GOLDIELOCKSBEAR's SparkPeople Blog GOLDIELOCKSBEAR's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Up Up and Study Eating better for these last 12 days is already making me feel better and more energetic. Which is good because being 42 and having 2 small kids (one special needs) and having to study for my CPA exams... not easy. I need all the focus and energy I can get! Off to the library to study in about 45 mins so have a great day spark friends! Sat, 12 Jan 2013 12:14:35 EST SN son's heart So the good news about my SN (special needs) son's heart is that the likelihood of open heart surgery is fading but the bad news is that once again I had to hold him down while he was terrified for yet another medical procedure. He isn't cognitively able to understand an explanation that this is to make sure he is healthy. Which of course makes me want to eat thinking about my 6 year old screaming in terror and me having to hold him down so they can sedate him for his echo-cardiogram. <BR... Tue, 8 Jan 2013 14:05:22 EST Happy New Year! New year and my sister is getting married in the fall... so here I am AGAIN trying AGAIN. I don't want to be an obese maid of honor! Gratz to my beautiful sister and here is hoping its a motivational kick in the butt to get me going! <BR> <BR> So far I been about 2500 calories a day but I am starting from scratch. Been so long that I figured I better start with the spark streak and get used to journaling again for a week or 2. <BR> <BR> Happy New Year! Sun, 6 Jan 2013 12:13:30 EST Trying to stay positive Long time since I blogged here... 1 1/2 years. I of course gained it all back and have not lost anything... this week per usual if 100 things can go wrong they do. We are still squeaking by financially and of course our hot water heater decides to die. Add to that I need to have surgery again to have part of my girl bits removed to hopefully prevent cancer. SN son is losing his ability to cope when I reprimand him for hitting his brother and after losing 10 pounds recently I had a 4 day b... Mon, 15 Oct 2012 10:39:40 EST More Heartbreak September we had to put down our old girl Meatloaf kitty, then just 3 weeks ago I had to put down Chalcopyrite, a kitty I adopted over 17.5 years ago. Today my husband had to put down his kitty Copernicus, a kitty he adopted when she was 6 weeks old, he had her for almost 19 years. <BR> <BR> RIP dear furry friends. Until we meet again on the Rainbow Bridge. Mon, 11 Apr 2011 11:39:59 EST heartbroken 6 months ago we had to put down we had to put down Alighieri (aka Meatloaf) due to kidney failure and yesterday I had to put down my Chalcopyrite, my old kitty girl. Chal was easily 19 years old (I adopted her and her brother when they were probably about 1 1/2 years old) and has been slowly declining over the past 2 years but she was still healthy and happy and had a quality if life. Over the course of the last couple days she wasn't herself so I made a vet appt for her but not soon enough... Thu, 17 Mar 2011 07:37:27 EST It all comes down to I just put too much food in my mouth It all cones down to I just put too much food in my mouth but I have a ton of excuses why. Last semester was difficult. I am a stay at home mom of a special needs 5 year old and a mildly developmentally delayed almost 2 year old. My husband had lost his job and I was going half time to school at night. He had been out of work for several months and I was getting very scared for our future... esp for our SN son who can't have a lapse in medical coverage with all his preexisting conditions ... Wed, 16 Feb 2011 03:01:19 EST tired Waking up at 7:30 am week days was so nice... now that DH has a job again its 5:30 am mornings. Last night I got home from class after 10 pm and the night before Bebe (20 month old) was very upset and woke up at 3 am so I haven't been getting much sleep lately. And no matter how many times I ask DH is never going to take over and let me sleep in on a weekend, he just won't sooooo trying to find time to nap. Boy do I need to get studying tho its just a matter of days now before finals! <BR>... Fri, 3 Dec 2010 10:00:15 EST DH had a good first day! Well DH actually didn't hate his first day at the job he didn't want to have to take soooo WOOHOO! In fact he said it really wasn't that bad. I really hope it works out and they hire him as a full time employee in 3 months or sooner! And I hope that he doesn't hate it and maybe even likes it so he doesn't have to look for another job... well at least we are going to be ok! <BR> <BR> So my Personal Tax Accounting teacher actually thinks well of me... honestly I thought HE thought I was an ... Thu, 2 Dec 2010 09:09:22 EST It's easier to diet at home It's easier for me to eat healthy at my house... where I am the cook and I put the shopping list together. While visiting my parents I just didn't have the will power with all those tummy yummies calling my name. But now that I am back home I am cooking my food and measuring my portions and staying on track. <BR> <BR> My kids had a fantastic time at my parents. It was such a wonderful visit and it totally refuled my soul to push forward with life. So I have class tonight and class tomorr... Wed, 1 Dec 2010 15:56:58 EST Hiya all I'm back! Back with my boys from my parents... got in yesterday. Unfortunately my little plague carrier (SN son) has officially made 5 people sick now that my parents have it too <em>29</em> <em>24</em> <BR> <BR> I unfortunately am still sick ... it's a nasty one... and I have so much studying to do for my finals. <BR> <BR> I hope you all had a wonderful Tofurkey Day! Tue, 30 Nov 2010 10:02:25 EST GLB isn't here right now... please leave a message! Hiya spark friends! I am at my parent's house with my boys this week (thru Monday) so chances are you won't see me on very much! Keep sparking! Tue, 23 Nov 2010 19:29:30 EST Packing and Raining I was hoping to be on the road by 9:30 am but I think I am going to have to wait a little bit. The heavens have opened and its now a torrential down pour! Well I am sure my lil guys can use the extra sleep since we are all sick right now... well SN (special needs) son is actually just about over it. DH and Bebe (19 month old) are in the midst of it and its just starting for me... yay. <BR> <BR> Well I need to get going I have get the boys fed, finish packing, shower, load up the car and t... Mon, 22 Nov 2010 09:18:54 EST Grey Sunday Grey and ugly outside today. Boys are up DH is still sleeping and I am about to make myself breakfast now that my wee ones are enjoying theirs. <BR> <BR> I like to let myself enjoy Saturdays but I went way overboard yesterday. Sometimes hunger just grips me and all my tricks to fend it off just don't work. Drinking more water, eating slowly, drinking tea with meals, eating more protein, etc but it happens such is life... maybe TOM is coming soon. Honestly with me I could go 3 months and... Sun, 21 Nov 2010 10:51:04 EST keep on keeping on I am kinda dragging this morning... sooooo tired. My cold is starting to kick in so yay. I am driving home with my kids to see my parents on Monday so here is hoping my cold isn't terrible and I can stay focused on driving for over 6 hours! <BR> <BR> I picked my next couple classes at the local community college for the spring 2011 semester. I am kind of dissapointed ... the ones I wanted to take are either not offered at the building near my house or are offered during the accounting cla... Sat, 20 Nov 2010 10:54:48 EST Nice quiet day Not much to report. Got my step aerobics DVD in this morning and been having some fun with my sicky wee ones (on and off cranky with coughs and stuff noses). <BR> <BR> Did my online homework and I don't have class again for 2 weeks. On Monday me and the boys are driving home to see my parents for a week. DH starts his contract to hire position on Wednesday and is grateful that he won't have to deal with wife and kids his first couple days hehehe! <BR> <BR> Anyway that is all I hope you... Fri, 19 Nov 2010 18:34:13 EST Good Morning Thrusday! Ok DH's mood has dramatically improved. It started out Tuesday afternoon as miserable because the 2 full time jobs he was in final interviews with turned him down so he had to take the contract to hire job. But since then I have tried so hard to steer clear when he needs space and cheer him up when I can I think that he is loved and appreciated starting to sink in and clearing away the cranky. And I think he is looking forward to being employed again even if its not the job he wanted he IS... Thu, 18 Nov 2010 11:14:28 EST focus speed I am speed Busy day today. SN (special needs) son was well enough (poor lil guy had a nasty cold last 5 days) to go to school which is a good thing because he *loves* school. Bebe (19 month old) also has a cold but he is feeling fine and is his usually happy sweet loving self. <BR> <BR> Breakfast eaten, cleaned up after the boys, dishes done so now I need to get my quick step work out DVD done the shower then off to the library so I can get some studying in for my class tomorrow night. I finished th... Wed, 17 Nov 2010 10:08:31 EST Very bad job news for DH REcap: DH has been out of work for over 2 months and has been looking and interviewing and finally seemed to recently get some bites. We had 3 companies interested in him, 2 full time 1 contract. The contract is business casual dress code (he has never worked at a biz casual company so that means he needs to buy clothing and he is not going to go to a resale shop... just no compromise on that), he has to drive to the train station or take the bus there (or more likely we load up our two babie... Tue, 16 Nov 2010 15:00:41 EST Some not so great news & a cute quick story Ok get the not so great news done first... so DH has been out of work for over 2 months and has been looking and interviewing and finally seemed to recently get some bites. We had 3 companies interested in him its 2 now because one out right turned him down yesterday. They are a totally open source shop and don't even want to hear that the Windows operating system might be useful in some way shape or form. Don't get me wrong I am no Microsoft fan but you have to find a happy medium and use... Tue, 16 Nov 2010 11:20:59 EST RIGHT now DH is in a final interview for the job he wants RIGHT NOW DH is in the FINAL INTERVIEW for the job he wants. PLEASE positive vibes, positive energy, prayers, happy job thoughts... whatever you do just send him some please? <BR> <BR> He has been out of work for 2 1/2 months and finally found a great fit! It's a 30 minute drive one way (cuts his old commute down to 1/3 of what it used to be!) and he won't have to deal with trains and having to park over 1/2 mile from the train and running to catch it or paying $5 a day to park! The peopl... Mon, 15 Nov 2010 14:31:17 EST donated blood For the first time in 10 years I donated blood yesterday! Last time I did I ended up with a migraine and tunnel vision but then I hadn't eaten for a while. So yesterday I ate a good breakfast and then I went (DH went first then I did) and donated whole blood and it only took 6 minutes! <BR> <BR> The nice thing is they also check your iron and cholesterol for you and hey free snacks and juice right? <em>211</em> <BR> <BR> I didn't donate for a long time because I was trying to get preg... Sun, 14 Nov 2010 09:55:44 EST all sick.... Ugh all 4 of us are either sick or are coming down with a cold. SN (special needs) son probably brought it home from school. Bebe (19 month old) is just starting to get sick as are DH and myself and SN son is full blown coughing up a storm poor little guy. <BR> <BR> BUT no rest for me I HAVE to get to the library and get caught up in my Thursday night class! <BR> <BR> Got my work out DVD in this morning and darn it no more excuses I am going to do it! DH will have a job again sooner th... Sat, 13 Nov 2010 00:27:41 EST still smiling from DH's job offer Still basking in the glow of DH finally getting a job offer... its been 2 1/2 months... FINALLY ... here is hoping with the leverage of this offer he can get the job he wants that's a lot closer to home... things are looking up! Fri, 12 Nov 2010 00:21:07 EST DH GOT AN OFFER!!! DH GOT A JOB OFFER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<BR>!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU GOD! <BR> <BR> Ok its not great, its a contract job... that means no health insurance, no paid days off, no 401(k), no paid holidays, no health insurance, BUT it's an offer. It's a crazy long commute again tho... maybe longer... The last job he had (the one he got laid off from) was about 1 1/2 hours each way which was driving to the train station and the long train there. This one is using a different public... Thu, 11 Nov 2010 19:13:52 EST Class tonight With me luck on my take home exam! I am turning it in today. <BR> <BR> Spent a lot of time running around outside with my boys... last couple days of nice weather! <BR> <BR> I hope you all have a beautiful day! Wed, 10 Nov 2010 14:43:29 EST fuzzy brain I feel like I have fuzz in my brain today. I get to the library to focus on tax accounting reading and homework only to realize I forgot the list of questions and a calculator. So I went over my take home exam for that class again and found more mistakes. I just want Wednesday to be over already and this stupid exam turned in. <BR> <BR> In addition to turning in the take home exam we have to read and do the next chapter as well. I of course also got assigned the biggest most difficult pr... Tue, 9 Nov 2010 21:00:04 EST Best birthday yet Ok turning 40 sucks... a LOT... BUUUUT my lil SN (special needs) son made is just wonderful. DH bought a small cake that was cut in to 4 sections so each of us could have the kind we liked. DH got the German chocolate cake, I got the piece with the chocolate cake and chocolate frosting and SN son got the white cake with white frosting. When DH brought the cake out my dearest lil SN son said: <BR> Happy Birthday Mommy! <BR> <BR> I was so overwhelmed with love and happiness I just about cri... Mon, 8 Nov 2010 12:27:05 EST hbd to me It was so nice that DH let me actually sleep in just this once. Especially since I keep bringing up that I would like to be able to sleep in.... just every once in a great while. <BR> Oh wait. <BR> Right. <BR> I'm up. <BR> LOL <BR> Happy 40th birthday to me... <BR> <em>211</em> Sun, 7 Nov 2010 08:55:12 EST le sigh Poor lil Bebe (19 month old) doesn't feel well so I am tired and am taking a little me time. Not much to report except that I don't want tomorrow to come... please don't make me turn 40? Sat, 6 Nov 2010 20:01:05 EST Coffee Coffee is starting to become a crutch for me again. I was using it to help me get myself out of my depressive funk... a little stimulant in the morning to make me feel more awake. For a while I was so good only using it only Wednesday and Thursday mornings so I would be awake for my night classes on those 2 nights. I am going to wean myself off of it again, I still really need it to get going in the morning. I usually have about 3 cups of regular coffee mixed with 3 cups of decaf (I brew ... Fri, 5 Nov 2010 11:00:38 EST getting back in order I am getting the house back in order FINALLY! Depression and too much homework/studying/reading/class projects etc etc etc and the house fell behind by several weeks and in this house weeks are MONTHS. <BR> <BR> 4 cats, 1 shepherd/husky mutt, 2 small kids, 1 DH out of work = fur and food everywhere! I am getting it done and will hopefully be done by tomorrow. AND I am cooking a lot again. When DH had several interviews and the future looked bright again we ordered in a couple times, ate ... Thu, 4 Nov 2010 12:39:32 EST bone marrow donor I'm signing up to be a bone marrow donor, its something I wanted to do for years but couldn't (going thru IVF for years then high risk pregnancy then mom to a micro preemie etc etc etc). <BR> <BR> Well now I am turning 40 in 4 days and its my birthday gift back to the world. When SN (special needs) son was in the NICU he has 12 of his 13 blood transfusions. A perfect stranger donated their blood and saved my sons life over and over (a 1 pound 6 ounce baby doesn't need a lot of blood to get... Wed, 3 Nov 2010 09:01:50 EST study study study Took Halloween weekend off to spend time with my kids so today I ended up in the library studying for 6 hours... now I have a headache and I need to go to bed as soon as the boys will let me. <BR> <BR> I hope you all had a great day! Tue, 2 Nov 2010 20:48:40 EST Maybe next year We tried several times to gently get SN (Special Needs) son interested in trick or treating. He did so well at school on Friday. But he had melt down after meltdown... one of which was in the middle of the street not good. DH managed to get him to try one house but then another meltdown. Hopefully he will be ready to try again last year. Mon, 1 Nov 2010 09:03:30 EST HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!!! Here is hoping this is the last year I have to wear the "FAT WIFE" costume for Halloween! I hope you all have a safe and FUN day! Sun, 31 Oct 2010 15:37:38 EST one foot in front of the other Ok so my 2nd exam for my Intermediate Accounting I class is done... hope I did well but we shall see. Now I have a take home for my Personal Income Tax class due in 1 1/2 weeks and a research project for the same class due this Wednesday. <BR> <BR> I wanted to have the energy to bake cookies for SN (Special Needs) son's Halloween class today but I am just too tired after my exam. I was working on the test from 6:30 pm until about 9 pm then went to Target to buy a Halloween t-shirt for SN s... Fri, 29 Oct 2010 01:00:46 EST Yet more car woes I have a test at 6:30 pm Thursday. I also have class Wednesdays from 6:30 pm to 9:20 pm. DH still has no job... so now my choices to getting to my exam tonight are: <BR> -the car that doesn't really have front breaks any more <BR> OR <BR> -the car with the dead battery <BR> <BR> pick one... heh <BR> <BR> Fortunately the nice guard at the community college jumped my car and I drove it to the local mom & pop mechanics (key in their door with a note "dead battery!") and they can replace the b... Thu, 28 Oct 2010 00:37:54 EST yuck The thing about depression isn't just the awful feeling of being depressed: always tired, small things seems insurmountable, quick to anger, and in my case uncontrollable urge to eat. <BR> <BR> The worst thing is I just don't feel like me. I hate that. I am glad I am coming out of it. The results are in though... I gained back at least 5 pounds, the house hasn't been cleaned in a while, laundry has piled up so there is now my guess easily 7 loads all to be cleaned, dried, and put away... ... Wed, 27 Oct 2010 17:25:31 EST back at it Hoping for a good days the rest of this week! Tue, 26 Oct 2010 22:24:37 EST trying Bebe (19 month old) had his evaluation today by a speech pathologist and developmental therapist. The DT thinks his play is normal so no concerns there but as I know all too well Bebe's speech has fallen way behind. In fact its regressed, he used to say 'mama' and 'ball' but now he just makes noises. The speech therapist is such a lovely lady, one of those people you meet thru a business relationship but you keep in touch with as a friend. She said (and I quote) "Don't worry he will be fi... Mon, 25 Oct 2010 14:45:23 EST Monday Here is hoping Monday is a wonderful day for all of us! I really really REALLY need a good day! Sun, 24 Oct 2010 19:34:07 EST yob DH didn't feel like his face to face interview on Friday was as good as he hoped. Well just the same here is hoping that come Monday they make him a good offer and DH is gainfully employed before the beginning of November! Sat, 23 Oct 2010 22:17:53 EST Elvis Wedding I was married in Vegas by Elvis 9 years ago today! Fri, 22 Oct 2010 01:09:02 EST Ok focus Today I am going to focus on getting myself back under control. It's been a bad week. <BR> <BR> Well Bebe (19 month old as of 2 days ago!) is up and I have to get SN (special needs) son ready for the bus which will be here in 10 minutes so wish me luck (I don't know what came over me I haven't been this out of control since January of this year!) and I hope you all have a spartacular day! Thu, 21 Oct 2010 09:02:24 EST Friday DH has his interview for the IT music gig this Friday afternoon. Positive thoughts for my DH this Friday that he get this job, that it pay at least what he used to make (the job he got laid off from ... we were just getting by on that), and that he doesn't hate this job (he *hated* his last job so getting laid off was a blessing in disguise). <BR> <BR> That and our car needs new brakes and some work and that's going to cost at least $900 and ... they don't take payment plans! So DH needs a... Wed, 20 Oct 2010 09:21:07 EST oblivion I have eaten myself in to oblivion last couple days... halloween candy... pizza you name it. Why am I so depressed now that DH has a serious face to face interview? I don't remember the last time I was this out of control! His days of unemployment are numbered and yet I am depressed... Tue, 19 Oct 2010 15:36:15 EST IT Gig at Music Company DH is on the phone doing a phone interview with the Music Company who are looking for a Network/Sys Admin Guru!! <BR> <BR> Sending DH 'get the IT music gig' vibes! <BR> <BR> Please let this be a good job and please let them give him at least what he used to make! <BR> <BR> UPDATE: <BR> OK 40 min interview w/ hiring manager went well so now he is getting a 2nd call from the other Senior Sys Admin in about an hour... here is hoping that goes realllllllllllllllllly well! <BR> <BR> 2nd UPDA... Mon, 18 Oct 2010 14:06:24 EST Gettin it done! 2nd Intermediate Accounting I exam in less than two weeks. Due this coming up Thursday is a LOT of homework (both written and online) plus extra credit (added to my exam grade) and go go go me its mostly done! I HAVE to get to the library more often because there are no wee ones attaching themselves to me or big sweet ole doggie girl looking at me with her brown eyes wanting attention and I don't feel compelled to keep checking spark people to see what my SP friends are doing! <BR> <BR> I ... Sun, 17 Oct 2010 01:35:56 EST SN son's social skills SN (special needs) son has autism spectrum disorder. He was a micro preemie (1 lb 6 oz at birth) and by the time he was 3 years old has had more medical procedures than any adult I know. That said my kid is amazing! His private speech therapist takes him for walks. Today she told me he is looking at her less for facial cues and he is getting much better in stores with her. <BR> <BR> Sometimes I lament the choices I made, like getting degrees in very esoteric fields that I can't get a ... Sat, 16 Oct 2010 00:48:53 EST