had a magic wand. <em>90</em> . Oh if only life was so easy right? <BR> <BR> Well folks today I heard a quote from an old school chum that sent shivers down my back. Her sayi... Sat, 28 Jan 2012 00:50:56 EST Old Saying Has Validity! My father use to tell us as small children that when you point your finger @ others you need to take a good look @ your what your hand is telling you. When you look @ your hand there may be a finger pointing @ someone else BUT there are 3 fingers pointing back @ you. The lesson that Dad was trying to teach us was that we should beware of pointing out the mistakes or shortcomings of others to them because doing this shows many more of these belong to us. <BR> <BR> Go ahead just try pointing... Sat, 26 Nov 2011 01:26:50 EST Gratitude A quick note to thank you so very much to all who have kept both my daughter and me in their prayers. The gratitude I feel for all of the support and prayers is beyond words. <BR> <BR> Thank you one and all and may each of you and all Spark members be especially blessed this Thanksgiving. You are all angels to me - <em>220</em> Mon, 21 Nov 2011 23:47:35 EST Take Time For 10 Things Just having returned fm latest medical crises for dtr and the end result is we are back on a prayerfully stable path. In taking time to read during our nightly watches I discovered this little list and thought it worth sharing. Sorry no author listed. <BR> <BR> 1. Take time to work: it is the price of success. <BR> 2. Take time to think: it is the source of power. <BR> 3. Take time to play: it is the secret of youth. <BR> 4. Take time to read: it is the foundation of knowledge. <BR> 5.... Sun, 6 Nov 2011 00:55:54 EST One Month of Holidays & ........ I am now officially on holiday now for 1 month and am eager to start my regeneration of my mind, body, spirit as well as reconnection to friends and family. Recently I had a close friend involved in a horrible motorcycle accident. Due to the fact that both my hubby and I are avid motorcycle enthusiasts we know just how devastating this was to our friend. He will be in ICU for a minimum of 6 months and has been in a coma since the day of the accident. We will be travelling to see our frien... Wed, 24 Aug 2011 00:52:29 EST Life is anything but boring!!! Well folks, it has been quite some time since I last blogged. My life has been chaotic, frenzied, wildly happy, progressingly healthier & virtually a roller coaster of a ride every day! Where does one start when every avenue of your life is up and down on an hour by hour basis? Suffice it to say that aside from dealing with health issues in our family (none mine except the stress it brings!), my life has not been boring! <BR> <BR> Since I last blogged I have had another grandson added to... Tue, 9 Aug 2011 00:56:39 EST Wt Maintenance - More difficult than I realized! Well folks - here I sit entering away on my lap top before calling it quits for the night. I've had the usual full day of work, exercise, home maintenace, favors for others etc. etc. etc........ <BR> While entering my stats for Sparkspeople I realized that I am now consumed more with the "not so easy" task of maintaining my new found goal weight than with the previous energy spent on losing those extra pounds! Am trying not to become tunnel visioned about this by spending time doing the sa... Fri, 15 Jul 2011 23:21:02 EST Goal Weight Now A Reality! I want to thank all of my Spark Friends and Teammates for helping me reach this special day. It has been a 2 yr and 8 month journey through many ups and downs both personally, physically and emotionally. The journey would have been much more difficult if it were not for all the support I have received from my Spark family. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Now starts the tough stage of this entire transition for me - that is maintaining the loss and continuing to tone the body. Hopefully ... Mon, 30 May 2011 01:59:33 EST Horrendous trip to the city! <em>40</em> Finally got home from a trip to the city. It took us 13 hrs to make it back home after running into a horrible snow storm plus a 4 hr wait on the highway! My husband and I were stuck on the highway during the storm due to a tractor trailer that had jacknifed - blocked the highway plus has a minimum of 3 other vehicles going the same direction as we were also collide with the tractor trailer. Needless to say we were exhausted - grateful to be home in one piece - cold, tired an... Mon, 18 Apr 2011 00:59:51 EST Yipee!!! Two glorious days off now after long haul - short staffed - 5 wks straight no days off. Plan to get out of bed in the morning only when the bed rejects me! <em>211</em> Sat, 12 Feb 2011 00:52:54 EST 20404 Steps Today!!!! <em>244</em> Boy did I ever surprise myself today. When I took off my pedometer I had walked a staggering 20,404 steps. Just to be sure I was not reading this wrong I checked with my friend who was with me the entire time and her pedometer read the exact same thing! We laughed, cheered and shared our happiness over a lengthy conversation and some strong black coffee. Would not want to to do this every day but we both feel, good about it. We assume that neither of us will have any problem... Mon, 7 Feb 2011 00:33:26 EST COMPUTER RAGE? - Have now experienced it! - LESSONS LEARNED! <em>29</em> last night while getting connected to my Spark pages I did not get a chance to register a log-in even though I spun the wheel!!! The reason was that at the same exact time I did the spin my computer started flashing alerts and messages that my computer and several programs were now under the control of an outside source. Needless to say I was pretty agitated at this point. When I attempted to go on to get back into my Spark site I was automatically shut down and the same messag... Sat, 5 Feb 2011 19:39:15 EST Losing Pounds - is not all there is!!!! Had a dramatic realization over the past few days. Yes it is great to lose weight, change your lifestyle, feel better and look better in general. However, one thing we probably all fail to realize is that once we reach goal our changing does not stop there! We still need to consider tightening up the loose skin with exercise, adjust to the fact that our lifestyle changes must be permanent and stay hungry as my hubbies specialist is always saying. <BR> <BR> Staying hungry can also apply to ... Wed, 5 Jan 2011 23:38:25 EST All Done But the Getting Back on Track! Well, well, well! All the holiday foods are either in our tummies or put in the refrigerator for left overs to be consumed by anyone who will have them! I did not over eat which I am very proud of; however, I did eat several items that I would not normally have. The,"well it's the holiday's you know" mentality took over. As a result I feel like I have fallen off the wagon./////////////////// <BR> <BR> Tomorrow I work a full day and when I get home I intend to get back on track to my usual... Sat, 1 Jan 2011 22:42:59 EST To Goal OR Not to Goal! I was pondering today how I would feel when the last day of the year arrives. HIgh on my priority list is to be @ my weight loss goal. Then I started thinking "What if I don't reach that goal? How will I feel about it? Better question yet - How will I deal with falling short of my goal?" <BR> <BR> After much thought I determined that the only way to approach this possibility is to stay positive, determined and focused. Should I fall short of my goal then I will continue into the new year ... Tue, 28 Dec 2010 21:10:01 EST Special Christmas Gifts To Give! I was reading a letter from my oldest daughter today and the letter was written some years ago. It brought me to tears of happiness and gratitude for the country we live in, the family and friends we all love and sooooo many more blessings we all have in our lives on a regular basis. Below are the points she made in her letter which she wrote to a friend that was going through trials at the time. Her advise to her friends was: <BR> <BR> To your enemies -GIVE - Forgiveness <BR> To your op... Tue, 21 Dec 2010 23:42:04 EST Friend Returning Home Post Amputation. <em>458</em> Thankfully my friend that recently underwent the amputation of her leg above the knee will be returning to her own home next week in time to spend Christmas in her own surroundings. I am grateful for all the support and prayers that were given to her and me through my Spark Friends. The support was and still is very much appreciated. May each one of you be especially blessed this Christmas. The road ahead will still be a challenge but one day at a time is our joint mantra. W... Sat, 18 Dec 2010 23:11:08 EST Surgery more severe than thought Just an update for all of my supporters. Finally some stress relief know that my pal made it through her surgery. Still have stress in reserve as found out her "foot amputation actually turned out to be leg surgery" removal above the knee. Now I just think of a strategy to get my friend to not give up and to work hard and it will be a real challene. Wed, 8 Dec 2010 23:28:01 EST Using "work coping strategies" to change mindset! <em>100</em> Something I was thinking about on and off today while I was @ work was how exactly do I find manage to continue to smile through all the distractions and interruptions that sideline my daily work goals @ my J.O.B.?! While reflecting on this during a short juice break I realized that many of us smile, nod, shrug our shoulders etc etc just to divert our attention. If this method of thought diversion works to get us through the "junk" that occurs during our work lives why can't ... Wed, 1 Dec 2010 23:20:46 EST Rethinking my Strategy After reading several blogs tonight I am rethinking my exercise strategy and my eating habits somewhat as well. Although I have had success with the way I eat at the moment I feel that some tweeking might be in order. I also read an article tonight that focused on "life's simple 7" and was shocked that only 0.1% of the people studied made the changes necessary to increase their quality of life and reduce their potential for heart related illnesses. Being a nurse does not mean that we have ... Mon, 15 Nov 2010 23:54:41 EST Anticipation <em>224</em> Anticipation is a very powerful weapon if we know how to use it correctly. This emotion is usually used and felt when we are looking forward to a great meal, a surprise, a career change, a raise in pay etc. etc. etc...... Have you ever used this emotion as a way to bolster your flagging determination to say no to the bad things we should not eat OR to encourage yourself to get out and exercise? Well this is something that I have been doing for some time now and I find that now... Sun, 7 Nov 2010 23:25:26 EST How do you spend your weekends? Well folks I spent my first weekend off from work getting in touch with my spirit and feeding it abundantly today with plans to do the same tomorrow. My day has ended on a high note because I spent the day doing good deeds both anonymously as well as in full view of others. Without boring you with the details I managed to incorporate some of my own exercise goals, made my spirit soar with bouts of belly chuckles with a friend in the hospital and came home to a nutritious meal with my hubby ... Sat, 6 Nov 2010 23:32:56 EST Fueling Your Energy Well today I hit the wall with my first week back to work and so called "normal routine". During the week it struck me that it was not as easy to find fuel for the energy required to return to my routine as I had thought. ZZZ's <em>102</em> definitely. Exercise <em>315</em> okay this is where the wall comes in. After such a long time away from my usual daily activities I have found that although I have been successful so far with my weight loss goals - returning to exercise success is n... Fri, 5 Nov 2010 23:26:32 EST Finally Back Home & Work A quickie note to all my spark friends and members that have left me goodies, inspirational and supportive messages as well as those of you who have kept me and my family in your prayers. I thank each and every one of you from the bottom of my heart. We arrived home last night late and I have been busy trying to get everything in order to return to a full work schedule this morning. I will log in after work today and try to update everyone and get back into the swing of things. Thank you ... Mon, 1 Nov 2010 00:45:10 EST Light @ the end of the tunnel NOT A TRAIN!!!! Well folks it has been a very long time since I last checked in with everyone. Our family has been excessively busy with the changes necessary to improve our daughter's living situation. She is currently fighting a gastric virus but appears to be in a good frame of mind in spite of her overall condition. We are setting up her new apartment/townhouse living conditions. She will be moving in on Wednesday of this week. We will be having a final family get together on Thursday and hopefully ... Sat, 23 Oct 2010 21:10:37 EST Still standing by Daughter.... Well folks I apologize for not checking in more frequently. My entire family have been very busy finding another facility for my daughter to live in. The home she was previously settled in held bad memories for our daughter as her newest and closest friend suddenly passed away. Our daughter felt the loss so much that she began having multiple grand mal seizures and difficulty with her tube feeding. The long and short of what has been happening is that our daughter has gone through a serie... Sun, 19 Sep 2010 23:09:44 EST Coming out of ICU Dtr should be out of ICU some time tomorrow if all continues to be stable. All prayers have been welcomed and obviously have had an impact. I thank each and every one of my spark friends and spark members who have kept us in their prayers, thoughts and circle of positivity. Your presence has been felt and much appreciated. <BR> <BR> It has been tough keeping "a stiff upper lip"! Trying to stay focused on more positive areas of life has also been tough but I feel that it has been worth th... Sun, 1 Aug 2010 00:55:29 EST ICU still a daily routine....... as our dtr still struggles to recover from her surgery the staff here in the ICU are becoming faithful cheerleaders. Although I myself am in nursing it is with great respect and humble gratitude I accept the day to day care, concern and well meaning encouraging words from the nursing staff and doctors taking care of our dtr. It amazes me the positive energy given freely during an already bussling day for this staff. When you hear the phrase "there are angels among us" take it from me this ... Fri, 23 Jul 2010 23:28:38 EST Daughter in ICU now A quick update to let you know that my daughter apparently suffered an ischemic stroke and required surgery to remove several large clots from her carotid artery. Due to her pre-existing health she is in ICU unit and will be for a few days. I am severely sleep deprived @ the moment as I am the main person staying with her @ the hospital. Rest of the family having too difficult a time watching over her. I pray we will receive a miracle and my babe will pull through this. <em>24</em> <em... Mon, 19 Jul 2010 23:51:35 EST Massive Stroke - Daughter - Emergency Sorry to tell you but my daughter has had another massive stroke and as I am writing this I am waiting for a flight to get to her before she goes into surgery. Needless to say I will be out of the loop for a while now. Will update as I am able. <em>46</em> Fri, 16 Jul 2010 04:08:51 EST Who's been stepping on Spiders??!! <em>27</em> <em>54</em> In need of a new <em>257</em> due to the enormity of the rain storms we've been having. On the up side the fire hazards are very low. Just wondering if there are a lot of people stepping on spiders as my parents use to tell me "never step on a spider or it will rain!" Come on now people - let the spiders go on their merry way will you? <em>246</em> <em>334</em> <em>224</em> Tue, 13 Jul 2010 23:46:37 EST First Guest! Another life lesson is brought to mind today as I finished my work shift. It is amazing how often throughout our day we give continually to others whom we feel have an indirect impact on our lives. BUT their impact can be pretty big. Today I was rewarded with bright smiles, profuse thank you's and for being a support to someone when I had no conscious memory of doing this. <BR> <BR> The young lady who was giving me soooo much praise and thanks for all the little things that were as my pa... Sat, 3 Jul 2010 21:44:21 EST Fragility of Friendship Almost lost a dear friend today. A severe stroke along with a severe kidney infection caused my friend to literally lose the battle of life X2 in ER today. With the grace of God and a lot of talented medical staff working on her a life & a friendship were saved. <BR> <BR> It certainly brought home the fact that friendship literally hangs by a thread @ times. I am so blessed to have this long time friendship stay active & be present when our tears joined in celebration for having our days... Sun, 27 Jun 2010 23:02:17 EST Talked into a long Portage....... .......the reward is to be a terrific, sunny day of trout fishing in our canoe on an isolated, little known, spring fed creek! Well I would never have attempted this 1 year ago but am up for the challenge and eager for the rewards of a fresh caught shore lunch. Will let everyone know how it goes tomorrow. Wish me luck?! @ least the lunch will be very healthy - right? Fri, 25 Jun 2010 23:55:49 EST Work stress BUSTED!!!!! Wel I just want to thank everyone for their concern & prayers. As a working nurse I am soooooo relieved that none of my patients will have to deal with the fallout of a strike. Tonight after much sweat, stressful conditions, irrate co-workers etc. etc. there was a radification vote to accept the terms we were presented with. I for one am greatly relieved and can now concentrate on the treatment of patients instead of the mindless inconsiderations of coworkers that do not consider the conse... Thu, 24 Jun 2010 00:12:41 EST Pins and Needles Am literally living on pins and needles these days as the final work meeting to resolve conflicts approaches tomorrow evening. An unfavorable outcome will mean a great deal of upset for a huge # of nurses and their families. Our small town has had so many of these situations and now I am personally involved in the same situation. Who in their right mind ever thought that an essential service like nursing should be in jeopardy! Will say my prayers and ask for all the positive vibes I can g... Tue, 22 Jun 2010 23:45:04 EST