IRP1114's SparkPeople Blog IRP1114's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Refocusing. Choosing happy today. Happy Friday Sparkies <em>30</em> Yes. I am smiling and choosing happy today. I refuse to wait for something or someone to make me happy. Happiness comes from within not from external sources. Even though there are many external things that can rob us of that happy place inside us, it is still our choice to let it keep us down or move on and focus on something else. So as simple as it sounds to just choose to be happy in the middle of this nightmare (as many have actually called our curr... Fri, 18 Dec 2015 14:42:37 EST Not myself these days. Hello sparkies. Really miss you all. As hard as I try to stay centered and be myself I honestly am far from my normal happy/positive self. I would love to come on here and blog all kinds of happy positive motivating things... But most of what is taking over my life are sad depressing things. I really don't want to bring anyone down with all the details. I'm crying just holding it all in. Mainly I miss having a husband I can talk to and share the load of our current stresses with, but honestl... Thu, 17 Dec 2015 17:46:38 EST Updates Hello sparkies I'm sorry I have not updated much. Things are better. Complicated but better. I hate to complain and I think that's why I haven't taken the time to post. But aside from he fact that the hubby is obviously the one who experienced all the pain and has to deal with all of the remaining effects of his accident, I know I am he one who has suffered the most in all of this. I work really hard to keep all of this in through out the days that blogging about it would be letting too... Thu, 26 Nov 2015 18:12:37 EST Back home. Not easier... I said before the hardest thing was re living it. Now that doesn't seem as bad/difficult to deal with as I see my boys struggle with the current issues. <BR> <BR> Last night was actually a little better and it gave me hope but the nights before I spent comforting the boys while they cried at bed time feeling like they miss their dad as they know him. To them at moments he is a completely different person. <BR> <BR> It's really heart breaking because it is very difficult for them to understa... Wed, 30 Sep 2015 01:13:29 EST One of the hardest things Has been re living that night over and over. With his memory being the most effected having to tell him what happend to him so many times has been very hard on me. Luckily the last few days I have only had to tell him once or twice. But before that I was telling him 10 or more times every day since the day after his fall on the 7th. Not only him but everyone in the family, his and mine who asks what happend. And of course doctors and other hospital staff... I feel very strange when I don't ... Fri, 25 Sep 2015 23:33:59 EST Steps in the right direction Yesterday he got admitted into intensive therapy. Finally : ) There was a few mix ups and waiting on insurance but it got done. So that is a very good step in the right direction. It's not easy getting a very independent man who likes his privacy even from me at times to do a bunch of silly things in front of complete strangers but I am doing what I can to keep him calm and keep reminding him why he is here and why he has to so these things. Things like brushing his teeth while the occupatio... Tue, 22 Sep 2015 16:57:03 EST Not letting anxiety take over <img src=""> I was very upset when I posted that last blog. Felt myself heading toward an anxiety attack but I managed to calm myself down. I just had to make myself snap out of it an focus on all the positives. I have cried all kinds of tears. Tears of fear sadness frustration anger and more as more each day I get to experience a few tears of joy. Like the first day in ICU when he opened his eyes a few seconds a... Sat, 19 Sep 2015 17:16:05 EST I'm falling apart The doctors will not let him go home until he does intensive therapy. Witch he might not even be ready for yet. They say he isn't ready to handle 3hrs yet because of how tiered he still is. But they are working on getting him admitted because it might take up to a wk to get in anyw. I just don't know :..( Thu, 17 Sep 2015 13:46:11 EST Over a week in the hospital so far Thank you for all of your kind and thoughtful coments and encouragement on my recent blogs about my hubby. <BR> <BR> We are still here. Things are progressing slowly. Good news is his blood work is coming up more normal now as far as potassium and sodium. And the test they sent to the UW to check the fluid in his ear to make sure it isn't spinal fluid came back and it isn't. So that's good. No procedure necessary. <BR> He slept most of the night pretty well with Tylenol only. Another good i... Wed, 16 Sep 2015 19:57:56 EST A little more Posted update blog about DH's accident earlier. Didn't want to lose what I had already typed so I went ahead and posted when I couldn't keep writing. <BR> <BR> He has 13 staples on the back of his head and he fractured a part of his skull right behind his left year and there is a small fracture on his back low close to the tail bone but very minimal. <BR> <BR> There is a big dark bruise behind his ear and it's a little swollen but the good thing is nothing was damaged in his ear as far as t... Sun, 13 Sep 2015 03:19:49 EST Update Wish my first blog all year was the complete opposite kind of update and was here to chat about starting the new school year and my first few days of having all three boys in school... But it isn't. I (we DH as well) missed my third and last kid's first day of kindergarden. And a few hours ago his first goal in his very first soccer game. Lots of little things that break my heart to miss and are bittersweet moments to enjoy by pictures and messages from them. I realized I never said what ... Sat, 12 Sep 2015 20:23:49 EST Keep Calm and Love Your Body I was listening to this podcast a few weeks back that I found on a cool Marathon training podcast show I found that I found very interesting in many ways. This one on body image I feel is something many of us can relate too even if we don't run marathons regularly. <BR> <BR> Here is the link to the article where you can also find the podcast. It really got me thinking more. I was recently finding myself equally dissatisfied with my body at 118 weighing in at "goal weight". 118 a recent goal... Tue, 27 May 2014 19:40:38 EST So there IS a word for it! A word to describe what we are leaning towards when we let ourselves get obsessive with our own versions of "healthy eating" ... <BR> <BR> <BR> orthorexia <BR> <BR> Here is an article about it. <BR> <link><BR>g-clean-vs-orthorexia </link> <BR> <BR> Blog #2 for me today but I had to share this since I was kind of noticing a bit of this in my self after my last blog thinking of how I felt about eating out! <BR> <BR> EDIT <BR> need a place to keep thes... Wed, 16 Apr 2014 15:33:34 EST Motivation Had to share this! <BR> <BR> <link> </link> <BR> <BR> I know many Sparkers have a fitbit already! Hope some of you can join this! <BR> <BR> Happy April 1st Spakies <em>213</em> Tue, 1 Apr 2014 16:28:23 EST Week 1 of 12 review Week one is behind me and I am realizing I did not do much to really get myself back in "progress mode" aside from simply starting to track everything. Sigh. I guess I have to take that as a positive. I started and well its a start! <BR> <BR> I failed at cutting out sugar for most days of the week. Only had one day I can say I was completely sugar free. As for the extended fasts I did really good though so there we go another plus lol! (yea I am trying really hard to find the positives here)... Mon, 13 Jan 2014 15:58:54 EST Breaking the sugar habit always easier said than done... Need motivation? (video link) I know I DO! <BR> <BR> I was getting info together to review week one and I realized the biggest failure was the sugar. <BR> <BR> The one thing that really makes all the difference in this and I totally failed on it. Instead of going 6 days sugar free I think I ended up with one! Did the opposite of what I intended to do. <em>198</em> <BR> <BR> I will post the week one review blog later. For now I thought I would share this link. <BR> <BR> <link> ... Mon, 13 Jan 2014 13:08:03 EST 2013 weigh ins Updating page so I needed a place to put these numbers : )! Will come back and add more to this blog at a later time. <BR> <BR> 2013 Weigh ins <BR> Weight / waist / lean mass weight / body fat percentage / fat pounds <BR> <BR> Jan #122.9lbs / 28 / 95.25lbs / 22% / 27.65lbs# <BR> 1/5-121.5 <BR> 1/12-117.9 <BR> 1/20-120.9 <BR> 1/26-122 <BR> <BR> Feb#121lbs /27in / 95.59lbs / 21% / 25.41lbs# <BR> 2/2 -121.1 <BR> 2/9-121 <BR> 2/16-119.6 <BR> 2/23-120.2 <BR> <BR> March#120.5 / 26.5in / ... Thu, 9 Jan 2014 11:52:51 EST Back to routines! (plus a link) and some pics : ) Like most people, I did manage to gain back some weight over the holidays. Not proud but I am not beating myself up over it either. Just jumping back into routines so I can get my mind and body back into progress mode! <BR> <BR> In my last blog I was determined not to gain again.... At first I did okay but after Christmas I started doing really bad with food. At least when it comes to portions, not snacking and too much sugar! Did even worse after NY! We had way too much food and treats in t... Tue, 7 Jan 2014 13:36:58 EST Goals updates NSVs Completed my first half on Sunday <em>244</em> <BR> <BR> Here I am nearing the finish line with my friend Kim. <BR> <img src=""> <BR> It was super fun. Can't wait to do it again! <BR> We are thinking we might be doing the full marathon next year : )! <BR> <BR> I can ramble on for about it all. But I will try to keep it short! Time was not important to me/us. We did it for fun. Only goal was to not walk and we did just that. Over al... Wed, 4 Dec 2013 16:30:09 EST 30 days of tracking Day 1 of 30 days of tracking <BR> <BR> 15hr night fast. <BR> Mid day workout before lunch. <BR> 1627Calories 125Carbs 36Fiber 94Fat 91Protein <BR> 49.6%Fat 29.2%Carbs 21.2%Protein <BR> <BR> Day 2 <BR> <BR> Fasted cardio 16hr fast <BR> 1560 Calories 114Carbs 36Fiber 96Protein <BR> 47.6% Fats 28.4%Carbs 24%Protein <BR> <BR> Day 3 <BR> <BR> 13hr night fast <BR> Rest day <BR> 2019 Calories 193Carbs 33Fiber 91Fat 127Protein <BR> 38.9%Fat 36.8%Carbs 24.1%Protein <BR> Not too bad for an "off/... Mon, 4 Nov 2013 18:30:48 EST Today's trail run in pics : ) I decided to take my camera with me since it was just gorgeous out this morning! I knew today's trail run would be worth sharing <em>30</em> <BR> <BR> A little cold and windy. So as usual I bundled up! <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=" Mon, 28 Oct 2013 17:07:27 EST Eggs So as I just updated on my feed. Dr says I am not allergic to anything. As a kid I was allergic to eggs. The last time I remember eating them I was probably 8 so what is that... 24 almost 25 years now! (I broke out in hives needed a shot. It was by accident. It was in fried rice at a party) So it will be fun adding such a great food into my diet. We get organic eggs delivered weekly for the rest of the family so looks like I might need to increase our delivery amount now : ) <BR> <BR> Please... Mon, 9 Sep 2013 22:04:57 EST Food and yard work pics I am going strong on day 6 here. Any other time I would be using the long weekend as an excuse to not be so focused... But not this time : )! <BR> <BR> Staying with my basic plan as previously posted keeping it simple but focused. As always the first few days with re sparked motivation are easy but as the days go on it does get a little tougher. Yesterday was a challenge for sure with hunger levels and other things like going to the movies in the morning with the boys. I took my own snacks a... Thu, 4 Jul 2013 19:41:14 EST Not stressing it. Just doing it! FIRST TIME EVER. I started on a Saturday lol! So here I am Monday on day THREE! <BR> <BR> I stuck to my plan this weekend and did not give in to the hubby offering me drinks. (Even though he had agreed not to offer!!!) <BR> <BR> He was like "Its Sunday just relax and have one"... Later "common try this one" (made a mojito) <BR> <BR> I seriously had no desire to drink. I already felt super thirsty from the temps being so high that I couldn't stop drinking ice water. Probably had half gallo... Mon, 1 Jul 2013 13:30:37 EST Another 21 days! My current plan... Okay so I mentioned in my last blog I would be starting a 21 day challenge to re start progress mode again since I still have not made much progress all year. <BR> <BR> As I mentioned in my anxiety lack of progress blog <BR> <link><BR>urnal_individual.asp?blog_id=5373797 </link> <BR> <BR> So now that things are a little more calm around here and my mind set is back in the "I can do it" zone, I decided to start another little 21 day challenge that star... Tue, 11 Jun 2013 19:14:34 EST I don't want to obsess but I do want to feel good! Spark is not the problem. I started missing it just thinking about leaving yesterday lol! <BR> <BR> I have been letting myself get obsessive about this in some ways. <BR> <BR> That stops today! This is day one of a less obsessive me <em>211</em> <BR> <BR> Instead of starting the day stepping on the scale, the first time I heard the little birds chirping outside my window I stepped outside! <BR> <BR> Did a few stretches, warmed up running up and down the steps, did a couple min of jum... Tue, 4 Jun 2013 08:37:46 EST Anxiety/Questioning my self/ Half of the year and not much progress, but grateful : ) I am always questioning myself/ doubting myself. When it comes to the plan I chose and or if I can or not reach my goals. <BR> <BR> Even though lately I have been highly motivated and exited with my new "plan" with detox....., <BR> <BR> link to blog with plan <BR> <link><BR>urnal_individual.asp?blog_id=5350221 </link> <BR> (I restarted this with the goal of 2 weeks "on" again on Tuesday) <BR> <BR> Inside (and even more so on rough days. Like today) ... Fri, 31 May 2013 15:14:10 EST Link to mini challenge from Bob Harper Have you done these yet? I just had to share <em>30</em> <BR> <BR> There a few good ones like this. I did them after my cardio today along with a few other ones and some of my own stuff. <BR> <BR> <BR> <link> </link> <BR> <BR> Got my calorie burn up to over 1600 from just workouts today. I am up over 10,000 fitness min for the year now by the way! I will be meeting my year goal for sure ; ) <BR> Feeling good about kicking it up for summer. Are yo... Wed, 29 May 2013 17:14:06 EST Happy Friday : )! We got the tree in. (Pictures) Had to share since I mentioned it in my blog earlier! <BR> <BR> This morning <BR> <img src=""> <BR> Now <BR> <img src=""> <BR> I love it even more now lol! <BR> <img src=""> <BR> We think it is a cherry tree. Hubby saved it from going to the dump after it was removed at a construction site. <BR> <img src=" Fri, 24 May 2013 17:13:53 EST Letting go of the all or nothing... So this week I have really been working on not being so all or nothing. It is a hard thing to do. I know I have done this a lot in the past. <BR> <BR> Like last week! Ugh. Last week was such a struggle.... I so wish I could have balanced it better and not gained back everything I lost while being so good : ( <BR> <BR> Thankfully it is mostly with my diet but sometimes with workouts too as in just going way over board and doing too many super long workouts in one week instead of keeping the... Fri, 24 May 2013 11:06:49 EST Tracking/ Ultimate goal part 1 So yesterday I ended up tracking all my food for yesterday just to look at the numbers and I think I will just keep not tracking for a while. I can see I am eating the same as I would not doing detox and still getting enough protein too so I will just keep trying to limit the nuts and extra fruit when I can but otherwise I don't think there is much more I can do. <BR> <BR> That is not much more I am willing to do.... I just refuse to let myself risk being impatient with my boys or anyone fo... Wed, 22 May 2013 12:23:42 EST Detox goals/ week goals/ emotional eating and my crazy fat days/ Plus pics of 8k Yea long title lol! Been meaning to blog for a few days now. Last blog I was feeling a little down about my lack of self control and eating off plan... <BR> <BR> I think I let my emotions/stress with little situations get the best of me and just kind of gave up. <BR> <BR> That Thursday I ended up having a spontaneous night out with the hubby. Good and bad. But mostly good. <BR> <BR> I mean we need our time that is for sure! With three boys it is very hard to even start a conversation some... Tue, 21 May 2013 14:30:28 EST Feeling a litle slump So poor planning and underestimating my lack of self control around one of my favorite treats led to me failing to stick to my detox plan again. <BR> <BR> Sigh. <BR> <BR> At least this time I did not feel as guilty about it because I actually wanted to eat this! It was pancakes... Boys request. <BR> <BR> Started out the day great showing 1 pound loss after the 2 pound gain from Sunday, even though it was day one of tom! So that was really good to see. Hardly ever lose any bloat this week... Thu, 16 May 2013 14:37:42 EST Super-Gluten in American Wheat/Much better today : ) American strains of wheat have a much higher gluten content (which is needed to make light, fluffy Wonder Bread and giant bagels) than those traditionally found in Europe. This super-gluten was recently introduced into our agricultural food supply and now has “infected” nearly all wheat strains in America. <BR> Link to a short video on gluten and its effects <BR> <link><BR>g-gluten-free-save-your-life </link> <BR> <BR> More motivation to stay away from... Tue, 14 May 2013 13:50:07 EST Preservatives & our Metabolism/Restarting Detox More from Cleanse Your Body Clear Your Mind <BR> <BR> "Preservatives <BR> <BR> Chemicals are often used to keep foods fresh for long periods of time. These preservatives are made from potent antioxidants that slow down the metabolic process that naturally continues even after fresh foods are packaged. The preservatives act as agents that prevent mold and bacteria from growing because they inhibit their cellular function. However, when we eat foods with preservatives they can directly interf... Mon, 13 May 2013 18:16:38 EST Why Detox? From Cleanse Your Body, Clear Your Mind by Jeffrey A Morrison M.D. <BR> <BR> "Despite our best intentions, each of us continues to ingest tiny amounts of chemicals every day, and they are making us sick. The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) estimates that there are more than twenty thousand different types of chemicals that our bodies cannot metabolize. In fact, our bodies have become repositories for the thousands of compounds that have invaded our air, water, and food supplies: <BR> ... Thu, 9 May 2013 12:37:59 EST Basics of current detox plan I am still reading through a stack of detox books I picked up from the library but for now this is what I have set my mind on doing for the rest of the month of May. <BR> <BR> Daily minimum list <BR> <BR> 2 servings of Crucifers (1/2 cup cooked or 1 cup raw) cabbage, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, broccoli, broccoli sprouts <BR> <BR> 2 servings of Green Leafy Vegetables and Herbs (1/2cup cooked or 1 cup raw) Parsley, kale, watercress, chard, cilantro, beet greens, collards, escarole, dand... Wed, 8 May 2013 19:38:55 EST Some days... You just want to not even try! I have been doing so well lately. Feeling IN CONTROL like every day. Then I have a few bad days and it is like I just stop believing in myself all of a sudden. <BR> <BR> I can be thinking so clearly and see that finish line within reach and then the next day it seems like an impossible thing. <BR> <BR> Amazing what an upside down week and a bad night sleep can do to our heads. <BR> <BR> Sigh... Hubby is working nights again this week and Monday night I hardly slept. First because I just c... Wed, 10 Apr 2013 12:14:53 EST Good day streak ended... 27 days until 12k now! So I made it over 30 days I think it was 35 good days. I would say I had 30 real good days there. The other where just okay days... <BR> <BR> It ended yesterday. I had a few drinks with the hubby : ) Didn't even try to resist his invitation. I totally gave in and enjoyed a few extras with it as well. <BR> <BR> Started over this morning. I got a nice long run/walk outdoors by myself for a change lol! Left the big heavy stroller and the little guy with my sister. If felt great. The sun was ou... Mon, 25 Mar 2013 18:33:36 EST Saturday weigh in and reply to comments on tracker blog Last Sat 118.3 today 122.2. Of course I am up in weight! It is day 2 tom super bloated and holding on to extra fluids I am sure from my bottomless pit day on Wed. Also I have not been running at all in comparison to how I usually run so I am not getting my sweat on the way I like. <BR> <BR> I REALLY MISS MY RUNS! <BR> <BR> TMI but stuff on my mind. FEEL FREE TO SKIP AHEAD!!! <BR> So hard to not get super sensitive during tom when I don't run. Seriously. I am an emotional person. I get tear... Sat, 23 Mar 2013 12:47:24 EST Tracker notes. Calorie ranges. Learning from tracking. Trying lower carb. Since I shared in my status that yesterday barely qualified as a "good" day I thought I would share my tracker notes. Food tracker is shared. But I thought putting it all on one page could help me continue to learn from my tracking. <BR> <BR> (copied and pasted all my notes) <BR> Monday <BR> 2,198 128carb 129fat 153protein <BR> Goal for the day was to go grain free and eat no fruit to see how low carbs would be and how I felt. <BR> Was very surprised I was able to feel satisfied th... Thu, 21 Mar 2013 14:27:26 EST "Okay Superwoman" If I can share this anywhere I know this is the place! <em>246</em> <BR> <BR> I went to get a new battery for my truck this morning and when I walked out of Costco with battery in hand a guy asked me if he could get me a cart since he knew I had to carry it back to the back of the building where they had my truck to install it. When I said "no I got it" he replied "Okay Superwoman". <BR> <BR> They guys at the shop where equally impressed when I walked in they couldn't see it in my hand... Wed, 20 Mar 2013 19:52:10 EST I will be ready for spring : )! I just realized the last day of this 30 day challenge I set for myself of staying in my new "low calorie range" I set (along with 100% clean eating of course) will end just as spring begins! <BR> <BR> So cool lol! I didn't even plan on it. Now I can look forward to that finish line even more. Plus my mom's bday is on the 21st so we will likely be celebrating that weekend! Perfect! As I have no other big plans or commitments any time sooner. Just a few healthy ones like hikes and cooking som... Fri, 22 Feb 2013 16:25:26 EST Healthy does pay off : )! HAD TO SHARE THIS HERE. <BR> <BR> Just got call from our insurance company letting me know hubby's test results for his new life insurance rate... <BR> <BR> We will be SAVING $20 a MONTH for TWENTY YEARS! <BR> <BR> How cool is that!?! <BR> <BR> That is $20 less than just a healthy weight non smoker would pay for the life insurance he has. Yep. Our insurance agent said he doesn't remember anyone ever qualifying for the elite rate. Kind of sad really. <BR> <BR> <BR> Still think being... Thu, 21 Feb 2013 15:16:57 EST It is time. It is time for me to STOP making excuses about why I can't or haven't meet all my goals. <BR> <BR> It is time to commit. <BR> <BR> It is time to STOP being afraid of failing! <BR> <BR> It is time to STOP talking myself out of wanting to meet my goals! (seriously I do convince myself I don't want this! How unproductive is that!?!) <BR> <BR> It is time to just DO IT! <BR> <BR> I am ready to MAKE PROGRESS <BR> <BR> What I have been doing yes has worked moderately. Slow steady progress comb... Thu, 21 Feb 2013 15:01:01 EST Starting a "good' day streak : ) I decided to focus more on a positive. If I could have the option I would probably have every ticker at the bottom of my page lol! <BR> <BR> I would have count down to my upcoming 12k there for sure! Of course a ticker for fitness minutes! Then my body fat and if I could figure out a ticker for increasing body mass I would have it there too. And days since having any sugar days since having too many grains! (big problem for me lately) <BR> <BR> Anyway you get my point. I like to keep track... Tue, 19 Feb 2013 01:24:18 EST My Vday gifts to ME : )! This is what I got myself for vday! I had been all out of cacao nibs for a while now and recently ran out of my hemp protein. So I decided I would restock along with some of my favorite bars and even added a new item to try as a treat to myself or Valentine's day : )! Box arrived this morning! I can't wait to experiment with the cacao paste. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I got two 3lb bags of hemp protein two boxes of raw revolution ... Fri, 15 Feb 2013 13:47:50 EST Friday Well I woke up with a sore throat... Actually kind of started feeling it a little last night. I am not going to let this stick or get worse. I am not stuffed up or anything else at this point so I am going to do the same thing I did last time. Rest. Well no workout at least. And try to rest a little when I can! And I am taking raw garlic along with my ginger heavy juice this morning! <BR> <BR> This is not going to derail my focus though :-)! I am saying on track with my eating plan. Eating ... Fri, 15 Feb 2013 10:15:54 EST These are some motivating and inspiring people! Wow. Check out these stories. <BR> <BR> First just pure inspiration and proof that most of what our bodies are capable of is really inside us. In our heads if we really think about it. We can chose to do something even if the odds are against us or logic tells us it is imposable. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Read his story here <BR> <BR> <link><BR>/heroes-running-louie-zamperini </link> <BR... Tue, 12 Feb 2013 13:54:00 EST A little happy blog : ) Can't leave spark on a negative with my last blog! <BR> <BR> So here is a little "happy" stuff <em>211</em> <BR> <BR> First like I said in my feed feeling like it is closer to spring here. Just look at the pics of my yard. On the left is what we kept waking up to a few weeks ago. And the right is today. Yea sun went away lol... <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> There is actually a few cherry blossoms! <BR> <BR> And my little guy's stitc... Fri, 8 Feb 2013 17:08:28 EST