DRAGONCHILDE's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=DRAGONCHILDE DRAGONCHILDE's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Why is this so hard? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6355596 From SP Motivator to 204 pile of miserable. <BR> <BR> I've gained back all but about 6 pounds of what I'd lost. <BR> <BR> And I've tried several times to get back on; why is it so hard to come back? I know I can do this. I've done it! VERY successfully; I'd gotten down to 164. The right way. Slowly, with healthy lifestyle changes. <BR> <BR> Why can't I get it going again? I know what to do. Start tracking. I even have a phone that can run the app now, and the barcode scanner works great... Sun, 30 Apr 2017 12:35:15 EST Miss me? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6274976 Naturally, my time away has reversed most of my progress, putting me back almost exactly where I started. Pregnant-looking, miserable, and fat, <BR> But I'm not discouraged. I already know what I need to do. And I'm HERE. <BR> <BR> And I have a new fitbit that's going to help get me motivated.They sync with SP, I think, and i just have to figure out how! Thu, 1 Dec 2016 19:17:36 EST He's home! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5860178 Sunday, my prayers were answered. My husband came home! We're taking things a little at a time, and trying to be patient and gentle with each other. We have a lot of things to recover from, and it's going to take a lot of time, but he's HERE, and he's willing to try. I'm a little giddy, to be honest. <BR> <BR> I'm still working hard on my recovery, and will not let this change interfere with that. <BR> <BR> Thank you for all of your prayers, as well. I'm going to continue to keep you g... Thu, 22 Jan 2015 10:27:50 EST One day at a time http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5850503 If you recognize that phrase, then perhaps you are no stranger to 12 step programs. <BR> <BR> Neither am I. I have been a member of Al Anon for years; it was the only thing that helped me survive my husband's alcoholism. <BR> <BR> Now though, I walk on the other side, the side of the addict. Already, though my sobriety is only a week old, I feel better. I feel empowered, like I can do this. I've set aside my troubled marriage, and today I focus on taking care of myself, and working throug... Fri, 9 Jan 2015 17:00:25 EST Update http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5845150 I've had a few people ask me how I'm doing. <BR> <BR> Honestly? Still not well. I've lost 18 lbs this month. Given that I'm not about 8 pounds from my goal weight... this isn't good. <BR> <BR> I've come to some realizations about myself that I don't like; I'm working some 12 step programs for some addictions that I have had to face that have helped destroy my life. I'm reaching out for help. <BR> <BR> I'm looking for a doctor next week to help with medical issues, including crippling d... Sat, 3 Jan 2015 21:39:32 EST Life = gone to hell http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5832490 So my life just imploded. My husband left me. <BR> <BR> The reasons are... multitude. Suffice it to say I am not blameless; however, he is living in a situation that is not conducive to healthy... anything at the moment. It's only been a week, and my world is falling apart. <BR> <BR> I'm not eating. I'm barely sleeping. I can barely function at all. <BR> <BR> I've lost 8 lbs in the last week. <BR> <BR> Not the good kind of weight loss, either. <BR> <BR> I don't know what to do with ... Sat, 13 Dec 2014 17:18:14 EST Obamacare, I am IN YOU! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5651017 Well, after much aggravation, tons of cussing at modern technology, I'm now officially enrolled in an insurance plan. For the first time in 10 years, I can afford to go to a doctor. Got a pretty decent deductible, and with the tax credit, I'm only paying a bit under $40 a month. We need dental too, but it's going to be hard to afford a decent dental plan. <BR> <BR> My experience? I tried when it first opened, and experienced what everyone else did. Crap. So I waited for them to work out t... Tue, 18 Mar 2014 19:16:41 EST Circuit training... bloopers and pain http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5623993 So our gym has added a premium class with a football training coach. Pretty standard circuit training, a little bit of crossfit-inspired (including those big ropes.) <BR> <BR> I have no intention of spending extra money on it (it's $10 a class, or $70 a month. ON TOP of my regular fees!) but they offer a free trial, so why not? <BR> <BR> Overall, it wasn't anything to write home about. I DID enjoy it, but I'm not really at the fitness level where it was feasible for me, yet. I've lost a l... Fri, 14 Feb 2014 13:00:13 EST Well, that was a dumb move http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5623404 So tonight I had one of my favorite dinners. Velveeta shells and cheese! I love this stuff. It's definitely a trigger food for me, but hey, I had a limited amount, and that's not the problem. I mixed it with Rotel and tuna. Pretty tasty and filling! <BR> <BR> Problem is, my lactose intolerance is warning me that tonight is gonna be rough. My guts are grumbling and announcing their presence. <BR> <BR> Oops. <BR> <BR> Ah well, it tasted good. ;) Thu, 13 Feb 2014 20:00:21 EST Made the switch http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5621323 So after I hit the gym this morning (and I'm proud of my trip) I got the red "burning too many calories" message in my fitness tracker. So I decided now would be a good time to make the switch to the variable calorie tracker, the new one that SP introduced that changes your calorie goal based on how much you workout. <BR> <BR> I'm an intermittent exerciser right now, and I have the same weight loss goals regardless of how much I burn, so this makes sense for me. If I find my progress slows,... Tue, 11 Feb 2014 12:08:21 EST Getting serious about strength http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5620672 Going to the gym with my friend has me wanting to get serious about strength again. I've gone too long without a regular program, and I always love the way I feel after a good workout. <BR> <BR> I'm no slouch, although it's been a while since I really spent time with the weights, so I have to re-acquaint myself with the equipment. <BR> <BR> I didn't go today thanks to some drama, but I'm determined to go tomorrow. Mon, 10 Feb 2014 18:05:41 EST Nachos and Nostalgia http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5619647 Today has been a great day. I got a lot of GOOD sleep last night; went to bed about 10:30, with my oldest daughter. Normally I go to bed at 1 or later! We slept well, and my husband apparently slept on the couch, LOL. No sympathy, means I rested well. <BR> <BR> This afternoon, I took the girls skating! We went to an old rink that I grew up at, just a mile or two from my house. It was so much fun, the place hasn't changed a BIT. It changed ownership recently, and the new owners are committed... Sun, 9 Feb 2014 17:57:30 EST Gymtastic http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5616884 So a friend of mine joined my gym, and was trying to get me to go, so I figured... why not? I'm paying for the stupid membership. <BR> <BR> We went, and I feel so good right now. The only drawback is she's one of those that likes to go for hours at a time; I really get sick of it after an hour. I stuck with it, though, since it's been a while. I plan to do a cardio day tomorrow. <BR> <BR> I have to remind myself not to be one of those people... you know, the gym knowitall? I know she need... Thu, 6 Feb 2014 12:06:31 EST Being broke does have its advantages http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5591419 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/7/l1786409616.jpg"> <BR> When you have no money, there's no money for sodas, junk food, and fast food. <BR> <BR> We're in a really tight spot right now... and by tight spot, I mean just applied for food stamps and hope it comes in soon, because we have no money for ANY healthy food broke. <BR> <BR> I've got less than $200 to my name, and it's about to be less since I just sent the husband to the store for hot dogs, frozen pizzas, and spaghe... Sun, 12 Jan 2014 17:00:05 EST All's well that ends well. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5580805 Went for my mammogram yesterday. All's clear! Everything looks normal, although the radiologist did recommend that I get regular yearly mammograms given my family history. Fri, 3 Jan 2014 13:39:08 EST Binge and gain http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5575684 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/3/l233320409.jpg"> <BR> <BR> So yesterday was a very binge-y day. It was unpleasant all around; my emotional state was in shreds, and I ate as a result. And not a veggie in sight the whole day. Seriously, the only vegetable I ate was a serving of corn with our fried chicken dinner. <BR> <BR> I'm up over 10 lbs now. I've gone from 184 to 195. And I weighed in at the doctor the other day at 200. I'm fairly sure that's just from sodium overdose,... Mon, 30 Dec 2013 13:28:10 EST Family history? Not me! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5572197 Well, actually. <BR> <BR> So, my mother is a third-generation breast cancer survivor. Last year, she was diagnosed with stage 1 aggressive breast cancer. <BR> <BR> So naturally, I've been doing regular self-exams. We almost certainly have the gene, although we can't afford the expensive genetic testing to find out. <BR> <BR> About three months ago, I found a lump. <BR> <BR> I told my husband. He wanted me to get it checked out immediately. Unfortunately, I don't have insurance, so get... Thu, 26 Dec 2013 11:12:09 EST Shopping for clothes? I don't mind. Too much. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5566476 SparkCoach challenged me today to blog about this, and it struck a cord, so why not. <BR> <BR> When I first started here at Sparkpeople, I was in a bad place; I was trying to find myself again. <BR> <BR> I got into exercise, and started kicking butt and taking names. I joined a gym. I tracked. <BR> <BR> And I lost 20 lbs. I felt *good*. I liked going shopping, because those were only 20 lbs, but they meant going from a 16 to 12. <BR> <BR> Now? I'm still not hating clothes shopping, bu... Tue, 17 Dec 2013 11:35:43 EST New toy! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5565916 I just got a smartphone. It's not a super great one, but it's got a *recent* version of android (newer than my Acer tablet) and I like it. <BR> <BR> It retails at $100, I got it for $70 at Target. I'd been planning to get one anyway, but that was a deal too good to miss. I've been using it on wifi for a while now, and it seems to be working nicely. <BR> <BR> No matter what you can say about Apple versus Google, I just signed in with my google account, and bam, all my contacts, email, book... Mon, 16 Dec 2013 18:36:33 EST I'm back! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5561539 I know some of you guys have been worried about me; I've gotten periodic messages, comments, and SparkGoodies from many of you. Thank you for that; it means more than you know! <BR> <BR> As some of you already know, November is a REALLY tough time for me. I am generally working constantly on my job for NaNoWriMo, which takes up obscene amounts of time. <BR> <BR> This year, while I've done better, I'm still disappointed by how much my lifestyle has crashed and burned. I'd gone so long main... Tue, 10 Dec 2013 19:01:17 EST So what happened http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5492999 I've been gathering my thoughts, trying to figure out how to say this. Trying to decide if I should at all. <BR> <BR> But I've always been open in my life, and at church last week, my preacher said something that resonated with me. <BR> <BR> "Sin grows in darkness." <BR> <BR> Hiding what's going on doesn't make the problem easier. So I've been reaching out to friends, family, and loved ones, just getting the support I need. My husband would probably prefer that I was less open with it, ... Sun, 22 Sep 2013 17:42:38 EST Sometimes. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5487801 Sometimes, in spite of all your best efforts to love and support someone, it's not enough. <BR> <BR> Sometimes, you have to do what's right, not what feels good. <BR> <BR> Sometimes, you have to let go, and let them fall. Even if it makes them bleed. <BR> <BR> Because sometimes, love just isn't enough. Mon, 16 Sep 2013 23:35:40 EST Why hello my nemesis! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5469018 I'm back to 185 as of today. This weight has tormented and plagued me for months. Tantalizingly, I'll hit it, triumphantly update my SP weight, and then up it creeps again for a few weeks. <BR> <BR> I haven't nudged higher than 187 in a long time, but 185 is this scary threshhold for me. However, the changes I've made recently, I think I can get to 184. <BR> <BR> 184. The lowest weight I've been in years. I want to be that weight. <BR> <BR> My next big goal is 179. That's how much I wei... Wed, 28 Aug 2013 14:26:40 EST What is strength? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5452553 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/3/8/l385706194.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I've been asking myself this question a lot lately. I've had a lot of people tell me I'm a strong woman, but I must admit, I don't really understand what that means. <BR> <BR> Is strength taking care of your children first no matter what? <BR> Is strength standing up for yourself in the face of adversity? <BR> Is strength not making compromises for your health or sanity? <BR> <BR> Maybe I'm strong, but the ide... Mon, 12 Aug 2013 08:36:15 EST And it all falls down. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5445759 Just when things were starting to improve, I was starting to feel a bit more confident about my relationship and our prospects. <BR> <BR> My husband was kicked out of his addiction recovery program. <BR> <BR> Which means he has two options now. Based on the ultimatum I gave him last week: <BR> <BR> 1) Go into a long-term residential recovery program (anywhere from 6-12 months) <BR> 2) Get out of my house. <BR> <BR> This is what I'm looking at. Either way, I am going to have to deal wi... Mon, 5 Aug 2013 21:53:04 EST Back to tracking again. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5443374 I am trying to cut back on cheese (I'm a lactose intolerant cheese addict) and I'm getting back to tracking. I tracked solidly for a year, lost 25 lbs, and have fallen off the wagon. My portions have crept up. While I haven't been gaining, I've been maintaining so long I can't even call it a plateau anymore. So I have to get back to counting calories and tracking. I still need to replace my broken scale. <BR> <BR> Since I started DDPY, though, the scale has been inching down. An ounce here,... Sat, 3 Aug 2013 15:06:09 EST You can do it, Dragonchilde! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5442840 Why are you talking to yourself in the third person, Dragonchilde? <BR> <BR> Well, you often talk to the other people here a lot. You don't talk to yourself much. Your Sparkcoach challenge for today is to give yourself a pep talk. And well, Sparkguy is right! You don't cheer yourself on often enough. You spend a lot of time on this website, encouraging others, teaching others, but you don't spend that time on you. <BR> <BR> So today, you're going to do just that. And why should you keep ... Fri, 2 Aug 2013 23:51:27 EST Trying out SparkCoach app. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5440484 As a part of buying the Spark Solution, I got some free Spark Coach time. Turns out it has an app! I really like it. Smooth, well designed. Easy to surf and get spark points for reading articles. I'm even blogging from my iPod! Well done, SP! Thu, 1 Aug 2013 00:41:00 EST Sparking at 30,000 feet! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5426494 Today I embark upon the third flight of my life, from Atlanta , GA to Portland, OR. I'm really excited about this trip, although my seat mates both on the plane and on the shuttle to the airport are major talkers... Nonstop. Not to me, but to each other. The first was just obnoxious, a gossipy lady who refused to wear her seat belt. She spent the entire ride talking about other people and how they should live their lives. The current two on the plane aren't too bad, just chattery and gesture... Fri, 19 Jul 2013 13:25:28 EST DDP Yoga: Day 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5425617 Well, just finished with day 1's Diamond Dozen workout! My husband agreed to do it with me! I really wanted him to do the breathing (that's a problem he's always had, he takes shallow, quick breaths all the time). <BR> <BR> He wasn't able to complete everything, but I encouraged him to modify, take his time, and do what he could. He did the first five poses, and had to take a break. I did the rest, and he did safety zone (child's pose) with me to relax. I think his problem is he tends to h... Thu, 18 Jul 2013 17:53:43 EST My new fridge! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5419888 Thought you guys might like to see the new fridge. I've since replaced shelves and plugged it in. <BR> <BR> Here's the old one: (Yes, it's dirty. It builds up, and gets hard to clean after a while. ;) ) Notice the dry rot and holes on the right side door. <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/6/l1624715160.jpg"> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/4/l1408422690.jpg"> <BR> <BR> And here's our new one (not plugged in yet) <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos... Sat, 13 Jul 2013 14:14:10 EST Budget? What budget? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5419446 So. This week, especially yesterday, has proven to be utter crap. I've had a few good moments (ordering DDP a couple of days ago) but today proved to be the final, crappy capstone to an otherwise adequate week. <BR> <BR> My refrigerator died this morning. <BR> <BR> Now, we are poor people, as my regular readers may know. I don't have the money to be buying appliances. How poor? Well, the fridge that broke? I was *7* when it was purchased by my mom, brand new. <BR> <BR> It had stuff grow... Sat, 13 Jul 2013 00:57:50 EST Happy Birthday To Me http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5416795 So my birthday's coming up at the end of the month; I'll be 34. (The 29th, if you care) There's not a lot I want right now; there's lots of intangible stuff, but things? I don't really think I know of anything I wanted. <BR> <BR> A friend of mine on G+ ordered DDP Yoga to do with her mom. <BR> <BR> I've been wanting to do the program for quite some time, but haven't been able to justify the expense. <BR> <BR> You know? I deserve something nice for myself, right? My gym membership's a bu... Wed, 10 Jul 2013 13:41:56 EST My dog killed the neighbor's cat http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5405830 I feel so awful. In some ways, the responsibility is equally both of ours; they have several cats that they don't really take care of; but still. <BR> <BR> We don't really know what happened; we got a panicked call from the neighbor that our dog might have their cat, so we all ran outside, but by the time we got to the front yard, it was too late. It didn't look bad, so most likely Ozzy just broke her neck. He's got some bird-dog in him, so there was little injury that we could see. <BR> ... Sat, 29 Jun 2013 21:57:40 EST Progress... it's working http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5401125 So, my rededication to exercise has involved no calorie counting, rather, just sensible choices and portions. <BR> <BR> And apparently I've *finally* learned enough about what goes in my body that this is enough for me to lose weight. <BR> <BR> After being stuck at 187.4 for so long that I was thinking that it was going to be my permanent weight, I've weighed in this morning at 185! Two days ago, I got 185.4, and then yesterday, 187, but this time, I'm counting it. ;) The 187 was from so... Tue, 25 Jun 2013 09:18:13 EST A little kindness goes a long way http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5396770 Today has been a phenomenally bad day. Emotionally, physically, even just spiritually. <BR> <BR> Things got so bad that my husband left to take the girls to a friend's house to play to give me time to cool down. <BR> <BR> After stewing and fretting and cussing by myself for a while, I got up, and went out and mowed the lawn. And after I mowed my lawn, I mowed my neighbor's lawn. <BR> <BR> That 90 minute task (a massive calorie burn to boot!) I felt a lot better, and not just because of ... Thu, 20 Jun 2013 22:13:48 EST No more addictions. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5396502 I'm so sick of addictions ruling my life. I hate alcohol. I hate cigarettes. And I don't mean like some people do, where they just don't do it, I mean that the sight of drinking, alcohol ads, people smoking where I can see them (or god forbid, smell it) triggers a visceral, deep-seated hatred. <BR> <BR> I'm tired of justifications and rationalizations. I'm tired of people who live with alcoholics saying "it's okay for me, he's not that bad." I'm tired of people who make excuses (and I incl... Thu, 20 Jun 2013 16:26:09 EST Summers are so busy around here! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5392100 Part of it's my own fault, really; I live in the Bible belt... and I honestly don't do well when there are kids around me 24/7. ;) I yell a lot. <BR> <BR> So, to mitigate that, I take advantage of what is likely a unique southern phenomenon: <BR> <BR> Vacation Bible School. <BR> <BR> Now, before you protest, yes, I know that they have VBS elsewhere. But what makes it unique here is the sheer pervasiveness of the programs. Nearly every church has one, and the best part is that there are ... Mon, 17 Jun 2013 13:52:51 EST Social services aren't about lazy people on welfare http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5387029 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/3/l537908043.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Social services are for people like me; who have jobs, but don't quite make enough to make ends meet at the end of the month, even with careful budgeting. <BR> <BR> This month, I got a rude awakening about how thin that lifeline is, and now my daughter's paying the price. <BR> <BR> You see, there is no safety net. No warning. Nothing. I understand why sometimes people prefer to make less money, because the gap ... Wed, 12 Jun 2013 14:01:03 EST Pictures: Where I am today http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5365602 Okay, time to bite the bullet, and take and show my before pictures. I'm a little mushier than I was last year, although I've only gained an inch in a couple of places. <BR> <BR> Why do I take pictures like this? <BR> <BR> Because I've found that we simply don't have a realistic view of our own bodies and their progress. We see them every day, and the huge changes we make over months are masked by our adjusting perception of the incremental changes we see each day. <BR> <BR> Way back, I... Thu, 23 May 2013 11:08:30 EST Starting over with my baby steps http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5365109 Okay, so starting over isn't the right phrase, but it makes a good blog title. I know that I'm most assuredly not starting where I began. I'm making smarter choices and being healthier overall. <BR> <BR> But I have to sit down and pour out my heart to you. I'm not where I should be. I've fallen down and I'm having a hard time getting up. <BR> <BR> I haven't tracked in months, and I don't *want* to. <BR> <BR> I haven't exercised in months, but I desperately want to. Lord knows my checkbo... Wed, 22 May 2013 22:52:51 EST We often change, more than we can imagine! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5353465 Humankind isn't static. Thank GOD! <BR> <BR> We change, often, throughout our lives. We can drive this change in a positive direction, let us be dragged along by negativity and stress, or pretend it's not happening and just exist. <BR> <BR> We always change. <BR> <BR> Here at Sparkpeople, I'm learning, slowly but surely, how to direct those changes in way that is resulting in a healthier me. A better example for my children. <BR> <BR> I wish it was faster. It feels like such an excr... Sat, 11 May 2013 21:30:49 EST Running for Water http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5339450 So, Saturday I ran in the Oasis 5k to help build a well for clean drinking water in Africa. It was a relatively small race (well, I don't have a lot to compare it to, just the local Susan G komen race which is enormous) but a lot of fun. <BR> <BR> I learned several things Saturday. <BR> <BR> 1) I can run a lot more than I think I can!) I ran a LOT. i'd say almost half the race, I actually ran! not consecutively of course, but my goal time was 50 minutes, and I did it 44:21. <BR> <BR> 2) ... Mon, 29 Apr 2013 12:25:16 EST Mood still sagging, trying to stay positive http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5335205 So sleep didn't help my mood any. I woke up in the same funk. <BR> <BR> The one good thing is that I really, really had the urge both last night and this morning to head over to Waffle House for some pity-party comfort food. I resisted it, and went to bed. <BR> <BR> This morning I'm finding that instead of being just sad, I'm annoyed and have little patience. I slept on the couch because he was snoring badly last night, and I think he was sneaking alcohol (which ALWAYS dials the snoring up... Thu, 25 Apr 2013 11:07:51 EST An odd sadnesss. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5334482 I don't know what's into me today. I think the depression is trying to sneak back, since I haven't been exercising. <BR> <BR> I did do my standing desk most of the day today; after 1 I had to move to the living room, though. <BR> <BR> Today I'm feeling defeated. My eating plan has derailed entirely, and I'm going over my ranges most days. I even gained some of my weight back (just a couple of pounds, but definitely not the way I want the numbers to be going.) <BR> <BR> I'm just not feel... Wed, 24 Apr 2013 18:50:28 EST Standing Desk: Day 1! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5331983 So if you read my blog yesterday, you know I got the stuff to make my standing desk. Nw, my setup isn't complete; I'm lacking a mat for the floor, and I need a chair or stool to sit on when I need a break. But, I wanted to start my experiment! <BR> <BR> So far today, I'm feeling good. I can tell my posture sucks; although my desk is set up on proper ergonomic principles, I find myself drawing my shoulders up to my ears and floating my hands over my keyboard. This is a matter of habit, I thi... Mon, 22 Apr 2013 16:28:19 EST Standing up for myself! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5329873 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/4/0/l400479057.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Recent studies have been quite clear: sitting on your ass can kill you. Not just a matter of if, either; the more you sit, the more you raise your risk of dropping dead from a whole host of issues. Even if you're active, and hit the gym regularly, you undo all your hard work by sitting on your bum for 8+ hours a day. <BR> <BR> I'm the world's worst about this. I sit so much my butt starts to hurt, and my back ach... Sat, 20 Apr 2013 17:26:41 EST What a day! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5328969 So today has been pretty awesome. I was tired this morning, but dragged my sorry behind out of bed, and got the girls off too school. <BR> <BR> It's been a bit grey today, but that didn't matter, because today I got to have tea and lunch with OBIESMOM! She came down to see me, and it was wonderful to talk to another Sparker and get to actually talk about things I love. No one else around here wants to hear me blabber about yummy foods and running woes! <BR> <BR> After our (very long!) lu... Fri, 19 Apr 2013 18:13:51 EST Canine love helps Boston victims http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5327807 <link>www.today.com/pets/distraction-reali<BR>ty-comfort-dogs-bring-peace-boston-vic<BR>tims-1C9406658 </link> <BR> <BR> This made me smile. I've been a bit gloom-and-doom lately, but this made me really thankful for the fact that the good people in humanity far, far outnumber the evil. Thu, 18 Apr 2013 16:36:56 EST When it's not just his problem http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5326414 Some of you may already know that I am married to an alcoholic. I've been attending Al Anon meetings, and he's been irregularly going to AA. <BR> <BR> The journey to recovery has been SO difficult for us; far harder than I ever dreamed it would be. If you'd spoken to me just a month about my husband alcoholism, I would have waved you off and said "Yeah, he's an alcoholic, but he's not that bad." <BR> <BR> Oh my, how deluded I was. <BR> <BR> In just a few short weeks, things spiralled ou... Wed, 17 Apr 2013 12:14:59 EST