HOWIEANN's SparkPeople Blog HOWIEANN's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community 35 Days In 35 days, I will not be at work. I will be home, getting ready to take my family on vacation. A break from all the craziness of our normal life. And there are no words to describe just how much I need to get away! I'm just worn out! Thu, 16 Feb 2017 10:24:12 EST 44 Days In 44 days, I will have the car loaded and be trying to get some rest in before we take off for our huge vacation. Spring Break in Florida! It's going to be interested to see how everything goes, but we're going to have a great time! <BR> <BR> Now, some things to think about... I have to get into a bit of a walking routine otherwise Disney and Universal Studios will be really hard... assuming we get to go to them. Also, I need to be sure that everyone has at least one pair of good gym shoes!... Tue, 7 Feb 2017 12:48:07 EST 44 Days In 44 days, I will have the car loaded and be trying to get some rest in before we take off for our huge vacation. Spring Break in Florida! It's going to be interested to see how everything goes, but we're going to have a great time! <BR> <BR> Now, some things to think about... I have to get into a bit of a walking routine otherwise Disney and Universal Studios will be really hard... assuming we get to go to them. Also, I need to be sure that everyone has at least one pair of good gym shoes!... Tue, 7 Feb 2017 12:48:05 EST How to Get my Girlies Involved Here's the thing, I want a healthy lifestyle to be just that... a lifestyle. I want the girls to eat healthy because it makes us feel good. I want them to exercise because it's fun and because it makes us strong. I don't want to make foods "bad" because they will make you fat. Or make exercise something you "have" to do. I hated gym class and all that. Why? Because I wasn't good at it and so I was made to feel like I wasn't good enough. Right now, Alicia loves gym class. She's not great at it... Fri, 26 Jun 2015 17:51:28 EST 51 Weeks 51 weeks until Florida 2016! <BR> <BR> It's been a little bit of a rough week. With Father's Day a special little girl's 10th birthday, and evening swim lessons, it's been hard to get myself on track. <BR> <BR> I did not lose any weight this week. Yesterday morning, I was down a pound. Today, I'm right back where I was last week. I'm choosing not to stress over it. Just keep going. <BR> <BR> Here's the good points: <BR> 1) Yes, I had ice cream this week. But it was planned and that's ok. A... Thu, 25 Jun 2015 20:42:18 EST 52 Weeks I meant to write this a couple of days ago and call it "One Year from Today", but life got away from me. Regardless, this will work. :) <BR> <BR> At this time, 52 weeks from now, assuming all goes well, we will all be in our Jeep heading to Florida. We're planning a huge (epic?) family vacation with my parents, my brother and sister-in-law, and my sister. We plan to start in the Tampa area and visit my grandpa's grave, spend an afternoon at the beach. Then we'll spend a day at the Everglades... Fri, 19 Jun 2015 01:08:35 EST Starting Fresh I think I've written 500 starting fresh blogs on here over the years, but here we go with another. Once again, so much has changed since the last time I wrote on here, but that's ok. Those are good changes. But adjusting to them has been difficult. <BR> <BR> In August, I was moved to a different library branch, about 45 minutes away from home. I was also switched from being a children's librarian to a teen librarian. Three months later, I was promoted to branch manager... out at that same fa... Sat, 13 Jun 2015 22:52:29 EST New Goals Goals are always tricky. And how do I measure success? If I say that my goal is to stop drinking pop for 12 weeks and I go 10 weeks perfectly and then have a sip, does that make me a failure? I don't think so, but technically, I didn't meet the goal. I guess that if I can be successful 80% of the time, I'll be ok with it. <BR> <BR> Honestly, right now, my goals seem so basic and so beginner that I hardly can stand to put them down. I should be past all this. But the last several months have ... Wed, 30 Apr 2014 11:44:16 EST One more heartbreak Just as a heads up... this post isn't going to be happy or hopeful or anything good. Honestly, I just need a place to get my feelings down. And while it's ok for people to read and comment, I won't be hurt if people don't either. And I'm going to be putting down everything, so if you don't want scary details, you may want to stop reading. <BR> <BR> We lost our precious Peanut Monday morning. I went to bed thinking everything was ok. About 3:30 am, I woke up, thinking I needed to go to the ba... Wed, 27 Nov 2013 16:10:49 EST Where's the Time Gone? Has it really been almost 3 months since I posted on here? Wow! Time flies, I guess. <BR> <BR> I'm laughing at myself a little, reading the last few posts I wrote. In July and August, I'd probably have cried and thrown in the towel if I'd known that in November I'd only be able to claim a 5 pound loss in 3 months. But ya know what, I'm amazed by it and telling myself to be careful instead. That seemingly small loss means that I'm taking care of myself and not letting all those crazy cravings... Sun, 3 Nov 2013 22:58:50 EST Meal Planning Why is it so hard to plan out meals? Even more to the point - why is it so hard to STICK to the plan? <BR> <BR> Last week was just a wash with meals... not even worth talking about. When I work from 12-8:30, I don't do well with meals for myself and have no real input on meals for the rest of the family. So I'm not even concerning myself with that. <BR> <BR> But I'll have those days where I have a plan... and it's generally pretty healthy. And then I just don't feel like it. Or I'm so worn ... Tue, 13 Aug 2013 15:58:21 EST Getting It Back Together I should never, ever read or write anything when I'm stressed and overly emotional. Just saying... I meant everything I said in my last blog post. But when I look at it today, it feels a little pathetic and not exactly what I meant to express. <BR> <BR> I'm frustrated with myself and my inability to keep anything going. But then, I've lost a couple of pounds in the past week, so maybe that little pity party was what I needed. <BR> <BR> Regardless, I've been thinking and have an idea of wher... Sun, 4 Aug 2013 23:30:42 EST Future plans... Everywhere I look lately I'm seeing comments about team members not doing enough and not working hard enough. Yes, I'm guilty and fall into that category more often than I'd like to admit. <BR> <BR> So, where do I go from here? A part of me wants to say forget it and either drop off the teams or go floater. Part of me wants to fight back. And a huge part of me just wants to give up. <BR> <BR> No, I'm not looking for a million comments telling me why I should stay or what I need to do differ... Wed, 31 Jul 2013 11:49:07 EST One Day at a Time So, yesterday, I planned out our dinner. I had a small pork roast in the crock pot. I knew what veggies and toddler-friendly side I was making. I had stuff to make the picky 8 year old happy. We were going to eat pretty healthy and be able to do so pretty quickly after we got home. <BR> <BR> Then I dropped the nearly full jar of pizza sauce on the kitchen floor. So, do I make the 8 year old miserable or have hubby go out and buy a new jar. I don't want tears, so he's going to go. <BR> <BR> ... Wed, 24 Jul 2013 11:20:29 EST Letting Stress Get the Better of Me If I had sat down to write this half an hour ago, it may have been a different post. <BR> <BR> Then I came across a little article about stress and started thinking. Some of this I just posted on one of my team threads, but it pretty much sums things up. <BR> <BR> Life is crazy busy. There are days where I don't have a second for myself until about 10:30 at night. Our apartment is in a constant state of chaos and disaster. And by the time I can deal with it, I just don't care anymore and I ... Mon, 22 Jul 2013 10:57:14 EST More on Alicia My sweet 7 year old may not live to see 8. Her birthday is Saturday. This morning, she came into my bedroom to find a pair of clean pants. She went back to her room to get dressed and came back in my room 2, maybe 3 minutes later, fully dressed. "I think I just had a seizure," she says, all smiles. I'm completely stumped and have no idea how to respond to her. First of all, she wasn't gone long enough to have walked to and from her room, get dressed and brush her hair plus have and completely... Wed, 19 Jun 2013 10:53:12 EST Needing to Refocus a Bit I'll be honest... I set goals for June and have ignored them. It's been a rough month already. <BR> <BR> My sweet Alicia (almost 8 years old) has Benign Rolandic Epilepsy. Typically, children outgrow it somewhere between 11-13 years old. Some websites have listed a little older, some a little younger, but that seems to be the average. Usually, the seizures happen when the child is waking up or falling asleep. Alicia had her first seizure 3 years ago, when she was almost 5. She had her second... Sun, 16 Jun 2013 02:31:07 EST Goals... and not meeting them... It's no secret that I haven't been on here lately. And it's also no secret that I haven't been doing well on following "the program". I know that I tend to stick with my better habits more consistently when I'm making myself more accountable in this blog. <BR> <BR> So, here are my goals for June. Notice, there is no mention of a number on the scale or inches or anything else. This is just what I hope to do. Some of the goals are trickier than others. And I know that I probably won't be entir... Fri, 31 May 2013 13:13:53 EST Still Here... I've been all kinds of sick since I posted on here last time, so I haven't been very motivated to sit and write. Trying to get a little extra sleep and trying to keep up with everything that has to be done hasn't left lots of time. <BR> <BR> I just took some cold medicine, so I don't have a lot to say. It makes me a little loopy, so it's hard to think. But I thought I'd check in, just for a minute. <BR> <BR> Now, to kick all these cruddies out so that I can get back to what I need to be doi... Fri, 12 Apr 2013 12:04:25 EST Woohoo! I peeked into the 250s today when I weighed in. I know that there's a good chance it won't "stick" for a week yet, but still, I was so excited to see that number pop up on the scale! I'd been flirting with 260 for so long that it was fabulous to see that I'd dipped under it! <BR> <BR> I haven't seen that number since shortly after my Sami was born. Thu, 21 Mar 2013 22:57:25 EST How many steps? So, yesterday I got my Fitbit, so today was my first day wearing it. So far, it's just an interesting little toy, but I'm thinking it will become more. <BR> <BR> This was one of those days that so easily could have turned disastrous. I had an 8am meeting. Thankfully, my mom is the bestest mom in the world and agreed to make sure that my girlie got to school on time and told me to just bring baby girl in her jammies and that she'd feed them both breakfast. This is one of the difficulties of b... Wed, 13 Mar 2013 23:21:58 EST One week in... My doctor appointment was 1 week ago. In the last week, I've paid a lot more attention to my eating. And it shows... <BR> <BR> Today the scale was down 2.6 pounds from last week! Wow! <BR> <BR> He ended up filling my thyroid medicine for 6 months and said that's when I need to come back. If I can keep this up... Well, I could be back at pre-Alicia pregnancy weight when I see him. That hasn't happened since 2006 when I had my gall bladder problems and surgery and could hardly eat anything wi... Mon, 11 Mar 2013 10:48:36 EST Thoughts for the weekend.... One of my team challenges is finishing up soon. And 2 other teams are getting ready to start a new challenge. <BR> <BR> Where am I in all this... <BR> <BR> I feel like I pretty much threw away this last set of challenges. Yes, I've kept moving and kept moving in the right direction, but have I really taken advantage of the opportunities? <BR> <BR> Sadly, no. And that's bothering me more right now than it usually would. <BR> <BR> No, I'm not going to beat myself up over it. No, I'm not goi... Sun, 10 Mar 2013 00:14:12 EST Please don't feed the librarians! One area that is so hard to fight is the fact that our community loves its librarians! It's not unusual to have treats and goodies come in from our patrons. A bag of candy here, a box of chocolate there. A plate of cookies from this person, a loaf of banana bread from that person. And that's nothing compared to what Christmas looks like. At one point the table in our lounge was so full of cookies and other goodies that there wasn't room to sit and eat! And it's (almost) all good stuff! <BR> ... Thu, 7 Mar 2013 22:29:28 EST Three months... You Have Three Months No, I'm not terribly sick and dying or anything. But I made that dreaded doctor's appointment and saw him today. <BR> <BR> Did you know that they can do the A1C test right there in the office now? They can. And he wasn't impressed. It's below diabetic numbers, but not where he wants it. And it's in the range where he considers treating it. So, he gave me 3 months to get it under control. Ugh. I'll bet that he only gives me a 3 month supply of my Synthroid so that I have to come back, too. Ev... Mon, 4 Mar 2013 14:16:18 EST What's there to say? It's been a long time since I've visited the little blog. You should have seen the dust webs I had to clear away! <BR> <BR> I don't know what to say. I've been playing with the same 4 pounds since before Christmas... really... catch, tag, hide and seek... it's all great fun... honest! <BR> <BR> <em>211</em> <BR> <BR> I have to go see my doctor sometime soon. He won't refill my Synthroid without an appointment. Honestly, I'm dreading this one. I'm know my numbers aren't much better than... Mon, 4 Mar 2013 00:36:18 EST I Just Don't Have Time... How many times have I made that excuse? Too many to count, I'm sure. <BR> <BR> And yet I can find time to sit on the computer. <BR> <BR> No, this post isn't about beating myself up over past failures. It's about the fact that life is short and we don't know how much time we have. <BR> <BR> It's only Monday and already I know it's going to be a tough week at the library. Two coworkers had a family member pass away this weekend. I can't even imagine what those families are going through. Nei... Mon, 7 Jan 2013 11:45:55 EST Christmas Break My Onyx Outlaws are quickly coming to the holiday break, and one of our challenges is to come up with a plan to be successful during that break, which includes Christmas and New Year's. <BR> <BR> So, here we go: <BR> <BR> 1) Stay involved. The Outlaws are going to keep the fire burning, so we're not out in the cold. Also, I have my STOP and Yellow teams to be involved in, too. There's really no excuse NOT to stay accountable. <BR> 2) Stay away from all the goodies that will soon start pouri... Mon, 3 Dec 2012 12:11:35 EST Week 10 Reflection for Team Yellow Back in September, Team Yellow had us identify 5 things that hold us back in our weight loss efforts. I'll be honest... I kind of had forgotten about that post. So, how'd I do? <BR> <BR> 1) Priorities... have I done better at focusing on the things that matter? Somewhat. I still waste too much time on the computer and don't get things finished that are important. I still don't give exercise the priority it should have. BUT I'm getting better. Progress is good. <BR> <BR> 2) Planning... I'm d... Wed, 14 Nov 2012 22:11:10 EST Not perfect, but... I didn't have the greatest weekend in terms of exercise or food. But, you know, I'm ok with that. The weather was pretty lousy Saturday and Sunday, so the thoughts of taking a walk around the camp kind of went out the window. And I indulged more than I should have in the treats the camp had to offer. BUT I had a weekend where I could relax and just do something that I enjoy. And sometimes that's the more important thing to consider. <BR> <BR> <em>30</em> <BR> <BR> Now, to pull myself ba... Wed, 14 Nov 2012 11:07:21 EST And this is why... This is why I don't do blogs... I do really well for awhile and then... nothing. :) <BR> <BR> This weekend is my scrapbook weekend, where I get to go away for 3 days and focus on me. It's also a weekend filled with lots of sitting and really good food. So, it needs a plan. Although, that plan needs to not take away from my scrapbooking time. :) <BR> <BR> Exercise... I'm planning to take at least a short walk around the camp each day. I always enjoy wandering and seeing the place where I mad... Thu, 8 Nov 2012 12:23:41 EST It's November! So, here's how Halloween played out... we walked around my grandparents' old subdivision, hitting most of the houses. It took about an hour, probably. Samantha actually walked almost the whole way. She gave up about 5 minutes before we got back to the car, so I pushed her in her stroller. The girls got WAY more candy than they needed, but I expected that one. So far they've each eaten a couple of pieces. <BR> <BR> We didn't get ANY kiddos at our place. So I have a bowl of candy that I'm goin... Thu, 1 Nov 2012 21:01:47 EST Happy Halloween! So, how to deal with this crazy holiday? <BR> <BR> 1) Buy 2 bags of Halloween candy. Send the one that tastes better to school for 2nd grader's class party. Use the bag I enjoy less for handing out to trick or treaters so that leftovers won't be so tempting. <BR> <BR> 2) Take girls to subdivision that has lots of houses to get in some good walking time. Push the 2 year old in her stroller so that she can last longer. <BR> <BR> No, I won't get a lot of exercise in, but it will be better tha... Wed, 31 Oct 2012 10:58:43 EST It's Almost November It's been a tough month... between Alicia's issues at school, an insane work schedule and just trying to keep afloat, I don't feel like I've done much to help myself. Yet, even though I'm not meeting the goals I set for my challenges in terms of weight loss, I am steadily losing. I haven't had many weeks where my weight has been up and even those have been small bumps. This week, I saw the lowest weigh in that I've had in a long time. So, I'm definitely doing something right. Now... for the m... Mon, 29 Oct 2012 11:25:45 EST 12 Week Goals for BLC 20 It seems like every team I'm on right now wants me to post a plan. It starts feeling like I'm repeating myself, but maybe that's what I need. :) <BR> <BR> Time is never an easy thing to deal with... But if I make myself get to bed by a decent time, I'll be better able to get up in the mornings and get my day started right. Hopefully to fit in a little exercise. But definitely to get in a good breakfast and get healthy lunches together for Alicia and I. Planning our family meals better and sh... Tue, 18 Sep 2012 00:02:43 EST And summer is over, but wasn't it fun! We had a good summer. It had some major events and some hardships, but overall, things are good. We have a way to go, but we'll get there. <BR> <BR> One of my teams has the challenge to identify 5 things that are holding us back in our weight loss efforts. So, here we go: <BR> 1) Priorities... I wanted to say time, but I'm not sure that's exactly true. Yes, I'm often too tired to get up earlier in the morning. But why is that? Because I stayed up too late. Why is that? Because I was playing ... Thu, 6 Sep 2012 13:33:59 EST Summer Reflections... With all of my team challenges ending within a couple of weeks at each other, this seems like a good time to do some thinking about my summer. It's been a wild one, that's for sure! :) <BR> <BR> June 24: Signed a lease on an apartment. <BR> June 30: Moved into apartment. <BR> July 3: Got the news that I'd gotten a promotion based on graduating with my Master's in Library Science. <BR> Then there's Summer Reading at the library, which is the most fun, but most intense 8 weeks of the year at w... Tue, 21 Aug 2012 22:33:50 EST Looking forward to a break... After work tomorrow, I'll be on vacation! I am so excited about that! Even though I had a few days off in June, that ended up being filled with Alicia's birthday and party and starting the whole moving process. Saturday will be a much needed shopping day. Nothing fun... shoes for the girls and whatever we may still need for school. Sunday is a party day. Then on Monday, we'll head out for 3 days at our favorite indoor water park. 3 days where I can't feel guilty about not getting things done.... Thu, 9 Aug 2012 17:07:55 EST Making Some Progress Life is definitely looking up. The scale appears to like this whole moving into an apartment thing. There's still a lot to got getting to where we need to be, but life in the apartment is good. And then there's the work stuff. I didn't expect to see any benefits of my master's degree for quite awhile, so getting a promotion and raise is a big deal! The fact that I get to keep doing what I enjoy and stay at the branch library I enjoy is an excellent bonus. <BR> <BR> And my girlies are getting... Mon, 9 Jul 2012 09:52:28 EST What a week... I can't claim any successes this week. It's been a tough one. But life will go on. <BR> <BR> My BLC Yellow team is finishing up the spring challenge. And I don't know that I can claim any great success there. I'm more determined to do well, so that's something. And I'm doing better with my sleep habits, so that's an improvement. And I haven't had pop in awhile, so that's good to. So while it's not showing on the scale yet, I guess I am making some progress. <BR> <BR> Now, back to that makin... Wed, 23 May 2012 22:42:03 EST It is finished! Sunday was graduation day. It's hard to believe that after 3 1/2 years, my classes are finished. I keep finding myself wondering what assignments I have to work on and then it hits me. :) <BR> <BR> So now, there's one less excuse. No, it doesn't free up vast amounts of time, because mostly I just wasn't sleeping enough. But it does help. <BR> <BR> I've been getting to sleep earlier and my body is finally adjusting. I'm falling asleep quickly instead of laying there for an hour. Now, it's pr... Wed, 16 May 2012 11:45:07 EST I know it isn't true... But sometimes I wonder if maybe I like being fat? I have a really hard time getting myself moving and then, I can't make myself keep going. Maybe subconciously, I don't want to be healthy. <BR> <BR> I don't really believe that, but after I just sat here and ate quite badly for breakfast, I have to start wondering about myself. And exercise is a joke, really. <BR> <BR> BUT, I am doing better on my sleep habits. I'm not laying awake in bed for hours. I'm still not getting enough sleep, but it... Wed, 9 May 2012 11:27:23 EST I make me laugh... I haven't had much success. Or kept putting forth the effort. I hit a rough couple of weeks with school and everything shut down. <BR> <BR> But school is FINISHED!!!! (Assuming I pass the class... I wish he'd grade our assignments alread!) And now I can start focusing on other things. Like me. I'm going to try to keep this blog at least slightly up to date. No more months between posts. Just weeks. <em>30</em> <BR> <BR> And I'm going to go easy on myself and just basically start again. No... Wed, 2 May 2012 11:23:42 EST Plans always change... Well, here we are... a month later and at pretty much the same place. Why? Because I let it happen. Or not happen, however you'd like to look at it. For whatever reason... there it is. It's my choice to do something about it or not. <BR> <BR> Somehow, I need to make the connection between taking care of me as an idea and taking care of me as an action. <BR> <BR> I'm just not sure how to make that connection happen. <BR> <BR> But I'm going to try. Tonight, instead of playing on the computer... Fri, 3 Feb 2012 23:13:21 EST New Year... New Me? We have several big things happening this year: My graduation in May, my 20 year class reunion (really, I'm old enough for that?), and hopefully a trip to Disneyland (partially paid by the library!) <BR> <BR> And I want to be in better shape for them. I don't want to be dragging or wishing I could hide from the cameras. I want to know that I'm doing something to make myself healthier. Wed, 4 Jan 2012 12:04:35 EST Why do I want to lose the weight? Before I type this, I have to say... I realize that school makes everything more difficult and I'm honestly not picking on myself. <BR> <BR> Because I'm tired of being too tired to do things with my girls. They deserve a parent who can do things with them. <BR> <BR> Because my girls need at least one healthy parent. <BR> <BR> Because I would love to be able to go shopping in the regular section of a store for once. <BR> <BR> Because I want to feel good about how I look. Wed, 9 Nov 2011 10:43:08 EST Reality Check We're on vacation this week. 3 days at an indoor water park. And I realized just how much I'm letting my girls down. There are slides I couldn't do with my Alicia because I'm too big. That hurts. And makes me feel like a lousy mama. Whether it's for my girls or myself, I will be able to do all the slides with them if we decide to do the water park again next summer. And if we don't. I'll just be in better shape than I am right now and we'll find something else that we're going to do. :) Thu, 18 Aug 2011 00:05:30 EST No Big Declarations I think that I set myself up to fail. I make these grand announcements about how I'm going to do all this work and how I'll be at my goal by this date. And then I don't make the goals, so I quit trying. No more. Simple, straightforward goals. <BR> <BR> 1) I will check in with my teams at least 3 times a week. <BR> 2) I will track my food. <BR> 3) I will exercise at least 3 times a week. No more of this exercise a lot one week and then not at all the next. :) <BR> 4) I will post on this blog ... Mon, 11 Apr 2011 23:21:11 EST Setting Some Goals After I just ate too many Doritos, I'm thinking about goals. Nice, huh? <BR> <BR> I'm in a couple of challenges and they all have either just started a new round or are getting ready to start, so this actually is a good time to think about goals. :) <BR> <BR> I go back to work on Oct. 11. By then, I'd like to: <BR> <BR> 1. Be to 234 pounds. Yes, that's 2 pounds a week... not an easy goal, but I think I can do it. <BR> 2. Be exercising consistently. 3 days a week for cardio and 3 for streng... Fri, 10 Sep 2010 13:59:05 EST Wow! So much has changed... I haven't even thought about my little since that post November. That day, I was basically told to get myself in shape or face serious health risks. I was also told that I most likely wouldn't have anymore children. <BR> <BR> Less then 9 months later, Samantha (Sami Jo) arrived, bringing our little family to 4 and defying lots of odds by being perfectly healthy. <BR> <BR> And as for my health? Well, I'm 25 pounds under where I was at that appointment last November. I lost about 15 pounds be... Fri, 10 Sep 2010 01:21:08 EST