JUSTYNA7's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=JUSTYNA7 JUSTYNA7's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Stopping the Sabatoge http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6299122 A good friend on SP blogged a while ago (I only read it today) about starting the days out with great intentions then as evening comes, throwing caution to the wind and getting caught up in the food again. She asked why? Here is my response: <BR> <BR> Oh, oh, oh, pick me, pick me! OK, I don't know the answer for sure but it is so funny you blogged this because I was talking to my meditation buddy this morning. <BR> <BR> She said "drinking happens for her at night because she is faced w... Mon, 16 Jan 2017 09:15:08 EST Great great day and great week ahead! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6298793 I am going to call today a success. The week is finally over. And I have a lot to think about. <BR> <BR> The B&B hosted a large group last night. 5 massage tables set up rotating people every 15 minutes and I never saw a table empty. Tables piled with food. A fantastic ice breaker. Water volleyball and always a full hot tub and sauna. The reviews on line have been fantastic from the club that came here... of our place and our hosting and they have booked 3 more events for later in the... Sun, 15 Jan 2017 19:59:33 EST Thinking ahead http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6295952 Yesterday's experiment turned out OK. The baked vegan donuts... certainly not donuts.. more like a donut shaped muffin that is very seedy because of the high concentrate of chia seeds! Hubby and DD middlest who are Gluten free liked them enough despite how healthy they are. I will make them for my next vegan guests though and see what she thinks. <BR> <BR> One of my "aims" before Christmas was to clean out the freezer. I did that, defrosting it and making it spotless and made an inven... Wed, 11 Jan 2017 10:39:05 EST Gentle pushes forward http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6295294 It is certainly the time of year to discuss weather. More snow coming today. 5-10 cm. It has been -30 but is going up to -2 and there might be freezing rain... groan. .. I managed to get out snow shoeing/geocaching on the weekend and was so thankful because once the biting wind passed the sun was out and it was lovely with fox and rabbit tracks and some kind of "playing" on the river evidenced by the rolling and prance prints. I have been swimming a couple of times, doing 10 laps only bu... Tue, 10 Jan 2017 11:53:41 EST Traditions http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6284513 Traditions are what we make them. I remember one year when my kids were little. We had no family around and after spending many years traveling to be with one family or the other we were looking at "another" holiday by ourselves because we could not afford to go. My daughter came home from school with the assignment to write about our traditions. I had a moment of feeling sad that my kids were missing out... and then reality hit. Traditions are made. I had moved so many times as a kid t... Fri, 23 Dec 2016 11:09:46 EST Committment http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6283452 I've shared this before: <BR> <BR> "There's a difference between interest and commitment. <BR> When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstances permit." <BR> <BR> I love this because it is true about me. I WANT to be committed to my eating and exercise plans but I fade away especially when I'm tired or busy. But it took on new meaning today when I read this one: <BR> <BR> "When you make a commitment you build hope. <BR> When you keep it you build trust."... Tue, 20 Dec 2016 17:41:52 EST Sunday - winter wonderland outside and inside we will be baking up a storm! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6282370 As often happens this started as a thread on a spark team: <BR> <BR> We did our Christmas tree hunt yesterday. Yay! A foot of snow plus the drifts. -4 F so it was nippy. Had a ball. 2 trees and since we wanted a white pine and DD youngest wanted a scotch pine we did a lot of walking in the drifts. The puppy had so much fun bounding through the snow. Lost 2 booties but they got found. I forgot my snow shoes but it was pretty light stuff. The farm had a tractor to pull the double wagons which ... Sun, 18 Dec 2016 07:19:59 EST Thirsty Thursday and Gratefulness today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6281258 I started this on a thread and figured I would cut and paste and keep going: <BR> <BR> -27 today and snowy. I had to go to the doctor. Subconjuctival hemorage... ie a bloody eye. My doctor said it is my diabetes and high blood pressure. He took my blood pressure in the office and yes it is high. I am so... mad, frustrated, worried. I never had high blood pressure before. It was always white coat syndrome and went away the moment I left his office. Last time he insisted I start on the... Thu, 15 Dec 2016 10:18:26 EST Food Addiction is Real http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6280454 I just read this new sparkpeople article about food addiction. <BR> <BR> http://www.sparkpeople.com/blog/blog.asp<BR>?post=food_addiction_is_real_and_6_way<BR>s_to_deal <BR> <BR> You would not think, after all my experience and all my blogs as a compulsive eater that I would have any doubts- yet I found the article very comforting. I ride this food addiction roller coaster doing well for a while then struggling. Sometimes it can be ages until I feel the downward spiral but it is just as d... Tue, 13 Dec 2016 14:42:54 EST A wall of glass... my choice! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6276589 I sent a spark mail to a friend and thought I could post some of it here. I had a great meditation this morning. My neighbour is a recovering alcoholic and we have a lot in common yet sometimes we don't "get" each other's issues. She was telling me she is eating sugar like crazy and I repeated back to her the things she has been doing the past week to see if she could make the connection herself that sometimes we change addictions. It is not my call to say maybe she has a sugar problem. ... Mon, 5 Dec 2016 08:59:31 EST Grateful wishes for you http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6275738 I am so very grateful today. I was doing a remember when when sending a spark mail. I used to carry so much emotion around with me. A huge suitcase of baggage. That reminds me of a story told by a minister at a wedding I went to. He said that the bride was so excited because she finally would have someone to carry her bags for her. And when she lugged them up to the alter she was dismayed to find the groom had twice as much baggage as she did. I wonder how much I made DH carry for me. ... Sat, 3 Dec 2016 11:17:30 EST The strength to do your bidding http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6273745 Morning friends! Ah the world is spinning quickly today. My painter has the flu so I need to juggle things to see when he can fit in between guests. Some of it is a second coat, some of it is a flat roof, but some of it is removing old textured ceiling and painting which is BIG. I was delighted to have figured out how to bring my computer out to the pool area, open the meditation CD that my neighbour brought over for us but the speakers made the sound terrible. The aquafit this afternoon ... Tue, 29 Nov 2016 08:54:15 EST Return to an old routine http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6273189 Today is "Mix it up" Monday and the challenge is to find exercises to do in every room of the house. I have a big house so this is going to be fun. I am putting up post it notes as reminders and with them a message to myself to remind me about my journey.. motivational quotes. 17 to make up this morning over coffee. <BR> <BR> Last week was about paying it forward. I'm not sure why. It might have been a meditation, I don't recall. But I found myself letting people in when driving in tra... Mon, 28 Nov 2016 08:35:58 EST Rambling blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6272716 I have been painting the headboard for the new guest room. I saw one I really liked on Kijiji. It was from the Chateau Laurier which in Ottawa is a very old and gracious hotel right by Parliament buildings. But I have spent a LOT of money and about to pay the bills. No, have to make do. <BR> <BR> I'm happy with the new driveway and happier that I got a snow plowing contract this year for the first time. They have done it three times already and each time I have only had to do the walk... Sun, 27 Nov 2016 09:08:44 EST Fair vs Need http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6270193 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/e4b665e3-68fa-439e-98e3-4829eba07d9e.jpg"> <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/69326815-bd00-475b-9352-338fccbc81ad.jpg"> Here is the cat... at her largest with my large mini schnauzer. She was 22 pounds! <BR> <BR> My spark friend Chris asked me if 400 calories for each meal and then healthy snacks in between sounded about right. I've heard that too. And then... I know that as we age we need fewer calories. I guess it depends ... Mon, 21 Nov 2016 09:19:35 EST The cat and I http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6269905 Thank God my challenge today is no sugar. I have been stressed and my mind has gone to many sugary treats... but I have none in the house. I actually asked my SIL to bring chocolate on Thursday when they come for dinner, lol. Her son works at Lindt. Sabatoge in the making. Talk to me Thursday and see how I decide to deal with that. But no sugar it has been. <BR> <BR> Now here is my other thought... one I have had before. The cat was overweight for years. We tried many things and I ... Sun, 20 Nov 2016 17:42:33 EST The Freezer http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6269428 There is supposed to be a high of 14 today (5.5 right now and it is already after 2:00 so is this true?) so I decided it was now or never to clean out the garage freezer and do an inventory. Snow is meant to come on Monday and soon any temperatures above freezing will be more likely in spring. <BR> <BR> At the peak of my eating disorder I think every pantry and freezer inch was crammed full and yet I would use my enabler family members to get us to eat out frequently or I would have no ide... Sat, 19 Nov 2016 14:26:37 EST I'm trying to repost my success story... had problems sharing it with a spark friend today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6268465 <link>www.sparkpeople.com/blog/blog.asp?po<BR>st=justyna_lost_65_pounds_with_a_littl<BR>e_help_from_her_sparkfriends </link> Thu, 17 Nov 2016 13:14:15 EST Sponsor family and my plan to regulate my blood sugars http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6266058 Yesterday was crazy busy. It was the "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" fundraiser that I have been helping organize and I provided gluten free bread and dessert for the buffet, had auction items to organize and was answering phone calls. Hubby also decided it was the right day to stain the deck and given that he arrived home with the staid mid afternoon and the days are short I ended up out there with him. Fortunately he was the one getting between the boards and I only had to use a long handled... Sun, 13 Nov 2016 08:09:51 EST Do I wish I did not have to "work" at being thin all the time? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6265604 Do I wish I did not have to "work" at being thin all the time? This was a question one my good spark friends asked. Sometimes. My journey seems to be telling me that being broken made me who I am. The struggle is part of who I am. I think I no longer have a problem with being fat. No. I was at a party in costume but people recognized me by my shape and I was OK with that. In fact, when I saw that my husband who no one recognized in costume was being ignored I was pretty happy to be k... Sat, 12 Nov 2016 09:06:48 EST PLAN FOR NANOWRIMO http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6265349 Friday already???!!! And more distressing is it is November 11th which is 11 days into Nanowrimo and I have not started writing yet. BUT I still have time. I have taken time off work and have the next 3 weeks available to have a routine, look after me because I Matter, and write 50,000 words. How? I am off to a good start with my new spark buddy who has given me some challenges. I tweaked them so that I can succeed. I also printed them so they can go on my fridge... I have such a bad m... Fri, 11 Nov 2016 16:40:35 EST To my American friends to cheer you up! A message from Canadians http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6264912 http://youtu.be/stGhjokq57U <BR> <BR> Darn the link does not seem to be working... but cut and paste this and watch it. I hope it makes you smile. We know that you as a Nation are doing the best that you can and sometimes that is pretty awesome. We do love you and all the greatness that you are! <BR> <BR> <link>youtu.be/stGhjokq57U </link> <BR> <BR> p.s. thanks Bonnie for your help figuring out the link! Thu, 10 Nov 2016 18:17:39 EST Choices and walls http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6264547 Today was a good day. In my meditation I read about making choices. I can stay focused on my needs and how they often conflict with each other but I can CHOOSE to do A or B and respect the needs I am trying to meet in doing so. I always have a choice and the knowledge helps me stay positive, and have self compassion. I choose to believe that the US election will bring something positive to the world. I choose to believe that I can and will be the best I can be. I choose to be grateful f... Wed, 9 Nov 2016 22:17:16 EST Waking up - Self Respect http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6255005 I'm reading another Brene Brown book (Rising Strong) and also doing a daily "meditation.. but more like a learning moment" using Non Violent Communication. They are really doing a number on my thinking. In fact I think I "woke up" today. <BR> <BR> The first thought or realization is that feelings, which like many people I strongly avoid, might be layered. One of the feelings that is the hardest to feel might be "hurt" and according to the book we will do anything we can to avoid actuall... Fri, 21 Oct 2016 13:46:25 EST What is Beauty? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6246105 Yesterday morning I was sitting beside my Sister in law who I admire sooo much and she made a comment that shocked me. It was to the effect that she has never been beautiful. Not that she never FELT beautiful... but never was a beauty. I woke up this morning wondering about that. The first time I met my sister in law was the days before her wedding where I was her brother's "plus one". She was quite stunning. First of all, tall and slender. Confident. Funny. Her whole being was one o... Tue, 4 Oct 2016 07:22:33 EST Tarts and Vickers http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6243721 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/6d7bc866-3615-4fd6-95e8-2e18b727d2c2.jpeg"> <BR> <BR> As promised... my costume. I'm the tart, lol. I think 75% of the people were dressed like some type of clergy... from nuns, priests, cardinals, and monks to Jehova's witnesses. Lots of dancing and so much food. One man had dressed up in drag and that surprised me. I had zero sugar and drank only water. I was very proud of myself. I had brought a cheese and meat platter and had fruit ... Thu, 29 Sep 2016 14:47:44 EST Bobble head Justyna http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6237363 Apparently I have a bobble head. My physio thinks all my symptoms of pain and weakness relate to my neck problems. The X-ray showed a lot of degeneration, nerve impingement in the foramen (spaces for the nerves) and bony spurs that stop mobility. It does not look good but she was most concerned about the looseness of my neck compared to the tightness of other muscles that I use to compensate. She has a plan. Good, because I am so frustrated with "rest". My chiropractor has done wonders f... Sat, 17 Sep 2016 11:27:45 EST Courage http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6229979 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/53aaafc9-f1ea-4155-a4eb-1f082ff36616.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I am reading a book "Gifts of Imperfection" and the first thing it talks about is courage. Doing things because we have to but don't want to.. takes courage. Change takes courage. I have been imagining that button I have that allows me to push through hard stuff and using that for the little things lately. I AM a courageous person. I just have not ever seen it in myself. <BR> <BR> <i... Sun, 4 Sep 2016 11:37:10 EST Update on the Justy-moments http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6221354 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/02315909-f5c2-4d00-aa2d-207ba2a0c42e.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Justy-moments seemed to work yesterday... grouping my "self care" "I Matter" activities. eg. water and meds and crunches/core exrcises.... or water and meds and nails (I play harp) and skin care.... or water and go outside and meditation (That vs. a list that I seemed to skip things regularly on. It seemed to revolve around putting a group of things in one room or space. I'll try again t... Sat, 20 Aug 2016 10:12:19 EST Justy-moments http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6220759 Listen. That was the message today that I woke up with. I have been thinking a lot and I guess it is time to take a break from that. <BR> <BR> I shared that with my walking meditation buddy this morning and it was amazing how many things kind of fell into place. <BR> <BR> One, I shared that my chiropractor asked me if I have been taking my daily salmon oil supplements to which my mind thought... where ARE those? Then he asked if I have been doing my 3x/week exercises. I wondered when ... Fri, 19 Aug 2016 07:58:53 EST Embracing Imperfection http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6220213 Bare with me... I know I am hovering over this theme. Nice image actually... like a hummingbird sipping out sweet nectar from a flower. Perhaps that is exactly what I am doing. <BR> <BR> Imperfection. It was funny how I reacted to the new Ikea catalogue. At first I was shocked. I don't know if you have seen it but it features a lot of pictures of real life going on in the photos. Like kitchens with dirty dishes piled up in the sink and mismatched ... well, everything. I love the Ike... Thu, 18 Aug 2016 09:18:43 EST I AM http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6218552 I am finished my book "The Gifts of Imperfection" and have spent time between chores typing out a summary. I am hoping that a friend or two will want to discuss it chapter by chapter and I want to be able to refer to parts as well as reread some while I absorb the words. I'm sometimes slow doing that.... reading a word, a phrase or paragraph and letting it slosh about in my brain until it gets osmosed where it is supposed to. I am not sure if it is age... or just that important things take... Mon, 15 Aug 2016 18:04:20 EST A,E,I,O,U,Y http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6217823 A = have I been "A" abstinent today? (However you define that - staying away from self numbing behaviours like alcohol, food, work, computer) <BR> E = have I "E" exercised today? <BR> I = what have "I" I done for myself today? <BR> O = what have I done for "O" others today? <BR> U = am I holding on to "U" unexpressed emotions today? <BR> Y = "Y" Yeah! What is something good that has happened today? <BR> <BR> I'm reading a book called "The gifts of Imperfection": Let Go of Who You Think... Sun, 14 Aug 2016 13:58:57 EST Learning to kick shame out of my head! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6215991 BonnieMargay hit the nail on the head yesterday... relaxing can be really hard! My day of rest yesterday was probably the best thing I could have done for myself. It allowed me to "hear" what I needed to. <BR> <BR> I was given a book and will share more when I have finished it, but it described me and my symptoms of feeling shame perfectly. <BR> <BR> 1. I am all excited about something and then I get scared. I worry I will be judged, not fit in, that things won't go well. My exciteme... Thu, 11 Aug 2016 07:57:01 EST Day of Rest http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6215393 I've invited local women to come by to swim and relax and sun... and one who is coming is a spark person! It will help me stay on track as she is low carb (or zero carb, I can't remember) so I have suggested people bring no carb foods to share. <BR> <BR> My meditation buddy is coming over too with a friend so she says she won't "need me" at all which is good This is not about looking after others but about looking after me. She also gave me a book she thinks will help given me current t... Wed, 10 Aug 2016 08:15:10 EST Shame - a rambling blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6214363 The past weekend I had items with sugar or overate at times and my clothes feel snug today. I am over tired after working, partying with family, and canoeing. But... today is also the start of MY weekend as guests have checked out and I have a few days "off". The plan today is to continue doing good things for myself. I have put out an invite for women to drop in to the B&B one day this week as an attempt to keep myself on track. A day of swimming and talking and eating healthy foods and... Mon, 8 Aug 2016 13:24:01 EST The good thing about the plan http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6211009 Having a food plan is really helping me stay on track, so today I made an exercise plan. It was a good idea because had I not committed with people to exercise I likely would have convinced myself not to do it.. or more likely done other things postponing the exercise until it was not viable. Because my neighbour was sure she wanted to walk, I was in my runners, ready to go at 6:00 am at the bottom of her driveway. The "signal" is having the porch light "on" and I could feel my heart sinki... Tue, 2 Aug 2016 13:10:16 EST The Plan to go off sugar http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6209642 <em>3</em> Oh I should read blogs every day. I always seem to hear what I need. <BR> <BR> Today my friend SEAGLASS1215 has committed to going off sugar, eating more whole foods. I wrote: "We are talking the SAME language and doing the same thing... so if I can be of ANY support... I am HERE! Going off sugar is hard at the start but not impossible. I think "Easy Does It" is a great motto and I never beat myself up for choosing foods with small amounts of sugar but that is for you to dec... Sun, 31 Jul 2016 09:19:31 EST Naked http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6206863 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/22092039-c8c1-4df3-9f18-942ea2525a98.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I am a work in progress when it comes to body image. Just when I think "I don't care what people think" I find myself worried that someone will judge me because of a bulge in my clothing. One day I can be excited because my clothes are loose and I have curves.. and the next day my outfit will be smaller and less flattering... but I am still ME. I have not changed. Just the outfit. And ... Tue, 26 Jul 2016 08:09:36 EST Food vs. Junk http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6204836 Once again I was reading a Spark Friend's blog and got carried away with my comment... so I have copied it here. I was wondering how tracking of her food is going and realized that we do it differently. There is no right way... just what works for YOU. I had a lot of comments on my last food tracker blog about this tool and how many people depend on it. That does not mean we all do it the same way. Spark People's tracker has many things we can look at. I do find that good/better/best wo... Fri, 22 Jul 2016 10:56:10 EST The "I Matter" Challenge http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6203671 I am guilty of neglecting my basic needs and having an "I Matter" list on my fridge helped with two things. When I went off track it was a way for me to do one thing, anything from my list, and get back on track. Second, it was a reminder of what things I can do for myself every day that make me feel healthy and good about myself. <BR> <BR> <BR> A. The challenge for this week is to make an "I Matter" LIst. <BR> <BR> <BR> B. At the end of the list think of one thing you are looking forwa... Wed, 20 Jul 2016 09:45:00 EST Tracking food -thoughts http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6203057 I was reading a spark friend's blog about recommitting to tracking and I got a little carried away in my response.. which of course is what support for each other is all about... making us think for ourselves. So here is my response to where she was talking about the time involved in tracking and whether it is really a tool that is even working for her: <BR> <BR> <BR> Oh you are so right! Tracking is a tool to judge our behaviour, not a way to judge ourselves. It is one that we can defin... Tue, 19 Jul 2016 08:55:01 EST I am Loved and Safe http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6202450 In Lesson one of Marianne Williamson's Course in Weight loss (my 3rd time working on it) I found myself mesmerized by the line that says we built a wall around ourselves because we were afraid of people. The last times doing this I dealt with a lot of anger "bricks in my wall" but this one about fear seemed less important. <BR> <BR> Thinking about it though I must have grown up afraid of people. By the time I was 14 I had moved 14 times and then stopped counting. New situations, being the... Mon, 18 Jul 2016 09:23:09 EST Compassion vs. Truth http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6197990 My brother came by the other day and I asked how he was doing. He had just been to a counselor at a cancer family support clinic and asked for a "tool" he could use when his wife is anxious. He described situations where her anxiety is triggered by something he says or does and how he usually responds (a truth statement) and how the counselor recommended responding (a compassion statement). I listened, nodding my head and noticed my daughter nodding her head and looking at me. Why? I ten... Sun, 10 Jul 2016 10:19:55 EST Remembering who I am http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6196426 Yesterday's meditation: <BR> <BR> Focus not on responsibilities so much as setting an example. I had that thought and it was just a tweak in perspective. I have a lot on my plate at times and I can feel like I have to look after everyone.. but they are adults. It is not my job to make sure they have a good time or get well or use their time well... but it is certainly something I can do for myself and in so doing, I think create a place where others can do the same. I finally have been ab... Thu, 7 Jul 2016 11:04:41 EST Back to the beginning- A course in Weight Loss http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6194498 I opened up my Marianne Williamson book to the introduction to get inspiration for this morning's walk. She says that what happens in your mind determines your experience of life and I totally agree. At any moment I can look at a situation from many frames of reference and change my experience of it. "That's too bad..".. can become "actually it was fortunate because..." and realizing that sometimes it is not all about me but about someone else.... or just deciding that I am going to en... Mon, 4 Jul 2016 08:54:39 EST I Matter http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6194047 I got out my Marianne Williamson book... have not opened it, but at least it is out. <BR> <BR> I did some me things this morning while waiting for guests to get up... like stretches and sorting my meds. I did my chiropractic exercise. And now... I am going to spend a few minutes outdoors before doing some errands. I would list all the things I got done this morning but it would tire people out reading it, lol. What I need to do though is look after myself and I can feeling myself slidi... Sun, 3 Jul 2016 10:58:03 EST Great start http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6189275 I've been sharing with some of my spark friends that I am good with exercise but worried about food. The scale says I am exactly where I was when I left.. which is just fine with me. I am doing a 3 mile walk each morning and there is lots to do in the house and garden so I have no concerns about getting my 10,000 steps in... still I put on my spark tracker this morning just to make me feel good about myself. <BR> <BR> Food. What do I want to be eating? Not eating? I need some real tho... Sat, 25 Jun 2016 09:13:15 EST I'm back and ready to go! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6188913 I am back. Back from a wonderful trip that was more like 4 holidays. I have so much to process in my mind about it... but of course it is nearly impossible because my main bathroom has been gutted while I was away and I have a wedding party arriving tomorrow to stay at the B&B. What I did do, because I MATTER, was get up early and go for a walk. I do appreciate living in a lovely town and having a neighbour to walk with. My garden survived in part despite terrible drought and really the ... Fri, 24 Jun 2016 15:00:36 EST Day 66 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6161467 It's a waltze... a box step. A few steps in the wrong direction then a few steps in the right direction. <em>350</em> <BR> <BR> Boy, at times I feel actually graceful because I can relax and know I am doing the right thing. Yesterday was LOVELY. I mowed lawn, pulled weeds and gathered leaves. All slowly and with intention. I walked the dog along the river. I sipped water. I nibbled on chicken and crunched vegetables. Oh... I was sore by the end of the day but in a good healthy w... Thu, 12 May 2016 11:27:23 EST