FALLINTOFLIGHT's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=FALLINTOFLIGHT FALLINTOFLIGHT's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ 6 week- COR challenge http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5392212 Today is day 1 of the next six weeks for COR challenge on bodybuilding.com presented by Cellucor. I am excited for the new inspirations and motivation for continuing my jounrney of health and fitness. I am already proud of all I have accomplished, even with my slip ups, and backslides, I have maintained amazing results. My lifestyle is something I would have rolled my eyes at myself for even dreaming this could be me! I am active, I am confident, I throw my swim suit on and head down to the p... Mon, 17 Jun 2013 15:36:01 EST muscle monster http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5353040 well, let me tell you... I am the 'I've been working my ass off for one week like a mad women and deserve results type' :] <BR> I also have the genetically disposition to gain muscle like a mad women. I don't need protein powder to start bulking. If I use these muscles, they grow. I am okay with this. I enjoy lifting weights and I've learned to incorporate a massive amount of cardio to my week 40-60 minutes after I finish my sets, plus my mileage warm up. So burning an insane amou... Sat, 11 May 2013 11:29:50 EST Fat Assassin. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5346453 The Fat Assassin. <BR> It isn’t a typical 20 min jog on the treadmill. It’s Earphones in, conversation out. Mouthing the words to the music as I run my mile warm up. Heart pumping, blood warming, giving it my all. I lift to the beat with sweat pouring, dripping from my face. I lift heavier until my muscle shake until I drop the iron before it hits my fkn face. I feel done, but I’m not finished. Sip that water, deep breath, music up, getting amped, and I’m right back in it. This is when it co... Sun, 5 May 2013 17:07:12 EST How did I not know? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5344826 2 eggs + 1 banana = banana pancakes? <BR> <BR> I'm serious. &&totally delish <BR> Am I the only one just discovering this? Ive been eating clean and hadnt heard of this magical early morning, lunchtime, late night snack of goodness and wholesome nutrition. How is that even possible?!?! <BR> <BR> 2 ingredients, I cooked mine with coconut butter, topped with cinnamon. yum. <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/7/5/l755836992.jpg"> Fri, 3 May 2013 22:27:34 EST Training Contract http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5343308 I, Siena Lyn, commit myself fully with mind, body, and spirit to live, breath,eat,sleep,and dream fitness, health, weight loss, and self love for 142 days. From 3.2.13 to midnight September 21, 2013. Marking the end of summer and the beginning of a Sexy & Carefree Siena Lyn. <BR> This is my re-commitment to health & weight loss. I will run, swim, walk, cycle, hike, and lift my way to a happier & healthier Siena Lyn. I will sleep, laugh, clean, hydrate,workout,and eat my way to reach m... Thu, 2 May 2013 13:34:57 EST Ready For Answers http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5303226 I am very in touch with my body but am also quick to self diagnose valid reasons for why I might be feeling 'lack luster'. "I have true insomnia- that's why I'm tired". "I just forgot to take my vitamins". "I haven't been working out" or "eating enough?" or "I ate too much"..etc etc but I have hit an energy depletion wall. Symptoms I have had off and on since I was a teen have hit ten fold, daily for over a month now. Random exhaustion, rapid heart rate, nausea, loss of breath, dizziness, ina... Thu, 28 Mar 2013 12:39:49 EST kicking that BIG fear! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5296522 ... I had a last minute trip to California to help care for my gramps after he had a fall. He is fine but there were big changes needing to be made and the loving burden of helping our gramps falls upon my older sister, brother, and I. Its been this way since we were in high school. Taking turns to put our lives on pause, we love him so we do it with as little bitching as possible. That said, going home is always emotionally draining. I grew up in a small town counting the days until I could ... Fri, 22 Mar 2013 19:14:07 EST Maintaining-ish http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5254773 Honesty time... I have bobbled back and forth between the same 10 pounds for over a year now. So in essence I have accidentally maintained a 165-155 range. Now I am not overly depressed/disappointed but this isn't exactly the progress I have set out for and laid out plans for again and again. I also cannot be gravely disappointed since I know the major culprit was when I had MRSA- not only is it very scary to be that ill for that long but it causes your metabolism to slow down to protect your... Mon, 18 Feb 2013 11:33:52 EST Houston http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5251764 Well. I like it here, I really do. I am settled into the new apartment, minus a few boxes *cough*. I am learning to love the germ, I mean the gym. I haven't taken the opportunity to enjoy the free group classes my apt complex offers, yet. I miss my friends... I miss my workout buddies. I dont know what I am doing wrong but I just cant seem to find my new partners in crime and fitness. I am kinda stressing over it. This city is so big and I want someone near by. I am only a mile from reliant ... Fri, 15 Feb 2013 14:54:54 EST Falling into Flight. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5149525 This blog is to pump myself up for todays interview... even though its just the practice interview I cant help but be nervous. I am fine with public speaking but one on one or small groups make me soooo flipidy doo nervous! Id be happier being subpoenaed by the supreme court to testify lol, srsly though. So, I thought if I did a recap of who I am, where I have been, and how I got to where I am...well... I just might feel a tad bit more relaxed. <BR> <BR> My name is Siena Lyn, though online ... Wed, 28 Nov 2012 13:03:22 EST Just Siena. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5148438 So I took yesterday off and oh boy was it needed. Today I feel amazing! I was a bit slower than usual for my morning run but I had fun!!! Afterwards I hit the shower, artnt those just the best after a long workout? I found myself being a little nit picky over some problem areas in my reflection and just ab kicked myself when I snapped out of that momentary laps of judgment... I had just finished 5- 12 min miles... My body is damn fkn amazing! I can be such a silly girl. It isn't that I am up... Tue, 27 Nov 2012 13:31:47 EST lackluster update...sniff, sniff http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5146977 ready for some dizzy minded ramblings.... <BR> So so so under the weather :[ and lets face it, no one likes being sick. We all turn into big babies. My husband and daughter are sick as well, for once we all came down with this same stuff together so at least we are getting it over and done with in one coughing, sneezing, irritated, runny nosed mess! <BR> My diet, calorie intake, water intake has been off the program for 4 days. Note this coincides with the holiday leftovers in the house. BUT... Mon, 26 Nov 2012 10:54:22 EST Making myself proud! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5140340 Sunday was my 'off day'. My muscles thank me for relaxing and sticking to stretching even though it would have been a gorgeous day for an afternoon run and by evening I had barely any residual soreness and felt like working out. I didn't, instead I finished off my my day with family time, hit my core with some crunches and I headed to bed early. I was back and at it this morning, I did my one hour of jogging AND let me tell you, I feel rejuvenated. After kicking ass all week and feeling sore,... Mon, 19 Nov 2012 11:32:00 EST Holy Soreness Batman! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5138793 I have been taking my fitness, eating, and health more seriously these past 3 days than ever before... if you can believe that! I am sore, grumpy, tired, frustrated, sore, tired, and sore, oh and very very grump!!! <BR> Literally my body is practically burned out and I am crazy enough to be doing this on purpose. Thankfully tomorrow is my first 'off' day and I can not be happier for that. Hopefully, Monday brings a new outlook because deep down I know that what I am ever so diligently putti... Sat, 17 Nov 2012 21:51:06 EST adding chapters... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5136579 These past 6 months of my quest for health and fitness has felt a lot like a stale mate or writers block. Like, my story isn't the end yet. I know there is more to come, more to experience, more to conquer. I live a healthy lifestyle yet I still have goals in sight and know to my core there is more over yonder waiting to be discovered! <BR> This may be one of those times. A new chapter may very well be revealing itself. Part of being recognized as a SP motivator was being excepted as a SP su... Thu, 15 Nov 2012 16:54:17 EST Sparkling for 2 years now! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5096346 Tomorrow marks my second year with Spark People! Being part of the Spark community has been a great experience! Last night I completed a questionnaire on my journey as a success story. I was greatly reminded how wonderful this community is and the thanks that I have continued to pay forward. <BR> This is an excerpt from one of my answeres: <BR> '...when I found Spark People. I was still angry, hurt, the victim and I was allowing people who were hurting me, victimizing me, be part of my life... Fri, 12 Oct 2012 10:56:15 EST 1 yr progress pics http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5091239 Despite appearing mostly upbeat and thrilled with my progress, which I am- hello endorphins! I have been experiencing an internal struggle. This year I haven't lost a single pound. I am working hard, I am eating right and as a result I am stronger, faster, and healthier. Yet, I have in fact gained 3.2 lbs. I know, I know, muscle weighs more, take your measurements. Well, my measurements have gone up as well, 1 inch on my waist, 2 inches at my hips, 1 inch on my thigh, 2 on my arms. It's fr... Mon, 8 Oct 2012 12:04:59 EST The break up. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5083657 2 week countdown to 27th Birthday. Ooo boy. <BR> I am super happy with where my fitness is at. My muscle strength is back, better than before this summers illness took me down. My endurance is up better than before to. I've been running a quick 2 miles every morning, making sure to take the route with the tough hill and sprinting the last .25 miles. Im lifting heavy, instead of mixing up and hitting all the muscles I focus on upper one day, lower another, abs, etc, etc. These tough workouts h... Tue, 2 Oct 2012 11:10:17 EST I, mother. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5075820 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/8/3/l83318564.jpg"> <BR> Little girl emulate their mamas… Mine works out. <BR> <BR> That’s my daughter, Calissa Avery. She could count to 10 before most kids, now she can count to 20 with no problem because she is my work out buddy, she counts my reps. She lays out a blanket on the floor and folds it to look like my yoga mat. She asked for 1 lbs weights when I bought my 15 pounders… how could I say no? This morning she put on my weight training ... Wed, 26 Sep 2012 13:12:51 EST 4 or ? lbs to go... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5054548 I am constantly frustrated with myself and AMAZED! <BR> I can feel like crap because of a back slide, deep down I know I wont give up but part of me has. The doubt sets in and I feel like that's it, I'll never get to that final goal of just being able to live a healthy lifestyle. I feel lost like I don't know where to start again, how to pick up the pieces, what to eat, how to work out? <BR> <BR> I literally research and write out a plan. I HAVE to write out a daily checklist of what to ea... Tue, 11 Sep 2012 14:12:13 EST Tricks & Tips: http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5048453 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/7/5/l758967365.jpg"> <BR> No matter how tired you are, wash all of you veggies when you get back from grocery shopping. Wash and cut strawberries and place with washed grapes in the middle of your fridge so every time you or your family opens that door, BAM, sweet healthy juicy snack right in your face. Prevents mindless snacking when mindlessly venturing into the fridge. Trust me you'll need to start buying 2x as many grapes than usual! <BR> <... Fri, 7 Sep 2012 11:46:14 EST Mental reset http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5048428 I gave my scale to my husband and told him I only get to use it once in the next month and a half . &&I made my caloric goal yesterday! *Squeee* I am not big on fasting for detox, if it works for you, great! But I cant do it. I opt for low calories with daily increase for my detox because its my time for physical, mental, and emotional reset. By restricting my calories to 1/3 of what a normal person needs I have to put a lot of thought and planning into what each meal will consist of, and ... Fri, 7 Sep 2012 11:20:28 EST Lets try this again http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5046987 This summer has been a doozy! I can only assume the stress finally got to me because I have spent almost my entire summer sick, sick, sick. Everything from the flu, to colds, bacterial infections, injuries, hair loss! I have had it. I am at the point that when I get a headache I keep apologizing to my husband bc he's had to step up as Mr Mom for his summer vacation, poor guy. The only positive has to be seeing him in a new, well actually, old light. He was there when I needed him, not one com... Thu, 6 Sep 2012 11:38:51 EST bleh. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5018364 <BR> <BR> I haven't meant to ignore anyone. Ive been fighting a losing battle with a bacterial infection called Staph. This is my second infection in a 3 week period. 7 years ago I was hospitalized for the MRSA infection above my left eye, which left me with scar tissue and damaged muscles but I was healthy. It was incredibly terrifying. I don't like hospitals. I learned to be obsessively clean (huge reason I don't do gyms or share towels) and have avoided infections for 7 years now. App... Thu, 16 Aug 2012 16:33:11 EST Rising http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4972653 ~What defines us is how well we RISE after FALLING!~ <BR> <BR> After this weekends major food binge the scale is settled at 154... my 7 week program ends this Saturday. I assume I will be down to 150 by then which to me is in no way a failure... even though this will be 5 lbs from my goal, I am okay with it. Ive made such amazing progress and have worked continually for these last 7 weeks and it shows! I dont see myself giving up or stepping back now. Ive adapted a healthier lifestyle and I ... Mon, 16 Jul 2012 10:53:20 EST Week 4 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4956783 Weight loss is going a bit slower than anticipated but only by 1 lbs so hopefully with hard work and dedication I will still be able to reach my goal by the 21st. This is weight loss with weight lifting so I am doing great as far as I am concerned and I feel amazing! Lots of energy, liking my reflection...maybe a little too much :] Im going away for this weekend and Im wearing clothes Ive been yearning to wear on hot summer days in the sun, it feels crazy and wonderful! I was also named one o... Thu, 5 Jul 2012 16:09:34 EST Week 2, Week 3: http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4942987 My progress is right in line for success by July 20th! I had no weight loss this week but that's no surprise with my late night snacking. Week was rather stressful, Ive been doing much better in week 3. Instead of feeling overwhelmed by everything lifes throwing at me I am just trying to get back to the basics of doing what make me happiest then dealing with my daily checklist, at the end of the day I am feeling better. So here are the results... <BR> <BR> Starting weight, 159.5 (yep, I almo... Tue, 26 Jun 2012 10:36:32 EST Week 1, and 5 days. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4928871 I had a hard week. Something to do with my glucose levels but I will save that for another blog entry later this week. My goal is to lose just under 2 lbs a week for these 7 weeks. Bringing me to 145, what used to be my ultimate goal weight. I am in disbelief that I will be setting my new goals in the 130's maybe 120's! I was 125 lbs as a Freshman in High School, I have grown atleast 3 inches since then lol. But then again I haven't worn short in public since HS and I went shopping in sports ... Sat, 16 Jun 2012 11:25:28 EST 3 days deep http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4914882 I'm on day 3 of my meal plan and fitness routine. Green smoothies make me one happy feel good girl! I've already rid myself of the vacation bloat and am happier with the return of some of my muscle definition. It's amazing what a few days of little to no salt and some crazy hydration can do for your reflection. These first cardio workouts after that cold have been less than savory but Ive gotten through them. My weight training is less than spectacular but its getting done. I haven't had that... Wed, 6 Jun 2012 14:13:29 EST SienaLyn Rises 7.20.2012 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4911491 Ambition is nothing if not paired with motivation. <BR> <BR> I am a dreamer with more ambition than motivation. Without goal setting, list making, outlines, and overthought plans I honestly wouldn’t achieve much. My success relies on the confidence I have in a well laid plan. I haven’t utilized my last 6 months wisely. I made no plans and simply relied on my knowledge of what not to do and not so much of what needs to be done. The results has been maintaining my weight loss. Maintaining is ... Mon, 4 Jun 2012 12:08:18 EST California http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4909916 non fitness related ramblings... <BR> <BR> For those of you who may not know this. I am a born and raised Cali girl, swept off her feet by a Texan and whisked away to San Antonio. Ive been a Texas resident for the past 4+ years of my life. I was a newly engaged women in Texas, a newlywed in Texas, and experience my first pregnancy and birth of my daughter here in Texas. My heart is still Californian through and through. Ive only had the opportunity to visit my home state and town 3x since ou... Sun, 3 Jun 2012 11:48:45 EST Sick, happy, Cali, and other ramblings. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4874207 I got back to my workout routine today, well sorta. Im day 1 of recovering from the entire family being sick, I had the bonus of being an adult female and a killer 4 day migraine. So glad that is over! I am positive I am not 100% but in comparison I feel fantastic! Since I am keeping everything down Ive been back to hydrating, supplementing, juicing, and my workout. The workout lacked luster but I got through it. Id planned for a run this morning but DH has decided to take his time getting ho... Wed, 9 May 2012 15:34:44 EST Making 'it' happen... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4861620 In unpacking my craft stuff, and let me tell ya there is a lot of it, I ran across old journals and found 'my list'. You know the one filled with big ticket items, must haves, goals, aspirations, things you wish to 'one day' conquer. To my amazement, I need a longer list! Some of these things I had aspired to do since I was a young teen have just recently been crossed off but there they are done done done. Everything, except knit and play guitar. I let it sit on my night stand for a few days... Tue, 1 May 2012 16:43:58 EST fearlessness... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4851569 With the new house, new start, I had wanted to hit the ground running. Quite literally, I had planned to over use the running trails near my neighborhood. I have only gone a few times. As far as eating I am about 50/50, super clean eating and not really thinking about what I am putting in my mouth. I am determined to change this, I don't want to feel like I am wasting time. I have regained so much of my confidence and care free self love that I have been missing but I am yet to find my fear... Wed, 25 Apr 2012 11:54:36 EST February/March http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4812150 Lets see, these past 2 months have been busy, crazy, ridiculousness that has been my life! <BR> <BR> Fitness, I stopped running, I began to dread my urban jungle runs. I stuck with lifting weights and have been helping a trainer friend prep her body for a bathing suit competition. Its nice to know I am capable of being the one called on to help train a trainer! I have also been asked to help with an upcoming bootcamp. <BR> <BR> Family, Things are still rocky with the husband. We just had ... Fri, 30 Mar 2012 11:50:53 EST Where I am at, what is going on. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4728789 I am living in this stupid house being for sale. There are NO homes for rent in the area we decided would be perfect for us, there were more than 12 houses we were considering less than a week ago :| <BR> My daughter will be 2 on Friday. I am thrilled though this year we will NOT be having a party due to cost and home situation BUT the DH and I are planning on spoiling her all weekend. I am feeling guilty bc usually I make her something cool. At Xmas I made her a play kitchen for heavens sake... Wed, 8 Feb 2012 11:23:42 EST lol at myself! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4720208 That moment of dyslexia where you believe you've gained 5 lbs instead of losing 4. <BR> step on, look down: 165? <BR> step on, look down: 165? This is not possible!(take battery out, reset) <BR> Step on, look down: …. How the hell did this happen! Ive been working my tush off! That puts me 9 freaking pounds away from where I was hoping to be. * sob, tears, fk this, boohoohoo, dude wtf * fuuuuuuuuuuuuuu <BR> (take battery out, reset…again) <BR> step on, look down: ….. 156 *snort* *relief, em... Fri, 3 Feb 2012 10:34:38 EST week 2/2.5 mini update http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4701180 I didnt write a week 2 update and I am already half way through week 3. Life has been stupid busy. I am keeping up with my workouts, cardio, and lifting. My diet has been under control but not as clean as my get go. Showing the house has lead to being out of the house at meal time, so frustrating and I know this is NOT an excuse. I didnt take progress pics but I did wear a mini skirt the other day :] I havent weighed in and I dont really care, I feel great, really really great! I've got my '... Tue, 24 Jan 2012 13:14:51 EST 2012 Transformation: Week 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4676183 I could not be happier or more proud of the changes I have made in just one week, not to mention the progress I have achieved. I have found my discipline- in both my work outs and my diet. I am proving to myself and everyone around me how badly I want this. I am proving as a SAHM with no gym membership it is possible to lose weight, gain muscle, and get healthy. <BR> <BR> <BR> Prior to beginning the 12 week transformation challenge I had lost 55 lbs, it was a struggle of being on my game a... Thu, 12 Jan 2012 13:06:42 EST Day 4 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4665858 Just an update: Day 4 of eating clean, and I mean, really, really clean. And training hard with circuit training: lifting combined with cardio, jump rope and rounds on the bag. I just feel amazing! I have never had so much energy, or energy to spare. I haven't slipped up once. My only cheat is a flavored water, o calories but contains higher sugar than anything else I am eating. I enjoy taking supplements and becoming more educated on nutrition- getting it down to a science of what to eat at ... Sun, 8 Jan 2012 10:34:00 EST Healthy to Fit: 2012 Body Transformation Resolution! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4660320 Oh my I've gone crazy or maybe I am the most sane I have been in a long time, either way I am a big ball of nerves today. I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing that I feel so excited and unsure all at once. I can equate how I am feeling to the day I found out I was pregnant! Ecstatic, exactly what I wanted and had been working for, something I knew I could do and do it well... I was also overwhelmed, terrified at what I was getting into and how my life was going to change foreve... Thu, 5 Jan 2012 19:10:16 EST 2012 Transformation: Day 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4653815 I got on my scale this morning :0 yes I am smiling. I knew I had gained. Surprisingly I am not feeling overwhelmed by the 10 lbs difference, yep, you read that right. Honestly I have been bulking all winter and this last week I just had to have a cheat blow out... <BR> I only see my mom once a year for a week at most so you better believe I toss no sweets, no wine, no Starbucks, no fried food- or going out to eat OUT THE WINDOW. Don't worry I went outside and picked it back up this morn... Tue, 3 Jan 2012 10:49:12 EST Goodbye&&Hello http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4649901 DH swept me away to South Padre Island for New Years, our first overnight away from our daughter Calissa. It was hard, but needed, and worth it... did I mention we'd earned it! <BR> First off packing- it was so nice to be able to throw outfits in a bag and not get flustered at how bad it was going to look or the typical 'I WISH I could where something like this____.' <BR> It was nice to be active, not moody, walk the beach and not be out of breath. Confidence means more impulsive adventurou... Sun, 1 Jan 2012 22:51:56 EST How I made 2011 amazing: http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4643250 It's been a rough year. I've hit walls, fallen on my face, been crushed, life turned upside down but I never stopped getting up, I never stopped fighting! I've learned to stop trying to be so perfect. That it's okay to embrace my darkness as part of who I am. I view it as strength rather than a weakness, it is not shameful. To me it is powerful. I realized that where I fall is when I find my strength to fly. This is where my motto of 'Fall into the darkness, Fly into the Light' has come fro... Thu, 29 Dec 2011 12:14:36 EST MISS ME! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4640172 I bought MISS ME JEANS today! <BR> Not size 31… <BR> Not size 30… <BR> SIZE 29 ! ! ! <BR> <BR> goal reached. <BR> <BR> .it.feels.sooo.good. <BR> <BR> The Miss Me Jean moto is: <BR> miss yourself... <BR> find yourself... <BR> love yourself... <BR> <BR> 6 years ago I had my first pair of Miss Me Jeans, the pricey soul mate to my bottom! My only reward for weight loss was to get into these jeans- they are only made in size 31 and under! This was HUGE for me. Well I went I tried them on and ... Tue, 27 Dec 2011 13:25:01 EST My Xmas Gift http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4632752 This week is going to be a busy one, I am excited for this. I am excited enough to forget about spark and enjoy 'reality'....enough to forget how much I need, enjoy, and love spark and my spark family...Even though the rest of the year when my 'reality' isnt so filled with activities and joyful things to do. This is wrong wrong wrong. Spark offers togetherness my 'reality' doesnt always offer so why now should spark be abandoned... Id be pissed if a close friend I spent as much time with as I... Tue, 20 Dec 2011 11:57:26 EST 2 Down http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4624192 ...only 88 workouts to go. <BR> <BR> I am healthy. <BR> I am strong. <BR> I am determined. <BR> I have the time. <BR> I have the equipment. <BR> I have no excuse. <BR> <BR> I will compete P90X in 90 days. <BR> I will remember my vitamins. <BR> I will drink my water. <BR> I will prove how strong I am... mentally, emotionally, physically. <BR> <BR> I love myself, I am worth it. <BR> <BR> I am stronger than I was yesterday and I will make myself proud. <BR> I will reach my genetic potential... Tue, 13 Dec 2011 13:39:05 EST Revamped Regimen http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4622654 I am totally back on the P90X wagon! <BR> <BR> Background: I've had the P90X set since I was 6 weeks postpartum, Ive attempted it 3 times, each time abruptly giving up after injury. One of these time I made it to day 60 and still had to give it up due to REALLY bad back injury. I never followed the diet, just the workout. I switched to Bikram hot Yoga which helped my back BUT was way out of my league, it takes a mental strength I had not earned yet. I've been utilizing p90x for a quick 20-40... Mon, 12 Dec 2011 11:51:19 EST 'I HATE my body' http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4613621 ****I bet that title caught you attention!**** <BR> <BR> I am up 5 pounds. <BR> Partially I blame my lame foot. <BR> Partially my diet and not adjusting it to my fitness needs. <BR> <BR> It is what it is and I am doing my best to not beat myself up over it. Instead I am here to blog about how much I LOVE MY BODY! <BR> <BR> So often we say ' I hate my body', 'I hate my arms, 'I can't stand my stomach'. I am guilty of it more than once and I am sure you are to. I am also sure that we mean... Mon, 5 Dec 2011 16:45:45 EST Why do you? -or- Don't you? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4609341 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/3/7/l379132393.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Why do you work out? I work out because feeling weak physically leaves me feeling weak emotionally. I enjoy having energy and being capable of living an active lifestyle. I enjoy the freedom of wearing clothing that fits well and the carefree feeling when getting dressed. It isnt about believing I am not good enough, or that fat is ugly. For me, it's all about having something to prove to myself, living up to my ow... Fri, 2 Dec 2011 12:06:09 EST