EBEAMS's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=EBEAMS EBEAMS's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Good day of travel yesterday http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6037627 Both of our flights were good .. very little turbulence. Hubby and I rented a locker in Minneapolis and stowed our carry ons for a walk-about of the airport to get our exercise in for the day. We figured out the airport is MASSIVE and that we could walk forever in there. <BR> <BR> Seeing family is always nice. Dinner was fun ... and awkward like it always seems to be when you don't see people for awhile. I have a difficult time talking about myself, so personal questions tend to make m... Wed, 25 Nov 2015 09:30:45 EST Big plans, small steps http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6037211 I'm past the planning stage and working on the action stage of things. I get that all things take time. And that it's easy to revert back to "old" habits because it's the most convenient and comfortable thing to do. So, it's small steps this time. Small Changes ... and attention to detail. I've got things printed for a new exercise and weight tracking station that will go up on my bedroom wall when I get back from vacation. I need to swing through Jo-Ann Fabrics and see if I can find so... Tue, 24 Nov 2015 12:56:21 EST What I'm thankful for ... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6036824 Each of you who read my blogs ... I'm thankful for you! <BR> <BR> Each of you who leave me a comment on my blogs ... I'm thankful for you! <BR> <BR> Each of you who send me a Spark gift ... I'm thankful for you! <BR> <BR> Each of you who leave a comment on my Spark Page ... I'm thankful for you. <BR> <BR> I have received so much support while being on SparkPeople. I love it. I love that people I've never met in person will take the time to reach out across the internet and give support,... Mon, 23 Nov 2015 18:09:41 EST Life is like the ocean http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6029172 ... and, often, I have to decide whether to sink or swim as the tide comes in and goes out. This past week, the head of our agency announced that he is most likely headed to a city 2 hours southeast of where we live to be their boss instead. <em>46</em> I've worked with this incredible man for 22 years. He was an officer I dispatched over the radio. He was the one who made the final decision to promote me last year ... He's family. This is a time when the tide is going out and I'm l... Mon, 9 Nov 2015 09:22:45 EST Adding as I go http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6028404 This was a good week. I'm still trying to find a new "center" and get stable but, all in all, I was pleased with some progress this week. I exercised 3 days this week. That's a start. I didn't obsess with food this week. That's progress. I enjoyed the outfits I wore this week and felt very confident in them - before any weight loss. I consider that a HUGE victory for me! I even went a tad outside my comfort zone and still felt good about myself. <BR> <BR> Yesterday was an emotionally... Sat, 7 Nov 2015 21:16:44 EST Working my new plan http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6025593 Ahhh ... I love having things on paper. That makes it a plan ... a real plan. I started out really ambitious and then figured out that I need to re-plan and start smaller. So ... 30 mins of exercise per day. A better plan for what I'm going to eat at work and when. Staying connected to Spark People. Finding joy in every day. <BR> <BR> I can do this! Mon, 2 Nov 2015 19:49:08 EST I'm finally home ... for few weeks! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6024228 Whew ... I'm still dragging from being away so much! I spent yesterday grocery shopping, cleaning and doing laundry. I found cobwebs in my house when I was mopping. Ewwww .... that's gross! <BR> <BR> I'm home for about the next 3 weeks and then it's off to KY for Thanksgiving. We've been trying to schedule Thanksgiving in KY with my in-laws for about the past 10 years. It is finally happening this year! I'm so, so, so excited! <em>334</em> <BR> <BR> Each of these trips gave me ... Sat, 31 Oct 2015 13:59:02 EST Enjoyed a little down time today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6015728 That last trip was REALLY good in the sense that we got a lot of great information on fixes we have been wanting. I love that the people we meet with are smart and so willing to share whatever they have with other agencies. We NEED more people like that in this world! <BR> <BR> That last trip was really a bear for totally other reasons. The Great Wolf Lodge is a kid oriented resort with a HUGE water park inside the building and the entire place geared to kids ... on all levels. It was li... Thu, 15 Oct 2015 22:37:21 EST Far from home http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6013985 The more I travel, the more I realize how much I like home. I'm guessing my retirement years will be spent puttering around my own ave rather than exploring! The place we are at for the conference is a giant famy resort with an indoor water park. Lots and lots of kiddos ... I'm not used to this. Guess it's time to stretch my boundaries and work on patience. Apparently I need it!!! Mon, 12 Oct 2015 20:33:05 EST Day 32 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6012438 Well, it wasn't a great day but it was ok. It's over and that's a good thing. No work tomorrow so I'm assuming I'll sleep like a baby tonight - I mean a content baby! ;) <BR> <BR> Tomorrow will be a marathon day of attempting to get all the things I normally get done in my 3 days off all done in one day. I need a list ... and a clone ... and way more energy than I usually have. <BR> <BR> Whew ... I'm tired and I haven't even started the day yet! <BR> <BR> Night, y'all Sat, 10 Oct 2015 00:02:37 EST Day 30 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6010818 Slept great until 3 am. Figured since I can't sleep that I could take care of the things chasing around in my brain. Created a flow chart to detail out the two different paths that we can take on a problem at work. Checked my emails, sent replies, posted on Facebook -- and decided to go ahead and blog early since I will be in a seminar until late this evening. <BR> <BR> One month today - 30 days - This is good news. I haven't been restrictive or obsessive over food or exercise but I've... Wed, 7 Oct 2015 06:54:14 EST Day 29 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6010630 <em>102</em> Unfortunately, this has been me all day long. I am just wore out. I didn't sleep well last night and that translated to a really deep sleep after I finally was able to go to sleep sometime after 3 am. I've felt drained and tired all day long. <BR> <BR> On the positive side, I'm getting to where I can figure out how my physical state of being affects my mental attitude. Today I dressed in bright pink and black and got several compliments ... but inside, I felt fat and d... Tue, 6 Oct 2015 21:23:25 EST Drum roll, please .... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6010013 It's .... a BOY! I was so incredibly touched to see our first biological grandchild. I did get a video, I did send it to his daddy ... and I'm convinced that little Allen James waved to his daddy on purpose! <BR> <BR> On another front, I had a NSV today!!! I put on my uniform shirt WITHOUT my "suck it up" spandex thing that I usually wear ... and no straining of the buttons at all! I haven't jumped back on the scale yet but that one thing made me feel like a million bucks! No straining ... Mon, 5 Oct 2015 21:05:18 EST Day 27 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6009297 Good thing this is a "for the rest of my life" thing. I almost forgot which day I'm on! It's been a busy but fairly calm day today. It is my only day off this weekend since yesterday was completely, totally and exhaustingly filled up with Cade's Camp. We started at 8 am and hubby and I finally left around 9:45 pm. I logged in over 10,000 steps for the day and was truly happy I had the forethought to shower in the morning before I left since coming home to get ready was RUSHED!!! Things ... Sun, 4 Oct 2015 20:24:29 EST Day 25 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6008245 Well, sleeping didn't go any better last night but I made it home safe and sound today. I popped out of bed and was on the road in 15 mins! Had a little reality check at the gas station where I filled up. I'm "usually" always alert to my surroundings and watching for people who are coming by me or my car but this morning a guy made it into my "bubble" before I knew what was going on. He asked me for a couple of buck to pay for his gas. He looked like a harmless college age kid and I almo... Fri, 2 Oct 2015 21:46:47 EST Day 24 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6007700 Ok, I'm done now. As much as I enjoyed learning and networking, I'm exhausted from lack of sleep and my body is NOT impressed with all the food I've been eating that's not normally part of my eating plan. Even when I "fell off the wagon", I still stuck to a lot of just plain food rather than fancy stuff. I have heart burn from lunch that wasn't helped by whatever was in the gravy at dinner. Of course I'm in a foreign land (i.e. not home) and have not heart burn stuff with me. Guess I'll ... Thu, 1 Oct 2015 22:55:06 EST Day 23 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6006951 Hmmmm .... this traveling stuff calls for more pre-planning and organization. I'm not sleeping, I'm sticking to oatmeal for breakfast, salad for lunch and then dinner ... well, that seems to vary with the place everyone wants to go. <em>24</em> One more day tomorrow and then it's time to head home. I'm ready already ... Wed, 30 Sep 2015 19:01:41 EST Day 21 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6005841 It was a good day even though it was a long drive. We got up this morning and walked a couple of miles before I headed out. All told, I have over 11,000 steps on my FitBit for the day. I'm happy. Eating stayed on the right track today, even though it wasn't what I expected. <BR> <BR> One day down, and 4 to go. I can do it! Mon, 28 Sep 2015 22:14:09 EST Day 20 - Relax Mode http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6005244 Today was a really nice, relaxing day. I spent some of the day getting all my stuff packed ... clothes bag, computer bag, snack bag .... and my purse cleaned out. I'm organized and ready but still worried I'll forget something I just "have to" have. Like I can't just go buy it ... I'm silly sometimes. <BR> <BR> Hubby and I are going to hit the Rec Center early in the morning and then I'm off. I need to do errands as I zig zag my way out of town. Have I told you about the fund raiser I'm... Mon, 28 Sep 2015 00:08:15 EST Day 19 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6004678 LOL ... I was j-u-s-t about done with my blog for today and ... yep, I erased it. Sigh ... Oh well ... I'm done. My Spark People fitness trackers says I've burned 1244 calories today and my FitBit says I've traveled 7.78 miles today. I'm tired. <BR> <BR> My eating was pretty good but I let myself get way too hungry between breakfast and lunch. I need to work on eat several small meals. <BR> <BR> Tomorrow's another day to excel ... :) Sat, 26 Sep 2015 22:37:46 EST Day 18 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6004159 Yesterday we learned that a dear friend had passed away on Monday from cancer. The funeral was last night. That was hard, very, very hard. When we got to the church, the lady who lost her husband asked me if I would be willing to sing and I just couldn't say no. It was really scary and the song I picked was one of the two that I could remember all the words to and sing without music. Turns out it was "Supper Time", which is an old gospel song that I love. My mom and I used to sing it to... Fri, 25 Sep 2015 23:21:41 EST Grumpy Day 16 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6002985 Ugh .. another night with very little sleep. It was so frustrating! I couldn't fall asleep and then I woke up at 1 am. I got up from 2-3 am and put in some work time since that's what was chasing around in my head. I went back to bed after 3 am and hubby's alarm went off at 5. Sigh ... no boot camp as I was barely cognitive to get ready and get to work. This morning I'd be in the middle of a sentence and lose my train of thought. Sigh ... It was very frustrating! <BR> <BR> Tonight I a... Wed, 23 Sep 2015 22:20:01 EST Day 15 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6002359 Today was one of those put your nose to the grind stone and just get through things. Ugh ... those days are necessary but so ... deflating. I prefer days that are more structured and organized. <BR> <BR> My eating was good today until we encountered a time hiccup this evening and ended up going out for dinner. I never even thought about making a healthy choice. Good thing is I don't consider this a failure but more of a learning experience. i can do better next time. <BR> <BR> Right ... Tue, 22 Sep 2015 22:17:26 EST Day 14 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6001565 The two week mark ... NICE! in 7 more days (theoretically) I should have my new habits established and a part of my "normal" routine. Now if my life would be "normal" and "routine" that would help out tremendously! <BR> <BR> Hubby and I usually have Mondays off together so we did a few little things around the house today. He worked on his homework for class tonight. We BOTH went to Boot Camp this morning. I figured since I woke up feeling fabulous and actually able to move, that would ... Mon, 21 Sep 2015 15:56:23 EST Yesterday and Today in Pictures http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6000996 Rachel and I ran/walked our way through the Harvest Classic yesterday. Surprised me that I could do it. We did 30 seconds run, 90 seconds walking. It worked out really well. I won't lie ... I was so sore from boot camp that I whined A LOT yesterday. After the race, I had to really, really, really evaluate if I need to sit down AT ALL because my thighs hurt so stinkin' bad! <BR> <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/bc0f2f76-4b9a-439f-bf28-af6ea829ac22.JPG"> <BR> (Sorry ... I... Sun, 20 Sep 2015 19:46:33 EST Day 12 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6000159 Blogging early cuz it's a crammed pack day. Already done grocery shopping for the next week and have (almost) everything put away. Heading out in 20 mins to get Rachel and her daughter. <BR> <BR> In my quick run through Walmart this morning, I picked up a cardigan and a knit dress that were both marked $9.94. When I got to the check out, the dress ran up at $3.00! SCORE! Great, comfy new outfit for $14 bucks! Love it! Have a bunch of traveling coming up so light, easy to pack, easy t... Sat, 19 Sep 2015 09:50:07 EST Day 11 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5999899 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/2167c4eb-6e02-4eb6-9d3e-ebf8f0a4cfd1.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Whew ... doggies ... What a day (so far)! Just logged my food that I've eaten so far today and my calories in are showing at 1119 while my exercise is showing at 1166 with a combination of boot camp this morning plus my FitBit feedback. I'm not hungry either. Not sure if that is good or bad. I've been monitoring my hunger levels through out the day and when I started to get hungry, I ate... Fri, 18 Sep 2015 20:18:33 EST Day 10 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5999334 Double digits!!! Yay!!! This will be a short blog tonight cuz I'm just plumb tuckered out! I crammed a lot into today and stretched my brain, not my legs. My eating was actually really on the low (very low) side of the calorie scale but I'm full and that makes the difference. <em>334</em> Lunch was chicken breast with quinoa and broccoli. Can't beat that! <BR> <BR> I've been pretty entertained the last two days as I've perked up after getting on the scale. I don't feel overwhelme... Thu, 17 Sep 2015 20:33:39 EST Day 9 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5998808 Perspective is everything, isn't it??? I've been avoiding the scale ... I ALWAYS am afraid to climb on that stupid thing. It is like it has it's own power to crush me ... or it seems like it. After being "off the wagon" for so long, I was totally avoiding it COMPLETELY. In the past 9 days, I've made small, consistent changes to my routine and my eating that, frankly, have been pretty easy. At our staff meeting today, they were passing around frosted animal cookies which are usually my fa... Wed, 16 Sep 2015 22:05:23 EST Day 8 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5998137 Recap from yesterday - I was really nervous but the class went well (I think). The majority of the participants were receptive and engaged ... There's always one in the crowd. <BR> <BR> Today was a busy, busy day. I have 12950 steps on my FitBit which translates to 5.22 miles and there's still about 3 hours left before bed! Woot Woot! I'm giving myself a gold star <em>8</em> for fitness today since I had a walking meeting in the parking garage today (ingenious) and then I actually l... Tue, 15 Sep 2015 20:34:26 EST Wading through nerves http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5997445 I said in one of my first blogs that so much has changed since I was active on Sparkpeople before that it's hard to even remember everything. I guess I'll share them as they come up. Like my second job ... I know, I know ... I finally have a job with a great schedule, no overtime per se and holidays off (first time since I started working in 1985) and ... I find a second job. It works for me because my second job is my passion ... sharing knowledge with others!!! NO .. I didn't say opinio... Mon, 14 Sep 2015 18:29:48 EST The problem with who we see in the mirror http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5996556 I believe we spend too much time believing the lies we tell ourselves when we look in the mirror. The reflection that we see is just that ... a reflection, a flat - none dimensional - reflection of our appearance - NOT of who we are. We believe that the reflection is how others see us as well and that's a lie. This morning I got on Sparkpeople early because I want it to be something I'm truly integrating back into my "normal" routine. In checking the comments on my blog from Day 5, I was ... Sun, 13 Sep 2015 10:47:02 EST Day 5 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5996282 Busy, busy, busy ... over 5 miles on my FitBit before 10 am (Yay!) and then it was housework, laundry, grocery shopping and craft. I watched a movie while I was folding several loads of laundry. OH ... and I finally vacuumed - I've told you I abhor vacuuming, right? I don't even know why but I do. I told Rachel this morning that I was very sure the vacuum police would be at my house any day now ... Thankfully we have no kids and no pets, so it's just us. I got it done ... and when my hus... Sat, 12 Sep 2015 21:53:02 EST Day 4 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5995577 Today was a really difficult day emotionally. I have successfully avoided hearing TAPS being played since 9-11 of last year when my mom's services were held at the VA cemetery. <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/5c774aa1-c2e8-47e7-a1d7-b50ff2c2f317.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I attended a 9/11 remembrance ceremony this morning at our local fire department. It was a lovely event but the very first note of TAPS caught me off guard and that was it. The rest of the day has been a... Fri, 11 Sep 2015 18:06:57 EST Day 3 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5995004 Let me start by saying "Thank YOU" to all my old Spark buddies that have been here, leaving encouragement, comfort and wisdom. It has been very good to "see" you all again! I missed you! <BR> <BR> As for today, well, it has been a good eating day. I was very mindful of internal chatter that was busy all day long. It was trying to convince me that I "needed" to stop somewhere and get myself a "treat". The main focus was a pumpkin scone at Starbucks but anything gooey and good would have... Thu, 10 Sep 2015 19:37:37 EST Day 2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5994321 Today was not a stellar day. I woke up feeling really full, then ate breakfast about 3 hours after getting to work, got re-immersed in my work and surfaced again with the feeling of starving. I know it's not real. I know there's no chance I'll starve today ... or even this week but my brain was having none of it. My son texted me while I was in "food hunting" mode and we went out to lunch. Good thing is I want to spend time with my son ... bad thing is I ordered my usual order of Mandari... Wed, 9 Sep 2015 19:31:54 EST Day 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5993613 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/84d39551-a7a2-46c9-941b-22cc9c2cb3b8.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Breakfast: Fresh fruit <BR> Lunch: 1/2 order of grilled chicken salad with ranch dressing on the side <BR> Snack: BeVita crackers <BR> Dinner: Fish, veggies and salad <BR> <BR> Exercise: Walked with my Spark buddy, Rachel, at a local mall. <BR> <BR> Hungry level: Good this morning but this afternoon was very difficult. I crave sugar ... candy, cake, frosting ... cookies. I drank wa... Tue, 8 Sep 2015 19:02:53 EST Time for change http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5993067 It's hard to believe that yesterday was the 1st anniversary of my mom passing away ... and the 14 month anniversary of our son's passing. We've survived most of the 1st --- holidays, birthdays, letters in the mail, people asking how they are and the anniversary dates. Sometimes, it's seemed like time was speeding by, especially as significant dates were approaching but, most of the time, it felt like that period of time drug on ... like trying to swim in a pool filled with jello. It was me... Mon, 7 Sep 2015 23:15:51 EST Run Day 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5950485 I started walking with my Spark buddy again for 2 - 3 mornings a week several weeks ago. As we've walked and talked, I've found that I feel better. Earlier this week I told my hubby I was ready to start running again. Funny thing was I told my hubby one day and my Spark buddy told me she had started running again the next day. Life is funny! <BR> <BR> It was 4 am when the alarm clock went off and frankly I wanted to do something bad to the person who had set it. I was thinking more like... Wed, 24 Jun 2015 21:23:00 EST Surprise! I'm here! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5928039 Yesterday turned into one of those surreal days where you feel like you were run over by your life and you are not q-u-i-t-e sure what happened. <BR> <BR> When I ate my breakfast yesterday morning, I had a sharp pain in my neck that made it uncomfortable to chew but it wasn't a "stop-the-day" type thing. I did notice a little swelling but it was the size of a small pebble and I wasn't that concerned. Until I ate again and the pain was still there and the swelling was getting more noticea... Thu, 14 May 2015 11:12:22 EST Ugh ... what a week! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5925974 I'm not complaining ... or maybe I am but wow, what an incredibly hectic week. I started out strong but by Friday, I was dragging. This week isn't looking any better ... in fact, it looks more hectic and frantic. <BR> <BR> In order to attempt to combat my feeling of being overwhelmed and overcommitted, I'm going to work out first thing in the morning. And I'm not committing to ANYTHING next Saturday and Sunday. NOTHING except what I WANT to do to relax. <BR> <BR> First though, I've ... Sun, 10 May 2015 20:43:07 EST Need some real rest http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5923326 I am not sleeping well at all. I keep having nightmares and my sleep hasn't been solid, deep or restful for several nights in a row now. Tomorrow is a 16 hour day if I don't get up and go run in the morning ... an 18 hour day if I do. As of this minute, I'm too tired to even think about getting up and going to do anything before I absolutely have to. Yet, I know that I want to stick to my plan ... it's confusing. Maybe I should accept that the plan for this week was flawed from inceptio... Tue, 5 May 2015 22:01:07 EST Enjoying a down day ... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5921982 Yesterday my hubby and I got our storage unit completely emptied, swept and signed off. We're no longer paying rent on a place to keep things we don't have room for! We do have a pile of boxes in our garage that need to be gone through and lots of organization needs to happen but, as of yesterday, we now have our belongings all in one place. <BR> <BR> This is important to me because my side of the family is overly blessed with the gift of keeping everything. And yes, I really mean everyth... Sun, 3 May 2015 19:49:10 EST Run day #3 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5920970 Ahhh .... I did it! I completed all three run days this week as planned! <em>224</em> I found some more motivation to put on my wall so I see it first thing in the morning ... <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/9/3/l934167608.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I think this is one of the wisest things I can remember. Weight gain happens so insidiously quickly and, for the most part, unnoticed (i.e. ignored in my case). Somehow, my brain thinks two weeks of eating (fairly) clean ... Fri, 1 May 2015 19:32:09 EST Fueled by competition http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5920413 So ... I have this little problem. I'm a perfectionist who always wants to be the winner at everything. I'm not a braggart, I just want to be FIRST place ... Always have, probably always will. <BR> <BR> I joined this 14 day challenge through the work fitness program and it's on! Last night I was NOT in the top 5 people on the team and that just can't happen! I don't know that I can match or surpass the number of steps some of those ladies posted (over 28,000 for on day) but I can at leas... Thu, 30 Apr 2015 20:47:03 EST I'm Grumpy! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5919366 I am struggling with some things that are not under my direct ability to control and it's making me really grumpy. My natural communication style is calm, collected and compromising but I don't want to be any of those things right now. <em>234</em> <BR> <BR> I'm going to bed so I can sleep it off. Tomorrow morning I'm going to roll out of bed with a smile and go for a run ... <BR> <BR> Good night! Tue, 28 Apr 2015 22:46:41 EST Measurable progress http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5918373 So, I didn't have the courage to get on the scale when I started over again this time. I'm content to go with what I had in my tracker from the last time I adjusted my weight ... and that means the scale reflected a 2 pound loss this morning! It's a little weird that it didn't excite me when I weighed - maybe cuz it was 4:15 in the morning and we were heading out to go on a little run. <em>331</em> That's ok cuz I'm super excited now! <BR> <BR> I love that the first weigh in is "rein... Mon, 27 Apr 2015 08:22:56 EST God's word is always on time http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5918021 The message this morning was on finding our joy in God rather than in our circumstances. I so needed to hear that. I needed to be reminded that there is still a place I can carry my brokenness to and be filled up. I know that trials are given to make us stronger and to increase our character ... I believe that God is more than able to see me through any trial I face. Sometimes I just need to be reminded. <BR> <BR> I'm declaring this day a victory already. It's almost 2 pm and I've track... Sun, 26 Apr 2015 15:40:58 EST Struggling today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5917605 It's one step forward and two steps back. My exercise has been good today but I'm really, really struggling with eating. Mother's Day is quickly approaching and that makes me very sad. Last year we took my mom on a train ride with a friend of her's to celebrate what we knew was her last year with us. Sigh ... this year is going to be so very hard to get through. <BR> <BR> I want to go to my cupboard and gobble down EVERYTHING in there! I have some small candy bars that we got in a baske... Sat, 25 Apr 2015 19:18:57 EST What a day! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5917201 Whew ... I'm plumb wore out! Started early and accomplished 98% of what was on my to-do list today! Woohoo ... laundry - done; grocery shopping - done; cooking for the week - 98% done (I still need to cook some meat and make buffalo cauliflower bites for my darlin); bedding all washed up, housework done to include cleaning both bathrooms AND getting all of the mopping and vacuuming (which I abhor) done .... That thrills me! I love a clean house. It looks good, it smells good ... it makes... Fri, 24 Apr 2015 21:55:34 EST