HAWTLIKEME's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=HAWTLIKEME HAWTLIKEME's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Be Your Own Version of Hawt http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5389192 Recently, I responded to a new SparkFriend's post lamenting about the state of her current body and in anticipation of it not being perfectly what she hopes it will be after weight loss. I have struggled with my past and current bodies for this same reason and find myself quite often being angry and resentful that even after an 80 pound loss, I don't look anywhere near what I feel I should. Yet, when seeing it from someone else's eyes, I found the perspective to see just what is really impo... Fri, 14 Jun 2013 14:55:26 EST Keep Your Eyes On The Prize (especially AFTER you've won it) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5221470 Back in 2009 I had completely had it with living my life in the body that I had become far too accustomed to. I had finished having babies in 1997, but not only had I not lost my "baby" fat, but my weight just kept creeping up with every passing year until I had reached an all time high of 226lbs and had found it perfectly acceptable. Then, one day near Christmas 2009, I decided that I had been fooling myself that I was happy the way I was. <BR> <BR> I resolved to make a change in 2010 and... Thu, 24 Jan 2013 10:46:10 EST Binge Averted: Another Learning Experience http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5007813 Just wanted to quickly journal/blog this morning as I am able to reflect on the night before. Yesterday afternoon/evening, I found myself on the precipice of the cliff, leaning over and I managed to pull myself back in in time to limit the damage. <BR> <BR> Roughly translated: I came closer to a binge than I've been since May and I think I managed to avert it. Although, I did shed a couple of tears over having come so close, I got through the fear and guilt and managed to feel pretty dar... Thu, 9 Aug 2012 07:56:59 EST Random List of Latest Little NSV's http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4998659 1) managing stressful workload at work without pigging out when I get home (finally broken the habit of snacking like crazy before supper) <BR> 2) it's been 74 days since my last binge <BR> 3) graciously accepted ONE delicious, home-made chocolate chip cookie from my co-worker and stopped at that <BR> 4) split my specially ordered, chef-made lunch into half-portions so that I can enjoy it again tomorrow <BR> 5) effectively using walks and Curves circuit workouts to help manage stress as oppo... Thu, 2 Aug 2012 21:43:24 EST Missed You. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4926493 Hey! I'm back. Did you miss me? I missed you - all my Spark-friends. <BR> <BR> I've probably been MIA since about late February or March when I started working with my Wellness Consultant. That took up alot of my Spark energy and it was a great experience which gave me imeasurable perspective. I didn't lose any weight, but I did learn alot about myself and my relationship with food and managed to maintain my weight despite eating at least 1800 nutrient dense calories per day!! I now ... Thu, 14 Jun 2012 14:52:14 EST A New Approach, But Will It Begin My Final Chapter? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4784600 What do you do when your plateau turned gain, turned plateau lasts almost a year and a quarter?? Give up? No. Try something different?? As if you haven't been doing that all along. A plateau this long and you've got to know that you've tried just about every strategy that you could find to "bust that plateau"!! <BR> <BR> So, next to accepting that things will continue to stay the same, what options are there left? <BR> <BR> For me, I decided to enlist more help. So far, my journey has... Mon, 12 Mar 2012 22:13:23 EST High Protein Struggles and Benefits http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4756509 Trying to eat more lean proteins can be a real challenge for someone who no longer wants to eat red meat, and has an out of control addiction to high sugar and salty carbs. <BR> <BR> The processed carbs are truly my biggest downfall, but they make me happy. Litterally. <BR> <BR> After only two-three weeks of eating on a high protein plan, I have not only started losing again, but have also fallen into a withdrawl funk. I miss my sugar!!! Unfortunately, I fell prey to my addiction this mo... Sat, 25 Feb 2012 12:35:29 EST I Love My Fat!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4700827 Well, not really, me, but my body seems to love it so much that it doesn't want to let it go!! <BR> <BR> I'm open to all and any little tidbits of advice here. I'm getting a little scared actually, that I am unable to lose weight. Not to be confused with discouragement as I'm not close to giving up. I just need to know what the heck else I can do. Here are the following pieces of advice that I've been given and followed and what I've done to improve my chances of success. Anything else ... Tue, 24 Jan 2012 10:34:49 EST Why, Exactly, Am I Doing This Anyway? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4686624 I’ve been reading some of the New Year blogs and the overall dominating theme seems to be one of renewal of the commitment to and the spirit of living the healthy life. I want to do that too, but I'm also taking more time to be introspective and completely honest with myself in this journey and I've come up with some inconsistencies that I think it would be both interesting to investigate and irresponsible to ignore. <BR> <BR> 1) Who am I? <BR> <BR> Okay, yes, you may argue that we can re-... Tue, 17 Jan 2012 11:30:11 EST Low Cal Flavour Heaven http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4662630 Just created a new recipe and had to share for anyone who loves the flavours of pizza but wants a low carb and low cal version. <BR> <BR> Got the idea when I was making some mini pizzas for the family with whole wheat english muffins. Healthy enough and something that I often do enjoy, but today I had already had my limit of bread products, so I decided to try something different and found my new favourite go to snack or meal. <BR> <BR> Ingredient list: <BR> <BR> half of a large green p... Fri, 6 Jan 2012 18:55:52 EST Phantom Scents, Pizza and Lemon Meringue Pie http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4659094 Whew, what a day yesterday was. It was my first day since Boxing Day that I've been really, really tempted to fall off the sugar-free wagon. <BR> <BR> My oldest son turned 18 yesterday and I was feeling old and sentimental, but WHY I kept smelling brownies is a mystery to me. There were no brownies anywhere. I wasn't thinking about them, missing them or even craving them. Until out of nowhere, I would suddenly catch a whiff of what smelled like fresh baked brownies. In my office, out ... Thu, 5 Jan 2012 09:46:40 EST Good riddance to 2011 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4641579 And here's hoping for a 2012 that is more like my 2010. <BR> <BR> 2010 was a great year for me and my health. I lost 68 pounds in 2010 and learned how to eat healthy, learned how to run (C25K), learned how to enjoy physical activity, completed a Try-a-try and truly felt great inside and out. I had lots of energy, I was committed to my goals of improving my health and I enjoyed the fruits of my labour. <BR> <BR> Then came 2011. For whatever reason (stress, lack of the same degree of com... Wed, 28 Dec 2011 11:51:34 EST Thing About Caramel Corn Is.... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4631663 It's really hard to stop eating it. The great part, though, is that at least it does fill you up and you have to stop eating it before you can do too much damage. Finally a "sane" Christmas treat!! <BR> <BR> Dontcha love fiber? Mon, 19 Dec 2011 15:15:06 EST Things that make you go hmmmm.... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4563496 Just noticing some things today. <BR> <BR> Have you noticed that my recent blogs and statuses have been kind of negative and over-sensitive? <BR> <BR> I have and I notice that I have been pretty much feeling that way for the last two weeks. <BR> <BR> Not sure what the deal is, but I have to shake it off and find my happy, positive,optimistic self hidden under this moody drama queen veil. Not sure where I've gone, but I feel like I'm MIA and some weird, testy, anxious lady has taken over m... Tue, 1 Nov 2011 15:20:44 EST Defeated Update http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4555370 Although parenting teens can seem like a sometimes impossible and always thankless job, part of my problem is learning how to prioritize time for myself and other tasks and responsibilities along with the needs (and wants) of my kids. I'm still having trouble juggling everything and am learning each day what I need to do to keep myself and everyone around me health and sane. <BR> <BR> That said, I certainly still struggle with feeling that I'm not doing enough. I have always felt that way ... Thu, 27 Oct 2011 07:09:37 EST Feeling Defeated http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4552052 Ever have that feeling that the wind has been completely taken out of your sail? Well today I feel like that. I know, I could just decide to pick myself up, brush myself off and change course, but that requires energy and desire. Both of which I am lacking today. <BR> <BR> I feel used, abused, unappreciated and unable to meet expecations. Mine and those of the people I care about. Whatever I have to give just isn't enough or good enough. My best just isn't cutting it anymore and I'm at ... Tue, 25 Oct 2011 07:53:07 EST Why Oh Why Did I Teach My Kids How To Bake?! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4549629 As a chronic, recovering binge eater, I have learned to put plenty of safety measures in place to reduce the risk of binging on my danger foods. Simply not having them available is the simplest strategy that works most of the time, but lately it hasn't been quite that simple and I am being challenged daily. <BR> <BR> You see DS is a very picky eater and within the past couple of years was becoming dangerously underweight. I was instructed by the pediatrician to let him eat what he likes ev... Sun, 23 Oct 2011 19:11:01 EST Trying Something Different http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4541248 After having come so close to seeing how I'd really like my body to look and feel, I'm thinking that the only thing that I haven't really given a proper chance is strength training. I think that all the cardio and good eating in the world will only take me so far and as many times as I can remember, I've tried it and never stuck with it. So, now I'm curious: is ST the last peice of the puzzle that I need to add in order to meet my ultimate goals? <BR> <BR> Only one way to find out. I de... Tue, 18 Oct 2011 08:57:21 EST Starting Over http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4456317 Summer's almost over and what have you accomplished? I have had a great summer of relaxation and fun in the sun with my family but did I take full advantage of the extra daylight to run, walk, bike and swim as much as I'd hoped? No. Did I manage to meet my goal of losing that last 8 pounds or even just maintaining my weight throughout the summer? No. Did I track, journal, blog or even log in to Spark People even once per week? No, and I can tell you that it is no coincidence. Had I cont... Tue, 30 Aug 2011 10:57:20 EST Finish What You Started http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4240665 Ok, so did you watch Biggest Loser last night?? Wow!! I can NOT remember a time when someone's words echoed so loudly in my mind. Olivia was not only GLOWING, she was more inspiring to me than anything I've experienced in my journey so far. When she stepped on the scale to find her weight in the 140's I was so thrilled for her, even if a bit envious, but her speech about finally finishing something she started felt as though she were speaking directly to ME. <BR> <BR> I, like her, am a s... Wed, 18 May 2011 10:00:45 EST Spark People is a big Tease http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4231689 Ok, let me start this blog by saying that I am a bit cranky this morning, but I was very disappointed when I went to enter today's "Win a bike" contest on the Daily Spark only to find that the contest is only open to American Members. I understand that the logistics of opening it up to members around the world would be crazy, but perhaps it should not be so widely publicised then or even include a line like Hey, American Spark members: Enter now to win a bike instead of getting us all excit... Sat, 14 May 2011 07:32:37 EST Dare to Dream http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4198787 Some days, weeks, months, things don't seem to go right and then we have the good times when everything seems to be going our way. There can be a difference in attitude that causes these streaks or sometimes life just has a way of reminding us that our journey is full of change. The past 6 months or so have had its good moments and its challenging ones, but I'm making a vow before you that this is the turning point to good stuff. <BR> <BR> Maybe I'm dreaming or maybe I'm doing my best to g... Fri, 29 Apr 2011 14:09:21 EST Glass-Half-Full Needed For Weight Loss and Maintenance Success http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4165751 No, I'm not talking about water. We all know that we need more than half a glass. Keep your sights on 8 glasses a day for sure. <BR> <BR> What I'm talking about here is attitude. I like to think that I tend to be a fairly optimistic and positive person, but throughout this process, it is very clear to me that I have waivered frequently from the positive outlook; dwelling on what I have not yet acheived rather than how far I've come and what I've overcome. My impatience gets the better o... Thu, 14 Apr 2011 14:25:47 EST Sick & Tired: Senseless, Childish Ramblings (Read at own risk) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4148134 Please accept my apologies that my ENTER key doesn't work so this is a long paragraph. Things need to change. I'm bored BOOOOOORRRRRDDDDD! So bored. I think I'm just so done with winter and getting very impatient for all the things that feed my soul and give me life. I miss the warmth of the sun, I miss the smells and sounds of being outside on a warm day and getting out there enjoying a bike ride, a swim, a walk or walk/jog. I'm just sick and tired of feeling either cooped up, bored ... Wed, 6 Apr 2011 22:38:34 EST Reluctant Runner Part 3 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4098181 So, I just started back into doing intervals (Walk/Jog your way to virtual 5K). I'm on week two of a 5 week program. Last summer, I completed the C25K pgrm, but had to do several weeks over several times and only was only ever able to complete 3K in the 30 minutes that I was supposed to be able to do 5K in. <BR> <BR> I'm obviously a slow runner. I'm not built for running. I feel slow, lumbering, uncoordinated and even after completing the C25K program, still found running to be very unnatur... Thu, 17 Mar 2011 10:25:06 EST Daylight Savings Time: More Disruptive Than Just Sleeping Patterns http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4090496 OK, so, I know that there are alot of us out there who really enjoy the extra day light in the evening, but truth be told, I would enjoy it just as much in the morning and am among many who is wondering why are we doing this to ourselves every year - TWICE!! <BR> <BR> We all know how it disrupts our sleep patterns and those with young children know too that bed and wake time routines are hard enough to entrench without having to train our systems all over again twice a year. <BR> <BR> Dragg... Mon, 14 Mar 2011 11:47:43 EST Incentives and Weight Loss Phases http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4043841 OOOoooh, I just have to share my Spark news with my Sparkfriends!! I'm sooo excited, I can hardly contain myself. I think I'm officially entering what I will call Phase 2 of my weight loss journey. <BR> <BR> Phase One, in my mind, was my original goal. The one we all set at the beginning when the entire tast seems to0 daunting and far away - to be healthy. I set my original goal weight at 158 which was the very high end of the BMI healthy range for my height. Never even imagining that... Thu, 24 Feb 2011 09:58:18 EST It Probably Doesn't Count, but... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4041781 Since I've been feeling under the weather, my appetite has all but disappeared. I guess the results on the scale this week won't last long. I wish I could have such appetite control on other days without the yucky side effects of this bug, but more than likely, when I'm feeling better, I'll want to eat the whole world!! Keeping up the fluid intake, though and that's always a good thing. Wed, 23 Feb 2011 14:44:09 EST Another Discovery by Minnie Mouse http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4037702 Just caught the last of a really cool segment on Canada AM this morning about some researchers working with mice to measure the value and effectiveness of excercise over inactivity. It will totally validate all the hard work you're putting in to know that the muscular skeletal and cell structures of the sisters who were forced to jog on a treadmill regularly over those who didn't were phenomenally healthier and looked and acted younger. The four were shown in their nest together and the two... Tue, 22 Feb 2011 08:58:06 EST (Almost) A Wasted Day http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4036547 Thankfully, my early morning swims are so automatic to me now, I managed to get out of the house and get some excercise. Sore throat and low energy kept me from doing much else. Some lazy time spent with the kids and a great game of monopoly and it wasn't a total waste of a holiday. Sure am hoping to feel better tomorrow and I'll try to make up for the fitness minutes lost. Mon, 21 Feb 2011 20:46:01 EST 5 Things I'm Thankful for Today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4033550 Thanks to WiiGal's great tips, here is today's blog of "5 Things" <BR> <BR> 1) Today's gorgeous sunshine and the longer days to enjoy it in. <BR> 2) That I have a healthy, crazy, fun and loving family to enjoy Family Day with tomorrow. <BR> 3) That I live in Ontario and get Family Day off tomorrow!! LOL <BR> 4) Food on the table and wood in the stove. <BR> 5) My newest walking partner and her relentlessness. Sun, 20 Feb 2011 21:28:03 EST Uh-oh, Hope I Don't Let My Team Down Right Out of the Gate!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4029834 Hmmmm. I've been so stoked to get started with the Winter 5% Challenge and yet the first LGL challenge is already intimidating to me. I'm not an avid blogger. I struggle with blogging. I can have some perfectionist tendancies and I'm not very concise, so I tend to obsess a little over what I'm writing in my blogs. I don't find the time to blog frequently and prefer to communicate with my little one liner status updates. <BR> <BR> So, here, this week, is my chance to loosen up a littl... Sat, 19 Feb 2011 10:22:16 EST So You Want (NEED) To Break a Plateau? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3943662 Well, having just come out the other side from a plateau that seemed to last forever. (Actually, it was just over 3 months), I am fresh from the feeling of frustration and hopelessness about weight loss goals. <BR> <BR> I thought it would be a nice idea to write down my thoughts and feelings while it's still fresh in my mind. <BR> <BR> While knee-deep in weekly weigh-in disappointments, all I could see was how hard I was working and the disbelief that there was anything else/more that I c... Thu, 20 Jan 2011 10:28:55 EST If You've Got an Itch, SP Will Scratch It http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3914442 How many times have you gone looking for information or advice and not been able to find what you're looking for? Me? Plenty! Since becoming a Spark member, though, I can say, that has changed - BIG TIME. <BR> <BR> It just seems that every time I'm wondering about something or even just considering my next move, someone on a blog, message board or comment has some kind of inspiration for me. Whether I'm looking or not, I will find what I need. <BR> <BR> Doesn't anyone else think that ... Tue, 11 Jan 2011 15:06:48 EST Great Cure for a Hangover http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3903053 Wow! I can't believe I've found yet another benefit to excercise. I have to admit that I was pretty responsible throughout the holidays when it came to enjoying the bevvies, but by Sunday night, we had some friends over, I didn't have to work the next day, and it was just one of those nights when the Whisky Sours were going down well. One thing I forgot, though. I swim every Monday morning at 7am!! Waking up at 6:15 with a huge head wasn't part of the plan. I guess I was really impresse... Sat, 8 Jan 2011 10:39:50 EST A Year of Discoveries http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3884741 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/7/6/l761955763.jpg"> <BR> <BR> So, I thought I would jump on the bandwagon and begin the new year with a reflective look at the past one, 2010 was a year with many challenges, ups and downs and some unwelcome surprises along the way. That said, though, I think it was the best year of my life. In terms of personal growth, that is. In 2010 I turned 42 and received the best gifts anyone could ask for. Self worth, self respect, self confidence ... Mon, 3 Jan 2011 15:34:54 EST C'est La But!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3850593 translation: It's the Goal!!! <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> I've made it. I was hoping to get here before the end of the year and I've made it just under the wire with .5 of a pound bonus. <BR> <BR> I am so thrilled to see myself in the "healthy" zone of the BMI chart and no longer obese. Gone from a BMI of 35.4 to 24.7, 226 lbs to 157.5. (severly obese to healthy) Gone from feeling wrought with self doubt, hatred and chronic anxiety, to self assured, self loving and pretty calm most of the tim... Sat, 18 Dec 2010 10:16:23 EST My Biggest NSV Thus Far http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3841081 With the Christmas season in full swing, I must admit, I was a bit nervous about all of the temptations that will be in abundance at all of the functions that I will be attending. <BR> <BR> The first of many happened this past Saturday night, though, and despite having enjoyed a bit too much Christmas "cheer", my eating was completely under control and I did not once feel as though I was missing out on anything. <BR> <BR> Close friends of ours host a Chrismas fondue night every year and thi... Mon, 13 Dec 2010 10:18:51 EST Some Days!! All Good Things Come To An End. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3789497 Life is full of ups and downs. The trick is to really enjoy those ups, 'cause you KNOW they just won't last. I'm very grateful for every blessing in my life. I'm so fortunate to have a supportive, caring, sensitive, loving DH and three great kids. I've got a wonderful family and family-in-law who love me and I'm generally surrounded by good friends and good times. <BR> <BR> I lead a charmed life. I know this. <BR> <BR> That said, sometimes the charms get a bit tarnished and this morn... Wed, 17 Nov 2010 08:40:14 EST Fairweather Fitness http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3739962 Have you ever had a moment of clarity when you realized that you've been spending more energy being negative, pessimistic and wishing you could change the way things are rather than accepting them and making the best of them? <BR> <BR> I did. Yesterday. While I was dancing like an idiot all around my living room. By myself! <BR> <BR> I've been finding myself completely lost since the weather has turned chilly and I no longer want to get outside and move. Although I've been SAYING that... Mon, 25 Oct 2010 19:46:57 EST Every Road Has its Bumps http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3733756 The road I've been travelling on throughout this journey to health has been pretty smooth up to recently, but I think I've hit some speed bumps. Was I really going too fast? I don't really think so, but it was time to slow down anyway. <BR> <BR> I've been pretty lucky to have been riding along at a fairly good, even, safe speed. You could almost say that I've been on cruise control, but now that I've been forced to ease up on the peddle, I can see now that it's time to shift gears. <BR> ... Fri, 22 Oct 2010 18:20:44 EST Laurels Are Not A Comfortable Place To Rest http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3675106 I didn't have a good week last week and it showed up on the scale. After I completed the Try a Tri, I got lazy and took a bit of a break from my workout routine. I think it was partially subconcious as I felt a bit of a let down and wondered where to go from there. Having completed my training for the tri as well as the C25K, I was feeling a little lost without a training plan to push me forward. As a result, I only completed , one 30 minute stationary bike workout and my 3 regular half h... Mon, 27 Sep 2010 20:00:44 EST I Love You Guys!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3662480 Thank goodness for Sparkpeople. <BR> <BR> I was just reading another member's blog and suddenly came to the realization that you guys (Sparkfriends and Sparkfriends to be) are my new peeps. We're all told that if you want to be successful, hang out with the successful people - they'll rub off on you. You all are my successful people that I'm so glad to be haning around. Without reading all the inspriational blogs, message posts, status updates and SparkPages, I really believe that there... Wed, 22 Sep 2010 16:50:00 EST Update on "Screwed Up" blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3648996 Update on DS: Well, in this respect, things got much worse for my "little love". He later fell on the same side again and after a second visit to the ER, he is now in terrible pain and needs reconstructive surgery. It is so hard to watch those you love be in pain. He's pretty bummed since this now puts his broomball, work and driver's ed activities on hold indefinitely. With surgery, recovery could be a couple of months. Without, 6-8. Poor guy. <BR> <BR> Update on my co worker's car: ... Sat, 18 Sep 2010 08:39:46 EST Screwed Up So Badly Today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3648076 Ok, so, throughout my journey to health, I have learned alot of methods to control stress and anxiety since I've always been a fairly anxious person. Knowing I'm an emotional eater, I've tried reallly hard to limit/control my stress, but one major trigger for me is guilt and today I am guilty of a really poor judgement call. <BR> <BR> I got a call at work that my 16 y o DS had had an accident in gym class and needed to get to the ER right away. Since we are a one car family, and DH was in a... Fri, 17 Sep 2010 20:19:04 EST Getting to Know Me http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3631465 I guess what happens when your energy gets sapped out of you, it gives you time to be quiet, with yourself and think. I'm realizing that the changes that I've been experiencing are leaving me feeling like I need to get to know my new self. <BR> <BR> Another blogger recently wrote about how uncomfortable she is trying on smaller sizes as she is stuck in her old version of herself as a "plus size girl". Although I don't have this particular problem and am currently enjoying window shopping a... Sun, 12 Sep 2010 20:09:15 EST Thump, thump, THUMP! (warning:self indulgent emotional ramblings) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3630166 That's the sound of my heart beating out of my chest from nerves as I approach my first Try-a-Tri next Sunday. I can't believe how nervous I am. I'm focussing on all the little details; things that could go wrong. Ways that I could collosally screw up and make a fool of myself. I really want as many supporters to make it out who can come out, but conversely, what if I don't even make it across the finish line? How embarrassing! I know I can't think like that, but I'm still trying to get... Sun, 12 Sep 2010 11:22:58 EST Time To Get Serious http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3606054 A watched pot never boils they say. Don't focus on the number on the scales, you say. What really matters is how healthy I feel, I say. <BR> <BR> Well, i'm tired of being patient. I'm tired of the slow progress on the scales AND the measuring tape. I'm not happy with a total loss of 3 pounds for the entire month of August and I'm mad as he** and I'm not going to take it anymore!! It's time to regroup as I enter the home stretch. I don't want to keep slowly inching toward my goal this m... Sat, 4 Sep 2010 09:55:39 EST Dear Self: Pick Yourself Up, Dust Yourself Off and Move On http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3582767 This is something that I have to tell my clients on a pretty regular basis (in softer, kinder words, of course) and now its time for me to heed my own advice as I find myself sitting here this morning feeling sorry for myself. <BR> <BR> DH is away this week end and on the way home from picking up DS from work last night we hit a deer and totalled our car. I'm pretty sure that since the car is over 10 years old, we no longer have the necessary coverage to repair or replace it. I'm just sitt... Sat, 28 Aug 2010 10:56:14 EST Summer With SparkPeople; Challenging Some Old Distorted Thinking (kind of long): http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3533762 So, I thought it would be a good idea to take stock of some of the ways that I’ve changed my ideas and opinions into healthy attitudes to so many things. <BR> <BR> Before Spark People, I had always viewed physical activity as some kind of dark and mysterious entity better left for those who excel in it. I thought that eating healthy was only done in short spurts (otherwise known as dieting). <BR> <BR> Here, are some of the ways that I’ve challenged my beliefs over the summer and some of ... Fri, 13 Aug 2010 13:31:30 EST