IMMYSTICMARGO's SparkPeople Blog IMMYSTICMARGO's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Frozen as Time Passes by. It's been one month since my little and only brother took his life. Over the month I have had time to reflect on all our time together and have come to accept and forgive him. He told me he would do it years ago if he was pushed too far. He was diagnosed with Ankylosing Spondylitis last year in May and the doctor said it would be years until it affected him. Upon ex-ray for viability of organs (donation) we discovered his condition had progressed more quickly than in any patient with AS in hi... Sat, 12 Jan 2013 11:50:00 EST Off My Rocker and in the Grave. And here I thought nothing else could go so horribly wrong in my life. After a 13 hour stand off in the attic of my fathers house my little and only brother killed himself. It's been a few days and it seems I have internalized my emotions, I cannot sleep for more than a couple hours before he makes his way into my dreams. I cannot eat or drink because it hurts too much to do so. I'm holding up my family as best I can, Pray my legs hold us until after his funeral. Tue, 18 Dec 2012 05:23:55 EST The Final End to a Life Less Lived. My father has been through more medical emergencies in the past 3 years than anyone should ever have to go through. It all started with his ribs fracturing for no apparent reason. followed by surgeries and more broken bones including his spine. followed up by a double pulmonary embolism. He has failed to take care of him self, and will not change his situation enough to let anyone help him. It appears he has reached the end staged of organ failure. He will not accept this or take care of hims... Thu, 6 Dec 2012 16:01:17 EST Pianos for Excersize! I found a stand up grand piano on the side of the road a few nights ago, I've checked on it the past two nights and it was still there lastnight so today I'm going to get it. I don't have a truck so I will be walking it home. It weighs between 600 and 700 pounds, I need a cheer team!!!! I've got just over a mile to go with it, I think I can, I think I can! Thu, 6 Dec 2012 11:11:33 EST Potable water. Where I live I don't have access to potable water unless I buy it from a store. Yesterday is the second time in two weeks I have ran out. There is no local bus transportation to get to the closest store (20 miles away) and there is only one car in this household, which is out of gas. I have $15 at the moment and don't get paid till Wednesday. I live in a back woods community with my mother and little sister. My mother cannot get a job because she is of terminal status, and my little sister is... Mon, 3 Dec 2012 15:23:52 EST Losing track of time. Within the past year I have lost track of time, this year has not much but a blur of one bad event after another. Shortly after I discovered Spark People my father went into the hospital, he had a double pulmonary embolism (he was not good to start with, he broke his back two years ago and has been struggling since). The doctors said it was a miracle he survived, most people don't survive a single let alone a double. Then my little brother was arrested three times in one week on different cha... Sun, 2 Dec 2012 11:39:47 EST Gaining... So I've lost a total of 2 pounds, and now I've gained them back... I haven't changed my diet I just added walking everyday to change things up a bit... What's going on? Tue, 24 Jan 2012 23:02:23 EST