DEVOTEEOFISET's SparkPeople Blog DEVOTEEOFISET's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community 2014 Wow! My last blog was Nov 2012! 2012! 2013 was a bad year. I was laid off in early January 2013. Without disposable income, I could no longer hide in money, things, hobbies, activities, all the things that mask my true feelings. 2013 was about dismantling, trying, losing, facing truths, grieving, and lots of emotional turmoil. My stepfather fell from the roof in September and has been out of work with no income and that has put a strain on everyone. <BR> <BR> I was determined to make... Sun, 12 Jan 2014 22:50:47 EST I am fabulous! You know most the time I feel like I go around in a sleep. We forget how awesome we are. We forget how much we have to give the world. We forget our truth and how beautiful our light is. We focus on the outward. <BR> <BR> I was looking around at some of my achievements, some of my old journals, pages, and forums and I just thought, "I am fabulous" <BR> <BR> I AM FABULOUS!!! <em>104</em> <BR> <BR> Now let's get our bodies to reflect how awesome we all are!!!! <em>9</em> Thu, 15 Nov 2012 15:21:00 EST Mindful Eating & Hunger Pangs So after reading and watching some programs, I decided to really give the principles of Ayruveda a shot. One of the ideas presented was to eat with your hands, eat small portions of foods - whole organic foods locally grown and in align with your dosha needs, eat with no distractions, no speaking, just be mindful and chew chew chew each bite many times. <BR> <BR> I knew I would feel fuller much quicker but I was actually surprised by how full I felt and how fast. It was really odd listen... Thu, 15 Nov 2012 14:56:07 EST My Struggle.. I mean Journey.. I mean Struggle. I mean Journey :-P UPDATED 11/19/12 <BR> My Fall into Fitness 2012: 90-Day Challenge - Ongoing Post <BR> <BR> I want to keep a record of the actual journey, wins, losses... I will update as I progress. This will also keep my profile less cluttered. <BR> <BR> <em>465</em> ** My Fall into Fitness 2012: 90-Day Challenge goals are as follows: <em>465</em> <BR> <BR> 9/24/12 to 12/24/12 <BR> <BR> <em>192</em> 1. To lose 30 lbs during the 13 weeks. <em>192</em> <BR> Track everyday! Stay aware. Don... Thu, 15 Nov 2012 14:54:54 EST Personal Inspiration for wanting to cheat * This started out as a comment, then a status, now a blog post I can refer to....* <BR> <BR> *What is good for you, is bad for dis-ease. What is bad for you is good for dis-ease.* <BR> <BR> So if you are sitting there thinking sugar or honey, french fries or apple, remember white refined sugar, cheetos, mcdonalds, it is all junk and feeds illness/dis-ease. <BR> <BR> The word food is defined as " any nourishing substance that is eaten, drunk, or otherwise taken into the body to sustain li... Tue, 25 Sep 2012 10:47:37 EST Diet My mother came home from her doctor. The doctor told her the most important thing is DIET. Number 1 - Diet. <BR> <BR> The diet suggested. <BR> <BR> Did it come from the sea? <BR> Did it come from the earth? <BR> Did it come from the air? <BR> Does it have only one ingredient? <BR> Did it come from some plant (ie. processing/manufacturing plant)? <BR> <BR> So you are only to eat things that are of one ingredient, not processed, and came from the earth, sea. <BR> <BR> Which means no ... Tue, 25 Sep 2012 09:46:22 EST Water Water Water On my spiritual path, my next step is to understand, honor, love and adore the element of water. <BR> <BR> This means only drinking water for 9 days. No coffee, tea, soda, no water with flavor packets etc. There is also much more to it but the drinking only water seems to be the hardest part. So I am not going to beat myself up over food the next few days but I will complete this 9 day water meditation. I am determined!!!!! <BR> <BR> I will update this post to reflect the journey ah... Tue, 25 Sep 2012 09:45:34 EST 90 Day Fall into Fitness Challenge It is so disheartening to have so much hope, *try* and then end up back in frustration, despair yearning for a perfect day one! To change my life. <BR> To be free from all the crap. <BR> <BR> I was at a class this weekend and he talked about balance and that you can't live in the future and you can't live in the present. You need to be in the moment but you need to recognize there is a tomorrow and to bring balance into your life. <BR> <BR> Now, that the astrological time is in Libra, t... Mon, 24 Sep 2012 11:28:54 EST 8/22/12 Progress - 29 Days to go This morning I ate quinoa, mushrooms for breakfast along and shortly after greek yogurt with honey. I was able to resist the morning Donut Day and I pick them up for the office!!! <BR> <BR> I used to eat a juice, chocolate milk, a bagel, 10 munchkins and maybe a coffee roll on Wednesdays. They were always my gluten days. Today I was able to resist everything until 1pm when I had a sweet tooth and had some munchkins. The sad part is 2 munckins had no jelly so I ate two more. <BR> But I ... Wed, 22 Aug 2012 13:48:32 EST 6 Month Commitment to Change I am happy that so many of my friends are losing weight and getting healthy. I think I have at least 6-7 that I can think of right now, on the journey to wellness. This makes me very excited because with strong people succeeding in your corner, you can only feel surged along by their inspirational stories. <BR> <BR> I went to my health coach last night. During the first session we discussed the importance of greens in your diet. Last night we discussed the importance of adding the righ... Wed, 22 Aug 2012 11:15:20 EST Ding Ding Ding * Final Round A few months ago, I was walking in a store and I caught myself in the mirror. I always had this image of myself as I will never let myself get *THAT* fat. In my denial, I could allow myself to ignore and live in my own fantasy as long as I wasn't as fat as this horrible image. <BR> <BR> Then I passed this mirror and I am *THAT* FAT. I mean I am fatter than *THAT* fat. <BR> Since then I have been actively trying to deconstruct my perceptions. <BR> <BR> Luckily I was able to meet a wonde... Tue, 21 Aug 2012 10:50:12 EST A-Z Survey Fun A. Age: 32 <BR> <BR> B. Bed size: Twin <BR> <BR> C. Chore you dislike: Dishes <BR> <BR> D. Dogs: No. I would love one. <BR> <BR> E. Essential start to your day: I don't know. Breakfast. Smoothie. <BR> <BR> F. Favorite color: Changes. Blue/Red <BR> <BR> G. Gold or silver: Buy gold, Wear silver <BR> <BR> H. Height: 5' 1" <BR> <BR> I. Instruments you play(ed): piano <BR> <BR> J. Job title: Administrative Assistant <BR> <BR> K. Kids: None. someday? <BR> <BR> L. Live: Southeast... Tue, 10 May 2011 11:45:21 EST Flightless Bird devises a plan. I have tried many attempts at life change. Maybe I should say I have thought about many attempts at life change, trying occasionally in intervals of short endurance after a burst of inspiration. <BR> <BR> What works? Going to the gym and exericse works, daily accountability and tracking works, eating right works. <BR> <BR> Why do I falter? <BR> Stress: Write it down, break it down, categorize everything I need to do and know. I GOT THIS. <BR> <BR> No Support: All I can do is fak... Tue, 12 Apr 2011 21:04:36 EST Flightless Bird vents. Professionals state that change is made when (a. you reach a critical crisis point or b. the pain of changing becomes less than the pain of not changing.) <BR> <BR> Someone said to me that there are two types of people. Imagine you are in a baseball game, the first type fears the ball coming to them. The second type is like I want it. Give me the ball. <BR> <BR> I was born a spunky talkative joyous little girl who wanted the ball. I wanted to be the center of attention. I wanted ... Tue, 12 Apr 2011 20:36:54 EST To Smack Talk or not to Smack Talk You know sometimes it is so much more fun to have a friend that you can smack talk too. Someone who can take it and who can dish just as well. Someone who knows you so well that they can give you the zingers that are funny and harsh but true. Someone who doesn't sneakily wish your demise while they smile to your face but instead grunts and says all this smack but secretly wants your success. <BR> <BR> It is really fun and really scary to because you have to make sure you are just as goo... Wed, 16 Mar 2011 15:29:09 EST New Plan A co-worker mentioned that one of the popular diets, when you go to your weigh-in, if you go over or do not lose weight, you pay them money. <BR> <BR> This got me to thinking.... So I am trying the 23847th thing and hopefully this one is the LAST ONE. <BR> <BR> My friend Amy and I are going to weigh in each Wednesday morning with pictures to prove. <BR> We have set a 2 lb goal for each week ending on 7/13/11 for a total of 20 weeks. <BR> <BR> For each lb lost, we get $5 in our "bank" ... Mon, 28 Feb 2011 13:02:06 EST Feb 2011 - Into Month Two - What are you waiting for? I hope I am back. My waist line can't afford any more trips down the candy aisle. <BR> I can definitely FEEL what my lifestyles is doing to my body. That is what getting older is about. I can feel the bad choices. I am out of breath, have no stamina and now for the first time - heart burn. <BR> <BR> I went to a meeting and the little girl asked me if I had a baby in my stomach right in front of everyone. Ok, I think this is my very very bottom of the barrel. I ate all the sugar and n... Mon, 7 Feb 2011 12:15:30 EST Stressplosions I have been trying to spend my time pushing myself past comfort zones. While doing this, I have been trying to focus on reflection instead of blind action. Instead of eating two whoppers, sit back and really reflect if the whopper will be my best choice in this moment. <BR> <BR> I have noticed that I tend to put so much pressure on myself. I write up a to do list with 42 things on it and get stressed and start mentally punishing myself and then puffing up like a windbag trying to let ou... Tue, 11 Jan 2011 08:37:45 EST Living a life with purpose. "You must learn not to be afraid of the world, to not take any notice of it." - Howard Roark <BR> <BR> I find that when I am busy running around I lose a sense of creativity. Almost like a wall has built up around my insides and I have so much stagnation to weed through to find any semblence of a connection to the words I feel inside. <BR> <BR> I feel like the past few months things are brewing and changing. <BR> <BR> I want to culitivate myself and be proud of my producing and creation... Sun, 9 Jan 2011 21:26:59 EST Okay, Breathe... It is just one more thing. Last week, I decided to get back in the swing of things. But since May I feel like I have some kind of crazy monkey in my life just flinging all kinds of challenges and poop my way. <BR> <BR> A few times I prayed to an angel and then things got worse. And I keep thinking wow, every time you try to improve, everything in the universe positions itself to make sure you don't succeed. <BR> <BR> And I know this is counterproductive so I have been trying to think of yes changing my life will ... Thu, 21 Oct 2010 12:30:42 EST It is the pain we make truth that still burns so deep within. "Nothing has really sunk in" ... "This flesh and bone" <BR> <BR> "Just the way we are tied in..." <BR> <BR> "But there is no one home...." <BR> <BR> "i grieve..." <BR> <BR> I sit here 32 years old. Once a beautiful spitefire, destroyed by parental children who didn't know better. <BR> <BR> For me hitting bottom is looking up one day not quite at anything in particular and <BR> for one moment sensing everything I ever ran from. Not even a tear was shed but a light was cast upon the... Sun, 17 Oct 2010 18:19:41 EST Peeking my head out ~ Finding a way back. I can't believe how time flies. I swear it was just July 14 - yesterday. Every day I go to work, I think I should log into sparkpeople and then I realize how much I have to catch up on and I don't. <BR> <BR> So today.... I logged in. I will wade through my groups, comments, mail and reassess. <BR> <BR> I have to find something that works for me, fits into my schedule. <BR> <BR> I have come back to sparkpeople humbled, full of McDonalds and Twix, lost, alone, and with no way out of any... Thu, 14 Oct 2010 10:11:46 EST Emotions and releasing energy 1. <BR> <BR> Throughout the years, I have stopped exercising and then decided to break that habit with some intense exercise. <BR> <BR> The first time when I was 16, I was watching one of Gilad's shows and I kept having that ugly cry while I was working out. That I have no idea why I am crying and I don't "feel" any emotions but it feels as if your body is sobbing and you just can't stop. <BR> <BR> Then it happened with Billy Blanks TaeBo. <BR> <BR> Over the years during my on and off... Wed, 11 Aug 2010 15:26:53 EST Review for 8/4/10 NUTRITION <BR> [X] Drink One Green / Vege / Fruit Smoothie with added vitamins (Omegas, Coconut Oil, CoQ10, Amino Acids, Enyzmes, Aloe Vera <BR> [X] Take Supplements: SamE, DHEA, Zinc, Magnesium <BR> [ ] 2 Bottles of Water <BR> [ ] 1 Bottle of Lemon Water <BR> [X] No soda <BR> [X] Eat healthy snacks <BR> <BR> I also chose a healthy lunch of hummus. <BR> <BR> BODY HEALTH: <BR> [ ] 8 oz of water prior to exercise, during every 30 mins and after. <BR> [ ] Exercise - Whoo hoo <BR> <B... Thu, 5 Aug 2010 10:11:39 EST Review for 8/3/10 DAILY TASK REVIEW FOR 8/3/10 <BR> <BR> NUTRITION <BR> [X] Drink One Green / Vege / Fruit Smoothie with added vitamins (Omegas, Coconut Oil, CoQ10, Amino Acids, Enyzmes, Aloe Vera <BR> [X] Take Supplements: SamE, DHEA, Zinc, Magnesium <BR> [ ] 2 Bottles of Water <BR> [ ] 1 Bottle of Lemon Water <BR> [X] No soda <BR> [ ] Eat healthy snacks <BR> <BR> BODY HEALTH: <BR> [ ] 8 oz of water prior to exercise, during every 30 mins and after. <BR> [X] Exercise - Whoo hoo <BR> <BR> <BR> DI... Wed, 4 Aug 2010 09:58:54 EST 38 days to prove myself I can't tell you how many times I tell myself I will _____________________. <BR> I can't tell you how many times I fail at _____________________________. <BR> <BR> When life hands me opportunities, I want to be at a place where I can feel I can accept them and take advantage of each one. <BR> <BR> I could look at the last 52 days as failures or momentum leading up to growth. <BR> <BR> I choose momentum. <BR> <BR> I am still working on my full plan but I have to get something out. <BR> ... Mon, 2 Aug 2010 23:18:40 EST Clubs, Activites, Overwhelmed, OH MY! I think/feel/know that the amount of things on my plate is chipping away at my chances of success. It is also the reason of my denial, over-relaxation and feelings of being overwhelmed. <BR> <BR> I try to keep all my activities separate with separate emails and I belong to a lot but only a few activities happen with each one and tons of communication emails and it just gets overwhelming. <BR> <BR> How do you stay in touch with events without staying in touch with every piece of communi... Fri, 23 Jul 2010 11:22:02 EST Disillusioned and .... Must. Suceed. Must. Do. I have been drinking at least 12 oz of my health smoothie every day since June 16th. I am feeling the health benefits, only missing I think one day. And I should feel good because by drinking the smoothies I can eat whatever and still maintain my weight. So I am not yo-yoing back up to 194 and back down. <BR> <BR> However, I want to lose not maintain lol. I know the key ingredient is more water, schedule, meditation and exercise. And track the junk I eat. If I eat VERY VERY good, I ... Fri, 23 Jul 2010 09:29:29 EST Getting Serious about Running?!/? <em>311</em> Running Goals: <em>312</em> <BR> <BR> May 2011 - 10 Mile Broad Street Run <BR> October 2011 - Niagara Falls International Marathon with Tetengria (AKA KATIE)??? <BR> April 2012 - Paris Marathon <BR> <BR> I would love to do these international marathons. They have some in <BR> <link><BR>fm?pid=10213 </link> <BR> <BR> Italy, Hawaii, China, Spain..... <BR> <BR> I miss England. I would love to be back there and run and Germany! <BR> ... Fri, 16 Jul 2010 15:57:56 EST ~~ 32 and counting scratch that NOT COUNTING!! Usually I think of certain times of the year as a goal - look great for my birthday, look great for New Years/Christmas and of course I always fail. <BR> <BR> I tried to pull out of everything the past few days and really - relax, chill, take the whip off my back and try to enjoy myself. It was nice to have a few consecutive days off of work where I did nothing much of anything at all. <BR> <BR> I read over 1500 pages and started two paintings. <BR> <BR> ~~ Did I do everything I wan... Thu, 15 Jul 2010 09:58:51 EST **My Eight Week Plan** <em>46</em> When I am overly stressed, especially overly avoiding or dreading an event or have no funds but need to provision food or gas, etc… I get distraught and can’t focus. <BR> <em>46</em> Recently every time, I try to put on a happy strong face, stuff happens to enforce the idea that I am stuck and nothing will change. <BR> <em>46</em> In August, I am 5 years out of a loving relationship. And it is getting harder to say oh yeah, he is right around the corner. I don’t know if I c... Wed, 7 Jul 2010 15:59:59 EST To jump, stand still or walk away. Determination: the quality of being resolute; firmness of purpose. <BR> <BR> Fight: to contend in any manner; strive vigorously for something <BR> <BR> As I get older, I realize that my ideals, my strivings, my .... is all a mental trapping. <BR> <BR> I feel like I walk through a valley of shadows casting light on different ways of being or different ways of perception and sometimes I see all kinds of lies and manipulations. <BR> <BR> Sometimes I see what life could be. Sometimes I ... Tue, 6 Jul 2010 16:02:47 EST I am tired. I am so unbelieveably tired. My intuition tells me because I am overwhelmed mentally with stress and I am forcing my self to stay on task and continue to eat well that my body is doing a big detox. My mysterious rash is back and spreading and I can't tell you how I feel. It feels like war in my system. A strong nutrition front coming in and attacking everything. <BR> <BR> I am tired and get tired easily. I have to lay down. Then I get a few moments of energy and then I feel so drain... Tue, 6 Jul 2010 08:44:58 EST Hard Lesson to Learn When I can give up everything for one goal, I can focus everything I am into that one thing and I end up achieving amazing results. <BR> <BR> However, I have so many different things I need to work on and so many areas of focus that I tend to lean on outside people/situations for motivation. <BR> <BR> A new boyfriend who is inteligent and amazing will spark me to amazing results. <BR> A new job gives me inspiration to maybe find a new path. <BR> A new toy or book lets me feel special. <B... Thu, 1 Jul 2010 21:34:13 EST Yummy Smoothies Today's Rough Smoothie list: <BR> <BR> 1 cup Aloe Vera Juice <BR> 1.5 cups of Spinach <BR> 3 chunks of brocolli <BR> 1 tsp of spirulina powder <BR> Fiber 35 chocolate creme powder packet <BR> 2 bananas <BR> 1 apple <BR> 2 tbsp flax seeds <BR> 2 tbsp coconut oil <BR> <BR> This made roughly 28 oz. I drank 16 oz today and added about 4oz of water to loosen and some ice. <BR> <BR> I found a smoothie lovers group!!! I can't wait to add my recipes and find/make more!!! <BR> <link>tea... Thu, 1 Jul 2010 13:40:28 EST My Experiments I tried eating SUPERBLY well meeting all nutrient goals. <BR> I tried getting my max of water daily. <BR> I tried getting my max of fiber daily. <BR> I tried working out every day. <BR> <BR> And I found that if you only do one of the above really well. I won't succeed in my weight loss goals. It takes a lot to structure your day to make sure you meet one of these goals. The only thing that seems to get immediate fast results is a FAD Diet or one of those strict diets people take prior s... Thu, 1 Jul 2010 08:14:35 EST The Training Diaries - Phase Five Phase 5: July 1 - 14 <BR> <BR> To Accomplish in this phase: <BR> <BR> ~~ Daily Exercise <BR> ~~ Daily Writing <BR> ~~ Continue smoothie, breakfast and good food <BR> ~~ Complete watching spending and tracking <BR> ~~ Find a way to recenter and reset for Phase 6 <BR> <BR> Stats: <BR> <BR> It takes 21 days to establish a habit. <BR> <BR> I am 15 days into smoothie, breakfast and good food habit. <BR> By my birthday I can be 30 days into smoothie, 14 days into writing and exercise habi... Wed, 30 Jun 2010 20:11:49 EST Motivation and Relaxation I have been feeling completely boxed in, trapped without a way out for years to come, no sun poking through and each time I try to succeed in spite of it all, I get another wack upside the head. <BR> <BR> I just realized I have 2.5 days of work, 3 off, 3.5 work, 5.5 days off. I haven't had 5.5 days off in such a long time. I have to share it and some really intense hell is coming that week for my birthday *YEAH* but.... <BR> <BR> Maybe in this time I can find a way to pay the pied piper ... Wed, 30 Jun 2010 12:06:44 EST Life, Vita-Pee, Status Ever have so many ideas in your head and you think, I will blog that, oh and that and that and this will be my new format.... Weeks later you have all this gunk in your head with all of these should ofs, wishes and you miss a lot of good reflection and real growth moments. <BR> <BR> I have to work on that. I have to accept Erica in this moment. Who cares about the right picture, right emoticon, perfect sentence, perfect format, just get it out! <BR> <BR> Today is 14 days of smoothies, cho... Tue, 29 Jun 2010 13:04:30 EST My First Three Attempts at Health Smoothies I am hooked! I am getting so much more fruits and veges in and it is just the beginning. <BR> <BR> I was inspired by Montell Williams, Katie AKA Tetengria and <link> </link> <BR> <BR> My First Try: <BR> <em>470</em> Straw-Choconana <em>470</em> <BR> <BR> Ingredients: <BR> 1 Scoop of Fiber 35 Fitsmart Chocolate Creme <BR> 2 Handfuls of Spinach <BR> 4 Leaves of Red Swiss Chard <BR> 4 Inner Leaves of Romaine Lettuce <BR> 6 Blackberries <BR> 6 Strawberries ... Fri, 18 Jun 2010 20:41:09 EST To become a phoenix plan - phase ? Two Insights: <BR> <BR> *** The more I succeed, the harder life comes down on me. I feel like the past week has been a storm of emotions and flip flopping between AH HA! YES! to completely overwhelmed and I can't seem to handle any stress. And I know that I am finally reaching a point in my journey that I was always afraid to go but it is still just the beginning. I am kind of excited that I am here but worried because I feel like the imaginary noose around my neck is so tight I just want... Wed, 16 Jun 2010 21:50:24 EST Erica's Aura Picture & Mini Mini Reading <img src=""> <BR> <BR> ~~ I have an exciting and creative future ahead of me. Orange is a mixture of active red and intellectual yellow. I will feel confidence and personal power begin and finally complete projects which interest me. <BR> <BR> ~~ Now is time to promote creative ideas and inspiration. <BR> <BR> My Color Sign is Orange <BR> My Left and Right sides are Balanced <BR> My Heart, Throat, Third Eye, Crown Chakras need so... Mon, 7 Jun 2010 13:22:30 EST Out of the comfort zone into the fire. I can't tell you how many zones I worked on this weekend. <BR> <BR> ~~ Leaving work with work incomplete <BR> ~~ Knowing I didn't meet my goals but went to an event anyway. <BR> ~~ Making a hard phone call <BR> ~~ Driving into the city and fighting rush hour traffic <BR> ~~ Instead of rushing and giving up Erica experience/time, I let go of the need and went on my time in my time and trusted everything will be okay and it was. (did this x3) <BR> ~~ Went to this event, I met at least 5 people... Mon, 7 Jun 2010 13:11:07 EST Practice makes Better. Since listening to Anthony Robbins, I have been trying to carry with me a new mindset of flow and bringing forth and being connected. I am worth it. I am beautiful. I am smart and funny and creative. Now I have to work through the issues, create a healthy body and find my purpose in life. Live my passion and purpose and find a new YES! <BR> <BR> Work is stressful. I went to work at 630 an every 1.5 yesterday because I was taking a half day. <BR> I will go in another 1.5 on monday bec... Fri, 4 Jun 2010 11:01:17 EST The Tony Robbins Value Train ~ chugga chugga choo choo I love personality tests and the like. I like to see myself from another view. Just something to think about and question against. How often can you sit down with your best girlfriends and get a real critique --- or a boyfriend/spouse and not be offended. <BR> <BR> This one measures 7 dimensions of motivation -- HOW COOL IS THAT? AND HOW NEEDED... <BR> <BR> My summary: <BR> <BR> This reading breaks down each section into general traits, key strengths, motivational insights, and then ... Tue, 1 Jun 2010 21:43:59 EST The Tony Robbins Train ~~ DISC Index I am really trying to embrace and become success from a cellular level. Kick all the negativo crap to the door. <BR> <BR> I took the profile on his site. It is called the Innermetrix - a modern interpretation on Dr. William Marston's behavioral dimensions. <BR> <BR> What I learned about myself: <BR> <BR> ~~ We have a natural style which we adopt under stress or when we are being authentic. <BR> ~~ We have an adaptive style that we use when we feel we are being observed. If we stay i... Tue, 1 Jun 2010 21:12:47 EST The Training Diaries - Entry Three (Phase One, Day Six) <em>213</em> Erica: Hi Ryan <BR> I sheepishly look at him as I know I haven't logged in and every time he would attempt to speak to me, I would think to him, ah huh I got it, I will log later. <BR> <BR> <em>10</em> Trainer Ryan Blythe Salvatore: Well, Lady what you have been up to? <BR> <BR> <em>41</em> Erica: Are you mad? <BR> <BR> <em>10</em> Trainer Ryan Blythe Salvatore: I am disappointed. I know that you weren't so busy that you couldn't just log on and say something.... Mon, 31 May 2010 11:59:28 EST The Training Diaries - Entry Two (Phase One, Day Two) <em>10</em> Trainer Ryan Salvatore: How was your day? <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <em>198</em> Erica: At work, I am fighting rage, exhaustion, strong desire to do well and please, and being overwhelmed and under supported at work. I got to work early but left my keys somewhere, I lost them after yesterday's car fiasco. So I just sat in the car and cried. <BR> <BR> It is one thing to say let go and take it easy, one task at a time and it is another to do it when you have 5 depts/people all... Thu, 27 May 2010 22:57:41 EST The Training Diaries - Entry One (Phase One, Day One) <em>10</em> Trainer Ryan Salvatore: I know you love to give up and you get overwhelmed by the sheer tasks you want to accomplish. We are going to set small phases - short bursts of great progress, followed by review and then short bursts of progress. <BR> <BR> Phase One: May 26th to June 1st. <BR> <BR> Yesterday we made a daily action grid. Each day I want you to accomplish the agreed upon activities to enhance your life, cultivate love and happiness, lose weight and get fit. <... Wed, 26 May 2010 22:26:34 EST ~ My Personal Training Plan ~ Life is about growing and experiencing life. Life is about make a decision and act. Act and do better than you did before. If you make a mistake, grow and keep moving. Don't keep doing the same thing expecting different results. Don't keep making the same mistakes. <BR> <BR> For now, I am going to focus on being my own trainer and kicking my butt into gear. <BR> <BR> Goals: <BR> ---Write a book and develop through writing. <BR> ---Lose weight, get toned. <BR> ---Experience and Be. <B... Tue, 25 May 2010 21:31:10 EST