JUST_KAREN's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=JUST%5FKAREN JUST_KAREN's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ It has been a long time... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5678980 I hate being disabled. I feel so useless. I know I am improving very very slowly - improvement is good just wish it was a wee bit faster. And I do know I have come a long way since last year this time. I finally started to exercise more. Trying to really build my upper body strength for transfers to bench or wheel chair. And my lower body as well so my legs can be a little useful. Even though my right knee was eaten up my the MRSA it is my left knee that is really screwed up. Wed, 23 Apr 2014 20:52:57 EST I am who I am... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5404056 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/7/l1731290643.jpg"> <BR> Not perfect... <BR> <BR> Everything has been such a struggle since last October. The kitty in my picture is my little Lucy - tomorrow they will run more blood tests on her & we will see if she will be ok or if my husband & I need to make the decision to let her go. <BR> <BR> That added into everything else. <BR> <BR> I need to get back on the diet and exercise track -- it is my goal to be full force my Monday July... Thu, 27 Jun 2013 22:48:48 EST Getting back on my feet - literally... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5334186 Hi – I have not been on SP since October 2012 as I have been ill + my knees . Long story short – I had a staph/Mrsa infection that went into my blood stream and knees. I was in the hospital then nursing home (twice) and finally got out. But, I am still not standing yet at my knees are still so weak. I am so scared I will never walk again. The infection is gone thankfully & I am home. I have therapists coming in during the week to help – but my insurance only will pay for a certain number... Wed, 24 Apr 2013 13:23:15 EST November 7, 2012 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5126993 <em>239</em> Hi Everyone, <BR> I an still researching the weight loss surgery, I am definitely ready at this point. I need the surgery for so many reasons - first though it I know I will not make any progress at all without it. Towards the beginning of summer 2013 I have so much to look forward to. I am still scared but I am ready. <BR> <BR> Karen Wed, 7 Nov 2012 08:19:36 EST My Body is finally falling apart http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5126652 I went into the hospital Oct 29th with my knee - severe arthritis and they really cannot put Humpty Dumpty back together again. The classic - "You will need to loose weight (100+ pounds) before they will tough anything at all. I will be in rehab (been here since Friday) Another week or so. As Soon as I am able I do want to get started on weight loss surgery after that. The pain level is tremendous right now. I need a lot of support & friends right now. Help me please. <BR> <BR> Karen Tue, 6 Nov 2012 21:26:30 EST A tired Sunday http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5021619 I am drained today - have not slept well for a few nights now between neighbors with a party & music loud until past 2AM one night & stress. It is going to be a very long 10 hour workday. <BR> <BR> I saw online where someone put apple slices and a cinnamon stick in a container of water and let it sit & it sounded good. I tried the same thing. I went to try it last night - the odor of it was musty and it sort of had a non-taste. Think I will pass on that one. I know I need to get away fr... Sun, 19 Aug 2012 10:09:37 EST It has been a while http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5019955 Ok it has been a long time since I was last on SP - I need to get on some track with eating & exercise. No matter what I do not seem to have the strength. Fri, 17 Aug 2012 20:56:05 EST January 16, 2012 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4684382 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/3/l233828502.jpg"> <BR> Ok, so far I have not gotten back & any where close to the track. I have to though - the last week or so my knees have been screaming at me. Mon, 16 Jan 2012 12:48:50 EST January 9, 2012 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4669178 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/8/7/l870039298.jpg"> <BR> I am halfway through the work day and feeling so ick. Five more hours to go. And naturally it is a busy day too. Ugh! I have decided that once the regular Pepsi is gone that is in the house I will try my hardest to go soda free for the remainder of January. At least it is a start. Mon, 9 Jan 2012 15:51:01 EST January 8, 2012 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4665976 January 8, 2012 <BR> I am so glad so see the end of 2011!!! I have not been very active on Spark People since July of 2011 with everything going on in my life. I know the next few years are going to be hard – I am praying not as hard as 2011. I will also try much harder to be regular on SP – hopefully that will be a big boost as well. <BR> <BR> Yesterday I took a look in the mirror & really did not like what I saw. Nothing new there at all. My knees have been killing me the last few wee... Sun, 8 Jan 2012 11:25:22 EST December 26, 2011 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4638761 I am so ready for this year to be over. I am praying for peace in my life next year. And hoping to get back on track with my eating. I am not making resolutions as I know I won't keep them. Also, there is still too much stress in my life right now - do not need to add more with making resolutions I know I cannot keep. My hope is to lose some weight in 2012. Does not have to be a lot - just some. Of course I would be happy with a lot. Mon, 26 Dec 2011 12:27:14 EST July 18 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4369730 Sigh - since my life went spinning out of control the beginning of February I have gained 40 pounds back. I am not happy with myself a bit. I saw the scale going up and did nothing. I took a look in the mirror yesterday and that made me mad - I could see the added weight in my face and neck (already in the hips that is where it goes first no matter what). My body is just sore from the added weight. I am trying to add smaller bits of activity into my life slowly. And I will try to make b... Mon, 18 Jul 2011 09:56:14 EST June 13 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4295289 Life is not getting much better. I honestly think it will be a minimum 6 months to a year before it really does show signs of improvement. My husband will be gone for a month starting sometime in July. I am going to use that time to really try to get back on track with my eating. Right now yeaterday & today I did bring grapes and a banana into work with me. I nibbled on the grapes all day yesterday. I did eat less junk as a result. It should be about a month before my husband leaves - ... Mon, 13 Jun 2011 09:57:55 EST 5/21/2011 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4247459 I wish I could say things were getting better in my life but they aren't. And it is all out of my control. At this point it is going to be 6 months to several years before there is a change for the better. I am trying to cope the best I can but I am struggling. I know I need to be strong for others but it is so hard. I wish I could see some sort of light at the end of the tunnel. Sat, 21 May 2011 16:41:05 EST 5/21/2011 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4247458 I wish I could say things were getting better in my life but they aren't. And it is all out of my control. At this point it is going to be 6 months to several years before there is a change for the better. I am trying to cope the best I can but I am struggling. I know I need to be strong for others but it is so hard. I wish I could see some sort of light at the end of the tunnel. Sat, 21 May 2011 16:41:05 EST The Nightmare Continues http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4224934 My husband & I found out they are filing criminal charges against him over the situation that started early this year. Don't know much else right now - there is paperwork the postal carrier will deliver today & we will learn more. And sometime this week we will need to contact an attorney. In trying to find what I could last night he could face 6-18 months in hail and a $5000 fine. He has never been in trouble before so I am nost sure what will happen. My prayer is that they realize he n... Wed, 11 May 2011 08:51:42 EST 04/27/2011 Entry http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4194608 Thanks for the support everyone. I think in the next few months I will need a lot. On top of everything else going on I am fairly certain I will be out of a job in a few months. They are firing good workers right & left. We are graded in multiple areas and people who have never not met target for the month are being fired because they have not met for 3 months in a row no matter what they have done. And for the first time there is one of the criteria I will not meet this month. With the... Wed, 27 Apr 2011 16:13:12 EST Praying for life to get better. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4191297 <em>39</em> - Every time I think nothing can get worse it does. I just wonder what will go wrong next. I am feeling so stressed today. And the sad thing is with everything going on I don't see that getting better for a long time. I want to start crying & not stop right now. But, it is not an option at the moment. <em>46</em> Tue, 26 Apr 2011 09:42:31 EST Kitty of the day April 24 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4188669 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/5/l556539521.jpg"> Mon, 25 Apr 2011 08:19:27 EST Happy Easter!!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4187581 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/5/l159154917.jpg"> Sun, 24 Apr 2011 17:05:58 EST Tired http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4032788 I am tired of being sick with this cold. All day today I just have not felt "right" at all. Two more days of work to get through before I have a day off. Seems life is in a waiting pattern right now - waiting for the counselor to call to set up with an appointment with my husband. Not much we can do until then. Just feeling down and lonely I guess. Sun, 20 Feb 2011 15:47:39 EST There is a long road ahead http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4021126 I appreciate all the support I get here - I know I will be needing it so much as time goes on. I believe as my husband goes through counselling he will be diagnosed with Dissociate Identity Disorder. I have assured my husband that I am not leaving him. But, I know it is going to be hard on both of us dealing with everything. I know I will also need some counselling to help deal with the situation. I have been concerned about him committing suicide - especially as he deals with what he ... Tue, 15 Feb 2011 22:39:58 EST I want to wake up from this nightmare http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4017878 They say that life never throws more at you than you can deal with. I have to wonder & disagree. Since Friday my life has been turned upside down & every which way possible. The mental numbness & shock are wearing off & now it feels like this sureal nightmare & that I will wake up any minute. But, I do know I that it is all too real. I know the next few weeks and the months to come are going to be a day by day struggle. I admit I am scared. Do I have the strength? All I can do is pray... Mon, 14 Feb 2011 19:53:29 EST Weighed in for the BL competion at work, UGH!!!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3998519 Here I am right back up to where I was a year ago -5 pounds. UGH!!!! The competition runs for 14 weeks. I have no allusions that I will win. I went over the #s last year & it will be more likely someone who has less weight to lose. I just want to get on track again & lose some of this weight before summer - to actually show some progress. I know it is the same old broken record over & over again. I really have to get a new tune <em>335</em> I will say this tho I have walked a bit mor... Mon, 7 Feb 2011 15:44:40 EST Cats & other stuff http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3965466 My cats have been squabbling since yesterday morning. Yesterday afternoon here was a tiff that nearly ended up in a big blow up. But Daisy thankfully went & hid for rest of the day as she was the instigator. In the mean time Harry decides yesterday was a good day to make progress in coming out of the bathroom where he has hidden for the past months. I went to do laundry yesterday afternoon & he was not in the bathroom - found him on my bed asleep with Teddy. Last night when I went to bed... Thu, 27 Jan 2011 10:13:19 EST Struggling http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3963279 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/7/5/l756053950.jpg"> <BR> Just wish every day was not another problem to deal with. Keep praying life will get better in general but it never does. I feel so alone so much of the time. I love my cats & they do help (well except days like today when they are not getting along the best). I know the rotten winter weather is not helping any. Today is a day all I have wanted to do is cry. I know my life is not the worst that there is out there. ... Wed, 26 Jan 2011 15:23:08 EST January 8th http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3903157 <em>39</em> I really need to try harder to get back on track. The stress around me is not going to lessen any time soon & I need to learn to work around it. I did very little on my days off from work once again. I chalked part of it to not sleeping well 2 of the nights but still... I know by the time I get to Wednesday I am tired & it is hard to get anything done. But, it still no excuse to get very little done the other days off. I get so frustrated with myself. Sat, 8 Jan 2011 11:15:44 EST 2011 ~ Day #1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3876476 January 1, 2011 <BR> I am so glad to get rid of 2010. For me (& I know many) 2010 was a horrible year. I weighed in today at 327 – back where I started in the summer time. Ugh! My resolve is not at full-force to get back on track yet. I did pack my lunch today – salad, low fat dressing, cottage cheese etc. Just feel frustrated – I know I need to get back on track I do. I think a big part of me does not believe I am capable of losing the weight. I get to 315 and stall each and every ti... Sat, 1 Jan 2011 11:27:57 EST So long 2010 - Looking to a better 2011 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3871805 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/1/l110451072.jpg"> <BR> I am so glad to give 2010 a drop kick. It has been an unfortunate year. I am hoping & praying for a better 2011 - not only for me but for everyone that is struggling in one way or another. I want to get healthier & lose weight. I want to make my house more of a home than just simply a house. I know I cannot do these things alone. Thu, 30 Dec 2010 12:54:47 EST October 29 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3748652 I may not know many things in life but I do know I need to get back on track! I have to find the strength in me and the faith that I can do it. I need to find my place in life in general I think. Most of the time I have no idea where that is. I think that would go a long way to being able to be more consistent and to remain on track trying to get healthy <BR> <BR> I am trying to plan for my work schedule change that begins November 1st. I go to 4 – 10 hour shifts. I will work Saturday ... Fri, 29 Oct 2010 14:31:46 EST October 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3684362 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/8/9/l895607244.jpg"> <BR> Ok, so I am starting yet again to try to get back on track. As of this morning I weigh 318.7 so 319 basically. I am not going to weigh in again until November 1st. But, Later today I will take my measurements also so hopefully if the weight is not down much they shrink a wee bit in the month. Tomorrow we will stop at Goodwill & see if the exercise bike we saw last weekend is still there (though I doubt it). Fri, 1 Oct 2010 10:13:28 EST The track keeps running away again http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3682381 I started off good but then quickly fell off track. And ever since I have struggled to get back on track. I think deep down part of me figures I can never win at losing weight. That negative feeling like there is not much at life I succeed at so why should this be different? I am not thinking I will ever be a tiny person I would be happy at even a few sizes smaller than I am now. Confidence is something I have always struggled with & this is no different. Thu, 30 Sep 2010 14:15:22 EST One Step Back But Still Going Forward http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3589390 Ok so yesterday was a step back - I did have a Pepsi. However, I am back on track today. I have been debating on the scale issue on to weigh weekly or monthly. I think I will stick with Sundays for now & see how that goes. I do realize it is a life-style and not a diet. Especially after eating the pizza yesterday & my body screaming at me after. I will stick with just one slice from now on. I will have to get more creative about my food as the budget is getting really tight right now.... Mon, 30 Aug 2010 14:10:25 EST Sigh... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3582954 <em>39</em> Think I am starting the war with the scale up & down a few pounds a few times before making any progress. This happens everytime I try to lose weight & I wnd up so discouraged. I want to lose weight so bad but it is this struggle that gets to me. I may have my husband put the scale in the trunk for a least a week so I cannot weigh in - for my own sanity. Part of me wants to just cry & give up but the other part of me knows I need to lose weight for so many reasons. I just wi... Sat, 28 Aug 2010 11:59:25 EST Frustrations http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3577647 Ok, so like an idiot I got on the scale this morning after weighing in yesterday morning. I was really hoping to hit the 15 pound weight loss. However, the scale had jumped 2 pounds instead. <em>46</em> Grrrr... Ok, I know big mistake getting on it today instead of waiting until my usual Sunday. But, it just made me so frustrated. I know for me sometimes I can go up or down a couple pounds in a day. But, I had been going down so consistently since I renewed my weight loss effort & I did... Thu, 26 Aug 2010 16:51:56 EST Wednesday Ramblings http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3573522 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/8/4/l847893016.jpg"> <BR> I have made it to day 17 with no Pepsi. I have had some cravings yes, but resisted. I got on the scale and have lost another 1.5 pounds for a total of 14.7 so far. Almost 15 pounds! <BR> <BR> As much as I love my husband he does frustrate me at times. I know he means well when he offers me seconds etc. But, geez honey no no no do not offer please. I know he is under so much stress right now too I don't want to pus... Wed, 25 Aug 2010 13:21:24 EST Fear of the scale & other stuff http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3570354 I admit it I am a bit afraid to step on the scale tomorrow. Is this the point I start to struggle up & daown a few pounds before losing like every time in the past when I have tried to lose weight. Or will I have a little more success before the struggle starts? <BR> <BR> It is day 16 with no Pepsi <em>222</em> ! <BR> <BR> I am debating if going to the pool and getting the exercise started is a good idea or bad for tomorrow. My knees have been hurting so much lately - to the point of kee... Tue, 24 Aug 2010 15:26:38 EST Sunday chatter http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3563378 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/3/2/l328209170.jpg">I went with my hubby to visit some family I had not seen in a long time & we ate lunch at Bob Evans. Even though I still got my favorites fried mush, hash browns & bacon I did have the sugar free Smuckers syyrup & water with just lemon & spelnda in it. I will still be in calorie range for th day since I planned for eating out. Sigh but days off go way too fast & tomorrow is the dreaded Monday once again. Sun, 22 Aug 2010 18:58:53 EST Feel better today - but just wanna eat! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3557434 I am less blue today. But, I just want to eat! I thought about those drawings with the thermometer and how you mark off a segment for each increment that is achieved towards goal. So I drew one of those & hung it up at work. Right now I am almost half way to my first goal, only 2 pounds to go. Since starting back I have lost 12.6 pounds. <BR> <BR> I am not sure what to do for exercise. I will try going to the Y when the pool reopens in September but I am afraid the pool will be too ... Fri, 20 Aug 2010 14:22:24 EST I feel 5 shades of blue today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3553507 <em>39</em> I am not sure what is going on today - I just want a hug from my mom & mom has been gone for years. I know it is probably the little bits of stress have just come to a boiling point. And this will pass in a day or so. <BR> <BR> I did find out I got approved to the 4 - 10 hour weekend shift at work. Starting November 1st I will be working Saturday - Tuesday 10am to 9pm. I am not sure how it will go but for a variety of reasons I thought the 4 day work week will be better. ... Thu, 19 Aug 2010 11:55:03 EST Day 8 & Still No Pepsi! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3542634 <em>222</em> <BR> I have made it to day 8 & I am still Pepsi-free! Yeah! <em>248</em> <BR> <BR> My thoughts this morning went to -- how much weight do I need to lose before I feel more energy? I have zero energy most days. I know once I hadd in exercise it will start to help. But, I also realize that once I lose some weight it will help. I am just tired of being tired. <BR> <BR> I had a day off yesterday & still stayed in my calorie range. So that I am happy about. I allowed mysel... Mon, 16 Aug 2010 12:42:07 EST Long Term Goal Reward http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3539392 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/3/l536247479.jpg"> <BR> While I was unable to sleep last night & web surfing I figured out what I want as a reward when I hit my goal -- a sewers dress form -- cannot get one big enough now & once I hit goal I would love to create some artsy things to wear. For the smaller 20-30 pound goals probably a t-shirt. <BR> <BR> Now having decided what my reward for my long term reward is - I am not totally sure where that goal is. I realize I am nev... Sun, 15 Aug 2010 14:16:52 EST Year End Goals & Roadblocks I know that are coming http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3537284 <em>409</em> So my year end goal is to be under 300 pounds. It really hit me yesterday this this is doable. That is 22 pounds to lose before then. But, then I am going to run into the holidays starting with Halloween - each holiday has something unhappy associated with it through the end of the year. And I know I will be down. I try to not let it but it does. Not sure how the family will do for Christmas this year - last Christmas was an unbelievable nightmare. I will try to net let t... Sat, 14 Aug 2010 18:42:36 EST The Big Picture vs. Smaller Pictures http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3536385 <em>239</em> In thinking & reading posts the past couple days. I realize the BIG picture is so intimidating. I know I have a LOT of weight to lose. And if I solely concentrate on that I will be discouraged so quickly. So instead I am going to concentrate on 20 - 30 pound increments. <em>11</em> I want to find something inexpensive to reward myself after each achievement. For this first one which is to be under 300 by the end of 2010 I will replace my t-shirt I love with a kitty face on ... Sat, 14 Aug 2010 11:58:11 EST Day 4 without Pepsi but I almost got one... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3530676 The past two days have been so stressful. Took my kitty to the vet to see why she was peeing everywhere. Evidently she is in heat & marking her territory like a male. She is at the vet getting spayed today. I am a wreck. She is my sleeping buddy at night. Really missed the brat last night. She stayed at the vet as she was impossible to put in the carrier in the first place. I worry when my "babies" are having anything done. The other 2 that need spayed have an appointment at a low cos... Thu, 12 Aug 2010 16:48:07 EST Think I finally found the track... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3518521 <em>321</em> For so long I have been struggling to get back on track. But, I think I finally found that elusive track. Yesterday I rest my goals on SP for a 30 pound loss by end of the year. That will bring me down the 300. A weight I have not been in a very very long time. I have started tracking my foods again. And I am really trying to go cold turkey on the Pepsi. My hubby noted yesterday we were running low in my full octane Pepsi & was going to get more & I said NO! Hopefully I ... Mon, 9 Aug 2010 14:29:38 EST Woe is me babble http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2910842 <em>39</em> I know it is getting to that time of month so I am already feeling down because of that. But, everything going on around me lately is just getting to me. Just seems like a lot to handle right now. Hopefully, in a day or two I will be less sore from my fall on the ice at work. Just seemed most of me was sore today & I felt so worn out. Then the worry over my kitty Harry - hopefully the vet will have some ideas when I take him in this week & I am already dreading putting him i... Sun, 21 Feb 2010 21:50:57 EST 2010?? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2676473 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/5/2/b524700451.jpg"> <BR> 2010 – I had hoped the year would start off on a brighter note but sadly it didn’t. Most of 2009 was such a struggle. I feel pretty much like in the past 18 months I have been chewed up and spit out a few times. I know that somehow I need to get a grip on things & get on track with my health. I just feel lost & do not know where to go from here really. I am just hoping & praying things improve for everyone this year. Fri, 1 Jan 2010 15:33:48 EST My Dad passed away http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=1965159 Thursday my Aunt found my Dad at his house. He had been gone a few days. It is just a hard time right now. So many feeling and emotions. Sun, 12 Apr 2009 08:48:55 EST Why Are We So Judgemental? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=1832656 Ok, at this point I am probably going to leave one of my teams. It is a Biggest Loser team. Why? Simply because for some reason some think that the contestants on The Biggest Loser are not allowed to express human feelings. They are not allowed to be human as they are simply a character in a show. It has become ok to ridicule them as if they were Hollyweird celebrity. These people are not professional actors. These people are human beings. And the last I checked human beings expressed... Thu, 26 Feb 2009 16:10:25 EST