EHLIFESSHORT's SparkPeople Blog EHLIFESSHORT's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community If your!!! If your thighs touch, you're one step closer to being a mermaid, so who's the real winner here? <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Sun, 13 Jul 2014 01:39:21 EST Cause meditation or karma!!! <img src=""> Fri, 11 Jul 2014 00:25:59 EST I Love!!! <img src=""> Tue, 8 Jul 2014 18:48:59 EST One Day!!! <img src=""> Mon, 7 Jul 2014 23:45:32 EST Hey!!! Scientists, you gave us Viagra, Cialis and Levitra. How about you stop playing with your d^cks and give us something for cancer? <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Sun, 6 Jul 2014 23:09:31 EST I woke!!! I woke up to drink some water in the middle of the night and I accidentally ate a whole pizza and a cheesecake. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Fri, 4 Jul 2014 23:41:20 EST Anyway!!! I'm glad I don' have a thigh gap. <BR> I almost dropped my phone into the toilet eh but I caught it with thunder and lightning. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Thu, 3 Jul 2014 19:07:02 EST I've never!!! I've never been to jail but I did get stuck in a pair of skinny jeans at Old Navy once. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Wed, 2 Jul 2014 21:50:09 EST Yes!!! <img src=""> Tue, 1 Jul 2014 22:23:36 EST Ya, well!!! <img src=""> Mon, 30 Jun 2014 21:55:37 EST Wouldn't it!!! Wouldn't it be cool if you heard a thunder bug a few seconds after you saw a lightning bug? <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Sun, 29 Jun 2014 00:42:39 EST Eh I've yet!!! I’ve yet to be intimidated by a fancy wine list thanks to my vast knowledge of fine wines and my eeny, meeny, miny, mo system... <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Thu, 26 Jun 2014 19:48:20 EST What!!! <img src=""> Sat, 21 Jun 2014 19:24:03 EST Yeah!!! <img src=""> Thu, 19 Jun 2014 23:50:50 EST Excuse me?!!! So you mean to tell me that a stress ball ISN'T for throwing at people who stress you out? <BR> <BR> Wed, 18 Jun 2014 23:50:20 EST Well!!! I don't see any reason why boxed wine shouldn’t come with a little straw stuck to the side...just sayin' <BR> <BR> Mon, 16 Jun 2014 23:34:04 EST HEHEHE!!! I always giggle when I see women wearing pink camouflage. <BR> Where are they hiding? <BR> Candyland? <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Sat, 14 Jun 2014 19:29:53 EST Well that explains it!!! <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Just saying Thu, 12 Jun 2014 23:03:24 EST Eh, okay!!! Okay, so I've never been skydiving but I've zoomed in on Google Earth really really fast! <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Tue, 10 Jun 2014 23:53:15 EST I stay!!! <img src=""> Tue, 27 May 2014 21:35:53 EST Instant feel good!!! Do like me. I put a bumper sticker that says "Honk If You Think I'm Sexy" on my car...then I wait at green lights until I feel better about myself... <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Sun, 25 May 2014 21:37:14 EST Ya that's!!! Great...another fine day ruined by responsibility... <BR> <BR> <em>211</em> Thu, 22 May 2014 21:36:27 EST Eh my face!!! <img src=""> Tue, 20 May 2014 20:07:11 EST Ummm!!! Ummm...why would a woman come with instructions? Have you ever seen a man read instructions??? <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Sun, 18 May 2014 23:04:52 EST One day!!! One day my fridge will take revenge on me by opening my bedroom door every half hour, staring at me for a few minutes and then leaving.... <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Fri, 16 May 2014 20:29:29 EST When a!!! When a women wears leather clothing, a man's heart beats quicker, his throat gets dry, he goes weak in the knees, and he begins to think irrationally, <BR> <BR> Ever wonder why? <BR> <BR> Duh, She smells like a new truck. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Thu, 15 May 2014 22:58:36 EST Relationship status!!! <img src=""> Wed, 14 May 2014 21:03:17 EST Found!!! <img src=""> Tue, 13 May 2014 20:37:34 EST Ya, well!!! Sometimes, <BR> late at night, <BR> I like to dig a hole in the backyard to keep my nosy neighbors guessing! <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Mon, 12 May 2014 21:51:59 EST Well, now!!! <img src=""> Sun, 11 May 2014 18:33:56 EST Life isn't a!!! Life isn't a fairy tale. It's a fill-in-the-blank-choose-your-own-adventur<BR>e-scratch & sniff-colouring-book with missing pages and random highlighted passages that make no sense to anyone but the author... <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Sat, 10 May 2014 23:56:26 EST People!!! People think I'm crazy because I talk to my dog. What am I supposed to do? Just ignore him when he asks me a question? <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Fri, 9 May 2014 18:30:43 EST Forget!!! <img src=""> Thu, 8 May 2014 21:40:54 EST When I see!!! When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think its cute. I just think it's crazy how many people bring knives on a date. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> ("I wish they'd leave us out of their sordid affairs!") Wed, 7 May 2014 22:16:12 EST Somebody just!!! Somebody just gave me a free air guitar..... No strings attached <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Mon, 5 May 2014 20:20:01 EST At the!!! At the end of each day, life should ask us, 'Do you want to save the changes?' <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <img src=""> Sun, 4 May 2014 19:24:37 EST No!!! No worries...your secret is safe with me. I wasn't listening anyway... <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <img src=""> Sat, 3 May 2014 21:34:54 EST Have you noticed!!! Have you noticed that men are sort of like puppies? They're excited to see us and they have no idea what we're mad about... <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Fri, 2 May 2014 23:03:16 EST Women's!!! <img src=""> Thu, 1 May 2014 21:14:11 EST Those!!! Those amazing eyes…Those kissable lips…That great smile…That sexy walk…That sultry talk...That’s enough about me. How are you? <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Wed, 30 Apr 2014 20:23:05 EST Ya!!! Calories? I think you mean delicious points! <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Mon, 28 Apr 2014 09:26:42 EST Relax!!! <img src=""> Sun, 27 Apr 2014 19:25:18 EST Eh if!!! If history repeats itself then I am SO getting a dinosaur... <BR> <BR> <img src="" Sat, 26 Apr 2014 11:50:19 EST 3 out of 4!!! <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Fri, 25 Apr 2014 19:18:46 EST Chick magnet!!! <img src=""> Thu, 24 Apr 2014 15:13:46 EST This!!! <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Wed, 23 Apr 2014 14:14:16 EST I got!!! I got tasered picking up my friend from the airport today. <BR> Apparently security doesn't like it when you shout, "Hi Jack!" <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Mon, 21 Apr 2014 00:37:13 EST OHHHHH!!! <img src=""> Sat, 19 Apr 2014 19:58:34 EST If a man!!! If a man can't make your panties wet, <BR> either through laughin' or lovin', <BR> there's no sense in keepin' him around! <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Fri, 18 Apr 2014 22:40:38 EST A Guy!!! A guy broke into my apartment last week. <BR> He didn't take the TV, just the remote. <BR> Now he drives by and changes the channels. <BR> Sick Beastard!!! <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Thu, 17 Apr 2014 21:22:43 EST