HAPPYTOBEME79's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=HAPPYTOBEME79 HAPPYTOBEME79's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ So I did good all day... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6283196 ...and then around 9 pm U stuffed my face with cookie dough. Why do I do these awful things to myself. I'm not going to beat myself up over it. What is done is done. Today is a new day I can do it😜 Tue, 20 Dec 2016 05:46:52 EST Got a little carries away... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6276636 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/ba10ab2a-fb66-46fc-be71-43ca73cac9c4.jpg"> <BR> I realized late last spring that my pants were tight. My size tens hurt so I bought twelves for the summer. With the goal of falling back over the summer. Then life happened and so did a habit of fun summer cocktails that packed on more pounds then I could handle. Halloween came, I indulged, Thanksgiving came, I indulged. And had an epiphany. Damn I'm getting fat again :) Not cool. I can ... Mon, 5 Dec 2016 10:28:55 EST Feeling sorry for myself http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6275152 I read one of my blogs from three years ago. :( I was worried about not getting being able to push from 155 to 146, I was really stressing about it, made med role my eyes about myself because here I am back up to 185. I had a year of depression, and when I am depressed I eat, then I am depressed because I am eating. It is a vicious cycle. But I started a new job last year, bought a house, and I am feeling more confident and capable about the control I have on my own life. I am better now a... Fri, 2 Dec 2016 05:55:03 EST 3 days in a row http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6274645 Back on track to loose some of that Turkey and stuffing :) Be back to myself in no time Thu, 1 Dec 2016 05:27:29 EST Bad year made good http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5839711 I had a rough year in 2014. One I would rather not discuss -ever. As a result I have lost my focus of what is important in my life. I have become lazy, depressed, and stuck in my own negative emotions. <BR> <BR> My New Years resolution is to get back on track, <BR> schedule out my days like I did when I first started this. <BR> chart out time for cleaning, exercise, play, meditation, meal planning, and budgeting finances. <BR> <em>490</em> <em>217</em> <em>414</em> <BR> <BR> It... Sun, 28 Dec 2014 07:15:40 EST Review and Revival http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5599832 <em>425</em> <em>386</em> <em>30</em> <BR> <BR> I had been feeling disappointed in myself for gaining back ten of the forty-five pounds I lost. It took me two years to lose all of that weight and in one winter I went from 156 pounds to 166 pounds. It was a bitter pill. I knew it was coming. I had gotten overly confident. I relaxed on some of my hard rules. #1) put my snack in a small bowl #2) drink a full glass of water before each meal #3) exercise everyday <BR> <em>473</em> <... Mon, 20 Jan 2014 09:34:52 EST Scaling back didn't work, it made me crazy!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5391608 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/2/l1271179304.jpg"> <BR> <BR> <em>9</em> <BR> April was quite some time ago. It has been that long since I have been on here. I still weigh myself often, but not every other day like I used to. Slowly I have realized that I eat well. I exercise everyday, even if it is just playing with my kids in the yard, or gardening (that can be pretty intense sometimes Hoeing is a bitch :)) I drink lots of water everyday. I allow myself to have treats b... Mon, 17 Jun 2013 07:29:30 EST Scaling Back Down http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5312372 <em>67</em> <BR> This morning the scale read 155. <BR> I was relieved. <BR> For an entire day my mind was on nothing but the threat of 160lbs. I literally felt like my entire world was crashing down on me. <BR> <BR> Moving forward I will pay more attention to what I put in my mouth. Bathing suit season is right around the corner and my goal is to be toner, not fatter. <BR> <BR> I felt a little better after I went out yesterday and bought a new dress. A ten was a smidge tight. I know... Fri, 5 Apr 2013 09:17:26 EST Slip up http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5311025 <em>46</em> <BR> Major slip up. I have gotten cocky with my ability to melt off the pounds and began eating snacks that I normally wouldn't give a second look to. I have gained six pounds over Easter break. <BR> <em>448</em> <BR> <BR> I am so upset with myself. I need to shop for a dress to a wedding and was hoping to fit comfortably into a size 8, when now I think I will struggle to fit into a size ten. <BR> <em>346</em> <BR> I am so mad at myself because I have two more weddings ... Thu, 4 Apr 2013 07:15:22 EST Spring is here :) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5298243 I have done pretty well these past months. <BR> <BR> I haven't had time to commit to Spark People but have at least maintained. Student Teaching really through me for a loop. For two months I have done nothing but teaching, morning, noon, and night. I have been working all day teaching in a middle school, then I would grade papers and make copies for the next day to come home, say hello t o my family, and hide away to do my homework for the classes I take to accompany my internship. <BR> ... Sun, 24 Mar 2013 13:12:03 EST Not to shabby http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5212514 <em>215</em> <BR> <BR> It is January 18th, half way through the first month of the year and I am keeping to my goals for health and fitness so far. <BR> <BR> Every morning, especially on day that I don't feel so well, I get up early to do much needed stretches. Every otherday I add some strengthening exercises. I pack my lunch everyday so I can be sure that I always have a healthy snack and lunch. <BR> <BR> I almost go into the trap of buying sodas from the vending machine, but quick... Fri, 18 Jan 2013 06:43:21 EST The New Year so far... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5204789 So far so good. I wake up every morning and do my stretches, everyother morning I do sit ups and push ups and a few other toning exercises. <BR> <BR> My days have become stressful to say the least. I am student teaching in a middle school, but my mentor teacher was only their for three days before he left me for two weeks to undergo surgery on his elbow. (not fair, but whatever) So I have been helping the substitute by leading the class with the lesson plans that the teacher has left. They ... Sun, 13 Jan 2013 10:06:12 EST Happy New Years http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5183272 Here it is the first day of the new year, and the first day of my beefed up program. <BR> <BR> This year I will be tackling my biggest challenge; becoming a non-smoker, exercising, and losing the last 12 pounds in order to hit my goal. <BR> <BR> It will be tough and I know that it will be a long road, but I know that I can do it. I have come so far. <BR> <BR> Smoking I will, and have quit out right. I know this is tough but I have done it plenty of times before. I have to just do it for ... Tue, 1 Jan 2013 07:58:57 EST Success at the Holiday Party http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5174229 I was so nervous about going to my family Christmas party. Like I said in my last blog I have not seen some of these people since 40 pounds ago (last Christmas). Of course everyone noticed. I really felt reasured about my progress. The best compliment of all came from two people. I have two cousins that are absolute health nuts. <BR> <BR> The one has tried to give me advice on diet and exercise since I first started gaining weight 5 or 6 years ago. He looked at me and said "Wow." I don't kn... Sun, 23 Dec 2012 07:48:54 EST Planning for 2013 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5172745 2012 was an amazing year for me. I know that I have mentioned it a million times already but I am going to say it a million more. I LOST 40 POUNDS this year :) ! <BR> <BR> I still can't believe it. <BR> <BR> My husband can pick me up and I don't panic that I will break his back, instead it is exhilerating to know that he can lift me effortlessly. <BR> <BR> My brother is coming home from Florida tonight and I can't wait until he sees me. I am also so excited about attending my big family... Fri, 21 Dec 2012 09:12:31 EST Starting to think about the New Year http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5170803 When I started Spark People (again) in January of 2012 I had no idea that I would get this far. I have lost forty pounds in one year. I thought at most I would lose twenty. I exceeded my goal and now I need to think about next year. <BR> <BR> I haven't quite reached my goal weight. I have 12 more pounds to go but I don't want to be obsessive about that. I am happy where I am. I eat healthy, I feel good, and I am more confident than ever before. (who knew that not being the fat girl in the r... Wed, 19 Dec 2012 07:28:57 EST Christmas Countdown... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5158944 <em>389</em> <BR> <BR> For the past few years I have dreaded this time a year. I was always broke, my decorations were cheesy. While everyone else was in a good mood I was moody and irritable. <BR> <BR> I have recently came to the conclusion that relating holiday's with baking has probably been part of the problem. For the last five years I have spend Christmas locked inside baking cookies, pies, and cakes for everyone I know. I was also eating what I was baking. <BR> <BR> This Christm... Fri, 7 Dec 2012 07:01:19 EST Here is the plan.. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5154347 In my 30 somethings with 10-25 lbs left to lose group I have joined a lose 10lbs in 10 weeks challenge. <BR> <BR> Here is my perspective schedule: (*these are the actual numbers I will fill in along the way) <BR> Nov 30 -165 <BR> Dec 7-164 (*160 lbs) <em>244</em> <BR> Dec 14-163 (*158 lbs) <em>48</em> <BR> Dec 21-162 <BR> Dec 28-161 <BR> Jan 4-160 <BR> Jan 11-159 <BR> Jan 18-158 <BR> Jan 25-157 <BR> Feb 1-156 <BR> Feb 8-155 <BR> <BR> So by Feb 8 I should be 155. It seems like I have ... Mon, 3 Dec 2012 07:25:31 EST Thanks for your support :) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5150279 I know when I begin to struggle with this health journey I can always rely on my spark friends to remind me that it is ok to fall. A few bad days does not have to turn into a few bad weeks, months or years. I nipped my cravings in the bud by doubling up on the water and only had one snack- a healthy cheese and crackers. <BR> <BR> Thank you all, together we can do this :) <BR> (Even through the fattest holiday of the year) <BR> <BR> <em>443</em> Thu, 29 Nov 2012 08:06:27 EST Help I have gained 5 lbs in 3 days! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5149150 I know that I said I would get on Spark everyday during Thanksgiving to help ward off that bad evil temptation of pies, breads and oh so yummy evil food. <BR> <BR> I didn't get online not once and here I am feeling like a fat tub of lard. <BR> <BR> Help motivate me to move forward instead of falling back. I like the new me. I am so afraid the old me is sneaking in. Wed, 28 Nov 2012 07:05:35 EST Still losing... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5133011 Well, the weight isn't coming off. I have come to a plateau, however I have lost several pants sizes. I don't know how it is. Maybe my body has caught up with my weight. It took me four months to go from a 14 to a 12, but I managed to go from a 12 to a 10 in little more than a month. I feel so great, I have even managed to do a flip on the trampoline to the amazement of my kids. I would have never tried this a few months ago for fear of breaking the trampoline. <BR> <BR> I had to run out to... Mon, 12 Nov 2012 16:37:09 EST Walking with my daughter http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4999708 So, my 13 year old daughter was telling me as we watched the Olympic beach Volley ball finals that she wants to do that. I told her great. She plays indoor Volley ball for the Boys and Girls Club already and the season will start before we know it. So I promised her that I would help her train. <BR> <BR> We are starting tonight after dinner with a brisk walk. My intention is to step up the pace a bit each day until we can get to a comfortable job. I used to do this all the time, years ago, ... Fri, 3 Aug 2012 15:06:13 EST 25 lbs gone, 25 more to go http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4974724 I have finally met my halfway point. If I may say so myself "Damn I look good". lol. I finally updated my pics to reflect my mid-point success. I was disappointed with the picture at first because I still look so big, but once I uploaded it and set it next to my picture from last summer and there is a huge difference. My face is thinner, my belly is much less prominent, my arm are smaller. I was a size 16 last summer and now I am a 13. who knew there was so much difference in just 3 pant size... Tue, 17 Jul 2012 14:40:43 EST Wohoo! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4928739 <em>134</em> <em>345</em> <em>346</em> Well maybe not quite ready for the slinky dress yet but I have hit the 170's and have stayed constant around on 177 for a few weeks now. Today I woke up and the scale had hit 176.2 <em>242</em> to me. I feel great. Today I am going to a Graduation party and I am going to wear a cute dress, and I am going to look good in it. <BR> <BR> Its a great Day <em>67</em> Sat, 16 Jun 2012 09:19:22 EST I have finally hit a setback.... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4750733 But it is okay. I went out to dinner a few times last week. I was good at the restaurant but not so good about the left overs. I ate all of the left overs from hibachi in one sitting. There were a lot of scallops left and I scarfed them down like it was my last meal. A few days before that I ate a triple chocolate cake that the kids didn't like, I liked it too much. <BR> <BR> On top of it all I drank lots of cocktails. I think that is what did it. Although the food was too much the cocktail... Wed, 22 Feb 2012 06:41:14 EST Month #2 nearly over and I'm doing great! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4744423 Usually when I start a new diet and exercise regimine I can't get past the third week. This time not only have I stuck to my diet and exercised regularly but I look forward to working out, still. <BR> <BR> The food taste better, I don't even crave the bad stuff it seems so gross. <BR> Water is refreshing, I have had soda a few times but I don't get that urge to have it any more even if it is in the house. <BR> I look foward to going to the YMCA three times a week, I feel bad when I can onl... Sat, 18 Feb 2012 07:38:38 EST Right where I should be http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4730077 I was worried that since I have been sick, and inactive, for the last two weeks that I would have fallen behind my weight goals but I just logged in my new weight and I seem to be right on track. <BR> <BR> Yay me! 8 lbs lost. Many more to go. Thu, 9 Feb 2012 06:50:00 EST I am super motivated today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4688614 I had a great workout yesterday. I found myself doing the cross trainer elliptical machine at the gym and smiling like a goofball. At first I thought to myself 'what a dork, stop smiling' but then I remembered that I was there for myself not anyone else, so who cared what others were thinking, so what if I am a dork. I was having fun. <BR> <BR> Did I actually say that I WAS HAVING FUN WHILE EXERCISING? Yeah, I said that outloud. <BR> <BR> I surprise myself more and more everyday. An hour on... Wed, 18 Jan 2012 09:12:07 EST Week 3 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4686066 So far I have been a success. <BR> <BR> NO soda (and don't really miss it) <BR> no junk (don't miss that either) <BR> <BR> I have tried three new recipes (the family like two out of three, its a start) <BR> <BR> Exercise at least three times a week (I have even upped my routine to a hour long cardio from the half hour I was doing) <BR> <BR> Swimming has been a great way to get in some extra exercise for fun. After my cardio I hang out in the pool and tread some water, which happily I fou... Tue, 17 Jan 2012 06:50:10 EST Such a work out http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4682747 I upped my work out yesterday and man am I feeling it today. Ouch! For the first 2 weeks I was doing 30-40 minutes 3 times a week. Yesterday I decided that I was on a roll and it was time to up the ante. I went for 30 minutes on the crosstrainer and 30 minutes on the stationary cycling maching. I burnt about 400 calories plus I did some weight trainin yesterday. I felt great when I left last night but around 8pm the same night I started to feel sick (sore throat sick) I slept hard last night ... Sun, 15 Jan 2012 19:16:37 EST So far so good :) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4673660 I know that it has only been a week since me and my husband have committed to living a healthy lifestyle. But I have to give us props. Their has been a bottle of Pepsi on the floor of the kitchen since Sunday. My husband bought it to have a whiskey and soda or two while he watched to foot ball game. Well, he did actually only have two (rather than the 5+ he would normally have) and that bottle has sat their untouched since then. Even the kids have not asked for a glass. I was tempted at first... Wed, 11 Jan 2012 11:27:08 EST Ready for another good day http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4670582 Yesterday turned out to be a great day. I ate within my calorie range, and did not once eat in front of the TV. I also did not snack after 7pm. And I drank my eight glasses of water and I went out side to play with the baby (yes it was cold out but we survived) <BR> <BR> Today, however, may be a bit harder. My Aunt Flo came to visit me late lastnight and when she comes I crave chocolate and soda. Normally I would curl myself up on the couch with some lifetime my sugar and some midol. <BR> ... Tue, 10 Jan 2012 07:10:36 EST Another fine morning :) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4665804 I had a great work out yesterday and don't feel as sore for it. Breakfast was good. We had hardboiled eggs (which the kids actually liked), home made pancakes and bannanas. I think we covered most of the food groups there. <BR> <BR> We're slim on ingredients, so I need to plan a grocery trip. <BR> <BR> To keep our pantries healthy I am going to shop by my new list of staples and recipe ingredients. I decided that I am only going to plan a few dinners ahead until I know what my family will... Sun, 8 Jan 2012 10:05:58 EST Great Family Breakfast http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4663861 This morning worked out wonderfully. <BR> <BR> My muscles were sore from working out last night but I was full of energy. I made the family scrambled egges and cheese, toast and jelly, oranges, and a few thin slices of left over steak. I am proud of myself for making a healthy breakfast, I think I covered all of the basic food groups; grains, dairy, protein, fruit, oil. <BR> <BR> The great thing is that every one liked it and no one complained. <BR> <BR> It was fun to sit down and have ... Sat, 7 Jan 2012 11:27:25 EST Day 2 at the YMCA http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4657841 Me and my two year old arrived at the YMCA around 10am. We had talked about the trip since early this morning. I explained to her over and over the timeline of the trip. Encouraging her to respond. She knew what was going on we did the same thing on Monday. <BR> <BR> The plan was for Emma to play with the two year old while mommy got her workout done. Then we were going to play in the pool. Emma was okay with this plan, until we got to the two year old room. She wouldn't go in. We wandered a... Wed, 4 Jan 2012 19:37:18 EST First work out at the Y http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4653289 Joined the YMCA yesterday. Signed up the whole family. Dropped the baby off at the play area for an hour and peddaled away on the cycling machine for forty minutes. <BR> <BR> Yeah it was tiring, and boy am I out of shape but I pulled through and finished the full forty minutes including warm up and cool down. I held a steady 10 miles and hour and ended up going over 5 miles. <BR> <BR> Yeah I am proud of myself. <BR> <BR> For a treat I picked the baby up from the play area and we relaxed... Tue, 3 Jan 2012 07:10:14 EST Baking time is here again..... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4628893 The week before Christmas I usually spend baking cookies and yummy bread, and I eat nearly as much as I make. <BR> <BR> This year I am making: bannana chocolate chip bread, chocolate bark, sugar cookies, chocolate chip coolkies and oatmeal cookies (I can smell them baking now) <BR> <BR> I just wouldn't be Christmas if I did not bake and it is something that I love doing. <BR> <BR> However, this year my goal is to only taste my creations (not gorge on them). I love to bake and gift my deli... Sat, 17 Dec 2011 07:50:40 EST Time to grow up http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4618947 I have spent my adult life eating the way I wanted to eat as a child, whatever I want. All the chocolate, candy, and cakes I want, whenever I want. It is time for me to admit that I am not rebelling against my mother by eating as much junk as I want. I am only hurting myself and setting an awful example for my own children. <BR> <BR> Candy is meant for children and as an adult I should know better than to keep it in my house on a regular basis. Candy is supposed to be a treat not a major fo... Fri, 9 Dec 2011 10:42:56 EST Had a Thanksgiving slump http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4613204 But that's okay. I gained back a few pounds but I am not going to let it get me down anymore. I sulked about it for too long. 2 weeks. I have gone back to my healthy meal plan again but the weight is always harder to lose than it is to gain. <BR> <BR> I have confidence in my self. <BR> <BR> I served homemade pancakes with cooked apples for breakfast. <BR> <BR> Tonight is is kidney beans and rice for dinner. Yum! <BR> <BR> I wont let the holiday's get the best of me. Mon, 5 Dec 2011 11:43:32 EST Doing pretty good with my diet http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4588445 I was a little skeptical about beginning a semi-meatless, and totally processed free diet. It is hard to find things when you’re in a hurry, but so far that has only proven to make me think twice about whether I am really hungry or just want to stuff my face. <BR> <BR> McDonalds has been out of the question. Although it has only been a week I do pass several of them between home and school. I have thought about it, but the idea has been making my stomach turn, so I drive on by without hesit... Thu, 17 Nov 2011 10:39:49 EST No more field corn #2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4586593 I am protesting field corn #2, the corn that makes high fructose corn syrup and goes into just about anything that is processed. I am reading Michael Pollan's book Omnivores dilemma. I haven't even gotten through the first Part of the book and already I wanted to vomit at the thought of being completely corn fed. <BR> <BR> The whole idea of efficient farming is just ridiculous. Pushing cows to get from 80 lbs to 1200 lbs in 18 months (60 years ago it took a cow 4 years to gain that much weig... Wed, 16 Nov 2011 07:16:32 EST Argument with my husband spurred an exercise routine... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4568051 It really did. I got so angry that I didn't know what to do with myself so I went for a walk. A long walk, between a few acres of corn, then a bout mile down the road. The only reason I stopped there was because it was getting dark and cars could not see me walking on the curvy back road. <BR> <BR> I forgot how much I loved to take walks. I used to do it all the time growing up. In my twenty's I kept up a pretty good routine and even became quite a fit jogger. But as my twenties came to a ... Fri, 4 Nov 2011 10:29:11 EST A rough week it has been... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4235520 My Grandmother died late last week. (This is why I have not blogged regularly) Monday was her funeral, where I drank my fair share and ate more. The following week I binged and gorged at night. (the exact same thing I am not supposed to be doing) I have even added back five pounds and am going to start back at square one. <BR> <BR> Today is Monday, a new week. I am no longer going to allow myself to grieve with food. It doesn't help me and it doesn't help my children. In fact it only makes ... Mon, 16 May 2011 08:29:17 EST Messed up http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4227289 For the first time in quite a while I snacked after 7pm. I don't know why I ate. I wasn't necessarily hungry I just wanted to snack . I made the mistake of going to the gorcery store and buying a bunch of good snacks. <BR> <BR> I wasn't supposed to buy a bunck of snacks but I was starving when I went. Thu, 12 May 2011 07:33:36 EST My Grandmother is dieing... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4209085 And I ate my feelings last night. <BR> <BR> around ten o'clock I ate an entire king size milky way. <BR> <BR> I am too sad to care. <BR> <BR> My Grandmother is the bravest strongest women I know and I will not show my own weaknesses by eating my feelings. She would not want me to loose my strength. She is well into her eighties and anxious to meet her two dead husbands and my father. I should not feel sad I should feel happy that she is going home to meet the loved ones that she has miss... Wed, 4 May 2011 08:06:09 EST Neurology appointment http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4206799 I injured myself in January when I fell down the stairs in my house. I am a clumsy person and have done this before, except this time I hurt myself bad enough to go to the ER. <BR> <BR> I didn't break anything (that would have been much easier) Instead I have been dealing with a mysterious pain for four months. My PCP brushed me off for a few weeks, sent me for a few x-rays, shoved pain killers at me, none of it worked. He told me to give it time to heal and it will get better (even though ... Tue, 3 May 2011 09:18:05 EST KFC http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4204199 I was doing great all day yesterday. <BR> <BR> I even began My Nutrition Tracker. <BR> <BR> Then my mom shows up with Kentucky Fried Chicken. I am glad I was good all day long because that would have killed my diet. <BR> <BR> I am proud of myself for not over doing it though. Normally I would have had an entire chicken breast and a wing or leg with mashed potatoes and mac n' cheese. But I used self control and only had a thigh and a wing, two teaspoons of mashed potatoes, a dribble of g... Mon, 2 May 2011 09:29:17 EST Not such a great night. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4201804 Okay, I did not totally pig out but I did have a few too many pieces of candy. <BR> <BR> My husband grabbed a bag of cheetos (I love cheetos) and crunched on them at 9:30 at night. <BR> <BR> I wanted to punch him in the face as I sipped my hot chamomile tea. <BR> <BR> Instead I grabbed a few pieces of hard candy, then a few pieces of carmel candies and before I knew it I was throwing away at least 10 wrappers. I was ashamed and after such a good week I woke up feeling guilty. <BR> <BR... Sun, 1 May 2011 08:59:41 EST Getting through another day:) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4199375 I was successful again last night. I did not have any snacks after 7pm. <BR> <BR> Even as my husband sits next to me at this very moment with a big bag of chips I am using my will power to get me through. In fact I have no desire to sit here next to him watching him eat chips. He is watching a stupid baseball game anyway. I am going to go upstairs and read a book to keep my mind off food. <BR> <BR> Besides it is time to tuck the kids into bed. <BR> <BR> I have had a decent week so far. ... Fri, 29 Apr 2011 20:59:12 EST Still Here http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4197230 I did well this week. Yesterday I did well on my diet. <BR> <BR> I had no snacks after 7pm. I hardly even thought about snacking. <BR> <BR> I read my book for most of the night. (it is kind of hard to snack while you read) <BR> <BR> Maybe I should get back to reading at night instead of watching TV, because you have to look away from the book to reach your hand into a bag of chips. <BR> I lose my concentration, and my place on the page, so I just don't even think about it. <BR> <BR> TV,... Thu, 28 Apr 2011 19:24:54 EST