GLENMORRISGIRL's SparkPeople Blog GLENMORRISGIRL's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community From Fear to Fearless I find myself embarking on another weight loss journey. I've logged a lot of miles on this path, up and down the scales - it's insane. But everytime I journey downward, or upward for that matter, I do so with more wisdom. My fear though, is that I will return one day. I've had several good weight losses in the past 30 years. I've lost over 30 lbs several times, only to regain it, and another 20 each time. So here I sit at 315 - yikes! <BR> <BR> Obviously, I don't blame weight loss, for... Sat, 11 Feb 2017 22:45:33 EST Identifying my Larger Goals Today's Spark Coach asked me to think about my larger goals - what will I do to improve my fitness once the weight comes off? Hmmm...... I've been thinking about exercise as a means to an end rather than an ongoing commitment - doesn't sound very clever, does it? <BR> <BR> My real goals for losing weight are likely common to most - comfort in my own skin. I hate feeling the excess weight on my body. It doesn't feel good to feel my stomach on my legs, or see my double chin in photos. I'm... Sun, 3 Aug 2014 17:26:12 EST Lessons learned over the winter....... Okay, so I'm writing away, even though my previous blogs probably have under a dozen comments in total. C'mon people!!!! I don't want to become a "regular", to have my blogs featured every day. But..... some support and feedback would be much appreciated :) Thanks!!!! <BR> Okay, so over the winter I gained a bit. Okay, it was 15 lbs, I admit it. Why? Two really good reasons, well, if by good I mean obvious. First, I gave up exercise during this dreadfully cold winter that lasted FOREVE... Fri, 9 May 2014 09:10:56 EST Worn out Shoes! I've worn out my running shoes! To be perfectly honest, they are a pair I've had for many years but just started wearing around a year ago - about the time I began walking diligently. Having not worn them through this brutal winter, I have noticed how worn out they are - hole starting in the toe box where my baby toe might pop out one day, tread bare and colour worn out of the sole = pride. I am so proud of these shoes and of me for having worn them out. <BR> <BR> <img src="http://phot... Thu, 10 Apr 2014 11:35:22 EST So I'm here..... I've recently slipped, fallen, let go, got lost, fell off - pick a metaphor for haven't been tracking, have been eating whatever, and have exercised only sporadically. That's me. Since before Christmas. It's not like I wasn't aware, oh I was quite aware of what I was doing. At first I was amazed there were now consequences. For a week or two I'd go up a pound or two but then lose it. Over Christmas I gained 5 pounds - considering what I was eating and how little I exercised, that is qui... Mon, 24 Mar 2014 11:22:23 EST The power of hope <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I found this picture on Twitter today and am inspired by it's power. This is not a political post. Disregard the politics. Imagine two nations torn apart by civil unrest. Both pushing back against their governments. After many months of fighting, one has reached it's first major goal - to oust their totalitarian government. Amongst these heady and uncertain times, Ukranians reach out to a nation half way arou... Tue, 25 Feb 2014 18:24:11 EST Spinning Plates So my daughter got spinning plates for Christmas. Yes, the kind you see at the circus or street performers use. She attended a circus camp offered at a local theatre and mastered the art of spinning, more or less, in a day :) Which, has been interesting - a goose egg on her forehead where the plate landed - FOUR TIMES - yesterday!!!! You have to know her though, she iced it each time for a minute and persevered. In fact, she is fiercely proud of her perserverence (which, sometimes is rea... Mon, 30 Dec 2013 10:45:13 EST Weight bias :( I was just on twitter and came across this piece on teacher<BR>ess/dr-brad-johnson/weight-bias-the-bu<BR>lls-eye-of-bullying/. Nothing here will be news to anyone who has struggled with their weight - we know we are sanctioned targets. Bullying through weight bias is a damned if you do and damned if you don't situation. We all knew it was time to I something about our health long before we took action. What stopped us? For too many of... Mon, 30 Sep 2013 21:29:44 EST Thank You! Every day I read one of your success stories or blogs, or I watch a video. Always I am amazed at the journey you have all taken. You've met up with challenges and conquered them, you've had successes, you've had to back track. As much as your successes inspire me, I pay particular attention to the hurdles you've overcome. <BR> <BR> All of us will have mishaps: we'll relapse into old(bad) habits and regain some of our weight. Before I joined Spark People I used to be really hard on myself... Fri, 13 Sep 2013 19:51:57 EST Week of much great news! First, none of you will know this, but I recently had surgery for pheochromacytoma. Today I learned that it was a benign tumor! There was only a feint chance it would be malignant, but anyone whose stared down that barrel will tell you it's real enough. There is a chance of recurrence but I will be monitored ongoing to ensure we catch it. <BR> <BR> Second great news, not as eye-catching but made my heart soar. I had an epiphany yesterday after blowing it at Taco Bell. My resolve redu... Wed, 21 Aug 2013 16:13:56 EST going over So after two weeks of nuttin' I was finally making progress on the scales - I know, NOT the only indication but for me the most tangible. Today is my anniversary with my husband - 15 years of wedded bliss (most of the time). We went out for lunch and now I'm obsessing b/c I am already way over my calories and sodium and fat....... Such a change from a month ago, but seriously hoping I don't "fall off the wagon". Think I need to balance my thinking? Thu, 15 Aug 2013 15:42:50 EST Let me count the things I have to lose..... I love reading the success stories of others, if you've posted your story THANK YOU!!!! Your stories put it all in perspective: it isn't about perfection, no one did it in a month, and you're all happier now. Having lost 15 lbs, I still have over 100 to go. So while I'm pleased with my progress thus far I need motivation to get through the next 100+. <BR> <BR> What do I have to lose? Plenty!!!!! First, undaunting self conciousness. I am constantly aware of my size, my profile, and how... Tue, 13 Aug 2013 08:04:55 EST Moderating moderation Man Spark Coach has set a challenge for me today! Moderation, eh? Heck, if I knew about moderation I wouldn't be here, or at least not here in this condition. Tough one for me, anyone else? <BR> <BR> See, I'm an all or nothing kinda gal. My instinct is not to sit and wait it out. My instinct is to DO, DO, DO!!!!! Procrastination causes me stress so if I know something is to be done, why not do it now? Like right now?!?!?!?! Yes, perhaps it is a little OCD. Hot and cold if you will... Sat, 10 Aug 2013 13:50:08 EST Grabbing the pelican by the throat! I've seen a poster of a pelican eating a frog. Although he's halfway gone, the frog tenaciously wrings the pelican's throat. I think the caption is "Never Give Up!!!" How appropos for all of us here. There are many times in any meaningful journey where we feel like the frog: doomed to a certain failure. Do you grab the throat of the pelican and fight for your goals? <BR> <BR> Sometimes we do "fight back" by grabbing the pelican's throat. We get those running shoes on and attack a wor... Fri, 2 Aug 2013 12:36:56 EST Letter of Encouragement This is a letter of encouragement, to myself and to everyone else who might be doubting themselves or losing the faith! <BR> <BR> You are strong enough. You've made it to this point, wherever that might be. You took the initiative to sign up to SparkPeople. You've tracked nutrition, fitness, and wieght - you've tracked the water you've drank!!!! At some poiint you recognized that determination, it brought you here. After all, you can't fail if you never tried. Acknowledge this set bac... Tue, 30 Apr 2013 21:32:10 EST My Motivating Factors Everyone has a reason to adopt a healthier lifestyle. I have one encompassing goal that breaks down into smaller goals ~ a more active "funner" lifestyle and more physical involvement. Don't get me wrong, I'm not relegated to a scooter, but I sometimes find myself approaching activities with apprehension - "can I do it?", "for how long?", "what will I look like?". This overlying theme breaks down into several concerns. <BR> <BR> 1) I'm currently on medication for extremely high blood pr... Mon, 29 Apr 2013 09:27:43 EST The reports tell the story! So I've been "re"-active on SP for almost 2 months now and have lost 5 lbs. Although I've significantly increased my activity level and have been much more mindful of calories, this meagre loss is somewhat disappointing. I've re-focused to become process driven, for long term success and it's taken a LOT of determination not to let the scales get to me. So you can imagine my delight when I discovered the reports feature on SP! <BR> <BR> Daily Calorie Differential :) It allows you to s... Tue, 2 Apr 2013 19:27:11 EST Self Acceptance: It's all a head game. So again, another Spark blogger has inspired some thinking. For a while now I've been pestered by a nagging self doubt: is pursuing a healthier lifestyle really just a disdain for who I am now? <BR> Let me clarify, I like who I am. I love my life. I never hold off on pursuing dreams until I've reached a goal weight, if it's worth doing, it's worth doing NOW. BUT, I often feel judged. Whether it's real or just in my head as I suspect it sometimes is, people think less of me for bei... Wed, 27 Mar 2013 09:39:29 EST Retiring the Scale After carefully weighing over the matter I've decided to officially do it - I'm tucking away my scale. I'm not going to "chuck it" - I'm just not going to visit it for a while. Instead, I'm going to track my nutrition and exercise with greater commitment. After all, when I'm doing what I should be here, the scale will eventually reflect the changes. <BR> <BR> I feel I must avoid the scale to allow myself to focus on the changes to my lifestyle and not a number on the scale. Right now, ... Wed, 13 Mar 2013 15:08:27 EST Just do it anyway... So I've been "doing" SparkPeople for a couple of weeks now and the scale is not budging. At all. Actually, it is - it goes down 2 pounds, then back up two pounds. In two weeks, I think I've lost less than a pound. It's frustrating. It's tempting to just give up. <BR> <BR> Well, not really. Because the only thing more depressing than being at this (lack of) fitness level would be not working towards a higher fitness level. After reading Pixielicous's blog today about loving yourself,... Fri, 8 Mar 2013 09:06:14 EST Spark Points My son asked me about Spark Points the other day, he didn't understand why I would care if they didn't lead to some material gain - for him that would mean a new Lego set or maybe a video game. I had really never thought about Spark Points with any determination, but as I explained it to him it occured to me that: <BR> <BR> Spark Points are important b/c they are a way to measure healthy choices. Tracking food, drinking water, exercising have all been proven to contribute to increased fitn... Sat, 23 Feb 2013 17:57:54 EST consistency I recently attended my son's football banquet where CFL player Henoch Muamba spoke to the players about success and how to get there. Henoch told them about the 3 C's - consistency, courage, and confidence. <BR> <BR> Consistency has stuck with me - I have had an epiphany of sorts. My weight loss journey has been inconsistent and as a result I have put forth a great deal of effort (cumulatively) with very little progress. If you've been here it's a horrible place, it's hard trudging and ... Tue, 19 Feb 2013 22:17:51 EST Getting Active I've just "re"started an exercise program. Using SparkCoach has helped me to accept that exercise is not an all or nothing proposition, that the little steps add up to a summative gain. Yesterday I walked the dog in the rain, it didn't start off as much of a rain and I thought it would stop soon enough. Then I got out there and it began to pour, I'm talking torrents of rain. I persevered and by the time I was home I was drenched, completely soaked down to my socks. The good news is ... Thu, 9 Aug 2012 10:01:25 EST Taking it seriously I've struggled with my weight my whole life, I've been up and down the scales so many times - each loss resulting in a 20+ lb weight gain within a year or two. That's 20 lbs from my original start. I have tried diets and conclude that "dieting" doesn't work. I think mainly because the dieting mindset is temporary vs. lifestyle changes that imply long term adherence. <BR> <BR> I've been active most of my life, until recently, in the last few years I've become extremely sedentry without... Tue, 7 Aug 2012 19:29:22 EST