JAVA286's SparkPeople Blog JAVA286's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Hi strangers! I've got am update! I know, I disappeared again. Wedding planning and school are time consuming! But I will be graduating next month (having maintained straight A's I might add!) and the wedding is on May 10! <BR> <BR> I have been working out like crazy and really tracking my food successfully for the first time long term. I haven't lost pounds :( BUT I have lost TEN INCHES since 2/22 (my last dress fitting)!!! I havent counted my total inches lost, I'm waiting until May to do that. <BR> <BR> I've been doing... Sat, 19 Apr 2014 09:12:11 EST PH Balance? Huh? My weight seems to have jumped up two pound outs of no where. I know.. two pounds is probably just fluctuation...but its been a few days and my weight doesn't really fluctuate much. I haven't changed anything except my stress level and MORE exercise. This is so frustrating..why can't I ever see any results? I eat better than ever and exercise on a regular basis (longer than ever) with nothing to show for it. <BR> <BR> I heard a little something about how your body's PH can affect your weig... Sun, 9 Jun 2013 18:13:56 EST I am back! Updates Hey strangers! A lot has changed since I was here last (except my weight. sigh). <BR> <BR> I am STUCK at this weight but I am still working out at least. Booze is still the problem, I am re-reading that awesome book that helped me quit last time. I lost my job (our company got bought) and I started school full time :). I am studying business and I really enjoy it! <BR> <BR> I have ran a regular 5K, the Dirty Girl Mud Run 5K, and the Run For Your Lives 5K (the zombie one!) since I was on he... Wed, 5 Jun 2013 09:16:38 EST Better Mood! And Motivated! Tomorrow is weigh in day and I have not lost a pound this whole month. I have been working out like crazy though so I am hoping to have lost at least one inch. I drank a lot more than I should have this month. Still, a lot less that before my AF free month. When this problem started, I was drinking an entire (LARGE) bottle of whiskey at least once a week (and that isn't counting the beer). The worst was in 2008. This month was a "bad month" and I only got drunk twice..big improvement! Still, ... Thu, 28 Feb 2013 09:51:37 EST Why Can't I Shake This Bad Mood?! I don't know why I am so irritable and grumpy this week! It is driving me nuts! I am feeling frustrated with working out. I don't feel like I am getting enough but when I do extra, I have awful hip pain. I went to the doctor for this when I had health insurance and he was useless. I'd really like to start the 30 Day shred again..but last time my hips got really messed up. I am only 26..why is this an issue?! And I love my running buddy but she is holding me back big time. So while we run 4 ti... Tue, 19 Feb 2013 11:02:08 EST New Revelations and Yoga Chaos At some point in this short year, my goal has completely shifted from "I want to lose weight and look better" to "I want to be strong and amaze myself with what my body can do". I feel so much regret right now. I wish I would have done more in high school. Regrets are toxic, I know. I am trying to move past it now. I just missed out on a so much thanks to my panic disorder and depression. I see now why parents force kids to do sports. Now I am nearing 30 and I should be at my peak fitness lev... Mon, 18 Feb 2013 15:46:13 EST Encouraging Measurements Day! Huge Surprise! Today, I did my monthly measurements and official weigh in. I was sorta looking forward to it because I FEEL so much ..leaner? My posture is better automatically so I assumed that was the cause. I only lost 2 pound this entire month so I wasn't expecting much. <BR> <BR> Last month, I lost 6 pounds and 2 inches. I was super happy about it, those 2 inches were the most I have ever lost! And I have NEVER lost pounds before. But this month, I lost only 2 pounds..and SIX INCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... Fri, 1 Feb 2013 08:50:28 EST Booze Updates and Happy Workouts Hey strangers! I thought I should stop by :). I have had a busy month so far and an awesome one at that! Last night, my nephew called me on video chat because he had a picture to show me. The picture was an ultrasound picture!!!!!!!!!!! I cried my eyes out! That little boy means the world to me and now I am getting another nephew or niece! My fiance's sister is about to have a little girl too so I will get TWO nieces and or nephews this year! <BR> <BR> OK so the booze. I wasn't great about ... Tue, 29 Jan 2013 10:10:36 EST 30 Days AF Results and Thoughts I did attempt to post a blog the other day but the Internet ate it. <BR> <BR> Ok so I did it! 30 Days AF! I am surprised that I did it and now, I don't want to go back (but more on that later). So here are the results! The following results are just from cutting out alcohol. I did not intentionally change my diet and I actually worked out less due to the holidays. I lost 6 pounds and 2.5 inches! 2.5 inches is huge for me, I did P90 for 2 months a while back and only lost .5 inches! I have RE... Wed, 2 Jan 2013 10:16:50 EST 28 Days Sober and ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!! Hey strangers! Its been a busy couple of days but I am still booze free! AND boyfriend proposed on 12/20!!!!!! I am sooooo excited!! Good motivation to work out too :). We are thinking May 2014 for the wedding..which seems like a long time away but we will need that time to save up some money. I didn't get to go to prom...I am going ALL OUT for this wedding! I want to feel pretty for once! <BR> <BR> The bad news is, someone is trying to buy our company so there is a chance I will lose ... Thu, 27 Dec 2012 10:02:40 EST Day 13 AF! Also, Negative Nancys and Coffee YAY Day 13!! I am so happy...I feel like it is getting easier and easier. I am to the point where I don't even think about it anymore! I was missing my beer with dinner (not the being drunk part) but I have grown to like iced tea :). I'm feeling great, most of the withdraw junk is gone. My anxiety disorder stuff as really calmed down and my headaches and nausea are mostly gone. I did have a nightmare, which I read was a common symptom. It could have just been random but I rarely have nightmar... Wed, 12 Dec 2012 09:49:11 EST I did it! One week sober! Also, Woo Hoo!!! I did it! Let me tell you about my day yesterday. I went to a bar and grill that I use to get hammered at about twice a week. I got dinner and diet coke! Normally, I don't drink diet coke because of the did NOT taste good, won't be doing that again! <BR> <BR> So then I went to the local bar with some friends. This is the bar I feel very comfortable in so, of course, I use to get hammered here also. Well I didn't drink at all! And my friends did! They tried to get me... Fri, 7 Dec 2012 10:44:26 EST On Day 7 AF and Going Strong! Today will be day 7 without alcohol and I am feeling amazing! A few times, I thought I was craving beer but as soon as I realized I was just craving something fizzy, I drank Club Soda with fruit mixed in and the craving disappeared! Every time I think of wanting alcohol, I simply ask myself "Why?" and it snaps me right back to not wanting it. That process takes about half of one second. I feel I don't have to schedule my social life around hangovers, which was a pretty big burden be... Thu, 6 Dec 2012 10:46:34 EST No More Booze!? So Happy I Can't Stand It! WARNING: There may be an excessive use of !'s because I am so happy! <BR> <BR> Some CRAZY happened to me! I was getting really upset about my recent weight gain (despite my 5k training) and I hopped on to Amazon to find a book to help me stop drinking. I am a self help book junkie, I always seem to walk away with something positive that changes my life. I know a lot of people hate them but I think those people do not read with an open mind! They have saved my relationship, my life (first cle... Mon, 3 Dec 2012 10:47:11 EST Ok..Now I am gaining inches AND weight... I have never been so discouraged. Its like, the more I try, the more I gain. I thought my new extra weight was muscle since I am working out even harder than ever. We run about 4-5 days a week and do strength once or twice a week. I am about to give up. It seems when I do, at least I don't gain weight. I am getting really depressed..I literally have never lost ANY weight and I have been trying for years. If I keep gaining at this rate, I am going to be seriously overweight by the time I am 30... Mon, 19 Nov 2012 13:29:06 EST Im back! P90 and Zombie 5k I have been hiding from you guys. I have been feeling pretty down, November marks 1 year since I have been desperately trying to lose weight. I weigh more now than ever :(. However...I lost 1 inch and my other measurements stayed the same so at least the extra fat is muscle, not fat. I only gained about 5lbs but that sure is discouraging that I am not losing any pounds after a year of working out and 2 of clean eating. <BR> <BR> I did P90 for 30 days and lost NOTHING. I got a bunch of muscl... Sat, 3 Nov 2012 10:37:03 EST Still around..same ol same ol Well, I was bad AGAIN. I made the mistake of getting a liquor bottle to keep in the house..that was DUMB. Its gone now of course. It brought up a lot of feelings. I was surprised that I acted completely the same as I did when I was drinking WAY too much when mom was sick. Here I thought I made progress. Ok, I know I have made progress since I have no desire to go out anf get a new bottle. It felt like I was SUPPOSE to drink it since it was in the house. I didn't get drunk on it except maybe t... Fri, 20 Jul 2012 14:50:15 EST Eat to Live is Going Better Than Expected! Also, Willpower! I am surprised at how easy it is to eat according to Eat to Live. I thought it would be a lot harder but I guess I did have a bit of a head start. I'll admit, I am not doing it 100% but I am getting so many veggies and fruits! And I feel awesome! I do still have coffee in the AM and I am still struggling with the booze but I have been able to keep it to 2 to 3 beers a night (instead of 7!). I also have small amounts of meat some times. I am really enjoying the salad because of all the good st... Tue, 10 Jul 2012 12:37:45 EST This is more like it! Ok, I feel much better today, pity party over! I think you have to have them sometimes! I think I just needed a good dose of sunshine :). <BR> <BR> I started the Eat To Live lifestyle a bit more hard core today (now that the power is back and the grocery stores are open!). I started off with the Eat Your Veggies smoothie..thingy for breakfast. I was wasn't that bad! It's not pretty to look at but it was a good feeling knowing I was eating all those fruits and veggies :). <BR> ... Sun, 8 Jul 2012 15:55:30 EST Off the Wagon. Again. I am feeling pretty discouraged. I cannot stick with anything, mostly because I never see ANY results. I joined Spark People under a different name years ago.. I have never lost more than 2 pounds and those always come back eventually. <BR> <BR> What is sooo aggravating is that this weight would be gone if I could just stop drinking! I have been drinking a whole bunch this past week for some reason. I am talking like 10 beers (at 100 calories a beer) in a night. My tolerance is back Sat, 7 Jul 2012 10:44:57 EST Back From The Beach Back from the way too short vacation :(. We had a great time though and I caught the bouquet ;). It was nice to have a romantic weekend. He works all weekends so it was a treat to spend that much time together. We went to the 88s Piano Bar both nights..we loooove that place! I guess my sinuses did not appreciate the climate change because I woke up with a sore throat and cough. Blah. Guess I should just go back and stay there ;) <BR> <BR> I actually missed my workouts while I was there. I am... Mon, 25 Jun 2012 10:08:08 EST Going to the Beach Tomorrow! I am SO ready to go to the beach. I am bummed we can only stay 3 days but I refuse to focus on that or anything else negative during this trip (long story..I am in a wedding). <BR> <BR> So yesterday something really crazy happened...I found a swimsuit that I actually feel comfortable wearing in public. This may not seem like a big deal but I have avoided pools (which I LOVE) since I was in high school because I am so self conscious in a bikini. And back in high school, I was 110 lbs! SO muc... Thu, 21 Jun 2012 11:33:41 EST Backstory I have been on Spark People for a while but have decided to start a new, much more anonymous account. I will be more honest and involved this way. <BR> <BR> I have been trying SO HARD to lose this weight! It just wont budge. I will not give up though! <BR> <BR> This is not food weight...this is beer weight. I am very controlled with food, never had a problem with it. I eat as much whole, non-processed foods as I can. I started doing that in August of 2011. I didn't lose weight but I feel m... Mon, 18 Jun 2012 15:21:32 EST