JUSTYNA7's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=JUSTYNA7 JUSTYNA7's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Time to break out of the cocoon? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5920814 Yesterday my meditation threw me off balance and I found myself facing a different direction. The theme was crossing the ocean and how the waves can make it so you can't see very far. It might hurt and be uncomfortable but you know you are heading to safety. I'm paraphrasing... but it brought back a memory of being in a large boat whale watching on the St. Lawrence. From our vantage point we could see the many types of whales and the shore. In fact from up there we could remark on how th... Fri, 1 May 2015 12:36:12 EST The negative power of self centeredness... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5915737 I’ve been doing a meditation every day since January 1st with my neighbour and had the best meditation this morning. The theme was ... I should see if I can find the reading we did and quote the paragraph that stuck out for me... <BR> <BR> “...When thrown off centre, when old patterns return, when feeling exhausted or depressed, I so quickly become the exaggerated cause of all that is not right with the world..... <BR> “...I have to acknowledge the power of negative self centerednes... Wed, 22 Apr 2015 10:58:58 EST Me and my weight http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5915205 I've decided that I have to come to terms with never geting down to my original weight. I'm OK with that. After all, six pounds, eight ounces is not that realistic. Tue, 21 Apr 2015 13:53:56 EST Don't listen to the little voice! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5912350 If I hear something ten times..... <BR> <BR> It amazes me how many things I KNOW and forget. It is why reading blogs is so important. I slip so easily away from good habits. So I am reposting the following from what I wrote on a member's blog: <BR> <BR> Self hate does NOTHING to help us lose weight. Has it EVER worked for you? No, well then. Weight gain happens. It does. <BR> <BR> I have an eating disorder and when it is triggered it is hard to hit that off button because the butt... Thu, 16 Apr 2015 11:28:04 EST Who knows what new and exciting thing I will do/learn next! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5911770 "Mom has discovered the internet!"... no not my mother... me! My kids are having a great time kidding me as I figure out my new phone for texting and downloading music and as of today discovering apps. Yes, spark people, I now have the calorie and exercise app downloaded! I suppose it is never too late to learn and grow and shock my kids, lol <BR> <BR> Today I just want to celebrate. I watched MostMom1's latest vlog about changing the rules. You are so right on Shelly! I too am up from... Wed, 15 Apr 2015 11:29:53 EST Chair exercises and living on light http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5909261 I was reading Seaglass's blog from yesterday and it triggered a memory. The line going through my head from a blog I read a while ago is "when I can, I do when it comes to exercise" and I blogged about it. It's an attitude. And yet, I find myself shaking myself sometimes thinking "what am I still doing here?" because I am sitting at the computer or watching TV and hours have passed without moving... and then I get up and walk around the block or get in the pool and I think "why am I not d... Sat, 11 Apr 2015 07:49:17 EST Don't stop, ever! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5908895 Thanks Chris for your blog ... <BR> <BR> From 3 fat chicks on a diet: <BR> <BR> Dr. Peyton comments, “Every additional pound you carry equals <BR> 3 extra pounds of pressure on your hip joint, <BR> 4 extra pounds on your knee joint, <BR> and about 9 extra pounds on your patella femoral joint (which you use going up and down stairs, standing up, and getting off the toilet).” <BR> <BR> This is such a good reminder for me why I can't stop working at getting healthy. I know how hard ... Fri, 10 Apr 2015 12:29:27 EST Writing myself the right size http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5908278 I read Steph-knee's blog and thought... that is what I need, a blog vacation. And so I went to one of my spark teams to work on this week's discussion topic and of course found myself writing blog worthy thoughts. The topic in The Writing Diet team this week is trauma and we are asked in the book to write about incidents that we feel were traumatic for us... ten of them. This is what I wrote and what came out of my writing: <BR> <BR> Here is my problem with the topic this week: I was tra... Thu, 9 Apr 2015 11:50:30 EST On the edge of 100,000 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5907014 I'm making progress. Thank goodness I made a plan last week because as I look back I can see all the things I accomplished. Walks, swims, ST, good food choices. I know that every time I make a plan I am more likely to follow it than if I don't make a plan. Yes, things can happen to get me side tracked but even if my list has to carry over to the next day it is still a reminder that those were goals. <BR> <BR> Tomorrow is my birthday and I will reach, God willing, 100,000 points. As I w... Tue, 7 Apr 2015 10:43:04 EST Just getting my head together http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5903473 I need to be accountable. This was all triggered when I saw on my page that I hoped to reach my goal weight by this birthday... which is next week. In fact I am at a higher weight than I was when I set the goal which seemed reasonable at the time... but I did not know I was going to injure my knee and need a replacement. I need to feel like I am moving forward. <BR> <BR> My strengths and pros: <BR> 1. I like healthy foods and I am a good cook who knows a lot about nutritious menu planning... Wed, 1 Apr 2015 10:22:37 EST If I can, I do http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5902140 "Then I applied a rule I try to live by. When it comes to exercise, if I can, I do. " from AAACK's blog made me sit up straighter and read it again. What a great rule! <BR> <BR> So I did some ST! I also wrote down the ST moves for walkers that I could not remember. There are only 8 but I had gotten a couple wrong. I would like to start doing these regularly MWF. A long long time ago I did ST MWF and it was a great "habit". I feel ready to have a routine again. I spent much of the wee... Mon, 30 Mar 2015 08:20:05 EST 99,000 points and shedding layers! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5901173 I was noticing that my spark points are approaching 100,000. Wow! I may even hit that number by my birthday. That would be kind of cool. An incentive to put in a few more steps or activities between now and April 8. <BR> <BR> I am really grateful for the points. It IS motivating to try and get 25 points to do the bonus spin. And my choice of things to add up for points are what really help my program. Reading other people's blogs and commenting on team pages are how this all fits tog... Sat, 28 Mar 2015 12:11:27 EST A plan for today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5897962 Today.... <BR> <BR> I don't want to play computer games... <BR> <BR> I want to repeat yesterday... I did laps in the pool and laughed out loud because I was able to get in more laps than expected before guests got up... and I did a power lap as fast as I could without even thinking about it and it felt fantastic, heart pounding and muscles burning. I am loving my pool again. <BR> <BR> Food has been.... good? I indulged in a lot of foods like bread and pasta but I also insisted on salads ... Mon, 23 Mar 2015 07:54:25 EST How much water vs. how often you pee.... the answer http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5895909 Secret to water I learned from my kids who are lifeguards and wilderness trippers. If you drink more than a half cup of water it creates a large amount of pressure in your digestive system and pushes it's way through your system... not only making you pee a lot but also peeing out nutrients because they don't get a chance to absorb. The best analogy for me is what happens when you pour a lot of water into a very dry plant. You end up dehydrating because the water goes right though!. So the se... Thu, 19 Mar 2015 12:24:05 EST Yes I can... theme song for the special hockey international http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5895572 I volunteered tonight for the Special Hockey International 2015 Tournament. 72 teams from all over the world, all with intellectual challenges playing hockey for the fun of it. Hurray for the team from California and the team from England. What must it have been like for the families to bring their kids here to Ottawa Canada. Could they have imagined their children playing on an professional ice rink with a professional skating team encouranging them on? They showed a video at the openi... Wed, 18 Mar 2015 23:04:05 EST Justyna, Good Job! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5894013 "Of all the things I'd been skeptical about, I didn't feel skeptical about this: the wilderness had a clarity that included me. " Cheryl Stryed from "Wild" <BR> <BR> Read more: http://www.oprah.com/oprahsbookclub/Oprahs<BR>-Favorite-Quotes-from-Wild-by-Cheryl-S<BR>trayed#ixzz3UZXbJsr9 <BR> <BR> <BR> I have made a couple of references to the book "Wild". I know it is a book about a walk... but to me it parallels my journey towards getting healthy. I did diets and I battled an eating diso... Mon, 16 Mar 2015 14:15:58 EST Giving my metabolism a tweak... and motivating myself to get back on track! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5892183 I read a great article about giving your metabolism a kick start. I KNOW that a lot of my problem is about eating foods that I don't need right now... but I needed to feel like I would not be fighting a body that refused to budge even when I did start eating right again. There were 10 suggestions and as I read them I thought... "I can do that". I don't think I can remember them all but... <BR> <BR> 1. Start the morning with a cup of coffee or caffeinated tea. A study showed that women who ha... Fri, 13 Mar 2015 09:59:52 EST Keep moving forward http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5888708 We CAN do this. In my meditation time this morning I was talking about the "Wild" book and how at one point the author is literally counting her steps to keep going. One, two, three... to one hundred and starting again ... then when she gets too challenged she counts to fifty, then ten... and finally is done. It made me think of walking forward one hundred steps and how easily I can get distracted. I 'll think... I'll just rest, or visit this little side trip, or smell the roses... and I ... Sat, 7 Mar 2015 13:44:37 EST I choose to LIVE! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5886220 I am FREE today. <BR> <BR> I decided. I am free from compulsive eating. I am free from obsessing about food, overeating, undereating and night time snacking. <BR> <BR> I read a line in my meditaiton this morning that said (paraphrased) that when we "live" we have to go through some discomfort. It made me think about the times when I have chosen to stay home, say no to participating in something, or avoided taking a step towards something that needed doing. How often too did I use foo... Tue, 3 Mar 2015 11:44:26 EST March 1st http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5884853 This morning's meditation really hit home to me. It was about NOT doing things because we are afraid. And the example was not going to a show with friends because we are afraid we can't afford it. I have several unknown expenses coming up and I know I am pulling in the purse strings. It's a good thing to do. But there is a balance needed. I have to be careful not to be so frugal that I sacrifice relationships. What are things that are worth spending on for me? My harp lessons. Trips ... Sun, 1 Mar 2015 13:14:05 EST If relapse is an exercise of self loathing then starting over is an exercise of self love http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5884119 If relapse is an exercise of self loathing then starting over is an exercise of self love <BR> If relapse is an exercise of self loathing then starting over is an exercise of self love <BR> If relapse is an exercise of self loathing then starting over is an exercise of self love <BR> If relapse is an exercise of self loathing then starting over is an exercise of self love <BR> If relapse is an exercise of self loathing then starting over is an exercise of self love <BR> <BR> Practice self lo... Sat, 28 Feb 2015 08:35:54 EST Today, like every day is a new beginning http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5882924 This morning I am doing things in a different order. Shaking things up. I watched a video on spark people of a mother daughter team who committed to 100 days of going to the gym and it reminded me of how I used to feel when I first started spark people. How every day had so much potential. <BR> <BR> I feel ready! I feel like I can exercise (moderately) and eat clean and feel excited about it. Keep it simple! <BR> <BR> I have just a little pain in my knee this morning. Hurray! I can... Thu, 26 Feb 2015 07:09:48 EST Don't think about it http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5881789 A Glass of Red <BR> <BR> http://biggeekdad.com/2012/02/a-glass-of<BR>-red/ <BR> <BR> This (the above link) is what I aspire to someday in hula hooping, lol. I sure laughed watching the video. Hope it works in your links. <BR> <BR> This morning was a wonderful meditation and then reading some of Eckhart Tolle's "The Power of Now". The thought I am holding today is actually about not thinking. <BR> <BR> "Because you grew up thinking that you would cease to be if you stopped thinking... Tue, 24 Feb 2015 11:35:05 EST The party is not about me http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5880443 Today I have two parties to go to. In the distant past I would have tried to starve myself before going, or at least obsessed with what to wear to hide my body. And then once there I would have become a partial hostess trying to help look after the food. <BR> <BR> Today I had a moment of wishing that I had not regained some weight since my knee injury and then I slapped myself out of it. I have so much to be proud of. Some people will not have seen me for years and I know for myself I do... Sun, 22 Feb 2015 10:58:27 EST Look for the positive! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5879761 This morning I feel excited... like I used to when I first started this journey. Why? Because I don't feel alone. <BR> <BR> When you first start something there is potential and lots of new things. After a while it becomes so routine that it can become easy to ask yourself "why am I doing this? am I really getting anywhere? Is this what it is going to be like forever?" <BR> <BR> Like walking across a dessert. You look back now and can't see your starting place and you do NOT want to... Sat, 21 Feb 2015 07:45:24 EST Just another excuse? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5879305 I decided to cancel physio today because it is just too cold and to be honest I didni't feel like it. Now I am regretting it. The old me made a lot of excuses. I didn't have time, I was too tired, I had too much to do, it would take too long.... <BR> <BR> The meditation this morning I realized that part of my reason for canceling was self sabatoge. There was an issue that had seeded itself in my brain and I was totally oblivious to it, in certain denial until my meditation buddy pointed... Fri, 20 Feb 2015 10:19:26 EST I don't have to break it to fix it http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5878681 This morning there were two themes to the meditation. One was that we don't have to break things to fix them. That one really spoke to me. I think most of my "recovery" from my eating disorder has been tough. Hit bottom. Rip apart beliefs. Stomp on bad habits and then sweat and ache and labour at building up good ones. Yet since the beginning of the year I have seen something different happening. Just by showing love and attention and slowing down, things are changing. I'm making bet... Thu, 19 Feb 2015 10:18:27 EST Starting a 100 day countdown to not eat sugar http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5876287 After a difficult few weeks I allowed myself a day of rest yesterday. Yes, I know it was Valentine's and usually I would have a clean house, get up and make a special breakfast and plan some special meal, usually with friends over.... but I just didn't care. We watched movies and had toast and peanutbutter and apple butter and tea. We were watching Paddington at the time so it seemed quite appropriate. DH was super. He wore his sweats all day too. You have to remember we run a B&B so thi... Sun, 15 Feb 2015 17:11:29 EST Cutting my losses? It was a gain in so many ways... ah... I hope not literally! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5874644 Great news for those who have been praying for DD..... they got 2 "seizures" recorded at the hospital. I was not there when the docs came in to talk to her but they would like more information before making conclusions so they are keeping her in at least until tomorrow. <BR> <BR> I hope things go back to normal now. I have leftovers with salad planned for dinner. It will be -35 with windchill tomorrow when I have to go back to the hospital. It did not inspire good choices at the donut ... Thu, 12 Feb 2015 16:48:03 EST Keeping it simple http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5873069 Eat clean. No sugar or processed foods. Why trigger anything? Clean eating helps me think clearly and bores my food dragon. <BR> <BR> Help others. It's important to keep remembering why I do this.... how hard it used to be and how far I have come but how easy it is to give in. <BR> <BR> Move. Every step helps calm the food dragon and makes me feel alive. <BR> <BR> Drink water. I'm finding if I fill my cup as I leave then when I come back it is there waiting for me. <BR> <BR> The... Tue, 10 Feb 2015 09:13:15 EST The locked gate http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5872369 DN (Dear Neighbour) arrived promptly at 6:00 and poured herself coffee. I was able to choose an herbal tea then we shuffled into the pool area. We spent longer than usual chatting because both of us had a lot on our minds. My first response was to want to jump in and tell her to stand up for herself and stay strong keeping boundaries, say "NO!" when she told me what she is going through. But the whole point of our mornings is to meditate and find calm. As soon as the words started pourin... Mon, 9 Feb 2015 09:19:12 EST One cherry to taste the whole tree http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5871675 You can taste the whole tree by eating one cherry.... you don't have to take a bite out of every cherry. <BR> <BR> That was the theme for meditation with my neighbour this morning. <em>244</em> that we did it. It has been a 40 day commitment to date to get up every morning at 6:00 am and for her to trudge across the street in all her winter gear. It was a coffee morning. I was up past midnight sewing clothes for DD26 to wear at the hospital this week (everything has to have a zip or b... Sun, 8 Feb 2015 08:28:20 EST Love notes to me.... my second blog today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5870238 I decorated my front porch... I have a white Christmas tree out there so I put hearts on the door and then hearts on the tree with some pink ribbons and glitter spirals. My front hallway seemed to be the dumping ground for the glitter. It stuck to shoes, boots, socks... so now... my house is full of glitter. It is everywhere. I tried vaccuming it up but, hehehe, it likes the spaces between the tiles. It seems to think it is velcro or has super glue powers. <BR> <BR> It is the month of self l... Thu, 5 Feb 2015 19:13:09 EST Breath in.. breath out.. it's exercise, right? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5870230 No joke, breathing is exercise. <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/5/l1572282650.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Bur for some reason I forget to do it. <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/6/3/l631577798.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I have taken breathing for granted for too long. In fact a friend of mine gave me a framed picture of a woman underwater who is rising to the surface and underneath it says "one day she woke up and decided it was time to breath". I feel out of practice.... Thu, 5 Feb 2015 18:53:11 EST Taking my foot off the brakes http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5867029 Change is coming. I can feel it. <BR> <BR> I realized that Perfection is in the eye of the beholder. Success is self determined. It is me who set the limits. So what if I let go and allow things to happen? Take my foot off the brakes? <BR> <BR> My attitude can determine how I evalutate everything around me. My workout, my weight, the cleanliness of my house, the speed that I am getting a job done, the interactions with other people. What if.... my expectations are lower. I'm not ... Sun, 1 Feb 2015 09:27:17 EST A new place of balance http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5865090 Another morning meditation that was very thought provoking. Brrr.. it is cold out and I sure appreciate my neighbour braving the elements to come over. This morning was about... putting all of ourselves into our time in a relationship or all or ourselves into time on our own. I guess it was about being present and how when we commit we are able to "reach the unspoiled grotto". I am paraphrasing but it did make me think about how I often jump from one activity to another or multitask. Cer... Thu, 29 Jan 2015 09:29:51 EST Eat 10% less and Move 10% more http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5862825 Eat 10% less and Move 10% more. My night sabatoge eating team leader sent me this message and I thought, "oh why did I have such a big breakfast?" I decided to throw it into the tracker though and see the "damage". To my surprise I was low in calories. I was also low in fibre and protein and fat and right on track for carbs. It is not what I thought. <BR> <BR> Which is why I need the tracker. The simple logic of eating less can only happen when I know what I am eating. Besides, when ... Mon, 26 Jan 2015 09:42:50 EST Nurturing the little girl http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5862051 Day 24 doing morning meditations. I am surprised and delighted on so many levels. I wonder if I will be as dedicated when it is my turn to trudge across the street in frigid icy weather to my neighbour's at 6:00 am. She is... well... incredible. <BR> <BR> So this morning we were talking about the times we were swindled, cheated, tricked. Do you continue to trust people? Do you become a pessimist? Do you feel shame and hurt? I know for me there are times I live over and over in my head... Sun, 25 Jan 2015 08:46:08 EST Not 2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5860147 Apparently about 1400 years ago a wise sage in China had some annoying followers and he turned to them and simply said "not 2" <BR> <BR> In our meditation this morning we read the explanation. We are meant to be one. One whole. Not divided or split up. Funny because just before the reading we had been talking. Her husband had made some comments in front of people complaining about her housekeeping skills. I admitted the opposite because my husband would never say anything bad about me... Thu, 22 Jan 2015 09:36:44 EST A bunch of woo hoo non scale victories! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5859843 I have a lot of non scale victories to report today. <BR> <BR> 1. I have finished the bag of grapefruits DD bought for me. Funny NSV? Well, I do love grapefruit but I attach a diet stigma to them so I tend not to eat them on a regular basis. I have enjoyed a half grapefruit every morning for ten days now with no "diet" mentality. <BR> 2. I took DD out for lunch between appointments today and we decided on Subway salads. <BR> 3. Physio I went on the bike. Yup! True story. Maybe not ... Wed, 21 Jan 2015 21:15:04 EST The Power of Having other Women Friends http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5858737 Have you noticed that when you are talking with some women there is a power present? I have certainly experienced this. It can be in a negative way when women are complaining or putting people down... or in an incredibly positive way when they are trying to heal and change themselves. I think... our strength may strengthen each other. Our healing can heal each other. <BR> <BR> Whenever I can I like to be able to walk or prepare a meal or do something with my friends and family. It is ... Tue, 20 Jan 2015 12:24:41 EST Letter to Myself http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5857830 Today's meditation was about remembering who I am. The theme was,as humans we live lives of remembering and forgetting. When our lives are too fast, too hard, too chaotic... we forget. I spent time remembering, in meditation. Letting memories flood in, and it was painful. The bad memories always come first. But then I let the joyous ones flow over and it with that the knowldege that the good does not come without the bad. I am who I am because of the many moments in my life that moulde... Mon, 19 Jan 2015 10:59:48 EST Ready to move forward! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5855748 My meditation buddy is sick right now but I dragged myself out of bed anyways and made my way to my usual spot. I read several bits that all seemed to tie together. <BR> -it's not the big moments that really count... it is the tedious, tiresome daily ones that add up <BR> -the people in our lives are there to teach us, or there for us to teach.... whether it is patience or joy, or that we are not alone.... so for today look at each interaction as a possibility <BR> -nothing happens by accid... Fri, 16 Jan 2015 11:48:05 EST Breath in Serenity and Breath out Fear http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5852474 A simple meditation today - breath in Serenity and breath out Fear. It was a very powerful exercise this morning. I realized that I put a lot of effort into reinforcing my crutch instead of buidling on my foundation. Today I will move forward with confidence. I plan to do the breathing exercise again around 5:00. I feel like it is exactly what I need today. Mon, 12 Jan 2015 08:50:47 EST Not grabbing at the water any longer... learning to "swim"...ie. eat clean http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5849341 I managed to take down some of the Christmas ornaments this morning. I can't reach the star or get the lights off at the top and of course I won't be able to get the tree outside. It is a day of small victories and realizing my limits. Asking for help. <BR> <BR> Yesterday I discussed with physio my pain. A lot appears to be muscle spasms. And guess what? That comes from doing too much. I am pushing too hard. In yesterday's meditation the theme was very much about looking after myself... Thu, 8 Jan 2015 09:42:46 EST Second blog today... realizing what I can do http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5846392 I was commenting on a blog this morning and realized I wanted to save my thoughts... so here is today's second blog. My friend was noting that her blog from last year had the same goals as the one she had just written... and she had not seen any change...so this is what I wrote: <BR> <BR> Yup, blogging is great. And there is nothing wrong with looking back at a blog from a year ago and thinking you are in the same place. You may be... but things around you have changed. I remember getting f... Mon, 5 Jan 2015 08:20:34 EST This morning I am enough http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5846379 Another meditation morning. Sometimes what is old is new again. I had grapefruit tea... different. My neighbour likes her coffee and I like waking up to the smell of it... and have my cup later with breakfast. It is so cold out today so I am grateful that she is still committed to coming over. At least this morning as we were finishing the sun was beginning to rise. It's still special though, meeting in the dark and quiet and lighting our oil lamps and reading out loud together. <BR> ... Mon, 5 Jan 2015 08:01:44 EST A squished up old sea sponge http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5845693 I had the best sleep this morning. It has been a while since I have slept past 2 hours and I got 3 hours. I feel like a new person! Not that I can't doze during the day. It happens. <BR> <BR> Today I worked hard on my physio and then worked a bit on my other knee because it would really nice not to whip kick as I climb stairs. Nope, it does not bend enough. I had thought that it was impossible to get more flexions from that knee, that I had missed the "window" but my physio seems to ... Sun, 4 Jan 2015 14:09:47 EST Going sugar free, just for today? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5844625 Day 3 of meditation. Being Saturday I was not sure my neighbour would come... but as I poured my tea I heard the front door open and click shut. I said I would light the outdoor Christmas tree as a sign I was up. Our house is very active sometimes but you would never know from the front. The dog is now used to her so gave happy greetings and fortunately did not bark as everyone else was asleep. I've let her start the habit of choosing her own mug. We have a large assortment and I've alw... Sat, 3 Jan 2015 10:58:54 EST The reward for Meditation today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5843646 As some of you know, my neighbour and I have started a daily meditation together. She is right across the street, but hey, this is Canada and it is COLD! We agreed to meet at 6:00 am every morning and do a reading together then have 10 minutes of silent meditation, a bit of time to reflect, then on with our days being done and out the door by 7:00 am. I felt like I was doing this for her. It was her request and her goal. It seemed pretty unrealistic for me to get much out of it. I just ... Fri, 2 Jan 2015 08:30:23 EST